I’ve gone 31 years on this rock without knowing about webtoons…when I tell you I’ve INHALED a handful so far😅 It’s currently 1:40 am and I’m sobbing over Days of Hana it was so beautiful. If anyone has any recommendations I’ll gladly take them! 🖤 PS I’ll be adding more as I go. Please keep those recs coming!🖤
Here’s what I’ve read so far:
~Webtoon~
• Midnight Poppy Land (as of 3/24/2023) BACK FROM HIATUS!!! Welcome back Lilydusk!!🖤🖤🖤
• SubZero (also back from hiatus as of 2/19/2023!!!)
• Atnomen
• My Gently Raised Beast (spin-off happening)
• The Witch and the Bull (back from hiatus)
• Days of Hana (complete)
• Brimstone and Roses (on hiatus)
• Down to Earth
• Eaternal Nocturnal (back from hiatus!! Another current favorite🖤)
• Phase (back from hiatus)
• Your Wish (on hiatus til 8/14/2023)
• Reunion (complete)
• Morgana and Oz (back from hiatus)
• Maybe Meant to Be (current favorite 🖤 and on hiatus)
• I Love Yoo (other current favorite 🖤 and also on hiatus)
• Let’s Play (complete, but feels unfinished lol)
• Happily Ever Afterwards (complete? There was a series finale, but it still says “updated every Thursday” so🤷🏻♀️)
• The Alpha King’s Claim
• Edith (no hate to the author, but I actually stopped reading. Love the art, I just don’t care about the story there, you know?)
• Lovestuck
• Lovephobia
• Hello Baby
• Now, I am a Demon King’s Wife
• Flatmates with Benefits
• The Dragon King's Bride
• Goth Girl & The Jock
• Annie Green Hates Girls
Stellar Wish (on hiatus)
What Melvin Left Behind
Fins
Not Your Typical Reincarnation Story
What the Evil Dragon Lives For
Who Stole the Empress?
My Far Too Tumultuous Marriage
Wished You Were Dead
~Manta~
• Under the Oak Tree
• Lies Become You
• Disobey the Duke if You Dare
• Moonrise by the Cliff
• Your Eternal Lies
• Falling for the Enemy (complete)
• The Golden Forest
• Totem’s Realm
• Bloody Sweet (complete)
• Taming the Emperor’s Hound
• Amina of the Lamp (complete)
• Isnelda
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I don't remember at what points in my life things changed drastically
I guess that's not really something that happened to me, at least in a way I can fully comprehend
They were mostly slow rolls, all throughout. Except maybe the whole moving every 4-5 years when those actually forced me to change schools but that was just a fixture of life for me at that point
Except times I remember- being young, and wanting to be loved more, and yearning for kindness and comfort when I was upset. I remember distinctly thinking that at the rate things were going, nobody could save me from the loneliness
Too smart for my own good, or may smart enough to avoid whatever hole that would have led me down
I knew I had to do it myself
I didn't have the courage nor charisma to reach out to others and make friends at the time, my parents weren't evil but they WERE old school and from a different time AND culture
They weren't raised on American Television, which despite everything still showed love and care every now and then, in cartoons, on the family channel. Childhood best friends forever and understanding parents
Impossible for me, I thought. At least impossible with the conditions and semantics I thought were needed
I had to save myself
And I couldn't really
I could only do so much and I tried so hard
But I was an awkward lonely teenager with no emotional strength or foundation learning everything a bit too late and a bit too slow
But nobody could save me, I had to do it myself
It's a flawed viewpoint but it was all I had, and despite everything it made me not give up hope
For better or for worse I always started with nothing, so losing what due to my own failings or due to shifts in my life usually didn't feel like the end of the world
But it's not good for growth you know? I was already a little behind because I didn't socialize much and it was scary out there
I learned the best ways to deflect statements that hurt me, I learned ways to try and not step on toes, I learned to better slow myself down and often try to think before I speak
And once I had that I could build myself up the way I wanted to, a decade and a half late
I'd given up on so much
There was enough "wrong" with me that I spent most of my time struggling against myself whenever I wasn't doing school or work
I remember a particularly bad meltdown haunting me for three years before I felt it ebb
It's not like anyone else brought it up either, it was just me. All me
I didn't feel like I had too much time for therapy or counseling. I didn't know where to look and I didn't even know what to say
And I spent so much time thinking and going over things in my head that what I WAS able to put into words sounded perfectly coherent and healthy
Eventually counseling helped a little, but there's just a lot that I couldn't rely on someone else for because I didn't know how
And there haven't been that many drastic changes, at least I thought
Not when everything feels like a mountain to climb and every effort feels like digging into the stone with my fingers
Nobody could save me
To get what I wanted I had to do it myself
I envy the dolls here sometimes. I envy the hope they have in Witches sometimes. Granted I don't go to those spaces. But I see the texts sometimes. I'm so exhausted but I feel like letting myself have that hope goes counter to everything I've struggled for, that I've fought for, that parts of me have died for
I really, really, wanted someone to save me
There is this concept of a Witch's unconditional love for her dolls that probably would have made me happy long ago
At the very least a moment in life where I could rest properly for once
But it's not what I want anymore
At least not wholly
It IS nice to relax and let go every now and then, to rely on others as best as I can, to be myself
It's nice to let myself be a burden and be taken care of every now and then
But I am my own Witch, first and foremost
I built my own soul, my own purpose, my own magic, my own pride
My sliver of humanity that shines as bright as any torch in the darkness
I and we and she reached through the mirror and chiseled the jagged heart of our reflections into a smooth core
I won't give up on her
I won't give up on the Witch I was yesterday who struggled to bring me here today, just as she didn't give up on me yesterday, nor the day before, or before that
Even as she climbed over my shattered cerebral porcelain, and I climbed over hers, and mine and hers- from even before I flowered from the prince's tomb
I won't give up on her
I'm a bit manic and delusional and a bit sleep deprived it seems
But I won't give up on her
She never gave up on me
When did it become like this?
Never, not really, it didn't become, it grew
From a flower, to a garden
Porcelain with gold between the cracks is still broken, but it still functions, and it's still beautiful
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