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ashsostrange · 5 months

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"averagegirlie" is just "xxoxobree", formerly known as "breeandhermunches" on a burner. newsflash, your "fav" miles writer isn't who you think she is!

ik a lot of us must be VERY confused so let me help you out. @/averagegirlie and @/xxoxobree are the same mfkn person! why did bree make this account? i assume that it's so she could fend for herself and keep the "unbothered" act up on her main page. that's why she deletes all her reblogs after arguing w someone then comes over to this account to start bsing. not to mention she can say extremely problematic things with no repercussions, because she doesn't have a following on that page + it's not tied to her.. at least it wasn't before! bree's a very messy liar. i peeped the truth so lemme share it w y'all.

bree if you're seeing this, go take a couple shots before you read. you should've kept it cute but you didn't, so let's get nasty mf.

i have receipts! let's start right here cz i find this the funniest:

nobody but her spells "internet" like that... this is one of the many examples of the two accounts talking alike, even though bree said she wouldn't refer to "yao" as a friend when the whole rashad thing was going down. yesterday, i reminded yao of that. she said "i like bree, so what" but she deleted that and changed it to "when are y'all gonna catch on to the fact that we talk?" mhm.. bree's a lil confused, but next!

y'all see "yao's" tag? telling alexa to play some bs... then y'all see bree?? NEXT!

go look on miss average's page. she only comes online to defend and ride the hell out of bree's dick. remember ts w amani? why are you going so hard for someone who says they dk you like that LMFAO. not to mention, when the rashad shit was happening, bree said "this my girl and she never been wrong" but then she turns around and says "i wouldn't say we're friends" WHICH ONE IS IT MISS MUNCH??! 😭🤣🤣 next!

why we praising tf out of bree's oc? ts was ai bro. we got a self supafan. next...

look at this smart anon, putting tg the pieces and shit. "ash and dalia fight your battles every time" is literally.. a lie. what battles are we referring to? talia's never in drama as much as you're implying. and ima ride for my friends anyway, tf? but my entire blog will never be centered around ONE human being. it ain't that serious ever. "yao" and bree need hobbies cz writing obv ain't doing it for her. next.

bree has also said she's messy lol. she likes drama. hm!

look at how she came on her white horse when bree was battling the great war w anons over miles morales smut (which i don't fw, js to be clear.) who summoned her? BREE LMFAIOFHDGFKJAS... NEXT!!!

here's miss xxoxo munches being ableist, much like her alter ego. bro went silent and blocked lia after this. now let's get into miss average again.

look at this bs. ion even gotta say much.. this girl is black & not chinese!! y'all should know why this is weird. here's the "evidence" she gave me btw:

here's me proving her wrong! she tried! next.

y'all see the way they're tagging their posts w their usernames? mhm.. ik you do.

HMMM....

these are both bree. i don't mean to bring up maye again, but i have to for context. what happened wasn't js "drama"... the things she said to dalia were racist + that post she was lyin' about lia in. she also liked the post.. dead giveaway you silly bitch! 🥱 nd she was also instigating in honey's inbox. i know her typing style and her emoji colors lol. it's common sense atp. it's not hard to tell when an anon is bree. and from what i'm seeing not even maye is fw her.. LMFAISAIDHSAY GIRL YOU'RE DONE! 😭 feel free to go thru their accs, you'll see ts too. she's funny asf for this, i'll give her that and that only. i've never laughed so much in under 24 hours. 💓

in conclusion, bree is messy, bored, insecure, ableist & miserable! she thought nobody would ever find out but here we are today. she fronts not gaf but then switches to this acc to let off some serious steam... as miss freeman once said: "Alexa, play yikes!"

but bless bree 💗 maybe if you change now, you'll still be able to collect your tokens like dalia says.

#ash spills 💋#the downfall of her munches #fucked around and found out!#miles morales x reader #e42miles morales x reader #beware of the munch #breeisoverparty

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cathedraldecay · 2 years

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how to navigate archived mcr sites and content

so i accidentally deleted an ask that asked how to find and navigate archived mcr sites and content through the wayback machine. i'm so sorry to whoever that was, i'll reblog this multiple times so hopefullyy they see it.

here are a some recommendations, as well as a guide and some tips i put together. it's kinda long so i put it below the cut.

first of all, i wanted to mention that you can find archived stuff anywhere online, not just through the wayback machine. there's some cool archived content on the general archive.org site, or videos on vimeo. also just anywhere online. you can also find a lot of cool stuff on here through blogs that organize stuff by archive, history, or year tags. i've found a lot by searching for archives in the tumblr search bar (i recommend this mcr merch archive.) if you set out searching for stuff, you'll eventually find something.

now, here's tips on the wayback machine:

sites i recommend: - www.mychemicalromance.com (of course. go through the dif looks thru the years) - www.imnotokay.net (you don't really need the wayback machine for this because it's still up, but it's fun to see what it was like back in 06-07. there are hundreds of pages of message boards, and tons of photos, there's endless exploring on here because you can find old photos, interviews, avatars, and more in posts) - http://www.mychemicalromance.com:80/gimage/ (photos from their official site in 04. **tips on how to navigate below.) - http://www.chimehosting.com/prod4ever/mcr/gallery/fanfotos/ (fan submitted photos from their official site in 06. **tips on how to navigate below.)

STARTING OUT: vague searches: - you can just put "my chemical romance" or whatever you're looking for in the search bar and look through the results. this'll give you a lot of results, but the stuff at the top of the page will probably work best. - when looking through these search results, when you select one don't click the URL link, click the option below that says "[number] capture(s)". this'll send you to a calendar which is much easier to navigate. if you do click the URL link, it just goes to the most recent capture. this is annoying on the official mcr site because it currently redirects you to a promo for foundations. just use the calendar, it's so much easier. - also in the search results, under the URL it'll have a picture icon and says how many pictures are on the site. if you click that, it'll give you a list of URLs of pictures. most of them will be from the website design, but you can find other photos on there as well. there are also results for audio and video, but those are more uncommon. URL searches: - you can also paste a URL into the search bar and look through more specific results. - when pasting a link that just ends with .com or .net with no add ons, it'll take you to a calendar. there you select a year, hover over the date, and select a snapshot you want to visit. - **if you go through photos on the official site, most of them won't work. the URLs i added above make it so the only results are the ones that work. - **paste the photo links into the search bar, make sure it's on the "URL's" tab, then just go through them. it might tell you that site isn't archived, if it does, just click the link it gives you to search for all archived pages under the URL. - **the first photo URL gives you about 20 results, the second around 60. - **when clicking through those photos, i usually right click, open in new tab, then when it opens up a calendar i just click the earliest date.

!!!if a site isn't working, just select different snapshots along the timeline at the top of the page, or use the arrows by the date to click through them!!!

OTHER NAVIGATION TIPS: - some sites will have a picture you have to click on which will then take you to the actual site. it's like this on the mcr official site in its earlier years (i didn't realize this and thought the site wasn't working lol). - unless you have an archived version of flash installed on your computer, flash sites won't work. if a website gives you an option between flash and HTML, choose HTML. it does this on the mcr official site from like 04-07.

MCR OFFICIAL SITE TIPS: - if you go through photos on the official site, most of them won't work. the URLs i added above make it so the only results are the ones that work. - on the home page from like 02-04 there's a feed of updates written by the band that you can read through. it's really interesting and you can find stuff like scrapped song titles from three cheers. there are also downloads for audio recordings made by the band as updates, which i unfortunately can't get to work. if anyone knows how to, please let me know!

i'd say start with the official site, then go through fansites and stuff. also, if you share things, link the source! i can get lost in this for days, but it can be a pain in the ass to navigate. it's a lot of going through snapshots until one works, and it can take a while to load, but the wayback machine is very easy to navigate so it's not too bad. i think it's worth it, i've found a lot of cool stuff. i can't think of anything else, so let me know if you have any questions!! i hope this helps!

#it can seem complicated but its actually really easy #i think finding the right sites is the hard part #i tried to make this beginner friendly so thats why its kinda long #if it was you who sent the ask maybe leave a comment to let me know you saw it #i have absolutely no idea how i deleted it :/#mcr #my chemical romance #archive #the wayback machine #web archive #asks

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jadedaceofspades · 8 months

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Hey follow up because I'm weird like that.

Great. Good. Not the depressive part, but the letting go part. Please shout. Please yell. That's like, I don't know, a load of fly larvae coagulating inside your body like that one science experiment I did in elementary school with the rotten egg. A lot in life is rotten eggs. There's gonna be fly larvae from who knows where feeding off of it, and they're tiny and buzzing and not pleasant to keep like a pocket warmer that's alive and wants out of its casing and it's not rice inside but fly larvae, so it's got to be thrown out. You gotta toss it. Maybe you liked it once because it had been rice or you didn't know it was flies and it was just in your pants one day or whatever, this is incoherent, but the flies have got to go. They've got to go, and flies are never present and it's disconcerting to see so many just blow out of an unassuming pant pocket, but that's just life sometimes. The flies gotta go. Do what you've gotta to get rid of them.

Very incoherent analogy, but I'm out of it, but I want to ramble.

So I saw your post about CoD and some other things that are in that burst reblog chain I just went thru because vibes and same and all that. And I just thought it was nice. Saw you like the Makarov thing I reblogged. I'm going down a rabbit hole with one of the newer characters, that Phillip Graves guy. I got Southern Charmed by another evil fictional CEO. That keeps happening. I've noticed a pattern from Augustus Sinclair in Bioshock, and I know it started from Fallout New Vegas, which brings me to my next piece.

For some inexplicable reason, I find the 'problematic' fandoms neat. I mean the shit where obviously the subject matter of the media isn't for kids. The modern 12 yr old should not be playing Spec Ops The Line or know who Andrew Ryan is. Characters are assholes, stories are bleak and don't apologize and shit and I think that's...nice. Like no one in the actual material pretends that they're a good person, or if they do, the game doesn't pretend they're a good person. The moral is what you make and all that shit. And shit's problematic. And, excluding Fallout's portrayal of indigenous people and the racism inherent across the material I indulge in all together, I find that the whole basis of them being so "icky" for a younger audience, or at least that's how my brain rationalizes it, makes it safer for me to indulge in. Because I won't find so many rabid antis or kids in general to tiptoe around. And even if I do, they're kids who are aware they're not supposed to be here in my space and are aware of themselves enough to know there's just some shit they shouldn't see and that that is their problem, not mine.

Maybe it's the fact that I've always felt wrong. Like I'm not natural to the species of human I've grown up around and amidst. And it's not just the 'emo' kind of otherness. I'm a Muslim who doesn't wear a veil and is open at the fact that sometimes my religion is questionable at best and rancid at worst. I'm an Asian in an Asian country who thinks her male cousin should be allowed the purple butterfly bag tag as a kid's meal toy choice and have to make excuses as to why that is, citing the history of the colour purple being traced back to European royalty for it to be novel enough for an answer. I feel like, sometimes, I might contaminate whatever younger generation is around me simply for existing. I'm trying to be better, but that feeling of wrongness will always be there, popping up in the presence of others who might still have a chance, who aren't wrong like me, who are normal.

And it's nice to be able to fall back on a space where, even if I am rancid, I won't be contaminating the little children if I so happen to like the same things as them. Fallout New Vegas isn't a hot new thing. Bioshock is a quiet, stagnant shell of a firecracker that goes off only occasionally, but not enough to attract the hoards that come to TF2, for example, its release year peer that shoots up whenever Overwatch chokes itself on a banana. Current 12yrs aren't playing Spec Ops The Line. The circus of my interest is contained to other monsters like me, who the little children will ignore, by virtue of our tent being so unappealing to them or overshadowed by grander other things that are current and important and don't involve war crimes for shallow, sometimes even out of touch PSAs other media following it has done better.

And then I paint myself in the sort of shit they'd be appalled by, languish in the mud pit of these immoral things, out of spite. I'm currently hashing out a fic that might get me cancelled if it were written for Steven Universe. Death threats from the Owl House, or even from Hazbin Hotel somehow. But no, I'm writing it for Bioshock and New Vegas and my blorbos are disgusting old men most would be happy about living terrible lives if they existed in real life, which is the metric of measurement used by those outside the cesspit. I'm safe in that my space is a mud pit and mud is not unexpected.

Is this pretentious? Oh yes. This entire thing. Is pretentious. Is it unhealthy? Most likely. But it's...nice. It is pleasant.

I may have wasted your time. Call of Duty is a passing pleasure at the moment and my Southern Charmer is unfortunately, by his own purposeful merit, not a fan favorite so I am wallowing. He's my little skrunkly for the moment. Did you play the original games? What was the fandom climate like in the ye olden youth of its age? CoD is cited as the boost for a lit of things in gaming history. Booster of gaming from its niche hidey hole in the back alleys of subculture, some might say.

Have a good one and have some ice cream. This was weird. Good night.

Ramble away, I don't mind lol

The things with certain fandoms for me is that... Like, once I find "my people", I'm okay, but like... can't do that if I don't talk to people, but with the Ghost fandom, especially, it was almost like if you weren't a part of a group in the fandom, you were never talked to. Like, ever. And that sucked because there are more people to talk to beside the 5 people in your circle when there are thousands and thousands of other fans.

And when it comes to "problematic" fandoms... I really, REALLY enjoy the media that the fandom is immersed into; like Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, and others. And in these fandoms I meet all types of people and I do try to participate with headcanons and such, but like... sometimes the rotten apples of the fandoms make me psychotic and I just know I have to leave for a bit and then come back when shit dies down because... Yeah, it won't be good for me. +

I never played any of the games because I don't have any of the systems, but I'll watch the "cut scene movies" on YouTube.

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amariemelody · 1 year

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I posted 8,617 times in 2022

114 posts created (1%)

8,503 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@secretlystephaniebrown

@writeroffates

@miss-jayjayy

@fleur-aesthetic

@fyblackwomenart

I tagged 8,616 of my posts in 2022

#queue queue go go - 1,981 posts

#food tw - 801 posts

#photography - 704 posts

#star wars - 600 posts

#flowers - 594 posts

#black girl art - 469 posts

#videos - 427 posts

#the mandalorian - 391 posts

#flashing lights tw - 386 posts

#-squee!!- - 379 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#this movie just...brought me so much comfort during a horrific year of my life (2018) and i didn't even know chad had cancer the whole time.

My Top Posts in 2022:

Ya’ll, I’m...really proud of myself today? I can finally re-watch Black Panther. Today is the first time I managed to do it, to even look at the DVD case ever since He died and I’m just...

My god, I’m tearing up just a little but I’m thinking I can watch it again.

36 notes - Posted February 26, 2022

Guys, guys, guys, guys...

Going to my first-ever Pride parade tomorrow! Incognito!!

Omfggg, I am a quietly excited bisexual!! I wonder if during one of our breaks...I can find and snag a bi flag item from one of the vendors while pretending I don’t know what it is /what it means and that I just like the colors. And I mean, I do love my flag’s colors, so maybe that’ll fly...

Hmmm...

37 notes - Posted June 24, 2022

As much as it’s an absolute bop, I think the song “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” in the movie Encanto carries a symbolic choice in its wording that goes beyond its catchiness.

Even before you learn the full situation of Bruno’s absence from the family, you get half the picture thru the song: Bruno’s power of clairvoyance was Inconvenient To The Family And Village, But Especially To Abuela Alma and so...he had to go.

It’s interesting that the song isn’t titled, say, “Where Is Bruno?” or “Don’t Come Back, Bruno” or even just “We Don’t Know Where Bruno Is”.

No, the song title is an assertion that the subject of Bruno is one we simply do not broach.

A huge, huge theme in Encanto is generational trauma. And one of the perpetual curses of generational trauma is We Don’t Talk About X. Sometimes X is something that hurts us (i.e, Bruno’s visions and other seemingly odd behaviors) and/or X is something that we did to hurt someone else (i.e, the family and village’s continual rejection and depreciation of Bruno to the point where he left and never came back).

Thus we get “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”.

The overall policy of not talking about...what needs to be talked about is often how generational trauma is not only created to begin with, but also how it is allowed to continue through new generation after generation with very little end in sight.

Not talking about things is often thought of as a way to not only avoid The Problem(s), but to deny there are The Problem(s). It’s almost a childish way of thinking that if we don’t acknowledge it then it doesn’t/can’t/won’t hurt and will somehow magically (haha) go away and stay away. And of course that never works; The Problem(s) must be dealt with or else The Problem(s) will deal with you.

And I’m not preaching from the pulpit about this-I’ve never even been to Colombia but like a lot of people I relate so much to Encanto because my family suffers from generational trauma too. Starting from my own mother (and her devil of a mother before her), there have been many things that are swept under the rug and quite a few have exploded until they needed to be dealt with...and sometimes it’s been too long that an apology/gradual change in behavior wasn’t fully enough to mend the “cracks” in our own casita, y’know?

The Problem doesn’t go away-it just festers and festers until it deals with you.

And The Problem not going away is amazingly symbolized in the song “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”. We see that, actually...Bruno truly hasn’t gone away. During Dolores’ dope ass verse, you can see his greenish shadow in the background on the balcony, not unlike as though he were a specter; in Camilo’s equally dope ass verse, Camilo still remembers enough about what his uncle looks like to transform into him (minus the exaggerated “7 foot frame”-he seems hardly taller than Mirabel herself); both Isabela and Dolores still remember positive prophecies from him, one about growth in power and one about future true love; so many of the villagers still remember much less positive prophecies from him; and his room is still present in the house, never mind that it’s off limits.

Not Talking About Bruno does not at all mean Bruno has gone away.

Even greater than what Bruno’s continued presence means, there’s also what his continued implicit absence means. Alongside her siblings and cousins, Mirabel has been deprived of having such a selfless, loving uncle in her life who, in leaving, did what he thought best to put her before himself even while knowing she’d never be aware of his sacrifice; Julieta and Pepa have been deprived of their only brother; and Abuela Alma has been deprived of her only son. That continued absence is yet another Problem.

Also not talking about Bruno is really not unlike how the family deals with Mirabel, whose continued visible presence with her ordinary lack of magical powers they cannot escape/erase. That is, the songwriters could easily write a song titled, “We Don’t Talk To Mirabel”.

From what I see, Abuela Alma certainly goes out of her way to not talk to Mirabel unless it’s within 1 of 3 contexts:

Why are you in my direct line of sight and, whatever reason you (quickly) give, wrap it up so that you’re properly out of my sight.

What are you doing and, whatever you (quickly) tell me you are doing, wrap it up so you’re not reminding me that you’re The Problem.

Please remember the best thing you can do for the family and specifically me is to Be Seen, Not Heard.

I and a whole lot of audience of course see this as insidiously but extremely cruel from Abuela Alma to her own flesh-and-blood granddaughter. In its insidiousness, in the narrative we also Don’t Talk About The Effects This Has On Mirabel, i.e, her terribly low self-esteem and high frustration/resentment; her trauma at the constant exclusion and depreciation; and her powerful, pressurizing need to prove herself worthy. To prove herself even present.

Now I will say that...I don’t feel like a whole lot of the family follows Abuela’s example on how to treat Mirabel. Certainly her parents protect and nurture their daughter as much as they can against their matriarch’s mistreatment of her. Her 3 cousins are certainly loving enough to her in my opinion, particularly Antonio (and I want to write a whole post on his representation sometime, too!), and you get the sense that if Luisa had more time she’d dote on and nurture her baby sister much, much more.

Isabela is the only one who seems to be the worst offender.For example, after it’s announced in the song that Mariano, Isabela’s betrothed, and his mother are on his way, Isabela sings an interesting line to Mirabel:

“Hey, sis, I want not a sound out of you”

...Which is pretty in line with Abuela Alma’s standard cruel treatment and policy with Mirabel: Be Seen, Not Heard And You Won’t Be The Problem.

(And on a side note, I’m 1000% of the mind that Mariano would be an excellent big brother-in-law and be so loving and nurturing to Mirabel. I don’t think he would’ve found her comparative ordinariness an issue at all.)

(Another, another side note: I’m also of the mind that Isabela’s initial copying of Abuela Alma’s treatment of Mirabel is a kind of rebound envy and resentment because while Mirabel can’t grab just some spotlight no matter how hard she tries, Isabela can’t ever get out of all the spotlight no matter how hard she tries. I think it’s inverse brands of spotlight pressures going in different directions with the resentments...well, going in the wrong directions.)

Going back to Bruno and the song title “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”, that curse of generational trauma doesn’t start to break itself until, well...we talk about Bruno. And there’s a short, but explicit line Camilo and Antonio in the song “All of You” that states as much:

“Okay, so we’re gonna talk about Bruno? (That’s Bruno)

Yeah, there’s a lot to say about Bruno

For sure there’s a lot of things to say about Bruno-and I love, love, love that Bruno is able to (re)claim in his agency in the narrative by being able to explain himself in his own verse right after the above one.

Not only are we going to talk about Bruno, but Bruno gets to be the one to talk.

See the full post

43 notes - Posted January 11, 2022

Guess who’s starting SWIMMING LESSONS next week?!?!?!?!?!?!!

52 notes - Posted October 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

See, every time late May comes around...

I know at worst it’s corporate predation and at best it’s corporate cynical performance of allyship/activism to snag the queer dollar, but...

Come every late May when I see the rainbow colors of Pride come out over stores’ banners online and stores’ displays right inside their front windows where everyone can see and stores’ displays inside the store where it’s easily seen and accessible by everyone, instead of shamefully tucked into a back corner...

When I see that, there’s a happy whisper in my mind.

It’s still a whispered secret for me that I am bisexual-in real life, I have still not come out to anyone. I am content with that for now. I don’t see that contentment changing any time in the near future. But I was 25 when I quietly, definitively said to myself that I am bisexual. I was 28 when I came out only online, first to a slew of fellow, older LGBT friends that I implicitly trusted and then later on openly on my blog as a Christmas present to myself.

I carry a quiet love and pride of my bisexuality. And so when I see the Pride colors, that happy whisper in my mind goes, “That’s you, kid. Those colors mean you. You’re a colorful person and those colors belong to you, too.”

“You made it another year, kid. Happy birthday to learning yet another beautiful part of you.”

75 notes - Posted May 30, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #So...so much FOOD and flowers this time around huh?!#Amarie talks #Long post

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tired-inyxe · 3 months

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WHATS UP FUCKS - AKA My Ultimate Masterpost

Hi! I realized I never really introduced myself. My name is Inyxe (i-n-y-x-e, pronounced like Lynx but with an i (accidentally swapped the y and n once and didn't notice until it was too late)), but you can also call me Jay! I'm a proud anarchist and punk, swear like a sailor and love sharing my opinions well knowing I won't be hunted down with pitchforks and torches (I mean I could still be here but it's not as likely as, let's say, twitter). I've only been here for a couple of years but this is basically my first social media platform (Amino doesn't count). I also was put through the shredder when I was created and have a slew of issues, both mental and physical, so you will be subjected to the whims of my brainworms. It/they/fae pronouns. I have no sidebloggs so you get a smattering of my thoughts, have fun~ Feel free to dm or ask me anything! I may be so so tired but I like human interaction as long as I don't initiate it. Expect me to talk about prehistoric animals tho This will most likely be edited later, but that's future me's problem All of my tag masterlists! I have a lotta custom tags, like a LOT, so if u see weird ass tags on me post it's probably related to these (also useful for digging thru my stuff!)

General -my basic bitch tags, tag is #wing anatomy (subject to change)

Writing/Character Work -my creative writing/character work tags, tag is #worm anatomy Art -my art tags, tag is #cake anatomy Batfam/Dc -my batfam/dc tags, tag is #bat anatomy TMNT -my TMNT tags, tag is #shell anatomy more will be added later, i do more stuff than these after all, like dinosaurs! (fossil anatomy) My most important tags (on here and in the masterlist they best fit)

#bird anatomy -this masterpost! so its easy to find if i mention it in a different post

#og munchies -original posts

#eagle screech -announcements relating to me #red velvet cookie -my favorite things I've made/stuff im really proud of! I make a killer red velvet cookie batch fyi

#homemade food -My art! Get it well its hot #worm sculptures -my ocs! Also known as the worms that haunt nobodies head but mine (might introduce em soon ooooo) #rebloop -reblog

Extra info under the cut! has discussion of my mental/physical disorders so if u dont like that feel free to skip dw (I love to overexplain the stuff under here isn't important)

Stuff I have (been diagnosed for all of these, but that doesn't rly matter, just saying that because I don't want to deal w self diagnosis discourse atm): Autism, Adhd, Depression, Anxiety, Gender Dysphoria and Insomnia Stuff I suspect (talkin w me doctor abt it maybe): Tachycardia, depersonalization/derealization disorder, chronic fatigue, possibly a lung condition (not asthma but my lungs are fucked), iron deficiency anemia, some other vitamin/mineral deficiencies most likely, panic disorder, OCD, uhhhh idk ill add more later? maybe. its 1am my brain slidey yeah m doing this when m more awake gah

#bird anatomy #so eepy #i'll see how i feel abt this later #gonna sleep #mhhhhhhhh

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0junemeatcleaver0 · 3 months

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I saw you wanted anons so I came to ask how you deal with drama in the fandom? Have you ever had hate and how do you mentally disassociate from it any advice?

I don't know that I really have advice, honestly. Because like...I just innately don't care?? I find being willing to go to war over fictional characters to be one of the saddest ways a person could choose to spend their time. So whenever I've come into contact with someone willing to make a fool out of themselves in front of god and everybody off the back of some motherfuckers who don't even exist...I either point and laugh or just feel bad for them, depending on what my mood is in that moment.

I've gotten some hate, sure. I mostly delete any shitty anons. You can block anons, you know. Which I highly suggest doing. I've had people screenshot my posts and write screeds below without tagging me, which is always funny. There's some guy out there who (from the word of other anons who've come to me) is still very very mad at me because I was one of maybe three people who ever told him to stfu and I did it publicly. He treated his friend group like shit (again, second hand knowledge, heard thru the grapevine, take with a pinch of salt), and left fandom/deleted his blog. Came back, blocked me probably first thing, continued doing (from what I've heard) the same bullshit I called him out for and is still apparently making posts about me??

All of the above is so deeply unserious that I cannot imagine a world in which I would care enough about it to do anything other than laugh. Like...what about any of that warrants any amount of sincerity?

The only time I've been affected by any *~fandom drama~* is when this dude I used to be pals with ended up being a real fuckin' misogynist who only cared about causes that directly affected him, pretended to care about what I (and our mutual friends) were saying/going through, and would like...vague post people he claimed were his friends?? While misgendering any AFAB he didn't like?? All very stupid, juvenile interpersonal behavior on top of the regular fandom bullshit of "you can only like blorbo the way I like blorbo or you're wrong and bad".

And like, that sucked. It sucked to realize what was going on, and to realize that I 'lost' a 'friend'. But even then, after about a month I was more or less over it--realizing that I didn't lose a friend, I just lost the illusion of who I thought that guy was. Who I thought that guy was never existed in the first place, so I didn't actually lose anything. The only time I think about him now is if he gets reblogged onto my dash and even then, all I think about is the fact that there still like, a handful of women he hangs out with. And my thoughts are more on them and how I hope that when they 'step out of line' (in his mind) and he gets bitchy with them that they don't take it as hard as some of our mutual friends did.

I dunno. I don't have advice outside of just like...sometimes all you can do is point and laugh. Not publicly, let's not be bullies. But like, talking shit between friends or just chuckling softly to yourself before you hit block is like. Fine. It's fine to do that. It doesn't have to be any deeper than that.

#talk hard

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cheshire-castle-library · 1 year

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Alice in wonderland: 'If you don't know where you want to go, then it doesn't matter which path you take.'

Agreed, we don't know how to live.

We're all unique snowflakes, but I think divorce & drugs & alcohol exists so we can try to calm down from all the anger & rage we feel when we can't get what we want, or the way we want to be treated or remembered.

Essentially if anger is as murder, Hell is basic entry level for everyone—so if GOD sent HIS SON to die on the cross in our place to avoid this Hell & lead us thru life by HIS HOLY SPIRIT; & HE says there is only 1-way forward & JESUS is the way/truth/life, that no one comes to the FATHER except thru JESUS. [John 14:6]

Why in the world would we ever avoid HIS easy yoke? Why wouldn't we ask HIM in to show us the way?

We clearly don't have life/truth/way to GOD, unless we accept JESUS, life/death begins forever after we're ejected from earth.

I wonder if you were to die in your sleep suddenly: Are you ready to be drop-kicked into eternity?

I'm.... deeply confused what I reblogged that earned me this??

I don't think using the words of a suspected/known pedo is going to add to your morality/evangelistic argument. I love Alice in Wonderland too, but it's not a good way to avoid buckshot in your argument from people who don't want to hear it

I don't entirely disagree - reading between the lines and rhetoric, I think your argument is about free choice. And I agree, all humans have free will - that's the whole thing about Lucifer being god's right hand and basically going to rule in hell because he stole free choice which the angels didn't have. (Also, neat thing: if free choice/will is what separates us from the angels, and the angels were perfect beings, it meant that free will is what makes us imperfect beings. Idk what you wanna do with that, but I just think its neat)

I don't think anger is murder. There are good reasons to be angry and ways to be angry that don't take someone's life, and don't take away someone else's free will. But this paragraph... the logic doesn't really follow easily. You may want to rethink it and reword it, because I'm not really sure what you're punching at there.

Not sure why you think I don't believe in God, I don't really talk about my faith in more than obliques and what I tag posts. But I was made this way, and I'm not one who accepts a yoke without being beaten down. That's the way God made me, and it's gotten me pretty far. I also don't think God makes mistakes when he makes things/people, so I'm the way I'm supposed to be. Accepting myself for who I am, while accepting the things I can learn to be better about is kind of the best way I can honor our creator/maker/the divine/etc.

Are you threatening me?? It really sounds like you want something bad to happen to me in the night ^^; But in all honesty, yeah. I'm okay with dying, and where I'll land in whatever afterlife there may be. I don't pretend to know what is waiting in the next life, but I'll accept it whatever it may be. I've been true to myself and I came to terms with death a long time ago. What should I be afraid of if I have faith and I'm comfortable with the way I've lived? I know I've left more good than i've left bad in the world, and that's enough for me.

Also, if this is what you are doing for Lent, you might need to consider what lent is about. I'm ready to say no to little evils, I've done it before, and I do believe that participating in Lent has in many ways trained me for that. I think you should spend some time soul searching and decide some things for yourself.

I for one am not going to explain my faith on the internet. I'm not going to judge other peoples' faiths either. We are imperfect beings, and therefore we have no right to judge. I'm also not going to internalize or change based off of an unsolicited anon. I don't think anyone should.

I hope you find peace, and you figure out what about me being myself in my own little space in this virtual community scared/hurt/confused you so much to send this. And if this is honestly what you feel is right, then thank you for spending the time to do it. It's a hard world to make a stand in right now. But please rest easy knowing that I don't need saving, I have faith in things greater than. I recognize that I am small in the grand machine, and I'm grateful for this reminding me of that - it's so easy sometimes to get caught up in the things that scare us and forget that there's larger mechanization that have been going long before we were born, and will continue to go long after we die.

Have peace, Anon.

#faith #anon #seriously what the heck is this??

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r1ku · 3 years

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💜Update Plans💜

Taking a page from @housewifefemme

Hello! It's been a while, I'm mostly playing Genshin Impact, Obey Me SWD and on Twitter, but I KNOW some artists are tumblr only and I want to see those arts too. I'm trying to get back here more often.

I've changed my mind and soon I'll edit my descriptions on all my blogs. But for now, I'm coming back to posting everything on main.

You see, I've making r1ku into a fandom only + personal interests blog, like kingdom hearts and some manga and anime and bunnies.

And my sideblog pink4walls into the aesthetic and ideas and inspo blog; with scenery, greenery, fashion, food, architecture etc.

But now I have decided to split it more and put back the scenery, fashion, advice, and meta to r1ku and make pink4walls purely into, creative tips, art refs and art tips only.

But whatever I already reblogged just stays, I'll try to tag everything eventually. So, now I'm actively trying to rush myself to push out more reblogs and have 0 drafts in both blogs. Hopefully this splitting will make everything faster.

And I can finally just scroll here and be up to date with current events, and find blogs of my newer interests.

↓ A Question I think some people will have ↓

WHY AM I SEEING AN OLD REBLOG? DID YOU DIG THRU MY BLOG?

When I wanted a fresh start because I had a lot of friendships falling out and I didn't like knowing an old friend blocked me. I remade a new account, and I blocked them, so they dont know me and idk them either now, as it's in the hundreds of blocked accounts lmao.

I made a sideblog and put a lot of posts I wanted to reblog but didn't want to use that account to reblog for, into the sideblogs' drafts. It accumulated into around 29k posts.

I then had a friend become an admin on the sideblog and gave her the sideblog to hold onto and removed myself from the sideblog. I remade into r1ku, and I became an admin on that sideblog and she removed ownership and gave it back to me. So I have my sideblog of drafted reblogs as pink4walls.

And that's where we are now, I have been trying to queue 30 posts a day for both blogs and queue up to 150 posts on both blogs. But the consistency and dedication was hard for me to keep up with, so I'd be gone from tumblr months a time due to procrastination.

But slowly and surely I try to distribute and i whittled down the 29k to 24k as we can see here.

So it's progress guys. But there's a lot of old shit in there. So I apologize if you, the reader who wonders why their old post was reblogged, sees it, it's because it was in my drafts.

Thank you for reading!

Tl;dr

Your post was in my drafts, and Im reblogging as much as I can to get rid of it from my drafts and bring drafts to 0.

-Stef 💜💃

#stef says stuff #update august 2021 #no pin for pink4walls

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maxemilianverstappen · 3 years

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hi! just wanna tell you that i’ve been on f1blr for nearly two months and i wish i had followed you sooner!! i’ve not been around here for long but i’ve been a fan of kimi’s all my life, and it really surprised me how people here are just mean towards him... i actually went on an unfollow spree today, getting rid of people who only posted about him now to fake sorrow. all in all, i love your blog, i wish had followed you sooner and let’s keep together in these hard times!! sending love 💕💕

(oh my f1 blog is @inchident and i can’t figure out how to send asks from there)

Ohh, hello! If @inchident is your sideblog you can't send asks from it on mobile app. I don't know if the situation is the same on desktop, too, but I never tried.

About Kimi.... The hate against him has always been deep and present before 2020, especially rampant among Sebastian fans who loved to stick some of the blame of Seb being unable to win a WDC for Ferrari on Kimi. Much like what Valtteri has been getting for two years. But aside from that, there was a "merchandise" contraversy starting from mid 2020 to the start of this year when he finally changed the design he has been using. And that caused people's hate to concentrate on him for some time until everyone either black listed his name or outright blocked everyone who still posted about him.

I and a few other Kimi blogs got bullied into deleting our blogs, some old Kimi bloggers turned into his no1 haters, most people were coming to his tag to weekly shit on him and make fun of his fans, some people even wishing him to crash and die because he didn't kneel, because of his merc...

Lots of stuff that I don't want to detail, but you can easily find all these posts and why people hate on him so much thru the tag.

I have never defended his choices about certain stuff that he had done to cause this hate, I wish he had done different, I wish he had been more aware of stuff and act accordingly. But I also believed he is a good man at heart just like everyone who knows him has said again and again, including Seb and Charles. But he is also ignorant (doesn't read much/isn't trying to inform himself much) and he doesn't care about what other people think of him. He just does his thing, minds his own business and goes home. For most people being and staying "ignorant and uncaring about stuff/opinions" is a big turn off and I understand this and respect it.

My problem is how I got bullied into doubting myself as a human being for supporting him, how I got called a r.cist, a c.nt, a bitch, a self dragging rat brained crack head.... Many more things on anon or thru the tags or notes openly (some shitheads are brave here, I must commend) I just wanted to be left alone. I didn't want to get called creative names for liking/reblogging a Seb/Kimi or Kimi/otherdriver pic or video, get blocked simply because I did that or for having Kimi's name as my username or his pic as my header/pp or get mentioned in a nasty way after liking/reblogging old Kimi/Simi stuff from some blogs that no longer like him or get nasty tags added to my own posts of Kimi with other drivers...

The bar is so low, but I can't even have that. In time, I grew a thick skin, but 4 years of Kimi and Seb pics and videos got deleted together with my old blog.... Wish I didn't delete. Wish my friends didn't delete. But what is done is done. I hope to persevere this time as my blogs are my sole resting space rn, a space where I try to forget about my life. So, I will keep them.

I am happy you reached out and gave me this chance to talk about this ♥️ Thank you so much 🤜🤛

#i answer things #sorry this is long and im on mobile i can't put it under a read more but I don't think the few people who are following me will care much #kimi

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cosmik-homo · 2 years

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I posted 21,560 times in 2021

1510 posts created (7%)

20050 posts reblogged (93%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 13.3 posts.

I added 1,828 tags in 2021

#undescribed - 1347 posts#cr spoilers - 111 posts#critical role spoilers - 104 posts#:0 - 48 posts#oh my god - 42 posts#deltarune spoilers - 39 posts#row spoilers - 38 posts#quotes - 37 posts#alfredcore - 32 posts#cowards glory - 30 posts - 1347 posts

#cr spoilers - 111 posts

#critical role spoilers - 104 posts

#:0 - 48 posts

#oh my god - 42 posts

#deltarune spoilers - 39 posts

#row spoilers - 38 posts

#quotes - 37 posts

#alfredcore - 32 posts

#cowards glory

- 30 posts - y- 30 posts - 30 posts0 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#בלי קשר לזה שהיא משקיעה את כל הנשמה ואת כל הפאקינג בריאות שלה בסה וללמד זה החיים שלה ותלמידים שלה שכבר השתחררו עכשיו זוכרים אותה ומפרגנים

My Top Posts in 2021

When people talk about "Star Wars Day" I like it but it's so funny to me they have one centralized day. Star Trek people celebrate seventeen times a year. Star trek people are always down to party.

242 notes • Posted 2021-03-16 10:56:23 GMT

This is why Sazed didn't want to teach electricity to scadrial

296 notes • Posted 2021-05-28 05:42:22 GMT

ok as local tmp apologist YES it is VERY MUCH aout spock being gay but its also bout spock being a GAY JEW. he is SEARCHING FOR A GOD TO CONDEMN OR ACCEPT HIM AND HIS LOVE. AND HE FINDS GOD IS NOT IN THE THUNDERSTORM OR THE DRY WORD, IT IS NOT IN DRY ADHERENCE TO THE RULES BECAUSE THEY ARE RULES, BUT PROTECTING THEIR BEAUTY AND THEIR MEANING OF THE WORLD

343 notes • Posted 2021-04-18 17:49:52 GMT

Seriously I need people to understand that Spock being miserable in Vulcan society and it is a source of struggle in his life and what not does not mean Vulcan society and culture is inherently negative, wrong, negative and harmful. Not only is that. Completely missing the point of Star Trek and of, like, being a basically enlightened person when it comes to views on the human (e) condition and society and culture, it also dampens Spock's own narrative.

Spock is miserable in Vulcan society and with Vulcan norms because it is not right for him. Because his family and community sucks, because he is discriminated against for his mixed heritage, and not accommodated or given space for his human related traits and needs. He is miserable I'm Vulcan society and under the classic, rigid Vulcan philosophy of emotional inhibitions because of his own life story.

But the ideas themselves are not evil, thru work for some people without being unhealthy and serve their purpose. On a big red planet many people live their lives and let others live, and I can assure you there are communities on Vulcan in that era or after where people like Spock were living different lives.

In the end he still finds value in Vulcan teaching and adjusts them to his level of comfort- look at late movies Spock, making his own path and acting much less rigid, answering Amanda's "how do you feel" and engaging in tomfoolery with Kirk and McCoy while still being Vulcan in his culture and some others aspect of his speech.

Anyways why don't you watch some Tuvok centered episodes and embrace Surak into your hearts. No prophet has ever offered a path who harmed none and a religion that left no frustrated children on the side of the road; just because Spock needed to get out doesn't mean there is any moral basis for thinking you know better than an entire planet and all vulcans should act in a way that fits your worldview

514 notes • Posted 2021-07-10 16:47:49 GMT

prologue to academic books on jewish masculinity im reading: “ In early modern eastern Europe, the ideal Jewish male, the Rabbi or talmudic student, was indeed characterized by qualities that made him very different from, in fact almost the exact opposite of, the "knight in shining armor" heartthrob of our romantic culture. The East European Jewish ideal of a gentle, timid, and studious male-Edelkayt-moreover, does have origins that are very deeply rooted in traditional Jewish culture, going back at least in part to the Babylonian Talmud. These characteristics, however, were not supposed to render the male even slightly unappealing, let alone "very unattractive." For Peskowitz's American students, even American Jews, the gentleness of the rabbinic male can only be imagined as sexlessness, encoded as unattractiveness, because these students (like most of us) have been molded so thoroughly by the "dominant fiction" 2 of gender that our culture maintains. A gentle, studious, sweet man can only be imagined as old and nearsighted (i.e., castrated?) and could not possibly be attractive sexually. In the readings that follow this introduction, we will see that such a man is interpreted as anything but sexless within rabbinic texts; indeed, he is represented as the paramount desiring male subject and object of female desire.” (explains how this different VALUE and not content change is what we need to understand to understand and recreate in our imaginaitons what old jewish gender cultural view was like)

Me: ....are you saying. does this mean the way Spock became a sex symbol is the best victory of jewish masculinity in years.

576 notes • Posted 2021-02-17 12:37:40 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #WOW this little guy can spockpost like it's nobodies business

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