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#it was 1998 and good mother of fuck that was Elena
hussyknee · 3 months
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List of Why The Fuck Didn't I Realise I Was Into Women Sooner #2: Catherine Zeta Jones's sword fight with Antonio Banderas in Mask of Zorro.
That part where her hair was hanging loose and wild and he'd cut the shoulder off her nightdress and she disarmed and advanced on him like an avenging Fury, eyes ablaze and breathing hard— fundamentally altered my brain chemistry. Haven't been the same person since.
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jckelly · 3 years
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updated intro / jack 101
Is that JACK KELLY? Wow, they do look a lot like VAN MCCANN. I hear HE is an NINETEEN year old FRESHMEN who are studying AEROSPACE ENGINEERING  at Luxor University. Word is they are an ARISTOCRAT student. You should watch out because they can be PHILOPHOBIC and INSINCERE, but on the bright side they can also be WITTY and IMAGINATIVE. Ultimately, you’ll get to see it all for yourself. [YUNI, 21, GMT, SHE/HER]
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 the other two got updated intros n rat man felt left out
basics
full name: jackson noel kelly 
nicknames: jack (does not answer to jackson)
date of birth: december 25, 2001
zodiac: capricorn sun, leo ascendant, sagittarius moon
nationality: dual uk and us citizenship
sexual orientation: straight but will try anything once
course: aerospace engineering
appearance
faceclaim: van mccann 
voiceclaim: van mccann
ethnicity: white (english, irish)
height: 5′8 / 173cm
weight: 58kg / 127lbs
eye colour: blue
hair colour: brown
distinctive features: freckles (many), left ear pierced, scars on his wrists usually covered by long sleeves, northern english accent
clothing preferences: jack prefers to only wear black, or at a push grey, although he’s slowly improving and will Occasionally mix it up with ... navy. his style is pretty basic, usually just a sweater, jeans, and beat up black converse or doc martens depending on how emo he’s feeling. the sheffield united hoodie makes an appearance every time someone forgets precisely which uk city jack is from. 
personality
overview
positive traits: witty, imaginative, perseverant, passionate
negative traits: philophobic, disloyal, insincere, callous
mbti: entp
religious beliefs: atheist
description
the first side most people see of jack is the side he wants you to see. a total asshole. it’s not an exaggeration - he’s pretty much infamous for flirting with everyone, dating anyone and as a serial cheater. he’ll actively try to worm his way into your life, and then just when you start to care, he does something to hurt you. he’s strangely persistent, probably helping him to push people even further, until they snap. there is nothing which satisfies him more than managing to wind people up to the extreme, get them to the point where they give up. adopted parents, friends, nobody is immune to this side - he even tries it on the people he genuinely cares about, as if just to see if he’ll still be able to push them away.
the second side, which most people don’t see, is that at heart jack is a kid. he’s the type of person to ask if owls have ears at 3am, or get some childlike joy out of dumb jokes. of course, this is the side nobody but a very small number of people see. and even if you do see it, it never lasts long. he keeps his true personality under wraps even amongst those he does like, and it only slips out if he’s extremely comfortable with you. otherwise, he’ll go straight back to being a sarcastic, flirty piece of shit.
biography
jackson noel kelly was born in hell on ironically christmas day to his father satan......
jk
jack and his older half brother finn were born in sheffield, united kingdom, to a single mother. a drug addict, she was notorious among social workers for neglecting her children and as a result jack shuffled between foster homes and his mother’s home during his first ten years of life, with finn, less than four years older than him, being his primary carer even when he was back with his birth family. this cycle finally ended when jack was ten and he was permanently removed from his mother’s care, and placed in the first of a series of foster homes which didn’t last particularly long.
the thing was, jack’s remarkably good at pushing people away when he wants to, and as he got older his talents only increased. running away, wreaking havoc, insulting anyone who tried to get close and anything else he could possibly think of meant that for three years he lasted no longer than eight months in any one place. in fact, he frequently took himself back to live with his birth family until social services came to drag him out again. this lifestyle continued until he was fostered by his now adopted parents, claire and george, at thirteen.
much to jack’s dismay, no matter of hell raising would push these newest set of parents away. in fact, they seemed absolutely set on raising him as Their Son, even as his attempts to get them off his back got more and more extravagant. they removed him from his previous school, transferred him to a fancy private school, put him in therapy and tried their best to help him get through all of the issues developed through his slightly fucked up childhood.
the thing was, jack loves his mother. he still refuses to see her as being in the wrong, no matter what people tell him or what he himself recalls, in his mind he has one mother and that’s his birth mother. so he did not take kindly to attempts by his foster parents to become his “new” family, because in jack’s mind? he already had a family. and even though they were actively encouraging him to continue contact with his brother, he couldn’t help but see them as trying to replace his birth family.
jack’s fifteenth year pretty much became the year when all of these issues finally came to a head. he was adopted legally by his foster parents, who had now been fostering him for two years - which should have been a happy occasion, but for jack represented the final loss, the final betrayal to his birth mother and brother. then shortly after his fifteenth birthday his brother went to prison at eighteen for grievous bodily harm, having glassed another boy after an argument.
of course, it would later be revealed that in actuality the assault had been committed by jack. and that finn was simply covering for him. (they looked alike enough that questions were not raised, it had happened so fast.) but in the eyes of jack’s adopted parents, finn was now a dangerous offender and jack had to be protected from him. so he was then isolated from his brother, his mother had relapsed and his continuous guilt over being adopted played on his mind, culminating in a suicide attempt in march 2017. 
of course, he wasn’t successful, but this was the final straw in the minds of his adopted parents. they felt jack needed a fresh start, away from the people who had defined his life prior to that point. so by his sixteenth birthday, jack had been moved to the united states to be near the family of his adopted mother, and subsequently enrolled in luxor academy. 
where he continued to be a menace :))
although it did appear, for some time, that jack was showing signs of improvement. sure, he was still wreaking havoc at luxor. but at home, he had calmed, even showing signs of affection to his adopted family. until his mother overdosed suddenly and died when jack was eighteen and things started to immediately go straight downhill again.
he can’t help but blame himself, for allowing himself to be moved. for the move being his fault, if he’s being honest. and if the honesty continues, jack’s got a whole lot of other stuff to blame on himself. (see: ruining his brother’s life.) so now he’s just taking shit out on everyone to try and make them a fraction as miserable as him. 
npc connections
birth fam
finn kelly / fc: jake bugg / b. may 10 1998 / taurus sun, gemini ascendant, pisces moon
finley, who also refuses to use his full name, is jack’s older brother - same mother, different father.  jack thinks he’s boring because he doesn’t raise hell with every opportunity. finn calls this “being a sane person.” went to prison for jack and regrets it. pastimes include crying over murakami books and trying to look shocked when jack tells him about the newest crisis he’s having. 
lauren kelly / fc: elena tonra / b. february 20 1983 - d. april 1 2020 / pisces sun, aries ascendant, leo moon
jack’s birth mother, who was still a teenager when he and finn were born. she was an on again, off again drug addict and had jack removed from her care when he was ten due to continued neglect. instilled in him a love for oasis and a hefty number of mental health issues. looked pretty much exactly like jack. 
jordan taylor / fc: alex turner / b. october 12 1984 / libra sun, leo ascendant, virgo moon
jack’s birth father, who he knows little about. not for lack of trying on his father’s part, who was prevented from seeing jack as a child by his birth mother and blocked from trying to make contact by jack’s refusal to interact. he keeps trying to message jack and jack is running out of daddy issues memes to respond with. finn thinks jack should give him a chance to redeem himself. jack thinks finn should fuck off. 
adopted fam
claire fielding / fc: julia roberts / b. may 12 1964 / taurus sun, cancer ascendant, leo moon
jack’s adopted mother. loves him very much and is convinced he is a sweet boy who just needs love and help. has written a memoir about adopting jack. jack is mad at her constantly. when he is not mad at her, he is embarrassed by her existence. honestly deserves better.
george fielding / fc: timothy olyphant / b. november 6, 1963 / scorpio sun, capricorn ascendant, virgo moon
is proud of jack, but very deep down underneath a strong layer of calling jack out on his bullshit. has some loud ass shouting matches with jack. also really wishes jack would sort his hair out and maybe not look like a cheap liam gallagher. jack honestly just winds him up constantly and he knows jack is doing it but goddamnit it’s so hard to not be mad at the little rat. 
other
maisie adeyemi / fc: yewande biala / b. january 6, 1997 / capricorn sun, sagittarius ascendant, aries moon
finn’s fiancee. her goal in life is to try to get jack to ruin finn’s life at least 70% less often. she has yet to achieve this goal. her love language is setting finn’s phone to silent when he goes to bed to stop jack from phoning in with some sort of random crisis at four in the morning because the little shit forgot timezones exist. finn will never find out. maisie is grateful that men have no brains. 
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hopelikethemoon · 4 years
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Past Connections (Javier x Reader) {MTMF}
Title: Past Connections Rating: PG-13 Length: 2100 Warnings: Mild Angst  Notes: You can find everything about Maybe Today, Maybe Forever here. Set in March 1998. Summary: The second article hits the newstands. 
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PAST CONNECTIONS SPEAK OUT IN DEA SCANDAL 
Following the bombshell report The Post released in the March 2nd issue, the DEA came forward with allegedly incriminating documentation purporting a pattern of unsanctioned expenditures, where Javier Peña had filed expense forms on evenings spent with Colombian hookers. 
During our investigative reporting, The Post was able to connect with three of the women who had been paid by Peña, using DEA funds, during his time with the DEA in Colombia. 
Elena Ramierz, who was willing to go on record using her own name, was forthcoming with information concerning her time with Peña. 
“I would not be where I am today, had I not crossed paths with Javi. He was willing to sponsor my immigration request — without asking for anything in return. Javier Peña is one of the only men I worked with who was a genuinely good man. He cared about all of the girls at the brothels and would look out for us. I cannot, however, say the same about other men who abused the systems the DEA willingly put into place.”
When pressed further, Ramirez went into detail painting a picture of the systemic abuses that were encouraged by the DEA, including but not limited to brutalizing sex workers, non-consensual contact, and intentional situations that led to physical and mental harm. These claims were largely substantiated by the other two women who were willing to speak with The Post. 
“He hated what he had to do to get information for the DEA. You could see the weight on his shoulders. Despite the brutal situation he was in, he was always kind and gentle with me and the other girls. Whatever picture the DEA is trying to paint him out to be, it’s to hide their own misdeeds.”
At the request of the DEA, The Post also made contact with Lorraine Jackson (neé Davis) who was the former ex-fiancé of Peña. Jackson, who hails from Laredo, Texas, provided details about the nature of her relationship with Peña nearly thirty years ago. Despite the DEA’s insistence that Jackson’s testimony would be detrimental to Peña and Morley’s case against DEA, her statement was to the contrary. 
“Look,” Mrs. Jackson stated, “Javier left me at the altar when we were kids. I was angry for a long time. A long time. Even after I got married and started a family with a truly wonderful man. I was still wounded by what Javier did, but it all worked out for the best. I can’t even imagine what life would’ve been like if he’d shown up. Have you met his daughters? They adore him. He’s a good man, despite what happened between us.”
Mrs. Jackson continued, “When the DEA approached me about our relationship, I let my hurt feelings get the best of me. He made a lot of mistakes when he was younger — but didn’t we all? He left, went to college and came back to work for the Sheriff’s Office. He’d closed himself off and frankly, he was an ass. I don’t pretend to know what happened in Colombia, I wasn’t part of his life then, but I could see he had changed when he came home. The DEA wants to paint him out to be a villain in all of this and that’s just not the case.”
The DEA issued a revelatory statement, rebuffing the claims previously printed in The Post. 
There is no doubt that Ms. Morley contributed admirable efforts in the war against Pablo Escobar. As the American people have now seen, her records contain multiple instances where she assisted in the apprehension of multiple associates of Escobar’s. 
Despite her efforts, during her tenure with the DEA in Colombia and Ms. Morley failed to uphold the standards expected of a DEA field agent. One year after her transfer, she entered into a relationship with a CIA liaison who was an active member of a joint task force formed by the two agencies. It became clearly, early on, that she was not capable of maintaining a professional work environment. 
In 1992, when Ms. Morley revealed that she was pregnant, she was immediately placed on desk duty. During a meeting with her direct chain of command, Ms. Morley intentionally concealed the identity of her child’s father. When questioned about Mr. Peña, she blatantly denied that she had any sexual contact with her partner. The following year, when Ms. Morley and Mr. Peña provided the DEA with the truth, we were forced to terminate her employment for her misconduct. 
While The Post may attempt to twist this situation into a gender-based discrimination case, it is abundantly clear that both Ms. Morley and Mr. Peña engaged in unethical practices unbefitting of federal agents. 
The Post reached out to CIA Agent, Lance Collier, who Ms. Morley was in a relationship from June 1988 to June 1989, clarified that their relationship had been approved by his director prior to its beginning. 
Collier was willing to go on record with a statement of his own, “Annie was one of the hardest working agents I’ve ever worked with. During meetings, I repeatedly witnessed her being ignored and silenced by her superiors. They would ultimately use her knowledge under the guise of their own, intentionally undermining her abilities. On numerous occasions, I was also present for meetings where Javier Peña and Steve Murphy would go to bat for their partner. Annie was well aware of the risk and complications related to being a woman in a male dominated field, and despite that she persisted. I have seen men who acted as bad agents against our government still be venerated, so why are they still punishing her for becoming a mother?”
The Post is dedicated to the continued investigation of this scandal. 
 ————
 “You’re brooding.” You told Javier as you shut off the stove and grabbed a trivet to sit the pot of wild rice off the burner. 
Javier huffed, folding his arms across his chest as he leaned against the kitchen counter across from you. “I’m not brooding.” He rubbed at the back of his neck before he pushed away from the counter and moved to grab two plates out of the cabinet. “The timing was just less than ideal.” 
“I know.” You grabbed an oven mitt and pulled out the pan of chicken patties, sitting it on the stovetop. “I wish Vickers had told us how thorough Valerie was going to be in her statement to the paper.” 
“It was fucking mortifying, baby. I don’t know how I’m gonna make it through exams next week. Think it’s too late to make it a paper?” He questioned, grabbing the buns and mayonnaise out of the fridge. 
“Unfortunately,” You made a face as you shut off the oven and moved to grab a paper plate to cut the tomato on. “It’ll blow over.” 
“Not nearly soon enough,” He shook his head. “You know how much I hate looking back on that shit and now everyone knows my business.” 
“It was a risk we were both willing to take,” You reminded him. “Say the word and we pull the plug.” 
“I’m not pulling the fucking plug, baby. I’m just saying — did my class really need to know about my exploits with hookers in Colombia? I get that it’s tantalizing, but she pushed it too far.” 
“Even Elena didn’t realize how far it would go,” You sat the knife down and wiped off your hands on a dishtowel, turning to approach him. “I’m sure the DEA thought they could put a wedge between us — like I didn't know what you got up to.” 
“You talked to Elena today?”
You nodded, “I called to thank her. Her word would’ve been enough I think, but having two ‘Jane Smiths’ reaffirm what she was saying? There’s so much bullshit going on, in the pursuit of stopping drugs that has to end. We both know how they abuse those women.” You reached up and brushed your fingers over his cheek, leaning up on your toes to kiss him. 
He snaked his arm around your waist, pulling you towards him. “Think they’ll try to track down Matias next?” 
You let out an incredulous laugh at that, “God, I don’t even know what happened to him.” You admitted, “I doubt they’d be able to track him down.” He had been a sweet young man you’d spent a handful of evenings with in the pursuit of intel nearly a decade ago. “It’s not like you don’t know.” 
Javier dragged his teeth over his bottom lip and nodded slowly, “It’s just fucking bullshit. Even if it exonerated us.” He sighed heavily, “I should’ve cancelled class. Standing up there trying to keep on topic — knowing they’ve just read an article with three women who I’ve fucked.”
“Technically five.” You pointed, clarifying when he arched a brow.  “Elena, Valerie, and Mia, Lorraine, and myself.” 
He made a face, feigning disgust before he released you. “I hadn’t realized the DEA would be so determined to punch below the belt.”
“Because bribing Monica to say you’d fucked her was above the belt?” You pointed out as you moved to grab two buns out of the bag, throwing them on the plates and using a spatula to pick up the chicken patties and place them on each bun. 
“Alright, alright. You’re making valid points.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “One day the girls are going to see these articles.” 
“Then we’ll explain to them that sex workers deserve more praise and credit than they’re currently afforded.” You stated simply, “And that there’s nothing wrong about being sexually active — like we were, before we got together.” You shrugged. 
“You wanna have that conversation with them?”
You shrugged, licking your thumb clean after you got mayonnaise on it, “Sure. It doesn’t bother me.” 
Javier pinched at the bridge of his nose for a moment before he started plating up his chicken sandwich, “You got cheese?”
“Hang on,” You headed for the fridge, pulling the door open and rummaging around in the deli drawer. “Swiss or cheddar?”
“Do we have any of the pepperjack left?”
You hummed as you pulled open a drawer below, grabbing the bag of pepperjack cheese. “You’re in luck. I hid it the last time Nadia was here.” You tossed it onto the counter beside him, “That girl loves cheese.” 
“Monica wasn’t in class today,” Javier stated, throwing two pieces of cheese onto his chicken patty before topping it off with the bun, “Did you hear from her today? I meant to call but got pulled into meetings.” 
“I called her this morning at work,” You told him as you stowed the mayo back in the fridge. “She’s still pretty skittish after everything that happened.” You explained, smiling when you returned to your plate and Javier had scooped up a spoonful of wild rice for you. “Thanks, babe.” 
He pressed a kiss to your cheek, “Anytime.” Javier gave your ass a playful swat before he headed for the kitchen table. “She’s got office hours with me tomorrow.” 
“I wouldn’t make a big deal about it,” You cautioned him as you sat down across from him at the table. “Honestly, she seemed fine. She just wanted to skip today.” You took a bite of your sandwich, before washing it down with a swig of beer. “I can’t wait for all of this to be over with.” 
“You and me both, baby.” Javier retorted, covering his mouth with his fist as he spoke with his mouth full. “I want them to fucking pay for their bullshit and let us get on with our lives.” 
You nodded your head slowly, “Everyone at the P.D. has been so supportive. They’re far from perfect, but they at least recognize what the DEA’s been doing is morally and ethically wrong.” 
Javier rocked his jaw slowly as he stared at you across the table, “You still thinking about quitting?”
“All the time,” You admitted with a shrug. “I just want to get through this first. The DEA’s been such a dark shadow for so many years.” 
“Once this is over, I feel like we’ll be able to really live.” 
“Right?” You agreed with a grin, “Connie thinks we should go on vacation.” 
“As soon as this semester’s over.” 
You leaned across the table and took his hand into yours, giving it three short squeezes. “There’s a part of me that is stupidly excited about my name finally being attached to yours in the record books. And Steve’s, of course. It’s bizarre to see our lives laid out in the newspaper, but at the same time — I love it.” 
“Me too, baby.” Javier grinned at you, “It means no more hiding.” 
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jadevassr · 4 years
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JADE VASSER -- YATES TASK 003
BASICS
Full Name: Jade Elena Vasser
Meaning of Name: Stone of the side
Nickname: n/a, Jadie but she doesn’t love it
Birth Date: September 27, 1998
Astrological Sign and Details: Libra sun Aries Moon
Birth Place: Ashfield, Massachusetts
Age: 21
Nationality: American
Race: White
Hair Color: Brown
Hair Style: Wavy
Distinct Features of Face: Big eyes, small nose, American Girl doll teeth (lol)
Glasses or Contacts: No
Eye Color: Blue
Scars or Distinguishing Marks: n/a
Build or Body Type: slender
Height: 5′8
Weight: 120 lbs.
Speech Patterns: Stutters when she gets excited, sounds like Violet from the Incredibles
Tag Words: Any expletive
Gestures: Blinks a lot, talks with her hands, touchy
Weakness: Anything addictive
FAMILY AND CHILDHOOD
Mother: Martha Vasser
Father: David Vasser
Mother’s Occupation: Nurse
Father’s Occupation: Carpenter
Family Finances: Lower-class for most of her adolescence, doing just okay as of now
Birth Order: Youngest
Brothers: One - Logan Vasser
Other Close Family: Probably cousins!
Best Friend: UhhhHHHH
Other Friends: Winthrop and Kincaid students
Enemies: Everyone else
Pets: A stray cat named Marvin
Home Life During Childhood: She was a wild child! Oopsie! She constantly got into trouble and her parents never knew what the fuck to do. This is partly because of her mental illnesses. She had only gotten treated for ADHD as a child because of her hyperactivity, though her experience with medication fluctuates constantly. She very much didn’t care about school and was an Amma Preaker/tomboy type as a child and a wildcard as a teen.
Town or City Name(s) Where They’ve Live: Ashfield, MA
What Did His, Her or Their Bedroom Look Like: Covered in posters and pictures and drawings. Trinkets everywhere.
Any Sports or Clubs: Yearbook, soccer for a year before she injured another girl on purpose.
Favorite Toy or Game: Furbies
Schooling: Ashfield High, currently at Yates
Favorite Subject: English, Art
Popular or Loner: Loner
Important Experiences or Events: Got sexual assaulted in the woods when she was 14 by a few boys, had a couple similar experiences while casually dating in high school. Accidentally burning a man alive when she burnt down an abandoned church house while she was having a bad acid trip.
Health Problems: Untreated mental illnesses. Most likely BPD.
Religion and beliefs: Agnostic
PERSONAL
Bad Habits: Drinking, drugs, cigarettes, irregular sleep patterns
Good Habits: Creates often
Best Characteristic: Passionate
Worst Characteristic: Obsessive, off-putting
Worst Memory: See above
Best Memory: Being seven years old. Her childhood when her brother was her best friend.
Proud of: her art
Embarrassed by: her entire personality. She does not admit this.
Driving Style: Reckless but has a good record after mildly blackmailing the local cops via connections.
Attitude: Volatile. Often too eccentric. Generally energetic.
Fears: Losing control
Phobias: n/a
Secrets: See above
Regrets: See above
Feels Vulnerable When: she has to express her feelings with someone
Pet Peeves: Republicans, neoliberals, styrofoam, bad interior design, emails.
Short Term Goals and Hopes: Surviving
Long Term Goals and Hopes: Surviving
Sexuality: Bisexual
Exercise Routine: Skateboarding and eating shit
Day or Night Person: Both
Introvert or Extrovert: Extrovert
Optimist or Pessimist: Pessimist
LIKES AND PREFERENCES
Music: Experimental/electronic, 90s indie rock, pop music, etc.
Foods: Pasta!
Drinks: Cherry coke, coffee
Animals: Tigers, red pandas
Color: Red
Clothing: Lots of colors, big t-shirts, switches between 70s to 90s to Y2K
Jewelry: Weird earrings, lots of rings
TV Shows: Lots of anime, Twin Peaks, The X Files, Love Island
Movies: Daisies, House, Carrie, American Honey
Greatest Want: To be understood
Greatest Need: A reality check and therapy <3
LIFESTYLE
Favorite Possession: Her guitar
Significant Other Before: Fitz Montgomery (lol)
Relationship with Family: Civil... perhaps
Dream Career: Photographer/Artist
Dream Life: Travel around the world
Love Life: Confusing
Hobbies: Photography, drawing, making music, playing bass
Guilty Pleasure: Slim jims and gross energy drinks
Talents or Skills: This is random but she’s like very good at coding. She’s no programmer but this is something she picked up one time when she was bored. She’s also very good at (See Hobbies) and lying <3
Intelligence Level: Very smart! Surprisingly passionate but thinks academia is a scam
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