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iamnightduchess · 3 years

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ReinerxMikasa (ReiKasa) Extremely Kinky A to Z Ask Game (R20+) Headcanon #19

*Update: 24 March 2021

A continuation of this ask & inspired by this original post. Dedicated to @xrocketmanx for their amazing 💖 on my ko-fi page!

(A/N: ‼️WARNING‼️Graphic description of very explicit smut with potentially provocative images ⛔ Please don't click Keep Reading if you're below 20 🙅‍♀️ Sorry kiddos! To my more adult readers, please absorb this post's content with appropriate discretion & maturity)

(In complete Alphabetical Order)

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

People expect Reiner to be the one who would jump off the bed immediately soon after when they’re done but on the contrary, he just loves lying there and holding Mikasa in his arms post-coitus. Although, they do sleep with Mikasa lying on his chest most nights. Mikasa wasn’t used to be held intimately in the first few months of their relationship, so the first time they made love, Reiner gave her the space that she needed before, during and after. It was Mikasa who finally initiated their first cuddle post-coitus after the next several weeks.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Reiner: Very confident of his physical appearance and in his skin. He really loves everything on and about Mikasa. He loves her body type the way she is - to him, hers is just perfect. But, his most favorite body part of hers he'd like to touch first every time he could is her hands. He just like holding her hands when he wakes up, winding down for the night & even when he's asleep.

Mikasa: This woman, despite having a bombshell athletic figure, still secretly feels insecure of the way she looks. She loves Reiner's biceps the most - at home, she'll sneak a quick peck or a nibble on his biceps when he's doing the dishes or making dinner. She also likes to snuggle up to him on the couch with his arm draped around her shoulders, sometimes until she falls asleep.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… lol)

She...swallows? 🙈 (holy shizz i'm not so sure of this one. Can't think of a suitable answer without being cringey 🤣)

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Reiner & Mikasa once had a quickie inside the changing booth during a beach trip with their friends. Reiner had also went down on Mikasa after dinner at his mum's place, right in Karina's laundry room because he 'accidentally' spilt some wine on her dress & wanted to get her dress cleaned up. He ended up having her as dessert on top of the moving dryer & she left her underwear there by accident.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

They were both not each other’s first lovers but when they first got together, the experience is like being with no other. They discovered new parts & points of not only their significant other’s physical & spiritual strengths but also their own respective preferences as well. Reiner’s quite a ladies’ man during his early years in the military but after a while, he got bored of the game. Meeting Mikasa, he realised he wants to play the game again but this time to win it for good. Mikasa has only been with one boyfriend since college & being with Reiner opened her eyes up to vast possibilities.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

No, Reiner doesn't do the Military Style despite being a military man 🤣 Missionary & Cow Girl are their standard starting positions. Despite Mikasa being very flexible, which gave them more advantage in attempting the more physically-challenging positions, but the following are their more favorite experimental ones:

Oasis

Basket

Watering Can

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

A little bit of both, no doubt. Reiner has a dorky sense of humor & Mikasa's odd humor makes for a good tension-breaking combination. Their foreplays always begin with a good laugh - with Reiner ghosting his teasing touches on her love handles. Gets her in the mood for some serious sexing every time.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

For both, the carpets matched the drapes. Mikasa tried Brazillian wax once and uhh...Reiner abstained for a week & a half because he prefers her au naturalé 🙈 He said it felt odd from what he's used to haha

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

There are days they’ll just have a quickie if they get in the mood while just chilling, watching TV together after dinner. Before the children came, they would always have slow, intense eye-gazing, tantric, unrushed lovemaking. After the twins came into the picture, they’ll be lucky if they can even have cuddle time together >D Mikasa doesn’t say “I love you” out-loud but showed it in the way she touches & kisses Reiner’s arm when he’s in the kitchen making dinner or when he’s giving the twins a bath.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Oooh...Reiner rarely does this after he dated Mikasa & married her. But he loves getting her to touch herself in the showers. While he watches.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Did i tell you about their muscle kink & how much they love each other’s muscles?? Roleplay :) They like to pretend they’re strangers meeting in a cafe or a hotel bar and later have a ‘pretend one-night stand’ with each other haha It keeps the flame burning! (i posted a oneshot on this.)

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Home: bedroom, kitchen and in his home office. In the showers too!

They're not one to do it in public but they did have several outdoor trysts on the back of his 4WD while having a romantic night under the stars.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) haha can't help not including this gif

When Mikasa rubs one of Reiner's thighs, rest assured that his gears will be running. Meanwhile when Reiner nuzzles her neck and started caressing her abs, oh it's an on for her alright.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

⛔ Backdoors are a big N.O ⛔

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

They're both amazing givers... You know what it means: 34 + 35 🤫 Reiner would sometimes initiates when Mikasa's already asleep. Remember that Zoom Conference & online gaming session? Mikasa likes to get back at Reiner when he least expects it.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Both depending on their moods...quickies are usually fast pounding yet not too rough, Reiner respects Mikasa too much to ever be at risk of hurting her. Usually their lovemaking would be sensual & soul-bonding at the same time.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Mikasa prefers to wear pants when they ever go for outings, movie trips, hiking trips. But, she wears skirts when they're visiting their families for a reason: smoother access for quickies. The moment she walks down the stairs in a beautiful dress before they head to his mum's or her aunts', Reiner already knows it. They be getting freaky with a quickie later 🙈

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Reiner & Mikasa are very experimental in the bedroom. Sure, they don’t have frequent lovemaking but when they’re in the mood, fireworks are a guarantee throughout with different new positions ;) Risk-taker? Let’s just say Reiner’s virility and Mikasa’s flexibility provided a lot of perks in their love lives together (and some pregnancy scares too! before they were ready to conceive) Mikasa once gave Reiner head while they're stuck in traffic heading into a road block. He'd finished just before the the car in front of them pass the inspection 🙈

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Ooh boy, all night haha Rounds: 2 max at one time. Duration: At least 1.5hours X) They both are super fit, athletic people so one can expect their staminas to be nothing less than subpar. *cough* In Canon AU: Max 4 times or 1/3 of the night *winks* because supernatural & acker powers!

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

No, they don't 🙈

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Goes without saying: a lot. Mikasa likes to wear Reiner's tshirts/ dress shirts at home to tease him. While Reiner likes to wear his reading glasses a lot at home because that is one of her biggest turn ons from him.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Mikasa's the quiet one between the two and the loudest she'd ever been was just a deep, heavy whimper. Reiner's the louder one that sometimes Mikasa would have to smother him when they're having a quickie 🤣

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Even after more than 20 years together, Reiner and Mikasa still make out like they're teenagers - pretending to sneak around and grinding in hidden, cramped spaces away from their kids.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Mikasa : Dynamite & powerful grip - thighs and you-know-what (even after 3 kids!)

Reiner : Thicc - ass & this man is packing. He has girth!

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest: 15 🤣 There's something about getting Mikasa to relax and laugh during their chill time, that just instantaneously revved up their engines at the same time. Reiner is a very tender, romantic person & Mikasa cannot resist it when he starts to tell her how much he loves her & appreciates her. He likes to kiss her hand when they're just hanging out even with friends. Everything Reiner does is genuine & that warms her heart everytime.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Reiner would be the first to go out like a light & Mikasa just likes to rest her head on his chest and hear his beating heart & relaxed breathing. Mikasa thinks Reiner's little snores are adorable. But when they're just cuddling on the couch, Mikasa would fall asleep first & Reiner would carry her to the bed.

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A/N: I had a lot of fun with this & I hope you'll enjoy it too! Thank you so much for the support & love 💖 xoxo More asks to come!

#ReiKasa #ReiKasa ask game #ReiKasa headcanons #ReiKasaverse #ReiKasa modern au #reiner x mikasa #reiner braun #mikasa ackerman #snk headcanons #aot headcanons #ReiKasa reimagines #ReiKasa sexy headcanons

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paodequeijofeliz-blog · 4 years

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The Mother of My Child

Bloodbound Fanfiction (characters and main story belongs to Pixelberry Studios).

Pairing: Kamilah Sayeed and MC (Annie)

Information: this takes place after Bloodbound 3, but I made a few changes. MC is still human, she is only Turned after they have a daughter. It came from a request, so it won’t be long, probably two parts, but I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: there’s a little bit of NSFW in the middle, but not much. The rest is fluff.

Part 2 (Finale)

The Mother of My Child - Part 1

Kamilah Sayeed was always overprotective regarding her wife. She thought humans to be so fragile, so easy to brake. And now there wasn’t just Annie to keep safe, but two! A tiny one was growing inside the woman she loved. Every night, the Vampire would slide her hands inside her wife’s shirt just to check if that little heart was still beating there, safe and sound. The baby was only eleven weeks by now, so the belly was barely showing any evidence. She liked to caress the skin slowly, feeling that small “elevation” while listening to Annie’s muffled happy sleeping sounds. Kamilah had never felt so filled with love in her entire life.

And so tired as well.

It wasn’t just about protecting her humans. Now it was also about keeping her wife pleased. If she thought Annie had a weird taste for food before, things got to a wild place Kamilah never believed to be possible.

“Lettuce with… Caramel? Are you sure?” the Vampire had the phone on her ear, walking through the aisles of a 24/7 supermarket at 3 a.m. “No, no, I am not judging! Not at all. Never. Don’t cry. My tone is not harsh. I promise. I love you. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

She hung up the phone, lowering her eyes to the shopping cart filled with the most random selection of items. That was just the beginning. Soon enough those quick runs to the shops in the middle of the night became a thing. Annie couldn’t sleep, suffering from insomnia, which led her to crave for different stuff all the time.

“Kami…” the woman rolled in bed, hugging the Vampire from behind. Her voice was soft and sweet, like a kid about to ask for something their parents wouldn’t normally allow. “Are you awake?”

“Of course. What is it?” she sighed, turning to find those puppy eyes in the dark.

“I can’t sleep.”

“Are you hungry?”

“Thirsty. I want something.” Annie bit her lip, uneasy. “I don’t want to cause you more trouble…”

“Nonsense, darling. Whatever you want, you get. Tell me.”

“I want a black cow.”

“A… What?”

“A black cow. It’s chocolate milkshake with coke and chocolate syrup. Oooh put whipped cream on it too if you can! And cinnamon.”

Kamilah nodded, making a few notes on her phone. She always took her wife’s desires very seriously. And not only the food ones. After a couple weeks, Annie slowly started craving for something else. The Vampire noticed they were reaching another level when she suddenly walked in the office to find her half-naked wife sitting on the chair.

“Are you out of your mind? My assistant could’ve walked in and caught you like this!” Kamilah dropped the papers on the desk, eyes roaming over the woman’s body. That was such a nice set of dark blue lingerie. How to be mad at a gorgeous woman wearing lingerie?

Annie just shook her shoulders, an unconcerned laugh escaping her lips. “And? She would just get a quick glance of what you see every day.”

“I’m not a woman of sharing. Especially this view.” The Vampire was leaning in her direction, one hand already coming up between the woman’s thighs.

Kamilah particularly loved this new phase. She never knew when or how would Annie tease her, only that it would happen a few times every day. Once, during a conference, her phone buzzed and there was a message with a naked photo of her wife touching herself at home. In less than ten minutes, the Vampire was walking in the Penthouse, throwing the blazer and shoes on the floor as running down the hallway.

“Oh my, I didn’t think you’d really come ho…” Annie gasped when Kamilah suddenly pulled her by the waist, lifting her hips at the same time she leaned in to take a taste of her pussy. Soon enough, the human found out how photos worked well on the Vampire. One picture of her dripping wet, legs opened, and Kamilah would completely lose her mind, abandoning anything at work to go home.

“You have been so insatiable.” her eyes were a sparkling tone of red, a finger still rubbing Annie’s clit.

“Yes, and you’re loving it.” She moved her hips closer, wanting more. “Don’t stop, please…”

“As you wish.” Kamilah lowered her face again, sliding the tongue back to teasing and tasting until Annie would finally cum in her mouth. One more time.

From all the different effects the pregnancy was having on the human, just one of them was proving to be truly challenging. The weird food craving was easy to solve. The high sex drive, even better. Insomnia wasn’t funny, but Kamilah could stay awake for a long period without feeling tired, so Annie was never alone during it. Even the mood swifts were easy to deal. The sudden crying over insecurities could be fixed with a few kind words and a tight hug. Nothing would calm her wife more than holding the woman between her arms, letting her breath and let it all out. The Vampire was not very patient before, but for Annie, she could improve as much as needed.

“Evening, my love.” Kamilah walked in the bedroom with calm steps, not sure what to expect after what she saw in the kitchen, but her wife only looked over the shoulders with a calm expression on her face. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine. I had an issue earlier. But now it’s all good.”

“I see. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I lost it.”

The Vampire froze, eyes suddenly searching for Annie’s belly, hearing sharpening… But the heartbeats were still there. Firm. Healthy.

“Darling, you didn’t, I can hear the baby. It’s okay. What made you think that? Was there blood in your underwear? Let’s go to the doctor! Now. Just to be sure.”

“Huh? No, not the baby. The game. Lily won. But she cheated!”

Kamilah pinched the bridge of her nose, slowly calming herself. “You could have started the sentence with that information.”

“Did you hear the part where SHE CHEATED?”

“Yes, what a crime. I’ll have her grounded for a week without videogames.”

“Two.”

The Vampire laughed at her pouting. “Alright, two.”

“Sorry about the broken plates.” She opened such an angelic smile it was hard to picture that short sweet woman in rage throwing plates across the room.

“Don’t worry about those. I’m glad nothing bad happened. I don’t mind if this entire house is broken apart, as long as you and our child are safe.”

Annie’s eyes filled with tears. “I love you so much, goddammit.”

Kamilah loved her back. With the same intensity and devotion.

That’s why the hardest part proved to be the morning sickness. The only thing the Vampire couldn’t fix. She wasn’t able to make it better by buying stuff, listening or hugging. Nothing could make it go away, and Annie was having such a hard time with it. Every single morning, around 7 a.m., the woman would rush into the bathroom and puke. The first time was quick, but it always happened again after breakfast. Kamilah couldn’t leave for work until making sure her wife was feeling better. For this entire time, she would sit behind Annie, holding her hair and painfully watching her small features shaking with convulsions.

“Breath, darling. I’m here.” She whispered, arms holding her close.

“You shouldn’t feel guilty, Kami.” Annie relaxed against her chest, finally feeling some relief after an entire hour of puking and coughing.

“What are you talking about?”

“I know that’s why you’re so overprotective with us. I love how much you care, babe. But I don’t want you feeling guilty all the time. It’s not your fault you couldn’t do it.” The woman looked up to meet her gaze, finding a glimpse of sadness in those beautiful brown eyes. “We chose it together. I wanted to get pregnant.”

“What if you had a choice?” Kamilah hid her nose between her wife’s curls. There was a hint of concern on her tone. “What if I could get pregnant too? Would you still want to do it?”

“Yes. I would.” She was smiling. An innocent and happy smile. “I promise you. I chose it because I wanted things to happen this way. You have nothing to feel guilty about.”

The Vampire caressed her wife’s belly over the nightdress, enjoying that silence for a moment. The feeling of Annie fitting in her arms, the sound of the baby’s heart. They were already halfway through the pregnancy, so the small kicks would happen every now and then, especially when she was humming a song on her wife’s ears or playing the piano in the living room.

Things couldn’t be happier.

It didn’t matter how many times Annie would tell her to calm down and not overthink the situation, it was Kamilah’s nature to worry. She wanted to have everything under control, as the months started to go by faster and faster. The baby was growing strong, with all the exams pointing to a healthy child. Kamilah planned every single step about the birth, prepared for any surprises.

But not even The Vampire Queen could control when and how a baby comes.

Nobody expected it to be like that.

Tagging @kamilahismyqueen cause she’s sweet and asked to 💛

#choices: stories you play #kamilah x mc #kamilah sayeed #choices: bb #choices kamilah #I'm sorry anon it got too big to be just one part so I had to leave the birth for a second part #I hope you like it #I didn't read again so if there's a huge mistake message me and I fix it hehe

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trensu · 4 years

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Episode 50: The One with the Greatest Family Reunion(s) of All Time

so we start the ep with nhs's truly oscar-worthy performance which results in jgy getting stabbed

And i cheer for both the performance AND the stabbing!!!

lxc has his eyes closed bc that's his coping mechanism when times get tough

lol lxc is like I TOLD YOU I WASN'T GONNA HOLD BACK IF YOU DID ONE MORE BAD THING

and jgy is like i know!! that's why i haven't done one more bad thing!!!!

everyone's faces are like sure jan

but then they look at nhs like, wait a minute...

jgy is like why are you looking at him? you're not gonna see anything! i didn't see anything all these years and i'm smarter and sneakier than all of you!!!

okay, he didn't say that last part but it was def implied

jgy: nhs, good for you. i didn't expect that you would be my downfall.

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQ--uhhh, NIE HUAISANG!!

nhs hasn't broken character either! He needs to join a theater troupe or smth with those skills.

blah blah lxc and jgy are having Feelings blah blah blah lxc is conflicted blah

hm, those Feelings are becoming rather Dramatique

ugh jgy just let it go and die already

jgy: have I ever done you wrong?

UM?? how about KILLING his little brother's soulmate?

which resulted in him having to watch his little brother suffer extreme physical punishment and then grieve for years after??

PRETTY SURE THAT HURT LXC QUITE A LOT

Jgy: now you won't even give me a chance to live?

I THINK THE FUCK NOT!!!

oh we're getting some not so great special effects and jgy drags lxc to the coffin and then bleeds all over it, gross

ooooh, the Temple of Doom is starting to fall apart

lwj makes a move towards lxc but wwx grabs his arm and stops him!

bc it's dangerous to get too close and wwx is protective of his soulmate!!

jc starts the evacuation bc hello the building is crumbling and he gets everyone out except the lan bros, wwx and jgy

Jgy: stay and die with me

FUCK YOU JGY

but lxc was ready and willing to do that, so jgy shoves him back bc why the hell not

(we're gonna ignore how awkward that particular maneuver was, we already know special effects are not a priority in this show)

Jgy's like lets emotionally torment lxc some more, just for kicks, bc I'm an ASSHOLE

lwj catches his brother and he is Concerned.

Eventually our lan bros and wwx flee the temple and jgy has one last meltdown before getting crushed LIKE THE MAGGOT HE IS

Now we cut to a shot of all our crew standing outside

and we see my bratty son slowly fall to his knees with a look of UTTER SORROW AND PAIN ON HIS FACE

Bc he was BETRAYED by his nice uncle

MY POOR SON!!

we get reaction shots from wwx and the lan bros

(wwx continues to be beautiful even when sad)

oh, now lxc and nhs are having a moment sitting on the steps of the temple

lxc asks nhs if jgy really had made a move

nhs is like, you questioning me is making me doubt everything! idk idk!!

even amidst his grief he takes a moment to be completely exasperated by NHS's catchphrase lolol

now we cut to wwx sitting on a different set of stairs, carefully fiddling with his demon flute and he looks up to see jc watching him and HE SMILES

BC THAT'S HIS LITTLE BROTHER!!

AND THEY'RE ALL STILL MIRACULOUSLY ALIVE AFTER THAT HOT MESS!!

oooh, he's unwrapping his sleeve and we get a flash of his bare forearm

how scandalous! you're gonna give lwj vapors, wwx

We see the very last cut on his arm fade away bc finally mxy has been avenged

AND WWX SMILES AGAIN!!

cut to jc and jl watching wwx smile

bc i mean, who wouldn't be captivated by wwx's smile?

PEOPLE YOU CAN'T TRUST, THAT'S WHO

none of the sect leaders before were captivated by that smile AND LOOK WHAT HAPPENED!!!

oh that smile didn't stick around for long bc we hear barking!!

wwx gets this panicked wide-eyed expression that mAKES ME WANNA HIDE HIM AND PROTECT HIM FROM THE WORLD

But I also don't want to get murdered by LWJ's death glare so I'll just let him hide and protect wwx...

omg my bratty son looks SO HAPPY and shouts "fairy!!" before running towards his doggy friend

i'm not much of a dog person, tbh, but MY BRATTY SON IS SO HAPPY

and fairy did bring a whole crew of cultivators...

too little too late, some smart spiritual dog he is, lololol

we've got lan disciples, and jiang disciples and all these people swarming around our crew, fussing over them.

it's kind of sweet except i notice that no one's approached my bratty son

he is, in fact, ALL ALONE with fairy and i am OFFENDED on his behalf

not that my bratty son seems to mind

he's too wrapped up in his doggy reunion to notice BUT I NOTICED SO I'LL BE OFFENDED ENOUGH FOR THE BOTH OF US

wwx is smiling as he sees lwj and jc being fussed over by their respective disciples

so cute so CUTE, I love his smiles so much

lwj stands up and greets his uncle with a stately bow

god he's elegant and regal af, how the hell does he do it

but his uncle's a douchebag and barely acknowledges him before turning to leave and lwj watches him go, kind of hurt, kind of surprised

ooooh, now we get a shot of jc watching wwx as he gets questioned by oyzz

Oyzz is like what happened? Are you hurt? Is everyone okay??

and we can see wwx is still smiling!! BC MY BOY IS MADE OF SUNSHINE OKAY

awwwww

jl looks up with an ADORABLE smile on his face and tells fairy to wait outside

HE TAKES FAIRY OUTSIDE BC HE KNOWS WWX IS AFRAID OF DOGS!!!

My bratty son is actually very sweet!!

jc starts to leave the scene (and it's only until now that he stops staring at wwx btw) and wwx watches him go 😔

cut to a shot of lwj blatantly staring at wwx as per usual

wwx looks up and meets his gaze

they get lost in each other for a bit bc when DON'T they?

We’re at the steps of the temple again and we see nhs pick up jgy's crumpled up hat looking all contemplative

oops, nhs's fingers come away from the hat all tacky with blood, yuck

cut to my bratty son running back into the temple where all the cultivators are inspecting stuff and he asks ljy where wwx is

HE'S ASKING AFTER MY SUNSHINE BOY!

Y'know, his not-evil, not-angry uncle?

ljy tells him that he and hanguang jun left after they brought them lil apple

lol, the idea of ljy and oyzz dragging lil apple along just to return him to wwx cracks me up

jl tells ljy to take care of fairy for him before he dashes off to find his new uncle

BUT JC STOPS HIM?? "don't chase after them"

look at jc being all Cool leaning against that tree

in his fashionable robes

with his awesome sword tucked in the crook of his elbow

jl throws one last glance at the direction wwx and lwj left, and then joins jc under the tree

jc is like, they're long gone kid

jl: so that's it? you're letting them leave just like that??

jc: what else? invite them to stay for dinner? say thank you and then i am sorry??

lol, he's working himself up into a snit already

But also, like, MY BRATTY SON HAS A GOOD HEART, OKAY??

he just hides it under bluster bc he's sensitive and people are mean to him all the time!

HE WANTED TO CONNECT WITH WWX (AND MAYBE LWJ??) NOW THAT THIS WAS ALL OVER

AND HE WOULD'VE DONE IT IF NOT FOR JC BEING ALL HUNG UP ON HIS ISSUES STILL

not that i hold that against jc, that's a lot of emotional trauma he's gotta work through

LOL JL IS NOT GONNA LET HIMSELF BE COWED BY HIS UNCLE BC WHEN DOES HE EVER?

JL: it was exactly bc of the way you were acting that they took off! you're such a pain in the neck!!

AND THEN HE POUTS AND FALLS INTO A CROUCH WITH HIS ARMS CROSSED AND STARTS SULKING UP A STORM

I LOVE MY BRATTY SON SO MUCH

JC: IS THAT HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SPEAK TO YOUR ELDERS? ARE YOU ASKING TO GET DISCIPLINED??

these two crack me up every time, i swear

but the whole corporal punishment is...problematic

jc raises his arm to smack jl and jl ducks and raises his own arm to block the blow and i'm sitting here like, yikes

but then we get a shot of jc's open palm, out of focus with a crisp backdrop of red leaves from the tree they're under

and his hand is just held there, stilled for just a moment before the fingers start to gently curl inward and the strike never happens (thank god)

jc: lets go home, jin ling. let everyone go back to the place where they belong

he walks off with jin ling springing to his feet and chasing after him a beat later

jl: was there something you wanted to say to wwx?

have i mentioned i love my bratty son? BECAUSE I DO. A LOT.

jc: no, there isn't.

jl: bullshit!

I LOVE HIM!! WHAT A MOUTHY BRAT 💜

JL: i saw it with my own eyes! you wanted to talk to wwx! but you didn't say a word just now or back in the temple!

jc: there is nothing to say

jl: bullshit! you had something to say!

while this entire exchange is happening we see jc marching ahead, not looking at jl at all, but jl is walking backwards eyes pinned to his face the entire time

bc my son might be a brat but he's also pretty observant and he KNOWS his uncle

AND NOW WE GET A FLASHBACK

WE GET A BIG REVEAL

we're back at “the ones where we gross sob FOREVER”

and wwx is telling jc to stay put at the inn while he goes to get food and meds

his voice all weak and tremulous

but jc steps out of the inn for a moment after wwx leaves

AND SEES THAT THE WEN FLUNKIES CAUGHT SIGHT OF HIS BROTHER!!

they were like three feet away from grabbing his big brother

and he says internally, "take care. i'm leaving jyl in your hands"

AND I'M CRYING BC THEY'RE PLAYING THAT MUSIC

THAT SWEET TENDER MUSIC THEY PLAY WHENEVER JYL AND HER BROTHERS HAVE A MOMENT

Jc goes and causes a distraction and lets himself be caught by the wens

SO THAT HIS BIG BROTHER AND BIG SISTER COULD STAY SAFE

I'M CRYING I'M CRYING

MY YUNMENG SIBS, MY POOR YUNMENG SIBS!!

WHY DID THEY HAVE TO SUFFER SO??

WHY WERE THEY SO DAMN SELF-SACRIFICING???

WHY THE HELL COULDN'T THEY LEARN TO COMMUNICATE BETTER???

cut back to the present, and jc's eyes are welled up with tears

he has a hurt little smile on his face, he says, "take care"

softly, mostly to himself

after a moment, he turns to jin ling and says "lets go"

and we watch them leave

I just want them all to be a BIG HAPPY FAMILY DAMN IT

cut to the next scene, we hear ~THEIR SONG~ start playing in the background all slow and soft

i love the overhead shot we get of them surrounded by the gorgeous foliage, it's so peaceful

As wwx and lwj walk slowly and at ease with lil apple between them

AND MY HEART FEELS SO TENDER AND FULL OMG

lwj: wei ying

he says it all seriously. wwx looks at him and he's got A BIG SMILE ON HIS FACE

bc he's looking at his soulmate!!!

who wouldn't smile when looking at their soulmate???

he's cheerfully twirling his flute bc finally all is right in the world!

the mystery is solved, his loved ones are safe

and he's traveling with lwj and lil apple

nothing could be better!

wwx: whats up?

lwj is pointedly not looking at him

lwj: there is something that I…

and here he stops in his tracks, and wwx stops with him

lwj: i didn't tell you.

wwx gets all playful and leans on lil apple, and waggles his demon flute and lwj

wwx: what is it?

Look at that mischievous grin!!

he's all prepared to tease the heck out of lwj for whatever he's about to say LOL

but they're interrupted!!

wen ning and lan sizhui are running after them and wwx notices

LOLOL

His face scrunches up and he mutters under his breath like, damn it! every time!! these two are fast!

wwx: sizhui, why are you following us? aren't you afraid of old master lan calling you out?

MY SUNSHINE BOY IS SMILING SO MUCH THIS EPISODE, I'M SO HAPPY!!!

lsz: i have something important to ask you!

he's all out of breath!

wwx turns to look at lwj eyes wide and curious before going back to lsz

wwx: what is it?

lsz goes on to explain how he's been remembering things but he's unsure of stuff so he wanted to ask them about it

wwx looks confused and glances at lwj

lwj just looks back at him briefly before his eyes flick down

wwx: what is it that you want to know?

lsz looks down and, like, gathers up the strength needed for this next line of questioning.

with the sweetest smile, and the softest eyes he starts listing stuff

like how he knew a cocky chef who was actually a terrible cook

(wwx laughs confusedly at this)

and how that man planted him in a field and told him he'd grow faster with some watering and sunlight

AND WE GET A FLASHBACK OF LITTLE A-YUAN PLOPPED IN THE DIRT GETTING BURIED BY WWX

he goes on to say how that man would play with him

and how he had invited hunguang jun for a meal and then didn't pick up the tab so hanguang jun had to pay

There we get a flashback to their meal at the yiling wine house!

we cut back to the present and WWX'S FACE IS STUNNED, EYES WELLING UP WITH TEARS, AND LSZ IS GETTING CHOKED UP AS HE TELLS HIM THINGS

AND WWX'S BREATHING GETS SHAKY

BC LSZ TELLS HIM HIS SURNAME IS WEN

wwx blinks rapidly, not believing what he's hearing

wwx: wen was your surname? isn't lan your surname?

wwx: lan sizhui, lan yuan.. A-yuan?

AND OH GOD HIS FACE, HIS FACE

His eyebrows are furrowed

His eyes are full of tears!

he's looking at lsz like this has to be a dream bc it's too good to be true

Lsz nods jerkily

AND I'M TRYING TO HOLD BACK TEARS

HOW THE HELL IS LWJ WATCHING THIS ALL GO DOWN WITHOUT CRYING??

he's watching his son so intently

he's seeing his two most precious people reunite

and there are no tears??

I DON'T UNDERSTAND

HE'S VERY OBVIOUSLY MOVED BY THIS BUT NOT CRYING

MEANWHILE MY FACE IS A FREAKING RIVER OF EMOTION

lsz: i...i am a-yuan

and his voice all cracked with feeling

wwx huffs and is still shaky

wwx: didn't a-yuan pass away already?

he's thought his kid was dead this whole time

MY HEART, MY HEART

lwj had been staring at lsz this whole time but when he hears wwx say that, his gaze drops to the ground

HE FEELS ASHAMED (AS HE SHOULD BE!!) BC HE DIDN'T TELL WWX SOONER

wwx turns to lwj, hope and tentative joy in his voice

wwx: lan zhan, was it you?

lwj meets his gaze and says yes, his voice steady and firm

lwj: this was the thing i haven't told you about

Yeah, i know, i’ve been YELLING AT YOU ABOUT IT THIS WHOLE TIME

and wwx looks back at lsz, breath choppy and lsz flings himself into wwx's arms!!!

I AM SOBBING

lsz: i really missed you, i really missed you

THEY'RE BOTH CRYING AND CLINGING TO EACH OTHER SO HARD

OH GOD I NEED TISSUES

wwx laughs and sniffles

wwx: silly boy, why are you crying?

AS IF YOUR FACE ISN'T STREAMING WITH TEARS, WWX

lsz pulls back and scrubs his face in his sleeve

lsx: i wasn't crying. i was just feeling really sad and yet thrilled at the same time

YOU TWO STOP DENYING YOUR TEARS

IF I HAVE TO SIT IN A PUDDLE OF MY TEARS THEN YOU HAVE TO OWN UP TO YOUR OWN TEARS, YOU HEAR ME??

lsz: i couldn't put it into words

lwj: then don't

pffft, ofc lwj would be the one advocating for LESS WORDS lololol

wwx laughs at that

wwx: that's right. no need to say anything

then he starts his theatrics, bc he wouldn't be wwx without his theatrics

he leans on lil apple and rubs his own shoulder

wwx: damn, you little ones are strong, you are indeed a student of hanguang jun

he looks at lwj and points his demon flute at him

HE'S SO HAPPY

lwj: he is a student of yours as well

omg lwj delivers this line so sincerely

like, there was barely a pause between what wwx and what lwj responded with

he's so freaking earnest

LOL wwx straightens up at that and reaches for lsz

wwx: no wonder he is such a handsome boy!

Wwx, you are SHAMELESS

He giggles as he pats lsz’s face, it’s freaking adorable

lsz: master wei didn't teach me anything!

wow lsz, you've had your other dad back for all of five minutes and you're already sassing him?

he truly is wwx's son lol

wwx: i did! it was bc you were so little and you forgot

You’re sounding a bit defensive there, wwx...

lsz: yes, i seem to recall. i remember now

wwx immediately starts preening

wwx: you see. i've mentored him!

lsz: for example, switching the portrait of a beauty into--

wwx slams his hand over lsz's mouth, HIS FACE IS A PICTURE OF PANIC

LOLOLOL

lwj's eyes have widened slightly and developed an edge of Judgement

wn peeks at lwj out of the corner of his eyes like he's trying to gauge his reaction or smth lolol

wwx laughs awkwardly and takes his hand off lsz's mouth to shake a finger at him, wearing a tight smile on his face

lsz: and when a pretty lady passes by--

wwx: NONSENSE!!!

LOL I'M D Y I N G

wwx shouts this at the TOP OF HIS LUNGS to drown out lsz

he whirls on him pointing an accusatory finger and marches towards him as lsz scrambles back

wwx: nonsense! how come you're remembering these kinds of things? how could i teach little kids these things?

LOL HE'S TALKING SO FAST

lsz: you did! wen ning can testify!

wow, way to throw your uncle under the bus, lsz

kids these days have no filial piety!

wwx: there's nothing for wen ning to testify!

OMG WN AND LWJ IN THE BACKGROUND 🤣🤣🤣

as soon as lsz draws attention to him, wn looks at lsz like WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?

and lwj side-eyes wen ning SO HARD, like what the hell did you let wwx teach my son?

wwx: stop talking nonsense! i am telling you, little boy. lan zhan, what did you teach him?

AND WE GET THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SHOT OF LWJ HERE

as soon as wwx turns to him with his wild accusations, lwj gets this delightfully crooked smile on his face

and he looks down as if there's TOO MUCH JOY IN HIS HEART that he can't bear to watch for long

GOD THIS IS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE.

and this marks, what, THE THIRD? the third time lwj smiles in public, all OUT IN THE OPEN?

I'M DYING, I'M DYING

wwx: when a-yuan was little and with me, he was a good boy!

lsz: it's the truth!

wwx: nonsense!

wwx: do you see that pit? no matter how big you've become, i will still plant you into that pit. understand?

lsz has a big grin on his face

wwx: what are you laughing at? you dumb boy!

AND THEN LSZ DROPS TO THE GROUND AND HUGS WWX'S LEG LIKE HE USED TO WHEN HE WAS A TODDLER

AND EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL IN THE WORLD

wwx laughs to himself and lwj still has a small smile playing across his lips as he watches his son

wwx: a-yuan, you are too old for this

AS IF HE'S NOT LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT

wwx: do you remember, you used to grab hanguang jun's leg when you were little, just like this?

so many wonderful flashbacks of little a-yuan clinging to his parents’ legs!!

oh god, oh god, my heart, my heart is going to explode from all the tender feelings!! Look at their faces

wwx's mouth slowly curls into a smile before it grows INTO A FLASH OF HIS SQUINTY-EYED SMILE

you know the one!

the one that stretches SO BIG WITH HAPPINESS IT LIGHTS UP THE WHOLE WORLD?? YEAH, THAT ONE

and then we cut to lwj's face

he has the softest expression on his face

he's got this gentle, tiny smile, the slightest of curves at the corners of his mouth

and in his eyes are SO FULL OF LOVE AND WARMTH as he watches his soulmate smile at him with their son clinging to his soulmate's leg

AND I MUST'VE DIED AND GONE TO THE GOOD PLACE BC THIS IS JUST TOO BEAUTIFUL TO BE REAL

now we cut to a different scene, lwj and lsz are in the background have some sort of father-son chat, while wwx and wn chill in the foreground

here we find out that wn and lsz plan to go back to qishan to build some sort of memorial to their loved ones

wwx: i'll come with you

wn: that won't be necessary

wwx: you don't want me to tag along?

aw, my sunshine boy looks kinda hurt 😔

but wn assures him that that's not the case. it's just that wwx has already done more than enough for them and it's time for wen ning to go out on his own

wwx gets all teary-eyed again and pats him on the shoulder, and agrees that that's for the best

lsz and wn split off, and wwx waves his demon flute cheerfully at them, lwj at his side

wwx turns to lwj with a smile

wwx: lan zhan, lets go!

he says happily, with confidence, then he taps chenqing on his head a couple of times

wwx: where should we go?

he grins, pulling lil apple along with him, so cheerfully!

wwx: let's get going, lil apple!

but lwj isn't turning with him

he's still in that spot, his back towards wwx who already was forging onto his next adventure

AND MY HEART IS BREAKING

BC WHY HASN'T HE TURNED TO FOLLOW WWX???

wwx slows to a stop as he notices the absence of white robes at his side AND ~THEIR SONG~ STARTS PLAYING AGAIN

he turns back slowly to look back at lwj, confused

there is too much distance between them!!

TOO MUCH!

multiple yards of distance where there should be NONE!

THERE SHOULD BE NONE DISTANCE!!!!!!

WHY ISN'T THERE NONE DISTANCE??!?!

lwj is still facing away from wwx, he's still rooted to the spot and his face has gone blank

wwx: lan zhan, you...aren't you coming with me?

HE SOUNDS SO CONFUSED, SO TIMID

HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT'S HAPPENING

and there's a too long pause during which wwx's eyes are desperately pinned to lwj's back

finally, FINALLY, lwj turns ever so slowly to face wwx

wwx is staring at him and lwj can only meet his eyes briefly before they slowly turn downwards

wwx gets this tiny hurt smile on his face and nods as his eyes well with tears again but this time THEY ARE NOT HAPPY TEARS

these are "i knew this was too good to be true" tears

these are "of course i can't keep good, pure lan zhan at my side" tears

these are "this is exactly what i deserve" tears

lwj looks up again, and wwx gives him a nod and a smile bc he doesn't want lwj to feel guilty for leaving him

LEAVING HIM

HE'S LEAVING HIM AGAIN

WHY

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING

the camera pulls out, really emphasizing the distance and the sudden quiet that falls between them is severely lacking any words of explanation

AND I'M SCREAMING INTERNALLY BC WTF WHY

we cut to a truly impressive shot of the cloud recesses, followed by a cut to a waterfall

I’m pretty sure it's the same waterfall from when they were kids and had that sword fight

and we hear the opening notes of ~Their Song~ played on the flute

wwx walks into view on the shore of the pond the waterfall goes into, with his flute at his lips

in the background we see that lwj is at the opposite shore closer to the waterfall, sitting cross-legged with his guqin in his lap

AND THEN THEY GIVE US VOCALS

bc watching them play ~THEIR SONG~ TOGETHER BUT AT A DISTANCE WASN'T PAINFUL ENOUGH

and jfc the shots of the waterfalls in this area are freaking gorgeous

now we see them standing together on the same boulder over a smaller waterfall

bc our boys have an aesthetic

that aesthetic is moonlight and waterfalls, and they're sticking to it

wwx: lan zhan, tbh, it surprised me that you would take over the role of his excellency

lwj: we made a vow here

and we get a flashback to the lantern scene and hear those vows they made as kids

Back in the present, wwx smiles, and knocks back the jar of wine that he has with him bc the mystery has been solved BUT HIS ALCOHOLISM HASN'T!

and i'm sitting here SCREAMING INTERNALLY, FUCK THOSE VOWS.

YOU'VE GOT NEW, BETTER VOWS, WHICH ARE NEVER EVER LEAVE EACH OTHER'S SIDES EVER AGAIN, DAMN IT

wwx turns to face lwj

wwx: lan zhan, you truly deserve your title, hanguang jun

and lwj turns to look back at him

lwj: and you too, wei ying

we are BLESSED with wwx's wide, squinty-eyed smile

and lwj graces us with his soft, small, secret smile

they stare at each other for a moment before turning back to gaze off into the distance

the camera pulls back to gift us with the gorgeous scenery that surrounds them

now we cut to them walking down the steps towards that big rock full of ridiculous gusulan rules

nhs is there! with his fan!

nhs: this is unexpected. cloud recesses has added another thousand rules.

wwx: nhs, no matter how many rules are added, there is one that matters most. do you know what it is?

nhs looks so at ease here

this entire time since we got back to the present to watch wwx solve this mystery, nhs was nervous, twitchy and flaky in every scene

but here, he stands straight and serene with a confidence we have not yet seen on him til now

nhs: i have no clue

he says this and it doesn't sound anything like his usual anxious, dopey, "idk idk i really don't know"

nhs: please advise, wwx.

and wwx strides up until he's right next to nhs, shoulder to shoulder, tho they're facing opposite directions

wwx: that would be...

he leans down, and lowers his voice

wwx: "thou shall not befriend the devil"

there has been a distinct lack of background noise or music since this scene started

but the minute those words leave wwx's mouth, we get ominous music.

nhs keeps his harmless act as he meets wwx's eyes and they share a laugh

(a laugh of acknowledgement, of recognition of each other's skills)

nhs: wwx, you have the nerve

wwx: no i wouldn't dare. i'm no match for you.

the words they're exchanging SOUND carefree and easy on the surface, but they definitely carry some underlying tension

nhs notices lwj watching them and bows respectfully

nhs: your excellency

he turns to leave, fan open against his chest

wwx: clan leader nie, i have one question that i would love to get your opinion on.

nhs: go on

wwx: you have put in so much effort and energy, don't you want to be the Excellency?

wwx is gauging nhs's threat level to lwj

bc with the skills nhs has developed and the cover he has, it really wouldn't be all that difficult for him to depose lwj if he wanted, you know?

but nhs has never been the ambitious sort

he was perfectly content with his art, and his fans, and his porn, and being second young master, nothing more (UNTIL FUCKING JGY RUINED IT ALL)

nhs: wwx, it was once said that we can never get tired of these scenes; earth and sky, woods and fields, lakes and rivers, the mountain and the sea

nhs: as for me, i am a sensible man. if i have to, i always do it myself.

nhs: but for the things that aren't my business, i won't meddle in

and i'm not sure if there's something i'm missing, some layer of context or whatever,

but what i get from this is that nhs is saying everything has its place and he has no desire to go outside of his own place in the world

if the situation calls for it, he will intervene but ONLY if there's no one else willing or able to step in

really, this is just his poetic way of saying, i have no interest in hurting hanguang jun or stealing his power

lwj walks up to join wwx as the two of them watch nhs leave

lwj: aren't you going to ask him?

wwx: ask him what?

wwx: who let mxy out? who released the blade spirit? who found sisi and bicao? and who wrote that anonymous letter?

and he gets this unconcerned expression on his face

with a little pout he just goes on to say that these questions don't matter anymore

and he walks off, twirling his flute

we cut to the next scene and our boys are standing face to face on a grassy hilltop. wwx points behind lwj

Brief aside to say, i love the robes lwj wears here, they’re very very pretty. White and pale blue, they look very airy and light

wwx: i will head that way

and lwj points with bichen behind wwx

lwj: i will head this way

AND THEN THEY JUST STARE AT EACH OTHER FOR A BIT

BC THEY DON'T REALLY WANNA SAY GOODBYE, DO THEY?

lwj: have you decided where you are going to go?

wwx shakes his head and tilts his chin up

wwx: it's a big world that we live in. i will wander with my fine wine and a ride, and make it my home

*cries softly* but you have a home, LWJ is your home, why are you leaving

lwj lowers his gaze

probs bc he is thinking the same thing i was

let lwj be your home, wwx

wwx: lan zhan, i will get going

and lwj gives him one single, barely there nod of the head

bc he doesn't want wwx to go!!!

but he doesn't want to hold him back either...

wwx walks past him with a smile, dragging lil apple along with him and cheerfully he says:

"as long as the sea is bound to wash up on the sand and stars are above you, we will meet again."

and lwj just watches him leave before steeling himself to turn and walk off to his wwx-less future

but as he walks, he hears wwx playing their song on his flute so he pauses to turn back slightly

and we hear wwx’s voice over, "lan zhan, next time we see each other, you better have a name for this song."

as lwj continues walking, we hear his voice over, "way ahead of you."

and he seems slightly less sad at their parting.

AND NOW WE'RE GETTING THE FUCKING VOCALS AGAIN BC THE SHOW JUST LOVES TEARING OUR HEARTS OUT OF OUR CHEST

we get a gorgeous shot of a green cliff side and of course the cliffside has a couple of pretty waterfalls

wwx standing alone, playing on his flute, and the camera is lovingly caressing all of wwx's best features

we get a beautiful close up of wwx's lips resting over the mouthpiece of his flute, aND I THANK EVERY DEITY IN EXISTENCE FOR IT

and it's not immediately apparent bc wwx always wears dark form fitting robes

but the robes he's wearing in this scene are DEFINITELY DIFFERENT from the ones he was wearing when he and lwj parted ways

MEANING SOME TIME HAS PASSED

we have no way of knowing how much time

COULD BE AN HOUR! COULD BE A DAY! COULD BE A COUPLE OF YEARS!!

WE JUST DON'T KNOW

but time has passed

wwx is playing ~Their Song~ alone on that hill, the vocals are like honey to the ears and they crescendo to give us an overwhelming swell of emotion

the music peeters off until it's just wwx's flute reaching the last notes of ~Their Song~

as he is finishing we hear lwj's voice

"Wei Ying."

wwx freezes, like he's wondering if he imagined that voice

the music is completely gone, everything is utterly silent and wwx's face is completely open as he lowers his flute

a smile starts to curl at his mouth, small and tentative and as he turns around, ~Their Song~ crescendos into existence again

and wwx's smile grows incredulous and relieved and SO FULL OF LOVE AND JOY

I DIE, I DIE!

MY BEAUTIFUL SUNSHINE BOY

and we fade to black

bc that's where it ends

That's it

THAT'S ALL THERE IS, WE MADE IT TO THE END!

IT'S OVER, THERE'S NO MORE. MY LIFE NO LONGER HAS MEANING. OMG I JUST BURST INTO TEARS. WHY IS THIS AFFECTING ME SO MUCH

I KNEW THIS WAS COMING. I'VE SEEN THIS THREE OTHER TIMES ALREADY!! OH GOD OH GOD, I MISS WWX'S FACE ALREADY. GIVE ME BACK MY SUNSHINE BOY, LET ME KEEP HIM FOREVER *SOBS*

Hang on, hang on, just give me a minute. *deep breath* Okay, i’m good, i’m good now.

This show is just...it’s so beautiful in every way except CGI lol and it evokes so many visceral feelings. It’s passionate, is what it is. And not in the sexual way “passionate” has been forced to become. This show is passionate the way passion is supposed to mean: piercing anguish, burning anger, utter devotion...just overwhelming feeling

But most importantly, the passion in this show is intense love:

Platonic love; see how much our main cast gave up to aid their friends and dependents

Familial love; look at the lengths those brothers and sisters went for each other

Romantic love; watch how these two soulmates returned to each other again and again regardless of all the obstacles between them

I honestly can’t think of another show that’s done this so well. I am just so grateful to have been able to watch this show, to have gotten to know these characters even tho it’s raised my standards for future shows to ridiculously high levels

So that’s it! We’ve reached the end of the guide! Now we can go back and re-visit our favorite scenes whenever we want!

Return to Masterpost

#WangXiantics #wangxian #the untamed #cql

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caranfindel · 4 years

Text

Recap/review 15.12: “Galaxy Brain”

Oh, my friends, so many things have happened since we last got together. Most of them bad. But let’s try to forget them and immerse ourselves in our favorite show again, shall we?

THEN: Sammy lost hope (Saaaaaaammmmmm!!!!), Chuck needs to visit his other worlds, and oh. Crap. Kaia. Claire’s wooden response to Kaia’s death, Dark Kaia’s stupid dramatic poses… ugh. I’m not here for any of this. And also, Jack has to do exactly what Billie says if he wants to kill God.

NOW: Four weeks ago. Earth 2. Apparently Radio Shack Shed is still in business in this other world. Maybe because Hillary Clinton is the president. Oh, but things are going to go downhill for Radio Shed, because Chuck just walked in.

I take it you’re unsatisfied with your viewing experience at home?

You have no idea.

Hee!

The friendly Radio Shed employee tries to interest Chuck in his giant wall o’televisions, but he’s not here for a TV. What is he here for? “An audience. It’s monologue time.” Each of the TVs begins to show scenes from one of Chuck’s worlds, including the interior of the bunker in our world, as he begins his monologue. As we watch Sam’s visions from the other worlds, Chuck complains that he created his one world, created copies, and should be happy. Because he’s gotten what he wants from hundreds of Sams and Deans, and could get more. But the other worlds don’t spark joy like the original Sam and Dean do. “They challenge me. They disappoint me. They surprise me. They’re the ones.” Chuck doesn’t need more. He suddenly realizes he needs less. It’s time to cancel “all the other worlds, the alternate realities, the subplots, the failed spinoffs.” YES, CHUCK, ESPECIALLY THE FAILED SPINOFFS.

Title card!

Sioux Falls. Our version. Jody is examining a dead cow. Alex calls, wanting to know when she’ll be home to eat vegan lasagna. Which sounds nasty. I’ve got nothing against vegan cuisine, but I think taking a dish that’s supposed to be loaded with cheese, and loading it with not-cheese, is a mistake. Just make spaghetti. Jody says she thinks her dead cow is evidence of humans, not monsters. She sees something suspicious in a barn and heads inside, where she is promptly clobbered.

Bunker. Sam’s wearing that orange plaid shirt that fits him just right, although the collar is higher than I’d like, and we’ve discussed my feelings on orange. Whatever TFW is talking about, he doesn’t like it. “Which part?” Dean asks. “Jack’s deal with Death, or the part where she’s got him eating angel hearts?” Yeah, there’s a lot to dislike there. Sam doesn’t think they should trust Billie, and he’s concerned about Jack’s state of mind, considering that he is still soulless, and was in the Empty for months. And I’m sure this was not intentional on the writers’ part, but I like the way this played out. When they first saw Jack, Sam was the one who immediately reached out, because his boy was back, and it wasn’t until later that he thought oh, things might be fucked up. Dean, on the other hand, immediately had his guard up, and took a moment before he decided it was okay and accepted Jack. This feels true to the characters and I like it. But as I said, I’m sure it’s an accident.

For his part, Jack is wandering the dark rooms of the bunker. He comes across the initials scratched into the table and touches Mary’s, then retreats to his room. Where a strange woman suddenly appears behind him and says she’s answering Jack’s silent prayer to Death, who is busy at the moment.

Meanwhile, Cas says he has some concerns, but Jack trusts Billie and he trusts Jack. And that makes sense. Jack is, what, two years old now? So of course he’s learned who is trustworthy. It’s not like he ever trusted Lucifer or anything like that. Sam reminds them of the required cosmic balance, what with Amara needing to be cancelled out by God. Dean says, having spent time with Billie and visited her library, that he believes in her and her commitment to the rules. He thinks she’s probably got it all figured out.

“Probably?” Sam says. “Like she had the Ma’lak box figured out?” Well, there’s an interesting point. Billie was sure there was only one road that didn’t end in chaotic destruction, and she was wrong. {Or she was lying. Discuss.} But Dean’s still willing to put his faith in her. After all, she was right about Rowena. And it’s the only plan they’ve got, which Sam reluctantly agrees with. Well, he doesn’t agree as much as he just stops arguing.

Skeptical Sam!

Jack is telling his visitor about how he called out to Billie for help with the Grigori, but she didn’t respond. The visitor must be a reaper. She’s a pleasant change from other reapers – a middle-aged woman with gorgeous silver hair and a matronly outfit. She assures Jack that Billie must have known everything would turn out okay, or else she would have stepped in. All Jack has to do is follow Billie’s rules – lie low, wait for instructions, and don’t use your powers under any circumstances, because God might find you. Oooh, what could possibly happen now? Whose life will be in jeopardy, forcing Jack to use his powers?

Approaching Jack’s room, Sam hears him talking to the reaper. Sam knocks on the door and then opens it, which is not cool. {Sidebar: A knock is supposed to say “can I come in,” not “here I come.” You should wait for permission to open the door.} Anyway. When Sam enters, the reaper is gone. Jack claims he was talking to “no one,” and Sam lets that pass. He tells Jack he’s just checking in on him, and stumbles a bit when trying to express how glad they are to have him back. He tells Jack that he could have come to them, even though I’m pretty sure Jack said he couldn’t because he was hiding from God, but that was so long ago that I’ve forgotten. But let’s concentrate on the important part of this conversation. Sam’s face.

He’s awkward and endearing and I adore him.

Dean and Cas are sharing a decanter of whiskey now that Sam’s finally out of their hair. {waves to the Destiel shippers.} Cas explains that he was sure Jack would save the world somehow, and he was “lost” when Jack “died” because he knew Jack’s story couldn’t be done yet. And now, he is absolutely sure that he was right all along. “Here’s to being right,” Dean offers as a toast. He’s also excited about the idea of revenge against Chuck, though Cas says he’s only interested in “Jack fulfilling his destiny.”

Can we just have several minutes of Dean drinking whiskey? Please?

But before Dean can spend a lot of time basking in his anticipated revenge, his phone rings. It’s Jody. Someone’s holding a phone up to her face, so she must be tied up. “Dean, I’m in trouble. Route 11, Fletcher Farm, the old barn. If you don’t come, I’m dead.” Yeah, looks like trouble, all right.

Fletcher Farm. The Impala pulls up next to Jody’s Sheriffmobile. (Aw, typing that makes me miss the Pimpmobile.) It’s just Sam and Dean, though Sam is on the phone with someone when they arrive.

Hello, gorgeous.

The guys find Jody tied up, as predicted, inside the old Fletcher barn. Sam starts to untie her, as Dean conveniently looks the other way and therefore completely misses someone attacking Sam. You will probably not be surprised to hear that this someone is Dark Kaia. She dispatches Sam easily, as people always do when it’s convenient for plot reasons, and gets Dean by the throat. “You have something that belongs to me,” she says. Which, as we know from the Then, is her magic spear. That got broken. Oops. Dean doesn’t care that he promised her he’d get her back to her own world, or that he promised to return the spear, because “that promise expired the minute you hurt our friend.” Although, Dean, you were conveniently ignoring that promise long before Jody got involved, but okay. Luckily, Jody is able to sneak up behind Dark Kaia and hit her with something, allowing Dean and Sam to pull their guns. Yay! {Sidebar: I love Jody, y’all, but that doesn’t mean I want her being the badass instead of Sam.} Sam asks Dark Kaia why she’s so desperate to get back to “that hellhole,” because apparently Sam doesn’t get that your home is your home, even if it’s a hellhole, which makes perfect sense, she said sarcastically.

It turns out the awful orange jacket doesn’t actually match the orange plaid shirt all that well.

Dark Kaia explains that her world is dying, and she knows this because she’s psychically connected to Kaia 1.0. Who is still alive, somehow. Jody feels awful, but Sam and Dean are the ones who didn’t even bother to haul her carcass back through the rift, so. {Sidebar: Coincidentally, I just watched “Defending Your Life.” I wonder if Dean’s feelings of guilt have changed since that episode?}

Bunker. Jack is beating Cas at Connect Four when they hear the creaky door open. {Sidebar: The Husband winces every time he hears the Impala’s squeaky doors. Do the Winchesters not know what WD-40 is?} Sam comes downstairs with Jody, and we have this weird conversation.

Jody!

Hey, Jack, Cas.

Nice to finally meet you in person.

Have Jody and Cas really never met? And if not, why did she casually greet him with “hey, Cas?” Weird. Carrying on. Dean appears with Dark Kaia, who also greets Jack, because I guess she knows him from Kaia 1.0’s dreams or whatever.

Time jump. Cas insists Jack can’t help Dark Kaia, and the guys are like, no shit. But they still want to rescue Kaia 1.0 somehow, so they send Jody into the depths of the bunker to look for something they might not have thought of that can help them jump worlds. Let’s just think about that for a minute. These two, experts in hunting and lore, residents of the bunker for the past 7 years and at least one of them a cataloguer of its contents, who spent a huge part of previous seasons trying to break into a different world and scouring the bunker for anything that would help, think Jody will find something they didn’t?

Oh, for fuck’s sake.

Cas says he’s going to call Sergei to see if he has any more archangel grace. Sergei? Sergei who almost killed Sam recently, and had to be threatened with death to fix what he’d done?

Oh, seriously, for fuck’s sake.

Carrying on. Cas wants archangel grace because, other than Jack, it’s the only thing that’s opened a rift before. And Sam agrees, because both Sam and Cas have forgotten that an angel’s vessel retains some grace which can be extracted after the angel is gone.

Come on, guys. I’m trying, but you’ve got to meet me halfway. And this isn’t even a Buckleming episode.

Shhh. Concentrate on the pretty.

Dark Kaia yells that they’re wasting time, and Jack is right there and could get them to her world right now. “Hey, Not Kaia?” Dean says. “Not helping.” Hee! Jack decides he’ll do research instead, and then they have to decide what they’ll do with Dark Kaia. Jody says “She killed a prize heifer just to get my attention, then she jumped me, beat me up, and threatened to kill me. Do I get a vote?” Oooh, I like Dark Jody.

But the worst thing that happens to Dark Kaia is that they handcuff her to a table and force her to read a fashion magazine. She pretends she’s not interested, hurling it across the table, but sweetie, you’re not fooling anyone. I’m looking at your hair and makeup right now and I can tell you’re into it.

{Sidebar: Is this model supposed to remind her of Claire? Is that why she got upset, because she feels Kaia 1.0’s love for Claire? Discuss.}

Jack throws himself into the research and finds an old Italian spell that requires the liver of a monster which is, unfortunately, extinct because John Winchester killed the last one. Awkward. Dean suggests Jack check on Cas and Jody, and Jack does the oh, because I’m a failure look. The guys are sure they won’t find anything, but to me, the possibility of one spell that requires a monster’s liver implies that other spells might be possible. I mean, how special could that one monster be? Unless it was an archangel monster. Sam suggests he might be able to jerry-rig some magic using a substitute, and oh, guys, once again I’m sure this was accidental, but I love Sam being able and willing to do magic. Love it so hard. Unfortunately, he abandons this idea, since no substitutes are available.

In another part of the bunker, Cas is leaving fruitless messages with Sergei, who presumably remembers the last episode he was in better than Cas does. And Jody’s not having any luck identifying what she finds. They have a little chat about Claire, who is out of cell phone range (which means she won’t show up in this episode, thank you baby Jesus). Jody doesn’t want to involve her anyway, because she loved Kaia so freaking much after knowing her for, what, a day, and if they’re not able to rescue her, Claire would just be crushed.

I don’t know how we’ll be able to tell, since this is Claire’s crushed-by-the-loss-of-her-true-love face. And it’s also her Alex-borrowed-my-sweater-without-asking face. And her Patience-ate-all-the-Cheetos face.

Uh oh! Jack was listening! What will that do to him? He goes to see Dark Kaia and apologizes for not being able to do more. Dark Kaia blames him for Kaia 1.0 crossing over, and reminds him again that she’s going to die soon. Oddly, she doesn’t try this guilt trip on Dean, who pointed a gun at Kaia 1.0 and forced her into the car, as we saw in the Then. Dark Kaia says she crossed over into our world because she envied Kaia 1.0’s peaceful world, but it turns out she hates it, and desperately wants to go back to her own world. She grabs Jack’s hands and begs him to fix it. Jack touches her face, like he did when he was showing the Winchesters where Mary was being held in AU World, and sees Kaia 1.0 in the Bad Place. She’s got a shelter and a campfire and a lizard in a cage, so I guess things could be worse.

He goes to Sam and Dean and tells them he saw Kaia 1.0 and is going to save her. He confesses to dreamwalking, which is against Billie’s rules, but he insists it’s the right thing to do. “You’ve gotta be kidding me” says a voice from the shadows. Jack introduces Merle, his silver-haired reaper. “How did you get in here?” Dean asks, because he’s forgotten how reapers work, I guess.

(Checks again to make sure this isn’t a Buckleming episode.)

Merle says being willing to risk everything for one person isn’t just dumb, “that’s Winchester dumb.” Dean is offended but, well. She ain’t wrong. Merle says if Jack tries to use his power to save Kaia 1.0, she’ll tell Death. Jack says she should go tell Billie, but while she does that, he’ll open a rift, and therefore Merle will be in big trouble. And I kind of had the impression that reapers didn’t have to, you know, physically go find Billie to tell her anything, but maybe I’m the one who forgot how reapers work.

{Spoiler alert: I don’t think I am.}

Anyway, Jack’s threats work. Merle agrees to fix the bunker’s cosmic warding, which the Winchesters did not completely repair after Amara destroyed it. It can’t be restored permanently, but she can put up a temporary fix that will hopefully hide Jack from Chuck. And she’ll need to use Cas to juice it up. Oh, so many possibilities for disaster here. Later, Sam performs a spell and we see glowing sigils appear on the walls, which is a nice effect.

Sam reading the spell is also a nice effect.

Another time jump. The guys are packing for their journey. Dean asks how Sam feels about it, and Sam says “Honestly? It feels like we’re taking a big, probably stupid risk. It feels good. Disobeying cosmic entities, doing the dumb right thing. Feels like we’re back.” Aw yes. My boys, doing the dumb right thing.

Jody thanks Cas for staying, and he asks her to stay too. Because he’s concerned that if she gets killed, Claire will never get over it. Jody agrees that he’s right. And I’m pretty sure this is going to be important somehow; that something awful will happen because Jody isn’t there, or Jody staying behind will mean she’s able to save the guys somehow. {Spoiler alert: I’m wrong.}

Oddly enough, Jody doesn’t seem to actually tell the Winchesters she’s not going. I guess it happened off camera. Merle and Cas power up the sigils, Jack does his thing, and the rift opens. Dark Kaia goes through first, followed by Sam and Dean.

Bad Place! It’s dark and windy and there are lots of those weird little red-eyed dudes around, but they don’t attack. Dark Kaia says they’re afraid of the oncoming storm. {Sidebar: What evolutionary purpose is solved by glowing eyes? It seems like a hindrance.} They yell for Kaia 1.0, and she comes out to meet them, grabbing Dean for a hug. {Sidebar: Yeah, of course it’s Dean.} They turn to leave and wait, you’re just going to leave your lizard? He’s in a cage! He’ll starve! Dark Kaia doesn’t follow, and says she’s going to stay. Sam reminds her she’ll die, but she doesn’t care. She can’t live in our world. Which, well. It sucks sometimes. No judgment here, kiddo. And I guess she can take care of Kaia 1.0’s lizard. The Winchesters head back to the rift with Kaia 1.0 just as the lightning picks up and a huge cloud of destruction approaches. Oh. I guess that lizard didn’t need anyone to take care of him after all. Bye bye, Bad Place!

Bunker. Jody is sitting in front of the rift when the boys burst through with Kaia 1.0. Big hug! Later, we see Kaia (I’m gonna just call her Kaia now, since I think she’s the only one left) wearing Jack’s clothes. It’s cute. Jody invites her to move back with her. “Will Claire be there?” Kaia asks, because, you know, the love story for the ages, blah blah blah. Kaia thanks the guys, and leaves with Jody. Yay! Job well done, right? Except there’s a little too much time left in this episode for a happy wrap-up, so.

Merle tells the guys that if she gave a rat’s ass about Kaia, she’d call this a victory. But she’s pretty sure their scheme worked, since none of them are dead and oh crap, she’s impaled by a scythe. Guess again, Merle!

So, yeah, Billie’s here and she’s not happy. She lectures everyone and points out that one life isn’t important, because all the worlds are dying. All of them except this one. Sam angrily asks Billie what her plan is. She tells them everyone has a death book in her library, even God. God didn’t plot his own death, but “the books wrote themselves,” so Chuck’s death is in there, pre-plotted. But no one gets to read their own book unless Billie lets them. Jack is in Chuck’s book, and so are the Winchesters. “This is your destiny. You are the messengers of God’s destruction.”

Back at the Radio Shed, Chuck is watching his worlds self-destruct on the bank of TVs. He’s been there a while, judging by the number of takeout containers. The sales clerk is curled up on the floor, having served him “for weeks.” He asks Chuck if he’ll be spared, and Chuck says “You’ll be fine. Everything’s just fine.” Then he walks out of the store just as the sky fills with falling meteorites. Hey, I think that was a lie!

So. Several annoying things happened (yes, we know, because you wouldn’t shut up about them) but I can’t call this a bad episode. But I can’t call it a really good one, either. As mytharc episodes go, I guess it could be worse. What did you think? (And what does the title mean?)

Please help me stay unspoiled, thanks!

#spn #15.12 #recap #tv recaps

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punishedvenomsnake · 4 years

Note

You are one in a MINION! Send this to ten friends you think are simply bananas!

Hello ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to episode one of Jermacraft, the series where I play Minecraft.

This is gonna be a singleplayer let's play and when I say let's play I use that term... pretty loosely because I'm an idiot in this game - you're gonna see lots of fails, you're gonna see lots of triumphs, at least I'm hoping.

So go grab yourself a nice hot cup of coffee, hot cup of cocoa. I've got apple cider right here freshly brewed, let me take a sip.

sip

Ah that's good cider. Alright, so let's get this started - create new world.

World name is going to be... JermaCraft! Sounds about right, eh ok...

Game mode is going to be suurvii- survival, that's the most interesting I think.

More world options- seed for world generator ok this is important!

I gotta name this something crazy to get cool structures and stuff.

Gonna name it... umm... how about,

"DiamondsAreForever"

"LOL"

"cheese"

uh "BURGAH".

Alright, there's- that's our world generator seed, "DiamondsAreForeverLOLcheeseBURGAH"... Done!

Alright let's see what happens, create new world let's do it guys. 'Building terrain' oh my god this is so exciting this is episode one!

I wonder... I wonder where we're gonna end up... Where are we gonna end up?

Ok... what- what? Where the hell am I? I spawned on top of a mountain top! Ok hold on, sound has to be lowered, definitely...

Mkay, a lil' bit of that, a lil' bit of that... maybe a little lower! That sounds about right. Alright!

So, uh, apparently I spawned on top of a mountain... I kinda- this is a good seed!

What's that? We're going to explore it right now - GO!

dies from fall damage

Oh! jerma laugh

... Heheheh... Alright we're going to try that again. This time I'm not gonna miss... I wanna get down to tha- that's the home right there, I wanna live right there.

Don- I don't even have to explore, see if I can't do this... I gotta, hold on... I got an idea, I got a plan.

JermaCraft episode one, this is how we do it! You guys ready? I don't know if you- I don't know if you guys are actually really ready for this!

Here we go! I'm going for a skydive. Remember if you hold shift you don't fall off... That's something I didn't know when I used to livestream this game...

wheeze Heh heh! You guys ready? Ready to go see our new home?

jerma laugh

Alrighty then... What the hell is that? Oh it's an octopus... Look at this quaint little place... I love it already! Heh heh! Alrighty...

So- oh.. exhalation I'm so stupid! Y'see I'm- this is why... this is why I'm an idiot guys... y'see, why would I... I need to get wood! And I just jumped off th- ok...

Remember this... Where are we, pointing east? I have no idea.

Gotta get some trees... That's the most important part of Minecraft you gotta get trees, that's the first thing you gotta get.

Lemme take a sip of my apple cider...

sipping sounds

Oh that's good stuff!

Hopefully you guys picked up a thing of coco like I told you to because that's the most relaxing thing in the world, sitting down, playing videogames... doesn't get much better than that.

Ah ok, c'mon now! Oooh, we got sand too! Now, explain this to me alright?

Alright I want Notch to send me a personal email, and explain to me why there are cows that are acting like Mountain Lions...

I'm gonna kill each one of those cows in just a minute, you watch.

fall damage

Ow... Well at least there's one tree over here... Gotta remember, I gotta go back that way, cause that's where the, the house is gonna be... My awesome dirt house!

So if you are an OLD subscriber, I mean really old, like at least four months ol- month- four... ffweehh four or five months. You'll remember the original JermaCraft it was like two episodes...

And I built a dirt house. This is gonna be completely different I'm going to actually spend time... and make some cool stuff. At least that's what I'm pretending that I'm gonna say that.

Got some wood... aw I got Geno still (his Minecraft skin) from Mario RPG, one of the best games of all time. If you have never played Mario RPG I suggest you play it.

Alright, got some wood, I need more trees over here I can... dig up. I'll get this one too.

excruciatingly slow wood punching

One more and we'll make our way back.

more wood punching

So I guess they added a hunger feature now too if- if you're hungry, you... you die? ... Or something, I guess? Who knows?

even more wood punching

Little bit more wood... And in my livestreams I- I was, always a tradition that when I played this game I would sing a song when things got really boring.

So that seems like the perfect opportunity right now to sing a song, so uh lemme just prep my vocal chords for a second...

sips apple cider

clears throat

Ok... So we're getting wood right now right?

(In Jazz Tune) doodoo, doo doo, (kh) doo, (kh) doo, (kh) doooo doo dooo doo doo, (kh) doo, (kh) doo (kh), doooo.

We're chopping wood down!

(kh) doodoo, doo (kh).

Every single day...

(kh) doo, (kh) doo, (kh) doooo.

I gotta get my tools!

(tch) m'doo (kh)

Any which way.

(tch) doodoo, (kh) doo, (kh) doooo doo doo.

I can't seem to reach this stupid piece of wood, so I gotta put some blocks down to get where I should...

I'mgonnachopem.

(tch) d'dnn, (tch) nhh, (tch) nhhh~

I'm gonna chop right now.

nhh, (tch) nhh, (tch) doooonnnh~ doodooonnh~ doon, (tch) doon, (tch)

fall damage

Alright that's enough... Got it! Let's get the hell outta here! Yaaay!~ splash So those of you that don't think that's gonna be a good spot- you'll see...

I'm gonna build that up to be like a castle! So here's the goal... by Christmas time of this year, 2011, I wanna have... a giant castle like as big as that, uhh, that mountain over there...

begins breaking blocks

So let's clean this up a little bit. Why don't we huh? Yeah alright, alright! ... Maybe put a little bit of dirt down here... Make sure I can y'know...

D- did I really run out of dirt? Wonderful... My first wooden tools. It's just like going to your first day of school... And get, punched in the face by the bully...

Speaking of bullies... I got a funny story for you. First ever story on JermaCraft! While I do this mundane stuff.

So... when I was like in the fourth grade, there was a kid that lived down the street from me, his name will- will stay anonymous, because... y'know I don't want him to like- if he watches these videos- I don't want him to come, like, beat me up.

Not that he would ever remember this to begin with... but I- I was probably like the fourth grade... And eh, swallows I was a little S-word guys I was a little- I was a little... little jerk when I was younger.

So essentially what happened, was- this kid, he was a big, big, fat kid: scary, not very nice. And my brother got in like a fight with him, like a looong time before this v- when I was like the second grade my brother's a little bit older than me...

And lemme pick this up.

So my brother got in a fight with this kid and... and... and like I heard about it. And so at the bus stop one day, cause we were at the same bus stop because he lives right down the street from us. At leas- at least he did, I don't know if he does anymore.

So... I dunno why- I was in the fourth grade this so much of a little jerk I was. So my grandmother used to pick me up from school, after I got from the bus stop...

Because y'know obviously you don't wanna walk- y'know, the mile and a half back to your house or whatever it is, mile... Cause the bus stop wasn't that close.

So my grandma used to pick me up, and he was at the bus stop as well, and one day I decided that out of the back window, I was going to give him a double middle finger, as I was driving with my grandmother one day.

I dunno why- I don't even know why I did it guys I can't- I can't tell you one reason why I gave this kid the double middle finger. And from that day forward, he just kinda gave me the w- like a weird look like "What? The hell are you doing?"

And from that day forward I would RUN. RUN, as fast as I could to the bus stop, and away to the bus stop where my grandmother was gonna pick me up, and it was like that for almost six months.

And he never beat me up or anything like that he, eh- he, I- I he- I don- I don- I was like, overreacting.

Actually hold on a second I don't need this... What am I doing with this? I was just putting blocks down! Actualy nonono, I was- I was doing the right thing. I want- I want these. Cause I wanna make like a wall kind of...

Let's keep that going. So yeah, so I guess the moral of the story is, never give the double middle finger to a bully. Cause, you'll be scared for the rest of your life.

And I still am scared, when I like open my doors to like, go and get the groceries... I'm scared. That bully's gonna come get me for me... givin' him the bird.

Yeah- yeah that is actually a true story I did not make that up it- I was scared for like, at least six months. And nothing ever happened either, and like- like I didn't get beat up or anything, so...

Alright now. Is there- is this all- is this gonna go straight down into... ok cool. C-o-o-o-o-l! I'm gonna make a little mine here!

hisses

It's getting late... it's getting late and when it gets late that's when Jerma starts to lose.

starts digging 4x4 hole straight down

I don't think I've ever made it past one night in this game when people are watching. I really don't think it's happened.

ambient cave sound

Is that- Ooh, there's a mine somewhere around here... Pretty sick! Oh jeez- it's right here! Ohohohoh! Nice! Maybe there's coal right here too, that'd be pretty awesome!

Oh my god, Creeper! Creeper get the hell outta here! I'm gonna kick your butt! Y'know yeah- yeah blow up! Go on, go on what do you think I care?

You can't hurt me I got a shovel! I'm gonna shovel your face in-

creeper explodes and takes off more than half of Jerma's health

gasp

... Ok well that's done. chuckles There's not coal just right here somewhere? There has to be... See this is why they always tell you, right when you start, you need to go get coal, you need to go get wood and everything, but I was too busy talking about a bully... me giving him the middle finger.

So looking- I'm trying to see if I can see coal, sometimes it's just right on the edge of these mountains...

stares into pitch black

Hmmmm... I am not pleased! ... Let's at least do this. I need a sheep too, I need wool! I'm being a real piece of crap...

#long post

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familyiswhoyouchoose · 5 years

Text

Lights, Camera, Act Right (CH 1)

Most men in Hanzo's line of work lived glamorously if not gaudy lives adorned with drugs, jewels, cars, and their personal preference of company to keep the lonely nights at bay. While it was undeniable that they might've had a passion for their art - he couldn't find it in himself to respect someone who blatantly threw their wealth around as if it contributed even an inch to their acting ability. Which led him to the predicament that he was in now. Staring into the eyes of a harpy who'd yelled herself hoarse and red-faced after he made it explicitly clear that no matter how much of a tantrum she threw or how many zeros she put in her offer, he would not be her eye candy to the premiere that evening. It wasn't her fault really, she was a lovely woman before all of the screaming and ranting, and Hanzo figured any man would've been happy to be on her arm. However, he wasn't just any man and he certainly wasn't interested in someone who wanted to pay for his company. The very thought sent shivers down his spine. After all, he made enough money from the use of his likeness and the movies that he'd starred in along with the TV show cameos and other media outlets. And with the way the paparazzi were flashing their cameras, he could only assume that this would be another "cash cow" so to speak but also a headache for another time. His phone vibrated in his pocket, dragging his attention away from the fuming woman whose agent had scurried over to try and help her save face by calming her down. The man's pleas fell on deaf ears as Hanzo took the call, plugging one of his ears with a knuckle to better hear the person on the other line. "Hoho, you are in trouble, anija!" Genji said in a sing-song voice, the smug satisfaction practically dripping from his words. "The news spread that quickly?" Hanzo asked, turning on his heel and ignoring the irate cry of 'Get back here!' as he left the lobby area of the hotel, making a beeline for the elevator. "Yup," Genji replied, popping the 'p' in the way that Hanzo knew the situation was steadily going from bad to worse. "Says that you told her off and she was going to give you a piece of her mind." Hanzo sighed, thankful that he was alone in the elevator. The commotion from outside paired with security hindered most of the traffic flow into the building allowing him to slip away unnoticed for the time being. With his own security guarding the entrance, a lack of people flooding the halls and the elevators, Genji’s voice was all he had to listen to.

Though that meant his plans for going out to get food were shot even if he was wearing a disguise. "She offered to give me a small fortune, Genji." "Oooh, wrong move," Genji tutted. "You know you're priceless, anija." Hanzo rolled his eyes. While his fame and wealth had brought him a considerable amount of prestige, little brothers would always be little brothers. The elevator’s chime alerted him to reaching the uppermost level and he stepped off with a cursory glance down either side of the hall. Fishing his key card from his pocket, he headed to his room, listening to Genji chatter on about his day and the progress he’d made with editing and posting up his videos.

“Comments on YouTube are the funniest thing in the world, brother, I’m telling you,” Genji cackled, the clacking of keys carrying over the phone’s receiver.

Hanzo unlocked his room door and slipped inside, pulling off his shoes while balancing his phone between his shoulder and ear. “When they aren’t fighting against each other for ‘first’ or insulting one another’s mother?”

Stumbling forward after getting them off, he set them neatly by the door and made way for his bed, undoing his top knot as he went.

“Well, at least it’s a lot easier to get comments on YouTube than it is on fanfiction,” Genji answered, Hanzo’s sharp gasp eliciting raucous laughter, loud enough that he had to move the phone away from his ear.

If looks could kill, his phone would’ve been dead ten times over as he glared at the receiver as if it offended his entire family just by existing to relay such a horrendous message. “You swore to never mention that again,” he hissed, sitting down and slowly bringing it back to his ear. “Youswore Genji.”

“Yeah, well, all is fair in love and validation,” Genji said, not sounding sorry in the slightest.

Hanzo huffed and laid back on the duvet with a heavy thump, bouncing slightly as the mattress shifted beneath his weight. One hand combing through his hair while the other settled the phone between his shoulder and head again, he set to taking off his watch and wrist bracelet, pausing when he caught sight of the time. Genji’s laughter and chatter faded away as Hanzo sat up abruptly, knocking the phone across the bed. His head on a swivel towards the digital clock on his bedside table, 5:45 PM flashing at him in bright white letters.

Keeping his gaze on the clock, he slowly lifted up the phone to his ear and caught the tailwind of another of Genji’s stories about opening fan letters. There wasn’t any sound beyond his little brother’s ranting — as if he was home alone. Hanzo’s eyes narrowed.

“Genji,” Hanzo interrupted, voice eerily calm and quiet. “What time is it for you?”

“Uh.. about two forty-five, wh—” Genji paused mid sentence and Hanzo felt the other shoe drop when a muffled noise and sharp cry of ‘fuck’ came through on the other side.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Hanzo groaned and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling another raging headache coming on. “Genji, tell me you remembered to pick up the boys from school,” he pleaded, hoping that his little brother was just in his work room rather than home alone at 2:45 in the afternoon… on a school day.

“What was that…?” Genji asked, muffled crackling noises coming through and Hanzo held the phone a little ways from his ear, glaring at it with disdain. “Sorry Hanzo, I wasn’t.. Oh no, the connection is breaking… I…”

There was absolutely no way the connection could be breaking. Genji prided himself on his data and uploading speed, if even one of his videos or calls lagged, he would throw a fit. And Hanzo would never hear the end of it. Eyebrow twitching, Hanzo breathed in deeply and counted backwards from ten before exhaling.

“Genji, I swear to you,” he began, praying to the heavens for patience.

“Relax, brother,” Genji chided, although he sounded slightly out of breath, from running to the car if Hanzo’s guess was right. “I’m only… fifteen minutes late.”

Hanzo pursed his lips, sucking his teeth as a thought came to mind. “Do you remember that ‘Worlds Best Uncle’ mug I got for you?”

“Use it everyday,” Genji chirped.

Hanzo smiled thinly, whispering ominously. “I’m breaking it into pieces.”

“No, brother please, anything but the mug!”

“Then your face,” Hanzo said dryly, scowling at the wall. “I’m breaking your face.”

Genji sighed. “Well, the mug was nice while it lasted.”

It was moments like this that Hanzo wished he’d gotten the dog that he asked for instead of the screaming pink-faced raisin that was Genji Shimada. Alas, thirty-five years later, he was still stuck with him for better or worse. Right now though, it was worse.

“ Genji .”

“My face is what makes me money, brother!” Genji shouted, the sound of a car door unlocking making Hanzo roll his eyes. “And you know what they say about your money maker.”

“If you don’t pick up your nephews in the next ten minutes, your older brother will smash it?”

A beat of silence passed between them, only the sounds of Genji clicking his seatbelt to Hanzo’s relief filling the void before his brother spoke again with a deadpan tone. “....That was terribly literal.”

“The clock is ticking, Genji,” Hano replied, making a ‘tick tock’ noise, biting back laughter at Genji’s exaggerated groan.

“Okay, okay. I’ll call you back when I get them, Dadzo .”

Seizing up at the nickname, Hanzo shouted indiginantly, “Gen—” before three soft beeps punctuated the end of the call leaving him alone in his hotel room staring at the obnoxious display picture of his brother when he’d dyed his hair an eye-gouging shade of green. Sliding through his apps, Hanzo opened up one of his photo albums and shuffled backwards onto the bed until his back pressed against the headboard, thumbing through the photos until he found one of two boys smiling at the camera and waving.

The caption beneath it reading ‘Shingen and Hayao stole your phone - Genji’. Hanzo snorted, shaking his head as he switched from the photo album to his voice mails, scrolling through to one of the most recent saved ones. Pressing it, he waited for it to start playing, smiling as two young voices laughing and yelling filled the background with Genji’s trying to talk over them.

“Hanzo! Answer your phone! Ugh, hey guys, could you come here real fast?”

Dogs barking and loud footsteps followed, the noise muffled on the other end, Genji’s voice further away and hard to make out.

“On the count of three… real loud… home early…”

Hanzo knew what was coming and held his phone further from his ear when two loud voices yelled, “Dad, we miss you!”, at the same time. It nearly blew his eardrum the first time he listened in — afraid that something might’ve happened. Only to find that it was one of his brother’s pranks but also a heartfelt message. Genji’s laughter coming through as he said, “Come home soon, brother! And call me back, you do know how a phone works right?”

Hanzo rolled his eyes heavenward but his smile fell. The room seemed… so much bigger in the absence of voices or other persons. It was strange.

“Maybe I have been away from home too long,” he muttered, rewinding the message and laying his phone beside him, letting it play out again.

His eyes fluttered shut and he breathed in deeply. Perhaps if he just imagined it, it would feel like he was at home.

#lcar #hanzo shimada #genji shimada #shingen shimada #hayao shimada

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gunnygazette-blog · 3 years

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Wk#5 Games

GAME OF THE WEEK

(1) Runnin’ Naked (2-0) @ (5) Stanky Feet (2-0)

Why?: Only top 5 game and battle of undefeateds of the week

This is how you pick the top game in the league. The Top teams in the North and Central Divisions clash this week and put there undefeated records on the line.

“Nekkid as a Jaybird” is coming in with a 9 game winning streak which is the current longest in league. Fueled by an offense that moves the ball through the air...they may get a chance to take advantage of pour defense to retain their number one ranking. Defensively they will have their hands full but just need to do “just enough” to win.

The “Land of Toe Fungi” have a 5 game win streak of their own. They have done just enough to win...so I am curious to see how this plays out… Will the offense be able to get something near to what their average scoring is? 26 points could be enough to win… Will their defense be able to stand up to a down the field passing attack? Inquiring minds want to know...

Prediction: Streakers 23-18

My pick: Same...but much closer...

Game #2

(13) Sparkies (1-2) @ (10) Reaps (1-1) 0-26 14-42 2018

Why?: Should be a close defensive struggle

These teams have only met twice in 5 seasons, back in 2018 when they were in the same division. The Un-dead took both games 26-0 & 42-14… Two losses...what a coincidence...the Static Cling are currently nursing a two game losing streak… Not a surprise when neither your offense of defense is in the top 10 of a 17 team league… Low Voltage relies almost exclusively on the pass...and has a steep drop of if the starter is not in… After being beat-up pretty badly the last couple of weeks they will see if they can get the sacks and pressure they had week #1.

The Cold Corpses on the otherhand are trying get their first win streak going this week… They will rely heavily on their defense this week as their worst ranked Offense has yet to gel… The biggest issue is if they can keep from helping the Agitated Ions… The longer the field...and DBs being able to find the ball in the air will be key...

Prediction: Reaps 9-2

My pick: Oooh...maybe a lil’ more scoring...but not a lot...

Game #3

(11) Duu-vowel Raid (1-2) @ (8)Teddy Bears (2-2)

Why?: Winner has the best chance to challenge the Nekkids’ for the Division Title

Previous match-ups has gone the Fuzzy-one’s way...32-6 & 8-0...but Duu-Vowel hoping to ease last week’s close loss with an upset… If they do...it will be behind a rushing attack and their defense...

The Grizzled-ones are wanting to add to their 2 game winning streak and find their 2019 form… Offensively they have found a way to score points after their week one shutdown. Defensively they’ve also improved...at least against lesser foes… Wait...that’s what this week is...

Prediction: Teddy Grizz’s 25-17

My pick: ...about right...

Game #4

(6) Chefs (2-1) @ (12) Mee-Ah-mee Raid (0-1)

Why?: Everyone wants to see how the Chefs react to not living up to there own Hype

The Cooks left the Kitchen after it got too hot...to earn their 1st loss in 2yrs. The loss dropped them 4 spots in the team rankings while their offense dropped 3 spots. Being unable to move the ball and put it in the endzone was only the symptom. Wide receivers not getting open and no time to throw were the basic causes for the lack of production. Then again, the running game here kinda happens by accident. Defensively, there not built to win the game...only slow down the other team enough to get a lead and then force them to mistakes as they try to play catch-up… Lapses in coverage and the inability to get meaningful pressure on the QB spelled disaster...and all the infighting...

Since their last minute lost in the 2018 ‘ship...the Southern Raaaaiidddahs have posted 7 straight regular season losses, which at one point was the reason they jumped to an easier league. Offensively they were held in check in their only game...and have yet to score a point this year… Defensively they were picked apart by an offense that was pass first...past second...and will face the same this weekend… This has a chance to be a shootout...but the home team has had too many weeks off to win that way...and the Chefs are mad...

Prediction: Kitchen workers 26-14

My pick: If the Raid had a couple more games under their belt the chance is I might have gone the other way...but I’ll stick to the numbers...

Game #5

(3) Glads (2-0) @ (9) Pee-Rats (1-1)

Why?: It had to go somewhere on this list

Who the hell would make this the game of the week? Pee-Rats are smarting after their first loss where they were favored by 15 and because of a postponement they just avoided having a current three game losing streak. Speaking of losing, they have a lifetime streak of 7 losses with no wins to the Glads: 48-14, 44-6, 19-0, 60-0, 54-0, 30-2, 35-13. Against the Glads they average only 5ppg...and for the 9th ranked offense that struggles with lesser defenses at 15.5ppg., who can’t throw or run the ball...this could be a long game against the currently ranked best defense in the league… A mediocre 13th rated defense will need to find a long hidden run defense…but I suspect they will have to blitz all game just to be kept from being ground into the dirt by the run…and thus providing big plays in the pass...

Glads are looking for their 4th consecutive win and thanks to the Pee-Rats being generous with give-aways and short fields...this could be a “not so interesting” second half much like last weeks game...

Prediction: Champs 31-8

My pick: I think that is a minimum score for the Glads and a maximum score for the Pee-Rats

Game #6

(2) Aud-i-Bulls (3-0) @ (16) Flat Fish (0-2)

Why?: Second Best...versuses Second Worst...will there be big game let down...

Quot-a-Bulls are on a 3-game win streak and I see no reason for it stop here… Throwing the ball against a team weak against the pass means success...only a big game letdown will keep them under 50pts… Defensively...they could possibly score more points than their opponents offense

Somethin’ smells rancid...and it starts with the 6-game losing streak the Flat Fish are on… An Offense that averages less than 7 carries a game is just a heave it down the field...and in this game that spells interceptions… They may double their seasons total Ints thrown in one game… Defensively they’re a train wreck heading into another high scoring offense’s sights…

Horned-ones 36-11

My pick: Sounds about right

Game #7

(7) A.R.M.Y. (1-1) @ (15) Rust Curtains (1-3)

Why?: Not suppose to be close

Both teams meet with a chance to have there 2nd loss in as many games. Soldier Boys have been chomping at the bit to take out their loss on a weaker foe...and here is their chance… They will be able to run the ball effectively...ok...more like chunk plays and than play action into some explosive plays. Defensively they’re blitzing scheme will cause havoc on the front line...which means sacks and Turn overs galore…

Did I mention there isn’t a Steel Mill in Florida...well their hasn’t been many wins for the pseudo-pitt crew either. They’ll keep it close against most of the north and central teams… But this week they get a Western Division team… Offensively they will be out of sinc a lot… Defensively they will get hurt on the edges… Other than the opponent having to come across the state...not much is going their way...

Prediction: Tin Soldiers 42-6

My pick: Being on the road is the only reason I think they might score less...but still win

Game #8

(17) Cow Puppies (0-3) @ (4) Wild Weasels (3-0)

Why?: 3-0 vs 0-3...only interesting if there is an upset

On a leash and getting worse...call that a 3-game losing… Offensively their “success” has been on the ground...and not a good thing if your going to play catch-up the whole game… But when you can’t protect your QB I’d run too... Defensively they’ve been gouged through the air...and that should continue...

Those Waskaly Wild Weasels are on a 5 game win streak and get another team that is their type of opponent...Defensively “abus-able” through the air and offensively unable to keep up… They could have some early problems if they don’t click on offense and can’t stop the run...but that is a lot of what-ifs...

Prediction: Donut boys just miss a chance to get there own donuts 64-3

My pick: I think it could be closer...the flea mutts may get a win this year...but this ain’t it...

BYE

(14) Sea Ponies (0-3) - and probably never happier...

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amnachil · 6 years

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The High School Game Part 15

Hi everyone ! I know the story is kinda long and it’s hard to follow... But I want to post it until the end anyway x) Don’t worry, we already exceeded the halfway point !

Gregory DAY 109 Saturday

Exceptionnally, Finn organized a party depiste not being an after-match saturday. The dark-haired boy went his head full of expectation. The 3rd week of January ended and depiste some setback, his plans were working well. His own popularity started to rise again. They all had forgotten his dramatic "perverse" attitude, from now on, and with his new behavior he attracted sympathy. Plus, with his bulk-up, he would soon be better than Raphaël, and took his place. By the way, Gregory had found a new partner in crime : Kim. They had been talking lengthily. The girl had been expelled from her last school because she had insulted and assaulted physically a schoolmate. But she had big expectations for her new high school. Raphaël and Shirley were exactly the kind of people she hated. She planned to humiliate them, one after another, with his help. And Gregory was happy to help, of course. Plus, tonight, she prepared something for another bitch he hated. But right now, the lad was eating joyfully at the buffet with Sam. Shirley's boyfriend, despite being the fatty, was quite popular among the 11th grade. Several student still respected the ex-right arm of Raphaël. Gregory hated Shirley, but he learnt to appreciate Sam. His advice were usefull, after all. And while he’s with me, he isn’t with his fucking girlfriend. She was not here, by the way, and Sam told Gregory she was busy, without details.

"Jeez, it was a good meal." whispered the fatty while patting his belly.

Gregory looked at him with a glint a challenge.

"Are you seriously stuffed ? I can eat at least a whole pizza by myself because of my bulk-up."

Sam smiled.

"Do you imply you can eat more than me ? Man, you already tried to overfeed me, and you never succeed."

"We'll see."

I know I’ll not gain weight, by the way, while you will balloon even more... Stupid cow. They both dug in wishing to win this food contest. Gregory took a slice of pizza, then a can of beer, and then a slice of pizza. He repeated the little game several time, only taking break to belch loudly and evacuate the air. After a while, feeling bloated, he discreetly unbuttoned his belt and jeans in order to let his expanding belly breathe. Sam smiled while swallowing a big slice of pizza.

"Are you stuffed little boy ? I'm only starting, you know ?"

Liar. His opponent's paunch was bloated, hard, and pushing against his shirt, and he rubbed it with his free hand. Gregory took a can of beer, and gulped.

"I'm, buuurrp, not finished yet. Burp. You'll be.. buuuurrp, surprised."

He began again to stuff his face. He could feel his shirt button having an hard time holding the pressure, but did not care. He ate again a whole pizza, while drinking beer. Sam was right on his heels, but he did not care. He swallowed again a slice, burping loudly. I can't lose this again. No way. He rushed another pizza and polished it as fast as possible. He bloated belly was heavy now. He had some difficulties to walk, but he did not care. Eat was his only aim. After a while, he took a break and sighed, overstuffed. His belly gurgled, in pain, and he rubbed it slowly. Woah... However, Sam smiled, himself rounder and bigger, but still eating.

"Do you give up ?" he asked.

"Nah... buuuuurp... I know I can.... buuuuurp.... eat more."

His opponent pushed a big container towards him.

"This is chocolat mousse. Easy to eat. Let's see if you can do this."

Gregory nodded, took a big spoon and swallowed. Wow, this is tasty... Slowly, under Sam eyes, he ate spoon after spoon. His belly, gurgling, was pushing against his shirt. Oooh. Sometimes, he drank another beer and burped. After a long time, he succeeded to finish the container. He was so stuffed he could barely move, and certainly not get up. His both hands rubbing his belly, he closed his eyes, be prey to a succession of belch. He was near to a food-coma, and unable to speak. Did I won ?

"I think, burp, you did a good job." whispered Sam. "But I'm, brup, still better. Maybe you should try, burp, again later."

A clamor woke Gregory up. His friend were gathered in Finn's garden, and laughing. What’s happening ? Slowly, he stood up. Wow... He felt his belly, still complety bloated, heavier than usual. Sam was sleeping on a chair next to him, but he ignored him. Groggy, he headed towards the gathering. He glimpsed Raphaël, sat on a corner, his legs spreaded while speaking with Liam. Otherwise, the room was wasteland : they all were in the garden. Gregory arrived and watched what triggered this laughs. Barbara, the class delegate he hated, was in the pool, half-naked, trying to wash the vomit covering her hairs and clothes. Kim, apparently drunk, was yelling :

"I'm sorry ! So sorry ! Please, let me help you !"

She dived into the water and reached their schoolmate while screaming like a pig. My god, she's so funny. I love her. Finn gave him a beer and laughed :

"She's awesome ! Just watch her Gerg !"

The supporting striker agreed. He took a mouthful of his can and laughed when Kim, pretending to help Barbara, took this one pants off. The class delegate shouted :

"Stop it ! Stop it ! You're drunk ! Let me alone !"

Holy shit... They all were in stitches. Kim threw up her diner on Barbara, who screamed with horror. My fuckin' god ! Barbara headed towards the edge and got out of the pool, only with her lingeries, soaked. Kim yelled :

"I'm sorry ! Really sorry ! Can I help you ?"

"Hell no ! You did enough !" retorted the class delegate.

She looked for Jessy, but Liam's girlfriend was too busy laughing to help her. Consequently, Barbara left them running towards the exit. Gregory drank the rest of his can, patted his still bloated belly with satisfaction, and came near to the edge. Kim smiled. He loved this. She was ready to humiliate herself in order to beat her opponent. And she was perfectly serving his interest by doing so.

"Did you liked this ?" she asked, not in the least drunk.

He opened his mouth and belched loudly.

"Yeah, I kinda liked, buuuuurp. You know what ? I think you're my favourite... buuuurp... evil girl."

I need another beer, by the way. She smiled spitefully.

"I guess you're me favourite burping man. Did someone already tell you that you were good at belching ?"

Again, he burped loudly, and shook his head. Except you of course, because you already understood I'm the best for everything.

Liam DAY 111 Monday

Last monday of January came with a good new : snow. The entire town was under a covering of snow. Cool ! This morning, Liam woke up earlier, excited like a kid, and rushed outside in pajamas despite the cold. He ran in circle during at least 5 minutes, before his sister shouted :

"Brother ! Come here before getting sick !"

"Chloe ! It's snow !!!"

"Yeah, I saw !"

He made a snowball, and watched her with a smile. (Okay, he maybe grew in height, but his mind was still 10 years old). She screamed when he threw his missile.

"Seriously ?!"

Liam nodded. Suddenly, he glimpsed Raphaël, in sportwear, running next to them. Hum... This was a terrible idea. A bad idea. But boy with a 10 years old maturity would probably do it. However, he did not have time to attack, because a big and soft snowball hit him in the belly. His captain smirked.

"I know what you were thinking, dude."

" How ?"

Raphaël smiled, but Chloe, who took his winter jacket and was now making a snowball, answered :

"You did the same thing last year brother. And the year before. I think we are used to it, now."

"Remember, do not hit under the belt." ordered Raphaël.

Liam spirit was suddenly excited like for christmas. Oh yeah ! He rushed a tree to hide and collect his munitions. This is the best day of my life ! (Okay, not the best, but as every 10 years old kid, every day was the best day of his life). Anyway, it was time to win a battle.

Latter, during the afternoon break, Liam sneezed. I think I caught a cold... Obviously, playing in the snow in pajamas was probably the cause, but he had a lot of fun, and it was worthy. The goalkeeper ate slowly his donut (this donut was supposed to be eaten by Jessy, but whatever) and sighed. With the snow, the heated spirits were gone, and everyone just enjoyed the day, without any complaint. Raphaël, sat on the bench, stared at him and frowned.

"Why aren’t you with Jessy, by the way ?"

"She is comforting Barbara... They decided to stay together today, even if my love didn’t help our delegate during the party... I wonder if Kim apologised."

"Probably..." replied softly Raphaël. "Are you bulking-up, or somethin' ?"

Liam turned his head towards his friend, surprised.

"No. Why ?"

"Well, you just eat more than before, but it's not a big deal I guess."

Oh... well... this food is supposed to feed Jessy... To be honest, Jessy ate enough by herself, and she was gaining weight by being lazy and gourmand. However, Liam did not realized he was becoming like her.

"Do you fear I gain weight ?" he asked prudently.

He knew his captain was a sport addict. Workout was his religion. And Liam feared his judgment. (Not only his judgment, by the way...).

"Absolutely not." replied Raphaël with a smile. "Firstly, you just did a growth spurt, and your weight have to catch up. Secondly, you have a fast metabolism to help you, and I'm sure indulging a little is not a big deal. Thirdly, you're our goalkeeper, not our supporting striker. You could have some meat on your bones you know, we're not playing at national level."

Liam nodded silently. This reaction was unexpected. Raphaël noticed, because he laughed.

"Being a workout passionate don't mean I will oblige my friends to do the same, you know ? As much as you respect the rules, I'm fine with you."

The rules. The team captain often spoke about the rules. However, the goalkeeper was not sure to understand well.

"Well, you gave up Sam because he was not respecting the rules, so ? I thought it was because he became fat."

"That's funny, because I never gave up Sam. He left by himself, convinced I would abandon him, but I never intended to. As far as you're conforming to the rules Liam, I have nothing against you. Sam could be a little overweight, I did not care until he decided to encourage this way of life. He became a deviant. Do you get it ?"

"Not really, but don't worry. I'm not becoming fat, and I'm not a chubby chaser."

(A little lie from time to time was not serious... Okay, it was serious, but Liam refused to lost Raphaël's friendship only because they had a different point of view).

His captain nodded, and they went to the class, as close as ever.

Shirley DAY 113 Wednesday – 114 Thursday

This evening, the girl sat nervously on the couch. She was alone, for now, and stressed. According to her mother, Dan would be back today, only for the night. He had been sleeping at a friend's flat, still according to her. Tonight, I will apologise... Shirley did not see him since their argument, and each day, she felt more pathetic. Plus, she tried to offer Kilian some food, and help for his homework, but he always declined. Sam supported her in this initiative, but still, their schoolmate was too afraid about his family's reaction. She heard the door opening. Dan was there. Quite stressed, she waited him. Her brother dressed with a black jeans and a tigh white shirt (the buttons were compressing his belly), looked at her. He is mad...

"Hi brother. I waited you to talk." she hesitantly said.

He ignored her, put his bag on the floor and then opened the cookie box (they had a cookie box in the living room). While eating, he turned towards her. He knew I was here... Mum likely told him before going at the restaurant.

"I'm sorry." she proclaimed. "I was selfish and blind. I did not understand your feelings. But I do now, and I want to help you with all this stuff."

"Do you know what is an erogenous zone ? And how it could be weak with some people ?"

"What do you mean ?"

He was eating a cookie, patting peacefully his belly, but his tone was cold. And she glimpsed a glint of rancor in his eyes.

"You want to help me ? Apologise to Raphaël for everything you did."

"What Raphaël is doing in this stuff ? Who care about him ?"

"I do. I knew you disliked him, but I did not expected you would kick him in the balls and then punch him like a barbarian !"

Shirley did not understand. She felt her rancor against the devil growing inside. Jeezus, I need to control myself. Dan is my brother, not one of his minions... And Kilian told me Raphaël did something good for him.

"Look, I don't really get it, but I think he lied to you and told some bullshits about me. I just want to help you. I'm not a bad sister."

"Can you, for once, stop thinking only about you ? You said you're selfish, and again, you proved this. I'm just asking you to apologise."

This is the best. She skipped the restaurant in order to make up with him, and he came here, insulting her and speaking about the devil ?

"I will not apologise to him, brother. He lied to you, I swear. Yes, I kicked him, but it was not that violent or..."

"Shut the fuck up Shirley. You're a fucking disappointment. I thought we were inseparable, but it seems I was wrong. You only think about your person, and you don't care about the other, including me."

"That's a lie !" she shouted. "How can I prove you I'm not selfish ? You're just blinkered ! How can I convince you ?"

"Not by yelling on me." he whispered before taking his bag.

He went upstairs, leaving her alone and tembling. How the fuck it degenerated like this ?

The next morning, when she woke up for her daily workout, Dan was already gone. Her mother told her he was not coming back for a while, feeling uncomfortable here. The most ironic ? Mr and Ms Vince, as her twins sisters all accepted kindly Dan's coming out. I'm the only one being so selfish. She felt even more pathetic. But, in order to do the right thing, she could not feel demoralized. Sam was busy with Gregory, trying to fatten this asshole. And by the way, it was slowly working. His high consumption of energy drinks and beer made his belly slightly round the whole day. Sadly, it was hard to say if he was gaining weight or only bloated. Anyway, Sam was working on it, and she was useless, Gregory hating her. She decided to focus on another problem. Raphaël being out of range, and Barbara too cautious since the last party, Shirley tried to help Kilian. But today, she needed to shift into high gear. She did her workout, showered, and then left the house. In 15 minutes, she reached her schoolmate's home (being the only De Beauchêne in town, it was easy to find him). Feeling brave for once, she knocked. A giant opened. Kilian's father was really tall (like 200 cm) and Shirley needed to look up in order to see his face. Futhermore, he was quite muscled, and she gulped, suddenly less brave. Behind him, two guys exactly like him, tall and impressive, stared at her. Holy shit... I start to understand... In comparison, Kilian was like a tiny little kid.

"Who are you ?" asked Mr. De Beauchêne with a booming voice.

Oh wow... Maybe this was not a really good idea after all...

"I'm Kilian's friend, and I went to pick him up." she eventually say timidly.

The father scrutinized her like if she was for sale. The tow brothers were smiling maliciously, and she seriously considered running (despite their physics, at least she was pretty sure to win a race).

"Have you a boyfriend ?" asked Mr. De Beauchêne suddenly.

She nodded, and the atmosphere relaxed a bit. Kilian was serious, about this anti-gay and lesbian stuff. His schoolmate showed up, and stared at her with a glint saying "you're mad Shirley" in his eyes. I'm here now, so please, come. Slowly, he came closer.

"She pretended to be your friend." proclaimed his father. "Is that true ?"

Kilian nodded carefully. Then, he went in the street and intimated her to follow. She felt Mr. De Beauchêne and his sons staring at them until they disapeared behind a house. At this moment, Kilian sighed loudly.

"I did not know you wanted to die, Shirley." he whispered.

She smiled. I'm not committing suicide. I'm proving to myself I'm not selfish. They went to Ms. Liliano's bakery (where she glimpsed Gregory buying his donuts, just before they entered).

"Choose somethin', I will buy it." she said.

Kilian stared at her, amazed.

"You sure ?"

"Well, I did this for Sam before he decided to buy it by himself because I was not providing enough, so yes, I'm sure. I guess you have no breakfast, and everyone need a breakfast."

He smiled like a kid. Behind the plaster, his black eye (apparently, his brothers made sure he always had one) and his hood, she glimpsed his cute face. The face of an happy man. And this was all she wanted right now. Someone happy and thanksful.

Gregory DAY 116 Saturday

"Come on, it's like protein shake you know ?"

The lad watched the mixture with reluctance. I don't know, I already ate a lot and drank a lot too... He patted his bloated belly, convinced he had already enough energy. But Kim, who offered him this mixture, was insistent.

"You know, it's not a drug or something. It's a protein mixture, in order to have a good condition during your match. Don't be silly, for god sake."

"Are you sure it will work ?"

"Sure. And no one need to know. You and me, that's all. You said you wanted to surpass Raphaël, don't you ?"

Well... I guess I can take it, after all. He prudently took the mixture, and injected it himself. He felt his whole body shaking when his musled recieved the excess of energy. Kim smiled, satisfied :

"Are you ready to win like a superstar ?"

"Hell yes !"

They suddenly heard clapping. Surprised, Gregory tunerd towards the sound : it was Jessy, proudly holding her phone.

"I wonder what I will do with those photo..." she laughed. "I bet Raphaël will expell you from the team."

Gregory rushed her and stood in front of her, menacing.

"You'll not do that, fucking bitch."

"Why not ?" she asked.

This asshole. Fucking slut. Come on, we already humiliated you...Do you really want to do this again ?

"Barbara will be pleased to finally punish you Kim. She did not like you, in case you care."

The chubby girl smiled.

"Neither do I, little girl. But I know you will ask something for yourself before all."

Gregory gave her a dirty look. No way. We don't negociate with this bitch. She's a fucking defeated slut.

"Delete those photo, Jessy, or I will." he threatened.

She stared at him, smiling.

"You'll not. Because you're a coward Greg." she looked at Kim. "I want your help for a plan I made."

"Why on Earth do you think I will agreed ?" asked the chubby girl.

Did they are negociating ? We don't negociate. Fuck off. Fuck off. Gregory tried to took her phone, but Jessy moved backwards easily.

"Come on Kim. You're a nuisance. I'm a nuisance. We can do something big together. But firstly, you should join the team Gregory, I heard the signal of the beginning of the match."

The lad hesitated. Fuck you. Both of you. I'm trapped now... He left them, enraged, and ran towards the field.

Embolden by the mixture, Gregory did quite a good match. He scored two time, as much as Raphaël, and their team won 4-1. However, he was worried about Jessy and Kim alliance. They were both fucking bitches, and he feared a noxious plan. During the party Finn organized for the after match, he felt a little paranoid. Plus, his body quivered, demanding more energy than usual to hold on his feet. Jeezus, I consumed more than I expected during this match. The montlhy check-up was Monday, and he was convinced he gained a lot of muscle mass. But right now, he needed some supply. Drinking beer after beer, he was constantly eating, until 3:00. Then, he left the party bloated, feeling heavy and sick. Holy shit, what is happening to me ? His belly was gurgling in pain, and he had some difficulties to walk. Moreover, he felt exhausted despite his stuffing session. Slowly, he headed towards his house, but did not reached it. Groggy, he fell onto the sidewalk. What is happening ? My stomach hurt so much... He vomited without even noticed. His whole body shivered. I need help. His thoughts was clouded. He never ate and drank that much. And he never consumed a mixture like Kim's one before. His hands tried, with much effort, to rub his distended tummy. Around him, there was nothing. The city block was sleeping. In a food-coma, drowsy, he tried to get up, but failed. It hurt. Please, help me. He cried, like a stupid kid, afraid. He was alone, in pain, and nobody would help him. He fell asleep, despite the pain. The only thing he heard was Raphaël cold tone, telling him how much this mixture was harmful for his body. And then, he reached the realm of the dreams.

To be continued

Gregory met the badest girl of them all... Where it will lead ? In the same time, Shirley is struggling with Kilian (I like this kiddo) and Dan... At least there is Liam, without any problem, who help us to understand a bit more Raphaël. I think I love them both ! :) See you soon (I hope) for the next part !

#hsg #the high school game #My Story #part 15 #kilian's family #Gregory is slowly letting himself go #Kim I hate you #WG #weight gain #stuffing

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sawson · 7 years

Text

Spiritale Chapter 51

2,280 words

Chapter 51: Welcome Back

In the Lounge…

“I’m glad you guys have gotten together”, Chara said happily sitting at a table with new friends.

“I never thought I get more than one family member, now I have two”, Astigmatism said happily moving their legs in their seat, “Oh man we are SO going to make some sweet new dance moves”, they said looking at Reaper Bird.

“Roooobbit~!”, Final Froggit said joyfully sitting next to Reaper Bird.

“Heheheee~!”, Awww Whimsalot giggles hugging Reaper Bird’s head.

Reaper Bird flaps their wings and cheers being back with their family, aaawww pure joy.

In Waterfall…

“My beloved brother, how I missed you!”, Lemon Bread says hugging Aaron.

Aaron was too busy crying in Lemon Bread’s arms to say anything.

“Hi y’all, what is with all this commotion~!”, You all heard Shyren say swimming or uh flying in, “…Wait…can it be?”, she said seeing Lemon Bread.

Shyren examines Lemon Bread before asking them to do a pose, she preformed a fabulous flex pose in front of all of you.

“AAAAHHH Shyre, it’s you~!”, Shyren said moving around Lemonbread, “I missed you so much guuuurl~ ;3!”

Lemon Bread then recognized Shyren and hugged her getting jelly on her face, Shyren didn’t mind a bit. She shook it off and admire the smell. Now all they need to do is find Moldbygg.

In Snowdin by Muffet’s Cafe…

“Grandpa!”, Dogamy and Dogaressa shouted holding Endogeny’s cheeks.

“Dad!”, Doggo shouted hugging Endogeny.

Lesser Dog and Greater Dog are hugging and snuggling on Endogeny’s back. They said the same thing your dog friends said.

Somewhere outside Snowdin….

“Jer….rrr….y!”, Jerry’s mom said walking over her son with her arms out.

“…*Gasp*…Mom….MOM!!!”, Jerry shouted running over to his mom with his arm out, “Mom it’s you, it’s really really you!”, he said hugging her with a big smile.

“Honey!”, Jerry’s Dad shouted running over to his wife and hugged her, “Oh man, it’s a miracle!”

“What are you guys going to do now?”, Chara asked with a smile.

“Oooh, we’re going to sit over the fireplace, drink hot coco, and tell jokes and stories!”, Jerry’s dad said looking at Chara, “Haha, just like the good old days!”, He said walking with his family.

“Mom let me tell you about the new friends I made”, Jerry said walking.

“Oooh….joy….”, Jerry’s mom said holding her family’s hands.

It was sooo sweet seeing the Amalgamates with their families again, you love how the monsters don't care about the Amalgamates looks. Very very sweet creatures. Now that this is done you need to tell Chara abo- *Ding Ding* wha? Chara pulled their phone out. Looks like they got a text message from…an unknown person? It says: “Help! The queen is in trouble!”

“*GASP*”, Chara run quickly with their phone in their hand.

Oh boy, you better catch up!

A couple minutes later….

“Aaaah….what was with that elevator?”, Chara said walking out feeling off balanced, “Was it always that fast?”

“Don’t know, but at least we’re here”, You said feeling the same surprisingly.

“You’re right!”, Chara said realized where they were, “Come on!”, they said running.

You both ran into the Throne room and didn’t see Toriel. Ran into the other room or place, still wasn’t here either. All that’s left is….phew, she’s here. In the Barrier room.

“Hmm,oh child you are here”, Toriel said looking behind her, “If you are here because all your business has been handle?”, she asked turning around.

“No I…I got a text saying,….are you okay?”

“Why yes”, Toriel asked looking confused, “I came in here when I finished reading that book and sent the rest back to the library”

You already know where this is going, but you won’t say anything. After a few conversations Chara was brought into battle. Same words and same look of expressions, only this time Chara was not determined.

“Little one…I’m sorry we couldn’t spent time with one another,…fair well”

“SSTOOOOOP!!!”, You all heard someone shout….ASGORE!

“A…Asgore?!”, Toriel said with a low surprised tone.

“Please Toriel you don't have to do this”, Asgore begged walking closer to Chara, “This child is too innocent to get involve”

“Why?”, Toriel said with a low tone, “WHY ARE YOU HERE?!!”

“I-I-I got a message saying this child was in danger, so I came here”, Asgore answered nervously, “But you…you don’t have to hurt them, we can take care of this child toget-

“NO!!!”, Toriel shouted turning around, “How? HOW CAN YOU BE OKAY BEING AROUND ME?! After everything I did, you still don’t hate me! How can you even look at me?!”

“Toriel please calm down”, Asgore pleaded, “I know you were angry and-

“Just one…I could have gone through the barrier after I gotten one soul”, Toriel said cutting Asgore off then started crying, “taken six souls, then come back and freed everyone. But instead…I made everyone live in despair because I was too selfish to do that”

Yyyiiikes! You know Toriel was harsh, but seeing her being harsh to herself….it’s down right heartbreaking.

“Uuuh Toriel, you don't have to be too hard on yourself”, Chara said holding their shirt with one hand and holding one hand out.

“They’re right”, Asgore agreed, “But if you want, do you think we can at least be friends?”

“No Asgore!”, Toriel shouted crying.

Ooooouch, you felt that! Just like last time.

“Rahhhhhh!!!”, You all heard someone shout super loud, “Queen Toriel I’m here! I’m…ah…”

“Oh hello there, nice to meet you”, Asgore greeted kindly, “My name is Asgore, I hope I’m not intruding”

“Uh no no, it’s okay. It’s nice to meet you too”, Alphys said smiling and waving her hands, “I’m just gonna uh…you know”, she said walking over to Toriel.

“Please do”, Asgore said softly nodding his head.

“Toriel…are you going to be okay?”, Alphys asked gently placing her hand on Toriel’s back.

“Hello?! Is everyone okay?!”, You heard someone else say…Undyne, “Napstabot and I came here as fast as we could!”, she said looking worried.

“Why hello you two”, Asgore greeted again gently waving his hand, “What brings you here?”

“We got a text and dash on over here”, Napstabot said placing his arms on his waist, “And I have to say, purple looks great on you bro”, he complemented with a snap and a grin.

“Thank you, how kind”

“Excuse me, sorry”, Undyne said walking to Alphys and Toriel, “Alphys, is that who I think it is?”, you heard Undyne whisper.

Alphys nods her head while patting Toriel’s back, Undyne made a sad face and started comforting Toriel.

“Did we arrive on time?!” You heard…oh Sans and Papyrus are here, “Queen Toriel, are you alright?!”, Sans asked worried.

“She’s right there bro”, Papyrus said calmly pointing, “I told you not to trust that text”, he said knocking the ashes from his cigarette.

“Wait…which one is the real Queen, there’s two of them”, Sasn asked confused.

“That one bro”, Papyrus said pointing again to Toriel.

“Hey guys!”, Chara greeted running over to the skelebros.

“Human!”, Sans said waving, “Tell me, who’s that guy? The one who looks like the Queen?”, he asked whispering.

“Little one, are these friends of yours?”, Asgore asked walking beside Chara.

“Uh huh~!”, Chara said nodding happily.

“AH HA, I’ve figured it out!”, Sans said out of no where, “You…are the Queen’s long lost twin brother, that’s why you two look alike!”, he said pointing

….Haha…hahaha…ahahahaha! We started laughing hahaha!

“What’s so funny?”, Sans asked confused.

“*Sigh* You must be the Magnificent Sans your brother has told me so much about”

“Wowzers, really!? What has he been saying?!”, Sans asked with those happy starry eyes.

“How your super energetic, helpful, and very kind to others”

“Awww hahaha, well that’s all very true”, Sans said blushing and looking proud.

“He also says you really like puns, even though you pretend not too”

“Pa-PAPYRUS!!!!”

“*Whistles*”, Haha Papyrus is looking the other way.

“Aaaw I hope this day doesn’t get any worse”, Sans said rubbing his head.

“It’ll be alright Toriel”, You heard Alphys say, “You’ll find another rare special someone”

“Y-yes, Alphys’s totally right abut that rare someone”, Undyne said, “Just like how I found mind”, Aaww Undyne's hugging Alphys.

“Okay stop beating the beat and kiss already, the audience HAS needs sweetness”

“Napstabot you have your radio on?!”, Undyne shouted nervously.

“Yea girl, you know I can’t mute my peeps”, Napstabot said crossing his arms.

“You know what, yea! LET’S DO IT!”, She shouted bringing Undyne in her arms.

HOLY COW SHE KISSED HER!!! You covered your eyes just before it happened, you are blushing right now!

“That’s right my peeps, true love at it’s finest!”, Napstabot said playing some romantic music.

“Papyrus hey, what’s going on?!”, You heard Sans shout.

You poke your eyes out to see what happened, Papyrus is covering Sans’s eyes and so did Asgore with Chara. Eyes uncovered you all saw Undyne look knocked out and wow, she turned purple hahaha. She is blushing hard, you all giggled. Even Toriel did the same. Alphy gently put Undyne down.

“Well child it looks like you might been staying for a while, but you’ve made a lot of wonderful friends”, Asgore said smiling at Chara, “I think you’ll be happy here”, he said rubbing Chara’s head.

Chara smiles happily at him.

“By the way, you all came here for the Queen right?”, Alphys questioned, “Anyone know who sent that text?”

“Oh I know who it is!”, Sans said rising his hand, “It’s from a talking toy I know!”

“…What?!”, Chara and Papyrus said at the same time.

“Wait….do y-y-ou mean?”, Toriel said.

*Crumble* Hey what’s that soun-WHOOA!!! Chara’s friends were surrounded by large crystals that trapped them in place, they can’t move!

“HaHhaa U DumYS!”, Temmie said appearing, “WHiLe U hAd yOur liTe Pal-WaL…i tok thE hooman SoLS!”, they said with a demonic smile.

“Rrrrraaah when I get out of here you’re going to be sorry you little rat!”, Alphys shouting trying to break free, “Wha…why can’t I summon my trident?!”

“My crySTal StOpS yOur MaGIC U dUmB DInO, NoW aLL yOur soLS bEloNG To mE, hEE hEE hEE~”, Temmie winking at Alphys making her really mad, “aLL oF youR soLS bELoNG 2 Me nOW HahHhaHaHAh!”, they said with their demonic smile…*gasp* all the monster appeared in crystal cages!

“Temmie please don’t hurt them”, Chara begged with a worried face.

“WeL…tHiS iS aLL YoUr FaUlt AfTER aLL”, Temmie said taunted, “iF U Did’NT Mak thEM LuV U, Non oF tHiS woUlD HapEn!

“What does that have to do with this?! Why are you even doing ANY of this them? They never did anything bad to you!”

“U dOn’T GeTS iT, dOn’T U? tHiS iS aLL a SiMplE GaMe”, Temmie answered, “AnD iF U FiNish tHiS GaMe U’ll WiN, ThEN U WoN’t PlAy WitH mE nO MorE. sssOOOO…tHiS GaMe WiL bE EnDlesS, AnD U’ll KeEP LoSiN and LoSiN No MaTER HoW CloS U R 2 VicTory~! AgAin, aND AgAin, hEE hEE aND AgAin HAhAHAhAhAhA!!!”

“I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU’RE GAME, JUST LET MY FRIENDS GO!”

“OoOOh FEistY R U, K….bEAt mE aND i GiV ThEM BacK”, Temmie said with a cute smile, “hECK…i’LL EvEN GiV U yOuR “hApY EndING” aND BrEAK tHE BARRieR”

“…Okay”, Chara said with an unsure face while holding their shirt.

“Too BaD~”

“What?! AH!”, Chara’s been trapped!

“NoW i cAN kEEp U HeR, No maTeR HoW mANy TimES I kiL U!”

NOO!!! Chara’s down to their last life! You won’t just stand here!

*You are filled with DETERMINATION, you jump in front of Chara and- suddenly flames destroy the Temmie’s shards….?*

“WhA thE…?!”

“Don’t…give in….child”, Asgore said looking tired, “No matter what happens…we’ll…be there for you”

“HoW R U uSiNG MaGIC?!”, Temmie shouted looking back at Asgore, “HmpH iT DoES MaTeR, U woN’T bE uSinG aNYMorE AnYWAY!”, they said shaking their head and tried attacking Chara again.

*Both Sans and Alphys attack blocks Temmie’s shards*

“Don’t underestimate us you rag doll”, Alphys said giving Temmie a serious look.

“That’s right! Human I know you an beat them!”(), Sans cheered, “Believe in yourself, that’s what I would do!”

“It…may look impossible…”, Undyne said with their head down, “But…I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT, NAPSTABOT NOW!!!”, she shouted bring to her head up with a determined face.

“You got it girl!”

*Napstabot drops the beat on those shards, they shatter*

“GrrRRr, STop iT aLL oF U!!!”, Temmie shouted summoning twice the amount of shards to Chara.

*Flames appear and burn all the shards*

“Human…for the sake of your kind and ours….stay…determined…!”, Toriel said looking tired.

*All the monsters cheer and reach out to heal Chara, it fills you with DETERMINATION!*

“UrrRgH…n-No! UnThInkablE! tHiS…c-C-caN’t bE HapeniNG!”, Temmie said, “U…aLL oF U…complete IDIOTS!

*The crystals holding the monsters begin the shine bright colors, all the monsters are being absorbed!*

“ALL OF YOUR SOULS ARE MIIINNNE!!!!”

You cover your eyes from the bright light using your arms……..you opened your eyes and,….there they are.

“..Ffrisk….?”, Chara said getting up, “What happen-….*soft gasp*”, they asked walking up to you and stopped.

“……Finally…I was so sick of being that toy”, They said moving their hands and arms then turned around, “Hi there…Frisk….are you there? It’s me, your best friend…ASRIEL DREEMURR!!!”

(Sorry for so much dialog in this chapter people)

#spiritale #undertale #undertale fanfiction #underSwap #underswap chara #frisk #underswap amalgamate #underswap monsters #underswap sans #underswap papyrus #underswap undyne #underswap asgore #underswap alphys #underswap toriel #underswap temmie #underswap asriel #fanfic #fanficiton #so many characters

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devils-gatemedia · 7 years

Text

Who said let’s have a quiet Sunday night in? I’ll tell who didn’t: a near-capacity crowd at the O2 ABC Glasgow for Monster Truck and The Picturebooks. Originally scheduled for Glasgow’s King Tuts, the gig sold out in a matter of minutes. The decision was made to switch the gig to the ABC, a venue with quadruple the capacity. This proved to be an inspired move.

So first up were The Picturebooks from Gütersloh, Germany, with an alternative Rock-Blues sound, featuring Fynn Claus Grabke (vocals and guitar), and Phillipp Mirtschink (drums). Bang goes the quiet Sunday, as the almost tribal sound of Mirtschink’s drums fills the air, followed by deep riffs from Grabke, and the guys launch into ‘PCH Diamond’, then ‘Wardance’, and we’re off and running in Glasgow. The swelling crowd are soon in a trance-like state as The Picturebooks continue through their set with ‘Zero Fucks Given’, a catchy little number the punters seem to appreciate. A combination of sleigh bells, cow bells and a heavy drum beat from Mirschink, coupled with Grabke’s powerful vocals and his wizardry with the guitar and effects pedals soon lead to crowd participation. I always think if a band can command this, they’ve found a winning formula for the rest of the night. Grabke says having played to as little as 4 or 5 people in the early part of their career, the chance to play on this tour to huge crowds made all those early gigs well worth the effort. The guys proved that hard work from the early days of your career does pay off. The Picturebooks have played Glasgow’s King Tuts previously and will be returning to Glasgow later in the year, date and venue still to be confirmed. On tonight’s showing, a good turnout should easily be achieved.

The Picturebooks set list: PCH Diamond, Wardance, Zero Fucks Given, I Need That Oooh, Bad Habits Die Hard, Cactus, Learn It The Hard Way, The Rabbit And The Wolf, Your Kisses Burn Like Fire.

The crowd are nicely warmed up as tonight’s headliners, Monster Truck, appear on stage. From a blue-collar background in Ontario, Canada, these guys are no strangers to hard work. They’ve been touring over the last four years, both as headliners, and supporting the likes of Alice In Chains and Nickelback. Add to this their studio work for the “Furiosity” and “Sittin’ Heavy” albums, like an 18-wheeler, this Monster Truck is in full throttle. The band has a saying “Don’t Fuck with the Truck“, and tonight, no one dared!

The powerful voice of Jon Harvey easily fills the large ABC hall, and his solid bassline keeps the big truck on track, ably assisted by Steve Kiely (drums). Jeremy Widerman roams the stage like a grizzly bear foraging for food, laying down big riffs and backing vocals time after time with ease. Throw in Brandon Bliss (keyboards), and the rock and blues these guys play is up there with the best in the business.Chuck in those infectious choruses, and they have a winning combination. The set starts rolling with ‘Why are you not rocking?’. Glasgow crowds are not slow on the uptake and are soon singing along. Widerman’s energy is relentless. He storms around the stage bare-chested with an uncanny resemblance to Angus Young in his early years, but in jeans instead of shorts. Harvey reminds the crowd that the band loves playing Glasgow and has never been let down thus far: tonight is no exception. The Glasgow crowd cheers and starts singing along as the band strikes up ‘For The People’. The audience is enveloped in the true rock and blues style of Monster Truck throughout the set, and all too soon Harvey announces “This is our last song” and ‘New Soul’ fills the air. So, goodnight Glasgow, it seems, as the band leaves the stage…

“One more tune!” chants the crowd, and to the delight of the packed hall, the band returns and perform… three more. The fans help out with the choruses and some crowd surfing in appreciation. Well it would be rude not to! Sadly, the night does come to an end, but rest assured, Monster Truck will be wheeling back in to town on their next tour.

Monster Truck set list: ‘Why Are You Not Rocking’, ‘Old Train’, ‘Don’t Tell Me How To Live’, ‘The Enforcer’, ‘She’s a Witch’, ‘Black Forest’, ‘For The People’, ‘Things Get Better’, ‘For The Sun’, ‘Seven Sea Blues’, ‘Sweet Mountain River’, ‘New Soul’.

Encore:-‘Call It A Spade’, ‘Righteous Smoke’, ‘The Lion’.

Review and images: Dave Jamieson

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Live Review: Monster Truck – ABC, Glasgow Who said let's have a quiet Sunday night in? I'll tell who didn't: a near-capacity crowd at the O2 ABC Glasgow for Monster Truck and The Picturebooks.

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sawson · 7 years

Text

Spiritale Chapter 36

1,754 words

Chapter 36: Grillby

A few minutes later…

“Okay I got one”, Chara said from behind Papyrus’s back, “Where does a cow like to hang out?”

“The moovies?”, Papyrus asked holding Chara while walking.

“Yea, I hear sales are over the moon”

“Hahah, those days are better then udders”

“Hehehe yea, sometimes it’s an udder disaster!”

“Hhhahaha, okay I better put you down before you drop another pun on me”, Papyrus said kneeling down.

“Aaww, were my jokes too heavy for you?”, Chara asked getting off Papyrus back.

“Nope”, Papyrus said standing up”, You had very light material”

“HAHAHahhaha….maaan, these jokes are cheesy!”, Chara laughed while keeping themselves up.

“Looks like you had too much, you better not get seconds”

Hahahaha…man he needs to stop, it’s hahah…too much…*Breathes*. Hahah…you’re so glad Papyrus gave Chara a piggyback ride and 4 bottles of cold water. Phew, looks like we’re near the elevator. You and Chara take some deep breaths, this Papyrus is a pro like your Sans. He’ll have you both laughing none stop.

“Here we are kid”, Papyrus said walking to the elevator, “I better get out of here, been off break for a while and I need to get back to Snowdin”

“True, I don’t want my coool friend getting too hot “, Chara said winking and pointing to Papyrus.

Papyrus just fold his arms and shook his head while smiling, you can tell he’s trying to hold back his laugh.

“Eeeeh…eeeh…come on, come on you know it’s funny”, Chara said smiling, pointing, and tilting their head.

Then he disappeared without saying a word.

“Did…he just leave me hanging?”

“Man that was cold, guess he couldn’t handle the heat”, You said smiling.

“HAHAHA- ow!”, Chara said holding their head with one hand, “Okay that’s enough for now”

You nod, you’re head is hurting from smiling and laughing too much. That…made you both somewhat tired. Good thing the elevator has an air conditioner…Pheeeew. Then the doors opened and a wave of warmth hit our faces….Chara is feeling tired now, but still goes on. *Sniffs* wooow *Sniff* it smells like fast food, you wonder what’s cooking? Oooh my goooosh….is that Grillby?!……!

“Come one come all to the cookout of cookouts”, Grillby shouted, “You there!”, he shouted pointing to Chara.

“Uh y-yes!”

“You look like you could use a variety of goods, come over here and pick a your variety”, Grillby insist.

Chara walks on over the Grillby’s table and saw a lot of food, you’re more focused about what Grillby was wearing. A bright blue suit, a pink sash and bow tie, even wearing swirly glasses. It’s up beat and lively unlike your Grillby’s who was calm and steady like a….oh the irony of it all.

“Can I try the onion rings sir?”, Chara asked pointing.

“You suuure can~!”, Grillby said giving them the onion rings in the fancy way, “That’ll be 18g”, he said pointing with his hand to the clear jar.

18g? Dang that’s cheap! Huh? You over the corner of your eye and saw the harpy monster! Whoa, she is reeeally enjoying those fries. And so is Chara, they are in complete glee. Grillby was just as happy as his customers are. Chara walked over to the harpy and asked if they could have one of their fries, she asked for an onion ring in exchange.

“Mmmmm~”, Chara said eating the fry.

“I…*Gulps* I know right!”, the harpy said, “They sooo good I…I might just get another, but I better get some water first”

Chara gladly gave her one of their water bottles, she was soooo thankful. She flew back over the Grillby and ordered some more fries heheh, I guess you and Chara are off.

“Awww man, not another arrow puzzle”, Chara complained.

“Don’t worry this one is less difficult, but the shooting puzzle is more tricky here”, you tell Chara, “I’ll show you where you gotta go”

26 minutes later….

“*Coughs*…There’s so much smoke here”, Chara covering their mouth with their shirt.

“Look Chara a save point”, You said pointing.

“Why here of all places?”, Chara said walking up to it.

You shrugged. Wait you know this place…this is where your Muffet and her spiders lived, but now it’s home to these flames. You saw lava in the rock ground and the background as you walk through the place. You hear whispers.

“Look at that, it’s a human”, you hear a flame say.

“Like the one we’ve heard about long ago?”

“Looks like them, they’re even wearing a striped shirt”

“I heard they like to use fire to hurt others”

“I heard they watch as they get burned”

“And I heard….that they’re verrry greedy”, You heard Grillby say with his back turned, “Nnnooow, let’s see who this human we’ve heard sooo much about”, he said turning around.

Chara rubs their arms looking scared.

“Wait a moment…I know you, you’re the one who bought one of our quality goods” Grillby said leaning forward with their hands on their hips, “In fact we’ve got a telegram saying a striped shirt fellow bought something from the mini sale. What was it that you bought exactly?”, he asked with one hand on his hip and the other on his chin.

“It was tomato soup, It was really hot”

“Why thank you~!”, Grillby said with both hands together and placed on his cheek, “However, just because you bought a few things doesn’t mean you can leave so easily”, he said pointing with one hand and folding his arms.

“I figured”, Chara said under their breath sadly, “But I don't want to fight you guys”

“A human that won’t fight? Interesting”, Grillby said rubbing their chin, “Well…let’s still see how you fair in the heat of battle”, he said pulling some kind of pot and cup from behind him.

Chara was brought into battle and wasn’t happy about it. You looked at what Grillby was holding…it looks like a pot, but it’s got a little spout and a handle. And the cup he’s holding is a little longer then a regular cup. Hmmm.

“No need to be so blue, my little friend~”, Grillby said pouring-what is that tomato soup?!, “There, that’ll warm things up”

The soup…burned through the rock around Chara, now they’re surrounded by lava! Chara’s soul turned light purple, wait light purple?

“You’ve caught me in a good mood human, normally your soul would turn a perfect purple”, Grillby sitting on a chair the flames brought, “Nevertheless, have fun my friend”, he said crossing his legs.

“Wwwha-AH!”

*Chara dodges the flames by jumping from one narrow rock line to the other*

“Lovely work there~”, Grillby said clapping, “But that’s only the beginning, hope you can stomach the rest”

Oh my gosh, huh…oh one of the flames is trying to show Chara the next attack. You quickly show Chara, they pretend they didn’t see anything to not blow their cover. Niiice, oh incoming!

*Chara dodges onion rings and flames, they smell tasty*

“Hmm…I discovered what is missing”, Grillby said standing, “Music! Bring in the radio”, he said clapping his hands.

*The flames bring a radio wrapped cloth that is fireproof, Grillby puts on some fireproof gloves and turns the dial*

“That’s more like it~!”, Grillby said happily as the music plays, “Let the battle continue”, he said with one hand behind his back and the other in the air.

*Chara dodges more flames, onion rings, and….curvy pigs in a blanket?*

*Chara wipes the sweat off from their face*

“Astounding, truly astounding!”, Grillby said clapping, “Oh my how can I be so selfish, I forgot to introduce you to my pet”

*Grillby stomps on the ground and the lava starts to shake*

*Out pops a….a l-lave c-c-centipede….almost looking like a wavy french fry…good gosh*

*Chara dodges the centipede, however, it takes out part of the ground Chara was on*

*Chara continues dodging, but the centipede continues destroying the ground*

*Chara is out of ground to dodge, the centipede corners them*

“Goodness gracious!”, Grillby said covering their mouth, “How will you get out?!”, he said leaning front in his chair.

*The centipede slowly moves in toward Chara, they look at them as they shiver in fear*

*Chara moves a little to the right and the centipede follows, then to the left and they still follow*

*Chara slowly moves their shoulder, the centipede moves along with them*

*Chara moves their arms and claps along with a music, the centipede begins dancing with them*

“Now THAT is more like it!”, Grillby shouted standing up quickly and pointing to Chara, “Everyone get up and join the dance~!”

*Chara was spared and brought into the party*

The flames brought some large rocks and melted them together creating a path for Chara to cross, as they crossed the flames and the centipede danced with glee.

“You’re not leaving so soon are you”, Grillby said jumping in front of Chara, “The party has just begun, take my hand~”, he said leaning a glove covered hand.

“Uuuuh”

“Don’t worry, it won’t burn you”

Chara gently took Grillby's hand, oh thank goodness it didn’t burn them. Grillby quickly swing Chara along with the music, they had a hard time keeping up with him. Looks like fun.

14 minutes later…

“Byyye, and thanks for the party~!”, Grillby said happily waving goodbye, “Come back any tiiime~!”

“Yyyeeaa…”, Chara said slowly walking away and waving.

A really tired Chara walked out the hottest part of Hotland and into the area where Napstabot’s play would be. They quickly fell to the ground under the poster on the wall, you know it’s ‘cause of the overexposure to heat. You look at the posters showing Napstabot on it, it says “An action packed musical! The gang vs. the cops, who will win?! Tune in to find out! *Ring* *Ring*

“He…llo?”, Chara said answering gasping for breath.

“Hey human!”, you heard Sans say.

“Hi Sans”, Chara said tiredly.

“Are you okay?”

“Yea…just tired now, really tired”

“If you need some energy, I can give you this soup I found”

“…Wait, what soup?”, Chara said sitting up.

“This yummy tomato soup I found beside my frozen plate of tacos, it’s hot though”

“….You can have it…it’s all yours dude”

“Okay then, oh I got to go now. Bye!”, Sans said hanging up.

…..Chara lays on the ground in silence.

#spiritale #undertale #undertale fanfiction #underSwap #underswap grillby #underswap papyrus #puns #underswap chara #frisk #fanfic #fanficiton

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