#need a speedbag

[trashisnice]

Physically I’m not a feral cat being put into a carrier, but emotionally I’m a feral cat being put into a carrier.

#control issues and rage #need a speedbag #and a hug

[clumsyexpression]

hiii, i love ❤️ your Ace hc, w him pacing a hole in the ground and all. made me think up a fic for it (i'll tag you when it's done!)

anyway, can i request one where he reacts to a fem!reader doing yoga? sorry, i been into yoga lately and it made curious! (did i mention i love Ace?)

okay, you're wonderful, bye! \(@-@'|

Whooooweeeee,

so sorry this is late – I had some WIPs to get outta the way, and also, um, life, but just letting you know you have been heard and im super flattered that you like my writing?? So much so, that you would want a request??? sfbbfnsdbsiufbfskfjsafb Hmmm, so im not very familiar with yoga, but I am somewhat if…faintly, at this point in my life lmao familiar with going to the gym and working out and I tell ya, what an experience lol So if you don’t mind me taking it from there, I’m pretty sure all of this would transpire if Ace noticed you in the gym:

Ace x fem!Reader in the gym minding her business and Ace is too lol

You thought you were doing your pre-workout stretches alone, and you find it strange that your movements are being mirrored in your peripherals even though you aren’t standing next to one?? You look over and this guy is trying his hardest to play it cool and to be polite but he’s been staring at you so long that he began to copy everything you do, since, if you’re doing it, it can’t be weird for him to do it too?? You only laugh from the flattery of his gestures.

You know when someone is super focused until something really interesting catches their attention? Well Ace could be hitting the speedbag, doing some full-on Tae Bo on a punching bag and will get absolutely r o c k e d  when the momentum comes back at him from staring at you for too long. You’re minding your business and suddenly hear someone get sacked - only to look over and find a man giving you a goofy grin similar to that of piano keys since the 4 missing teeth that should be filling his mouth is lying on the floor and you’re not gonna question how someone can get a self-inflicted black-eye from a dummy opponent.

You hit the treadmill, doing your thing, and then all of a sudden you feel like you need to run for your life since Crash Bandicoot over here is trying to out-race the treadmill beside you, trying his best to impress you as he backflips over the little ‘speedbump’ when you finally ask if he’s ‘’’’okay’’’’ he’ll explain that the little strip that keeps passing through is a lil speed bump and they’re (whoever ‘they’ are lmao) tryna trip you up if you’re not careful but really its just where the belt on the machine had been fused together lmao

Wrapping up the workout session, you decide to power down by walking the indoor track that wraps around the whole gym. Being in the outer ring that’s designated for walking, you can’t help but notice how there seems to be a fire spout developing in the inner lanes of the track and no one is really taking note of it - especially since there appears to be a man LITERALLY BURNING in thought and another idea more may very well cause him to be engulfed.

Well, as it turns out, it only took one more occasional glance to you - and for you to be looking back - for that to happen and now everyone has increased gym membership fees, all thanks to you deciding to coincide your workout session with Ace that day. Sure, he did all the fire damage and what not, but if you weren’t so dang hot-

#aaaaaaaa i do look forward to your fic btw - do do DOOOO tag me so i can have meself a nice read :D #and i apologize to anyone who this might ruin but Ace definitely built like Crash Bandicoot #but we love him anyway <3 #one piece #one piece x reader #portgas d ace #fire fist ace #pink thread of fate

[fanged-cotl]

Please don't apologize for simply expressing how you feel. We can't bottle these things up forever, so these meltdowns happen some times.

They are normal and understandable, and you shouldn't have to apologize for not being perfect.

Talking can help release the pressure to delay these moments of despair, but it isn't some sort of panacea. Medication also isn't a miracle maker for everyone, and at least in my experience mostly serves to create a base level of stability to work towards improving from.

Some times a break can also be sorely needed. Just avoiding negative things for a while to sort of reset the brain into a more neutral mood.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that your experience is normal, relatable even, and not something to apologize for.

Your friends and loved ones will help wherever possible, even if some times it is necessary to figure out how. Hell, I can come off anon and DM you if you want (Anxiety makes sending non-anon asks difficult for me, but I don't mind talking in DMs)

Some times figuring out the way forward can be extremely difficult and require research and planning. Some times you need to sit down and make a big ol' boring list of ideas, possibilities, and plans for how to make things work, and then painstakingly go through all that stuff before you're allowed to use life's ballsack like a speedbag

thank you most of my replies to these have just been "thank you" but i have read them all and I do really mean it

#ask

[kobblefort]

Rushsly: The Early Days 2

She's done it! Osgi made a wool turban. Besides "menacing with spikes of sheep wool"(???) it has no real interesting aspects, but it's pretty valuable and now I have one less kobold meltdown to worry about. The kobolds also demanded I build a temple for "The Goldenrod Creed," a religion about worshipping rainbows and the rain. And yeah sure I can get down with rainbows, I fuck with rainbows.

Looks pretty cool I think. Their priest is called "Holy Fish." I gave the job to a new arrival called "Cokuk Warnbarbs" and I'm sure I won't regret placing a hateful, greedy kobold in a position of religious authority.

Humans showed up to trade and seem to just be stuck here. The rabbits haven't left either. We didn't actually have any crafts to trade with the humans so they just sort of stood around. Eventually I read that when this happens you can get them to leave by deleting the trade depot. However this also made the humans just drop everything they brought and leave. I guess that made it our stuff. Well this could be a funny exploit but I don't know if they'll just see it as stealing.

Before the migrant wave even finishes I have to make it clear that this is not a hunter-friendly fortress. If you want to run around shooting arrows do that shit somewhere else. We don't do that here.

We're getting quite a sizeable population now and whoa hey hold up what the fuck

Some ratfolk dickhead broke in!!! A peasant Almda is just punching the absolute fuck out of her. Just going at her head like a fucking speedbag.

I mean holy shit

I love when they say this.

As Almda beat the ratfolk to death, a woodcrafter created their masterpiece across the room. Can you imagine being that kobold. Just like "whoa, that's crazy. I'm busy though"

Things are going smoothly. I'm trying a different bedroom setup for once. Glass production is going kind of slow, they keep canceling stuff because they "need sand-bearing item" (it's usually right next to them but they won't use it for some reason) I'm sure there's some way to fix this but I'm not sure what it is. "I ball to remember" - thought that came to me so vividly while i walked through the kitchen that I had to say it out loud. "I ball to forget" the only logical conclusion to that thought.

Rushsly was elevated to a Warren (kobble version of a barony) and crystal glass operations are up and fucking running baby!!! Big things poppin!!!!! We also have enough fucking iron and billon to get absolutely rich but the faster the economy go up the sooner we're likely to get raided and there's still no military here. You might be wondering how I got all these magma furnaces without embarking on a volcano or digging into Caverns 3 well baby I fucking cheated. I busted open DFhack with ` and I went to gui/liquids and I made some little magma pockets. I don't know how to get kobbles to move around buckets of magma without killing themselves in the process but if I did I would still probably do this. I'm still ultimately just using the resources I have and I'd never outright cheat to fix a kobble's mood or survive a siege or anything like that, sometimes I just get sick of the clerical bullshit! Maybe that sounds fun to you. Maybe it sounds insane for me to say that about a game that is, in essence, literally just clerical bullshit, but what is more insane than caring? I am still going to attempt to make steel completely legitimately, if you think me speeding things up so that I don't have to deforest the entire map and wait three times as long for the coal to actually get moved around ruins the integrity of the fortress then I don't know just stop fucking reading and you'll be better off.

We are also establishing a hospital even before we establish a barracks (I have decided to go the military route after all though traps are still in the cards) and guess how I got those water tiles two z-levels beneath those wells. Go ahead guess. Actually it's not a great solution because they will eventually dry up given enough use and I certainly don't want to manually re-fill them but by the time that becomes a problem I should be able to breach the caverns (relatively) safely and make me a mother fucking pump stack. I refuse to use windmills because I believe they make power too easy while also providing a really bad defensive weakness (I have had a forgotten beast break in through the axle tunnels and slaughter my entire fortress because of that one-tile-wide vulnerability) so drawing waterwheel power from the caverns is simply what I'm going to have to do. And yes I know that's a weird double standard for a guy who magically summons the water and magma from console commands but this is not a competitive game!!! When you boot up Dwarf Fortress it's YOUR choice whether you want to play as some kind of omnipotent god, minor deity, or literally just advisor to your little ant-farm of fake people. And I like being a minor deity with power over little time-and-effort-saving things but ultimately leaving matters of actual survival in the hands of my kobbles.

Just found a fat-ass native platinum vein, you wish you were me so bad.

A big part of why I'm so hesitant to breach the cavern layers is actually just that once you do, all your un-floored areas start growing cave fungus, which I hate. It can even start growing trees which will bust through your entire base but you can't really cut them down early you just have to literally build floor over them which is annoying and takes up so many resources. Some of it, like the red fungus, looks cool but most of it just looks ugly. However it does let you pasture your animals indoors which is always a boon, invaders fucking love to kill animals and if you can just have them sealed off in their own little chamber where nothing bad happens to them you don't have to worry about them. Once the kobolds get barracks set up and a bit of training under their belts I guess I'm just going to have to deal with it.

Right we've fucked around long enough, barracks time. And I smoothed them because if they're going to be stuck "constant training" they may as well get to enjoy the place. I particularly like having the dungeon right next to the barracks because it means any attempted jailbreakers will have to try and sneak through a room full of heavily-armored goons who are in the middle of swinging their weapons around. I don't really have the logistics set up for leather armor but I have an absolute fuckton of iron so it might be good enough to just make a 10-kobble melee squad and 10-kobble xbow squad with iron armor. For some reason, holding off until I have steel production up and running just seems like a bad idea.

I saw this notification and thought "oh shit, is there another thief or something" but it turned out my kobble actually just had a panic attack at work thinking about her friend dying in the Fucked Up Bridge Incident. This is a fucked up game. If you ever ask "what kind of god would make monkeys that get anxiety and have to drive big metal boxes to go operate a deep fryer all day," well, us I guess. We do that. Maybe this is what "god made man in his own image" means right. We've literally evolved so much that we can simulate being the same uncaring god doing the same awful things to little unassuming people. As above so below. I feel pretty normal playing Dwarf Fortress. It feels like a very natural behavior to me. Am I simply taking after my own creator

Ratfolk tried to sneak in, but gave up the element of surprise by shooting at some boar halfway across the map. Welp time to lock shit down! To be honest they seem more like they got lost on a hunting trip than they came here to fuck with us but we don't actually need to go topside for much of anything. And that "anything" includes making a good 10 or 20 sets of iron armor. Be our guests ratfolk... stay as long as you like.

Sometimes when I'm just sitting here doing this, I think about how happy I'd be with a soul-sucking spreadsheet job. Like the guy from OfficeSpace was such a bitch! What was with Generation X and going "no maaan, you don't want a job with fixed hours where you don't get cut or burned or blow out your knees! Having the same weekend every week and only having to worry about fucking up your posture will suck your soul out, maaaan!" Passing papers around pointlessly and doing fake social niceties for it sounds great. If it's so bad then give up your fucking paid vacations and holidays off and liveable pay and just switch places with the guy pushing carts around the Wal-Mart parking lot while 60 year old Xanax addicts in pickup trucks and SUVs try to run him down as practice for when they finally live their ultimate wish fulfillment by driving their car into a bunch of protestors for daring to temporarily mildly inconvenience them.

Not now bunnies

Oh I guess they have no beef with each other. That sort of makes sense they're both rodents right. Well uhh they just keep standing there on the edge of the map.

It seems kind of arrogant for William Shakespeare to say "All the world's a stage." Maybe not arrogant, but I don't know, of course you see it that way, you're a fucking playwright. What about everyone else? To the dishwasher, is all the world that salad you barely even took three bites of? What about to the soldier? Is all the world a target, a threat, an enemy? It is convenient for us to only see life through a pinhole. Both for us and the next pigeon up on the higher wire. Life isn't really a play or a fight or any one thing but as long as you never drop out you don't have to worry about that. You can stay right on a track and become a software engineering guy who can't cook instant noodles for himself or tell the difference between different species of trees. People always told me "ginkgo biloba trees smell like cum" but I've never smelled it. I've never really considered cum to have a smell, maybe I just don't have smelly cum. I mean I know the smell of a cum rag you toss in the corner of a room that you ended up forgetting for way too long and had to throw away, but that's more of just a bacterial smell to me I think and I've never smelled something like that while I was walking out in public, even around ginkgo biloba trees. It feels like you can generate infinite cum in life sometimes, like even when you haven't eaten or drank you can still make some come out of you, but you will run out eventually. I'm not sure about the "semen retention" guys, I kind of believe more in the "balance of fluids" thing. You can definitely have an excess of cum sometimes and it makes you act like a fucking idiot. If you don't jack off or otherwise dispel excess semen (as if anybody even has sex anymore - Not gonna catch me doing that nerd shit!) at least once every few days everyone can tell and they think you're wound-up and stuck-up and way too aggressive over little things. At the same time if you masturbate too much that's also weird and everyone can tell that too. Just do it once every two or three days to keep your levels normal. Hop on e621, punch in "breast_expansion dragon" and you're good to go. You're normal again.

Some migrants showed up, got into some martial trances, and then all died futilely to the four ratfolk rangers that kinda just won't fuck off. Well, actually, one of them went home. I guess he got his fill of fucking around. I don't really feel the urge to take revenge because I didn't know any of those guys really. We don't really need a fish cleaner and we certainly don't need any milkers or shearers so I don't know what to tell you. Bad day to show up. You really should have phoned ahead. You really should not have showed up to your girlfriend's house after she ignored your calls for like 3 hours obviously she was cheating on you!!! Sometimes a girl is just giving you those psilocybin mushrooms to try and subtlely convince you that you want to break up instead of just saying "we should break up" maybe direct communication isn't that great maybe you should just play weird interpetive-dance games with each other trying to change each other's minds instead. Sorry. I said I wasn't going to talk about David Cage.

Alsrta, previously the gelder, is now our Caravan Voice (manager) because Anl was stuck in a strange mood that I thought was going to fail but we managed to sneak a kobble out to collect a single log for him. She seems better at it anyway. Also, after drinking booze straight from the barrel even though there are plenty of cups, she gave birth to three children: Anl Crystaldepth (badass name) Iltos Coveredspells (decent name) and Zhatrsi Homagebutters (I'm sorry lil lady) making the need for protection clearer than ever. Death and birth within just moments of each other. Existence, even in this little pixelated simulation, is far too complicated to ever summarize with just a witty quote, but we keep trying. Maybe there really is an all-encompassing philosophical Theory Of Everything that's catchy and fits in as many characters as a tweet. Before they let the Twitter Blue perverts write as much as they want, I mean. I'm not sure 140 is realistic but 280 could probably fit it. Everything in the whole universe can be flattened into one slogan. Why else would everyone be trying to build an ideology out of little quotes and zingers

The kobolds are dancing around and listening to stories casually like there aren't any murderous ratfolk creeping around outside. Feels kind of opposite to real life. Everyone locked away in their McMansion is glued to one of three boxes telling them that everything is going to hell and everyone is out to get them and that we are in an untold flood of violence and despair. Then you go outside and you walk through that "bad neighborhood" and it's just people going to the store to get fucking groceries like everybody else. But I guess kobolds live more communally. And I can't say I'd ever want my bedroom to be right next to anyone else's ever again - even if I do get a box and a cabinet!

Some of that food they be making sounds good as hell

Kody Inkblighted has an appropriate name for someone who is regaling everyone with poetry. Apparently it also thought the last person doing poetry sucked.

DANKNESS AND NOTHING MORE LOL!!!!!

That peasant got their head bashed in with a crossbow so fucking hard that it exploded. That's pretty fucked up. I guess it's kinda even for our kobble punching that thief in the head over and over until they died but we only killed one of them and they killed five of us and it's not like we went out to fuck with them, they were literally sneaking around trying to steal our stuff. Well folks I hit 30 images and I'm high as fuck and honestly the things I'm about to do to a tuna sandwich would not be allowed on television in ANY country. I'll be here though not doing shit else so expect another post in I don't know a few hours I guess

#dwarf fortress #kobblefort

[personalitynexus]

D&D for Aqua, Kairi, and/or the Major

{XX}

Name: River

Gender: Female

Race: Satyr

Class: Storm Herald Barbarian (6)

Brief Backstory: Don’t you just want to go Ape Shit for once? The question danced around in River’s mind one dark and stormy night after finding herself lost from home, surrounded by monsters on two legs wearing iron and steel armor and weapons. It wasn’t until she picked up a great-axe with a leather wrapped grip that something inside her clicked into place, sending her down the Raging path of the Storm Herald ever since.

Random Head canon: River is most at home when it rains. While it doesn’t remind her of her home in the Feywild, it brings her a since of calm and fills her nose and ears with the sounds and scents of life.

Name: Yulak

Gender: Female

Race: Goblin

Class: Monk; Way of the Drunken Master (6)

Brief Backstory: Yulak started her adventuring life in the literal gutter, drunkenly tossed out of every bar on the continent before stumbling with a hangover to the nearest monastery for aide. Little did she know that the monks at the temple were followers of an ancient fighting technique that incorporated and mimicked the mannerisms of a drunkard! Entranced by their ways, Yulak began to study amongst them before setting out to see the world with new eyes... Not any more sober, but certainly not any more drunk than before, having found the blissful nirvana of the perfect drunken stupor to avoid a hangover.

Random Head canon: She tends to use her small stature to her advantage in more than just combat, but often times finds it best suited for hitting the enemies where it hurts the most. Even a drunken goblin monk needs to practice their Flurry of Blows on a ‘speedbag’ every once in a while.

Name: Chroma

Gender: Non-binary (AFAB)

Race: Changeling

Class: Gloomstalker Ranger (3)/Assassin Rogue (3)

Brief Backstory: Chroma set out on their adventure after growing bored with military retirement, quickly adapting the guerilla tactics learned in the service to use lining their purse strings. Armed with more than a few trusty daggers and a smile that can charm a dragon, the changeling is more than willing to claim the world as their oyster.

Random Head canon: Chroma makes the most of being a Changeling an is constantly altering their appearance, sex, and voice from day to day. The problem with this, is that Chroma may have been doing this for so long that they have forgotten what they originally looked and sounded like. A mixed blessing and curse that they aren’t too concerned with at the moment.

#Fallen Master {Aqua} #Keyblade Princess {Kairi} #Public Security Section 9 {Major}

[lesser-mook]

elmo girl vs the boy menace (dawn of gender equality) shitpost

Some ladies really need to stop acting like they're untouchable in modern day. No man worth his testosterone wants to hurt women. The one's who do, are a factory defect due to their parents, period.

Otherwise, those of you with an itchy fist, stop pushing sane men to do what they're naturally not wired to want to do to you.

And for the dudes who let you get away with it, you better be grateful for your #femaleprivilege Because if you were a guy and did that, you would've been in a fight, a big one.

The dudes who hesitate, know exactly what #maleprivilege is worth in a situation like that, NOTHING. Because the female will always be the victim by default.

Ppl see the male as the aggressor, we're stronger. So if that's a reason that we shouldn't hit you? ....WHY is that not a reason for you to not start fights knowing that advantage. Brain dead logic.

Unless you're in a crisis of #selfpreservation KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELVES.

Ladies aren't doing this shit in the middle east or areas where they're not afforded basic rights, so this is definitely a first world specific problem where women have it preeetty fuckin good, all things considered.

Save all that Super Saiyan energy for a mf following you home or actually attacking you first, frfr.

THAT'S when you let your inner Amazon out & fuck his ass up (Kick the shin, jab his top row of front teeth, & chin/ boxing, study Judo throws and UFC kicks)

Just cause men are bigger doesn't mean you're helpless. Do what short guys do, get gains to defend yourself.

"DEFEND YOURSELF", not be a menace.

Otherwise, don't hit mfs because you got triggered at a party or some shit.

Women aren't punching bags to vent that ass kicking you got at work and Men are not your personal speedbags to "discipline" when you don't get your way.

#women are not special #keep your hands to yourself #gender equality #women #men

[izzyspussy]

JSYK, I don't think obligingly is too much for a Jamie POV. His vocabulary is not small. I always think about Roy offering to use his balls as a speedbag and him saying "not especially" rather than "not really." He often goes for bigger words, or unusual phrasing. You could go for obediently, or fully change the phrasing and go for like "get the message and bugger off," but in regards to "too much" for Jamie-voice... he uses more complex vocabulary than be needs to all the time.

I don't think it necessarily feels too complex, but like too... pompous? overly specific? & I guess part of interpreting his voice/vocab is deciding whether the times he used the wrong word in canon was mispronunciation or that he didn't know the right one or whatever other reason. idk this fic is a long one so it's going to get line edited several times so I guess we'll see how it shakes out. at the moment I think it's 'respectfully' but it has also been 'obediently' like you mentioned, 'kindly', and just omitted. *shrug emoji*

#jack facts #jack chats #thanks for the input! #writing process #tatg

[alphateamsfinest]

[ guide ] he can't help it

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒

Jill had never liked crowds- and every time she was forced to endure another her patience for them lessened. It would always pinch her shoulders, and she'd move through it with the paranoia of someone who could be attacked at any moment.

But then there's the soft warmth of his hand on her back, leading her into and through the crowd. The reassurance that she isn't alone for once, that someone is watching out for her. That tightness in her shoulder relaxes without actual effort on her part, and she stays close to Carlos. This time, the afternoon market isn't overwhelming and she's not just rushing to get the scribbled-down ingredients for dinner and leaving before she's even spent ten minutes there. For once, she doesn't need to go home and work out her tension on the speedbag. Instead, she leans against Carlos while he talks to the woman about produce, and allows herself a moment of rest.

#ubcs #answering machine #meme answer #v. Moving on

[xxxlovedandlostxxx]

xxxlovedandlostxxx asked: “  passion  ” (vampire tommy?)

adsagsona answered:

loisnclark:send   “  passion  ”   to   my   inbox   to   give   my   muse   a   passionate   kiss  .   (   send   a   +   reverse  ,   &   my   muse   will   give   yours   a   passionate   kiss  .   )

If it had been up to Tommy, he would have tried to keep his distance from Anthony. He still believed himself very dangerous to the young man. His control had gotten better, his emotions weren't all over the place anymore but his hunger sometimes took over and then it was difficult to return to a normal state.

Training didn't prove much of a challenge anymore but he went through it anyway. He had to be careful with the punching bag and he didn't break out a sweat. He was just unwrapping his hands, another one of those human habits, when Anthony walked up to him.

"What are you..." He began before Anthony cupped his cheeks and pressed a kiss to his lips. Quickly he set his hands on Anthony's shoulders, letting his lips linger too long before pulling away. "Anthony, no..." He whispered.

@adsagsona​

He loved when Tommy trained.... Anthony would sometimes watch.... Either in an official capacity or in secret. Always, he would revel in the man’s prowess. His strength and the beauty of his motion. He loved the sound. Loved the scent of his body in exertion. But Tommy didn’t sweat anymore. He didn’t even breath or gasp, now, except out of habit and reflex. Other than the sounds of speedbags meeting blunt force, there was almost nothing else to indicate that a living person was there doing these things. That was it, wasn’t it? Tommy wasn’t living anymore... He watched, feeling his stomach drop, and his throat go dry. That was still Tommy though. That was still him. He had to keep hold of that... To keep him as Tommy. He rushed forward and took hold of his love’s face in his hands, ignoring the cool sensation of his flesh as their lips met. For a moment, it was like before... Old puzzle pieces slotting in place as they used to. That is, until Tommy drew back.

“I need this,” he whispered. The tone of his voice, while quiet was more harsh than cajoling. More a faint scream than pleading. “Tommy, I need this.”

#adsagsona

[piermanwalter]

Thief's Apprentice chars have a realistic vibe even thogh they are zombie robots bc they are so fucked up. not in the "he's my poor little 🌸 sanrio speedbag 🌸 😔" way but the way even you THE CREATOR doesnt care if people likethem or not so they get realer than most regular human chars. and every day you are coming up with ways to make the game smaler and worse. like you cant long cutscenes to explain chars so every few times they appear must be as interesting as it can.

I think if you first make a character appealing, you then have to do a ton of extra work to make them interesting. The most obvious example of this is character silhouettes, since if you make everyone with the same conventionally attractive body types, you then need to add a lot of details and accessories to differentiate them, but if everyone is different shaped to begin with, you don't need to do that.

Since I'm not putting any effort into making these characters likeable, I can fit a tremendous amount of extra personality into them.

Bear in mind this only works when you don't want the audience to get overly attached to specific characters, since in Thief's Apprentice you are here to rob everyone and be a shithead in general, and it's not the kind of tragic and introspective game where you spend the whole time doing bad things to good people.

#thief's apprentice #anon ask

[saluteofthejugger]

i need a gnome to come and use my trapezius like a speedbag

[secondgenerationnerd]

After someone tells Dahlia she's got her Papa's temper.... “I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.” 

By someone you mean Grace, right? High key, I love writing these cousins, so enjoy <3

------------

Dahlia Todd prefers the speedbag when she’s pissed off. Keeping time in her head as her knuckles burns helps with the anger. 

“Hey!” Grace jumps back as Dahlia swings at her. “Dude, chill!”

“People fucking suck.” The 17 year old seethes, cloudy unfocused eyes staring past her cousin. 

“Yeah, we figured that out when I was 8.” Grace catches the speed bag to stop it. “Do I want to ask what happened?”

“Oh the usual.” Dahlia clicks her tongue to find the bench with her water bottle.

“Dad says you have Uncle Jay’s temper. He’s also the one that thinks Uncle Jay needs anger management.”

“I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.” Dahlia growls. 

“Uh huh....Want to go on patrol and break some noses?”

“Have I mentioned how much I love you?”

#grace drake-kent #dahlia todd #Jason Todd #Tim Drake

[socialuprooting]

BEST SPEED BAGS FOR HOME BOXING GYM

Heart siphoning cardio.

Astounding pressure help.

Ideal practice for dexterity and muscle mind association.

On the off chance that you have not put resources into a speed pack and stage you are passing up a major opportunity!

The speedbag is compelling.

Try not to trust me?

Simply ask anyone, maker of The Speed Bags Bible thus numerous other people who are fixated on this fun, testing and dynamic bit of boxing hardware.

I need to give you a concise prologue to the speed pack, how to pick the correct size, locate the best speed sack, hang the sack, and utilize the speed pack.

So how about we start with first of all, how to pick the correct size speedbag

Our Recommendation Speed Bags

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#boxing #boxing gloves #speed bags

[anxious-acushla]

Hi lovely! Virgo, Libra and Scorpio please! 🥰🥰🥰

Thank you, beautiful!! xx

Virgo: Are you very critical of your own writing? How much do you find yourself editing (either during the writing or after the fact)?

HUGELY critical. At the same time, sometimes I’ve read through a chapter so many times that I miss mistakes...AKA I just did a re-read of both Exhale and CFDD and there are so many minor errors and I am SO SORRY for all of ya’ll and THANK YOU for not pointing them out because I’m hella embarrassed. 

But when it comes to plot/dialogue/etc. I don’t do huge edits? If I’m not fairly content with something I don’t put it on the page? There’s a post going around about how if you’re stuck on a scene you can skip it and come back to it later...ummmm that’s not how my brain works? I have to go in order and I have to be mostly pleased with a scene before I can continue.

Libra: How do you balance writing and life? Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the amount of writing you have to do?

I don’t have much of a life? I do, however, work 60+ hours a week. Writing is my escape from all of that so I make it a priority. I don’t think I’ve ever felt overwhelmed...though I have some holiday gifts I need to start writing and am quite behind on those...

Scorpio: How much research did you have to do for your current wip? What was the weirdest thing you had to google?

Not a ton? It was an idea that came to me and it grew fairly organically from there. Hmmmm. I’ve taken kickboxing courses before but I am not at all skilled with a speedbag so anytime I have Arya using the speed bag I have to remind myself of how those feints work. 

[alitheamateur]

The Grind- Chapter 25

I figured parking the bike in the garage out of plain sight would be my best bet, just in case Tia spaced and happen to pass by Revel’s and let Livvy catch site of me there. As far as she knew, Cal and I were out at the pub for the first preseason Steelers game, grabbing a couple beers. I drafted Tia to persuade her into one measly night off from the unforgiving jump ropes and speedbags to go to some unrealistic, sickening, fucking chick-flick, and maybe allow her a drink. My real whereabouts had to remain unsuspected, at least for now. I planned on filling her in on all the secrets tomorrow night, and pray to God that it didn’t send her spiraling into a hissy fit just 5 days before her match with the Franklin Park gal.

I had never lied this much to anyone in my damn life, which didn’t make the fact that Liv was the victim, any easier. I had prodded through her phone, snuck out on the porch two or three times in the last week to ‘check the mailbox’ that I had already emptied earlier in the day, so I could return a missed call. I bought plane tickets with my Paypal so she wouldn’t see the transactions, and paid Mac $200 to play chauffeur to the airport, all behind the back of the woman in my life. It was for her own good, and for my own peace of mind.

I opted to reach out to Liz first, stealing her number from her daughter’s phone contacts, figuring if she and Tony were anything like my own parents, the lady of the house called the shots. I pleaded with her best I knew how, to promise we keep my little master plan hidden from Liv, and in typical female fashion, she whispered “oooh’s” and “awwww’s” about how I was just ‘too sweet and romantic for my own good.” Shit, you got a lot to learn about me, lady.

They flew in early this morning, and I gave Mac all their hotel info to pass along when he picked them up, so I could spend the day with Liv in peace, not having to duck out to answer a thousand phone calls. The Elliott’s weren’t happy about my fitting the bill for their visit to the ‘Burgh, but I insisted on treating them like royalty for the week they’d be in my city. Anyone with Livvy’s blood in their veins, deserved to be considered as such. No matter how strained the healing relationship between the three of them was, Tony and Liz were still her parents, and I’d give them that respect. Sure, the way they handled some situations with their daughter was lightyears beyond fucking foolish if you ask me, but that wasn’t my battle to fight.

I figured Revel was a happy medium for dinner on their first night. It was just hoity enough to impress them, but not stuffy enough to overwhelm them. I had to scoot Liv out the door first, knowing the dress pants and button up Ralph Lauren would’ve been a dead give away into my long list of fabrications this week. I had to work one-on-one with Tia to organize everything, directing her to keep my lady out late so I could get home first and change inconspicuously. But threaten her not to get Liv completely bombed so she wouldn’t be hung over for the surprise breakfast with her parents tomorrow morning. I only booked their hotel room for two nights, in hopes that this whole shebang wouldn’t pop off in my damn face, and Livvy would let the two of them finish out their visit at our place.

Once my helmet was strapped and locked to the bike, I turned the corner into the main lobby of the restaurant to make my way to the hostess chair. I made sure my guests were seated already, and followed the direction to our corner table, wiping two very sweaty hands on the inside lining of my slacks.

God, please don’t let them laugh me out of this place.

It was like looking straight into the face of Liv in 25 years when I locked eyes with Elizabeth, besides the blonde color of her hair, not matching her child’s now darker strands. I guess I hadn’t noticed the stark resemblance over the video chat. I smiled at the two of them, I could feel it was awkward and forced but I hoped they’d return the gesture regardless. The couple stood, and I greeted the lady first, doing my best to always mind the Ritter manners.

“So nice to meet you in person, Mrs. Eliiott. You and Livvy might as well be twins! I’m uh… I’m Colton.” Her smile wasn’t the warm, sunny one I’d grown so fond of with Liv, but she was kind enough.

Tony, patiently standing to my right, observed every little inch I moved. Typical of the father to a girl, I assumed.

“Oh, Colton, it is very nice to meet you finally. And you look so sharp!” Liz held my hand between both of hers, to appreciate the treasure of a man who could dress himself with some sense these days.

“Thank ya’, ma’am,” I blushed awkwardly. Compliments were never my strong suit.

“And Mr. Elliott, how are ya’ sir? Nice to see you.” I turned on the masculine shake when approaching her dad. My own father engrained the importance of a firm grip greeting as soon as I could talk.

“Enough with the formal stuff, Colton. Call me Tony. Although, I can admire the respect you have for your elders. To be honest, I didn’t expect such from a guy who beats people up for a living.”

Happy to shatter your stereotypical idea of me, man. But, I’d still break the nose of any fucker in this entire place who breathed the wrong way.

“Don’t let the scarred knuckles fool ya’, sir. I’m not a complete wild animal,” I tried to joke.

We sat, waiting to order, each scanning over the menu in tongue-tied silence before Liz finally broke the plain. “So, did Liv ever catch you in this big scheme, Colton? Does she know we’re here yet?”

“Actually, she’s completely clueless. Or, just letting on to be. But, she seems to be in the dark still. Ain’t real sure how I pulled it off, honestly. She usually reads me like a damn book.” I huffed with a scratchy laugh, quickly scolding myself internally for slipping a swear word.

“And this fight? Was it your idea? I mean, did you want her to get involved with it like you are?” Tony folded his menu, assumingly decided on his dinner choice, and focused he folded hands towards me. His tenor seemed almost snarky, but I was sure he hadn’t meant it that way, remembering Liv say he seemed somewhat excited over the idea.

“Actually, I hated the thought from the get-go. I lost my mind just when I thought it was all for fun. I begged her not to take it. But, you know 2-1 as well as I do. She shut me up real quick.”

“2-1?” Her mother cocked a confused smile of question.

“Oh, uhhh.. yeah. It’s just a little nickname I call her. She wears this old ratty hoodie around all the time with the number on the back. So, the name just kinda stuck.” I scratched my head before taking a generous gulp of water to lower the temperature of my smothering, sweating armpits.

“She talks about ball then? I mean, you’ve heard some about her days as a Warrior?” Tony interjected with round eyes.

“Definitely. I know it all, Mr. Elli… uh, Tony. We play sometimes on Sundays at this park down from our house. She kills me by 15+ every time.”

He smiled bittersweetly at the idea of his all-star with a ball in her hands again. And I, wanted to hit him for being so blind to the fact that she had so many other talents to be proud of, if he would just live in the now and see it.

Between our main course, and the dessert I ordered after listening to Liz read over the description in the menu more than three times, her dad brought up the inevitable. The “thing I wanted to talk to them about.”

“Okay, Colton. Now that you’ve treated us to that perfectly cooked slab of red meat, what did you want to talk with us about? Something to do with this fight, I’m sure.”

I swished another drink of water, although it was missing the bite of bourbon that I needed so fucking badly.

“Yeah, you could say that, I guess…” I answered him vaguely.

“Everything is okay though? You’re not worried for her anything, are you?” Elizabeth chimed in, sweeping a hair behind her ear, just the way Liv does.

“I’m worried for her, only because I love her. And when you walk up those steel steps, you’re takin’ a risk no matter who you are. But your daughter, she can hold her own. I see that now.” I reiterated to myself as much as her parents sitting across from me.

Tony and Liz looked away from me, now towards each other in both confusion and concern at my lack of response to the burning question of the entire damn night.

Being the coward I fucking am, and my very typical struggle for the right words, I did the only thing I knew to do that would clear the air, and satisfy their curiosity. I wriggled around in my seat, trying to loosen the opening of my pocket so I could reach in for the tiny, purple velvet box that had been burning a hole there since I left the house a couple of hours ago.

I neatly and gently placed it closer their side of the perfectly set table, and then looked down to fidget with my fingers. 

Her mom, the feminine instinct in her realizing immediately what was inside, reached for the box first, eagerly. A hand covered her opened jaw once she caught site of the custom cut, octagon shaped diamond, seated inside a silver band. The price was kept inside the secret space of a lock box I kept at the top of the closet, way beyond my housemates reach, to remind myself of the success that had allowed me to purchase something so extravagant, still not living up to what Liv really deserved. The jeweler laughed at the bizarre suggestion I had for an octagon shaped engagement diamond, but there was no convincing me into anything else. The cage was the very reason our relationship even began. Well, that along The Grind. And Drew and I had plans for that later. 

“Colton, speak up, son.” Tony leaned over to witness what had so thoughtfully touched his wife in the square shaped box. I couldn’t read his reaction, which sent my nerves straight to shit.

“Tony, I adore your daughter. That goes without sayin’….” I pasued, planning out every word in my head before I said it out loud. “I hurt her awhile back, something I still beat myself up over, and I never, ever want to see her cry like that again. I have issues of my own with anger, and I throw tantrums sometimes, but Livvy is my calm, ya’ know? She’s made me into this man who actually feels more than hate… and…. resentment. I would walk in front of a train for her, if it came to that.”

They sat very still in their seats, Liz wiping a tear here and there with the corner of her black cloth napkin, and Tony only furrowed his forehead, paying close attention to my professions.

“I didn’t know people were actually capable a’ lovin’ somebody else like this, but as soon as I think I love Livvy as much as anybody possibly could, she goes and proves my ass wrong.”

Strike two for sayin’ ass, Ritter. Liv’s gonna wash your mouth out with soap.

“I’m askin’ kindly, for a blessing from the two of you to ask Liv to marry me. It would mean a great deal to me, and I value the opinions of you both. But, if you can’t give it to me, I apologize, but I’m going to spend the rest of my life with your beautiful daughter no matter what. If she’ll have me.” I finished.

I had enough of my pop in me to know that asking for approval of the father was the right thing to do. But I had just enough thick-headed asshole in me, that I had decided on kneeling for Liv’s hand regardless of their approval. When your life once was a pathetic waste, and your mind is a dingy, manic hole like mine, you cling to any light like a fuckin’ firefly to flame. Liv was my chance, my reason. She was my light, and addiction.

“I think I can speak for Lizzie here too, when I say the respect you’ve shown us by asking, speaks a lot about your character. But Colton, this all seems a bit… rushed? I mean, it wasn’t long ago she was sitting in our dining room, explaining to us she had to flee the city for a week just to try and get some peace of mind after the way you hurt her. Now, the two of you are living together, and thinking about marriage?” Tony said.

“You’re exactly right. And, if Liv tells me she isn’t ready, then I’ll learn some patience and wait ‘til she is. But, as much as you love Mrs. Elliott here, I’m sure you’re familiar with the saying ‘when you know, you know’….”

I knew I was going to be pining for the girl the second I laid eyes on her static striken, matted hait that morning at the coffee shop. And I knew it again, the minute she walked out of Mac’s gym that night. As soon as the lingering of her sweet perfume had dissipated from that hallway, I felt my heart harden like cement.  

“Tony, you know was well as I do that Liv would want this. She loves him. Any time the sting from a breakup is as deep as she said it was, it’s meant to be.” I smiled to her mom for supporting the decision that her stern husband was still wrestling with.

There was silence while Liz devoured the chocolate desert the waiter had brought, offering me a taste, and once the check was delivered to me, an answer from the pair was still unknown.

“If ya’ want, you guys think it over. I know it’s a hefty decision,” I reasoned levelheaded.

“No need, Colton. My Livvy would never forgive me if she knew I didn’t give you my blessing.. If she loves you, and wants a life with you, well….then welcome to the family, boy.” Tony smiled, sliding the ring back, and I stood following his lead, to hug them both.

The most perfect, gorgeous, fuckin’ green eyed, smiley woman on this God forsaken earth, was going to share my last name. 

tags: @torialeysha @eap1935 @littleluna98 @mollybegger-blog

#Tom Hardy #tomhardy #tom hardy fanfiction #tommy conlon #tomhardyfanfic #tomhardyfanfiction #elizabeth olsen #thegrind

[songbird567]

Calamari Calories

Tentacles and fats. Buckle up kiddos

——

Velvet slept soundly in her bed, the huntress in training tired form a long day of training. A soft smile graced her face as she had dreams of baking carrot cake with her friends.

Though these peaceful dreams would soon be replaced by a nightmare as unbeknownst to the sleeping Faunus but something slowly slithered towards her. A black tentacle inched across the floor and slowly onto the bed.

The bedspring creaked and the tentacle twitched back as one of Velvet’s ears shot up. Once the appendage lowered the tentacle went back to sliding up the length of Velvet’s body. Within an instant it wrapped around her mouth.

Velvet’s eyes shot open as the cold and clammy tentacle kept her from screaming. Out of the darkness four more tentacles grabbed her by the wrist and ankles before pulling her into the bathroom. The door closed quietly as to not disturb the girl’s sleeping teammate.

Velvet kicked and struggled as best she could but she was held tight by the tentacles. Her eyes grew wide with terror as a much larger sixth tentacle appeared from nowhere and slipped into her shorts.

“N-no!” She gasped as the tentacle around her mouth removed itself. Velvet however could say no more as the tentacle insanely stuffed itself into her mouth. “Mmmf!” Velvet let out a muffled noise before something began to fill her mouth.

Velvet tried to spit the liquid out before suddenly realizing something. ‘It’s...cream?’ She thought curiously as more was pumped into her mouth, forcing her to swallow.

With each gulp velvet began to feel fuzzy. Her eyes felt heavy and her muscles relaxed. Despite this she kept gulping down the delicious cream which caused her flat stomach to bulge outward into a soft orb of fat. “Mmm~” she moaned softly and closed her eyes as more creak flooded her mouth, each gulp adding more pudge to her form.

Velvet let out a squeak and twitched as her shorts were ripped off her to reveal her panties. Her cheeks lit up with a blush but she lacked the strength to do anything and only focused on gulping down more cream. ‘It’s so good...I really want more’ She thought as the cream did its affect.

Velvet grew submissive and fatter as she was fed more cream. Her belly dropped lower and lower as her butt grew thicker behind her. Thighs slowly began to touch and rub together with the larger tentacle squeezed between them. Whenever Velvet weekly tugged with her arms, soft speedbag fat would wobble and sway gently. Her bra felt tight as her breasts expanded a few cup sizes until finally popping off, falling slowly to the floor.

‘This is getting a little out of control...I need to do something but I don’t have the strength.’ Velvet thought to herself before suddenly her eyes shot wide open.

With the victim being deemed fat enough the large tentacle shot deep without Velvet, forcing past her lips and reaching deep into her womanhood.

“Mmmmmmmfffffff!” Velvet shrieked at the sudden invasion of her privates. Her legs kicked and spasmed as the thick tendril pistoned in and out of her like a jackhammer as the bathroom became filled with the sound of wet slapping. ‘It’s too big...’ velvet thought and whimpered as her walls were spread further than nature intended as her womb was assaulted by the invasive tentacle.

The four tentacles holding her gripped tighter as the tentacle in Velvet’s math hastened it’s flow of cream. Velvet felt herself grow calm once more as the natural chemicals in the cream calmed and pacified the victim. Velvet’s body continued to grow fatter as she helplessly gulped the cream down.

Velvet blushed as she saw a tentacle jam itself into her belly button, thrusting in and out which caused the blubbery mass to jiggle and wobble. ‘This is embarrassing...a-ah hey no not back there!’ Velvet exclaimed to herself as she felt a cold, unseen object like one of her flabby butt cheeks. Her unheard comment went just that as the tentacle slipped between her cheeks and wiggled around before slowly pressing inside her.

Velvet whimpered as the tentacle slowly inched within her backside, stretching it while delving deeper in. Her attention was drawn away from that by the powerful thrusts into her womanhood only to be brought back to her backside as the tentacle began to pump cream into her.

Velvet watched as her body grew bigger by the second. ‘Oh no no no...this isn’t enough for it?’ Velvet thought as she felt the lower roll of her belly touch the cold tile floor. Her butt bulged outward and spread wider, now perfectly capable of filling a two person couch. Her breast swelled to the size of basketballs and swayed as she was held in the air. ‘I’m getting really full too...’ Velvet thought as the tentacles continued to pump more and more cream into her mouth and butt. ‘That’s enough!’

To the obese girl’s surprise the tentacles stopped. They slowly retraced from Velvet and seemed to hold themselves in the air, almost as if waiting.

“Uuuuurp...oof Thank you. Now put me down.” Velvet said as the tentacles did just that. “A-ah cold!” She squeaked as her blubbery butt touched the floor. It was then she felt something draped over her shoulder...a towel? “Hey what’s going on here?” She asked and raised an eyebrow.

The tentacles waited in the air, a few nuzzling against Velvet’s belly. “So you’re actually listening...that’s nice at least. Though that doesn’t change the fact you dragged me out of bed, fattened me up, and...did things with my butt. You should feel ashamed!”

The tentacles drooped down, looking upset as they were scolded by velvet who huffed and puffed her chubby cheeks.

“Now then...roll me over and finish.” Velvet said and blushed. “You got me...started. Then my heat is coming soon...so yes finish me up. No mouth or butt though I mean it!”

——

“Unnf ok...just like that. Yes keep going...” Velvet moaned and bit her lip as she stared down at her own bouncing breast as her womanhood was being filled with a large tentacle. Her belly provided a soft place to rest as her butt jiggled and wobbled in the air. She hated to admit it but she was being overwhelmed with pleasure. She failed to realize it at first but the tentacles were actually very pleasurable. Reaching deep within her, hitting her most sensitive parts, and keeping a strong and steady pace.

The tentacle began to piston faster and faster. Velvet moaned loudly as her womanhood twitched and quivered as the pleasure grew stronger and stronger. She felt her climax approach and cried out in ecstasy. Her walls squeezed the tentacle which began to pulse and throb. “H-hey wait maybe pull out oooh dust!” Velvet gasped as the tentacle pressed as deep into her as it could before hitting IT’S climax.

Like a flood, no a tsunami, the tentacle released within Velvet. Her belly swelled instantly, raising her higher off the floor. Velvet’s stomach grew round and taught as it was filled by the creature. “Y-you...uuugh...” velvet tried to scold the tentacle and demand it stop but her words were lost to her. The pleasure was too good and she felt her scowl twist into a pleasure filled smile as she climaxed again, the flood finally stopping, and finally leaving Velvet exhausted and stuffed to the brim.

“Ok...that’s enough for now...” velvet murmured before her eyelids grew too heavy and she fell asleep.

——

It’s been awhile since I wrote tentacles so this is probably trash. Its also kinda half assed. Also feel like trash for writing that first part. I am the big sad but I hope you enjoyed.