#noooooo gonna kms

[robotpussy]

im literally so fucking sad rn I wanted to go to the pub yesterday but I just HAD TO FUCKING PASS OUT IN THE BATHROOM 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

#IM LITERALLY NEVER GONNA SEE THESE PPL AGAIN 😭😭😭😭 NOOOOOO #and its so awkward asking ppl to hang out cause it seems like nobody in class wants to hang out with me #😞😞😞😞😞😞😞😞 like i want kms I WANTED TO GO

[xiaophobic]

OMFG ATLAS?!?!? heellloo! can’t believe i find out ur back from you liking a hsr post i rb’d but wowowowo hi! 🫶

how are you doing? has your hsr experience been good? how have your pulls been? any charas you’re saving for?

srry for all the questions but i’m excited to see you back!

LEE RAHHHHHHHHHH 🦅🦅🦅

oh my god my hsr experience has been fucking ridiculous number one i was COERCED into damning myself to yet another gaming hell (i installed the app entirely on my own free will and only needed the slightest of convincing), I DIDNT FUCKING GET JING YUAN, but it’s okay because i want luocha 😍 that’s wifey right there

#DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR ASKING ME QUESTIONS also i expect you to tell me stuff about your hsr experience as well 🎤 #i was worried because there was this one time on this fucking app where ves was talking about a honkai man #and i was like mmmm i wont him #and then everyone was like NOOOOOO HES EVIL AND INWAS LIKE AHHHHHHH #and luocha kind of looks like that man #AND I DONT WANT MY BABYGIRL TO BE EVIL (i know nothing about luocha yet i haven’t even entered whatever planet he’s from) #will be heartbroken if he plays me 😣 ALSO IM PROBS GONNA SKIP KAFKA WHICH MAKES ME WANNA KMS #atlas.asks #atlas.moots

[xwildwhirlx]

when you see really good art that you want to reblog but it contains something that triggers you so you can’t

#suicide joke tw #whirl speaks #Like I’ll see an absolute MASTERPIECE #but then it has specific elements that I find triggering #And it’s like “noooooo 😭” #anyways this is /lh so dw I’m not gonna kms bc I can’t reblog art lol

[krispiecake]

who knew not killing yourself was this fucking difficult

#suicide tw #self harm tw #sh tw #im sooooo tempted to slit my wrists rn omg #i hate bpd i thought i was stabilising but noooooo #now every time anything happens im tryna kms #not even in a funny ha ha way in a i end up in hospital way #was gonna od tonight but the shops are shut cuz its sunday so i cant get any pills #so i sh’d and not to be insane but i got close ish to one of the viens in my wrist and im soooo tempted my god #i cant stand this shit i cant stand life i cant stand college i cant stand anything anymore #i have no tolerance to anything #and everything thats meant to help isnt fucking helping #and i feel so antsy again #waiting for handover to be finished so i can supervised by staff lol

[cynical-canidae]

I actually love "Twice Upon A Time" because the whole situation is so funny. The Doctor is like nah. Lost my gf (can't remember). Lost my wife. Lost my spunky lesbian best friend. Over this shit!! I'm gonna kms this time FOR REAL!! And he meets his younger self and he's like wtf. 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️ You can't kys because how the fuck am I gonna end it all if I don't even exist???? And the consciousness of his dead best friend is like noooooo Doctor you can't kys your swag too kind. Your bitch too good. The universe NEEDS you, autism creature!!!! 🥺🥺 And he's like Fuck. I guess I'll (not) die. New bottom surgery unlocked!!: LIGHTING MYSELF ON FIRE AND EXPLODING. (Successful!! 😘😘)

#kris shut up #doctor who #twice upon a time #twelfth doctor #the doctor #bill potts #thirteenth doctor #i guess #i laugh at this all the time #i need to be put down #12th doctor

[oceanmoss]

noooooo i lost my almost 2 year streak on duolingo i'm gonna kms frrrrrrr

#🧷

[stars-and-birds]

guess who just finished harrow the ninth (i’m gonna kms)

AHHHHHHDHSJNSJSHGWJSJHEBSUHSBE

anyway here are my chronological thoughts from earlier

god. rereading parts of the book, you can see she almost never says ortus/gideon’s name aloud. jesus. tasmyn muir u are insane

i have no caption i just love gideon 

hot 

THEM. god.

all these characters are so fun to read about. i’m glad we got to see more of abigail this book 

PRO NOOOO

something about harrow having no one growing up but then have all these people willing to risk their lives again to exorcise a ghost from her body is just. goddamn. 

OH GOD MAGNUS

one thing about gideon nav is she will be injured and in a foreign body and alone on a god’s spaceship-house and still keep a kill count 

something something love triangle 

oh this is so juicy 

SHE KEPT THE SUNGLASSES. (not to sound like a broken record but. god.)

oh. ow

i am going to cry on this fucking train 

absolutely amazing how this book can make me go from internally sobbing to cackling 

oh shit. ortus. no don’t die dude. (he was growing on me. and he means so much to harrow)

quick break to say that i noticed anastasia’s cav was named samael novenary, and wasn’t that the name of the chain or whatever that harrow nova had?

oh???? who is this????

MATTHIAS NONUIS????

okay not to bring up toh but the sleeper saying “i killed wizard’s filth like you all my life” is giving philip wittebane idk (also makes me think that the sleeper is maybe someone from before the ressurection?)

god, the way harrow thinks of gideon even when she’s not there, how she’d act, what she’d say…

LMFAO great callback

i think i forgot to post this but btw when corona came back i grinned so hard i missed her sm

oh no. noooooo. 

abigail saying she feels responsible for harrow is sO—

god this is all too much i’m gonna cry 

commander wake— who’s that again? the dude from the blood of eden? or someone else?

what the FUCK is going on?? mercy was working for wake??? huh????

gideons mom is WAKE?! (not confirmed yet but. that’s what i’m getting. right? bc it was nineteen years ago??)

“the woman i was pretty sure was actually my mother—wearing the body of a woman i’d had a crush on, who in turn had been wearing the identity of a woman she’d murdered, until i fell on a spike so that my boss could kill her—craned her head around in her bonds” well. that’s one hell of a sentence.

oh my god. oh my god.

ALECTO?????????

OH ALECTO IS HARROWS FREEZER MEAT GIRLFRIEND 

wait is she???? i’m confused 

oh. god is dead. holy fuck

oh. god is no longer dead. what the fuck 

how the hell do you even pronounce pyrrah dve

does gideon have three fathers (god gideon the prequel and pyrrah dve fucking apparently)

IS IANTHE DEAD

IS GIDEON DEAD

IS HARROW DEAD?!???

okay okay whoever that is in the epilogue (who i’m guessing is nona) is being cared for by judith corona and cam right??

WHY DOES IT ONLY SAY GIDEON WILL RETURN HARROWS NOT DEAD RIGHT

SHHHHEJSBAKMS

#esme reads #the locked tomb

[andvys]

I CANT AFFORD THE NEW TAYLOR CARDIGAN IM GONNA KMS 😖😖😖😖😖😖😫

NOOOOOO (same)

#andy’s asks

[mangoposts]

i just got my period and im in pain. i also bleed through on my sheets that are WHITE. god im gonna kms

NOOOOOO im sending you some new sheets and a heating pad

Whenever i get cramps literally nothing fixes it i literally think about killing myseld every time

#🥭

[mars-wants-candy]

NOOOOOO MATPAT FOUND WELCOME HOME. IM GONNA KMS

#welcome home #welcome home arg

[turnips-creates]

15 Questions!!! (or in this case -> 25)

Thankie to both @carrotblr , @legiomiam , and @awritingcaitlinfor the tags!

I'm doing this all in one go bc if I don't, I'm gonna completely forget

Carrot's 15 ->

Are you named after anyone? yep! my middle name references my great gran

When was the last time you cried? hahahahaaaAAAAAAAA

Do you have kids? depends? none of my own genetics, but more OCs than i can list… plus a couple of pseudo-adopted kiddos i became con-parent to

Do you use sarcasm a lot? Noooooo, never in my life have i ever  🥰

What’s the first thing you notice about people? vibes or hair color

What’s your eye color? 👓

Scary movies or happy endings? i really don’t do well with suspense, sooooo typical horror ain’t my strong suit??? lets just say my friends don’t take me to those anymore, but if we’re talking just my preference in endings, i’m only care if it was a satisfying conclusion that goes with the storyline. [by satisfying i mean did the story go through a full arc]

Any special talents? i’ve been told i do??? a current list includes but apparently isn’t limited to: archery, socializing [apparently???], having a random assortment of facts on any given hyperfixation i’ve had, tripping over royalty, and reading really fast while being slow as shit at typing

Where were you born? hell, not quite sure which lvl tho… 4 maybe?

What are your hobbies? what do i not have as a hobby? rn it’s renaissance recreation that is NOT ren faire and embroidery/textiles 

Have you any pets? 3 cats, 1 doggo, and a fish

What sports do you play/have played? swimming, volleyball, and period archery are/were the ones i compete(d) in, but i also did boffer fighting as a kid

How tall are you? high end of average??? i grew really fast at a young age tho, so i towered over my elementary/middle school classmates. kept getting mistaken for an adult at 12 y/o

Favorite subject in school? SCIENCE

Dream job? i also would love to be a bestselling author, but becoming a novel editor would be fun too. the one i’m currently thinking of switching my major to - as i’m currently in the english dep with a focus in creative writing - is psychiatric neurology??? it’s always been fascinating to me especially after my way late audhd diagnosis

Legiom & Caitlyn's 10 ->

1. Do you prefer owls, capybaras, or flamingos?

OWLS! SKY CATS! i totally didn’t have a hyperfixation on ornithology with a focus in raptors as a kid… did you know an owl’s feathers are different from a hawks? the hawk’s wing feathers have ‘hooks’ that hold their feathers together? most birds have that feature in their feathers - it’s why the strands of individual flight feathers can be hard to break up, but owls don’t have such strong ones! owls also have small structures fluffing up from their flight feathers, and both of these features breaks up the air currents around their wings, not only allowing for near silent flight but also incredibly slow speeds - barn owls can glide as slow as 2 miles or 3.22 km per hour! there are variations of course —

2. What is your favorite soup?

uuuuhhh, does stew count as a soup??? if so, then there was this really great guinness based lamb stew i had in a small hole in the wall in ireland during my semester there

3. What is your favorite…rock (idfk)?

carnelian? or jade? the real pale kind?

4. Choose a familiar:

- very dumb, very loving disobedient dog. He loves you but will never listen to you ever

- a raven that speaks but it only ever shrieks the name of various fast food restaurants

- a toad that screams like a teenage boy instead of croaks

BIRB

5. Which planet do you feel like would be kind of an asshole if you met them?

Jupiter. definitely. 

[i totally wasn’t going to make a uranus joke, nope, not meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee]

6. if you were a worm would you love me? (ah yes me I did this)

depends on what kind of worm you became and whether or not i know it’s you

7. Least favorite type of clothing?

itchy ones.

8. You are now in a horror movie—so sorry. Chance of survival?

50/50 cause i’m an absolute dumbass. i’d either die immediately or out-dumb the villain.

9. Would you rather: the ability to instantly grow a perfect mustache, or ability to talk to vegetables?

mustache. a) it’s prime comedy and disguise material and b) i could not eat any veggies if i could hear them.

10. What do you think of whales?

THE BABIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

Feel free to answer any combination of the above questions! Sorry, if you've already been tagged:

@clockworkgalaxies @faelanvance @saltwaterbells @saphoblin @moonscribbler

Have fun!!!

#tag games #not writing #15 questions #well #more like 25

[catholicjinx]

youd think that cracking my ankles and taking tylenol and a hot bath would help my pain but NOOOOOO i have to suffer until tomorrow morning when its gonna be dull and barely there. kms

#giving my chronic pain away who wants it

[gvmdisease]

anyone ik irl dni

knowing my parents care more about my mental health than my physical sucks bc no matter what they’re gonna constantly push me to try and be as able bodied as possible i won’t be getting a cane anytime soon i won’t be get a rolator or more braces and splints bc in their eyes it’s growing pains that im over reacting too even after countless arguments and breakdowns they don’t care i remember after my first physical therapy appointment which was like two or so days after an argument that ended with me sobbing my eyes out and relapsing my mom said “i don’t ever want you to be in so much pain you’re crying like that ever again” but when i try to do things or get things to help so i don’t get to points like that she’s like “mm….no you’re actually not disabled enough even with a diagnosis i belive that is false you’re just fine” like that arugument and breakdown wasn’t about the pain it’s self but being beloved bc no one fucking believes how much pain i’m really in and shit like i fucking hate it i could be in such a better place if my parents just believed me and let me get the things that would fucking help me but noooo i’m fucking fine and not disabled but yk getting therapy for depression and shit it greattt and i just need to do that forever even though it makes me wanna kms even more and being disabled constantly makes me want to attempt has had be on the edge of an attempt and has made me relapse and sob my eyes out multiple times but it’s not like i can get meds for depression or adhd bc that’s also not that bad and im also fine there but yk my mental health is more believed than my physical health…..nice i mean its not like those too coralate…..noooooo neverrrr it’s not like ever breakdown i have about being disabled ends up with me slicing myself open noooo i mean its not that she knows im self harming again or want to kms constantly but if she did that would get the most help not the reason why i do those things and think those things nooo god sowmtimes i fucking hate being the way i am and my parents being the way they are

#tw self harm mention #tw suicide mention #i hate being disabled

[triggeringtommy]

Trigger warning ed suicide drugs LOL

very upset that my partner came and saw me smoking weed and had a serious talk with me abt how ik it makes me throw up bc im allergic so why am i still doing it and i said bc it's better than cutting myself that shits more embarrassing and then they said well ik u made urself puke the other day how long has that been going on again,, i said at least this whole year so far i cant remember its been sooo long of me doing it tbh u can try to hide bulimia but u can't hide a slit wrist /: im big fucked up rn mentally like not doing good yall she thinks ima kms from a slow heart attack from my lack of potassium which I've honestly always thought I would od on fent personally or do so much coke I hav a heart attack bc that's my drug of choice butttt noooooo

i have to check myself into a mental health facility once i get back from FL on April 11th most likely,,, i genuinely want to stop but it feels like i can't help myself at this point idk I'm embarrassed and sad and rly angry at myself abt it bc im moving into a new house boutta take a trip back to my hometown to be with my best friends and theeennnnn at the end of it all I gotta send myself away to better myself but fuck it's gonna be scaryyy

#personal #ed trigger warning #suicide mention #shit happens #:( #i feel ignorreedddd and it makes everything even worse the ppl im going to visit dont understand the sevirity of what im putting myself thru #i feel like everything is out of my control except my ED rn #its fucking awful

[pseudopoeticism]

ohhh. OHHHHHHHH I FUCKED UP BRO. OHHHHHH FUCK. OHHHHOHOHOHOHOHOHOH NOOOOOO. HOW DO I OR DO I NOT EXPLAIN THIS. HE DELETED IT. IM GONNA KMS I"M SORRYYYYYYYYY YOU ARE NOT ABLE TO SEE THIS ANYMOREEEEEEEE GAHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK did this ruin everythign? am i done??? is this over????? oh my god does he hate me?????? im going to kill myself ohhhhhh my god bro i couldn't support him and it had no fucking traction so he just took it off himself i'm so. GAHHHHHHHHHH> FUCKING GODAMMIT I MISSED THE GOOD BOY WINDOW I AM GONNA LOSE MY FUCKING SHIT i promise i want to help you. i see you more as a sex thing. please please pleas goddamit i promise you are like fucking everything to me right now but my stupid dignity and pride and all that other shit is holding me back and that's no excuse and i'm fucking worthless piece of shit who deserves to be blocked and killed.

[teddybeartoji]

re4 yap

i'm now over 10h in i think i just started chapter 10 meaning i just finished the most fucked up one......

there are TWO things that always freak me the fuck out in video games n movies - 1. when blood drips from the ceiling GODDDDDDDDDD I HATE THAT SOOOOO MUCHH IDK IT'S SO FUCKING CREEPY JUST THE TWO DROPS OF BLOOD ON YOUR HAND AND THEN AAAAAAAA WHAT IF THERE'S A GUY UP THERE I MEAN THERE HAS TO BE BC OF THE BLOOD BUT WHAT IF IT'S LOOKING AT MEEEE AAAAAAAAAAAA horrible 2. when things that shouldn't move MOVE like statues or mannequins.................. kms i can't do it i CANNNOTTT DO ITTT when they stop moving when you look at them but move when you turn around ASHGJAGWHJDBLK EVEN TALKING ABOUT IT IS MAKING ME FEEL SICKK NOOOOOO and now to my actual point... resident evil has done BOTH OF THESE THINGSSS PLEASEE SOMEBODY SAVE MEEE tell me why i was stuck in a dark library with a fucking lantern and then "zombies" IN ARMOR IN FULL ARMOR THEY WERE LIKE FUCKING KNIGHTS started coming alive (u definitely want a visual so here it is put it at 3:45)

THESE MF'S WERE RUNNINNGGG I WAS GONNA PISS MYSELF I WENT DOWN THE STAIRS AND I THOUGHT IT'D BE SAFE THERE AND THEN YOU JUST HEAR THE TINCAN RATTLING DOWN THE STEPS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE YOU KIDDINGGG and then they just put you in a room FILLED with them wait did i say that i didn't have any weapons in this chap i'm so glad i have mastered the good old dodging and weaving method whewww

and they did the same thing in the re8 rose dlc too......... the fucking mannequins.................. (yes i just hit you with a jerma gameplay vid what about it play it at 3:22:32) i was so close to just not finishing it lmaoo pls i DO NOT FUCK WITH THATTT singlehandedly the scariest re moment of all time and i've played re2, re3, re7, re8 and now re4 i'm never touching that dlc again i can promise you that

+ i love ada oh my fucking god i love ada i need her to be my wife yeah leon is hot and all buT HAVE YOU SEEN ADAAAAAAAAAAAA okay no but leon with his holsters and the tramp stamp that we all know he has whoooooweee it's getting hot in here funny thing is i have a very similar jacket hehehe i could do a cosplay that'd be funny

#nothing special here dw #mayor of loserville