#maybe thats the best thing to do rn?

[cdmodule]

My 1 take I can give on current bfdi/tpot "criticism" (which I don't see much of but It Exists) is that from what I've seen is that a good chunk of it can be boiled down to "It's not pre split bfb"

#i try not to post opinions like these a lot cuz #1. i rather have these discussions with my friends if anything #2. I don't use social media as much anymore so I see less discourse #but its like #it kinda baffles me how when i DO see criticism towards the show a lot is just #'its not charcter/story driven and doesnt have/finish arcs' #which. may i remind you #in pre split bfb they didnt finish or halfass them either #it was so ambitious. too much for its own good imo #and sure itd be cool if we had that but #thats just not what the show is #for the majority of its run #i feel like ppl are too postsplit poisoned idk #thats its own can of worms #maybe now that bfdia is continuing ppl See what i mean that when i say #tpot is rly just More of that era bfdi again #sorry but if you want smth more character and story driven you may just want a Different Show #cuz tpot isnt bad for that. It's just not what you want #anyway i think the show is the best it could probably be rn and im having fun #if i want smth more srs i look at other things

[gwcnstcy]

.

#cant sleep bc im thinking so many thoughts #hiding in the tags #i think im finally over her? #like today and the last time we hung out i didnt Feel it anymore #and its not like i dont love her anymore i really really do but now its in a best friend way only i think? #the Feeling wasnt there which i guess its a good thing #and like yeah maybe its the depression maybe im just not feeling anything rn but also like #thats why she broke up with me and even when her depression got better she never got back to Feeling it? #and last time My depression was bad i wouldnt feel anything at all except when we hung out #so it feels different now #not necessarily a bad different just Different #but im so fucking scared of losing her #like im so scared of when she starts dating again #and yes ive been thinking of dating again im desperate for a girlfriend #but shes the one who broke up with me and shes had to deal with this before with Him and she didnt feel bad #but when we started dating He felt bad so like. i get him #and im so scared of never getting into a relationship again bc she’ll Always have a part of my heart like even if i dont Feel it anymore #she’ll always be number one for me #and im scared ill never let myself love anyone else bc i wouldnt think its fair to them bc of her #and idk. #i really dont wanna lose her she means so much to me #and im so comfortable around her in a way that im not with anyone else #idk where im going with this #sometimes i really fucking hate being aroace #and not being able to tell the difference between different feelings #:( #whatever

[dockaspbrak]

A big thank you to my mutuals who like my nervous breakdown 2-4am posts. You're the backbone of my blog

#its like im not completely alone #idk #what losing a cat does to a woman i guess but #lets be real i was like this before #im just a sad person who laments more than takes action and #i think ill be sad forever probably #in that way some people are #i feel like im one reality over from where im supposed to be yakno? #i used to have this image id hold onto of leaves in the sunlight when i was a kid and i kept waiting for someone to talk to me who #would take me wherever that was #maybe thats the nature of never fitting in u get too in your head and then #reality doesnt feel like home #yeah ive heard people say shit like that sbout books #sorry im not wearing my glasses #lately days blend together and i feel like i cant hold into time #and people talking to me (when they do) sounds miles away #takes ages to get to me if it does at all #oops! sounds like im dissociating hahahahaah oh fuck #when u write it all out. stares at ya right in the face #if im not doing something it feels like my anxiety will latch onto anything #like. rn i feel like im gonna throw up bc of like 5 different things about my car #car insurance. registration. trying to find a job #then it spirals into what ifs. and how thatd suck #constantly this shit. constantly! the only reprieve is going to hang w my grandmother who is 90 and talking about death a lot #😵‍💫 #but shes my best friend so ???! fuck! #man idk. im so sad. idek what to do abt this. work out #maybe get a new actor to have a crush on #what makes people happy? idk

[starlooove]

I’m trying not to be a hater but that tiktok and comment section pissed me off so bad.

#the way the fics end in Bruce saying sorry and everyone coddling tim and tims like ‘well I was just a placeholder 🥺’ #the fun part about tim is that he made grown ass decisions at a little ass age that literally everyone told him would turn out bad #and then it turned out bad and he knows he dug his own grave so he just has to pretty it up as best as he can #and if he could go back in time he would do that shit again BECAUSE HE LIKES IT! BECAUSE ITS EXCITING! BECAUSE HE WANTED TO BE ROBIN #that Robin is a job shit is a lie he told himself that literally nobody around but YALL the stupid ass audience believed #that’s like the crux of him I think #lying to himself to get the job done because he can’t let his emotions get in the way but unfortunately that’s not how it works #and when he realizes that he gets pissed at everyone else for not letting it work and himself for not making it work #he somehow thinks that he can remove this attitude as tim Drake when Robin is the crutch tim Drake leans on in adulthood #which is an issue because now everyone around him is moving and he’s still stuck at 14 knocking on dicks door and hoping that he’ll have to #make use of the suit he brought with him. not because he’s excited or anything but just in case #his friends and family died and came back Gotham gets destroyed every other day and rebuilt every other week everything keeps changing but #nothing is and he’s stuck in that cycle and maybe it’s his fault for not letting things rest but he refuses to accept that because he’s GOOD #as Robin he does excellent work and always has and nothing will change that not even a new Robin. his friends are all making names for #themselves and he’s still stuck under Bruce’s cape fighting a teenager to be robin. #THATS whats fun about tim #the writing is stuck rn I’ll give u that but the next move should be an acknowledgment of that #tim doesn’t wanna peak in high school so he has to move on but he doesn’t know how and matter of fact doesn’t know why! nothings been this #permanent before (<-LYING!) #but no whatever everyone hates him realizes they’re wrong and he leaves Gotham bc he deserves better but comes back bc he’s so nice. ok.

[strwbrymlkshake]

I am trying so hard but it still isn't ENOUGH FOR YOU? DON'T YOU SEE HOW HARD I'VE BEEN TRYING?

#mine #normally i've been good about not being too upset over things #but oh fucking boy. okay. im glad people are scared of me #i hope they know that im the only right one in the whole world and they are wrong and are justified for fearing me and im glad my existence #will turn them off from sharing their wrong opinions. but oh FUCKING BOY? ive been sitting here the whole time like oh they hate me #oh they hate me so much they want me to die wahhh and im trying to do all the things they like because im for some reason fucking bothered #by their other opinions. even though the people themselves are useless trash #and oh. like i was suspecting it but its finally confirmed huh??? you all cant fucking stand the sight of me because im right? #you dont understand the truth?? they hated him because he told them the truth? thats me as fuck rn dude #i am literally gracing your eyes with the content i make and basically hand feeding you the correct opinions to have #and yet you still reject them! people just love being stupid unfortunately. i want to kill them all. #i would be so much nicer if you all just agreed with me on the objective truth but unfortunate you have to be stupid #i have graced you with so many GIFTS and protected you from my wrath so many times but you do not even give a fuck #WHY AM I CRYING. YOU ARE ALL SO USELESS WHY AM I CRYING!!! MAYBE ITS BECAUSE YOU DONT AGREE? #i guess im crying because they are all so stupid #so what im saying is its very unfortunate that everyone does not worship me and all my opinions and the world is very hard. yes. #friendship ended with self hatred now delusions of grandeur are my new best friend #even trhing to explain myself makes me sound like a shithead but i swear to fuck if you all just listened to me like youre supposed to #then absolutely nothing would ever go wrong! but you all had to be stupid on purpose! do you like being wrong? whats your problem #explaining all the reasons im RIGHT and yet i still feel bad for having the gall to do so. i shouldnt feel bad. im doing great. youre just #uncomfortable in the fact that YOURE wrong and making me have to accomodate you for your wrongness? tf is that about #okay lunatic rant over i have finished crying ☝️

[madhushala]

🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯🕯

#i gotta plan and make to do lists so fucking hard ive only got two months #im getting so excited about studying?! 😭 #i think now that finals are close enough i can see the path clear #its like that rumi quote the closer im to things the better i see how far im from them or something #i think i messed up second internals and i do not want to be casual anymore #i do not have time to be sad about if im getting involved in petty hostel shenanigans i want to study #idc if i end up scoring less that the girl who only studies night before and end up scoring more than everyone somehow im doing this for my #future #please god help me be focused and motivated please #im glad i skipped classes to spend these 9 days at home even if i can't go home for another four months and have to cry my brains out #ig ill be okay #ive lost all my hobbies and interests and all i can think about rn is jobs and internships so i think thats what i can do #study #if not the best at least consistent #okay maybe ill listen to ttpd #but STUDDDYYYYYY

[green-day-dad]

i miss my friend but how do i tell them i miss them without bothering/messaging them :’((

#ooc #i think im safe to post this here but also im sick rn so maybe my thoughts are clouded by illness #i know im not being ignored but damn it feels like im not someone they can just talk to anymore and that sucks #like we had a convo about not being tired of talking to each other a few months back like #even if we’re out of social battery it wouldnt matter if talking to each other #and now im part of the ‘oh yea you dont know’ group and it feels weird sjjfjfkkskfkkskd #trying so hard to be a normal person about this #im sure theyre just busy and im trying to drill it into my head so it doesnt bother me #but to have gone from being able to chat at least once almost everyday for the past decade to silence if i dont send a message… hurts #and if you DO stumble upon this (again im sick and im sure u use tumblr sparingly) #i dont want to guilt you into talking to me bc thats the LAST thing i want is to add to ur stress #but ig this in itself could do that and i dont mean to #just stuck in a weird loop and again i miss my best friend so much

[bylertruther]

thinking about how lonnie only ever cared about will when he died and that was just to profit off of his death + will giving a girl he doesn't know his toy truck just because she's crying and he thinks she needs it more even if he knows joyce can't buy him another one + one of the very first things will did upon waking up in the hospital was ask if jonathan was okay + will telling them to close the gate in season two even though he's part of the hivemind and that would've killed him, too + will breaking his own heart by confessing his feelings and giving mike the painting he's spent so long on but saying that all of it came from el thus sacrificing his own wants and self to again help others + how that same selflessness and self-sacrificing nature of his is going to undoubtedly rear its head in season five again because he's at the center of it all and it all goes back to him and vecna is a creature that feeds off of n fans the flames of pain and guilt... feelin very scared n anxious in this chili's tonight over this actually 😳

#he is NOT going to die obviously clearly we know this they're not killing kids #BUT. #i'm just saying.... i don't think it would be crazy for him to feel guilty and like maybe this wouldn't have happened if... #well... u kno.. :( #he would never give up bc that's literally his whole thing that he's a fighter and a survivor #but. he does love his friends and his family. and he has been willing to die if it meant saving them before so like. yanno. #BUT IT WON'T HAPPEN I'M JUST SAYING THE ANGST IS LIKELY GOING TO BE THERE #AND THEN OFC EVERYONE IS GOING TO BE LIKE ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY WILLIAM SHUT UP SIT DOWN AND GO TO TIME OUT #and then we'll get some good n scrumptious hurt/comfort ok no one stone me i'm knocking on wood ok i Kno #just imagine will proposing that and everyone immediately says NO and mike especially gets pissed #because he's SICK and TIRED of fucking losing will every single time he thinks he's got him back #and god dammit he's already seen what life is like without will there he's not going to do it again he's NOT #don't go where i can't follow + crazy together + it was the best thing i've ever done + it's hawkins it's not the same without you #versus closegate + el commissioned it + she needs you and she always will #mike who is clutching onto will for dear life unwilling to let him go and will who is all too willing to #walk through the gates of hell if it means saving everyone he's ever loved and putting them out of their misery #but of course there's a better plan and letting will die is like killing a puppy it's like taking a sledgehammer to the foundation of #everything yanno. without heart we'd all fall apart n u can't beat the darkness without the light #anyway. can u tell i'm procrastinating editing my fic rn n thats why im writing epic poems in these tags <3 #mine

[nebulaleaf]

horrified tails meme .png

#AYO THAT AKECHI GLOVE POST... SOMEONE IN THE TAGS IS VAGUEING ME? #i dont care but also i do care because i Just woke up and im cranky #'atlus has inconsistent characters and its weird as fuck to have a Gotcha moment' HOW IS IT WEIRD I WAS JUST POINTING OUT OP WAS BLATANTLY #WRONG JAJFJCKS #AND... ITS NOT INCONSISTENT IF IN EVERY SINGLE SITUATION HE WEARS HIS GLOVES THE SAME WAY? #THATS JUST YOU MAKING UP A GUY AND PROCEEDING TO GET MAD WHEN CANON DOESNT ADHERE TO THAT GUY #which is very akechifan core #im so iritated by this not as One Guy Bothering Me but as like a model of hiw akechi fandom is as a whole #and i know any fandom has clowns who ignore clear canon for the sake of Deep HCs but im being annoyed at persona rn so shush #its just curious to me because firstly. akechi is not kyoko kirigiri. if you want someone with emotional attachment to their gloves go play #danganronpa. because shes there and waiting. for akechi his gloves are part of a uniform and convenient and thats it #can you make an argument that there's something going on at a metaphoric level or otherwise during his removal of his glove at rank 8? #oh yes. absolutely. there is something there in both the removal of the glove and the act of him tearing it off himself. and maybe in the #Why and Fact he wears gloves. but idt its a symbol of a wall between him and others when he freely takes them off for an entire four months #and he's actively denouncing the PTs then so its not anything to do with liking them and 'showing sides' #blehhhh BLEHHHHH!!! #shout out to the one other guy agreeing witb me youre the best #i think the gloves do showcase a disconnect from other people as a surface level design thing for initial impressions if youre looking that #upon first seeing him but. thats from an ooc perspective. ic he wears them for work! and thats that

[justinefrischmanngf]

i need to stop giving people my instagram i think like it’s not conducive to appearing in people’s lives and then disappearing i think i should start a number/email/letterboxd only policy because i am in such a good place to meet people and then just disappear and that’s all i need from life rn and instagram is hindering me massively in that i’m literally going to start doing this

#the best interactions with people i ahve had since moving have been people who i have spoken to completely openly to and then we have never #spoken again #this is not true i get to see vicky and that’s lovely and i also have made another friend so that’s been good #but generally like idk i just dont want to be tethered to anything i dont really want #i am always going to be tethered to my family and for so long i was tethered to ballet #i just dont want it anymore i want all my moving to be my choice not my parents #the longest i have ever lived in one house is 4.5 years #how could i possibly be expected to stay in one place after all that #i just feel this incredible barrier between me and anyone except like 2 people #i cant connect to anyone and insteadof being upset about it i just feel crazy #i’m not sad or put out over it it is just how it is for me sometimes #and i do need to reply to the people i care about but at the same time it’s like what’s the point #what’s the poitn when i just feel so disconnected fundamentally from nearly everyone i have ever known #and the thing is i do want to flit in and out of peoples lives it’s not even like i want to change this #i had a beautiful conversation with this man the first week i was in uni and he was incredible to speak to and i hope i offered him some of #that too and neither of us made any move to exchange any contact details or even our names #and THATS what i want that’s what i want from my life rn #which is maybe bad for me but i think it’s all i have in me rn #which is not true really i’m not going to stop talking to my friends and im not going to not make friends probably #but it’s such a gorgeous idea and i AM good at it i am good at talking to people once and then never again #i can do that

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

I kind of want to do a temperature blanket, but I don't care about the temperature, so I'm trying to think of something along the same format that's not as boring as temperature. I'm thinking maybe moon phases? I considered sunrise and sunset time, but it would require a lot of yarn and I'm not sure exactly how I would format it. Any ideas?

#i love knitting. its very calming #and i can do other things like listen to podcasts or music or watch a show while i do it #(it kills my hands because i was stupid when i first started knitting but we dont talk about that) #if you knit please don't push yourself too hard. take breaks. stretch your hands every few rows #ive made two blankets and a scarf and right now im working on a boanket for myself #the two blankets were for my best friend and my sibling. the scarf was for my girlfriend #now im working on a blanket thats just for me #because i realized i should probably stop or really limit my knitting after this #i really fucked up my hands tbh and i like using sign language and playing instruments so i dont want to make them worse #but a blanket like a temperature blanket is only one or two rows per day #its nice and limited knitting so i think i can manage that #but i dont know what to do! #i really do like the idea of moon phases because i love the moon :) #but im not sure. and id like a couple more ideas #my gf recommended tv show genres because im always watching a tv show #but rn im watching two game shows and a crime drama #maybe podcast genres? i love listening to podcasts because im alone so much at my job #and i usually dont listen to more than one at once #oh thats a cool idea #anyway lmk if you have any other ideas #love yall bye

[trashcreatyre]

there is something inherently insane about writting so flowery and descriptive while listening to songs in the the same vain as BIG SHOT

#also i am very eepy but i feel like thats when i do my best first writting #its like a first draft but instead of re-writting the whole thing i just fix the grammer and spelling mistakes until it makes sense and #then its done lol #trash rambles #although my colors are rotating rn so maybe i should sleep #i will attempt one more paragraph and then i will go #hrrrghhmm mim imimi #y know #snore sfx

[goredinner]

Realized why im sorta kinda avoiding him

#he said hes just stressed with work and thats why hes not replying as fast #but like last time he started replying slow #lets just say it was not bc of work stress but bc he was ig uh Preoccupied and not with me #so #yeah #now i just get nervous as fuck when he replies THAT slow #ig it was better than being replied to once every few days like thst time but like #still reminds me and scares me lol so yeah ig i'd rather avoid being apoligized to again for smthn like that #when im not stable at all rn. if he lied abt it being bc of work and stress and whatever snf instesd bc of another girl(s) then #hesring thst rn would fuck me up worse like legit scared it'd push me over the edge that im currently trying my best not to fall off of #i hate. avoiding him. esp if he really is just stressed rn and im nit there for him but #he wouldn't rely on me anyway and he admitted i was just stressing him out even more and i just cant control myself to be normal #or fine or whatever with the slow replies #last thing i want to do is bother him ever so i just need to give him space from me #mostly to protect my own sanity bc he's made me feel insecure and like i cant trust him anymore sadly #but yeah also bc i dont want to bother him more than i already have on top of what he has to deal with already #i miss him a lot and i kinda want to cry #im tired of being unstable all the time. i just wsnt to be normsl and be able to handle things #i cant barely even handle things correctly when i am stable #makes me wonder why tf i even try at all #this shit sucks #so bad #my chest hurts #maybe i should leave him alone bc i probably cant handle him to begin with lmao #im so weak #no one can even handle me honestly #i dont think he csn either snd he shoukdnt have to so why dont i just fuck off already #god idk #ofc im overthinking but how can not when i have feelings for him. how do ppl NOT overthink and catastrophize everything #when they love someone sm

[alltheglowingeyess]

.,.

#I WANNA GO BACK TO COLLEGE GAHHHHH #i'm so bored back here like i have three friends i stayed in touch w from high school #and like everywhere i gotta drive and i just dont wanna leave the house #but even if i do wanna leave and i make plans my friends and i r always like where tf do we even go??? #like in our immediate area its just so boring #also like being in my okd bedroom. is so weird?? #i feel like very time im back home i feel all these emotions and things from being a high schooler again #and its more so annoying than anything bc that stuff is just not a part of my life anymore #byt when im back home thats all that is there to think abt idk #and i mean my parents r just tooooo much like...... #its just annoying going fron living my life indoeendently to being back under their roof i think #idk im just gonna keep rotting this break tho maybe try to plan a small trip w friends #im so tired of being the one to plan things but like thats a whole other issue omfg #idk good thing is tho ive got my dog :3 hes so silly like hes over the moon everyone is back home rn #bro is living his best life my little smelly baby boy I MISSED HIM SM 😭😭😭😭😭 #glow gabs

[youraveragemushroom]

</3

#pro tip #do not use online recommended tips for controlling your anxiety #they told me to read a fucking poem i liked to get my mind off shit #and now im breathing wrong and crying and shaking and clammy for two reasons #it wasnt even a sad poem or anything it is one thats always brought me joy #but like thats the thing about depression its gonna make you not enjoy the things you love #and you forget how to love them because it takes your memories your thoughts it takes everything #and iky im like this its anxiety its depression its a (open) secret third thing thats worse than both combined #and i cant will it away with a lovely poem at least not this one maybe but every pretty word i can think of rn #they taste acrid its burning my throat it feels like the worst heart burn yet because it feels like my heart is on fire #and the smoke is suffocating me from the inside out #and im screaming im screaming but no noise is coming out the soot is choking me the ashes are all that’ll be left #i wonder if i’ll be exhausted extinguished still existing by the end of this #because i have to believe theres an end even tho i cant see it rn #its like god in a sense because i have to have faith in the ever unknown #but i have a shitty relationship with religion with devotion specifically #i cant like myself much less want better for her #i miss the person i was before #i see pictures and i looked happy and i was bigger but i miss her #every year i mourn the person i was and the person i couldve been and i hope the best for who i might be but i dont have any hope myself #anyway wake me up when september ends please i need to put this month behind me #more than that im a coward and i was raised in a nonconfrontational household that never resolves issues just #spend three days being weird and moody w each other and then pretending like it never happened #i was set up w the generational trauma and homosexuality like pick a struggle god said no <3

[toastsnaffler]

nvm im too tired and overstimulated for this shit

#.vent #i only slept a couple hours last night man. i cant do short notice evening socials on an empty tank let alone resist unexpected rsd #if they had let me know earlier then i wouldve taken a nap and worked out beforehand to get my energy back up #idk just. if u rly want my company then maybe u should actually invite me next time. its not like they didnt plan it #even if they just forgot its not particularly pleasant to be the one person insignificant enough to forget abt. theres only 5 of us #they rly remembered to ask the one guy who isnt even here before me yknow. ugh u see the stupid thoughts i have to battle!! #like on a rational level ik it was probably genuinely accidental. but the way i instinctively react is not always rational #so regardless someone has to deal with the emotional fallout and thats me. regulating this shit is hard work even when im NOT tired asf #i really really dont want to be an asshole and spoil anyones fun bc its no-ones fault + as real as it feels to me rn ik im overreacting #but i cant voluntarily expose myself to personal triggers when im already exhausted + more vulnerable than usual #so just gotta shut myself in my room and deal with it in my own super healthy ways as per usual. may they never fucking find out #trying my best not to be an asshole i hope to fucking god they dont think im being an asshole i just told them i was tired + i meant it #this wouldnt be so much of a problem if it hadnt happened to me before. and also ik its bc one rsd trigger makes me more sensitive- #to picking up unrelated cues but there ARE other things they do that i find ostracising which rly dont fucking help. but- #theyre not things i can actually confront them abt so usually i just gotta deal w it which is fine but it lowers my general tolerance #its ok. its ok i like them all a lot theyre lovely ppl and it doesnt matter if there is a some grain of truth in the things im thinking #bc the risk of me believing + acting on a bad faith irrational thought leads to outcomes that are far worse than those from #misidentifying someones malicious behaviour towards me as neutral by accident/in good faith. okay im done now i think #just ignore me spewing out the old brain gunk on main again eurgh anyway im gonna go calm myself and read and SLEEP #ill be normal by tomorrow morning farewell comrades #honestly i dont mind dealing w shit this way bc its the best option for everyone but man. sometimes its so fucking lonely #like there are sides of me ppl will never engage with and for good reason but without them being acknowledged i find it rly hard to feel- #any real emotional intimacy or closeness with another person. but what other option is there #i sure as hell dont miss the fights i used to constantly get into when i wasnt able to regulate myself i lost so many friends that way #it is what it is. on we go for now