#now idk if they meant it to be blood on his chin in the photo but i like how bloodier u made it....... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mythicamagic · 3 years

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As usual... I can never just choose one... soo here are my top choices you choose one. Lol

1. Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?

2. The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.

3.that ship has sailed. i’ve had my one great love already

4. we’re just…friends.” “friends don’t do this type of shit!

5. Did you just slap my ass?” / “Actually, I firmly grasped it.”

Why did I decide 2 of the hurt/sad/angst.. idk.. i suppose im glutton for punishment. Dont hurt me too bad if you choose to do one of them myth.

Decided to do a part two for - this ask.

I chose; The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I’m still in love with you.

---

The air felt crisp and clean, biting at Kagome's cheeks as she wound her scarf tighter around her neck. Winter markets were so much fun. The vast array of cute little items on display made warmth light up her chest, even as the candy and children's toys reminded her of a certain fox she'd left behind in the past.

Kagome smiled at Ayumi as she prattled on about something or other.

She shouldn't feel guilty. Shippo had barely visited the village in the last year she'd been there. Everyone had moved on. Including herself, somewhat. She'd been so wrapped up in her whirlwind romance with a certain Daiyoukai- the feudal era had been irreparably damaged as a home for her the second they'd broken up.

But she missed her friends. Dearly.

She shook herself. It was too late to go back on her choice now. The well had sealed shut for good.

Ayumi stopped to grab some hot chocolate from a street vendor, allowing Kagome a moment to warm her hands, rubbing them together.

Snowflakes gently danced about like powdered sugar, kissing Kagome's face as she turned- almost bumping face-first into a muscular chest. Fresh scents of wild forests and thunderstorms filled her nose, and she stiffened.

He smells the same.

Kagome bit the inside of her cheek, blue eyes narrowing. "Don't think I don't know what you're doing."

"Haven't the faintest idea of what you mean," he arranged his features into mild innocence, which was near impossible due to his smiling eyes.

"Riiight," she muttered, wishing Ayumi would hurry up.

Sesshoumaru gazed down at her, a pink gift bag in hand. Kagome grit her teeth, hating that she wondered who it was meant for.

"I did not intend to run into you here, before you accuse me of anything," his silky voice caressed her hearing once more. It sounded so lulling, designed to draw her back in. "Did you take my gift home with you or did you throw it away?" he asked, deceptively casually.

"Home. But don't think that means anything- it's not the plant's fault you're trying to worm your way back into my life."

The Daiyouki smiled to himself, obviously absurdly pleased. He began pursuing the street vendor's items right beside her, gazing at children's toys with a touch of gentleness in his steady gaze. Kagome was prepared to ignore him- until he leaned down, breath fanning 'accidentally' over her cheek as he picked up a doll and straightened.

"Do you remember Rin? And the other children-"

"Don't," Kagome said, unable to move away. She hated the thrumming of her skin so much. The way it cried out. Hated him.

Her skin flared alive, body humming with hunger. Like a shot of adrenalin to the heart, Kagome dipped her chin into her scarf to try and mask her escalating breathing due to his proximity. When they'd had sex- so many years ago- it hadn't been like human lovemaking.

He'd wired new pathways within her system via his youki. Sometimes she felt like it still lived inside her, having made a home for itself. They hadn't mated, but she felt irreversibly changed by it.

Kagome made a faint noise, squeezing her eyes shut.

Resist him-

"Kagome?"

Oh thank God.

"Ayumi, let's go," she said abruptly, facing her friend with an urgent look in her eyes.

Ayumi tilted her head slightly, eyeing Sesshoumaru curiously. "A-alright?"

"You do not need to leave," he turned, exuding a magnanimous air. "I am the one who intruded on your time, please continue," he gestured to the market, ensnaring Kagome's gaze with his own. Unblinking, unable to hide his more animalistic habits even after so many years.

"I hope to see you some other time when my presence does not disturb you," he said softly, walking away.

---

When entering work that Saturday, Kagome could already sense the buzz in the air. Someone had generously donated some priceless artefacts to their museum. The previously undiscovered finds that shaken everyone due to their rarity and mint condition. No one could stop talking about it.

Kagome's blood ran cold the second the items in question were described to her. Pushing through the crowd that had gathered, she stared in horror at the display case.

Itching for a fight, she immediately stormed to his office downtown, opening the door to reception and letting herself in. "Is Sesshoumaru here?" she burst, stopping in front of the secretary's desk.

"Mr Taisho?" the woman blinked, obviously thrown by the petite, angry miko currently glaring at her and using his name so informally. "Do you have an appointment?"

"No. Just tell him Kagome is here."

She was let into his office soon enough, trying to keep a lid on her crackling reiki. Sesshoumaru glanced up from his computer. "Miko? What a pleasant surprise."

Kagome slammed an article atop his desk. "What the hell is wrong with you?" she snapped.

He raised a brow, briefly flicking his attention to the contents. A photo of red and white silks, coupled with polished spiked armour sat in a display unit. "Something wrong? It was just a donation, given in good faith."

"Donated to my workplace!" Kagome seethed, groaning and burying her face in her hands. "Don't you realise I'm going to have to see your things now every day? I've worn those clothes! I've slept in them as pyjamas! Are you trying to mess with me because you want me back?"

"That's a little dramatic, dear one, I'm not trying to 'mess with you.' It was just a donation," he rose from his seat, face inches from hers. "And if I wanted to romance you, I'd go about it much differently."

"Don't 'dear one' me," she snapped. "You could've donated that stuff years ago- or to a different museum. But no, you had to give it to mine."

"My gift was not meant to distress you, but," he rounded the table slowly, fingers dragging over the wood. "It does make me worry, seeing you so worn thin. Is something else going on? Separate from...us?"

Kagome stiffened, avoiding eye contact. Things with her boyfriend had been strained as of late, and the Daiyoukai's sudden appearance back into her life wasn't helping matters.

"There is no 'us.' I'm frustrated and exhausted, that's all. Don't make things even more complicated by asking about that stuff."

Sesshoumaru lingered close, and Kagome didn't shy away. The one person she couldn't bear to be near was also the only being who could offer some semblance of comfort to her due to his familiarity.

"This one meant to give you something," reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a business card, handing it over. Kagome immediately froze, staring at the name. "You miss him," Sesshoumaru murmured. "The kit lives in Kyoto now with his wife and children. Call him."

Tears pricked her eyes, and Kagome bowed her head. Full lips crumpled into a wobbly line.

"If there is something I regret more than our parting, it is that you felt compelled to leave. The fault lies with me."

Shaking her head, a saddened laugh bubbled up her throat. "It was my decision to break up, and it was my decision to leave the Feudal Era. Don't...blame yourself for that part."

"You did not do anything wrong," a long-fingered hand reached out, blunt nails losing their glamour. Sharp claws stroked dark curling hair back from her neck. Kagome's breathing hitched. "When we were together- you did not do anything wrong. We were both so young. It was foolish of me to act as I did, but I think it is now... that we are in the right place for something more."

Kagome shivered, body warming to him. Intuitively, the brush of fingers on her neck made her foolishly anticipate a kiss- sorely disappointed when it didn't come. "I'm not," she forced herself to say. Seeing the disappointment darken his brown eyes, she sighed. "I miss you," Kagome admitted quietly, turning away to escape from his touch. "I miss how... we were. I'm terrified of that, though. I was...under the impression we'd be together. Permanently. Then you had to go and tell me you needed 'pure' heirs to continue the family bloodline."

She laughed bitterly, loosely holding her arms. "The worst thing is, that even after all of that, I'm still in love with you."

"You are frightened that I will hurt you again."

Kagome nodded mutely. She then forced a giggle, giving a weak smile. "Besides, you may not like me as I am now. I'm more jaded than before."

"I like what I see very much," moving closer once more as though experiencing a gravitational pull, he stopped inches away. "I have missed you too," he muttered quietly, genuinely. She could feel him inhale her scent through her hair. "Very much."

Her mouth suddenly became dry. "I'm with Natsuki-"

"Leave him," a rush of passion entered his voice as Sesshoumaru swept closer, backing her into the desk. The wood dug into her thighs, their hips meeting. "This one is not interested in being 'the other man' in an affair. Nor am I interested in watching you remain with someone less than ideal," he snorted, resting his hand over her wrist and grazing his thumb over it.

"Y-you don't know anything about it!"

"I could smell your scent. It was not bright and cheerful even before I re-entered your life the other day. His feels...murky on you. Unhappy."

Kagome swallowed thickly, glancing away. "Observant as ever," she admitted softly.

"Or perhaps you did a poor job of hiding it," backing off a little- he rested his hip next to hers beside the desk, remaining near but barely touching. And yet everything felt so close. "You've changed. But you're still the same at your core, miko," hot breath fanned over her neck, teeth ghosting over the shell of her ear. "If you permitted me, I would not be reckless with your heart again, as I was in my youth."

Her palms traitorously slid up, sliding over firm muscles- running across his chest. He felt warm. His heart was beating fast. Was he nervous? Such a thing sounded impossible.

She bit her lip, secretly longing for the sensation of silks under her hands again instead of the modern cotton of his shirt.

"I don't know that I believe you," Kagome met his gaze, rewarded with the golden glow of his eyes instead of human brown.

"I've gotta go," she said reluctantly, forcing herself to pull away. "I need to be at work."

"Very well," he hummed, unmoving. "But if you...need something. You know where to find me."

He sounded almost desperate for an excuse to talk with her. Giving a curt nod, she let herself out of his office with a long breath, shaking her head. Sesshoumaru's static youki haunted her steps for the remainder of the day.

#Sesskag #Sesshoumaru x Kagome #asks

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seokoloqy · 5 years

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Making Mistakes | kth (m)

➳ PAIRING: taehyung x y/n

➳ GENRE: smut, f2l, fuckboy!tae

➳ WORD COUNT: 2.1k

➳ WARNINGS: he takes pictures and videos (idk the term for that), fingering, dirty talk

➳ REQUEST: For the smut drabbles “I cant stop thinking about your hands on me” with taehyung please? + ‘You like that don’t you’ + taehyung

➳ A/N: this was a request that got a little too long + I combined it w another one so... anons, this is for you <33

—

You’ve been avoiding Taehyung like the plague as if he’ll infect you with the smallest touch. But truth be told, him touching you is all you can think about anymore. Ever since Saturday night at Hoseok’s party after you two had drunkenly slept together, he has invaded your thoughts.

You can barely look at him. Twelve years of friendship and it only took one night to ruin it all.

Since that fateful night, Taehyung has been sending you texts, blowing up your phone with calls, even swinging by your dorm between classes when he knows you’d be there. All his attempts to reach out to you have been ignored. You delete his texts, turn off your voicemail, and pretend you aren’t home by burying yourself underneath your covers and block out the sound of him pounding your door.

Did that night mean anything?

Feelings that lay dormant since sixth grade bubbled to the surface that night and you’re afraid that they’ll burst. You’ve kept them down for years, refusing to admit the truth to anyone. Now things are messy, now they’re complicated, now he wants to talk.

Taehyung has a track record for the most people slept with, most one night stands, most friends with benefits. That night was just one of the many he’s had and it probably meant nothing to him.

It was a mistake—a drunk, stupid mistake.

You bury your face into your hands, groaning just thinking about your best friend. It’s been three days without him and you’re starting to miss his bubbly presence around you.

You’ve thought about picking up your phone and giving him a call to sort things out, but your nerves just get in the way. Having to hear his raspy voice again would only remind you of how it felt against your skin, grunting curses and whispering your name.

“Fuck,” you mumble, falling back on to your bed. You grab your phone, wondering if he texted you again.

[Taehyung 10:27 PM] hey can we talk soon?

[Taehyung 10:34 PM] please stop ignoring me we should talk

[Seokjin 10:34 PM] come over movie night @ Namjoon’s place!! (ps bring snacks)

You debate on going. There’s a large possibility that you’ll run into Taehyung—your friends are his friends too. As you mull over it in your head, you choose to send a message back.

[You 10:35 PM] is Tae gonna be there?

[Seokjin 10:35 PM] no he said he can’t come. Studying.

[You 10:35 PM] ...okay b there in 20

—

The apartment is quiet, unusually quiet for movie night. As you knock the door, you hear shuffling and muffled whispers. It’s Jungkook who opens the door to greet you with a close-lipped smile.

“Hey,” he says, pulling the door wider to let you through. “We were just starting.”

As you slip your shoes off and turn the corner to the living room, you catch the unmistakable head of turquoise hair lounging on the couch facing away from you. Immediately, you pull Jungkook in front of you and whisper, “What the hell! Jin said Tae wouldn’t be here!”

“He changed his mind. What’s the big deal?”

“I have to go,” you panic, spinning towards the door to retreat back to your car to hide.

Jungkook grabs your arm, hauling you back. “No way! The movie is just starting.”

“Y/N.”

Jungkook releases your arm for you to turn and face Taehyung. You want to run, scream, maybe faint. God, you aren’t prepared for this at all.

“Hi,” you breathe, averting your eyes towards Jungkook for help, but he heads back to the couch instead. That leaves you and Taehyung, standing in the dark hall, alone.

“We have to talk.”

“I don’t think we should do this here.” The rest of the boys are only ten feet away, you don’t want anyone finding out. Who knows what kind of rift it would cause?

“Why not? Are you afraid the guys will hear about how we slept-”

You slap your hands over his mouth, abruptly cutting off the rest of his sentence. “Shh, not here!” You plead, looking around for a safer place to discuss things. You drag him to Namjoon’s room at the end of the hall, furthest away from the living room.

As you push him inside, you silently shut the door behind you. Taehyung flips the light switch and gives you an expectant look. He edges closer, leading you back until you’re touching the door.

“Tell me the truth,” he rasps, “Do you think it was a mistake?”

The proximity between your bodies is tempting. His hand crawls up your arm until he’s cupping your neck to make you look up. The heat radiating is enough to make you sweat.

“Yes,” you squeak, turning your head away from his, unable to look at him any longer. He leans his forehead against yours, lips only centimeters away from the corner of yours.

“I don’t believe you,” he growls, gripping your chin to force you to face him.

“What do you want me to say?” You whimper, trying to figure out what he’s asking for.

“I want you to tell me the truth,” he repeats, the intensity of his gaze becoming heavier with each second you stay silent.

Tell him the truth, you think. There’s no going back now. He has you cornered, literally, and won’t let you go until you confess.

You swipe your tongue across your lower lip, admitting, “F-Fine! If I tell you h-how I can’t stop thinking about your hands on me or how badly I want you again—will you give it up?” You screw your eyes shut, embarrassed by the words that tumbled out of your mouth without a second thought. “Fuck, I just-”

His lips roughly connect with yours as he cups your face in his hands, silencing you from saying anything more. You're startled by his action, confused but aroused by the determination he seems to hold into this kiss.

Your fingers comb their way through his blue locks and your other hand runs down the expanse of his chest to his navel. A spark travels through you as his tongue swipes across your lower lip. The familiar wetness between your legs as his hands slowly slide down to your back returns, reminding you of that night.

You’re not thinking, just feeling his hands making a path down the column of your spine as you arch into him naturally. As you press yourself against him, the apparent bulge in his jeans touches your core.

“Get on the bed,” he orders, peeling himself away from your clinging fingertips. His alluring gaze guides your feet over to the bed. You relax on Namjoon’s duvet, letting your hands run along the white peaks of his sheets.

Taehyung stalks over to you like a wolf catching prey with a lethal glint in his eyes. He’s out for flesh and blood with the desire to devour you whole.

“Lay back, baby, I’ll make you feel good,” he promises. You don’t doubt his abilities, feeling a rush of adrenaline flood your body as your head hits the pillows. “You remember how my fingers felt.”

You nod breathlessly, watching his hands move to unbutton your pants and slide them off, leaving just your white panties on.

He groans lowly, eyeing your legs, “God, you’re fucking-”

He doesn’t finish his sentence, instead choosing to dig into his back pocket to retrieve his sleek black phone. You raise your head at the sound of a click as he unlocks it.

“What are you doing?”

“Relax, these are for my eyes only. I’d never let anyone else see you like this because,” Taehyung swiftly pulls down your panties, eliciting a yelp from you, “this is all mine.”

He dips down to your glistening heat, pulling apart your thighs with his phone still clutched in one hand. He hungrily eyes your core, angling the phone before your pink folds and snapping a memorable photo for safe keeping. After a few more clicks, you feel his prodding finger run up your entrance, gathering a drop of your juices.

You whine, pleading for something more, “Tae, please.”

Taehyung absentmindedly runs his finger up and down, watching as you squirm. “Can I record you too?” He asks, sucking in his bottom lip as he looks down at you. His phone clutched in hand, hovering over your core.

You trust Taehyung with every fiber of your being that he would never let any of these photos meet anyone else’s eyes. He’s your best friend, of course, you trust him.

“Yes,” you consent, wanting nothing more than for him to continue touching you. He gets back to work without another precious second wasted, one hand positions the phone in front of your soaked pussy and the other begins rubbing mind-numbing circles on your clit.

Your hips buck instantly with a wanton moan falling from your lips, “T-Tae- Oh!”

One slender finger enters you without warning, steadily pumping and curling against your tight walls. Your knees bend as your feet struggle to stay planted on the mattress. The camera focused between your thighs have you squirming, he’s catching every second of your writhing and whining.

“Stay still for me, sweetheart, you look so good like this. If the guys saw you…” he groans.

Your eyes snap open. Oh god, the boys, you totally forgot they were here. You clamp your mouth shut, hoping your previous moans weren’t loud enough to arouse suspicion. His finger continues pumping inside of you, and you struggle to keep your moans in. They come out as short whines instead.

Taehyung pouts, noticing the lack of reaction, “Where did those pretty moans go?”

You bite your lip, refusing to let them go and shaking your head. If one of them walks in…

“Come on, moan for me,” he demands, increasing his pace and sliding another finger in. You gasp from the intrusion, but don’t let another moan escape you. He discards the phone onto the bed, leaning over your body, pressing his weight against you. His hand grabs your chin, forcing his thumb into your mouth, prying your lips apart. “Who gives a fuck if the boys are listening. I want to hear you scream.”

“Ah!” Your jaw falls slack as he adds a third finger suddenly, stretching you out. You cry out from absolute pleasure.

He leans back, smirking and satisfied with your cries, “That’s better.” He continues his relentless pace, slamming his fingers into you and hitting the perfect spot with his slender fingers. “You like that, don’t you? You like my fingers filling up your tight pussy.”

“Yes, feels so good,” you moan, back arching off the mattress. He makes you feel on fire with his husky words and sinful touches. You dig your fingers into the cotton white sheets, knuckles turning white as the euphoric feeling in your abdomen begins to build.

As if sensing your orgasm quickly approaching, he edges you on, “Come for me, baby. Let go.”

You clench around his three fingers, bucking your hips to meet his pounding fingers and crying his name as you climax. “Ah, Tae,” you chant his name, pleasure flooding your body.

He slows down his fingers until they still inside you. His lidded gaze travels from your pussy to your heaving chest, and then your blown up pupils. His fingers gently ease out of you and he brings your savory juices to his lips, capturing his fingers in his mouth for a taste.

Your jaw drops as he releases a throaty moan after he pops his fingers back out licked clean.

“Perfect,” he purrs, leaning over to kiss you with of your essence still lingering on his lips. “Fucking perfect. I love you so much.”

You snap your head back as if he’s just hit you. “W-What?”

“I said I love you.” He shrugs off, leaning in for another kiss.

You completely push him off, scrambling to sit up as he huffs and sits back on his calves. “Yeah, you did I heard you the first time. But do you really mean it?”

He looks baffled, shaking his head and pressing you back down to the bed. “Of course I mean it. That’s what I’ve been trying to talk to you about since Saturday, but you kept ignoring me.”

You feel like an idiot. This whole time he’s been trying to tell you how he’s felt and you kept running the other direction, too scared to face the feelings that he has shared all along.

A grin forms on your face, pulling his face closer to you until your noses are nearly touching. “I love you too, Taehyung.”

#bts #bts smut #taehyung smut #btssmutclub #kwritersworldnet #btsguild #bangtanarmynet #bts drabble #bts scenario #bts reaction #taehyung x reader #bts fanfiction #taehyung fanfiction

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wongxiexie · 5 years

Text

False pretenses

Pairing: Kim Jongdae (Chen) x Reader ft. Kim Minseok Genre: Angst, Historical!AU Word Count: 8.372 words Warnings: Death, Violence Note: The photo’s from Chen’s website. I deleted the chapters I uploaded here and decided to stick everything into a finished one shot instead. HAHA Idk why but this fic has caused me great stress because of how unorganized I was and how loose I think everything is hahaha. Tried my best to fix it tho, hope you enjoy! 🌸🌸

A rough hand holds your chin and tilts your face to the side, exposing the blooming dark bruise on your left cheek and causing it to sting.

“Your insolence will be your downfall,” Minseok says as he clicks his tongue, blatantly expressing his disapproval towards your misdemeanor.

“Your Majesty,” you stare at him as you remove his hand lightly, “if you may.”

He releases your face but his sharp eyes stay rooted to yours. “See? Insolent.”

The warm golden light from outside shines through the open window and Minseok turns to soak in it, his face blank as he loops his arms behind him.

To an outsider, the scene might look like a peaceful one but that can’t be further from the truth. The tension is palpable as everyone inside the quarters await for his next words and after what felt like hours, Minseok waves his right arm to dismiss all the servants present.

Soft steps quickly pad towards the doorway as the sock-clad hand-maids rush to flee the room.

“If I may ask,” you start as you move to stand beside him. “Did something unfortunate happen before I moved here?”

You relish the soft touch of the wind on your face and continue, “I have only been here for a few months, but I have noticed how terrified and on edge the people seem to be.”

Glancing at him, you think you see a slight crease form between his brows, but it’s gone before you can dwell on it.

In response, he angles his face to you and lets a smirk fall on his lips. “I think you are missing the point here...”

“You have only been here for a few months, but your impudence is unlike any other I have witnessed before.” He shifts slightly towards you and raises a brow, “it is rather unbecoming, Princess.”

Heat crawls up your neck upon embarrassment from his words and you look down to break eye contact. Subconsciously, your hand goes up to touch the bruise on your face.

It wasn’t an easy task for you to get your bearings in Silla. Having grown from an entirely different kingdom, there were customs and practices you’ve grown habitual to that were not, in any way, acceptable in your new home.

With the recent happenings in Baekje the year prior because of the invasion, you were forced to go to Silla to negotiate and appeal for the monarchy to protect your people. So many were killed when your kingdom was attacked, but you know you had to protect those that were left. That meant setting aside any of your dreams, wants and needs.

For a princess like you, you know your personal desires do not matter. Nothing matters except for the safety of the remaining people of your kingdom. It was your ultimate duty to protect your people, after all, first and foremost.

That meant hours of working to know the practices and culture of your new home, and appealing to the royal family.

Back in your hometown, you were allowed to mingle with the commoners. In fact, those of royal descent were encouraged to do so to be able to foster strong and genuine unity among the residents under your jurisdiction.

That way, it was easier to implement laws and prevent crimes. In your opinion, it was also delightful to live in harmonious relationship with the people, not just for yourself, but for political reasons as well.

With that system in place in Baekje, there were never any successful attempts at overthrowing the royal family because the people were with the heads of the kingdom.

Which was why you were caught off-guard when the King himself rose from his throne and struck your face when you softly suggested asking the residents of Silla about their living conditions under the current monarchy.

The King and his magistrates were all in shock of your apparently preposterous proposal that there came a chorus of audible gasps around the hall as soon as you uttered those words.

Next thing you know, you were down on the ground, with your left cheek throbbing in pain.

You didn’t know how to react to what happened. You couldn’t understand the murmurs around you, and just barely registered your lady in waiting assisting you by the arm and leading you towards the Prince’s chambers.

You’ve only somewhat processed what happened when you arrived in Minseok’s room and he grabbed your chin.

“I sincerely apologize for what I propositioned in the congregation earlier,” you say, looking abashed, “I honestly had no idea that it was frowned upon here in Silla.”

“Well, I am sure by now you understand that we royals do not wish to stain our hands in dealing with commoners,” the Prince comments in obvious fashion.

Your head snap towards his direction, the disbelief apparent on your face as you never knew Silla to be as disconnected to their people as they are showing right now.

“But, Your Highness, they are your people!” comes your abrupt and almost offended response.

The next second, all you can see is Minseok’s palm near your face.

You are too stunned about the sudden movement that you only start breathing again after realizing he didn’t hit you.

“You see, Princess,” Minseok says your title so condescendingly that it makes goosebumps erupt on your skin. The hand that once posed to hit you move to caress your cheek in a false comforting manner instead.

“May I remind you that even if you were of high stature in Baekje, you are nobody here if not for my family’s deal with your remaining kin.”

He grabs your shoulders and briskly turns you to look outside, “You see those people?” he says as he guides you to look at passing citizens. “They know nothing about you except for the fact that you failed to protect your kingdom.”

A shiver runs down your spine at Minseok’s proximity and you can feel his breath on your neck with how he is standing behind you. But more than anything, the harsh reminder of the reality of your failure causes pain to bloom in your chest.

Steeling yourself to not let the Prince see your watery eyes, you try to excuse yourself from his presence.

You open your mouth but fail to produce any sound as images of your people being killed flash through your mind. Tears start to form on your eyes, but you bite your lower lip to prevent any sobs from escaping.

Minseok immediately picks up on the shudder in your breath and turns you gently to face him.

“Do not worry, my future Queen,” he says mockingly as he wipes the few stray tears on your cheeks.

He kisses your forehead and looks at you, “I will make sure you will be happy here.”

You swear you have never seen eyes more blank than Minseok has when he smiles at you.

...

Outside, hiding in the shadows, stands a young man with gentle features bearing witness to the exchange. He balls his hands into fists and descends down the alley away from the palace.

——

The day was a serene one, what with the wind gently rustling the leaves in the landscape that surround you. A vibrant blue hovers over you, littered with enough scattered clouds that allow just the right amount of sunlight to grace your skin.

‘What a pleasant day,’ you note… if not for the boisterous laughter coming from the men standing in the archery range.

If there is one thing you are thankful for the etiquette classes you’ve attended since you can remember, it would be the skill you acquired in schooling your features into a neutral look to prevent unsightly expressions from overtaking your face.

You want to frown so bad at the things happening around you.

Sitting as still as a rock, you keep your blank face pointed straight towards the loud men supposed to be of some of the highest blood lines.

Inside, you’re wondering how those men were treated growing up.

Tinkling giggles snap you out of your momentary stupor and you realize you have just unknowingly spaced out. You turn towards the noblewomen watching and follow their gazes fixated on the practicing men.

Years of strict etiquette classes couldn’t have prevented the frown that immediately settles on your face upon seeing the ruckus on the field.

A servant is down on the floor clutching his stomach. The noblemen are obviously ganging up on the smaller man and you grimace when you see the tallest one, Lord Chanyeol from House Park, land a rather strong kick towards the man’s side.

You whip your head to look at the Prince beside you, awaiting any orders you’re sure he would bark out to stop the servant from getting beaten up, but the air is almost knocked out from your lungs when you see him sitting at ease, an amused smirk dancing on his lips.

Indignation rises from within you and you walk determinedly towards the men.

When you are within earshot, you stop and clear your throat. Keeping your chin up, you look at the three as they stop their assault.

“My lords,” you say with a surprisingly stable voice.

The youngest was the first to turn to you. Lord Sehun from House Oh. How can you forget when his family is easily one of the most powerful and most ruthless in Silla?

He stands up straight and stares you down, his height serving as an intimidation on its own as he lets an inscrutable expression fall on his face. After a few seconds of looking at you, he bows and offers his hand. Placing yours on his, you have to suppress the shiver that goes down your spine the moment his warm lips touch the back of your hand.

As if possible, he towers even more over you as he straightens back up.

“Princess [Y/N],” you look at the voice that addressed you and you try to smile at him -- Lord Jongin, one of the Prince’s closest cousins. You have met him once when you just arrived in Silla. He seemed kind back then, which made you realize first impressions really were often incorrect since you can never erase from your mind the image of him beheading one of his poor servants who tried to steal bread for his famished daughter.

He greets you as Sehun did, and Chanyeol follows after.

The three stand tall in front of you, shoulders squared and backs straight in what is supposed to be a posture of giving proper respect to those of royal blood, but it only serves to remind you of how low they actually think of you behind the formalities they impose when you face them.

The action rather intimidates you, but you have to steel your nerves for the servant on the ground who is already coughing up blood.

“I was watching you,” you clear your throat, “and I couldn’t help but be curious.”

“Pray tell, may you, what did the lowly servant do to warrant the punishment you have just given him?” you almost blanch at the horrible thing that left your mouth, but you know you have to appeal to their good side.

A glimmer of approval seems to appear in the eyes of Chanyeol and Sehun, but Jongin outright smirks at your agreeable countenance.

Chanyeol toes the head of the servant and angles it towards you. “This dimwitted lowlife thought he could waste our time with his slow services.”

“And as if that is not foolish enough, he even stepped on my foot,” Sehun spat.

Your hands involuntarily ball into fists at their shallow reasons and you almost hit Chanyeol’s face if only it doesn’t spell death for you if you actually pushed through. Good thing your hands are hidden under the sleeves of your hanbok.

“I see,” you glance at the beaten man on the floor. “Let’s not waste our energy on a servant. Please continue on with your training, we’ll see to it that he gets what he deserves.”

You wave two of your personal guards over and instruct them to take the servant away. As discreetly as you can, you whisper to the one closest to you to take care of the beaten man.

When the servant is dragged away, you turn towards the noblemen and bid them luck and safety with their archery.

Going back to your place beside Minseok, you lock eyes with him and you almost stop. He is looking at you as if he knows exactly what you did, a cold and calculating glimmer present in his eyes.

“Fraternizing with the royalty, aren’t you?” he follows you with his gaze until you settle on your seat. “Make sure you do not get caught when you do something foolish.”

You breathe deeply to calm your racing heart, but it almost immediately picks up speed with what he says next. “You would not want your people to suffer because of your idiocy, would you?”

He fixes you with another piercing stare and all you can do is look at him and nod.

In a rare burst of confidence, you place your right hand above his left, “I would not do anything against your will, or the will of Silla, my Prince.”

His expression remains unreadable as he intertwines his fingers with yours.

“I have grown quite fond of you, Princess,” Minseok is already looking straight ahead as he speaks. It would be an understatement to say you are surprised by his words, but you know better than to relax around him. You almost want to, but he continues speaking.

“…and I would not want you to find out what happens to those who go behind my back.”

——

That night, you sneak out of your room, disguised as a commoner and wearing your lady-in-waiting’s clothes. You perfectly know you cannot trust anyone in Silla, but if you are to name exceptions, they would be your two personal guards and your personal servant.

Yerim is a young woman assigned to you when you arrived at the palace. She just recently became an adult but already has the sense of responsibility and discipline as that of the older servants. She helps you dress in her clothes and walks with you to the stables where you were informed you could find the man from earlier that day.

A gasp fights its way out of your mouth when you see the state he is in.

Seated on the ground with a mere thin stack of hay acting as a cushion for him, you can see his face bloodied and bruised badly to the point where he seems like he just got out of a fight.

You kneel in front of him and grasp his face gently. Slowly bringing your right hand to his face, it feels like cold water was doused over you when he flinches from your touch.

He thought you were going to hit him…

A grim realization washes over you. You claim to abhor the apathy of the royal family, but in the end, are you any different than them? It has almost been a year since you arrived, but have you done anything for the people there?

All you are thinking about is Baekje, and you feel shame over the harsh reality that you have been turning a blind eye to the struggles of the people of Silla.

You place your hand gently on his cheek, bringing him to face you. It is dark inside the stables with only a few torches lit, but you can see with the faint light that his eyes still hold traces of tears.

“I am so sorry for what they did to you,” you say in a quiet, ashamed voice.

The man raises his eyes to meet yours, albeit shyly and a little scared.

“There is nothing for you to apologize about, My Lady,” he speaks in an equally hushed tone.

You bring your gaze down, not being able to look at him anymore because of how you failed to protect someone yet again, but still, you try to face him.

“May I know your name?”

Mild shock paints his features at your request, but he answers nonetheless. “Chen, Your Majesty. My name is Chen.”

You will yourself to smile, conveying at least a bit of comfort for his pain-riddled body as you bring out the small bag of coins you took with you to give to him.

“Please use this to buy supplies so you can have your bruises and wounds properly treated.” He seems to want to give it back but you enclose his hand with both of yours and push it gently towards him.

“I am sorry if this is all the help I can give for now,” you apologize earnestly. “But I swear I will take care of the people of Silla. I will help all those who need help.”

You gaze at him but this time, he diverts his eyes from you and stays quiet, not at all saying anything back. With his quietness, you guess you have overstayed your welcome so you stand up to leave.

As you are about to exit the stables, you hear him speak faintly. “Thank you,” he says so quietly, you almost don’t hear him.

You turn around and let out a tender smile. “You’re always welcome,” you say truthfully.

——

The coldness of the night makes its presence known, sending goosebumps to erupt on your arms and legs even with the thick clothing wrapped around your body.

Black paints the night sky and is littered with a few stars here and there, twinkling as if the light they have can’t be contained just within their vessels. As if there was so much light in them that they have to share it with the world.

That thought puts a small smile on your face.

Glancing upwards, you gaze at the stars in the sky and you thank whatever gods are alive that at least someone or something, from somewhere in the world still want to share their light with you.

The smile falls fast from your lips, however, and your eyes divert from above towards the lands in full view from your place atop one of the upper floors of the castle.

Standing on the balcony connected to your chambers, you admire the few people going about and preparing for the night. There isn’t much to see, honestly, since the citizens of the capital tend to keep to themselves, as you have noticed.

Most of the nobles do not like you anyway, so you guess there aren’t any problems not seeing them more often. Well, the people don’t like you, noble or not.

Longing and frustration can only begin to describe what you have been feeling as of late.

Your heart yearns to be back in Baekje where your friends and family are, where your people are. You perfectly understand why you have to be in Silla and of course, you aren’t going to just up and leave to run back to those who care about you.

But you just can’t fight the loneliness you always feel.

In all your time in your new home, you have seen nothing but cruelty and felt nothing but negative emotions. You always have to be strong in front of the others so the wolves they call nobles won’t tear you to pieces.

It feels like everyone is just waiting for you to snap and give up, to be the downfall of your own kingdom. You feel like they’re predators just waiting for you, the weak little prey, to make the mistake of getting out of your protective shell and into their domain.

The pressure is always so intense and ever-present, especially when you’re with the Crown Prince. You will be wed to him, tied to him for the rest of your life, all for the protection that Silla can provide for your people. You need to marry him and your feelings do not at all matter, especially in the grand scheme of things.

You know that… but sometimes he can be so, so cruel.

Members of Minseok’s royal guard discovered spies disguised as servants and they didn’t hesitate to make them known to the public. They chained them to poles on the capital grounds and burned them to death.

You sat beside the Crown Prince throughout the whole ordeal and while you couldn’t even get yourself to spare a glance at the suspects out of sheer horror of what’s happening, you found that the situation wasn’t the same with him. The smile that he wore was so cold, so unaffected and so self-assured.

He was amused by the spectacle in front of him.

Later that day, you accompanied the prince to honor Lord Chanyeol and Lord Sehun, the highest-ranking elite nobles from the royal guard. They discovered the spies and proposed the punishment they thought fit for those who committed treason.

You weren’t keen on seeing them again after you’ve just witnessed them terrorize an innocent servant a couple of weeks back, but there you were beside Minseok, fake-smiling and bestowing honor to them for successfully protecting the kingdom from perpetrators.

The enthusiasm was proper, and you agreed. After all, the kingdom was saved from what could have possibly been a catastrophic event. However, you didn’t concur with the way they treated the men. They were the enemy, but that did not mean that they should die a horrible death. However, it seemed like the people of the kingdom were all too happy to assert their dominance over their enemies.

Especially the Prince.

The same one you were supposed to entrust your life to.

A choked sob makes its way up your throat and you don’t even try to fight it.

Nobody will hear you because you are alone anyway, always have been since you moved to Silla. Usually, your lady-in-waiting is there with you, but you sent her free for the night. Even though it is her duty to attend to you, deep inside you feel that she wouldn’t want to if she was given the option.

You heave a deep sigh and walk towards the hallway, wanting to get out and take a walk. Sliding the door open as you wipe your tears, you are surprised to find an equally startled man standing outside your chambers, eyes wide and mouth a bit open.

He quickly falls to his knees and pushes his head to the ground in a low bow. In your shock, you bend down and grasp his arms to pull him up from his kneeling position.

“Chen?” you call his name when you get a good look at his face, recognizing the servant you helped a few weeks ago.

“Princess…” he says in a quiet, unsure voice. He looks visibly flustered because of the proximity so you quickly let go of your hold on him.

Clearing your throat, you begin to ask him. “What are you doing here?”

He hesitates for a moment and averts his eyes from you before meeting your stare again with his own meek one. “I was passing through the corridors for my final duties of the night…”

“I heard somebody crying and looked for the source. I wanted to see if I could be of some help.”

Your heart skips a beat and a tear runs down your cheek.

Is this how deprived you are of kindness? That one act like that almost sends you bawling with relief in the discovery that there is, in fact, at least one kind person in Silla?

All rational thoughts escape your mind and you hold his cheeks with your palms. In an instant, your lips are on his, your eyes closed while his are wide open.

Just as fast as you held him, you immediately release him upon the realization of what you’ve done.

Air escapes your lungs when you fall on the floor in your haste to back away from him and your shocked and pained expression is enough to spur Chen to set aside his own surprise in favor of helping you stand from the floor instead.

Reason seems to have found its way back to your head and you frantically look at both ends of the corridor to see if anyone saw what just transpired.

Suddenly, Chen bows straight in front of you as he almost shouts out an apology.

“Forgive me, my Lady!” you’re stunned by him, his voice shaking and he looks as frightened as a hare corned by wolves.

“What… why…” guilt starts to eat at you from the inside. “Don’t… why are you the one apologizing?” You ask him in a shaky voice.

He stands up from his bow and is surprised to see you looking at him like he just did something wrong.

“Why are you apologizing when clearly I’m the one who just– just attacked you like that out of nowhere?” It is clear that you are getting frantic, guilt and anger brewing an unpleasant mix from within you.

“Had anyone witnessed what I did, you would be sentenced to death, no questions asked!”

Chen’s panic is rising with every word that comes out of your mouth and he whips his head around to see if anyone is passing by.

“Or maybe…” you look at your shaking hands, your breath shallow. The next words that come out of your mouth are said so quietly, it almost looks like the words are for you, and only you.

“Maybe you should tell the Prince that I forced you so he could gladly sentence me to death… after all I deserve such punishment for putting your life on the line--”

The arms that immediately engulf you are warm and you belatedly realize that Chen is already holding you close to his chest. You can’t fight it anymore, the pent up emotions all come rushing out like water from a broken dam.

The anger, the loneliness, the frustration, the sadness.

Everything just breaks free from you the moment you start crying.

It doesn’t even occur to you that you’re already sobbing until you hear Chen whisper words of comfort in your ears, telling you that it’s difficult but it’s all going to be okay and that he understands... That he understands very well.

When your crying has subsided, Chen leads you inside your room again and guides you to lie down. Grabbing the quilt, he drapes it over you until up to your chest, wishing you a peaceful sleep for the night.

He stands up, prepared to leave your chambers, but you grab his hand to stop him.

“Please,” you whimper. “Please don’t leave me alone.”

He looks at your face for a few seconds, causing you to almost take back what you said. You are about to apologize when Chen lifts the quilt and lays beside you.

There’s a significant space between the two of you but you’re just glad he’s there to be with you. Even with the distance between your bodies, it’s the first time in a long time that you feel you’re not alone and just that is enough reason for you to be deeply grateful.

“Thank you,” you say with a low voice. Laying there side by side, sleep almost claims you fast with how much you’ve cried that night alone. You’re so tired of crying, so tired of feeling helpless and even more of being powerless to stop it.

With your eyes closed and your consciousness already dripping by the edge, rest is being yearned by your body and you almost succumb to the lull of darkness but not before you feel him hold your hand.

Just before you fall asleep, you hear Chen whisper.

“I understand.”

——

At first you thought the days that would follow the incident would be miserable, but now sitting beside Chen, hands intertwined and with only the moon and the stars as your witnesses, you couldn’t be happier.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you think what you’re doing is dangerous, and you know it is, but the experience of comfort and companionship veils you from the real risks at hand.

The feeling of Chen rubbing soothing circles on your hand brings you out of the momentary daze you are in. Turning towards him, you meet his stare, loving how his gentle features bring you ease no matter the circumstances.

In your calmness, you fail to notice the slight crease between his eyebrows.

——

Darkness covers the skies, preventing any semblance of light from shining through as if the heavy clouds in your heart aren’t enough on its own.

Struggling to keep your panic inside, you breathe slowly as you try your best to ignore the way the Crown Prince’s hand on yours seems to burn your skin. Your hand shakes a little and it does not go unnoticed by him judging by how he spares a quick side glance your way.

The gathering seems to go on longer, each passing moment increasing the dread you are feeling. You do not pay attention to the people speaking, choosing to ignore for as long as you can the reality they are bringing to life with their words.

Despite the widespread dislike for you, the important people in the hall cannot contain their eagerness for the wedding, excited for once about the prospect of formally accepting you into the kingdom because it would mean Silla’s official subjugation of Baekje.

After some time, the nobles and the royals file out of the throne room, leaving only you and Minseok alone.

He turns towards you and takes you in his cold embrace, pulling your body impossibly snug against his.

“I cannot wait for tomorrow,” he says lowly in your ear. “The ceremony, and especially for what happens after… how I can finally claim you as mine.”

The Prince shifts his hold to your waist and moves so he can look directly into your eyes. “Tomorrow, I can have your all at last. Mind…” he leans closer as his hands travel higher.

“Body.” A kiss on the edge of your lips.

“Soul.”

He finishes as he plants a full kiss on your lips.

You tense upon the contact but Minseok doesn’t seem to care. He slowly pulls away and you almost recoil when you see nothing but amusement and anticipation dancing in his eyes. Licking his bottom lip, he lets you go and orders your lady in waiting to take you back to your private quarters.

With a bowed head, Yerim rushes to you and you all but run from the hall once Minseok dismisses you.

You can’t think straight so you let your feet take you to wherever, the young servant right on your heels worriedly urging you to go back to where the Prince ordered you to.

“Your Highness, we should go back,” Yerim says pleadingly but almost admonishingly, no doubt scared of the consequences, but you don’t listen to her. Turning towards another corridor, you’re surprised to find yourself face to face with Chen, his brows furrowed in concern upon seeing you in tears-- tears you don’t even notice.

“[Y/N],” he rushes towards you and he wipes the tears on your cheeks with his thumbs. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

A gasp sounds from behind you and when you turn around, you meet Yerim’s shocked face. She just saw Chen holding you with familiarity and speaking your name as if he is of same standing.

His eyes widen as he registers the presence of another person, not at all prepared for such an encounter.

Your servant hurries away and Chen turns to run after her, but you stop him with a hand on his arm. He looks at you and decides that your well-being is more important at the moment.

Taking your hand in his, he guides you along the corridors to your room, preferring to console you in private and away from prying eyes.

The moment the doors slide close, you loop your arms around his torso and sob on his chest.

It was unfair.

Why is the world just so unfair?

The past few weeks you spent with Chen have been the best you’ve had since you moved to the new kingdom. You were so caught up in the safety net that is him that you almost forgot the reason why you were in Silla in the first place. So good were you in pushing your worries to the back of your mind that you did start to forget your true purpose.

With only a day away from your marriage to the Crown Prince, all your worries rush back to your mind, overwhelming you and drowning you in their torrential waves.

Along with the reality that you will be tied to Minseok starting the next day, you cry harder upon the realization that you will have to stop meeting with Chen after the ceremony. Not only will it be dangerous not just for him, but for you as well, but it will also be unfair for Chen.

He is nothing but a kind soul and you know you can never be unfair to him.

You will not do that, no, and he doesn’t deserve to be treated like that. With all the courage you can muster, you detach yourself from his hold, still tearful and sniffling.

“Chen…” you look into his eyes, certain that it might be the last time you can openly do so.

He calls your name in a quiet voice and you can do nothing but let your body do what it yearns to do.

Your lips are on his before you can register it and your hands raise to caress his soft cheeks. He holds your jaw with one hand while the other finds purchase on your waist. All you can do is feel Chen and relish the time you can spend with him like this.

It doesn’t matter if you want him. Your choices never matter after all, but this time, you really feel the hurt from not having your emotions be put into consideration.

Even if you don’t want to, you know you will have to stop seeking comfort from the one and only person you consider your home away from your real home. You will have to part, and never will you be able to hold him like this again.

For reasons you cannot fully accept, you resign yourself to your fate and let yourself cry harder.

Chen feels your body shake from your sobs and he tries his best to convey comfort through the arms that hold you tight. You both know there’s no going around the destiny that awaits you so he simply guides you to lie down on your bed, engulfs you in his warm embrace and lets you cry your heart out.

——

You wake up with a start, disoriented and with eyes still heavy from crying as well as your abrupt awakening.

However, sleep is instantly wiped from you when you see Chen hovering over you, a knife in his hand, poised and ready to be brought down on you.

The moment you lock eyes with him, his own widen and his hand starts to shake.

An interruption from your door startles the both of you and you turn to see the Crown Prince himself entering the room, a cold and almost blank look on his face but a small satisfied smirk on his lips.

Baekhyun and Kyungsoo, your personal guards, immediately enter the room and tackle Chen, holding him flat on the ground. His struggling does nothing to deter the two men holding him down, taking the knife from him and throwing it somewhere unreachable.

Before you can fully register what’s happening, Minseok speaks.

“This went on even better than I expected,” he says as he looks at Chen. “Back then, I knew I recognized you from somewhere and I wasn’t wrong.”

Glancing around the room, you still don’t know what is happening and it causes the frustration to seep from you. The Prince diverts his attention to you and your heart stops at the sight of his disapproving but all too amused stare.

“I thought I had warned you well not to let me find out about your foolishness, Princess,” he sees the confusion on your face and lets his smirk widen. As if on cue, Yerim emerges from behind him, wearing an expression you can only describe as a look of satisfaction.

You don’t understand!

You thought Yerim was on your side-- that she would at least be willing to give you a chance to explain what she saw earlier but it seems you’re wrong and now it’s too late.

“--what… --I do not..,” you try to speak but find that you can’t form your thoughts into sentences. You move your gaze back and forth from Minseok to Chen, fear gripping your heart from what grim consequences are sure to await you and him upon being discovered by Minseok, but the Prince seems to know more than he lets on.

“Oh,” he chuckles as he raises a brow. “The Princess is worried about you, Kim Jongdae. Do you mean to tell me she does not know of your true identity?”

You frown at the unfamiliar name and snap your head towards Chen, seeing a semblance of guilt fall on his face. He averts his gaze from you and looks at Minseok instead, his lips curl into a snarl, daring the Prince to continue speaking.

Minseok isn’t deterred one bit. He bellows out a loud, harsh laugh and sweeps his hands in a grand gesture. “Imagine, you try to kill the next Queen of this kingdom and she does not even know who you are and what you were planning to do to her all along.”

Not caring about formalities, you grasp for clarity. “Chen!” you shout desperately. “What is he saying!”

The Prince walks towards you and pulls you up with a tight grip on your arm, making you cry out in pain. He brings you closer to him, holding your back flat against his chest with an arm around your waist while his other hand goes to hold your chin to force you to look at Chen… --at Jongdae.

“You see, Princess, Jongdae wanted to kill you,” he says, mirth obvious in his voice. “But you know I will not let that happen.”

“But do not tell me there is no recognition in you at all when you look at his face?” he mocks. “No recollection of any Kim Jongdae? Perhaps from your younger years?”

“Or maybe you do not know him… but you know of someone, a rather beautiful woman if I may say so, who for some reason is related to this scum who tried to end your life?”

You flinch at the reminder, not at all ready to wrap your head around the truth of Jongdae’s attempt on your life, but as you blink and stare at the man before you…

A sharp inhale is all you can muster at the moment. “That’s… that’s why you looked familiar… because I have seen you before,” you say, your voice barely a whisper. “--you’re Taeyeon’s younger brother…”

Jongdae lunges forward at the mention of his sister’s name. “You do no’t get to talk about her as if you ever cared about her!” he shouts, voice riddled with pure unadulterated anger and pain. He almost successfully breaks free from the guards’ hold on him but they pull him back, hitting his body and forcing him to kneel in front of you and the Prince.

Minseok releases his hold on you and pushes you forward, causing you to fall on directly in front of Jongdae. “Go on, tell her the truth, you mongrel.”

“Chen… Jongdae,” gulping, you lift your head to look at him. “Please look at me.” You raise your hand to his cheek, willing him to tell you the truth but he avoids your touch altogether. He looks off to the side, choosing to fume silently in anger.

“Oh, you do not wish to speak?” the Prince says with a chuckle. “Let me do the honor then.”

He walks closer to Jongdae and lands a firm kick on his stomach, causing him to double over in pain.

“No! Stop!” you scramble to stop the Prince but he hits your face with the back of his hand, causing you to fall back curled on a heap on the floor.

“You do not know the truth yet, so stop trying to protect him, you fool,” Minseok says in a growl. “He wanted to end your life so he can prevent me from getting what I wanted - which is to rule over your kingdom. With you gone, Baekje can easily back off from their plea,” he clicks his tongue.

“No problem there but I would rather save the resources we will need to mobilize if we try to take your kingdom by force,” he looks at you then, reading the confusion clear on your face. “But why does he abhor me, you ask? Well, because I killed the pathetic little spy he calls his precious sister.”

Jongdae struggles again, wanting nothing more than to strangle the Prince with his bare hands, but the guards hold him down.

“So you did not care about me the whole time…?” you try to say, your breath seemingly getting more shallow the longer you stay in the room.

Minseok picks up the discarded knife and presses the pointed tip on Jongdae’s neck. “Tell her, servant,” he urges, drawing a little amount of blood from Jongdae. “Tell her you do not care, even now. Tell her that the only intent you had when you showed her kindness was to create a ploy to take something important from me - to take revenge on me the only way you know how because you know you will never get the opportunity to kill me.”

“Well, you failed. Miserably. Just like your incompetent sibling.”

You sit helpless on the floor, eyes locked with Jongdae’s and you almost cry from the emotions that flit on his beautiful face.

Anger. Resentment. Betrayal.

But among them, you also see something else.

Worry. Guilt.

Regret.

Remorse.

... Love.

Memories from years back flood your mind and you remember personally selecting Taeyeon to be part of the emissaries to be sent to Silla for a special mission.

She was one of your personal guards, one of the best in the whole army, and you proudly endorsed her for it, not knowing that the task entailed spying on Silla.

After some time, you got word of her unexpected and unfortunate death, but you didn’t know it was because of the mission.

The first tear drop falls from your eyes… followed by another, and another. And you find your vision blurring from the onslaught of tears.

Jongdae’s breathing is also picking up, unfiltered negative feelings about his sister’s demise taking over his entire person. He doesn’t even attempt to stop it and just lets them cascade down his cheeks.

“Please don’t-- just…-- don’t pretend to care about her when you were the one who sent her to her death,” he chokes out, voice thick with sorrow.

You shake your head vehemently, “You don’t understand-- Jongdae, I did not know,” you sob. “I did not… if I knew then I would not have-- no…” you cover your face with your hands, desperate to get rid of the guilt and the blame for something you did not know. “She was my friend.”

“This brings me such great amusement,” Minseok laughs in glee. “Now that we have those misunderstandings out of the way, I want you fools to reflect on what happened so you can both feel more miserable. I should end your lives for treason and infidelity, no?”

He draws his own sword and points it at you. “Should I kill you first, Princess?”

Jongdae surprises everyone in the room with how he breaks free from the guards and tackles Minseok to the ground. He lands a solid blow to the Prince’s jaw before the panicked men drag him away, beating him up to make him stop.

“Do not lay your hands on her!” he growls out while struggling. “I will kill you if you so much as touch her!”

You stay still in shock and you feel yourself tense even more when Minseok lets out a full-blown laugh. “You dare threaten to kill me if I endanger her life when moments ago, she would have died by your own hands had I not interrupted?”

Jongdae lets shame wash over his face, draining the fight from him and preventing him from so much as glancing at you.

The Prince stands up from his place on the floor, laughing and clutching his stomach for reasons incomprehensible to you and Jongdae. “Will you look at that?” he says in between bouts of laughter.

Shaking his head, he straightens his posture and picks up his discarded sword. To your shock, he sheathes it back and looks at you. “So he does feel even a little for you even though you are foremost the reason why his beloved sibling is dead.”

“I will not kill you. Instead, I will make your lives miserable.” With the smirk still on his face, he walks towards the door, stopping just before he fully exits.

“And I will see to it that you see each other suffer throughout that misery, left wondering each passing day how much hurt you caused one another.”

——

Baekje was always pleasant.

Sure, it wasn’t perfect, but it was your home - a true home. It was one where you had a personal servant whom you treated like a sibling, and who treated you the same way.

You guess Yerim’s loyalty was never yours to claim in the first place.

Back where you came from, you grew up with with your people including the royal guards, the maids, the citizens. You knew just about everyone, but more so your personal guards Junmyeon and Yixing. You know they’d protect you and anyone you loved from any harm that came your way, and not even because of their sworn duty, but more from how they sincerely care about your wellbeing.

You guess it was foolish of you to mistake Kyungsoo and Baekhyun’s kindness to mean they will come to your aid no matter the circumstance. After all, who are you compared the the Prince -- the future King of their own kingdom.

As wishful as it is, you used to think you will be wed to the love of your life - someone you haven’t met back then yet, but who your father and mother assured you that you will get to marry. It was peaceful back then, so peaceful that the royal heads of the kingdom did not see the need to send you to marry a man you did not even know.

You guess you should not question the Prince’s intentions, for after all, isn’t it him who is granting you a wish when he agreed to marry you? Isn’t it him who will provide the safety you so prayed for your kingdom? Does his cruelty really matter? Should you not be thankful?

As much you loved your own kingdom, you had to leave it, for it was that exact love that pushed you to get the help your people needed. It was not an easy task, not in any way, but you thank the gods for blessing you with a person who serves as a beacon of light in a place filled with nothing but darkness. A person who serves as your warmth where there only was coldness. A home away from home, and a home you are eternally grateful for.

You guess you should have questioned it, but when you think deeply about what happened, you believe in the depths of your heart that you got to meet the real Chen -- the real Kim Jongdae. That despite him having a plan against you, you know he understands your plight. You know he did things out of love for his sister. You know that despite claiming to have just pretended to gain your trust, in the end, Kim Jongdae started caring for you… started loving you.

You saw it in the way he wasn’t able to bring the knife down.

You saw it in the way he protected you even in the face of a ruthless prince who can easily end both of your lives.

You saw it in the way he cared for you -- still cares for you.

And now, you see it in the way he looks into your eyes.

As you enter the hall to meet the Crown Prince, you steel yourself and your heart, finally accepting with grim resignation the fate that you tried so hard to evade.

Never will you trust anyone in the kingdom ever again.

Never will you put your faith on any of the people.

Never will you disobey the Prince lest you compromise the safety of your people.

And perhaps most important of all…

Never will you put Kim Jongdae’s life in danger ever again.

How will you be able to suppress your conflicting feelings for him when the Prince had so mercilessly ordered Jongdae to personally attend to you for the rest of your life?

To be forced to spend every waking moment with you when you had both been crushed by the unfortunate circumstances you’ve been tangled in?

What you had was truth founded on lies. You had come to love him and you know he had come to love you too, only to meet a destiny more painful than rejection. And as you engrave into your heart all of these promises you made, you wonder, how will your broken and crushed heart be able to handle Jongdae being by your side in the coming days?

Maybe-- maybe in another life, you can meet each other again.

And maybe in another life you can love without the pain, the anger and the sorrow that fill your current ill-fated lives.

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