#kaeya you bitch

[onthehuntforshinies]

headcanon that xiao smells like petrichor. kaeya smells like snow/cold(y'all can't tell me that cold don't have a smell, it DOES.). noelle smells like roses but also cleaning supplies. rose scented cleaning supplies how's that. zhongli smells. warm. you get no explanation.

#headcannons #zhongli my beloved #xiao my beloved #kaeya you bitch #noelle my darling #bro the difference in how i treat them istg #genshin impact #genshin headcanons #my beloveds #my darlings #i love them your honor #shitpost #writing #im a simp #with no shame #you get no context

[apotheotic-cravings]

Played genshin again for the first time in two years (I have been informed it has only been one actually)

#my art #fanart #genshin impact #venti #genshin impact venti #kaeya alberich #diluc ragnvindr #albedo #??? does he have last name #Klee #I shan’t tag the scribbled ladies. no tagging of background lesbians here. only foreground lesbos get that privilege #anyways venti and kaeya are my favourite characters #I think it’s so fucking funny how mean diluc is like HES VALID RIGHT BUT HES SUCH A BITCH ITS FUNNY #also for concerned parties; I don’t ship them #Anyways what actually got me to pick it up again was I saw a clip of cyno and I was like oh fuck… tan skinned dogboy…. started frothing at t #FROTHING at the mouth you don’t know me you don’t underSTAND #imagine my fucking disappointment. to find out. this fucker isn’t even a dogboy HES JUST A FURRY. #AND I missed his banner. #WHAT. EVER. I’ll just pull for Candace or something #I haven’t even explored inazuma……………….. but I wanna go to sumeru………. auch #I don’t think anyone reads my tags but if ur reading this and ur wondering wether I’ll ever post locked tomb or undertake stuff again…. #the answer is I WANT TO but I don’t control what my body makes ok. I’m trapped in this vessel but I do not puppet it around my body is #at the mercy of otherworldly forces and I submit to their will #simply because it is easier than the alternative #I’m NOT discoursing but I would have picked up genshin way faster if there were more darker skinned charas #like something something politics or whatever but I. personally. me? I just find melanized characters more appealing is all

[menstits]

Sorry the whole debate is stupid because saying that diluc nearly killing kaeya wasn't a big deal or that it was justified is literally not something I'd expect him to want to hear either just going off of how his relationship with kaeya is written in the actual game like you think diluc would suck your dick if you told him he was right for attacking his brother, whom he clearly still loves and misses even if he's incapable of showing it in a non ass backwards manner? Girl he'd kill himself

#🗨️ #there's a REASON why the events are mostly described from kaeya's pov!!!!!!!!! there's a reason why the writing nudges you towards #symphathizing with kaeya over it!!!!!!!!! DUMB BITCH

[queenofepic]

he’s in your area!!!!!

This shitpost was somehow the thing to wrench me out of my art block. I’ve been working on it over the past 3 weekends. The original vid I drew on top of is here, sorry for ruining it with genshit impoop </3

#qoe art #qoe edit #genshin impact #dainsleif #genshin dainsleif #genshin fanart #of course i ended up liking the one guy who looks like dimitri. of course i did #now that ive drawn dain 36 times i think theres something wrong with me #death grips #also if there are bitches you dont recognize. those are my ocs dont worry about them #genshin kaeya #genshin albedo #idk if the dainkaes wanna claim this but feel free lmao

[dutybcrne]

Both Beidou and Kaeya have a breeding kink but not in the way you think.

#hc; kaeya #hc; beidou #//Aka; neither got a dick; but boy would they love to get a bitch pregnant lmao #//Play it up for them; and they will Worship you #//Esp if their partner is male; you have no IDEA how much they’d love it #//Kae is Tentative on playing up his partner’s if they wanna breed him tho #//Either they Really gotta offer him some incentive to agree; or he’s gotta Trust them lots #//Beidou just straight up won’t humor it otherwise. nope. unless you are a nature loving short king. or Other Special Exception #suggestive #//Wrios’ got it too; played straight or reversed #//Like yeah; he’d loved to breed sb or be bred; he’s chill either way #//Kaveh’s the inverse; you outright tell him you’re gonna breed him and he will go Nuts #hc; wriothesley #hc; Kaveh #//Near forgot to add those lmao #//Koko; Dan; Lumi & Lyney are all VERY conditional with it #//Gotta be Just the right person or it’s not really gonna do much. like #//Lumi & Lyney at least will still play into if their partner’s super into it tho; esp if it’s suddenly brought up midway #//Who am I forgetting #//Oh yeah #hc; kazuha #//Very low key; but doesn’t really kick in for him until a partner brings it up or he’s Really Committed

[hematomes]

so. did a kin test on selectsmart and got the worst possible results

im going to kill myself i was so confident it'd be venti or kaeya in 1st place that i just forgot THIS FUCKING GUY ever existed.

#everyday i wake up and im a childe kinnie #LEAVE ME ALONE YOU GINGER BITCH #falls on the ground and weeps. #at least kaeya's in 2nd place #also didn't expect zhongli like what are you doing here 💀 we are nothing alike bestie #& the diluc hu tao xiao at 67% is uncomfortable. am i that depressed

[softshuji]

Thunder manifestation worst Genshin boss in the entire game btw

#I'm doing tsurumi island quest right at the end #and yknow when you have to beat the boss #in that cave? #i got all the way to the end and my kaeya was the only one left #and my internet died #bitch i hate this boss i hate it so much

[daxdraggon]

Kaeya's turn! He gives me 'styled beard' vibes and it's a shame he doesn't have one. I fixed that. Darkened his skin tone a smidge, then darkened one eye and made the pupils larger since they were miniscule. Squared his jaw a bit (it doesn't show up as much as I'd like ) and rounded his nose.

He could be this but they only have tops on their design team I guess.

#draggonart #genshin impact #mmd #kaeya alberich #listen if you're going to appeal to gays you need fems AND mascs. For ALL genders. Too many twinks and fems in this bitch of a world

[howthesleeplesswander]

[ COVER ] ((bring in the DRAMAAAA! also reply with any muse you like~!

Things done while sparring/fighting || Accepting! || @theoneandonii

((YAAAS THE DRAMAAAA 🙌 Thank you so much for sending this in! ❤️ I am physically incapable of NOT adding a ton of situational context to these scenario-based memes so aslkjfkd i'M SORRY IT GOT SUPER LONG 8'D I hope you enjoy!))

Kaeya may have underestimated how dangerous it would be to wander Inazuma on his own.

The storms and downpours weren't a problem. The nation ruled by the God of Wind also boasted its fair share of tempests, so the Captain was used to trekking through rain and mud. No, it was the wandering threats of the island nation that had caught him off guard.

Mondstadt was a relatively safe place. Even on his most eventful patrols, he'd only have to deal with hilichurls or treasure hoarders. Thus, he'd been drastically unprepared when a fully armored samurai rushed him in the middle of a raging storm, his wicked blade and silhouette nearly twice Kaeya's height illuminated by flashes of lightning.

The enemy's strength rivaled even the most brutish lawachurls that wandered the plains of Mondstadt; Kaeya deflected his blows, but the sheer force behind each left him staggering. Bursts from Kaeya's Vision illuminated the darkness. The rain gave him an edge, but the samurai's strength kept them evenly matched until—

A vicious strike wrenched Kaeya's arms and made him cry out. His sword dropped into the mud, and the samurai bashed his shoulder into his chest. One stumble on the slicked ground was all it took for Kaeya to fall prone on his back. A streak of lightning glinted off the blade plunging towards him. His eye squeezed shut and he braced himself...

But no pain ever came. A sudden weight pressed down on him and forced the air from his chest in a rush. His eye shot open as he sputtered, staring in dazed shock up at the face of the stranger whose body covered his own. Rain dripped from long white hair onto Kaeya's cheeks.

"Wh—" He didn't know which of the dozen questions whirling in his mind would've escaped if it had the chance. Who are you? What are you doing here? Why would you do that for someone you don't even know? But none of those thoughts could fully form before the deadly glimmer of steel flashed over the stranger's shoulder.

He'd already been hurt for Kaeya's sake. Whoever he was, Kaeya would protect him in return.

"Keep your head down!" he shouted over the roar of the rain. Icy blue light spilled through the mud caked over his Vision. One hand delved into silvery locks to draw the other's head safely into the crook of his shoulder, while the other swept through the air, permafrost crackling on his fingertips.

Ice burst from his palm and froze the rain just above them, propelling the resulting spray of frigid needles into the samurai's face with the force of gunfire. Their attacker cried out and stumbled backward, and Kaeya wasted no time. He scrambled up onto his elbows, his grip on the other sliding down to his arm to help support him as he sat up.

"Hey—can you stand?" A concerned sapphire scrutinized the stranger's face, trying to gauge the severity of his injury. His voice was soft, but urgent. "This isn't over yet."

#《⭒✩⭒ || interaction: prince of lies and snow (kaeya) 》 #《⭒✩⭒ || answered ask 》 #theoneandonii #tysm again! this was super fun to reply to!! ^w^/ #Kaeya is shocked at the compassion of a total stranger ;~; #but also is like NAH BITCH YOU AIN'T HURTING THIS NICE PERSON AGAIN #NOT ON MY WATCH >8C #I low-key love Kaeya and Itto interacting together tbh 👀 #and I love the idea of them meeting this way asdjflkdj it's so precious 😭 #but yeee feel free to continue this if you want! uwu/ #and sorry again about writing a casual novel for a meme reply asfjdksdf #SOMETIMES IT DO BE LIKE THAT X'D

[4ggravation]

thinking about that 5-minute kaeya interaction we had in caribert vs his character stories. how he tells us about his khaenri'ahn legacy so casually as if it doesn't bother him at all but his character stories suggest that it does indeed haunt him. how he says he doesn't care but evidence shows so, so much otherwise. but if it truly hurt him he wouldn't have told us so damn easily. i can't tell which source was lying because there's evidence pointing to both...

i need to know. how much the choice of loyalty and freedom really affects him. how much his legacy affects him

*vomits* /j

#i just wanna say #HOYOVERSE YOU DICKS #JUST TELL ME HOW TRAUMATIZED HE IS #im so confused #RAHHH #im going insane #kaeya alberich #kaeya ragnvindr #and that doesnt even begin to touch on my throughts abt the quest itself #FUCK that chlothar bitch #so many thoughts to be thunk....... #screams cries throws up

[sunderberry]

anyway thinking about diluc ships for real

#non exhaustive list of people i ship with diluc in no particular order #dvalin albedo jean razor eula kaeya rosaria andrius venti #uh who else is in mondstadt who i care about #fuck it moving on to liyue #xiao yelan ganyu fuck i dunno #ayato ayaka itto scaramouche kokomi kazuha #tbh i do actually ship diluc with everybody but these are the ones i'd actually seek out when i'm in the mood #alhaitham il dottore cyno wriothesley neuvilette furina arlecchino #as we get farther away from mondstadt i get less sure about the ships but here we are #*slaps diluc* this bad boy can fit so much everybody inside him #my top 5 are probably something like dvalin venti xiao jean albedo ganyu #top 6* sorry #most of them are anemo bitches i think diluc is anemi bitch catnip #most people think ganyu is weird but have you considered that i have torn apart her canon personality and substituted my own #also i think she has a massive h*rse**** #also i have Feelings about dvalin you don't even know #dvalin and diluc gave so much potential i will show you all one day #just lemme actually do some work on that fanfic #one day it'll see the light of day #tag rant

[frozenambiguity]

Kaeya does not have a solid, detailed opinion on Dainsleif yet. He is intrigued by Dainsleif because he hails from Khaenri'ah. As someone who still has a tie to his homeland ( imposed by exterior circumstances ) and is interested in it ( why else would he have traveled to Sumeru in hopes of finding Khaenri'ah's whereabouts? ), Kaeya cannot disregard Dainsleif's existence so easily.

But do you want to know something? The fact that Dainsleif has been observing and studying him for who knows how long? Now that pisses him off. And although he did not exhibit any hint of annoyance as Dain specifically ordered a Death After Noon upon their initial meeting, oh, let it be known that it was very much present internally.

Kaeya Alberich likes digging into suspicious people's lives. Likes to observe them. To study them. To find out more about their personalities, routines, plans, and motivations. Kaeya Alberich does not like, however, when he is the very victim and/or focus of said schemes.

#{{ I sense...... a hypocrite }} #{{ asjfhaja no but it was so funny }} #{{ dainsleif: one death after noon pls **in passive-aggressive** }} #{{ kaeya alberich: this bitch.............. miss me with that attitude }} #{{ and let me buy you a drink next time instead of you hiding in the shadows; you sneaky clown **in passive-aggressive** }} #{{ kaeya alberich and dainsleif; kings of passive-aggressiveness. who would have thought. not me }} #{{ but i'm l i v i n g for this dynamic }} #【 let me tell you a story | thoughts to be shared. 】

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

and so i beat his ass

#ITS TIME TO DDDDDUEL #ignore my cards okay the starter characters are really good #focus instead on my cool card backings and deck names okay smh #well i guess you cant see the other deck #the other one has the dandelion back & its called dusk #its just the same deck but with kaeya instead of diluc #this dude seriously thought he was gonna win LMAOOOOOO #get phoenixed. bitch #aethers gaming

[greedbent]

kae.ya: h- kaz: no.

@howthesleeplesswander

#howthesleeplesswander #〣♚{ ooc } #literally the dynamicTM #kaeya breathed and kaz was like #“this shouldn't be my problem but here it is... being my problem” #kaz don't pretend literally anyone existing isn't annoying to you in some way #don't mind him he's just a bitch baby #carry on being your beautiful wonderful self kaeya!

[ccaptain]

  overall, kaeya thinks that he actually needed a breather. a breather with ginger hair and a smile that could rival the sunlight, pulling him by the hand while giggling like a child about it.

  they abandon mondstadt in an hurry, like they're fugitives: past a certaint point, their relaxed stroll breaks into a run as if pursued just for the thrill of it, the freedom tasting sweet on their tongues. they stop around halfway towards liyue, where childe shields him from the looming sight of dawn's winery with an arm around his waist, guiding him into a region he knows a bit better than kaeya.

  it seems like ajax is whisking him away, perhaps to outsiders, but he wants him to do just that.

  it's the most relaxing vacation that kaeya remembers spending: for three weeks he breathes, watches and lives with childe, watching him closely while they travel. he doesn't remember their hands leaving eachother for more than ten minutes at worst, fingers entertwined as one of them trails at the other's side. teyvat is beautiful, and while the foolish notion of traveling all of it is tempting, they simply don't have enough time to do that.

  so they move between liyue and the vast territory parting it from the city of freedom, daring to edge at the chasm and sitting in a comfortable, empty tree trunk that borders in sumeru to rest a while and watch the gynormous sumpter beasts do the same in a large field. kaeya rests his back against the musk and, for once, doesn't find himself disgusted by it.

  sometimes in inns, in and out quick, sometimes in caves, they find peace with eachother. for once there are no fatui, no knights, no political discussions. for once, they're just kaeya and ajax.

  in front of a sunset, after bickering about entrails and fishy kisses, kaeya expresses a quiet wish that this inner peace he feels could last forever. childe softly comments that he likes to share a life with him, both good and bad sides, and kaeya closes his eyes, pacified and bathing himself in the coziness of a camp, with a familiar body warmth to lean into. even the damned, slimy food doesn't taste so bad.

  when they come back to civilization, the city of freedom seems a mountain of unnatural houses, of strangers happily greeting him. the faces all blend together in a blur of days spent chasing cats and scolding drunken citizens from doing irresponsible things.

  the sun shines down over the city, warm and pleasant, but kaeya has grown colder and jaded towards the place who was never this home, if it was further possible.

  if his friends notice, nobody mentions it.

#captain on board ━ (ic) #kaeya 'i would sell mondstadt to celestia for one corn chip' alberich #MONDSTADT SLANDER #honestly and sincerely thinking that an affection starved fool like kaeya would just end up feeling out of place in monds. just a thought #he's acting normal! hes just not particulary in the mood to do much else than act on his persona #bitch imagine enjoying the wine festival and then fucking barbatos just make you hear your own father abandoning you. crazy #he's SO jaded #@jean slap this fool over the head some thx #he's gay and bitter when he isnt gay smh #venti: maybe kaeya misses his dad! here hear his voice c: / kaeya: @barbatos perish

[mommalosthermind]

Tell me what y’all running Kaeya on because I feel like my man could be so much better. Someday. Maybe. If I ever manage a five star weapon. Any build. Just, what are you doing with him, because I keep changing builds like an idiot

Yes this is me procrastinating on figuring out if I should crown the skill or the burst and also whining about artifact farming because fuck artifacts

#kaeya #genshin impact #he’s probably not as bad as I think since I am not a whale #but also I scored a gravestone for my diluc and suddenly #there is a Difference between them #and that makes me sad #standard banner needs to be kind and give me a five star sword now don’t make me go to the weapon banner don’t do it #gonna spend my free time watching Kaeya build videos to #and getting more sad that it’ll probably be more ‘go back to the mountain bitch’ #rip ayaka I’ll build you eventually I promise