Bad Times at the El Royale (2018)
1 note
·
View note
My Santa - Breakdown
How #pure is this couple/ will they wait for marriage
Yes, but only because they are presumably tying the knot immediately
How republican is this movie on scale of 1 – 10
4? There’s a scene about helping the less fortunate, but this movie couldn’t even throw the main character a token black friend.
Who wears the pants
Chris, definitely
Rate lead girl “spunkiness on scale from quiet Midwest bookworm to jaded new York lawyer
Jaded New York lawyer with a tragic past
How well does the lead man line up with the “mountain lodge” ideal
Medium high. Christ LOOKS like he could chop a log, but we never see him do so.
Likelihood that town cheeriness facades a neilgaiman/Shirley Jackson horror club
So very, very high
Cute animal character?
Well, Chris has an elf friend that is kind of never explained
One instance of questionable theology
There is no religion in this movie
Select a level of jesus
The least amount of jesus
If the main character is a reporter, did they mention that print is dead?
Yes.
5 notes
·
View notes
OP literally likes Jerry but go off I guess
WHY I NEVER
1 note
·
View note
With every post, a smile, ت
0 notes
I think Jim Oheir is getting a little lonely without our collective drooling lol Please post more of that sexy chubby daddy.
ok
113 notes
·
View notes
My Santa - Review
My Santa (2013)
Marvista
Runtime: 84 minutes
Synopsis:
Did you ask for the Twilight version of Christmas? NO? YOU DIDN’T? Well too bad. Jen is a single mom who hates Christmas that gets entangled with the literal son of Santa Claus who is looking for ‘the one.’
Review:
So let’s get out of the way first: this movie is bad. I’m not sure what happened in the starring actor’s lives (the main couple are both from beloved sitcoms of years ago) to make them phone it in SO MUCH. These actors HATE being in this movie. But if you’re like me and you got a friend and some alcohol, you will not hate watching it. I’ll give it a “7” on the scale of “bad movies that I watch ironically.”
Does this movie feature real human emotions and actions?
Not in the slightest.
How long is this couple realistically going to last?
Till death do them part and I think it’s going to be Jen’s (Chris literally NEVER mentions a mother).
Biggest “NO”
This is a 2013 movie that somehow thinks it is in 2009 for some reason? People still say “JPEG” outloud and the woman is wearing boxy powder blue cardigans? It’s weird and it hurts the eyes.
Biggest “Yes”
Everything Chris mentioned about his Santa lifestyle and destiny was brilliant and I need four books and a genderswapped version to sate my morbid fascination.
Where do I know them from?
Samaire Armstong (Jen): The OC (Anna), The Mentalist (Summer Edgecomb)
Matthew Lawrence (Chris): Boy Meets World (Jack Hunter), Melissa & Joey (Tony Longo)
Jim O’Heir (Jack): Parks & Recreation (Jerry)
2 notes
·
View notes
Logan Lucky (2017)
This is one of those films that could’ve been made better quite easily by simply trimming it. It could’ve lost a good 30 minutes, especially near the end, and still worked. It took a while to get going, and then after we’d reached what seemed like the end, it went on for another 20 minutes or something. Other than that, it was fairly enjoyable. The cast is good, with Daniel Craig being the obvious standout. It’s so good to see him do something different like this. Seth MacFarlane was pretty terrible though. It had some good, funny moments, as well as some tense ones that couldn’t help but remind oneself of Ocean’s Eleven (2001). I think it’s worth a watch, but yeah, could’ve been tighter.
0 notes