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jonathantaylorthomas · 6 years

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[excerpt] 15. This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Does anyone apart from Pusha T relish a good diss track as much as Swift? 2017’s Reputation might have its patchy moments of just-out-of-date beats but it’s also full of deliciously vicious moments. I Did Something Bad was a beautiful middle finger to an ex (Calvin Harris, apparently), Look What You Made Me Do cut down her critics and this track, which is effectively a more bitter Bad Blood, battered Kim and Kanye. “Friends don’t try to trick you/Get you on the phone and mind-twist you” she sings in an apparent swipe at the ‘I made that b**** famous’ controversy, while underneath stuttering electro-pop clashes with tinkling piano. The chorus is Swift at her most bitingly patronising, smiling as she twists the knife in.

14. We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together

Swift managed her first US number one with We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together. The singer’s knack for an earworm is obvious here, with the song one of the simplest but strongest of her career. The rest of Red dabbles with pop but Swift’s country roots are still very visible here. A foot-stomping acoustic guitar riff is right at the heart of the track, which is a much lighter take on the relationship at the heart of All Too Well. The old Taylor might not be able to come the phone right now, but she was on top form here.

13. Our Song

Jaunty violins, talk about God, a Nashville accent that twangs like a banjo string: Our Song is Taylor in full country mode. It’s got all the hallmarks of her early verse-chorus-bridge songwriting, and Swift reportedly put it together in 20 minutes for her ninth grade talent show before the record company nabbed it for her debut album. Built around a colossal chorus, where her delivery cracks like a drum beat, Our Song is a vivid picture of her teenage years and a testament to Swift’s natural songwriting nous – a reminder that, despite the headlines, she’s built a career on talent, not merely hype and controversy. Tim McGraw, which starts the album, has much the same effect.

12. I Knew You Were Trouble

2012 album Red took Swift’s popularity to new levels and the universal appeal of I Knew You Were Trouble was a key part of that success. The song became one of the most parodied tracks of the year but even adding screaming goats into the mix couldn’t the hamper its impact. It’s perhaps surprising that despite the song’s success, the chorus marked one of the singer’s most experimental to date, flirting with dubstep, pop and dance influences. It’s the perfect example of Swift’s early musical experimentations – as was the U2-esque album opener State of Grace – which would eventually pave the way for the reinvention on 1989 two years later.

11. Shake It Off

Shake It Off is perhaps the perfect song to explain Taylor Swift and seems to encapsulate the contradictions which have made her a star. For everything that’s toe-curling and cringeworthy (see: “this sick beat”, the whole “my ex man” riff), it’s also infectious, irresistible and triumphantly confident; Swift knows it’s geeky and doesn’t care. It’s a song to shimmy to – and then to kiss your crush to, when she asks the fella with the hella good hair to shake, shake, shake. Grab the white wine and go be basic – sometimes it’s fun.

10. 22

While Swift can occasionally lean-in on her wry way of seeing the world, she’s also gloriously unafraid of big, dumb pop. 22 is almost comically simplistic: the opening guitar riff is just a watered down Wild Thing, the drum beat is mindlessly insistent – a bass kick on every single beat – and the main hook (“I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling 22”) has all the intelligence of a failed GCSE. None of it matters; the song is a joyous riot, set in a world where there are no pressures, no bills and the sun only goes down so everyone can go to bed together. It is fun, it is silly, it’s happiness is infectiously single-minded and the best lines come right at the end: “You look like bad news, I gotta have you”. There’s even Nile Rodgers-style guitar thrown in on the chorus. Splendid stuff. No wonder it’s said to be Harry Styles’ favourite Swift song.

9. Fifteen

Much has been made of Swift’s big transformation from country singer to pop behemoth but even before she was out of her teens she was flirting with stadium friendly rock. Still, Fifteen had plenty of banjo all over it, while her voice charmingly twangs as she talks boys and cars and heartbreak. Of which, it’s the lyrics that make this one: the song itself is so polished and clean it could have been assembled on a Tennessee production line, but Swift manages to infuse it with a sense of failed teenage romance that feels real – unsurprising, perhaps, given it’s based on her and her best friend Abigail Anderson’s years at Hendersonville High School.

“In your life you’ll do things greater than/Dating the boy on the football team/But I didn’t know it at fifteen” she sings, “Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now”. Ain’t that the truth.

8. Love Story

Ten years ago, pre-Kanye-at-the-VMAs, Swift was, in Britain at least, still that country girl with that one catchy song. This was that song; a hopelessly romantic tale of teenage love, Shakespeare’s Romeo & Juliet over pop-punk guitars and key changes and, of course, a happy ending replacing the tragedy. Eight million copies sold, making it the best selling country single of all time and paving the way for the decade of massive success that followed.

7. Blank Space

Blank Space is a minimalist masterpiece that paradoxically is crammed with hooks (something she manages again, like a magic trick, on Clean). The song in itself is actually surprisingly slow-moving; chords are long, drawn-out and the drums snap but are unhurried. The genius here in is Swift’s vocals, which are catchy enough that the whole thing seems to be one long chorus. Blank Space also marks the beginning of Swift sending herself up; in it, she satirises her media image as a man-obsessed, relationship addicted nightmare who serially dates for songwriting material. Hilariously, the key line (“Got a long list of ex-lovers/They’ll tell you I’m insane”) has often been misheard – including by her own mother – as “all the lonely Starbucks lovers”, which rather changes the point somewhat. The video is a work of art too, introducing the world to the ‘new Taylor’ – before the new Taylor became the old, dead Taylor. Oh, and look out for her slip up at 3.40, it’s hilarious.

6. New Year’s Day

The beautiful, reverb soaked piano that flutters through New Year’s Day is a sign of what could be to come for Swift – not now, perhaps, but maybe in 20 years. It could be played then and just as good. If All Too Well is her great grown-up heartbreak track, this is her great grown-up love song. Whereas 1989’s You Are In Love used a similar sound for a rip of Bruce Springsteen’s Street’s of Philadelphia, here it’s more of a James Blake vibe. The beauty is in the simplicity; this is a love as rational as it is passionate. The metaphor is about being there for the good times (the party at midnight) and the bad (cleaning up bottles on New Year’s Day). There is a stroke of brilliance, too: “Please don’t ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognise anywhere” she sings as a reprise, realising what too few of us do until it’s too late: love is as fragile as it precious.

5. You Belong With Me

Taylor has a long-standing love affair with power chords and pop-punk goodness. On Red, there’s Holy Ground, before that was Speak Now’s girl-breaking-free-to-rule-the-world Long Live and before that was You Belong With Me on Fearless. It’s sometimes criticised for being too similar to her other early hits but in truth, it’s just the best example of them. It’s also wonderfully full Taylor: she plays the self-deprecating dork in love with her best friend, and the video is completely, brilliantly hysterical. There are all the elements needed: crashing guitars, unrequited love, a little teenage angst. It’s far from perfect: the lyrics are her corniest, the premise is cliched and the country embellishments have been tactlessly tacked on as if purely to placate the country audience. But, in the end, it’s catchy, sweetly endearing and you’ll be singing along merrily. If you want another fill of the good stuff, put on Fearless, which is just a little less catchy but with a better guitar solo.

4. Ronan

Little known, not on any albums and barely performed live – to date it’s only been aired twice, with the first version live on a Stand Up to Cancer telethon the one to listen to – Ronan perhaps seems a unlikely entry on the list, but it stands the Swift song that aches the most, and is unlike anything else she’s written. Over the chime of trembling guitar chords, she sings as the voice of Maya Thompson, a mother who lost her four-year-old Ronan to cancer. Written after reading Thompson’s blog, Swift articulates the unsteady, insistent rhythm of grief with painful clarity. In the end, like in life, the loss stings the sharpest in the little things. “And it’s about to be Halloween, you could be anything you wanted” she sings, her voice shaking and her eyes glassy with tears, “If you were still here.”

3. Out Of The Woods

Like the heartbroken logic in All You Had To Do Was Stay (the song Ryan Adams’ did best on his mixed 1989 cover album), it’s the naivety in this one that makes it so damned sad. Jack Antonoff produced a piece of driving rock dressed up as radio-pop, the stuttering drums and Blade Runner synths casting shadows over everything, the choir on the chorus giving it enough size to fill stadiums. It’s one for anyone who’s been wrapped up in a love that’s left them shaky with the uncertainty of it all, who’s gone to sleep and woken up with the same thought, of praying they’re getting as much love as they’re giving.

2. Style

Like a designer parading a new collection down the runway, Swift showcased her new direction perfectly on this aptly titled track. Pulsating synths drive the verses along before a huge sing-along chorus kicks in, marking a dramatic change from her guitar-led earlier compositions. It’s a formula that Swift would return to time and time again in her later work, not least on the similar Getaway Car from 2017 album reputation. The song remains a highlight at Swift’s live shows — after all, pop hooks as good as this will never go out of style.

1. All Too Well

Everyone jokes about the lost scarf, but this is Swift’s most sincere tale of heartbreak and is heartbreaking itself. Though it takes a handful of listens at least to ‘get’ this track, it’s worn out and weary and the hurt goes deep. Swift says it was one of the hardest to write, and it’s one of the hardest to listen to; she sounds like she’s singing right from the bones and it’s searingly, uncomfortably intimate. Having it on doesn’t feel so much like listening as eavesdropping: other ruminations in her back catalogue are broader, relatable, but here we’re hearing her specific turmoil. Nowhere else on record does she sound as cut up the way she does halfway through this one – Jake Gyllenhaal, you realise, really broke her heart.

Plenty of Swift songs are overwrought, but the drama here is sincere: her voice trembles with pain, and the song, which starts sparse, swells and hardens up like a lump in the throat. It’s little surprise the original cut was 10 minutes long; the song is cinematic, with a touch of Raymond Carver in the sparse, classically American lyrics: “'Cause there we are again in the middle of the night/We’re dancing round the kitchen in the refrigerator light”.

When she gets to end of it, there are lines that induce a wince: “You call me up again just to break me like a promise/So casually cruel in the name of being honest” she says. Then you hear her lost to her heartbreak: “Time won’t fly, it’s like I’m paralyzed by it/I’d like to be my old self again/But I’m still trying to find it”. Love – especially when it cools – changes everything.

#this list is a mess #lol

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aion-rsa · 3 years

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Marvel’s WandaVision Episode 5: MCU Easter Eggs and Reference Guide

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This article contains WandaVision spoilers through episode 5, possibly beyond, and for the wider MCU.

WandaVision episode 5, “On a Very Special Episode…” took everything we liked about the first two episodes and shook them up. For the first time, we have a fully blended approach to the storytelling, with the episode alternating between the altered “sitcom” reality of Westview, NJ and the actual, current MCU events. And then there’s that multiverse-shattering ending to contend with.

There’s a lot to break down with this week’s WandaVision, so we’d better get to it…

Sitcom Influences

WandaVision took us to the ‘80s this week, with a little Growing Pains, some Family Ties, and maybe a hint of Full House thrown in for good measure. The living room set itself looks very much like the standard seen on shows of the era, specifically Family Ties and Growing Pains.

Family Ties

The aging up of Billy and Tommy is much like Andy Keaton from Family Ties. In season 4, Andy was born and spent the whole season as a baby. As of the beginning of season 5, Andy was suddenly about 5 years old with zero explanation.

Also from Family Ties is the beginning of the opening credits, where it would show someone painting a colorless sketch of the family.

Bettany’s Michael Gross impression was extremely disturbing in how good it was a couple of times.

Growing Pains

Wanda and Vision getting vaguely horny for each other while doing regular domestic stuff is reminiscent of the way the parents would occasionally get it on on Growing Pains and Family Ties.

The sitcom theme lyrics and feel are extremely Growing Pains. And yes, as you might expect, they are very appropriate for these characters.

Here are the full lyrics for you (courtesy of the Disney+ closed caption feature):

“You wander the world with a vision…Of what life could be But then the years come and teach you…To just wait and see Forces may try to pull us apart…But nothing can phase me If you’re in my heart Crossing our fingers Singing a song We’re making it up as we go along Through the highs and lows We’ll be right, we’ll be wrong We’re making it up as we go along And there will be days…We won’t know which way to go But we’ll take it higher…You’re all I desire When the going gets tough…When push comes to shove We’re making it up Cuz we got love we got love we got love We got WandaVision”

Darcy also refers to Vision “playing Father Knows Best,” a callback to the sitcom style of the first episode.

We wrote in more detail about the sitcom influences of WandaVision episode 5 here.

Scarlet Witch

For the first time, we get the names of Wanda’s parents: Irina and Oleg Maximoff, but in the comics they were known as Django and Marya.

Wanda was born in 1989, the same year as Elizabeth Olsen.

We learn here that the “Scarlet Witch” codename has never been used in the MCU

Darcy refers to the anomaly as “the hex” after the hexagonal patterns that were noted in the previous episode. In the comics, Wanda’s powers are often referred to as “hex bolts.” She could also produce “hex spheres” and the town seems to be enveloped in a large one here.

Wanda’s accent, missing since Avengers: Age of Ultron, makes its triumphant return here.

Wanda talking to the kids about how “my brother is far away from here” is technically true: his corpse is…nowhere nearby. Although given how the episode ends, she could very well have been referring to another corner of the multiverse. We’ll get to that soon enough.

SWORD seems to refer to what’s going on as “The Maximoff Anomaly.”

Vision

We now know that Vision’s corpse is physically present in Westview and he isn’t just a manifestation of Wanda’s powers, nor was the horrific image of him glimpsed at the end of episode 3 a hallucination: it was Wanda seeing him as he really is.

Vision is working on a Commodore 64 at Computational Services. This early personal computer was a terrific gaming machine, with graphics and sound that were far better than early home gaming consoles of the era.

Vision apparently had a “living will” about what he didn’t want done with his body in the event of his untimely demise. Think of it like the MCU equivalent of a DNR. No, not a “do not reveal.” The other thing.

House of M

Before Agnes shows up the second time around, Vision is reading a newspaper with the headline, “LOCAL HOMEMAKERS INNOVATING RECIPES.” Moments later, he folds the newspaper in a way so that it only says “HOM.” HOM is short for the big Scarlet Witch comic event House of M.

The Twins

While it’s used as a setup for the twins inexplicably growing up, Wanda and Vision are horrified to find that the babies have simply vanished. In the comics, the first time we really get an idea that something is wrong with the children (as well as Wanda’s mental wellbeing) is when they show us that Billy and Tommy would cease to exist when Wanda wasn’t around.

This episode is the first to really feel like it’s borrowing a lot from Wanda’s most important story: the Dark Scarlet Witch story from Avengers West Coast. In that book, the first clue that something was wrong with Wanda was how the twins would disappear when she wasn’t looking a them. This would often happen when Agatha Harkness (presumably Agnes here) was babysitting for them. And later, Wanda’s personality started to shift towards full villainy and she was very cavalier about the use of her powers, something we start to see in this episode.

For most of the episode, the twins are dressed in red and green. This more than a nod to their parents’ favored color schemes, but it appears to mirror the colors they adopt when they grow up to be superheroes themselves. William becomes the hex-wielding Wiccan, who favors red, while Tommy favors green (like his Uncle Pietro) as Speed.

Sparky

Poor Sparky. Good boy.

The name “Sparky” is a reference to Tom King and Gabriel Hernandez Walta’s brilliant Vision story, in which Vision and his “family” (not the Maximoffs) move to the suburbs and try to live a “normal” life. Part of that includes a synthezoid canine named “Sparky.” He didn’t meet a good end there, either. Stop letting dogs die in our stories, you monsters! It’s too sad.

Lagos

This week’s commercial is for Lagos Brand Paper Towels, with the catchy slogan of: “For when you make a mess you didn’t mean to.”

This references the opening scenes of Captain America: Civil War, when Wanda used her powers to stop Crossbones from detonating a bomb in a crowded marketplace. While she reduced the number of casualties overall, a number of innocent civilians still died when he exploded. It’s the first indication that Wanda’s grief and trauma in Westview are driven by far more than just the loss of her lover.

The Lagos ad is also another reference to the Infinity Stones. Previously, we’ve had the toaster (Power), the watch (Time) and the Tesseract-shaped bath powder (Space). Here, we have a red liquid spill in a sly nod to the Aether (Reality). Only the Mind and Soul stones to go – which means two more commercials.

X-Men

These are definitely not the only X-Men references in the episode (of course), but we’ll get to that big one down below…

The scene of Wanda confronting SWORD agents looks to be directly inspired by the scene in the first X-Men movie where the police try to take down Magneto. Much like Wanda, he uses his powers on their guns, causing them to be aimed at the cops themselves before escaping. Considering the payoff to this episode and Magneto’s role as Wanda and Pietro’s sometimes-father in the comics (not to mention Pietro’s definite father in the X-Men movies), this was more than likely set up.

Vision says he was reading Charles Darwin’s “The Descent of Man” to one of the twins, a book that deals with evolution. (David Bowie voice) “Gotta make way for the homo superior!”

The Twilight Zone

Serious Twilight Zone “It’s a Good Life” vibes in the episode throughout, particularly when Agnes is visibly weirded out by Wanda with her “take it from the top” moment (unless she’s deliberately screwing with everyone), and the mailman telling the twins “your mom won’t let [Sparky] get far.”

Also, while we’re on the subject of The Twilight Zone, Agnes appears to live at the corner of Maple St. and Sherwood Drive. “The Monsters are due on Maple Street” is a notoriously paranoid unpacking of suburban paranoia.

Westview

The opening credits feature a “Greetings From Westview, NJ” postcard in a pretty common format, but one made most famous on the cover of Bruce Springsteen’s “Greetings From Asbury Park” album.

We wrote more about Westview in general here.

“For the Children

Vision points out that there are “no other children in Westview,” which calls to mind the creepy “for the children” chant from back in episode 2.

Captain Marvel

Darcy draws the connection between how both Wanda and Carol Danvers got their powers via an Infinity Stone. Similarly, they acknowledge Wanda almost took out Thanos in Avengers: Endgame but that this feels outside the scope of her powers. Still, the fact that both Wanda and Carol stood up to Thanos isn’t something that’s being glossed over in the MCU.

Note Monica’s reaction when the name “Captain Marvel” is said isn’t exactly what you’d call enthusiastic.

Monica Rambeau

Monica’s test results coming back blank seem pretty significant. Is this a signifier that her molecular structure has changed, whether from the blip or passing through the hex barrier? Are we witnessing Monica’s superheroic origin story in slow motion?

Who is the Villain of WandaVision, anyway?

Despite the implications from the end of episode 4, Wanda isn’t completely in control of what’s going on. At various points in the episode she seems to be manipulating everything, but at others seems to be completely immersed in this reality.

But if she doesn’t remember how this all started, that sets up a potential villain reveal (or more than one) down the road.

What’s up with Agnes?

Agnes is complicit but was disturbed by Wanda’s ability to “resurrect” so how much can she really know? Unless, of course, she’s just “acting” this way to continue with her cover.

On the other hand, Agnes “helping out with the kids” is kind of in line with our Agatha Harkness theory for the character.

Reed Richards?

Monica mentions that she has a particular “aerospace engineer” in mind to call for help. Based on all the other subtle Fantastic Four clues that were in the fourth episode, could this individual be Reed Richards?

If they aren’t taking that big a swing, it could be Adam Bernard Brashear, known as “The Blue Marvel,” another prominent Marvel scientist, and one who has led the 616 version of the Ultimates with Monica on the team.

Evan Peters is Pietro

“She recast Pietro?”

Yes, you are indeed seeing Evan Peters returning as Pietro Maximoff/Quicksilver here. This is (at least until it’s revealed that the MCU Wanda and Pietro were indeed mutants whose powers were merely “activated” by Strucker’s experiments) now officially the first appearance of a mutant/member of the X-Men in the MCU. Peters, of course, played Pietro in three films,X-Men: Days of Future Past, X-Men: Apocalypse, and Dark Phoenix. While Aaron Taylor-Johnson played Pietro in Avengers: Age of Ultron, Peters played him in Days of Future Past, and he was generally more warmly-received by fans.

And does this indeed mean that Pietro is alive again, albeit in “recast” form? Or is Wanda so powerful that she ripped open a hole in the multiverse itself in order for her brother to “make a guest appearance” in Westview? This could very well be the first indication of what’s to come in Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness and the possibly Spiderverse-y Spider-Man 3.

Unless…what if this isn’t Pietro at all? What if it’s someone manipulative merely taking the form of Pietro to mess with Wanda even further?

Also, Pietro’s “bad boy” appearance very much feels like it fits with the Family Ties aesthetic. His “New York tough guy” look and persona is much like Nick, Mallory’s idiot boyfriend. Coincidentally, Nick also starred in an episode of the show where he got a dog and it died soon after from an accident.

We wrote much more about the shocking WandaVision episode 5 ending here.

We Are Kind of OK With the ’80s

Jazzercise was indeed a real thing, god help us.

For those of you thinking the internet was a whatever a reverse anachronism is, we made the same mistake too. But it turns out it has been around in some form since the 1960s, when the Advance Research Projects Agency (precursor to today’s US government mad science agency, DARPA) networked a few computers and sent messages back and forth.

Unanswered Questions

Dennis the Mailman is back from episode 1. His little aside to the kids is an indicator that he is vaguely aware of what’s really going on. Not necessarily in a sinister way, but a reminder that the people of Westview aren’t really enjoying this.

One of the camera feeds we see is from Satellite 348. Avengers #348 had a Vision-centric cover and story.

Is there a significance to the stuffed animal on the chair at the beginning? I thought maybe it was a stuffed Bova or something, but I think it’s just a bunny.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

Spot anything we missed? Let us know in the comments!

The post Marvel’s WandaVision Episode 5: MCU Easter Eggs and Reference Guide appeared first on Den of Geek.

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jafreitag · 4 years

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Grateful Dead Monthly: Brendan Byrne Arena – East Rutherford, NJ 10/16/89

On Monday, October 16, 1989, the Grateful Dead played a concert at Brendan Byrne Arena in East Rutherford, New Jersey.

Brendan Byrne Arena, aka Meadowlands Arena, was built to accommodate the NBA’s New Jersey Nets, who were moving from the Rutgers University Athletic Center. The arena opened in 1981 across a highway from the old Giants Stadium, and eventually served as home for the Nets, the NHL’s New Jersey Devils, and the Seton Hall University men’s basketball team. The arena was also an event and concert venue that hosted local favorites Bruce Springsteen and Bon Jovi, as well as a variety of other big-name acts. It ultimately closed to the public in 2015. According to the Wiki, “the vacant arena is [currently] used as a rehearsal venue for large-scale touring concert productions as well as a sound stage for video and television productions.”

The Dead played Brendan Byrne sixteen times from 1983-89. 10/16/89 was their last show there. LN Deaditor ECM was in attendance and offers this reflection:

This was a special show because it was my first Dark Star, but the band sure did make me sweat it out by waiting until the final night of a five-show run to play it – on a Monday night, too! But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s back up just a bit.

The previous week, the Grateful Dead opened the 1989 Fall East Coast tour with two shows at Hampton Coliseum. Those shows were billed as “Formerly the Warlocks” (a nod to the band’s original name) because there had been some trouble at the Dead’s Hampton shows in the past with ticketless people, gate crashing, and drug arrests. As I recall, these shows were not announced on the Dead’s hotline and were not available via mail order like the rest of the tour was. Instead, tickets were made available at only a few select Virginia locations, making them very difficult to get, if you lived out of state, as I did. Somehow, my friend Scott and his wife, Noelle, scored tickets, but I didn’t know it at the time. So imagine my surprise when Scott called me at around 12:30 a.m. on Tuesday October 10th to tell me what had just gone down in Hampton. I was a year out of college and had a real job so I was sound asleep. The ringing of the phone jolted me out of bed. I fumbled to find the phone in the darkness and clumsily answered it on the sixth or seventh ring. At first, I didn’t recognize the voice on the other end of the line because the caller was hysterically screaming with excitement. Eventually, I recognized the voice as Scott’s. He was calling from his car phone (very rare at the time), and he was talking so fast that I could barely understand him. There were broken words here and there that I recognized like “Hampton…Warlocks…Oh my God…best fuckin’ show I’ve ever seen….oh shit, I’d better pull over before I get in an accident!” After he pulled over, Scott told me all about the bust-outs: Help/Slip, Death Don’t Have No Mercy (neither of us knew it had been busted out the previous week at Shoreline, no internet), Dark Star, and Attics!!! I thought he was joking at first. Help/Slip and Dark Star, while both rare, were somewhat believable since they had both been played in the 80s with Brent. Attics and Death, on the other hand, were a horse of a different color. Both hadn’t been played since 1970, and most fans considered them retired for good. I must confess that it was a little difficult to be “happy” for Scott. I had missed “the show,” or so I thought.

The band rolled into lovely East Rutherford, New Jersey on October 11th for a five-show run at the Brendan Byrne Arena. I had secured mail order tickets for every show. There was definitely a buzz in the parking lot about what had gone down in Hampton. Everybody was hoping, praying, and wishing that the band would play some of the bust-outs again. Nobody dared to say the words “Dark Star” for fear of jinxing our chances of seeing it. The new album, Built To Last, was about to be released on Halloween, so there was great anticipation about that as well. Promo materials like the album artwork and the iconic deck of cards were floating around the parking lot. There was a sense that the band was on another creative peak which created an overall vibe of happiness and excitement among fans.

On a more somber note, this was also the run when the body of Adam Katz, a 19-year-old fan, was found by a motorist lying on a roadway outside the complex on October 14th. He died the next day from a single blow to the head with a ”blunt instrument.” His death was later ruled a homicide, but nobody was ever charged.

As I recall, the four shows leading up to October 16th were nothing to write home about. I am sure that there were highlights but the only memorable thing about those shows is what the band didn’t play – Dark Star.

On the afternoon of October 16th, Garcia made an appearance on WNEW-FM, New York’s big classic-rock radio station and when asked when Deadhead’s might get to enjoy the band play Dark Star again, he replied, “Sooner than you think.” Whoa! Did Jerry just signal Dark Star? If that wasn’t enough, October 16th happens to be Bob Weir’s birthday. There have been some memorable shows on October 16th – most notably Amsterdam in 1981, but also Winterland in 1974 and LSU in 1977. The planets seemed to be aligned for the makings of a great show.

The crowd roar was deafening with great anticipation when the house lights finally went down. The birthday boy opened the show with Picasso Moon. It was a curious choice because the band only played it three times since its debut on April 28th, and it hadn’t been played since May 7th (which coincidentally happened to be another band member’s birthday – Billy K). All three of those versions were very rough (to put it charitably), and many fans assumed that the song was DOA. The band must have spent time working on it in the studio because this performance is delivered with oodles of confidence and sounds the way it would on the album and all future performances. I was never a big fan of the song because it sounded like a pimped-out version of Hell In A Bucket, but boy does this version rock!

Next up is an upbeat Half-Step. Garcia is in fine form, and Brent’s piano is twinkling. In a surprising move, the band plays the instrumental part of the Rio Grande-O section, but skips the vocal part, making this a shorter version than usual. I’m not sure whether this was intentional or not. Garcia switches to his Mu-Tron effect, and the song kind of washes out with a brief pause of uncertainty. Maybe he realized that he forgot the vocal outro of Half-Step. Anyway, the band quickly recovers and forges right into Feel Like a Stranger, which makes for a nice transition since both songs are in the same key It’s a great choice that keeps the energy high and perhaps signals that things will indeed “get stranger” later as Brent growls, “It’s gonna be a long, long crazy, crazy night.” Garcia gets nice and funky in the jam to create a full-on dance party in the Meadowlands.

In another rare move, Bobby gives the “blues slot” to Brent this evening who leads the band through Good Times Blues (aka Never Trust A Woman). It’s an unrecorded song that debuted on 8/28/81 and was played less than 50 times ever. It was refreshing to hear something other than Rooster, Minglewood, Walkin’ Blues, and CC Rider. The change must have invigorated the band because they completely nail this version. Brent never wasted an opportunity to shine on his own songs and his vocals and B-3 organ solo are amazing. This is a stand-out performance of a song that would be played only 4 more times!

Jerry follows with Built To Last – another new song on the upcoming album. This is a great version, however, the song would be played only two times more before being retired forever. It makes one question the wisdom of choosing to name an album after a song that would not remain in their repertoire.

Another surprise awaits as the band breaks the usual song rotation between Jerry and Bob. Tonight the birthday boy gets to sing lead vocals on the next two songs. Memphis Blues Again fills the “Dylan slot” nicely. Bobby is all over this version with lots of exaggerated vocals. I love how versatile Brent is with his solo on Memphis Blues. Sometimes he uses his electric keyboard, sometimes he selects a MIDI sound, and other times, like this evening, he plays his B-3 organ. As soon as the band plays the last note, Bobby begins strumming the chords to Let It Grow. This is an exquisite performance. The “rise and fall” section is particularly gnarly with Garcia effortlessly switching his sounds and getting some nice guitar runs in.

“Let it Grow” was typically a first-set closer during this era, but the band gives us a bonus song with Deal. 1989 was a very good year for Deal, as exemplified by the versions on 6/21 (Shoreline), 7/19 (Alpine) and 7/4 (Buffalo), all of which fall within the top 10 rankings on the website, headyversion.com with the latter ranking #1 and #2 respectively. Tonight’s version doesn’t quite reach those amazing heights but still holds a respectable #12 rank, which is to say that it is quite the barn burner. With their jam chops sufficiently warmed-up, Bobby announces a break. What a great first set filled with jams, uptempo songs, and rarities.

The air was thick with anticipation when the band returned for the second set as everybody held their collective breath hoping…wishing…praying…for “IT.” Things got eerily quiet and then Jery played the first signature notes of Dark Star. The New York audience explodes with joy. Smiles, high-fives and hugs abounded everywhere. Euphoria. This starts out as a very melodic Star that doesn’t really stray from the usual pre-first verse theme. The first verse comes after about six minutes. Jerry’s voice sounds a little rough but the spirit is clearly there. The post-lyrics jam continues with the melodic theme but starts to show signs of weirdness at around the 9 1/2 minute mark. If you listen carefully you can hear Jerry switch the key signature from A to D to set up the transition into Playing In The Band. He blasts off some rapid, spacey runs at around the 11 minute mark, which land on the introduction of Playing. Now it becomes clear that the band is treating us to a set that is similar to Hampton, except in a different sequence.

At 8 minutes, this is a relatively short Playing, but the band flexes its spacey muscles very concisely. Here, Jerry explores his MIDI library more than he did in Dark Star. I especially love his use of the pan flute at the 3:40 minute mark. So trippy!! The jam becomes melodic again as Jerry leads the way into a super-kind Uncle John’s Band. This is a very upbeat version with strong vocals by everybody. The D-minor jams in the middle and end of the song are spectacular – more cerebral than rocking. Garcia briefly re-states the Playing theme, and then goes off into the cosmos of deeper and deeper space until finally there is nowhere else to go except surrender the stage to the dummers, where we were treated to the Beam.

I must admit that hearing the opening strains of I Will Take You Home was disappointing because it did not seem to fit with the spacey theme the band created. But, once again, Brent puts on a stellar performance, which is accompanied by the lovely accents of Jerry’s MIDI french horn. Brent holds the last line, “I willllllllllllll….take you home.” This is followed by a swell of feedback out of which Bobby slams into I Need A Miracle. The loud, thrashing music is jarring and at odds with the overall vibe of the set thus far. It is perhaps the only possible misstep of the entire evening, but thankfully it is short and leads back into a reprise of Dark Star, which at this point feels like “home base.” All is quickly forgiven. Jerry stays on the melodic theme for almost four minutes of blissful serenity before delivering the second verse. A few descending notes later Jerry starts Attics of My Life. These two magical songs were combined only once before – the famous Capitol Theater show on 6/24/70!!! What a treat! This was the first time most of us had heard a live performance of Attics, and the audience stood in almost complete silence hanging on every lyric. This was church!!! The band delivers the lyrics tenderly like a fragile prayer, and the all-important harmonies are gorgeously sung.

The show could have ended right there as far as I was concerned but the band cleverly segues into Playing to complete the reprise the same way they did with Dark Star. First there was chaos in the universe, and now there is symmetry. Damn, this band is good.

Jerry, Bob, Phil and Brent returned without instruments to end this epically throw-back show the only way possible – with a gospel-infused version of And We Bid You Goodnight. It remains one of the most memorable shows I have ever seen.

10/16/89 was memorialized as the live album Nightfall of Diamonds. Here’s the Spotify widget.

More soon.

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shortgirlwrites · 6 years

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Hi guys, it’s me again, and for our last post of April 2018, I’ve decided that writing about books is canceled. We’re writing about my favorite music now: 80s music. If you know me in real life, you know that I love everything 80s–the music, the fashion, the movies….

In fact, let me treat you to two of my favorite 80s outfits…sorry that you can’t see my awesome 80s makeup, but trust me. It was great. In the first one, it was a spirit day at school, and the other one is Halloween–I was Diane Court from my favorite movie, “Say Anything” (and yes. It was released in 1989. I’m a monster.)

However, we’re not here today to talk about any of the dubious fashion decisions I’ve made in my life. Instead, we’re here to talk about my music obsession. Now, I’ll listen to nearly anything, but my two favorite genres are punk and 80s (I’m counting it as a whole genre). Let’s go into some of my favorites. (I limited myself to 15 for the sake of space, but it was a pretty tough call)

Dancing in the Dark by Bruce Springsteen (1984)

This song is one of my favorites. It’s on my “If My Life Were a Movie” playlist, and I just feel it, man. The lyrics rock. I can just imagine it playing during the opening credits as I’m like, getting dressed or something meta.

St. Elmo’s Fire (Man in Motion) by John Parr (1984)

This. Song. I can dance and belt along to this song any day. I feel like, in my life movie, this would be the “Transformation Song”–like a friend and I would power ballad it for a talent show in ridiculous outfits and the whole school would rally behind it. Okay, I’m getting weird.

Kiss by Prince (1986)

Yeah, the subject matter of this song isn’t exactly PG. But the beat is hype, and it’s a Prince song, so what’s not to love? If you know me in real life, you may have seen me dance to it ridiculously at some point. Oh well.

Always On My Mind by Pet Shop Boys (1987)

This is actually a cover of a song originally from 1972. It’s actually been covered by Elvis Presley and Willie Nelson, too. In case you wondered, looking up current pictures and old pictures of Pet Shop Boys is hilarious. Nothing has changed except for the hair color of the men (it’s white now).

How Will I Know by Whitney Houston (1985)

The ultimate ballad of girls wondering if their guy is for real. Yes, I know her awesome song “I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)” didn’t make the list, but both have a similar vibe. They’re very “classic 80s” as opposed to “cheesy 80s”, and they get to be timeless like “Careless Whisper” (and “Never Gonna Give You Up”, except it got majorly memed).

Mad World by Tears for Fears (1983)

This song has been covered so many times. Like, it’s ridiculous. And all the covers are always really slow and melodramatic–I honestly super prefer this version, the original. I feel like the 80s quirk helps the message get across better. You can dance and also feel like the world is ending. Fun!

Karma Chameleon by Culture Club (1983)

Let’s be real, Culture Club exhibits all things quintessentially 80s, from Boy George to their wacky videos to their songs that, in the ears of today, would sound absolutely ridiculous (because they are). The video for this one, which is great to dance to, by the way, is really weird.

We Built This City by Starship (1985)

What. A. Bop. My favorite part of the song is the radio report part. Just listen to it, you’ll get it. I just feel like that part totally “gets” the message of this song.

Let’s Dance by David Bowie (1983)

What’s an 80s playlist without some David Bowie? I love this song. It, for some reason, makes me think of Queen (if you judge me, I will be unimpressed). This song had to grow on me, but I love the beats in it. A master made this.

I’m Alright by Kenny Loggins (1980)

If you know me in real life, then you know that one of my things is, when people say they’re alright, asking if they’re “really alright” or “Caddyshack alright”. Yep, this song is from Caddyshack. And I love it. To be fair, I love Kenny Loggins.

Sunglasses at Night by Corey Hart (1984)

The epitome of 80s cheesy angst! If you listen to nothing else on this list, you gotta listen to this. It’s absolutely ridiculous and I love it. Really wanna do karaoke to this in something bejeweled someday. I feel like it could be awesome.

Broken Wings by Mr. Mister (1985)

Another very “80s cheese” song. My mom loves this song. Also, I love belting along to it. And with a band name like Mr. Mister……This is also a song that, in my opinion, should have been on the “Say Anything” soundtrack. But maybe it’s too cheesy for that movie. Who knows?

You Want It by Cheap Trick (1989)

This song is, surprise, from “Say Anything”, and I love it. It’s the only song on here that I feel could span other decades besides the 80s (of course, it came out in ’89, which is a bit late in the decade). What an absolute bop.

Take My Breath Away by Berlin (1986)

AKA the love theme from “Top Gun”. I love this song with all of my heart, oh my gosh. It’s just so luscious and beautifully made. It’s almost dreamlike. An absolute must-listen.

In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel (1986)

That’s it, this is the song that makes my heart melt. It is one of the signature songs from “Say Anything”–if you don’t know, that’s the movie with the scene where the guy holds up the boombox in front of the girl’s window–and this is the song playing when Lloyd holds up the boombox for Diane. You have to watch the movie to know why this song is significant. And so you can cry your eyes out. It doesn’t matter where I am when I heart this song, I just melt.

Tell me, everyone, would you like to see more posts about things like movies and music, not just books? What’s your favorite music? And what books should I review next?

Peace out,

Short Girl

Top 80s Music Hi guys, it's me again, and for our last post of April 2018, I've decided that writing about books is canceled.

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thissurroundingall · 6 years

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Bert Huyghe

A long-term thing, at least for the moment.

Nederlandse vertaling

Date of interview: November, 2017

Estimated reading time: 12 minutes

Before visiting his studio, we meet up with Bert Huyghe (°1989, Eeklo) in a Ghentian sandwich parlor, the city being his artistic headquarters since many a year. Apart from the late post-punk band Ping Pong Tactics, the countless releases and booklets, the Geuzenprijs awarded essay The Boxer and his slightly provocative, sometimes hilarious performances, Huyghe especially manifested himself as a painter, producing thickly layered, colorful canvases, instantly recognizable by their smeary charm. With clumsy virtuosity they speak of painting itself, in all it’s treacherous self-evidence. Since 2017, Huyghe is represented by Brussels’ Rossicontemporary, alongside a.o. John Van Oers, Luc Deleu, Lore Stessel and Ritsart Gobyn.

Some time later we find ourselves in the centre of creation. Some recent works are being put up for us: a collection of football shirts, dangling from an imaginary clothesline on the studio wall in a familiar candy and Nickelodeonlike color spectrum. An eclectic mix tape of Bruce Springsteen and trap is stuffed inside the cassette player. Bert talks without uh’s, sometimes thoughtful, then again floating on a linguistic rapid. We’re caught up in a discussion on the social position of the artist. Lots of interesting stuff has already been said and I haven’t even pressed the record button yet.

You could also say that normal life consists of making two thousand euros a month and that art and strange paintings are of no value to society whatsoever.

So Bert, why do you paint football shirts?

Well, because the forms and colors attract me. It’s not about which teams or brands they represent. They are paintings, in the first place. I don’t really want to talk about adidas, or them being a big multinational. I don’t sit at my desk first, trying to decide on whatever good cause I will engage myself for. That’s not my job. Being an artist I’d rather embrace adidas, to examine such a brand visually and show it to the world, on a highly personal level. That’s also taking your responsibility. Because I really am a nineties kid, influenced by sports clothing and television during my very nice childhood. Of course I think one should be critical and reflective. But on the other hand I can’t deny being psyched about a new pair of sneakers. I wonder: how will people look upon those brands in a thousand years? That three-stripe pattern goes back a few generations now. What does that mean for us? To investigate that also means taking one’s responsibility.

Right now we’re in a peaceful beguinage. To what extend does this environment have an influence on you and your practice?

It’s nice and quiet around here, that’s what I like about it. For me, the studio is a vantagepoint from where I can look at the world, while it’s turning upside down. You could also say that normal life consists of making two thousand euro a month and that art and strange paintings are of no value to society whatsoever. But the opposite is true: the studio is the only place of value and normality. To get back to that social aspect: I don’t think Guston painting Ku Klux Klan figures should exclusively be understood as a political statement, I presume he also did it just because he felt like painting funny shoes, or because he liked to use the color pink, or because he loved comics. Researching a medium and the world outside and what that means for you as a person, can’t be separated. You always tell something about what surrounds you. Each medium offers it’s own set of tools for doing that.

You played in a band for many years. What place does music have in your visual practice?

Music was and still is very important. I also believe Ping Pong Tactics was all about finding an honest sound. At first we where booed at for sucking at guitar - given the fact that none of us had any musical training - or for wanting to make beautiful pop songs but singing them terribly out of tune. But in doing so, we created a ground zero from which we could start all over, rather like an existentialist approach to making music. Everything’s possible, everything’s permitted, what will happen if we utilize that freedom? I also see the anachronism of that attitude. Our songs had a nostalgic touch to them, often referring to our childhood, the rural environment we grew up in. That’s also why we split up: because we outgrew it all, I guess.

Everything’s possible, everything’s permitted, what will happen if we utilize that freedom? I also see the anachronism in that attitude.

Do you miss it?

I miss the physical aspect of making music, as one can also miss the physical aspect of playing football. You should always, at a certain moment, be able to stop any collaboration. However much there is to be learned, there’s always that danger of becoming each other’s clone. Then you know the time has come for finding your own voice again.

(pauses)

To maybe answer your question: a certain childishness is also present in my paintings. It’s about therapeutically approaching my youth, I guess. Therapy is an important function of art. For the record: I did have a very nice childhood. Maybe this also makes the studio into a place of freedom, a space where you can be more like a child. At the same time, my ten-year-old self would probably say that I could make much nicer drawings than these. Thanks to the fact there really wasn’t any art where I grew up, I could approach things with an open mind once I got a little older. I often entered the room doing something that had been done a hundred times before, but just a little louder. Half the people liked it, the other half turned their backs. I didn’t really mind.

It’s about therapeutically approaching my youth, I guess. Therapy is an important function of art. For the record: I did have a very nice childhood.

Do you care about what people think of your work?

Look, I’m very glad Rossi(contemporary, red.) represents me, for example, and that they really believe in what I’m doing. This gives me time and space to seriously work towards a goal, to really accomplish something. Of course everybody sees something different in my work. When they identify themselves with themes like childhood, football or the Simpsons, that’s just great. When they think I captured an aspect of our generation, I even take that as a compliment. But the last thing I want to do is to impose an interpretation on anyone. You know, lot’s of people come in here and ask how a certain painting was made: what’s beneath this, why’s that stain there… You’re asking questions about artistry in general, social themes and such. That’s fine by me. You do your job and I’ll do mine. A child also just likes to show it’s drawing, I guess. Of course we can’t compare how a child experiences art to how an adult does. Those are two completely different things. There’s that certain cartoonish jest that I’m sampling as an adult, but in the meantime I’m really looking for a way to paint like only an adult can. I think that’s a very serious job. I believe that doing something silly in a serious way is a lot more important than … doing something silly in a silly way. (laughs)

Of course you owe a lot to history and previous generations, and this may sometimes feel like a burden. But by now I’ve distanced myself from considering Walter Swennen my dad or anything like that.

Is it still relevant to be authentic, to create something original?

I for one believe I simply am my work. I don’t really care about who’s copying what or whatever. Of course you owe a lot to history and previous generations, and this may sometimes feel like a burden. But by now I’ve distanced myself from considering Walter Swennen my dad or anything like that. However interesting I may find his work. I also learned his generation looks at the world a lot differently than ours. You see, whenever you are something, you don’t really give it a second thought. It’s just who you are, at any given moment. That’s why I don’t regret anything, artistically speaking. I do regret buying a certain sandwich, but not my art. Even bad decisions are good, if there’s something to be learned from them. I’d rather focus on the ideas still ahead of me, instead of the ones I already had. I look upon all of this as a journey that will last until I’m an old man. That’s my greatest ambition, to do this forever.

I believe that doing something silly in a serious way is a lot more important than … doing something silly in a silly way. (laughs)

You are known to produce a lot of releases and editions, be it independently or not. May we expect anything soon?

My most recent booklets or ep’s where the result of a more intense process. This felt more to the point, in a way. Like you said, my production flow used to be a lot bigger. People like Gerard Herman also taught me a lot about releases and graphics. But here again, I currently look upon myself as a painter. It’s just what consumes all of my energy right now.

I guess something important has changed in that respect. Look, this might be interesting to show you guys (takes a big painting, puts it on the wall). I call this one my Cy Twombly. I still like Twombly’s work a lot, by the way. While I was making it, I tried very much to paint in a poetic, intuitive manner. Stuff accidentally falling on the canvas, drippings, stains ... You know, right. That way it almost turned into a beautiful abstract. Something in me resisted right away. I felt like that country boy again, not fitting in with all that prettiness. So the next thing I did was put on my name in big letters. At the same time, I also couldn’t make it into a purely conceptual painting: a white canvas with my name clearly printed out. Both attitudes are in perpetual collision. I was inconsistent, which is very important for an artist. Lately I tend to lean more towards the calculated approach because I’m making a series now. I believe it’s a long-term thing, at least for the moment. In that sense my work isn’t much like Swennen’s anymore. I can’t imagine him ever making a series.

As you’ve probably noticed, some time ago it was very hip to paint these meaningless abstracts with clumsy frames around them. But the fact that it’s a gimmick doesn’t mean I’m forbidden to do it also.

You’re working on landscapes now: a classic theme within painting. Is that part of the change you mentioned?

You know why I’m doing that? Because my grandmother once asked me when I would finally paint a landscape (laughs). My interest for The Simpsons and cartoons in general, from which I derive them, was already present. It’s just a nice coincidence that this connects to art-history. You know, we used to live in a beautiful rural area called Sint Laureins and this influenced me a great deal, but nature and landscapes we mostly just experienced like all kids do: within the artificial frame of a television set. No doubt I owe a lot to the canon. The Simpsons and football are also part of that canon, by the way. The bright colors of football shirts positioned on a pitch, the way they contrast one another: that’s painting in real life. It’s part of what attracts me in that sport. I could only find that out by intensively making lots of paintings. Constructivism was also influenced by sporting outfits, I’ve heard.

(pauses)

Actually, it’s all about painting. Everything else is just an excuse. How a painting is made, that’s what I find most important. The way I paint it, how that sets me apart from other artists. As you’ve probably noticed, some time ago it was very hip to paint these meaningless abstracts with clumsy frames around them. But the fact that it’s a gimmick doesn’t mean I’m forbidden to do it also. It’s about making an interesting image. Do I remove the black lines from a cartoon? Yes? So, why am I doing this then? Because it leaves me with plains of color, interacting with one another. That’s when it becomes a painting. Everybody thinks Lichtenstein just painted comics, for example. That’s not entirely true: he really selected those images, altered them, fixed the composition. All until they spoke as paintings, until only the right tension remained. I never dislike something somebody else has made, by the way. Worst-case scenario it’s just boring.

That’s the most profound quality of paintings: them being physical objects. You can just watch them as an accumulation of paint, a collection of colors. It’s a residue of an act.

Do you watch The Simpsons waiting for the right still? Or how do you start a painting like that?

No, I select images from the hundreds of interesting blogs exclusively occupying themselves with collecting Simpson’s screenshots. In that sense my method of image hunting is very contemporary. But that’s not what my work is about. I don’t really believe in the influence of, let’s say, social media on my work. I think people are still very much analogue beings. Internet and social media are just practical tools as far as I am concerned. That’s the most profound quality of paintings: them being physical objects. You can just watch them as an accumulation of paint, a collection of colors. It’s a residue of an act. To understand this, you don’t have to have any connotations. I believe, that as long as it’s good, it’ll float like oil. I don’t want to make a puzzle that has to be solved or anything. Some people like that about art, when there’s a solution. But that one solution doesn’t exist, if you ask me.

Interview and English text: Maxim Ryckaerts

English editing: Maia Daley

Photography: Sanne Delcroix

www.berthuyghe.be

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flauntpage · 7 years

Text

DGB Grab Bag: New Penalty Signals, Cherry Seventh-Best Canadian, and Hrudey on Duty

The three stars of comedy … will return

We're taking a break from the three stars this week, since a.) it's August and everyone who has ever played, coached, or worked in the NHL in their life is off the grid at a cottage somewhere, and b.) I've been away most of the week and probably missed anything funny that did happen. The three stars will return next time. Meanwhile, we have important business to get to in the next section.

Be It Resolved

Last week, I got very worked up about the NHL's weird insistence on treating holding the stick as a different penalty than holding, complete with its own hand signal. To be clear, I stand by that rant completely. I'm right and you know it.

In putting that section together, I had to dive into my copy of the NHL rulebook to verify that holding the stick was in fact the only penalty that forces the referee to perform a two-part signal, and in doing so, I realized something I'd never noticed before: There are four NHL penalties that don't have a signal at all.

Granted, they're the rare ones. Specifically, the penalties without signals are kicking, head-butting, throwing equipment, and too-many-men. You don't see those all that often. Still, they're in the rulebook. They should have some sort of signal. You can't ask a referee to announce a penalty and then just stand there like an idiot while everyone stares at him. We need to give these guys something to work with.

So let's do that. I've got some suggestions.

Let's start with kicking. That's the easy one. The referee just makes a little kicking motion. Simple enough, right? I mean, it would have to be a distinct kicking motion so that everyone in the crowd could make it out, but I'm sure the league could come up with a nice, easy definition for distinctive kicking motion that everyone would always agree on, so we'll just use that.

(Also, you could probably follow that up by having the ref pull out a phone, dial the police, and have the player arrested because he just freaking kicked somebody while wearing skates and is obviously a psychopath.)

Photo by Isaiah J. Downing-USA TODAY Sports

The head-butt is a little tougher. My first thought was that the ref would slap his own forehead, but older fans might get confused and think he just realized that he could've had a V8. So I'm going to go a little more extreme and suggest that he slam his head directly into the crook of his arm. It's simple, distinctive, and my son will get excited because he'll think the ref is dabbing. Everyone wins.

For throwing equipment, I think we go with the obvious: The ref has to wind up and toss his whistle into the crowd like it's the Rock's elbow pad. And yes, that does create a problem where the referee won't have a whistle for the rest of the game, but if it's overtime or late in a close game or the playoffs, he won't need it anymore, so we should be fine.

And finally, too-many-men. My first thought was that the ref should have count to six on his fingers, look confused, and then make an exaggerated herpy-derp face at the crowd. But that seems a little complicated, so let's keep it simple. Just point at the Bruins.

Be it resolved: All these new hand signals go into effect for the 2017-18 season. Please let any referees in your life know so they can start practicing now.

Obscure former player of the week

One of this year's bigger off-season moves was the Stars signing Alexander Radulov away from the Canadiens. Radulov had 54 points last year and occasionally goes into beast mode, so he doesn't qualify as an obscure player. His brother Igor does, though, so he gets this week's honors.

Igor Radulov was a winger who was picked by Chicago in the third round of the 2000 draft, four years before his brother would go to Nashville in the first. It was a good round for less-successful brothers, as Henrik Lundqvist's twin brother Joel had gone a few picks earlier. (Henrik himself wouldn't go until the seventh round that year, marking the last known time that his life wasn't completely perfect.)

It was a bit of a weird draft pick, because by the time the Blackhawks used it, it had been traded five times in deals involving everyone from Mike Knuble to Ulf Samuelsson to Niklas Sundstrom (twice!) to the No. 4 overall pick in the 1999 draft, which was Pavel Brendl. Theory: If you dig hard enough, every obscure player eventually links back to Pavel Brendl.

Anyway, Radulov remained in Russia for a season before heading to North America to spend a year playing for the OHL's Mississauga IceDogs (and head coach Don Cherry). He scored 33 goals, then moved to the AHL in 2002, where he got his first taste of the pro game. By the end of the year, he earned a brief call-up to Chicago, where he scored five goals in seven games.

That had fans and media expecting bigger things. Radulov made the Blackhawks out of camp for the 2003-04 season, but he got off to a slow start, scoring just once in his first 16 games. By December, he was playing under ten minutes a game, and then found himself a healthy scratch. By the New Year, he was back in the AHL.

While we didn't know it at the time, we'd seen the last of Igor Radulov in the NHL. He headed home to Russia during the 2004-05 lockout and stayed there, first with HC Spartak Moscow and later with the KHL. Unlike his brother, he never did make an NHL comeback; at 34, he was still seeing time in the KHL last season.

What has Don Cherry gone and done now?

We haven't used this section much lately, and to be honest, there's no real reason to break it out now. Don Cherry hasn't done much this week. He's on vacation, like everyone else. But since there's not much going on, I thought it would be fun to use this space to tell the story about the time Cherry was voted the seventh-best Canadian.

Yes, that actually happened.

I realize that American readers are probably wondering how this is possible. How could a country with so much history decide that a sports broadcaster was the seventh greatest person to ever live? That would be like naming John Madden or Vin Scully as one of the ten greatest Americans. They've had great careers, and people love them, but greatest ever? Like, out of everyone? Are you crazy?

Meanwhile, Canadian readers are like, "Seventh? Huh. That seems a little low."

When you are a bright spot in the history of your country. Photo by Charles LeClaire-USA TODAY Sports

Here's the background. In 2004, the CBC launched a project to determine the greatest Canadian of all time, creatively naming it "The Greatest Canadian." The end result was a top-50 list, determined by a multi-step public vote.

Cherry ended up finishing seventh, ahead of people like Alexander Graham Bell, Sir John A. Macdonald, and, oh yeah, Wayne Gretzky. He was narrowly beat out by names like Terry Fox, Sir Frederick Banting, and Lester B. Pearson. In case you're wondering, the winner was Tommy Douglas. If you Americans don't know who that is, he's basically the guy who brought Canada the concept of, um, you know what, America, maybe it's better if we don't mention it right now. Tommy Douglas is Kiefer Sutherland's grandfather, that's all you need to know.

The important point is that Cherry finished seventh, which gives you an idea of how insanely popular he's always been up here. There was a time when he absolutely could have run for prime minister. Hell, he probably would have won.

By the way, when the CBC program aired, each of the top ten was presented by a Canadian celebrity. Cherry's segment was introduced by Bret "The Hitman" Hart. Just in case you were ever wondering what the most Canadian thing of all time was.

Classic YouTube clip breakdown

Who's up for some terrible NHL goaltender-based rap/rock? Good. You're in luck.

Careful readers will recognize this clip from February, when it was rediscovered and broken down in detail by Kings bloggers The Royal Half. We gave it a spot in the weekly comedy stars section back then, but it was inevitable that it would work its way to Classic YouTube section status someday. That day has arrived.

So the background here is that it's the 1989-90 season, give or take a year, and a group called The Puck Boys has decided to record a song honoring the Kings' coolest player. No, not Wayne Gretzky. No, not Luc Robitaille. Not Bernie Nicholls, either. Those guys were good, but they didn't rock a baby blue bandana during games. No, the Puck Boys are going to sing to us about Kelly Hrudey.

To answer the obvious question: No, The Puck Boys are not a real band. They can't be. I mean, I don't doubt that at least a few of these guys are actual musicians, and the lead singer is… well, we'll get to him in a bit. But this is basically a casting call of musical clichés all mashed into one super-group. They can't possibly be an actual collective. There's just no way.

All that said, this is a pretty catchy song. You're going to be humming it all day. Consider yourself warned.

"Who's between the pipes tonight? Well let me check my roster…" Um, actually, the roster itself wouldn't have that information. You'd need to check your lineup. Once again, novelty hockey song bands' failure to hire me as a fact-checker comes back to haunt them.

Glove saves were just better in the 80s and 90s. The goalies always looked a little bit surprised to have actually made a save, and they'd really sell it by flailing their arms around. It always looked great.

OK, almost always.

We get our first wide shot of the entire band, which includes a guy in cowboy hat, a dude in a suit, and a small child. And, of course, there's our lead singer, who looks like Bruce Springsteen had a baby with Marty Jannetty and then let it be raised by Rico Suave.

Just to give you a sense for the attention to detail that's going to be in play here, we start off with our singer telling us about all the things they now have "one less" of, while holding up two fingers.

The singer is giving off some star power, but the undisputed star here is keyboard-suit guy. He has clearly a.) never played the keyboard before and b.) not quite got the hang of the whole "having elbows" thing. But he did break out the formal wear for this video shoot, so we'll give him that. Dress for the job you want, and all that.

This is one of those late-80s songs that would be described as rap but may or may not actually be. I feel like the inclusion "whopper of a stopper" kind of disqualifies it right there.

So about that lead singer. His name is Harry Perzigian, and he'd become famous under some less than ideal circumstances a few years later. He was accused of supplying drugs to the son of actor Carroll O'Connor, who later committed suicide. He later sued O'Connor for slander, and the whole thing was a reasonably big tabloid story at the time. Perzigian died in 2014; a friend wrote this tribute.

I feel like that may have been the most depressing paragraph in YouTube section history. Can we get back to hockey jokes now? I'm not sure we have a choice. Onwards.

"Is this real, we must be dreaming. Have you checked our goals against?" Yes, I have. Kelly Hrudey's goal against average in 1989-90 was 4.07, the fourth worst mark in the league. But in fairness, he posted a 4.34 in the playoffs.

As we're digesting that information, our next highlight is an opposing player on a breakaway just getting blatantly tackled before he can get to Hrudey. Probably the right play.

That player is Brent Ashton, by the way, and he's going to feature in like every one of these highlights. Seriously, it's all they have and it's going to get weird.

"It's 7:30, I'm OK," our singer tells us while pointing at his wrist, which does not have a watch on it. This guy is terrible at hand gestures. Working the name of the song into the wardrobe is a strength, sure, but hand gestures not so much.

We get more Ashton highlights, and… wait. Was this originally supposed to be a Brent Ashton tribute video? Did they write a whole song about Ashton, then scrap it at the last minute and throw it in a dumpster, where it was found years later and repurposed by Chris Parnell? It would explain so much.

We get our second identical shot of Hrudey decking Paul MacDermid. And with that, we've made it through our entire video while using highlights from one single NHL game. Come on, guys. Even the Neil Sheehy-era Capitals know you always use two or three to mix it up.

And because I know you expect me to know these things, I went back and tried to figure out which specific game all these highlights are from. We knew the Kings were playing the Jets in L.A. (home teams wore white back then), Kelly Hrudey was in net, Brent Ashton and Paul MacDermid are in the lineup, and the Kings won (since we see Hrudey pumping his fist at the end of the game). The only game from 1988-89 or 1989-90 that fits that criteria came on December 19, 1989, when Hrudey gave up five goals in a 9-5 Kings win. Wayne Gretzky had six points. Are you sure the goalie's the guy you want to be highlighting on this team, guys?

I don't think that's the kid's real voice, you guys.

The epilogue on all of this is that Hrudey spent the next five seasons in L.A., and was significantly better over most of that span. He finished fourth in Vezina voting in 1990-91, and helped lead the team to the Stanley Cup Final in 1993. Was he inspired to those heights by this song? We can never truly know for sure, but yes, he was.

Have a question, suggestion, old YouTube clip, or anything else you'd like to see included in this column? Email Sean at [email protected]. DGB Grab Bag: New Penalty Signals, Cherry Seventh-Best Canadian, and Hrudey on Duty published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv

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amtushinfosolutionspage · 7 years

Text

DGB Grab Bag: New Penalty Signals, Cherry Seventh-Best Canadian, and Hrudey on Duty

The three stars of comedy … will return

We’re taking a break from the three stars this week, since a.) it’s August and everyone who has ever played, coached, or worked in the NHL in their life is off the grid at a cottage somewhere, and b.) I’ve been away most of the week and probably missed anything funny that did happen. The three stars will return next time. Meanwhile, we have important business to get to in the next section.

Be It Resolved

Last week, I got very worked up about the NHL’s weird insistence on treating holding the stick as a different penalty than holding, complete with its own hand signal. To be clear, I stand by that rant completely. I’m right and you know it.

In putting that section together, I had to dive into my copy of the NHL rulebook to verify that holding the stick was in fact the only penalty that forces the referee to perform a two-part signal, and in doing so, I realized something I’d never noticed before: There are four NHL penalties that don’t have a signal at all.

Granted, they’re the rare ones. Specifically, the penalties without signals are kicking, head-butting, throwing equipment, and too-many-men. You don’t see those all that often. Still, they’re in the rulebook. They should have some sort of signal. You can’t ask a referee to announce a penalty and then just stand there like an idiot while everyone stares at him. We need to give these guys something to work with.

So let’s do that. I’ve got some suggestions.

Let’s start with kicking. That’s the easy one. The referee just makes a little kicking motion. Simple enough, right? I mean, it would have to be a distinct kicking motion so that everyone in the crowd could make it out, but I’m sure the league could come up with a nice, easy definition for distinctive kicking motion that everyone would always agree on, so we’ll just use that.

Photo by Isaiah J. Downing-USA TODAY Sports

The head-butt is a little tougher. My first thought was that the ref would slap his own forehead, but older fans might get confused and think he just realized that he could’ve had a V8. So I’m going to go a little more extreme and suggest that he slam his head directly into the crook of his arm. It’s simple, distinctive, and my son will get excited because he’ll think the ref is dabbing. Everyone wins.

For throwing equipment, I think we go with the obvious: The ref has to wind up and toss his whistle into the crowd like it’s the Rock’s elbow pad. And yes, that does create a problem where the referee won’t have a whistle for the rest of the game, but if it’s overtime or late in a close game or the playoffs, he won’t need it anymore, so we should be fine.

Be it resolved: All these new hand signals go into effect for the 2017-18 season. Please let any referees in your life know so they can start practicing now.

Obscure former player of the week

One of this year’s bigger off-season moves was the Stars signing Alexander Radulov away from the Canadiens. Radulov had 54 points last year and occasionally goes into beast mode, so he doesn’t qualify as an obscure player. His brother Igor does, though, so he gets this week’s honors.

Igor Radulov was a winger who was picked by Chicago in the third round of the 2000 draft, four years before his brother would go to Nashville in the first. It was a good round for less-successful brothers, as Henrik Lundqvist’s twin brother Joel had gone a few picks earlier. (Henrik himself wouldn’t go until the seventh round that year, marking the last known time that his life wasn’t completely perfect.)

Anyway, Radulov remained in Russia for a season before heading to North America to spend a year playing for the OHL’s Mississauga IceDogs (and head coach Don Cherry). He scored 33 goals, then moved to the AHL in 2002, where he got his first taste of the pro game. By the end of the year, he earned a brief call-up to Chicago, where he scored five goals in seven games.

While we didn’t know it at the time, we’d seen the last of Igor Radulov in the NHL. He headed home to Russia during the 2004-05 lockout and stayed there, first with HC Spartak Moscow and later with the KHL. Unlike his brother, he never did make an NHL comeback; at 34, he was still seeing time in the KHL last season.

What has Don Cherry gone and done now?

We haven’t used this section much lately, and to be honest, there’s no real reason to break it out now. Don Cherry hasn’t done much this week. He’s on vacation, like everyone else. But since there’s not much going on, I thought it would be fun to use this space to tell the story about the time Cherry was voted the seventh-best Canadian.

Yes, that actually happened.

I realize that American readers are probably wondering how this is possible. How could a country with so much history decide that a sports broadcaster was the seventh greatest person to ever live? That would be like naming John Madden or Vin Scully as one of the ten greatest Americans. They’ve had great careers, and people love them, but greatest ever? Like, out of everyone? Are you crazy?

Meanwhile, Canadian readers are like, “Seventh? Huh. That seems a little low.”

When you are a bright spot in the history of your country. Photo by Charles LeClaire-USA TODAY Sports

Here’s the background. In 2004, the CBC launched a project to determine the greatest Canadian of all time, creatively naming it “The Greatest Canadian.” The end result was a top-50 list, determined by a multi-step public vote.

Cherry ended up finishing seventh, ahead of people like Alexander Graham Bell, Sir John A. Macdonald, and, oh yeah, Wayne Gretzky. He was narrowly beat out by names like Terry Fox, Sir Frederick Banting, and Lester B. Pearson. In case you’re wondering, the winner was Tommy Douglas. If you Americans don’t know who that is, he’s basically the guy who brought Canada the concept of, um, you know what, America, maybe it’s better if we don’t mention it right now. Tommy Douglas is Kiefer Sutherland’s grandfather, that’s all you need to know.

The important point is that Cherry finished seventh, which gives you an idea of how insanely popular he’s always been up here. There was a time when he absolutely could have run for prime minister. Hell, he probably would have won.

By the way, when the CBC program aired, each of the top ten was presented by a Canadian celebrity. Cherry’s segment was introduced by Bret “The Hitman” Hart. Just in case you were ever wondering what the most Canadian thing of all time was.

Classic YouTube clip breakdown

Who’s up for some terrible NHL goaltender-based rap/rock? Good. You’re in luck.

So the background here is that it’s the 1989-90 season, give or take a year, and a group called The Puck Boys has decided to record a song honoring the Kings’ coolest player. No, not Wayne Gretzky. No, not Luc Robitaille. Not Bernie Nicholls, either. Those guys were good, but they didn’t rock a baby blue bandana during games. No, the Puck Boys are going to sing to us about Kelly Hrudey.

To answer the obvious question: No, The Puck Boys are not a real band. They can’t be. I mean, I don’t doubt that at least a few of these guys are actual musicians, and the lead singer is… well, we’ll get to him in a bit. But this is basically a casting call of musical clichés all mashed into one super-group. They can’t possibly be an actual collective. There’s just no way.

All that said, this is a pretty catchy song. You’re going to be humming it all day. Consider yourself warned.

“Who’s between the pipes tonight? Well let me check my roster…” Um, actually, the roster itself wouldn’t have that information. You’d need to check your lineup. Once again, novelty hockey song bands’ failure to hire me as a fact-checker comes back to haunt them.

Glove saves were just better in the 80s and 90s. The goalies always looked a little bit surprised to have actually made a save, and they’d really sell it by flailing their arms around. It always looked great.

OK, almost always.

We get our first wide shot of the entire band, which includes a guy in cowboy hat, a dude in a suit, and a small child. And, of course, there’s our lead singer, who looks like Bruce Springsteen had a baby with Marty Jannetty and then let it be raised by Rico Suave.

Just to give you a sense for the attention to detail that’s going to be in play here, we start off with our singer telling us about all the things they now have “one less” of, while holding up two fingers.

The singer is giving off some star power, but the undisputed star here is keyboard-suit guy. He has clearly a.) never played the keyboard before and b.) not quite got the hang of the whole “having elbows” thing. But he did break out the formal wear for this video shoot, so we’ll give him that. Dress for the job you want, and all that.

This is one of those late-80s songs that would be described as rap but may or may not actually be. I feel like the inclusion “whopper of a stopper” kind of disqualifies it right there.

So about that lead singer. His name is Harry Perzigian, and he’d become famous under some less than ideal circumstances a few years later. He was accused of supplying drugs to the son of actor Carroll O’Connor, who later committed suicide. He later sued O’Connor for slander, and the whole thing was a reasonably big tabloid story at the time. Perzigian died in 2014; a friend wrote this tribute.

I feel like that may have been the most depressing paragraph in YouTube section history. Can we get back to hockey jokes now? I’m not sure we have a choice. Onwards.

“Is this real, we must be dreaming. Have you checked our goals against?” Yes, I have. Kelly Hrudey’s goal against average in 1989-90 was 4.07, the fourth worst mark in the league. But in fairness, he posted a 4.34 in the playoffs.

As we’re digesting that information, our next highlight is an opposing player on a breakaway just getting blatantly tackled before he can get to Hrudey. Probably the right play.

That player is Brent Ashton, by the way, and he’s going to feature in like every one of these highlights. Seriously, it’s all they have and it’s going to get weird.

“It’s 7:30, I’m OK,” our singer tells us while pointing at his wrist, which does not have a watch on it. This guy is terrible at hand gestures. Working the name of the song into the wardrobe is a strength, sure, but hand gestures not so much.

We get our second identical shot of Hrudey decking Paul MacDermid. And with that, we’ve made it through our entire video while using highlights from one single NHL game. Come on, guys. Even the Neil Sheehy-era Capitals know you always use two or three to mix it up.

And because I know you expect me to know these things, I went back and tried to figure out which specific game all these highlights are from. We knew the Kings were playing the Jets in L.A. (home teams wore white back then), Kelly Hrudey was in net, Brent Ashton and Paul MacDermid are in the lineup, and the Kings won (since we see Hrudey pumping his fist at the end of the game). The only game from 1988-89 or 1989-90 that fits that criteria came on December 19, 1989, when Hrudey gave up five goals in a 9-5 Kings win. Wayne Gretzky had six points. Are you sure the goalie’s the guy you want to be highlighting on this team, guys?

I don’t think that’s the kid’s real voice, you guys.

Have a question, suggestion, old YouTube clip, or anything else you’d like to see included in this column? Email Sean at [email protected]. DGB Grab Bag: New Penalty Signals, Cherry Seventh-Best Canadian, and Hrudey on Duty syndicated from http://ift.tt/2ug2Ns6

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flauntpage · 7 years

Text

DGB Grab Bag: New Penalty Signals, Cherry Seventh-Best Canadian, and Hrudey on Duty

The three stars of comedy … will return

Be It Resolved

So let's do that. I've got some suggestions.

Photo by Isaiah J. Downing-USA TODAY Sports

Be it resolved: All these new hand signals go into effect for the 2017-18 season. Please let any referees in your life know so they can start practicing now.

Obscure former player of the week

What has Don Cherry gone and done now?

Yes, that actually happened.

Meanwhile, Canadian readers are like, "Seventh? Huh. That seems a little low."

When you are a bright spot in the history of your country. Photo by Charles LeClaire-USA TODAY Sports

Classic YouTube clip breakdown

Who's up for some terrible NHL goaltender-based rap/rock? Good. You're in luck.

All that said, this is a pretty catchy song. You're going to be humming it all day. Consider yourself warned.

OK, almost always.

This is one of those late-80s songs that would be described as rap but may or may not actually be. I feel like the inclusion "whopper of a stopper" kind of disqualifies it right there.

I feel like that may have been the most depressing paragraph in YouTube section history. Can we get back to hockey jokes now? I'm not sure we have a choice. Onwards.

As we're digesting that information, our next highlight is an opposing player on a breakaway just getting blatantly tackled before he can get to Hrudey. Probably the right play.

That player is Brent Ashton, by the way, and he's going to feature in like every one of these highlights. Seriously, it's all they have and it's going to get weird.

I don't think that's the kid's real voice, you guys.

0 notes