#mike wheeler i feel you | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mikesbasementbeets · 10 months

Text

ok. look at these.

look. that's the same look. right?

let's take a closer look. to do that, i'm gonna have to zoom in a bit on the first one. because, as you can immediately see, the shots are slightly different. the first is a little farther away, showing both mike and el, walking next to each other, whereas the second is much more intimate, a closeup on mike's expression as he looks at will's face in the foreground. a minor but telling difference about the levels of emotional intimacy in each scene.

so, moving past that first element of contrast, let's look at each shot in full, because in both of these scenes, mike goes on a bit of a face journey before he gets to that final smiling expression, seen above.

personally, i think studying actors' body language and micro-expressions is inconclusive at best, but i won't deny that these look similar. however, it's pretty clear to me that they aren't the same.

toward el, i see confusion, intrigue, maybe pleasant surprise, followed by a glance down (to emotionally process and/or watch his step), and then a nervous but friendly smile.

toward will, i see awe, relief, and overwhelming affection, followed by a shy glance down and a slight schooling of his slack jawed expression into a warm smile.

but, again, that's just my interpretation, and i can't say with any certainty what the intention of all of finn's micro-expressions are. but from my perspective, even a surface level viewing of these two expressions depicts a very different emotional experience. however: there's no denying the connection between these two scenes. they clearly mirror each other, just like a lot of things about mike's relationships with el and will mirror each other. i don't think that's an accident.

whatever you think his sexuality is, mike is undeniably in a romantic narrative with el. beginning in season one episode three, when the concept of their romantic relationship is introduced, the narrative arc mike and el share is heavily focused on that relationship. the first scene above actually happens in that same episode (s1e3), not coincidentally almost directly afterward. and the former scene, with mike, lucas, and dustin behind the baseball field, provides very interesting context for several reasons:

first: bear with me, because we're going back to look at the context behind this context. this is only episode three of the show, but already there's a lot going on, both in text and subtext.

and since we have the entirety of their relationship so far presented to us on screen, when lucas accuses mike of looking at el romantically, we're easily able to go back and figure out where he got that impression: we can examine every time lucas has seen mike look at el at all.

the first night, after finding el in the woods instead of will, and while insisting that the next day she'd be gone and they could focus on will again, mike's behavior is directly reminiscent of benny's. taking el in, and providing her with shelter, food, and clothing.

the next day, after learning that she's in danger and changing his mind about pawning her off on his mother, mike infers that she might know something about will. when lucas arrives, he exclaims that she recognized him and knew he was missing.

later, when lucas tells her that will is their friend, she asks what that means and mike explains. a friend...

and then she displays that she might really be able to help them find will. and mike looks at her like this:

each and every one of these interactions is directly related to will. but lucas, through the omnipresent lens of heteronormativity that surrounds boys' interactions with girls (especially a group of boys who have no experience with girls... more on that in a bit), only seems to consider the fact that mike's behavior, which is undeniably about will, is being directed at el.

throughout season one (and beyond, in more subtle ways), will and el are repeatedly connected to each other through the trope of mistaken identity. will is abducted on the same night (and due to the same series of events) that el escapes the lab. hopper, in his investigation into will's disappearance, keeps running into clues about el. and mike, lucas, and dustin, sneaking out in episode one to search for will, find el instead.

later in the season, hopper eventually realizes the truth of his own more overt mistaken identity arc: while he was under the assumption that he'd been following will's trail, he'd actually been following el's. interestingly, the realization is triggered by one specific distinguishing difference, which tells him beyond a doubt that he's been looking for two different kids: their art.

though much more subtle (aka hidden in the subtext), mike's arc with his feelings about will and el follows a very similar pattern. the main difference, though, is that in season one, the swapping of places is eventually reversed but never acknowledged as such, and mike ends season one with el now missing and will back in his life, but a lingering sense of something yet unresolved.

second: (i'm not going to deep dive into this one here, because it's a whole analysis in and of itself, but i need to mention it because it is relevant) this scene introduces the recurring motif of superheroes being directly connected to mike's feelings for el, which is an association we see follow them all the way into season four and become a defining metaphor for their incompatibility.

third: lucas is the character who first introduces mike's romantic feelings for el into the narrative. and instead of giving any indication that lucas' interpretation is correct, mike's reaction is... difficult to read. his response is immediately defensive, both verbally ("what are you talking about?" "shut up, lucas,") and physically (leaning away and shielding himself when lucas hugs him). we can infer from the original character descriptions why mike might be defensive about this subject:

obviously, this description is only a vague impression of what Mike Wheeler became, but it's clear that the core elements of his character outlined here did come to fruition on screen. here, mike's insecurity is linked both to the bullying he undergoes, and to his inexperience/ineptitude with girls. and it's presented as key to his character motivation (the original concept of his character arc put forth here is very straightforward: at the start, mike has insecurity centered around bullying and is romantically inexperienced. by the end, mike has courage against monsters and romantic experience.)

in any case, this scene is the first hint of this aspect of mike's character in the show itself (the earlier scene of bullying in the show focusing on mike consoling dustin over what he’s being bullied for (“i think it's kinda cool. it’s like you have superpowers or something!”)... see my last point here… mike holds the idea of superpowers in high regard, and they are consistently connected with his feelings about el. something about the mistaken identity through-line feels apt here: mike mistakes his feelings of admiration for el as feelings of romance.) in this scene, mike is confronted with both romance (in direct relation to himself for the first time in the show) and bullying.

but due to the way this is shot, it's impossible to get a read on what mike is truly feeling. it reminds me a lot of another scene, actually...

in both of these scenes, mike's genuine emotional reaction is hidden from us. in the first, lucas forcibly hugs him, teasing him about how much he "loves" el, and in effect introducing the idea of el as a romantic prospect to mike. in the second, el hugs mike tightly, her hand still around his neck from their kiss and his arm trapped in between them, similar to the way he shields himself from lucas. we're then shown that he's signed the card on the flowers squished between them "from, mike." hm. so... not love, as lucas suggests.

we come to learn over the course of season four that this is something mike is actively struggling with: his inability to "love" el in the way that she wants, expects, and deserves. this scene, introducing that season-long arc, conceals mike's true emotional state and motivations from us, again, mirroring the first introduction to their entire romantic plot line way back in season one.

(an aside: lucas' "if you love her so much, [then] why don't you marry her?" aka the inciting event of their romantic arc, is a based on a conditional statement with the hypothesis that mike loves el. as mr. clarke might posit (in, say, season one, episode one): what's the difference between an experiment and other forms of science investigation? ...well, an experiment is a controlled test of two or more variables against a hypothesis. does that remind you of anything happening in mike's romantic narrative? something about...... [murray voice] experimenting sexually?)

anyway. then, after extracting himself from el's embrace, mike finally drops his bag(gage) and opens his now empty arms to will, before preemptively cutting himself short with a punch to the shoulder.

...did someone say internalized homophobia?

and then immediately upon being introduced to argyle, mike is called out for his presentation here not being genuine. ("it's a shitty knock-off,"/"i really thought it was ocean pacific...") we're being told that something about mike's performance is not what it seems (and may even be a case of one thing being mistaken for something else).

and speaking of homophobia...

fourth (and finally): this scene, of lucas' teasing mike about his "love" for el, which i'll remind you again is tied directly to lucas mistaking mike's behavior regarding will as being solely about el, is quickly interrupted by an onslaught of homophobia, during which mike is specifically targeted (read: tripped) by the bullies.

the juxtaposition is immediate and obvious: mike's friends lovingly teasing him, even embracing him, over a crush on a girl vs. bullies maliciously taunting them about will being killed for being queer and then physically harming mike.

(there's also something to be said about the later scene in which these bullies force mike to drop his bike in the woods and chase him to the edge of the quarry, mirroring exactly how the cops assume will must have died... and, to be clear, i'm not saying that mike himself is being bullied for being queer in the way will was. no, mike's queerness is invisible to those around him in a way that will's isn't, so his relationship with it and the ways it affects him are hidden in subtext.)

which brings us directly to the following scene in the woods. el asks about mike's injury (sustained from the aforementioned bullying, thereby linking these two scenes even more concretely) and with a little prodding ("friends don't lie"), he opens up to her about what happened, and about being bullied at school. she listens, tells him she understands (this also follows her recent flashback of brenner's abuse in the lab), and they share a "cool," "cool," and a smile.

so... let's quickly jump over from here to the van scene with will. something similar, yet notably different, is happening in this scene, leading up to that infamous smile at the end. mike is sharing his insecurities with will now, but instead of will prodding him to open up, mike, prompted only by will's "she's gonna be okay," begins rambling so much about his insecurities (while speaking in superhero metaphors) that he eventually cuts himself off, saying it's "stupid." instead of letting him brush it off, will guesses exactly what mike is afraid of: "you're scared of losing her." he gives him The Painting (a symbol of his love for mike) and a long speech about feeling lost and different, while insisting upon mike's value (you're the heart, leading us, inspiring us, etc). and then they share a "yeah?" "yeah," and a smile.

so we can see the similarity in the way the shots are set up, the progression of the conversations, and mike's visible reactions. but we can also see distinct differences, all of which together inform a significant difference in emotional weight between these two scenes.

while mike's conversation in the woods with el takes place in the third episode of season one, at which point mike has known her for less than 48 hours, the van scene is in the second to last episode of season four, and is the fourth of five heart-to-hearts mike and will have this season alone (and following three previous seasons and beyond that years of close friendship). it is also arguably the climax of their shared arc this season. on the other hand, mike and el's season one moment is part of the introduction to their storyline, and the introduction to their romantic arc. in this moment in the woods, mike is looking at el romantically (did you think i was gonna argue that he isn't? because no, he definitely is). in fact, this is the beginning of mike's entire romantic arc, which sets out to address the foundational insecurity that is key to his character. we, as an audience, right alongside mike, have just been told (by lucas) that mike has romantic feelings for el. and then we are presented with this scene. we are supposed to view this as romantic. because mike is starting to view it as romantic.

had stranger things been one season long, then the climax of their romantic arc would have been the kiss they share in the cafeteria, followed by the denouement of el's symbolic death (the gay implications of which i could write another whole essay on...). but the end of season one was not the resolution of mike's full romantic arc. by the nature of the five act structure (which is what stranger things has, being five seasons), the entirety of season one serves as exposition for our full narrative. which means, in effect, that the entire arc of mike and el's season one relationship is there to serve as groundwork, a foundation for mike's complete five season arc. season one, starting from before he even meets el, all the way through to when he eventually kisses her and then loses her, is only act one of that arc. the first act of five act structure is when the driving conflict is presented. so in the context of the entire show, for us as the viewer, mike's narrative arc surrounding the romantic aspect of his insecurity begins with his season one "romance" with el.

and we know that this insecurity is an element of the full five-act narrative, rather than being presented and wrapped in the course of the mini "self contained" narrative of season one, because we can see plainly, three seasons later, particularly during mike's heart-to-hearts with will, that this insecurity has not yet been resolved. we know this, on a basic level, from having watched mike and el's relationship struggles progress, but it is still explicitly laid out for us in season four. and will is consistently the only person who genuinely hears mike out, encourages him to open up, and addresses his insecurities, instead of brushing him off, like most other people in his life (including will at some points) have done. will understands him in a way el only claimed to in season one.

looking back to the character outline: mike has now "kiss[ed] a girl" and even "had a girlfriend" and still hasn't resolved his insecurities even remotely. in fact, after the first season arc wraps up, this romantic relationship becomes the main source of that insecurity. his difficulty navigating a real romantic relationship with el is the basis of their arc in season three. and by season four, mike is consciously struggling with being unable to tell el that he loves her. despite will's reassurances that things will be okay (which stack onto lucas' constant relationship advice in season three), mike keeps circling back around to it. because he can't move forward on the path he is on.

he has reached a point of no return, like a “fight you can’t come back from.” he is unable to find the security he is searching for in his romantic relationship with el... and this is where we arrive back at the van scene with will.

if the scene in the woods marks the beginning of the introduction of mike's romantic arc, then the scene in the van marks the beginning of the conclusion of mike's romantic arc. if the introduction of his romantic arc (season one) presents his insecurity, then the natural conclusion of that arc (season five) is security. throughout season four, mike lays out for will the insecurity that his relationship with el still brings him. he is unable to find that security with el, and, in the van scene, finds it with will instead.

or, should i say, begins the journey to finding it. because, especially after the lie that brings them into that moment, and then traumatic pizza dough freezer incident, we're still at the beginning of the conclusion. there's still a lot to resolve, but season four (alongside mike, who now understands what he's been going through) finally began moving the subtext of mike's arc into the actual text. and this moment indicates that season five will take that next step to fully, textually, actualizing it.

so, getting back to the parallel we're looking at here: each of these scenes is a catalyzing moment in mike's romantic arc. in season one, when lucas suggests that mike has a crush on el, and then what follows is a conversation with el where she is (to quote lucas) "not grossed out" by him, he actively begins his journey toward resolving this character motivating insecurity. he looks at el and he sees the possibility of romance.

and just look at him. he looks excited. hopeful. a little nervous. but... i want to remind you again: mike has known el for less than 48 hours at this point. this is the first conversation they've had in which they've related to each other as equals. for their entire relationship before this and afterward, outside of their romantic interactions (and also. often. disturbingly. concurrent with their romantic interactions...), mike's role has been as el's protector, a makeshift father figure, the elliot to her E.T. here, though, el tells mike that she understands him.

in season one, mike is twelve years old (read: pre-pubescent). he has no personal understanding of or experience with romance. dustin starts to comment in s1e2, "you're letting a girl...?" and ted later scoffs "our son with a girl?" and outside of the queer coding, what we can take from both of these (which draw back to the original character description) is that mike has no experience with girls whatsoever. (outside of, you know. family. but that's not what this post is about.)

and again, this scene happens almost directly after lucas first introduces the idea of romance between them, both to the narrative, and to mike himself, who, very significantly, up until this point, has shown no romantic interest in el. the sequence of these events is not a coincidence. 1. lucas assumes mike has romantic feelings for el. 2. el and mike have a moment of personal connection and understanding 3. mike "boys only" wheeler puts these two together and assumes the connection between them must be romance. but the expression on mike's face here isn't a representation of already existing romantic feelings. there's no basis for those. again, this moment represents for mike the potential for romance.

which... makes his expression in the van scene hit even harder. because unlike el, will isn't a stranger he barely knows, but rather his best friend of ten years. and it isn't lucas telling mike how mike feels. it's will professing his own feelings about mike, in direct response to mike's self-professed insecurities. (ding ding ding, are your alarm bells going off?) mike's expression at the end of this scene, if we're viewing it as a reprise of his season one expression, is a representation of hope for his romantic future. but this time, heading into the resolution of mike's romantic arc, with all of the knowledge and context we (and mike) have gained over the course of the past four seasons, it's directed at will.

ok. so. with the basic connection between these two scenes established, i'm gonna move a little bit sideways here. at the end of their romantic arc in season one, el disappears from mike's life and will reappears in it, effectively swapping their places (remember that we've been dealing with the mistaken identity trope between these two), and leaving the question of mike's romantic security glaringly unresolved.

and we know why - this is a five act narrative we're watching - but just within the context of the season one arc... the climactic moment of mike finally asking the girl to be his sister kissing the girl was preceded by her locating will in the upside down (leading to his rescue) and followed by a resolution in which she disappeared... and will took her place. at the end of the season, mike is left in the same place he started: playing games in his basement with will, his first attempt to resolve his arc of romantic insecurity, with el, ultimately ending in tragedy.

after season one, this arc picks up again, but this time will is the one present in mike's life. and mike's behaviors toward el in season one, during which they were undergoing a romantic story arc, begin showing up again in his behavior toward will. but unlike with el, mike's particular (read: romantic) behavior toward will happens without outside intervention, and in fact, often in spite of outside intervention. now, this isn't to say that all of mike's behavior with el was a result of others' influence. when el reveals to mike that she is on the run from "bad people," mike is immediately protective and caring toward her. however, as i've already explained, this caring behavior (which, again, we know right off the bat is not romantic because it directly mirrors the way both benny and hopper care for her) doesn't turn into romantic behavior until lucas introduces that idea.

on the opposite side of the spectrum, right from episode one of season one, mike's behavior toward will is fully self motivated, even in the face of opposition.

and as we move through season one and beyond, we can see that mike continues to rely on constant guidance in the way he cares about el (particularly and most consistently from lucas).

stranger things is, at it's horror filled core, a coming of age tale. like many of our other characters, mike's full character arc, romantic and otherwise, is about self-actualization. from the very conception of the show, his insecurity is presented as a central character flaw to overcome, while also being directly linked with his romantic fulfillment. the overcoming of this fatal flaw, the resolution of his romantic arc, and his final achievement of self-actualization are all inextricably intertwined.

the reprisal of this specific expression of romantic hope as we enter the end of mike's romantic arc is not an indication that mike is in the same place emotionally at the end of season four as he was at the beginning of season one, just with a different person now. instead, it is an indication of his romantic arc coming full circle. mike began in a position of hope for his romantic future with el, only to have the actualization of that hope (their romantic relationship) gradually degrade his romantic fulfillment and self-esteem. the longer mike and el are together, and the more serious their romantic relationship becomes, the worse mike's insecurities become. this is, i would argue, directly related to the fact that mike's pursuit of a romantic relationship with el is not due to his own genuine desire, but instead a combined result of heteronormativity (lucas assuming mike's feelings for el to be romantic), compulsive heterosexuality (mike's subsequent assumption that his feelings for el must be romantic), forced conformity (mike's attempt to resolve his insecurities firmly within these heteronormative boundaries, under the assumption that a rejection of these boundaries is unacceptable), and the trope of mistaken identity that has been following will and el since season one.

and of course i don't know with any concrete certainty what season five will contain, but based on the narrative so far, and optimistically expecting a satisfying resolution to his character arc, the actualization of his romantic hope regarding will is going to lead to true romantic fulfillment and coincide with his self-actualization (a big part of which is coming to terms with his sexuality).

now, i'm not going to conclude this whole analysis by saying, "and that's why mike is gay!" because while i think this all is a good indication of that, based on all of the context and my impression that this narrative is being presented in a way that focuses on the subtext and deeper symbolism of each of these relationships rather than being a case of specifically el vs. will, you might still have a different interpretation than me. that's fine. however, i am going to end by insisting (me when i argue with the wall), based on everything i've laid out, that this parallel and others like it (ie parallels between byler & miIeven's romantic arcs) are not evidence of mike's feelings, specifically whether they are genuinely romantic or not. this parallel serves as a narrative device in his romantic character arc... the conclusion of which is mike realizing and coming to terms with the fact that he is actually in love with will, and not el.

just to be very clear, i'm not saying these parallels alone are proof against mike being bisexual, but i am saying that they are not evidence in support of his being bisexual. again: they do not indicate that mike is romantically attracted to el. what they indicate is that will and el are foils in mike's romantic arc.

before i finish, i want to address a couple misconceptions:

1. the fact that mike actively and willingly participates in a romantic relationship with a woman means he can’t be gay. this is straight up homophobia. gold star bullshit. no.

2. mike and el being presented in a romantic light means that they have genuine romantic feelings for each other. this is a misconception of the way narrative tools are used to tell a story. going right back to my first point: it is an irrefutable fact that many gay people have romantic relationships with the people of different genders (read “the opposite sex”) before they come out/realize their true sexuality. it is also a fact that many of these gay people fully believe their feelings to be genuinely romantic before realizing that they are not. as i've already gone over, mike is twelve years old when his romantic arc begins. on the surface, his relationship with el is presented as romantic. he participates in (and even initiates) romantic behaviors because he believes that his feelings for el are romantic. in seasons one and two, mike is one of our main POV characters. we can see a romantic tilt to the way some of their scenes are shot because, to mike, while they are happening, they are romantic (keeping in mind what i said before about mike having no experience and therefore no personal knowledge informing his perspective, AND keeping in mind that many of these on-the-surface "romantic" scenes are also consistently subtextually linked (read: paralleled) to familial relationships for both of them... and i haven't even touched the cultural context surrounding homosexuality in 80's. there's so much nuance informing the way this story is being told). and we, as the audience, are supposed to read them as romantic on first viewing, because otherwise the season five plot twist, revealing the truth of mike's feelings, would not work.

it is not a coincidence that the active degradation of their romantic relationship (outside of all of the other context, parallels, symbolism, family coding, etc, that are there to hint along the way that things are not as they might seem) begins full force in season three, at the exact point when the two actually enter a real relationship for the first time, and also when our characters are entering puberty, the time during which a person's sexuality (in a general sense, but also in regard to sexual orientation) begins to fully emerge. after his season one arc with el, mike underwent another season-long romantic arc: this time, with will. it's more subtle, because (i believe) mike doesn't realize yet that it's romantic, but it's there. then at the end of season two, mike makes a choice: he encourages will to dance with a girl and he dances with el, re-writing their tragic ending from season one, but now leaving his romantic arc with will frustratingly unresolved, again mirroring the sense of unresolution from season one: mike has swapped out the end of each romantic arc with the wrong love interest.

and then in season three, now having had the experience of both romantic arcs, and now, for the first time, with both will and el right there beside him, all we can see anymore is the overt contrast between the two relationships, depicted most blatantly through the same type of visual and narrative "parallel" we've been looking at here.

but at the end of this season, instead of making a choice, mike's choice is made for him. he has a romantic moment with will, and then el kisses him, confusing the resolution of these two romantic arcs once again.

mike's season four arc closely mirrors his season one arc (searching for one love interest with the other by his side, mistaken identity trope abound), but with important distinctions: 1. mike is a little older, a lot more experienced, and has a better understanding of both the context of romantic relationships and the scope of his feelings for both el and will. and 2. mike's only real guidance in season four comes from will, and he doesn't simply listen and act based on will's advice, as he did with lucas' in seasons 1&3. now, he fully engages with will's input, pushing back against it when he doesn't agree, and accepting it when he can acknowledge its truth (up until, of course, our fourth (and hopefully final) tragic, incorrectly resolved ending). mike is finally taking control of his romantic narrative in a way he hasn't previously, and the direction it's heading in now is toward security, self-actualization, and will.

so the point of all of this is: nothing is as simple or straightforward as it may seem on the surface. the narrative has always been deeply complex and layered with subtext and symbolism. and most of all, when interpreting the meaning of anything presented directly to us on screen, context matters.

also uh. yeah, mike gay

#byler #mikesbasementbeets posts #parallels are there to be noticed. but that should be where the analysis begins. not where it ends.#this got kinda long i just wanted to be really thorough bc this kind of 'parallel = 1:1 similarity' thinking is way too prevalent #this is less an analysis and more me explaining the plot of the show but. sometimes it feels like it needs to be explained lmao #yes i lied about the ending but when you eliminate the only claim negating that conclusion....#that's. i mean that's the conclusion.#(btw the difference between comparative and experimental investigations is that in an experiment one of the variables is fixed.#something to think about)#mike wheeler

774 notes · View notes

afewproblems · 7 months

Text

Season Two Halloween AU Part Five

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four

Synopsis: What if Eddie had been at Tina's Halloween Party in Season Two? Featuring Steve!Whump, Stancy Breakup, and Eddie just trying to keep up with all these new revelations about who King-Steve actually is...

Huge huge HUGE shout-out to Jess @strangersteddierthings for being my sounding board and letting me send such long messages full of spoilers!! I can't thank you enough!

***

“Dustin, what the hell are you doing here?” Steve says as he hurries towards the kid, he looks around as though expecting another person to follow behind him.

“I can’t find Nancy or Jonathan, you’re the only other one who knows about--”

The kid, Dustin, tilts himself to look past Steve at Eddie with suspicious eyes, “you know”.

Steve freezes, his shoulders a rigid line of tension as Dustin steps around him to head for the screen door.

Eddie had to give it to the kid, he certainly had guts just waltzing in here like this.

“You still have your bat?”

Steve looks from Dustin to Eddie and lowers his voice to mutter something that has Dustin shaking his head rapidly.

"The one with nails, Steve".

"Your what?" Eddie blurts out, forcing the other two to turn towards him. Dustin full on glares. His eyes narrow in irritation while Steve's face pales before smoothing out in that same guarded expression from earlier.

Dustin steps closer to Eddie and crosses his arms over his chest, "who are you?"

"Dustin--"

"That was a rule," Dustin cuts across Steve, smacking the back of one hand into the palm of the other, "no one else gets to know, and I can't tell Max, so you can't just tell him--"

Steve jerks his head as if slapped, a flush building on his cheeks and ears, "I haven't--Eddie's not, I don't--"

Dustin waves his hand dismissively and turns towards Eddie once again.

"Look, it's cool that Steve is expanding his social circle but you should leave".

The attitude on this kid.

Eddie holds out a hand at Dustin and laughs but it tumbles out with a tinge of hysteria, "I'm sorry, I'm still stuck on the whole Nail Bat thing?"

Steve groans, his head swings back and forth from Eddie to Dustin as though he's not sure who to answer first.

He sighs and runs one hand over his face, roughly from the slight wince he makes as he brushes the black eye, "look," Steve barks out, "he's a friend".

Something in Eddie's chest warms at the words despite the incredulous scoff that threatens to tumble out. Steve Harrington, friends with Eddie Munson?

Dustin snorts, "you don't have friends? I only ever see you with Nancy and Jonathan".

Steve flinches slightly at the words, but Dustin carries on talking, brushing past Steve to the house.

"We don't have time for this, I've been looking for you guys all day and now it's dark and there are lives at stake--"

"Je-sus, okay, okay," Steve takes three long strides to catch up to Dustin and steps in front of him, he reaches out for the kids shoulder but seems to think better of it and instead runs the hand through his hair.

"You said lives are at stake?"

It's like a switch is flipped in the kid, he whirls around on Steve, a stream of near gibberish falling out of his mouth at a mile a minute, Eddie can hardly follow it.

"And now he's this big," Dustin hisses, throwing his hands nearly two feet apart from one another.

Steve holds up his hands, "okay, Christ, how do you know it's not just a lizard, Dustin?"

"Because its face opened up and ate my cat, Steve".

Steve looks up at Eddie, meeting his gaze with a nervous laugh, "listen, Dustin, uh, he watches too many B-Monster movies, I'm just gonna take him back to his house".

Now Eddie wouldn't say he's necessarily a, 'go-with-the-flow' kind of guy, but he can roll with the punches --any Dungeon Master worth their salt needed to be able to think on their feet when the time came.

Which is probably why he opens his big fucking mouth.

"I mean, life and death situations with cat-eating Kobolds sounds exactly like my kind of night fellas".

Steve frowns and tilts his head, staring at Eddie while Dustin perks up, his eyes widen in surprise.

"Kobolds? You play D&D?" Dustin says skeptically, pushing past Steve to make his way up to Eddie now.

Eddie laughs at the question, "kid, I run the D&D club at Hawkins High".

Suddenly it's like there's a different kid standing in front of him, his face lights up in wonder and he opens his mouth to continue when Steve makes a sputtering noise behind him.

"Henderson," Steve bites out, hands on his hips, "I swear to God, if you interrupted us for some Halloween prank, you're dead".

He stands there for a moment scowling at the pair of them before turning on his heel and walking towards the house.

"It's not a prank," Dustin huffs defensively, his arms cross over his chest and his face scrunches into a frown.

He looks up at Eddie briefly, all good will from the D&D revelation earlier now forgotten as Dustin follows Steve's path towards the door.

Eddie sighs, he could just leave at this point. Either this is the most elaborate way someone has ended a smoke session with him, or the weirdest role playing game Eddie has ever found himself in the middle of.

But something about the fear in Dustin's voice has Eddie lingering beside the abandoned loungers. He bends down to pick up the forgotten joints and puts them back in his lunchbox before putting the lunchbox back in the backpack. No sense in letting some perfectly good jays go to waste.

The screen door slides open again revealing Steve, who blinks in surprise, "you stayed?"

Eddie shrugs, "I said I would, didn't I?"

Steve nods, and ducks his face, but he can't quite hide the smile that blooms, his eyes crinkle at the corners for the briefest moment before it falls.

"Listen, I know that it sounds like a load of shit--"

"Understatement," Eddie cuts in with a shake of his head.

"Yeah, but you need to know, if you come with us, you're in it. I'm not joking, this is your chance to just walk away".

It's almost as if Steve is pleading with him, and it's then that Eddie notices what Steve has gripped between his hands.

A fucking baseball ball bat, studded with nails that have been haphazardly hammered into the end of it.

Eddie looks from the bat, to Steve's face as Dustin steps out of the house now with two walkie talkies in his hand. He reaches for Steve's backpack and unzips it to place them inside before zipping it up again. There's a grim determination on both of their faces that Eddie has never seen on another person in real life and suddenly he's speaking without thinking again.

"Well, what are we waiting for?"

***

Eddie swipes a shaking hand through his sweat matted hair as he watches Steve and the rest of the party move about the Byers living room.

As though mere hours ago they didn’t just fend off a group of flower faced creatures hellbent on entering their fortified school bus to tear them apart.

It was crazy.

It was absolutely batshit that all this time there were creatures from another dimension running around their sleepy little backwoods town.

Eddie shudders at the memory of the sounds they made, the horrible grating wails like metal on metal, echoes in his mind.

And now…a person was dead. Mr. Newby.

Eddie had met him once while buying a used amp at the Radio Shack just a few months ago. He was nice, asked about the band and what instrument Eddie played. He had even offered to help Eddie get the amp out to his van.

And now, he was dead.

Mr. Newby would never take Joyce out for another date, he would never walk into his job and help take inventory, he would never offer a helping hand or piece of advice ever again.

Eddie can't help but think about how close they had all come to ending up like Bob, how one of these things had almost crawled into the bus.

What if they hadn't been called away? Bob had a gun and that hadn't been enough to stop the pack of creatures from…

Eddie looks to Steve.

Steve who hasn't stopped pacing the Byers living room since Hopper herded all of them into the house.

He takes five steps to the window at the front of the room, and five steps back to the door of the kitchen, again and again.

And suddenly, things make so much more sense.

The strange haunted expression on Steve's face Eddie would see between classes whenever he thought no one was looking.

The way the three of them, Jonathan, Nancy, and Steve never let the kids go anywhere without a ride.

The way Steve had looked at his empty pool yesterday.

Things happen in the dark, in the woods.

On the fifth pass, Eddie reaches out to Steve and catches the hand closest to him.

Whatever trance Steve was in dissipates, leaving him to blink once and look down at Eddie's hand before slowly curling his fingers more firmly around Eddie's and squeezing gently.

"How're you holding up?" Steve asks quietly as he drops Eddie's hand to pull a dining chair up to where Eddie is seated on a beaten up recliner.

Eddie scoffs at the question and shrugs, "when I figure that out, you'll be the first to know".

Steve nods, a small half smile climbs up his face.

It drops as he looks across the room at Will.

Jonathan kneels beside the couch, talking quietly to his brother, who stares blankly at the ceiling while Nancy watches on beside them.

Eddie's eyes follow Nancy's hands, the way she hesitates to touch Jonathan before eventually giving in and draping her hands over his shoulders.

He looks back at Steve who also seems to be watching Nancy. He breathes out a long sigh and shakes his head, before turning back to Eddie.

"If it makes you feel better, you're taking it better than I did the first time".

Eddie raises one skeptical eyebrow and smirks, "I highly doubt that--"

"I ran away," Steve cuts across him with wide eyes, "I almost left Nance and Jon with a monster, one of those things that took Will," he holds Eddie's gaze for another beat before dropping it to the floor.

"So, don't sell yourself short".

Eddie opens his mouth to tell Steve he should take his own advice but Hopper suddenly makes his presence known once more as he closes the door to Joyce's room behind him and walks back into the living room.

"Okay, we may not have backup on route for a few more hours--"

"If they're even coming," Mike scoffs from the corner, "who says they believed you anyway?"

"Listen, until we are told otherwise, we need to sit tight," Hopper barks, sending a glare Mike's way.

Hopper deflates slightly, as though realizing who he's talking to, and takes a deep steddying breath which he releases slowly through his nose, “we can't just charge in without backup--"

"If we sit here on our asses those things will eventually make it to town, you saw the tunnels Hop," Dustin bites out this time, shooting his own fierce glare at the chief as he stands beside Mike.

"They'll tear everything apart," Max says softly from the floor. She's settled against the back wall of the living room against the collage of drawings that Will had completed in his frenzied state, Lucas sits closer and takes her hand in his own.

"Oh no," Steve mutters under his breath, he spares Eddie a glance before standing up from the chair, "no, no, we can't fight these things by ourselves, we're outmatched here Henderson".

"Not if we know how they work," Mike insists. He walks towards where Max and Lucas are sitting, nearly stepping on the pair of them in his haste.

"Jesus Mike," Lucas hisses under his breath while Max settles for stomping her foot against Mike's own. He jumps at the sudden pain and the three of them dissolve into vicious bickering and name calling until Steve and Nancy pull the kids away from each other.

"Okay, just, keep going Mike," Nancy tells him, once everyone has settled down once more. She gestures to the drawings taped up around the room.

"As I was trying to say," Mike sneers at Max who scoffs and crosses her arms, "what if it's all connected, the tunnels, the dogs, Will?"

No one speaks, the words seem to hang in the air as all eyes move to the couch where Will lays wrapped in blankets and staring unseeing at the ceiling.

Mike continues, "this all started after that day in the field--"

"And if he was infected," Dustin interrupts with a gasp as Mike nods rapidly, pointing at him and then the drawings again.

"It's like a virus, connecting him to this, this--"

"Hivemind," Lucas supplies, his voice hollow as he stands up to join the rest of the kids, "like what Mr. Clarke told us".

"Okay, okay, slow down God Dammit," Hopper huffs as he lifts his hand to pinch his fingers into his eyes.

"Hivemind?" Steve says slowly, as though rolling the word around on his tongue, "like bees?"

Dustin blinks once, his face morphing in surprise, "kind of, it's like a superorganism made up of several others all working together, one collective consciousness".

"A Mindflayer," Eddie whispers, just loud enough for the kids to turn their heads towards him.

He's been quiet for so long, sitting on the sidelines of this group that had clearly worked together in a crisis before. It was almost like listening to Jeff, Gareth, and Grant in a Hellfire session, watching them work out a trap in real time before executing their plan.

It would be endearing if there weren't actual monsters running about.

"Holy shit," Mike breathes out while Dustin darts off towards the bookshelf in the corner.

He flips up some of the drawings until he finds what he's looking for and loudly crows, "yes!"

Dustin marches back to the kitchen table and slams the book down on the surface before flipping several pages. He slaps the back of his hand on the page in triumph as he sends Eddie a confident grin.

"This isn't a game kid," Hopper sighs but steps closer to look at the book nonetheless.

"But it's the closest metaphor we have," Dustin argues back.

"Analogy," Lucas says as he steps towards the table, a shit eating grin pulls at his mouth as he catches Dustin's eye.

"Fine, analogy, whatever!" Dustin mutters, a red flush climbs up his neck until it settles on his ears, he slaps his hand on the books again, "can I get on with it or do you have more vocab for me?"

"Dustin," Nancy sighs, reaching out for his shoulder with one hand, she gives it a slight shake, "what would this even tell us?"

"Well," Dustin turns to Nancy now and points at a section below a horrifying drawing of a humanoid man with a squid for a head. Four tentacles point in all directions while its hands wield a terrifying glowing orb.

It's not something that Eddie has thrown at his players in years now that he's managed to figure out how to balance his encounters properly.

Because Mindflayers…were horrific.

"They're basically from another dimension, and they travel to different worlds to conquer other species that they see as inferior to themselves".

"Conquer," Steve breathes out beside Eddie who can't help but shuffle closer to brush his shoulder against Steve's own.

Steve gives Eddie a brief smile before looking back to where Dustin and Hopper are arguing once again.

Eddie lets his gaze drift only to find Nancy staring at him curiously, her sharp blue eyes flit from Steve and back to himself, the weight of her gaze makes Eddie want to pull away from Steve but he holds his ground and stares right back.

Nancy offers him a tentative smile, which does nothing to ease the sudden tension in Eddie's chest, feeling as though he's been caught.

He could easily explain this away, despite the rumors running rampant at school about Eddie, there is no way anyone would believe the same would be true of Steve Harrington.

Eddie ignores the unhappy weight that settles in his stomach at the thought, he let himself get way too close, way too quickly.

Besides, there wasn’t a chance in hell that Steve was, that he could be…

Eddie shakes himself and moves away, lamenting the loss of Steve’s warm shoulder as he lets Hopper's voice pull him back to the matter at hand.

"Okay then," Hopper nods, looking around the room.

"How do we kill it?"

***

They have a plan.

Or at least, half of them do.

Going based off a thirteen year olds hypothesis that their friend is basically a spy for a creature from another dimension -which in hindsight is definitely not the craziest thing they’ve experienced today.

Is it something that Eddie would have never come up with in his wildest dreams? Undoubtedly.

But that was before a girl with literal mind-powers showed up and tossed a dead demodog through the Byers window.

Jesus Christ.

So, with El and Hopper on their way to the lab, the rest of the party busies themselves by packing the Byers Station Wagon for the drive to Hopper's cabin.

They have to flush this thing possessing Will out of him before it's too late and the cabin is far enough out of town that whatever happens hopefully won’t affect anyone else.

Eddie tries not to think too deeply about what that might mean.

He manages to find another portable heater in the Byers basement and hauls it into his arms before turning around to walk back up the stairs.

When Eddie reaches the landing his heart stops for just a moment when he realizes he can't see the kids. He takes another step into the kitchen and breathes out a sigh of relief when he sees the four of them huddled around the kitchen table with the still open Monster Manual.

Eddie pauses for just a moment when he spots a Hawkins County map beside the book.

It's covered in red marker.

An intricate design of lines ending with two circles…both around areas outside of the city center.

Eddie shakes his head and keeps moving, much to the visible relief of the kids as he makes his way to the back door.

One problem at a time.

He knows that Steve is around here somewhere, he was helping Jonathan carry Will to the car while Joyce and Nancy gathered as much rope from the shed as they could carry.

God, it's so dark now.

Eddie understands what Steve meant before, the way the trees rustle in the wind and the moonlight catches on animal eyes that shine in the dark. It's enough to put him on edge as he makes his way around the Byers property.

Every snap of a branch was a demodog prowling in the brush, every distant howl was a monster coming to drag him into the Underdark.

He shivers and keeps moving, fighting the urge to look over his shoulder every few steps.

Eddie finally makes his way to the shed, peering inside only to startle as Nancy's voice floats through the cool November air.

"Thank you, for staying with the kids," she says quietly.

Eddie freezes where he stands with the heater in hand. He knows he shouldn't be here for whatever this is, listening in on yet another private conversation between Nancy and Steve but his feet remain planted in the earth.

"Yeah well, I might be a shitty boyfriend, but it turns out I'm a pretty damn good babysitter," Steve hums so casually that Eddie wonders if it's really him speaking. They’re on the other side of the Byers shed, Eddie can almost make out their shapes between the uneven slates of the wood.

"Steve--"

"It's okay, really," Steve takes a deep breath, "you should go with Jonathan".

"Steve," Nancy's voice is wet this time as she speaks but Steve hushes her with a sigh.

"It's okay Nance,” he pauses for a beat, “all I want is for you to be happy, and I don’t think you’ve been happy for a long time”.

“What about you,” Nancy whispers, so softly that Eddie almost misses it this time.

Eddie hears the sounds of footsteps and the rustle of fabric, a muffled sniffle and several whispered words that he can't make out from this distance.

The whispering goes on for another minute or two before they fall silent, only the sound of cicadas and frogs echo in the midnight air around them.

Eddie takes this as his cue to begin to loudly walk over, purposefully grinding his steps into the gravel and walking more heavily than he normally would.

He comes around the corner of the shed to find Steve holding Nancy, his head on top of her own as she presses her face into his chest.

Eddie clears his throat and watches as Nancy steps away from Steve. He lets her go, both of their movements lighter than they have been in days.

"If you guys checked the shed, Joyce said it's now or never".

Nancy nods and walks over to take the heater from Eddie, giving him a warm smile as her gentle hands brush his own, and huh --he kinda gets it now. How Steve could have fallen head over heels for this secret badass girl, Nancy Wheeler.

"Thank you," Nancy smiles and Eddie sputters, running his now free hands through his hair.

"For what, I didn't--"

She raises a single eyebrow, and looks from Steve, before bringing her gaze back to Eddie.

"For being there, for all of them".

With that, Nancy walks back towards the house leaving Eddie to feel as though he missed a lot more of that conversation than he should have.

***

They finish refortifying the Byers house, boarding up the broken window that El had tossed the dead demodog through. Eddie adds one last nail and hammers it in before stepping back to admire their handiwork.

Steve lowers his hand from where he held the board in place and shoots Eddie a grin before he collects the box of nails from the floor and turns to put it on the coffee table.

"Steve?" Eddie says quietly. He doesn’t need to really, the kids aren't paying attention to the pair of them, but this is just for Steve. Eddie doesn't need four pairs of eyes staring at him as he tries to say this.

"I just, I'm sorry about Nancy".

Steve tilts his head in confusion, but Eddie keeps going.

"If we do make it out of this, I don't want you to think you were a 'shitty' anything".

Eddie winces as Steve's eyes narrow slightly.

"I'm guessing you were standing by the shed a lot longer than we thought," Steve says slowly as he looks back at the kids and takes another step even closer.

Eddie winces at being caught and nods, “I was looking for you originally to see if you guys needed any more help, and then I heard voices and just,” he shrugs, “I wasn’t sure if you’d be okay or not, after that”.

“And for what is worth, you definitely have changed,” Eddie offers with a sly grin, “I don’t think anyone would have expected Steve-the Hair-Harrington to use Faberge, let alone let us plebs in on his secret”.

Steve’s mouth opens and closes before breaking into a wide grin, a startled laugh falling from his mouth, growing in volume until Eddie can’t help but join him.

Steve raises his hands to run over his face and into his hair as he looks at Eddie, the grin on his face softens slightly the longer he looks.

Suddenly, his eyes harden and the look of determination from yesterday takes over. Steve squares his shoulders and breathes out a strangely broken sigh before he reaches out for Eddie's hands. He takes the hammer from him and sets it down on the coffee table beside them.

"My Nonna told me once," Steve whispers, using his hand to point into the middle distance, "Steven, people will come in and out of your life all the time, and the ones that are meant to be there will stay, and if they go, then it wasn't meant to be".

Steve breathes out a sudden nervous laugh, "she was so straightforward and I loved that about her".

Eddie doesn’t dare to breathe as Steve shakes his head.

"And you, you stayed," Steve continues softly, "and I just…"

Eddie's own breathing picks up as Steve leans closer, enough that Eddie can count the freckles on the bridge of his nose.

"Fuck what Dustin said, I think I need more people in my life like that".

Eddie's eyes widen slightly as the words begin to register. No, no way, this can’t be happening.

He lets out a strangled laugh and leans away from Steve’s space, “more friends in your life right?”

It all happens so quickly after that.

Steve freezes where he stands. His face moves through several expressions, some so brief that Eddie can’t quite tell what is going on before it smoothes out once again into something blank; Steve lifts his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose before dropping it to his side and nodding.

“Yes, right, friends, duh,” Steve laughs but it's not at all like the bright wild one he let out just a few seconds ago.

This one was dull, hollow.

Eddie opens his mouth to say something, anything to wipe away the horrible emptiness in Steve's eyes but Dustin suddenly pushes past Eddie to grab the sleeve of Steve’s jacket.

"Steve!" Dustin says frantically, "Steve, we have a problem!"

The sound of a car door slamming outside catches their attention and a sinking feeling begins to form in the pit of Eddie's stomach. There's no way Hopper and El would be back from the lab yet, and Jonathan said they would radio if there were any changes.

So who the hell was outside?

Part Six

Tag List:

@eriquin @luvinthefreaks @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @goodolefashionedloverboi @ellietheasexylibrarian @bambibiest @sadboislovebeans @howincrediblysapphicofyou @coleys-a-nerd @whycantiuseunderscore @airconditioning123 @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @corrodedbisexual @starman-jpg @ilovecupcakesandtea @yoriposts @clumsiluni @pelinelin @phantomcat94 @lololol-1234 @anaibis @airconditioning123 @steveshairspray @hellfireone @sunswathe @eddielives1986 @tentativeghost @robin-not-batman @estrellami-1 @manda-panda-monium @tinyplanet95 @perseus-notjackson @queenie-ofthe-void @rainbowsaw @sp0o0kylights @littlebluejane @hi-im-eff @phantypurple @just-ladyme @thoroughlycollected @justrandomfandomstm @swimmingbirdrunningrock @finntheehumaneater @dynamic-powerm@nightmareglitter

and for some peeps that I think may be interested! @steddierthings @steddie-there @steves-strapcollection @henderdads @stevesbipanic @spooky-brakers

454 notes · View notes