#idk me projecting my philosophy about friendship yet again

[lord-squiggletits]

Like fundamentally my Pharma apologism is basically just flipping the script and making Pharma the protagonist instead so that "crazy mad doctor torturing Ratchet the good Autobot" is instead flipped around to "Heavily traumatized ex(?) Autobot gets revenge on his best friend killing him/leaving him for dead and stealing his body parts."

Honestly I feel like the one misconception that ppl have that makes their interpretations of Pharma or Pharma and Ratchet interactions really bad, is that too many ppl in the fandom treat(ed) Pharma like some random creepy stalker that barely even knew Ratchet, as opposed to Ratchet's literal best friend that only lost contact with him right before Earth events happened (so basically after 4+ million years of friendship they hadn't seen each other for like...2 years tops which is nothing in the average Cybertronian lifespan). Though I can't blame them because sometimes the narrative likes to forget that too in terms of acting like Pharma is solely in the wrong/everything Ratchet did to hurt him was deserved bc Pharma killed people and was stupid/arrogant/shallow.

Like ppl have GOT to understand that Pharma and Ratchet were best friends since before the war started. For reference that would make the length of their friendship comparable to Ratchet and OP's friendship. Which means they would've been REALLY FUCKING CLOSE, not that you really have to read between the lines to see that when Ratchet himself mentions how he and Pharma used to talk late into the night together.

So when Pharma is obsessed with Ratchet, it's not bc he's some delusional stalker who doesn't even know him and is just projecting all of his hates/desires onto Ratchet. It's because they were literally lifelong friends that only broke up/fell out of contact like a year prior. Pharma DOES know Ratchet. He DOES have a meaningful relationship with him. He DOES have the right to be pissed off at Ratchet because a lifelong friendship gives Pharma a claim to Ratchet's regard. Not in a "oh you HAVE to stay friends with me" kind of way, but in a betrayal sense of "oh you did me DIRTY for someone who used to call me his best friend." Imo there's an obligation between lifelong friends where if you hurt them or break up with them, it's a serious deal and you can't treat them like a stranger just bc you hate them

#squiggposting #idk me projecting my philosophy about friendship yet again #pharma apologism #the narrative of m/mtte really wants you to forget that they were best friendols #or at least think that their friendship means nothing for how ratchet should treat pharma #which is fucked up imo bc there are friends that i have/had #where even if we were no longer friends i wouldnt suddenly find it acceptable to like. hurt them #the weight of our former friendship is such that i respect them even if we're no longer friends #so anyways pharma is not 'obsessed' or 'stalking' ratchet #he's a spurned and betrayed best friend seeking revenge on the guy who killed him #(or put him in a situation where he would die) #something about friendship as a sacred bond where some ways of breaking it #arent merely 'parting ways' but a betrayal of treating someone you love as an enemy

[captaingondolin]

those are too many wips. 

here’s a list with brief summaries, and then you can tell me what to finish first because i am suffering from big time choice paralysis. anon is on. ask away.

ace Obi-Wan vague idea: what it says on the tin. it was going to involve teen Obi-Wan, friendship with Quinlan and Luminara. in which Obi-Wan is interested in sex... in theory. academically. he’s his suave, charming self, and will experiment for the hell of it. (i was slightly uncomfortable with the premise of, basically, a fic about an asexual character all about... well, sex. but i wanted to work some shit out and what better way than overprojecting over fictional characters?)

Anakin in lingerie: just polishing up an old tumblr post. modern AU.

Anakin in makeup obianidala: again from an old post with subskywalker. but i wanted to give it a structure

Ani5dala FIX IT: OH MAN I WAS SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS. i have tons of notes and no energy to proceed. in which Fox has a plan to keep Fives alive, Fives has a plan to keep the Republic alive - but Anakin is being a butt and Fives needs Pamé’s help. (probably Anakin and Fives were together before? + anidala open relationship, i was thinking, but idk yet)

AWOL Cody: oh boy, i started plotting this for my pod-together 2018 project with litra. in which Obi-Wan is declared KIA, but there is NO BODY and also suspicious footage/Ahsoka saw something and Cody is NOT having it so he goes on a solo mission to save him. codywan.

Darkness is but a passing thing: same as above, it was supposed to be written in 2018, good grief. post rots, sort of time-travellish, i’m not saying more bc most of the plot was litra’s and idk if she wants to share.

Detonate: translation into english of my italian obikin smut, which i promised ages ago.

enemies to colleagues to lovers codywan: this, but with a proper outline this is now being Properly Plotted. there are mindmaps. and a Scrivener file.

Jedi OC: from a prompt from last year’s rarepair exchange: Male Jedi Who Accidentally Keeps Causing Property Damage/Male Owner of Said Property (words written: 0, but the idea was funny)

Laurea traduzione: eng translation of my italian modern au obikin

Leia using the Force: a messy messy file with more than one idea in, actually. i wasn’t sure wether to go with child or teen Leia (post Princess of Alderaan plot) but then i got distracted with making Leia and Kaeden meet. Ahsoka/Kaeden.

million: from a fic exchange request in which someone said they’d read “a million words” of Bly and Aayla being disgustingly in love. just that. with a side of codywan (the irony of Bly being all like “ugh, THOSE TWO” fuelled the first few hundred words).

obianidala with nb Anakin: wait, isn’t this kinda related to the Anakin in makeup one? my plotbunnies are a mess. maybe from this or this post.

ObiBail Empire Era AND OR others: frankly. a disaster mess probably inspired by the beginning of Til the casket drops and Wild Space.

ObiBail obianidala Breha super poly dinner: this post, but in fic form

ObiBailRex: this one is funny. i found the first few sentences handwritten in a notebook and i have no memory of where i wanted to go from there, but damn, i liked those. Obi-Wan forces Cody to take some leave, and Cody forces Rex to play babysitter to his General and his Senator friend. shenanigans ensue.

storms: ahahah, another fic pending since..... uuuh...... the clone wars exchange from, again, 2018? (how much shit did i sign up for that summer? i was in the midst of moving!! why am i like this). sorry perspicacia, if you’re even still around. preparing for that fic was how i got in to obi/rex tho? and it still doesn’t have a plot.

unhinged Obi-Wan vs Grievous: this, but with a plot. if i can find the plot. why is plotting so hard? no plotting, only cool scenes. (sith/fallen!obi getting the 212th to follow him and go rogue?? maybe?) see “enemies to colleagues to lovers” above

when the numbers get to zero: a Rex/Padmé i love a lot but that, as usual with ALL my damn fic, has no structure. inspired by the blue shadow virus eps. (i posted a snippet ages ago - oh wait, here’s another one)

now onto the folders!

keep verse

untitled about other Clones finding out, and the consequences. “It’s Bly who finds out first through the GAR grapevine. Cody was supposed to be dead - and suddenly he wasn’t.”

Pilots (ot era)

Oblivious Pilots - The entire Rogue Squadron is made of oblivious disasters. They share one braincell, and Nawara is the only one who’s actually using it. 

Dark Imperial AU - Luke is raised by Vader. but when he meets Wedge and Tycho...

Skystrike Academy AU - Luke is raised by Owen, Beru... and Obi-Wan. And he signs up to train as TIE pilot as part of a Resistance plan

WedgeTycho - the tiniest spark of an idea. Alderanian philosophy, Tycho being pretentious, sad, grieving, and in need of a hug.

SitS - A Light from the Shadows

SitS stands for “the Sith in the Senate”, the working title for this epic I’ve been plotting since 2018 that might never see the light because I went “I want a well-adjusted, non traumatised Obi-Wan!”, build a whole new canon around that ......and then got bored of it, obviously, since I love to see Obes suffer. but there were tons of things I liked and maybe I should rework it somehow? (it was supposed to be obikin. then obianidala. then i think i got distracted and got Cody to flirt with Obi-Wan. who knows at this point. what if I throw in Jango)

soft now verse

parts 2.1 and 2.2 are there and almost ready and filled with clones feels (yes, this was a fix it obianidala fluff, but CLONES)

Space Dads Extraordinaire

Hope in Unexpected Places pt 2 and maybe 3 or maybe that’s a separate story? I have feelings about smol Boba interacting with Obi-Wan and learning to trust him, but don’t know how to handle them. There should also be the bit where they find Jango’s pet strill, which I promised to Lulu like a year ago.

the life and opinions

this is a cursed title, i started a fic with a similar title in another fandom almost 15 years ago and never finished it. it was supposed to be a biography of Rex and his rise through the ranks and into an AU where the vode have their own governing body. a shitton of Rex and Cody brotherly feels but maybe also ship? why can’t i pick a dynamic

Thrawn

browser history - Thranto moments told through Eli’s holonet searches

your silence is my favourite word - Emperor Eli angsty smut

new rules - Emperor Eli AU, but make it reasonably happy

see me like this - Emperor Eli AU, angst cranked up to the max

bb Thrawn - Thranto AU in which Thrawn is a weird child, the Chiss have some more contact with humans and Eli & Thrawn meet as kids

forgotten words - Thrawn growing up in the Empire, raised by Palpatine. 

#gondolin writes #too much and not enough at once #wip tag #my tag #long post #hoping the cut works

[solienna]

i was going to be like 'all of them' but that would be mean so instead im 'just' going to ask for 1, 4, 8, 10, 13, 17, 21, 28, 32, 33, 35, 47, 50,

putting this under a readmore bc meander!!! you spoil me

01: When did you first start writing?      okay i actually am gonna give you two answers to this question bc i feel like i started writing at two periods in my life. the first time i actually started writing was in third grade because i had like. the BEST third grade teacher, he was awesome and in my eyes was like, the best artist i had ever met just bc he had a basic grasp of how to draw shit and i absolutely didn’t and still don’t, every time teachers tell me to draw things for an assignment i lose ten years off my lifespan but anyways!! off topic. he really encouraged creativity and i was in a class with one of my friends, his name was like john or michael or something, and i would write and he would illustrate (i thought he was the second-best artist i had ever met just bc he also had a basic grasp on drawing and i still didn’t). i wrote about like. this dog and his name was super yuff and got his powers through lightning that struck him and he just flew around and like. idk he did a lot of shit, i still have the stories i wrote. but like i was DEDICATED to this character and so was my illustrator friend. i remember one weekend i was just sitting on my bed with a bunch of folded up printer paper just writing about this dumb superhero dog that somehow ended up in like the halo universe bc even back then i was obsessed with video games. that was the first thing i actually WROTE.         HOWEVER. after third grade i just took a huge break. like not intentionally, of course. i loved writing but i didn’t know it was my THING yet. i didn’t really have a thing yet, it was only third grade ok. HOWEVER. when i transitioned into middle school that’s when i picked up writing again. i don’t even remember why. all i know was that my dad had bought skyrim and he was playing it and just by watching it i LOVED it. i adored the history behind the game and i just loved the graphics, and when i started playing the game i got HOOKED. stayed up entire nights just doing random side quests for npcs and feeling a huge goddamn hero, let me save this talking dog from the wrath of his daedric master nbd, just doing my job, let me set all these beehives on fire and get mauled by a bear, cool cool. and one day i just? was like wow, why don’t i write a story about it! about my skyrim OC going to solstheim and falling in love with the aloof nd really sarcastic and interesting teldryn sero (who still remains one of my favorite skyrim npcs to this day)!! and i thought i was Hot Shit too, i thought i fucking invented fanfiction. and then i found wattpad and then that was that folks, i got hooked on writing all over again and i still am

04: Have you ever thrown a book across the room?      mmmm not that i can recall? i’m not really a book-thrower, i’m more of a book-holder. like if something really shocking happens in a book i feel like i’d be more likely to hug it close to my chest than throw it08: What’s the best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten?      tbh pretty much everything you’ve told me meander!! i don’t really think i’d be writing that much if not for you. honestly you flatter me on a daily basis with your compliments about my really pretentious use of metaphors in like every single paragraph and basically just with your interest in all of my writing projects even for fandoms you’re not technically in!! i’ve never really been told by anyone that i’ve got a way with words and when you told me that i was like wow!! people actually like the shit i write, that’s cool! that’s real cool my guy10: What’s your biggest writer pet-peeve?      honestly i THRIVE on feedback. i took a huge writing break like a few years ago just because i couldn’t WRITE the way i used to. to just sit down and spew out 5000 word chapters on a whim wasn’t something i could feasibly DO anymore. i thought i lost my touch or something but it was honestly just because i didn’t get enough feedback. again shout out to u meander because you legit FLOODED me with feedback on like. everything. i’m still over the moon about half the shit you’ve told me like a year ago. tbh half the reason i yell in the tags is because creators read the tags!! they really do!! so i wanna leave some positive feedback for them because i want them to know that i liked whatever it was that they made!!

13: What’s your favorite writing quote?       it’s not really a writing quote but!! “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” -C.S. Lewis21: Do you outline?      i honestly burst out laughing when i saw this question, i do not in any way whatsoever outline anything bc apparently i hate myself. ok the last time i outlined a story was like four years ago and it worked…. really well…… so for some reason i was like wow how about we not make our lives easier. no outlining our fics we ruin our own writing projects like men

28: Which do you find hardest: the beginning, the middle, or the end?      everything, everything is hard, i can’t write in a linear fashion. nah but tbh i feel like it’s the middle? like what do you even do. what is the middle all about. i’ve never met her32: How do you feel about friends and close relatives reading your work?      ABSOLUTELY NOT. get them away. i am very protective of my writing bc it’s personal to me. like i don’t want y’all reading my shit and then going up to me in real life thinking you know all my secrets bc if u read my shit you WILL know all my secrets, i painstakingly pour my heart into everything i write because in everything i do, i try REALLY REALLY hard. if i let u read my writing it’s a show of trust33: Are you interested in having your work published?      in its current state? probably not!! maybe later on down the road would be nice, but i’ve still got a lot to learn //side-eyes all my failed attempts at witty dialogue35: What’s your favorite time of day for writing?      nighttime. like dead of the night, i’m in bed with my phone and should be asleep right now but instead i’m gonna grab my laptop and fucking dump out all the words in my brain onto this word document. other than that i honestly just write during school a lot? like when we get free time i’m either studying for a test or writing.47: If you could steal one character from another author and make then yours, who would it be and why?      i want to take preston garvey out of bethesda’s hands. i’ve fallen in love with him over the course of just writing one scene for his character study. it’s the second-to-last scene (bc i cant write in linear order) and like. gosh. i want him to be my character, he’s so sad but also so optimistic and he tries so hard. ok those kinds of characters are my Type, i love characters who try really hard 

50: If you could live in any fictional world, which would it be?      i’m honestly not really sure? like hardcore i love daydreaming but it’s never about myself doing cool things, it’s about characters doing cool things. i kinda wanna meet an omnic tho, they seem really chill. maybe like live in falkreath? it’s really chill and pretty there and the mountains are really looming and i like that. imagine meeting the dragonborn and they buy out your entire store and then just leave. thats fucking crazy my guy

#ask #my post #about #meander #here's a wall of text meander i hope u enjoy it