#im dying to talk about bruharvey they mean so so so much to me ESP THIS AU HELLO?!?!?!

[bruciemilf]

Imagine Harvey dent sneaking into Wayne manor after another gang fight with penguin only for Civilian!Bruce to be in those slutty ass black night gowns glaring at him from the steps of the manor waiting for his husband to get home.

Aka I would like to offer you chaotic civilian billionaire bruce and his very tired mob! boss husband.

Harvey dent fears no man expect the wrath of his husband, imagine trying to take down Twoface and failing only for him to be brought down by his tiny and very angry husband lecturing him on missing another date.

They also most definitely had a "excuse my husband asked fr no pickels" moment

I'm sorry I really needed to share this idea that's been rotting in my brain.

NO, BUT THIS IS SO IMPORTANT. Vital. We should be talking about this until time dies.

Bruce being a civilian and STILL marrying one of the most notorious criminals without any qualms is possibly the most take ever.

He's invited to brunches and galas and pretentious pool parties where everyone eats tiny sandwiches and talk about wanting to poison their husbands soon.

Bruce sighs all dreamy, eyes sparkling, " I gave Harvey a bazooka for his birthday and he was so happy he blew up the police station. He knows me so well."

Not to mention, Two Face's street credit fluctuates between flourishing and absolutely tanking.

He'll have some poor bastard ankles up, dangling above the white sharks he bought for Damian's birthday, and in the middle of his Menacing speech, his phone rings.

"And when you see God, tell him I -- Oh. Wait a minute. Mi vida, I'm doing something right now."

There's some mild phone gibberish.

"No, I didn't forget, I'm just gonna be a little late, -- Of course I know he wants me to be there, doll, but I just, -- oh come on, he's 5! Of COURSE he wants a theme park! Yes, it has to be a Wonder Woman one. Cause he said please!"

More phone gibberish, louder this time.

" Okay. I know, I know, I love you too. And you wear that lacey thing when I get home, huh?" Okay, now the sharks are preferable. Poor bastard who thought it was acceptable to kidnap Bruce Wayne and his son prefer it.

"Uh, you can just go ahead and drop me."

Harvey looks down at him with blade like sharpness, and you don't know which face you're talking to. " Drop you? Nah. Waitin' for my doll to come over here. You're my anniversary gift, pal."

#tHEM #ANON YOU MADE MY DAY #im dying to talk about bruharvey they mean so so so much to me ESP THIS AU HELLO?!?!?! #bruce wayne #dc #dc comics #bruce doesnt kill. he does however injure and maims for his kids <3 #harvey dent #bruharvey #twobats #bruce x harvey #text #text post #my writing