[14.0 sweater weather] BETTER THAN REVENGE !
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the night was loud. between jeongin and han's bickering, changbin's laughter, and chan's occasional reprimands, there was no place for awkward silence. even as the seconds advanced towards midnight, and the rest of the campus fell into a peaceful silence, jeongin's dorm was filled with noise.
and for that, you were grateful.
"you dumbass you didn't boil the ramen enough!"
"I did. This isn't my first time making ramen!"
"no it's still-"
"ok that's enough," chan interjects, throwing an exasperated glare at the youngest boys of the group. "Han if you think the ramen is undercooked just add warmer water to it."
"I don't think that's how it works-"
"oh for fucks sake just eat the damn food!"
you watch in amusement as the boy sinks further into the couch, a pout puckering against his lips as he shoves the chopsticks into his mouth.
"nobody ever takes me seriously here-"
"anyways!" changbin exclaims, meaningfully pinching han's side as his eyes raise to meet yours, "we have more important stuff to discuss than how jeongin makes ramen."
it takes you a second to realize all their eyes have turned to you - although jeongin looks unwilling.
"so yn, innie here isn't giving you too much trouble, right?" changbin teases, digging his elbow into his friend's side.
"of course i haven't-"
"let her speak!"
you laugh at the way jeongin huffs, crossing his arms before falling back into his seat, avoiding your eyes.
"he's a pain. i can't wait for this to be over," you play along - much to han and changbin's excitement as their eyes light up.
"has he? well that isn't acceptable, is it?"
"can you leave me alone?"
but that seemed to be the last thing on any of their minds as they turn their attention towards you again.
"you know when he first told us about your arrangement we were a bit worried," chan adds, "but this seems to be working out for you guys."
chan was by far the only one who hadn't teased the youngest boy, but you could clearly see he was just as interested in the conversation.
"yeah well, we're trying. we'll see how much it's really helped him after our test next week."
"yeah-"
"but has this been helping you as effectively?"
you blink at han in confusion as he leans forwards from the couch.
"what?"
"han drop it-"
"you know with the entire making yeonjun jealous plan? i hope you've been giving his cheating ass a hard time!"
yeonjun.
cheating.
oh.
all the progress you had made came crashing down in that single moment.
han hadn't anticipated the depth of his words, obviously. it was a mistake, and you understood that, but the weight still fell like solid lead down your stomach. your throat clogged up, and you could barely meet any of their eyes as the culprit slapped a hand across his mouth, evidently regretting it.
cheating little slut.
yeonjun's words came breaking through the barriers you had tried so hard to build.
it's your fault.
you didn't think it was possible, but your mother's words pierced deeper than yeonjun cheating on you.
any sensible boy would break up with you.
she was probably right. nobody in their right minds would like someone who couldn't even bring herself to move past the boy who had cheated on her.
you should apologize to him. like your mother expected you to.
your company had obviously picked up on your discomfort, and if you hadn't been so caught up you would be embarrassed at the revelation of the chink in your armor.
"you dumbass," you hear changbin hiss under his breath.
"yn im sorry-"
jeongin was the first to act - slipping his hand into yours to pull you up - sending a sharp glare towards his roommate.
"i think we're done for today," he said, gently guiding you towards the front door, picking up your books on the way.
"you guys clean up, please. i'll drop yn back to her dorm."
he only gave you enough time to bid your goodbye to the three boys - including a forgiving smile towards han - before you two stepped out into the cold night.
"you don't have to walk me back."
"it's past midnight, yn. i'm not letting you go alone."
you were grateful, despite your hesitance. the last thing you wanted was to be alone with your thoughts.
"and i'm sorry about han. he didn't mean to bring him up."
you shake your head, patting jeongin's arm in comfort. "it wasn't his fault, don't worry about it. and please tell him not to feel guilty either. it's alright."
"but are you sure you're okay?"
were you okay?
you didn't know.
until the last match, you and yeonjun were technically still on good terms. there had been no bad blood.
but after your argument? you didn't even know where your relationship stood.
you hadn't broken up officially. you were still together, and the thought was sickening. not because you wanted to break up with him. no. but because it was reassuring. and you hated the little comfort that it bought.
"yn?"
your gaze snaps to the side as jeongin's hand softly brushes yours.
"sorry, i was just thinking," you sheepishly mutter, avoiding his eyes.
he doesn't push any further, and the rest of the walk is spent in silence until you reach your block.
"thanks jeongin."
he shoves his hands into the pockets of his sweats, smiling back as the street light shines down on him, highlighting his features.
"don't worry about it. sleep well, yeah?"
you almost send him away with that, but the cold breeze that flutters past your skin jars you into your senses.
"wait!"
you hastily take off your hoodie, patting down your ruffled hair as he turns to look at you in confusion.
"something wrong?"
"it's cold. take this. you didn't carry yours," you say, thrusting the article at him, avoiding his eyes.
"oh it's fine-"
"we have an important exam coming up. i'd hate it if you fell sick because of me."
he doesn't notice the blush dusting your face as he thankfully accepts the warmer clothing, and you're grateful for the dark.
"thanks yn."
"i should thank you."
he grins at you one last time before he's on his way back, absentmindedly fiddling with the sleeves of your hoodie, sending a kaleidoscope of butterflies fluttering in your stomach. you hoped you weren't imagining the tips of his ears turning red. you hoped he would keep it, and only give it back when it had caught on to his scent.
in a much better mood than with which you had set out from his dorm, you almost manage push away yeonjun to the back of your mind.
that is until your phone notifies an incoming message.
never mind.
©lixie-phoria, 2024
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