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#im incredibly proud of myself and grateful for her. and my reiki lady she’s also been a great great help.
8rujaa
·
17 days
Text
my therapist really saved me….
#tw abuse // tw sa
#i can’t sleep bc i keep thinking about this.
#like i probably would’ve not been here if it weren’t for her
#i started seeing her january of 2023… my life has changed entirely since then and she was definitely the one who got the ball rolling
#literally so much has changed since then and it’s all because of her
#i was so dissociated during our first few sessions
#thanks to her i was able to get diagnosed and medicated for adhd. i was able to realize i was in an abusive situation and plan a way out
#i was able to focus on myself and my healing and she’s helped me reframe so much of my negative thinking
#i was able to process a lot of emotions and become a better version of myself with each session
#she’s truly incredible.
#i remember the first comment she made about the relationship had been ‘’so it’s like there’s an imbalance of control in the relationship’’
#i had put my partners on such a high pedestal that i had no idea they could be doing anything wrong
#and i asked her what she meant and she said ‘from what you’ve been describing it’s sounds like a strict parents and child type of dynamic’
#she told me they didn’t need to understand why i wanted to leave and they didn’t need to make that decision. if that’s what was going to be
#best for me the only thing i could do is let them know my reasoning and simply leave. i didn’t need their permission.’’
#i remember being so confused at that realization bc like… i had been putting their emotions over mine the whole time i had forgotten simply
#doing what’s best for me was an option… l
#ever since then i’ve been putting myself first and it’s been a steady uphill from rock bottom… i’ve made an incredible amount of progress
#when i first started with her getting out of bed and walking to the kitchen was incredibly difficult and took all my strength.
#yesterday i conquered a mountain!!!!!!! i hiked all the way to the top!!!!! :D
#me a year ago thought it was going to take me years and years to recover. as soon as i left i made leaps of progress
#im incredibly proud of myself and grateful for her. and my reiki lady she’s also been a great great help.
#the silver lining is i realized who really matters. and the relationships i cared about deepened.
#my sweet virgo friend was the one who was always like ‘THATS A GROWN ASS MAN WHO CANT UNDERSTAND BASIC CONSENT???’
#LMFAO i would be like ‘but he has trauma and bla bla bla’ she looked me dead in the eyes and said
#’jess you said with your last boyfriend that you would never make excuses for a man who was hurting you again. stop defending him.’
#she’s really a gem and i treasure her with my life. i hope she knows i love her. she’s family at this point
#she’s also literally saved my life before (like deadass called 911 for help)
#im glad i had the support system i had. that was a rough situation with so many layers and im glad i got through it
#my 22nd year of life was by far the worst of my life and i don’t ever want to put myself in that situation again. im glad i learned.
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