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fumifooms · 2 years

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L’s sugar addiction & self-medication : character analysis

I have some thoughts on L and his relationship to sugar that I haven’t seen from others yet surprisingly, so I’m making this post that hopefully won’t get too long definitely became long af. I’m very open to counter-arguments or people adding on to this.

Some context: I 100% see L as autistic and there’s honestly no debate to be had, even though I don’t think it was done intentionally. (I respect others having different perspectives, I just think it’s objectively the most fitting label/explanation and I’ll act like it’s a given through this analysis). I’m autistic myself, “high-functioning” meaning I mask decently enough, diagnosed at 18 and started taking concerta for attention this month at 19, I’m also INTP if that matters and yeah uh as a kid I identified a lot with L and Near and wow surprise surprise I got a bit unhealthily reliant on sugar for a while there, so here I go.

Other context headcanons: L has autism, but is undiagnosed, which I believe mostly because Wammy’s House seems to be outside of the government and society’s eye and it didn’t seem concerned with diagnosis or mental health, the time at which Death Note was written in, and just general vibes idk. Even if he was diagnosed, he strikes me as the kind of autistic who wouldn’t care about the label and wouldn’t give much thought to it -mostly because he gives 0 shit about masking tbh and he’s highly fact oriented-, thinking he works well as he is and that medication would change him and the rupture to his habits sound unpleasant, even if down the line it’d be very helpful and it actually doesn’t change you as a person chill. Yeahh, I have an aversion to drugs of any kind, outside stuff affecting my brain chemistry just gives me a big nope, that’s including alcohol, coffee and painkillers, so I can relate even if it’s something I have to get over, and he seems the type of not wanting to be under any effect. Anyways point is: he doesn’t take meds and isn’t super aware of his condition, despite being knowledgeable in his habits and needs in many regards in canon, on the spot I’m thinking about his sitting pose = brain power stat for example.

So why the sugar? The canon explanation is something along the lines of it giving him the energy he needs because he sleeps so little. Yeah fair, that does make sense, and also fits in with what I’ll be talking about:

My explanation: L self-medicates with sugar, which lead to sugar addiction. And I’m being 100% unironic. Those words are thrown around jokingly a lot but sugar addiction is a real issue that doesn’t get addressed much. Confirmation that L’s relationship with sugar is an addiction might even have been like, explicitely stated in canon at some point? But I haven’t seen that around and my memory really isn’t that good. So yeah there’s probably L’s picky food taste because of autism sensory issues in there as well, him just liking the taste and all and wanting same food, but this level of always eating it is more than just a preference. I’m sorry fellow autistic guy that only ate potatoes for all his life and got massive problems, but at least potatoes don’t influence your brain chemistry. Even if it started as a preference and continues to be such, if he’s addicted or not with how much of it he consumes is out of his hands. And where my earlier rambling comes in is: I think he’s unaware that it’s an addiction, I think he doesn’t think much of it, he overestimates his agency and control over his diet, even if he does recognize his dependency on it to a degree. L eats sweets pretty much constantly in canon, so that part won’t be argued about, I’m more interested in the why and how of it.

Let’s refine what sugar addiction is a bit, have this article. (It implied at one point that sugar can’t be truly/gravely addicting but it shows facts comprehensively so I’ll let it slide) Sugar addiction pretty much demands that you eat sugar constantly to get the effects (energy, stimulation that makes your head feel clearer) you seek, when the addiction is in full swing. Sounds self-explanatory yet? Is sugar addiction real? Further reading: healthline.com article, theguardian article, someone’s journey. It’s a complex and debated issue, and sugar is still something important to have in certain quantity in our bodies, I don’t claim to be a biochemist or expert on the topic.

Ok but why sugar? Why would he get addicted? Why does L feel like he need it? Well even if it wasn’t a full on addiction, which in his case it is, sugar gives energy, as mentioned, it can somewhat act as a stimulant. Without mentioning that sugar is widely spread and seen as pretty casual, it’s easy to get into eating it way too much and thinking nothing of it, like coffee, especially if you don’t suspect your craving of it is tied in with how your brain works. In autism, if you tend to be understimulated, you can get prescribed stimulant medication that’s intended or generally given to people with ADHD, like me with concerta, it’s really not that uncommon. Have these article tidbits that adress it as self-medication:

(article 1: addcrusher.com “How You Are Self-medicating your ADHD” - Article 2: Medium.com “Why Adults With Undiagnosed ADHD Often Turn To Self-medication”)

Why do you think L needs stimulants in the first place? He has shown to want more stimuli in general, rather than being overstimulated, even if he does like to have a calm controlled environment. I, too, am an autistic person that gets understimulated easily, which mostly leads me to listen to fast paced music as stimming when doing college exams, etc. L seeks the mental stimulation of puzzles and it’s the only thing he shows interest in doing (canon), again because of the stimulating entertainment factor. Because he doesn’t mind situations that put him under pressure, or in contact with a team of people or in public. He doesn’t mask to appear nice or neurotypical, but he does show no discomfort about an overwhelming amount of stimuli in general. Also because he stims in other ways than solving cases: tapping his feet, playing with food, etc. And, last of all, the reason of this essay, because he eats sweets all the time.

Okay, but sugar as self-medication? Really? Where does your personal experience come into this? Like I’ve mentioned here and there, I get understimulated easily and I only started taking stimultant meds veryyyy recently. That stuff is instinctual; you’ll tap your feet mindlessly if you need more stimulation, if you’re hungry you’ll eat, if you want coffee you’ll get it, if you have a lil sugar craving you’ll seek to quench it, even if you don’t really know why. You do what makes you happy, and if sugar makes you feel good for a while, makes you feel energized or think more clearly then subconsciously you’ll start wanting it more often, hence why you start out not thinking much of it. I wouldn’t describe my case as an addiction, I don’t think I really got withdrawal or super bad or anything, but there definitely were days when i’d constantly be craving and/or eating sweets, always taking breaks from fruitless work to grab another sugary snack every 15 minutes or every hour. Gummies or other candies, cookies, marshmallows, and for a while even literal packets of refined sugar. They were food cravings like any other, feels like “I want some pizza”, but underlaced with need, and a feeling that you’ll feel and function better once you’ve gotten it. But the craving never stops, and you’re never satisfied, you only ever end up taking more and more and more. Yeah, I’d class my experience as an attempt at self-medication, definitely. Often when I'd take a lot and keep surrendering to the craving for more it’d just lead to more intense hyperactivity, manic symptoms and my body going bonkers with sweating and shaking and stuff, but sometimes it’d genuinely help me focus on schoolwork and on concentration.

Conclusion: It’s a stimulant, so it helps L. It makes him feel like it’s helping him think better and be more awake, so he takes more. It keeps working to some degree even if it’s unhealthy, so he never stops it or tries alternatives. That’s kind of all there is to it, in the end. L puts a great deal of interest in his mental state for productivity purposes, but has never seemed to have any care in his body’s health at all, so I don’t think he’d care to change even if he knew how bad it was anyways.

Tangent: I also like the thought of Wammy’s House being pretty abusive in that neglectful (and manipulative) way and Watari being such an enabler, all focused on performance rather than healthy behavior and thought processes, which does work for iq results apparently but at what cost. L and Mello especially def have some self-destructive habits. Anyways yeah- I like that angle instead of the whole thing being “haha quirky”, it sounds narratively consistant and compelling for the tone of the Death Note franchise. I’m sure Watari honestly believes he’s doing a good thing and helping L working at his best condition, to some degree, but yeahhh feeding the guy under your care only sweets for years without steering him towards healthier alternatives is bad if we want to do a realistic analysis, especially if you’re the one who raised him/organized the environment in which he grew up.

Actual conclusion, more in-depth: So what does this all mean for his character, if I’m getting angstier: L is driven into his detective work not because of some grand passion or ambition (canon), but because working on cases is the only thing interesting enough for him (also canon) aka the only thing that gives him enough stimuli to not be understimulated and painfully bored, but for that lifestyle of constantly chasing high stimulation he also needs substances that give him a rush. The whole thing is extremely unhealthy and unsustainable and L will crash and burn out eventually at any given moment. Kind of a tragic character, huh. He died on his thoughest case ever, his interest driving him to take risks and get more invested and stressed than ever.

L’s laser focus on objective productivity while ignoring the fact that he has human physical needs just like everyone else, likely from a feeling of superiority and uniqueness not entirely unfounded, makes him blind to his very real issues. Being an irl L isn’t cool, it’s sad and unhealthy, cringy for everyone else around you. You may think you have metaphysics and the meaning of life or lack thereof pegged, but that won’t do you any good while you’re on the floor in a manic episode or burnout. I’ve been there mate, but seriously, gain perspective and grow some self-care, being purely statistic oriented is stupid.

Give this man concerta. And a therapist he’ll condescendingly dismiss and talk over, but therapy nonetheless.

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independentartistbuzz · 4 years

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7 From The Women: Laura Baron

What have you been working to promote lately?

I am currently promoting singles from my upcoming album. “Breakfast With Buddha” due out in June/July 2020. “High Gear,” a groovin’ pop track from the album was just released as a single. I plan to shine a light on one single per month releasing the whole album in late spring. My next release in April will feature a music video, “Refugee.” The song, featuring a world/acoustic backdrop, highlights the strength and diversity of displaced and homeless people. Fleeing for their lives they embody the spirit of resourcefulness and courage. It is what keeps the refugee walking, sailing, and riding throughout the ages towards a better life. As a woman and an artist, I am committed to using my musical compositions and recordings to bring inspiration to a world in need of the healing power of music.

Please tell us about your favorite song ever written, recorded or produced by another woman and why it’s meaningful to you?

Wow! That’s a tough one. There are so many songs by women that have changed my life. #1 is Natural Woman by Carole King!

Natural Woman – recorded by Aretha Franklin and written by Carole King. This song speaks to the power, sensuality and deep emotion of being a woman. The energy of the primal blues combined with the melody and powerful lyrics is intense. I love to perform this one as it reaches down into my heart and soul!

Chelsea Morning - Joni Mitchel - A beautiful light-filled acoustic folk song that captures the sunshine and beauty of a new romance. Soaring melodies and poetic lyrics that I absorbed as a teen helped form the songwriter I am today.

I am a Town - Mary Chapin Carpenter - This song emerged from the heart of a one-of-a-kind storyteller. Her lyrics take me places with the breathtaking pictures she paints with her words. Her rich voice and graceful style land gently on my mind.

I Can’t Make You Love Me - Bonnie Raitt – written by Allen Shamblin/Michael Reid. The ache of the blues performed by one of the great female blues vocalists of our time. One of the most covered songs and for good reason. It takes us on a journey of loneliness and heartache. Says so much with a simple yet powerful lyric. Bonnie’s voice is like dark chocolate. My first Bonnie Raitt song which I learned in high school was Love Me Like a Man! I was sold on the blues from that day forward!

What does it mean to you to be a woman making music/in the music business today? Do you feel a responsibility to other women to create messages and themes in your music?

I do feel responsible to create messages and themes with my songs that make a difference, are meaningful to the listener and draw attention to causes I believe in. I have a deep desire to support women (and girls) in breaking free from restrictions and truly having the breathing space to reach their highest potential.

I believe in causes that are important to women, but my audience includes men, too. I strive to express in my music the innate strength and power of the human spirit and the positive impact we make when we work together to tackle tough problems. I want to shine a light on areas that are often overlooked or in the shadows.

Some of my areas of focus include...

REFUGEES:

My upcoming 2020 music video release “Refugee” shows the determination and the strength of refugees as they face such hardships in our world. The video includes scenes of mothers in their struggle to find safety for their children. The track will also be a part of my 2020 album.

NEW YORK DIVERSITY:

My 2019 music video “On the Streets of New York” pays homage to the Statue of Liberty. New York (my place of birth) is a melting pot of those millions that sailed into Ellis Island with nothing more than a suitcase and a dream. My great grandparents made that journey from Poland and Russia to Ellis Island, New York, a land of hope, inclusiveness and possibility. The track will also be a part of my 2020 album.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AWARENESS:

My 2015 music video, “A Little Note” tells the story of a woman who breaks free from an abusive relationship. She leaves a note telling her man goodbye as she quickly slips out of his life. Through the research I did while running my Indiegogo fundraising campaign I learned so much about the effects of domestic violence. I shared the video with my audience as well as organizations that help victims to take steps (carefully and safely) to remove themselves from danger. The song received a Wammie (Washington Area Music Award) Song of the Year.

ADOPTION ADVOCATE:

The title track of my album “Heart of The Great Unknown” was written for my daughter Ruchi whom my family adopted from an orphanage in New Delhi, India in 2011. I support families opening their homes and hearts to children who need forever families.

Who was the first female artist you saw that made you want to create music/be in the business?

Joni Mitchell. She combined amazing lyrics, unique guitar chords, and of course she had the voice of an angel. Her open tunings felt very exotic after learning the basic 1, 4, 5, chord progressions. Many of my earliest songs as a teen were based on Mitchell’s vibe and sound. As she moved into her jazzy phase those sounds also were reflected in my more jazzy side which would emerge in coming years. Since I was a teen I was not in the music business yet, however I was one of the stars :) of my high school coffee house series. I took it all seriously while loving every minute of it: the writing, rehearsing and taking to the stage to perform, connecting with other musicians and the audience. This carries forward until today. Bonnie Raitt was also very influential in my formative years. Her style awoke in me the dark, primal blues that helped my jazz stylings take root.

My song, “High Gear” combines the blues, jazz and pop combo that I enjoy so well today.

What female artists inspire you and influence you today?

Indie/AMERICANA: Brandi Carlile: Her superb voice and excellent songwriting inspires me to reach higher and give my all.

Joy Williams: If I need a good cry, Joy’s music is one place I go. Joy’s voice wraps me up in a warm embrace. Her honest and emotive vocals and delivery reach deep. She reminds me to come from a very genuine place inside and be the unique artist that I am today, authentic and ready to contribute.

Jazz/Pop: Nora Jones: Norah put jazz on the map in the pop world. She is understated yet very present with her totally cool vibe and her amazing laid-back vocals. She is an example of how softer jazz mixes well with pop holding a unique place in today’s music.

Diana Krall: The most suave diva of jazz in modern times. I love her piano playing, her timing, her rich and amazing vocals. I can only listen and admire this Goddess of jazz.

Marian Hill: Very cool electro pop/jazz. She has inspired me to make my jazz sound jibe more with elements of modern pop genres.

Lena Horn: the first jazz artist I heard. Lena and her band including that walking bass lit me up at a very young age. A great upright bass gets me humming and snapping every time.

Bossa Nova/Latin: the light, sensual voices of some of Brazil’s great vocalists got inside my bones and awakened me to a whole world of female artistry. I came to understand that very light, syncopated singing could have great impact.

A few of my favorites: Rossa Passos Elis Regina Astrud Gilberto

What was the most challenging thing you have had to face as a female artist?

Splitting my time as a Mom and a pro artist has been a challenge. My biggest challenge is getting a healthy income from licensing my music. There are countless other amazing female artists out syncing their music on TV/Film. I was signed to the Discovery Network. I am getting closer to earning real money, but it takes an amazing amount of fortitude and perseverance.

If you could form an all-female supergroup, who would play in it?

Some artists from my home town of DC and some national stars: Guitar and Vocals: Laura Baron Guitar: Susan Rowe (DC guitarist) Drums: Lisa Taylor (DC drummer) Bass: Amy Shook (DC bass) Back up Vocals: Becky Bliss of Barnaby Bright (national act) Piano: Diana Krall (the legend)

Listen to “High Gear” below:

Connect with Laura Baron:

https://www.laurabaronmusic.com/

https://www.facebook.com/LauraBaronMusicPage

https://twitter.com/LauraBaronMusic

#feminist #7 from the women #independent artist #laura baron #independent musician #feminist music #feminism #female musician #Female Empowerment #women empowerment #women in music

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