#kid. stop talking abt the positive aspects of the compulsive way i live my life when its literally strangling me to death and i want it to

[opens-up-4-nobody]

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#weird day. really weird day #i couldnt sleep v well bc my brain was fucked up and i was prob dehydrated so im like extremely out of focus #i did go to the health and wellness center and am now back in therapy which is why my day was so fucking wild. like im too tired so im not #opperating correctly but it was real weird. like last time i got assessed by someone who basically sorted me to a therapist according to my #problems. this time i just kinda stumbled into a 1st session with someone and i dont kno how to feel abt how it went. it was odd #like we didnt go thru like an entire thing of like what r all ur problems? it was more i started talking abt things and he got stuck on #some specific things i said and we talked abt that. which im of 2 minds abt bc he did instantly latch onto the root of some of my issues #which is that i feel fucking dumb all the time bc my brain works a little different but it also wasnt helpful bc like theres a stereotypic #verson of my experience and then theres what i actually went thru and those things dont align in the way he was talking abt it. like i #think were were just talking past eachother a bit. like he wasn't exactly wrong but i do feel a bit like i walked in with an open wound and #and he decided the best course of action was to pat me on the head and tell me im v smart so i walked out still bleeding. but i dont think #its was all bad bc it got under my skin so much. i react like a cat thrown in a bath if u try to call me smart. like fuck off. yes ok im #smart. i have a certified document saying that i have above average intelligence. big fucking whoop. im too fucking dyslexic to do anything #right and my brain is constantly trying to strangle me to death. he called me a gifted kid. fuck u i was too fucking dyslexic to b a gifted #kid. stop talking abt the positive aspects of the compulsive way i live my life when its literally strangling me to death and i want it to #stop. acknowledge my pain old man. also i hate thst therapists hate the word weird. its not a bad word i like that word. i disagree #fundamental with the assertion that its bad. also he pointed out that i talk like a freak. like a person with high intelligence. fuck u i #like words. i will peel my own skin off if u call me smart one more time. lol i was so mad. i argued with him like the whole time. also he #mentioned horoscopes which was weird but whatever. we'll see how the next one goes. i told him to his face i i didnt kno if what we talked #abt was helpful. possibly the rudest ive ever been to a stranger lol. well see how the next session goes. at least it was interesting #god. im fucking so tired and wrung out. #unrelated