#realizing I can just DRAW myself with my bbg’s has changed my life for the worse

[dilutedconfusion]

He’s right behind me isn’t he?

#I PHYSCIALLY CANNOT STOP DRAWING #I concocted this little joke and my hand FLEW to my ipad #the lighting in this WAS SO FUN BTW #we both have completely opposite direction of lighting so no kid doesn’t have a beard lol #it just so happens that the character I love the most is my worst nightmare btw #i can’t tell if he wants to kill me or smooch me #I’m praying for both #i used a screenshot of kid i found to make him look more like himself #so therefore he looks less soft and more insane per usual #I KEEP COMING UP WITH FUNNY SELFSHIP ASS MEMES TO DRAW #so like expect more of those #realizing I can just DRAW myself with my bbg’s has changed my life for the worse #I’m like 30% more insane and foaming at the mouth #eustass kid #eustasscaptainkid #one piece #one piece eustass #self ship #PEOPLE SHOULD DRAW THEMSELVES LIKE THIS WITH THEIR EVIL FAV CAHRACTER

[skenney15-blog]

Back to the drawing board...

After losing 30 lbs almost 4 years ago, I never thought the weight would come back. In all honesty, I held it off for awhile. That’s until the real world hit.

After a year of two hour commutes, a desk job, the stress of a six week unemployment period, a knee injury and the list goes on and on, I was right back where I started and more miserable than before.

I’ve never been a tiny girl. I was an athlete growing up and naturally built because of it. The calves I got from cross country and soccer have not gone away and to this day I can squat a fair amount of weight. For years though, I have fought my body to be skinny. All I had ever wanted were those tight abs, thigh gap, and…a smaller chest too. For those who know me very personally, that has always been a struggle of mine.

There was a point I was “skinny”. After coming back from six months spent in Europe, I weighed 125 pounds, and probably have never looked worse in my life. While I was skinny, I looked unhealthy, which in a way was kind of true. I had been eating a poor diet because most of the time I was over there, I could not afford the cost of living and began living off of soups, salads, and steamed broccoli.

I think back on that and realize I am not meant to be a skinny girl. Just like all women, I am meant to be a healthy girl. I actually like muscle. After leg day, when my quads are throbbing and I can barely get down to sit in a chair, I’m excited. Or when I see the definition forming in my arms after triceps dips.

To re-focus and think about my goals specifically, I’ve decided to write and give myself a place to vent my thoughts about this process. Somedays it’s not easy. I beat myself up to no end sometimes about missing a workout when I work too late at the office or have a change to my schedule. But there are also days, I am really proud of the progress I make, little and large.

When I first went through my weight loss journey, I made sure to eat the things I wanted, go out the nights I felt like it, and continue to live the life I had wanted to live. Back then, I was also walking close to four miles a day on top of two workouts a day. So now, I am adjusting this to the sedentary lifestyle that comes with working a desk job that happens to be a one hour each way commute from where I live.

Now, I am buckling down and focusing on my fitness goals. I have signed up for my first triathlon EVER and I’m about to run my first half marathon (yay!! BIG DEAL after a knee injury) and I am attempting 12 weeks of Kayla Itsine’s BBG. 

To me, it’s just a giant science experiment, to see what I can create out of fueling my body with various “chemicals” and changing the environmental factors…totally not a science person, but you get my point.

Wish me luck!

Sarah

#getfit bbg kaylasarmy halfmarathontraining firsthalfmarathon firsttriathlon weightloss gettinginshape