#i've been fucking dead damn

[stopwatchclockwatch]

It's been a minute, so i bless you all with MetaGala!

#kirby #galacta knight #meta knight #metagala #i've been fucking dead damn #haven't had the motivation to draw for a good week and distracted with drawing smth else #so it's been a good minute

[dollypopup]

y'all can all cancel me (again) for this, but if there's even a SHRED of 'who should I pick?' from Penelope in season 3, I am tuning out SO fast because like. . .sorry not sorry, there IS no choice. Debling is some crusty OC suitor she barely even knows and Colin is a man who she has been so supposedly in love with to the point where she'd ruin her entire family's reputation to have a potential love story with him. Penelope and Colin have background, years of knowing each other, intimacy that few people in the Ton can boast of having (letters, conversations about purpose, fights and arguments and makeups) and her and Debling have. . .a dance or two at a ball because he's a rebound for Penelope's broken heart. he means nothing. he has no nuance, he has no weight to the story, he is such an afterthought to me. either I wanna see Penelope going 'you know what? I don't even LIKE this dude. he's. . .fine, but I don't care about him even a shred as much as I care about Colin' or the INSTANT Colin's like 'you know what? we should get married' if it's not an immediate 'say less, you're already my husband, try returning me without the receipt, Debling whomst?' then I don't want it!

like. . .it's just so frustrating to see all the 'I hope Debling sweeps her off her feet and she rejects Colin's proposal and she makes him work for it and and and-' nonsense from the fandom and it's always tagged and no matter how many times I block it, it just keeps popping up. I go into the Polin tag for POLIN. I don't give a SHIT about a male love interest other than Colin. Not one. Not a shred. Not an iota.

and also. . .Debling has the 'benefit' of not having depth, or character traits, or HISTORY, so peeps can project onto him however they want, but I'm calling it now, there is NOTHING he could do or be that would make me like him more than Colin. Colin will always hit different, and I will always love him more. and if Pen's not on that same page? lol bye

you want me to believe Penelope and Colin are soulmates and it's romance for her to hem and haw about how difficult a decision it is for her to marry a stranger who knows barely anything about her. . .

when Marina was out here dropping banger lines like 'You were the only man with which I could see myself being happy' and 'I do not care about any of these men, where is Colin?'? like hello??? and she wasn't even fully in love with him!!!! but we'll demonize her until the cows come home in our fandom and make her the villain in Polin's love story for DARING to get in between Polin, yet Debling, a white man, is a darling dear perfect prince for getting in between Polin? existing in our fandom solely so Penelope can be like 'lol, Colin ain't shit, let me entertain any and everyone else'?

if that's the direction it goes then, ten toes down and on my mama, she doesn't deserve Colin and she can move because I'm on my way to court him my damn self

and that's that on that

#you know what? lol it's been a bit since i've posted a controversial opinion #tagging it #polin #sorry not sorry i ship polin. . .so i wanna see. . .polin. . .and i'm getting damn sick and tired #of all the bullshit pen/oc pen/other dude theories and stories in the polin tag #and i don't want polin to lose screentime over a frankly bleh male oc #you can't change my mind #if i don't see at least marina's 'you've seen him with the little bridgertons!' level of squee and 'i only want to talk to colin' #levels of devotion then i don't fucking WANT IT!!!!! #yeah definitely try out the marriage market #realize that NO ONE has a good time on the marriage market #try to get over him w/ whomstever #but then be like 'i don't even LIKE this dude where's colin i miss him' about it!!!!! #because otherwise i am not here #i am asleep #and i am courting colin in your place pen #i'm coming for your man #anti debling #if debling has 100 haters i am one of them if he has 10 haters i'm one of them if he has 1 hater i am the hater if he has 0 haters i'm dead #it's incredibly obvious that 'pebling' is half rooted in a revenge storyline fueled by anger at Colin and his complexity #and half a projection of wanting Penelope to have 'choices' because she is a representation and manifestation of the fans themselves #and so people think an OC that can be 'perfect' for them- whoops I mean Pen (because he doesn't have any real depth or interest) #he's a cardboard cutout we can throw whatever you want onto #so we can make him 'perfect' instead of the much more meaningful storyline of pen and colin both being messy and loving each other more #and part of it is bitterness over Polin not being insta-love #which. . .if it was i wouldn't like them as much as i do #anyways y'all ain't slick #and it's fucking WEIRD to be in a fandom that's like 'i ship this couple but i hope she gets with ANYONE else' #maybe you. . .don't ship the couple?? #like. . .to the point of wanting her necklace to be from debling. . .and her wearing it everywhere??? WHAT??

[bumblebeebats]

One thing that I really admire in long-form storytelling is when the writers/showrunners/etc. aren't afraid to make Big and Permanent Changes. There are so many series that I've eventually fallen out of love with simply because everything stays the SAME - no one ages, no one dies, no character arcs feel like they're ever really resolved. Sure, maybe shit gets shaken up for an arc or two, but eventually everything returns to the status quo. It feels like being fed the same dish over and over again; you liked this in S1, so surely you want the exact same thing now in S7???

And like, I can SEE where it's coming from. A story is a huge and finely-tuned machine, and it takes guts to just throw a wrench in the works, especially if your audience loved it the way it was to begin with. Any change, even the good kind (going off to college! Getting that job you wanted!) comes with grief. (What about your family - your friends - that old corner store across from your house with the ice cream you loved? That one coworker who you were kind-of-sort-of buddies with, but not enough to properly stay in touch?) But that's just life. And that's why I feel like I connect far more with stories that actually evolve, and show their characters evolving with them. Your mother dies. Your best friend loses their magic. You lose your sword arm. Your home burns down. None of it is coming back. The old times were good - but the new times can be good too, in a different way.

#Yes I've been thinking incredibly deeply about Adventure Time why do you ask #But also plenty other stories too #Like not to praise Joss Whedon's writing but: In BTVS when Buffy's mother fucking died??? damn!!!! #You're 19 years old. You're an incredibly powerful slayer of demons. You've been through literal hell and saved the world dozens of times. #You come home and your mother is dead. Of something so stupid and mundane as an aneurysm. You never got to say goodbye. And you never will #like what the fuck!! that's so good!!!! who put this trauma in my camp vampire series!! My 14yo ass was FLOORED #Anyway #writing #charlie speaks

[bogbees]

absolutely fascinating when dead characters get insane ammount of love and their ships are the most popular ships in that fandom.

this is NOT ab white boy of the year eddie munson. this is ab Rengoku Kyojouro who i still can't believe is so popular his face is on a plane. fire boy set Japan's heart ablaze and they haven't stopped caring since. absolutely amazing

#bogs' muttering #see rentan ain't popular in the west for an understandable reason but also like hot damn the east fucking loves that ship #i love that ship #it's perfect in every wat #it's got my dead guy quota and a speech ab the heart (ish) and and and one guy's flower is sunflowers!! #coal selling in the mountains with a big happy family contrasting with a long line of flame symbolism with a miserable family #coal to fire to sun god fuck it makes me insane #they're both the eldest son!! they're both virgin nerds bc of it!!! they both understand loss of a loved one!!!!! #I'm so unwell I've been unwell since at least mid july fuck me #they live in my brain rent free #fuck they're even best friends as descendant reincarnation!!! smiling and laughing together!!!!!!!!!! and their ancestors were bffs!!!! #rengoku is fire bc his ancestor knew Tanjiro's ancestor the sun!!! #there's so much fuckinh nonsense it drives me insane

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Thinking about Roxy and my Plex Mangle meeting in a way that somewhat mirrors how Mangle met the original Roxy and Mangle just having to deal with that I guess

#fun stuff #mangle just sat there choosing to do things differently this time and it pays off #mangle in the right place at the right time for both of them #i love my plex mangle she's. a fun one for sure lmao #had no expectations on who was gonna be behind the door #and suddenly she's face to face with a smaller slightly different version of her old friend #like god damn she was Not prepared #mangle: been a long time since I've seen a you hah #roxy: I'm an original... there's only one of me... #mangle internally: oh god okay alright back up a sec- #fun! #roxy's not okay! that's a conversation for another day! okay! cool! bold of her to accuse her of murder! #this is fun! she did NOT sign up for this! fuck! #terrible! help! foxy you're a dead man! #lmao it's fun i love them #there's a lot of emotions going on with every canine thats ever been in the plex #and they're not all coping very well lmao #god damn are they not coping very well #i forgot where i was going with this but i love them #it's uh... an interesting situation #very fun

[non-un-topo]

Probably going to take a break from tumblr for a while, at least until my energy and inspiration come back.

#i might not reply to any messages or replies. i've been feeling very antisocial and quiet. #no matter what i do i can't draw or write. my brain feels flat. this fandom is all but dead. i just need some time. #i feel like if i can't draw or write then i don't have a purpose here. so that's a good sign to just take a break. #wish i could channel this grey energy and write another axis. if anything for just myself to read. #i fucking hate november. hope everyone is hanging in there. sláinte. #consider this a friendly reminder to reblog art and comment on fics damn it. or your hardworking creators lose their light like tinkerbell.

[kris-mage-fics]

URL Music

Thanks for tagging me @bi-stander!

K: The Koi Story (锦鲤抄) performed by Jiaju and Zongli

R: Renn by :LOR3L3I:

I: In And Out Of Love by Armin van Buuren feat. Sharon Den Adel

S: Surrender by The Birthday Massacre (cw: lyrics about stalking)

M: Middle Of The Night by Elley Duhé

A: Arise by CLANN

G: Good Behavior by Plumb

E: Everytime We Touch or Evacuate The Dancefloor by Cascada (Sorry I can't choose!)

F: Flower Maiden by Dzivia

I: I Miss You by blink-182 (cw: flashing lights, disturbing imagery, depictions of drowning, and spiders)

C: Concomitance by Anton Belov (bandcamp link since I couldn't find it as a single on youtube)

S: Show Your Fangs by The Crane Wives

By the way, a lot of these videos have the lyrics in the CC, description box, or in one of the top comments. Though I know some of the lyrics for "Good Behavior" are wrong.

Tagging @yuuugay (three U's might be hard, but I believe in you, Yuki!), and @georgiedoesntfloat (I'm sure you'll find some awesome songs!), and anyone who'd like to do this too! (Sorry for not tagging anyone else, I actually did like 96% of this two days ago then my brain decided it couldn't think of more people who like music and it hasn't been cooperating with me since. :/ Did I go overboard with the colors? Idk, but I'm leaving it.)

#I'd say this list is a fairly good representation of my totally random music tastes lol #rip to “Angel” by First Aid Kit which got bumped off because I just found “Arise” this morning and I fucking love CLANN #(I say that as if I've been a fan for a long time when the truth is I found them - and 2/3 of the music on this list - less than a year ago #you can pry cheesy 2000's dance music out of my cold dead hands! it got me through some rough times and it's still fun #is it just me or does “I Miss You” hit harder now than when it came out 20 years ago? wait wtf it came out 20 years ago?!?! haha I'm old #I still have every song on Chaotic Resolve (the album “Good Behavior” is from) memorized I listened to it so much after it came out #if you do look up the other songs on it be aware that “Cut” is about self harm and my take is that “Damaged” is about CSA but it isn't clea #it's the least Christian album from a Christian musician I've ever heard #I have a pretty hard rule to not listen to Christian music from a certain time period ever again but that album is my one exception #(there are good reasons for both the rule and the exception but that's a whole damn post on it's own to explain) #tag game #music

[running-in-the-dark]

oh - when my nephew was here he also told me that my mother said medication doesn't have any effect on hunger.

hahaha that's so fucking funny, I'm gonna scream :)

(was just reminded of this because I feel like I'm starving. because of my new meds. when without them... I don't really feel hungry until many hours after I should have eaten.)

#literally how can you say something so fucking stupid when you have zero experience with it yourself #I mean that's just what she does. always and about everything. but this one is particularly infuriating #I bet it came up because they were talking about my weight. and it wouldn't have been nice :) so that's just. awesome to know. #anyway yeah I literally feel COMPLETELY different when I'm on certain antidepressants. they make me hungry ALL THE TIME. and not slightly #hungry like hm I could eat. nope. so hungry that it feels like I'm starving only a few hours after I've had a meal #but sure! you know better! totally! #and it's LITERALLY in the damn information leaflet as a common side effect. for like three different meds I'm on. but no it's just because #I'm stupid :) #(for context. my mother is the most openly and proudly fatphobic person ever. she will very loudly talk about a fat person's body when they #are only a couple meters away. she hates fat people. so. this isn't a neutral statement coming from her. it's filled with hate and disgust #and I'm fucking sick of this shit. literally I'd feel so much more comfortable in my body if she were dead. it's the biggest hurdle to #getting over my own internalised fatphobia. my first thought is usually something she would say. it fucking sucks.) #tw fatphobia

[headbitchruby]

BRUH THIS IS SUCH BS

Owl Club could’ve done a cool thing where they just sat on the episode and then the day and time of the premiere posted it on the site so that people who don’t want to deal with the stream/can’t get the stream to work can watch it via the upload instead since fate had dropped into their laps early

BUT NAH

they just want those clicks and shit and now half the fandom has dipped and/or gone quiet cause they’re staying offline so they don’t see spoilers and the other half is sharing/posting spoilers (ESPECIALLY on youtube, again, cause they also want those clicks)

CAUSE NOTHING IS BETTER RIGHT BEFORE A BIG PREMIERE THAN THE FANDOM GOING SILENT/MUTED FOR FEAR OF SPOILERS!!! :D

just absolutely murder that big series finale hype, no one was excited or looking forward to this in anyway, it’s fiiiiiiine

#TOH #the owl house #/talking about the leaks but not about the episode itself #ruby talks #ruby speaks #ruby rambles #BRUH I am so bad #on god I swear owltwt went damn near silent/non-existent the moment word got around about the leaks #ALSO THEY ARE TESTING MY SELF CONTROL HERE #I'm plan to hold out but if the leaks get too bad I'm gonna have to break and watch it #cause there is only so much I can let get spoiled for me before the wait is no longer worth it #tumblr hasn't been bad thus far #and like I said owltwt more or less went dead the moment word go out #BUT YOUTUBE #youtube is like--- they're trying my dudes #they are trying so hard #also I've been reporting every video I see so like #hope those clicks are worth getting reported #don't fucking spread leaks :)

[fuckin-sick-bih]

if you and your partner/SO have never just done trope-y cliché shit for funsies... DO IT. i absolutely highly recommend being cliché as FUCK

#just bex talkin #hold them close and lend them your letterman jacket bc god damn they'll look cute as FUCK #and then you even have the chance to do that cute little “well i don't want you getting sick” line #i mean... my god y'all find yourself a caretaker partner if you're ALSO one bc it's... wow #like holy shit i've never been treated this good by someone and it's like... actively wrapping my crispy little dead heart in aloe #god forbid he gets sick again i'm gonna end up begging to bring him a little care package #just... just let me kiss your forehead and keep you warm... plz....

[wander-over-the-words]

What if I wrote an alternate ending for The Saint and the Sinner where Sam was a moment too late and Johnny shot Tommy dead

What then

#wandering over the words #GUESS WHAT I'VE BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST TWO HOURS :D #damn kid did you just kill that guy in front of his mobster boyfriend. shit you done fucked up now. #the cops are comin Sam. stop cradling Tom's dead body you're gonna hafta leave him behind. Sam. hey Sam. Sam.

[helleboretks]

I'VE BEEN DEAD FOR A WHILE, SORRY-

Man, y'all, I ain't even gonna lie cause I dunno HOW I neglected posting on here so long, goddamn-

Imma have to get to this eventually, cause my artstyle's improved, and I'm hyperfixating on a new fandom, and I wanna draw that, maybe even possibly redesign Fisseha a little to better fit how I draw, aaaaaaand get back to fmab shenans-

Eventually, it'll happen uwu

#hb'scrazy #damn i've been dead for a while #that was unintentional as fuck XD #Just remember kids! #If I don't do shit for a couple of months on here just assume I completely forgot to do anything- #I've also been focusing more on building a following for my other socials with my main #so that's also a major factor to me being gone WHEEZE #I WILL RETURN EVENTUALLY THO #I PROMISE YOU THAT-

[lucian-evander]

I never thought i'd say that but i think i'm starting to loose my faith (very positive) ?!

#🎶 that's me in the corner loosing my religion 🎶 #like until now i questioned catholicisme and disagreed with it but in a i think god is wrong way but with an unbreakable faith in him #like in a i accept to be damned then way #but i've been leaning toward satanism these last months and like satan didn't appear in my fucking room #and god didn't shot me dead everytime i blasphem #idk #but that's good new #maybe one day i'll be able to go in a church and not care or believe at all #ex catholic #religious trauma #tw satanism mention #i'm way too oversharing on the internet today whoops #personal stuff #my stuff

[monty-glasses-roxy]

The Ruined pizzaplex is steeped in death and disrepair, it’s almost to the point that when the others are finally Meteor-ed, they don’t even know if they’ll survive escaping the damn place. None of them know, it’s a death trap. I don’t even think some of them expected to live for long after they escaped

But then they do, and they’re in a completely unfamiliar world that’s saturated with life and it’s unlike anything they’ve ever been exposed to before. Fazent always carried that touch of death, yknow? They never knew any different.

But then they claw their way into the light and someone is wrapping a blanket around their shoulders and giving them a bottle of water and asking if they’re ok because they must’ve just been Changed, they look so disoriented, and they don’t know what to do.

But they have each other, they’re *alive* again. The scars will never go away, but they have each other, and they desperately hope that’s enough.

YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE-

Fsdfsdf nah though you're on the right lines with this... may I offer...

The Plex is dead. It's stagnant, forever unchanging and is left to rot like all the other bodies under the floorboards. Those that remain are rotting and hurt, discarded like broken and unwanted toys and abandoned in the ruins of what is the only world, the only home they've ever known.

... But it's not dead.

How can it be? They're still there. They're still alive.

And like a phoenix rising from the ashes, they'll realise that for themselves and start laying the kindle for their fire.

#GFDSDFS #didn't know whether to leave it at a funny joke or try and like. give you something here #what I'm saying here is that my brain is making complicated metaphors for a story it hasn't actually finished cooking yet lmao #i dunno the concept of life and death is probably gonna be pretty crucial here #it's just different to them and it always has been so what makes something dead or alive is... #well I can already think of like. at least four examples off the top of my head where this would be relevant #nah the intricacies and the layers of what I want are all here for the most part so I just gotta like. weave the rest of the story together #with it's characters and their choices and the lives they are leading #I'm spinning in circles on meanings and shit cause my brain is buzzing like a hive of bees over the fucking #LAYERS of a HUGE plot thing that will be part of the major resolution at the end #it's like a god damn wedding cake or I dunno #onions?? #maybe onions given if I do it right it WILL cause some tears lmao #nah though we'll see how this plays out #I'm most likely overcomplicating and at some point I'll just grab the threads and pull the stupid brain knots out for this lmao #but nah what I'm going for IS complicated cause I've never tried an approach like this before so like #it's keeping my brain chugging for realsies #meteors au #pop rox answers

[neo-shitty]

halazia 🐈‍⬛

#kpop reactions for once bc i've been talking whc1 nonstop these past few days HAHA #why are halateez dead/scarecrows now HELP #i thought they were gonna pull a mama by exo #halazia sounds like a hymn of prayer?? what does halazia even mean #who are they and what happened to halateez!!! #oh god i love the dystopian setting so much </3 #NO FIX ON INDEED??? HELLO IS THIS A NEW LEAF OR WHAT WHO ARE THEY #THE BURNING OF THE ICONIC BLACK HAT HELLO??? i hope someone can figure out ateez' lore someday god damn #why are they bringing the marble down for... #'no more keep control' #'no more keep your soul' hello????? who did you sell your soul to??? #also wooyoung dancebreak OH #FOUR REFLECTIONS???? WHAT??? WHO??? WHO ARE WATCHING??? #damn thats fucking weird but holy shit #toff.txt #unwarranted opinions

[running-in-the-dark]

just realised something random: I've always been kinda sad that there isn't any media that my parents liked and shared with me, that sort of thing. I know of things that they like, of course, but it was never something they showed me or anything.

and I just realised that's because it was never something nice, something fun, something they wanted to share - no, they only ever brought up things that they liked as a way to say that everything I liked was bad.

#like.... my dad loved musicals. but he only ever mentioned them when he was telling me how bad everything I like (and basically all modern #music really) is. #my mother likes whatever songs are played on the one radio station she likes #literally that's her taste in music. always has been. #but still everything I've ever liked is just awful. #especially movies and shows. I'd try to show her things I was watching when I was younger. I'd record episodes on VHS specifically to show #her when I'd visit her next. #and she never said a single nice thing about any of it #and then I *had to* watch movies that she liked with her because she'd say she was tired of watching all this stuff. #so it was never a good thing. #idk I just feel like that really sucks. first of all it's just mean as fuck. but also like. I'll never get to listen to a song and think 'aw #my dad loved that song!'. it's only ever 'he hated this one. said this one was terrible. hated this singer's voice.' etc #and my mother's shitty comments have ruined things that I used to love (can't watch corpse bride anymore because it was my favourite when I #was like 15 and I begged her to watch it with me and to this day she brings that up as an example of what a great mother she is - 'I watched #that HORRIBLE movie about the dead people with you and didn't complain about it once' #bitch you complained the whole damn time and you have been complaining about it for 17 YEARS NOW. #ugh shitty people shouldn't have children.