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pineforphantompain · 3 years

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Things I would like for the end of Start Up:

(These are Not predictions, this is my fantasy ending before I’m sorely disappointed by the real last episodes.) Fair warning: of course I would ship the female lead with the second male lead, and that is included here. There is no NDS hate, however my dream ending is them not together, but still friends. Given the state of things, I wouldn’t want to upset anyone with my ship.

Under the cut because it got too long.

- A time skip, but not immediate. I want to see DalMi working on her career, and starting to rebuild her relationship with her sister. And NDS growing on his own too. I want this over the course of years, so I would envision fast-forwarding/skipping some of this development. (I’ve been thinking about this since before the most recent episode, so before I knew there would be a time skip, and although often contrived and poorly executed, I think it fits here, so long as it’s not at the expense of Dal Mi / In Jae interaction and development to skip to the leads reuniting. I’m worried that’s what it will be, but hoping not!)

- Won In Jae. She was an important character, but she’s been so neglected. Some time and care spent on furthering her story, please and thank you.

- IJ and her grandmother maybe, like where is that!???

- Main couple broken up, but not completely out of contact, like distantly friendly. I would have preferred a nicer parting than we were given, but I did want them to break up and for him to leave so.. (Not just because I don’t ship, but for that whole independent development thing). Also all five of Samsan Tech remaining in touch to some extent.

- Yong San gets a dog maybe? (They gave him a poorly executed mess of a revenge plot, that boy deserves a puppy. Also I want to see another dog).

- Han Ji Pyeong writes a final letter (but also the first one under his own name!) and leaves it in the birdhouse. Nothing explicitly romantic, but some honest apologies and thanks, admission of what the letters meant to him and appreciation for her, wishing her well, that sort of stuff. Dal Mi eventually reads this, but not right away, let it sit there for awhile. I’m thinking maybe she and IJ go to revisit childhood memories and stuff, so she’s in the area and feels compelled to look in the birdhouse. (This is only a small part that does not cut into the sister content.) We see her reading it in a later scene, this is probably when we see/hear what was written too, at the same time as she reads it, not when he’s writing it.

- More on the point about furthering Dal Mi’s story removed from romance, this applies to putting distance between my ship as well (I’m only a hypocrite sometimes). I’m thinking something like a pleasant loose parting, where it’s stated that although he’s no longer Samsan’s Tech’s mentor (and therefore they have no reason to be in frequent contact), he’ll be there if she needs (say if she has like 461 questions to ask in the middle of the night). Not significantly involved in each other’s lives, but on good terms.

- Maybe they see each other around at work occasionally. (I’m not sure of the layout of Sandbox and SH Venture Capital, but I think this is reasonably likely if she’s at InJae Company while they’re at Sandbox?) There’s some suggestion that she’s especially happy to see him, but still no romantic development yet (we have family relationships and career progress to focus on still!).

- Whether at InJae Co or elsewhere, DalMi is doing well professionally, and we’re all very proud of her, but she isn’t CEO of her own company again (yet?).

- We’ve skipped through to about the end of the three years and we’re at an event, not unlike the networking party from earlier. This time, our girl is much more comfortable and confident; she networks and also pleasantly chats with her sister.

- There, Dal Mi and Ji Pyeong’s eyes meet across the room, she walks forward first, and they approach each other. A rather long conversation follows, starting with small talk and discussing business. Eventually she remarks on how this night reminds her of when she first met DS (hmm. how might things have been different if he hadn’t shown up). Maybe this is where we get her asking why he chose to help make DS someone he was not, rather than just admit to using someone else’s name 15 years ago, and then continued with the lie?? He tells her he didn’t want her to be disappointed. Whether a look, or a direct statement that she doesn’t think she’d have been too disappointed, that’s the general idea conveyed. Then the conversation moves on from there (whether we hear more of it or not). Ultimately, he drives her home, himself, not letting someone he barely knows use his car to drive her. (Yes, he opens the door for her just like last time).

- The drive home is nice. Maybe she thinks about DS that night years ago, maybe she asks about how he knew about the music box, and Ji Pyeong answers that he showed the letters to DS, oh, so he saved them? (I want her to know that). He drops her off, walks her to the entrance (it’s too late to visit Grandma)

- She suggests they get lunch or something sometime, pine nut kalguksu from Gapyeong perhaps?

- They do, and from here rekindle their friendship, and eventually begin dating. I’m not too particular about how much of this is shown on screen.

- Within that I do want her announcing that she’s decided to be nosy again/ one or both of them admitted to missing the other doing so.

- This could lead to her reiterating how she’d like to do something for his birthday, like she said but never did a few years ago. However, he can point out that she really did without knowing it. Maybe she asks if it was really his wish to play go-stop, and why. Brief explanation that he has no family, and how he met her grandmother (because seriously how has this not come up yet).

- She confesses first this time around. They officially start dating and it’s really cute. Grandma Choi approves obviously.

- Moving on from that, Samsan Tech boys return! (A visit, permanently?)

- (We spend some time with DS with his parents first.)

- Then, they gather together with the girls, and it’s a lovely reunion. Despite having kept in touch, they still need to share all the updates. Everyone is doing well even if it isn’t exactly what they dreamed. Yong San shares pictures of his dog. I maybe like the idea of DS having a new girlfriend, whether we see this relationship or just hear her mentioned, works for me. He maybe admits that he feels weird about his ex-girlfriend’s new relationship, but isn’t mad, because I think that they should be friends and happy in their respective relationships.

- There is at least one meow sound effect, probably more, because those are important.

- As this reunion wears on they get to talking about the future, leading to something not unlike the scene of them all in the old office excitedly working on new ideas. Maybe In Jae even gets to join in this time?

- This is how the drama ends. Not a strict conclusion, but a directed open ending? The main characters are all doing well, but that doesn’t mean this is where they are permanently. They have more experience and wisdom to move forward to a future still filled with dreams and possibilities. (Definitive happy endings aren’t usually my thing, so maybe that’s why, but I really think a less certain, yet hopeful ending suits Start Up really well?)

#yikes this got out of hand but I’m putting it out there now #start up thoughts #tvn start up #start up #Good Boy tm #(pls filter/blacklist that tag to avoid any and all hjp related content from me from now on)#second lead syndrome #kdrama #asian dramas #tv #koreaboo #스타트업 #my thoughts #ignore me

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hazza-bear-care · 5 years

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Babie Crue (5/?)

Description: After everything that happened with Roxy, Cam attempts to freeze Tommy out of her life. Nikki tries to explain how bad of an idea that is, but Cam won’t listen. In an attempt to make Cam and Tommy open up to each other, the rest of the band lock them in a closet Seven Minutes in Heaven style.

~~~~~~~

The bus pulled over at a gas station. As the driver got up to exit, so did Roxy. She attempted to buy some sort of sympathy by grabbing her stuff as slowly as she could while looking over her shoulders with a pitiful excuse for puppy-dog eyes. No one would look at her. Nikki’s attention was held by Grace, who babbled happily as the bassist bounced her on his knees. Vince was still in the back of the bus comforting Cam, Mick was suddenly occupied in the nothingness going on outside, and Tommy was glaring at Roxy as she moved gingerly. When she finally gathered the minimal stuff she had: a simple weekender bag overflowing with skanky clothes, no underwear, enough lipstick to choke a medium sized dog, and her purse, Roxy turned one last time to look over her shoulder. This time, Mick was looking directly at her. Roxy couldn’t help but feel slightly hopeful about what was possibly going to come out of the guitarist’s mouth, but her hope was quickly shattered as Mick raised his hand, his middle finger sticking straight up.

“See ya later!” Mick exclaimed, a slight smile on his face. Nikki couldn’t help but let out a slight chuckle as Roxy slammed the door closed behind her. Shortly after Tommy’s latest fling left, Vince emerged from the back of the bus.

“Is she still mad?” Nikki asked as the singer scooped Grace out of his lap and sat next to Mick

“Oh she’s furious but I talked her into taking a nap with the promise that we’d look after Gracie. She also made me promise not to use her as chick bait, at least for tonight.” Everyone except Tommy laughed. The drummer’s mind was still reeling from the slap that Cam shot across his face and for the life of him, he couldn’t understand what had hurt Cam so much. Tommy had never laid a hand on a woman, and he never would again. He knew he couldn’t blame it on the half pound of coke he had snorted, and he couldn’t blame it on Roxy (even though the bitch got what she deserved).

“Tommy!” Vince yelled, snapping the drummer out of his thoughts. “Did you hear what I said man?”

“No, man. Didn’t catch it, sorry.” Tommy muttered, turning his attention back to the world blurring past his window.

“I asked you how your shoulder and face were. Need to go to the hospital or something?” Vince repeated, slight worry etched onto his face. Tommy knew Vince was just as fucked up as the rest of them were, yet when the situation called for it, he could sober up faster than either of them.

“I’m fine, Vinnie. Just peachy.” Tommy spat back to the singer. In fact, he wasn’t okay: he just got stabbed in the fucking shoulder and slapped within the last half hour. His shoulder was killing and his mind was racing a million miles a minute in a futile attempt to figure out his next plan of action. Deciding to pass the time the best way he knew, Tommy closed his eyes to try to get a few hours of peace.

~~~~~~~

“Hey, Vinnie. Wow you got her to sleep?! You’re pretty good with a baby.” Cam remarked as she walked into the common area, gawking at Vince’s superpower.

“Better than Nikki?” Vince asked, a cheeky smile spreading across his face as Nikki threw a crumpled piece of paper towards the singer.

“Mmm, not quite, but definitely better than Ozzy.” Cam smiled, taking a seat next to Nikki.

“You good?” The bassist asked, trying his best to keep a sleeping Tommy out of the conversation.

“No, but I will be. Thanks, Sixx. How is he?” Cam asked, nodding her head in the direction of Tommy.

“Not much better. Keeps zoning out. Passed out not too long ago, actually.” Mick explained, strumming some chords onto his leather pants.

“Do you think, when you forgive him of course, you’ll ever tell him how you feel?” Nikki questioned.

“W-what do you mean, Nikki?” Cam stuttered.

“Come on! Everyone can see that you’re in love with him!”

“Everyone except Tommy, apparently.” What they were saying was true: Cam was head over heels for her drummer best friend. When she wasn’t on the bus, she opted to sleep in Tommy’s old Pink Floyd shirt, his scent extracted from it long ago. She was eternally grateful for everything he and his family had done for her and Grace over the past months, but after today, Cam wasn’t going to risk falling in love again.

“I don’t think I’ll ever forgive him, guys. Today was pretty intense, especially for Roxy. Vince, you saw my freak out; do you think I should forgive him?” Cam questioned, hoping the singer would back her on this.

“I think you should. We both have known the guy since high school, and if I remember correctly, you’ve forgiven him for a lot worse than something like this.” Cam rolled her eyes.

“Even with a single beer in your systems, you’ve all stopped thinking rationally. I mean coke is a hell of a drug, but at least you guys would see both sides of the story before jumping to conclusions! Gimme my kid, Vince.” Cam ordered angrily, standing from her seat.

“No, Cam. Grace is fine where she is! Sit down and let’s talk about this, okay?” Mick ordered causing everyone to jump. Cam slowly sat back down and stared at her hands. Mick rarely yelled at anyone, let alone when Grace was around.

“He deserves to know Cam. It’s your responsibility, but if you don’t tell him, we will.” Cam nodded as everyone tried to explain.

“I deserve to know what?” Tommy’s sleepy voice rasped from behind everyone, Cam jumping at the sound of it.

“Nothing, Tommy. You don’t deserve to know anything.” Cam spat, removing herself from the stressful situation. She didn’t want to be anywhere near Tommy, but the small confines of the bus physically made that dream impossible. Cam settled on the floor, her back against the door as her fingers went through her hair in frustration.

“What the fuck was that about?” Tommy asked after Cam had once again isolated herself from the band.

“Nothing. Just give her some time and she should come around soon.” Mick explained gruffly while taking a swig of his vodka. Stupidly, Tommy decided to trust that answer.

~~~~~~~

When the bus finally stopped, Tommy was the first person off. Nikki and Vince followed, leaving Mick to help Cam gather Grace’s toys and books that barely occupied the baby on long road trips.

“I agree with Vince, ya know. I strongly believe you should talk to Tommy. Not about your feelings, but about what happened between him and Roxy. He needs a friend to be there for him.” Mick offered as he bounced Grace in his arms, watching as Cam packed everything into a spare backpack. She couldn't help but roll her eyes, already tired of everyone’s advice.

“Mick, you don’t understand! I’ve trusted and will continue to trust Tommy with not just my life, but Gracie’s as well. But somewhere I have to draw the line. He fucking punched her, Mick! You were there! And you’re still choosing to defend him! Gimme my kid and leave me alone for the rest of the night. All of you!” Mick quickly but gently handed Grace off to her mother and the pair stomped off the bus. Cam attempted to avoid the roadies who were unpacking suitcases and throwing them towards a luggage cart, but she knew that if she waited for her luggage, she’ d have to talk to Doc. She really didn’t want to do that tonight.

“Randy, could you hand me my suitcase? I don’t really want to associate with anyone in or responsible for Motley Crue more than I have to.” Cam explained.

“Sure thing, sweets. What happened?” Randy asked, digging around the bottom of the bus for the only pink suitcase amongst a sea of black.

“I don’t want to talk about it, right now. I’ll tell you some other time, okay?” Randy simply nodded and handed over the suitcase. Cam shot him a grateful smile as she adjusted Grace on her hip and hoisted the suitcase into her hands. She made her way to the hotel and almost instantly bumped into Doc.

“I heard what happened. Here’s your key.” Doc handed Cam the key to her room and escorted her to the elevator.

“Am I on the same floor as them?” Cam asked sadly as they waited for the elevator to reach the lobby.

“Only because it was already paid for, Cam. If this fight had happened before we had situated anything, you better believe you and Grace would be on a different floor.” Doc explained. Cam nodded as a farewell and stepped into the elevator, tears welled in her eyes. She didn’t want to be mad, especially at her best friends, but they were getting into something they couldn’t begin to wrap their minds around.

~~~~~~~

As Cam got ready for the show, mostly because her job revolved around it, she mentally prepared for the showdown that awaited her. Grace sat in front of her mom on the bathroom counter, a makeup brush in her chubby hands. Cam smiled as she continued to get ready, a single hand resting on Grace’s stomach to ensure her safety. A loud knock on her door caused both mother and daughter to jump, the sound unexpected. Cam hoisted Grace to her hip and went to answer the door, only to be met with Nikki and Vince.

“Nikki? Vince? Why aren’t you at the venue? Soundcheck should be starting soon.” Cam questioned. In the blink of an eye, Grace was snatched out of Cam’s arms as the mother was thrown over Nikki’s shoulder. Cam screamed and threshed in Nikki’s grasp, but the bassist wouldn’t budge. They stopped at a janitor’s closet and shoved the young mother into the cramped area, locking the door before she could escape.

“This isn’t fucking funny, guys! Let me out!” Cam whined through the door.

“No! Everyone told you not to avoid Tommy, but you did it anyway. Now you both don’t leave until some apologizing’s been done!”

“Both?” Cam questioned softly, turning to meet Tommy, the drummer slumped against some shelves.

“They got you too, huh?” Tommy asked, silently chuckling. Cam nodded and looked at her shoes, which unfortunately were her fuzzy bunny slippers.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to freeze you out and avoid you. You’re just so infuriating sometimes; and when you slapped Roxy, I thought you were going to come after me next. I just got away from that life, Tommy. I don't want to go through that again.” As Cam spoke, tears fell from her eyes. She slid down the door and sobbed into her hands. Tommy’s heart shattered.

“No, baby. I’m the one who should be sorry. I wanted to save you; I promised I would. The way you looked at me after you dealt with Roxy, I thought you’d never talk to me again, let alone look at me. I thought you and Gracie would be on the next plane back to LA to live with my parents again. I don’t want to lose you...either of you.” Tommy pulled Cam into his lap as she cried harder at his words. She had felt so worthless during her time with Dev, and hearing all the words Tommy was saying made her feel like the queen she deserved to be.

“I love you, Cam.” Tommy kissed her hairline as Cam gripped him tighter.

“I love you too, Tommy.” He adjusted her face to where he could see it and he swiped his thumbs under Cam’s eyes, wiping away her tears and runny mascara. Her eyes fluttered closed at Tommy’s touch, which made the drummer’s next action easier.

He closed the space between them with a kiss. While not very hard or urgent, Tommy poured all of his emotions into it, his hands gripping Cam’s face gently. Cam kissed back, heart pounding against her chest. When they pulled away, they both stared into each other’s eyes and smiled, Tommy’s thumbs rubbing Cam’s cheeks gently.

“Am I forgiven?” Tommy asked softly. Cam smiled and nodded, quickly kissing her drummer again.

“Abso-fucking-lutely, Tommy. Come on, you have a show to get to.” Cam replied, quickly standing from her place on Tommy’s lap. Hand in hand, the pair made their was out of the closet and smiled when Nikki and Vince cheered, and Grace clapped her hands with a huge smile on her face.

~~~~~~~

A/N: Hope you enjoyed! Let me know what you thought of this! Love ya!

Tags: @kellysimagines

#motherhood #motley crue imagine #motley crue series #tommy lee imagine #tommy lee x oc #Vince Neil #Mick Mars #The Dirt #nikki sixx x oc

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darlingnik · 5 years

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Survive, Thrive, or Both?

For years every person that have has gotten the chance to know me, almost always suggests that I should write. Writing is hard for me. It’s physically hard because I have the worst handwriting in the world and literally can never stay focus on the task of writing my thoughts. Writing requires the writer to be vulnerable. Being vulnerable; actually acknowledging vulnerability is something I have never been comfortable doing. But because this is my 40th birthday and because (as usual) I procrastinated (no fabulous photo shoots, parties, dinners, vacations or any of the stunting for the gram events have been planned), I am gifting myself this action. Actually, I am tasking myself with this project. I realized recently that my 30′s are ending along with the decade. 2020 is upon us whether we are ready or not. I am not prepared for this next chapter, though it is happening regardless. Lack of preparedness has never stopped time.

Most of my life I held on to things well passed their expiration dates. I am a secret but, overt hoarder. Not like the kind you see on television, I am a hoarder of memories, people and trauma. Some of my favorite items to hoard in particular is names. As I boldly step into my new chapter, a new season and a new decade, it is imperative that I shed anything that no longer serves me, this includes identities. Why should I continue to pine for the names of the men who have either hindered, harmed or hurt me; to forgo the name of the one who helped, loved, elevated and celebrated me...This new path requires a new name steeped in love, sacrifice, joy, strength, and honor. It is the amalgamation of the asé, love, hope and sacrifices of my mother that I am able to take on this work.

But what is this work? One of my gifts is critical thinking. I am critical of everything from the flick of the wrist of the barista at Starbucks to counting the number of clicks required to make an online purchase. With the aforementioned question in mind, I began the task of deep self-reflection because that is the only area where I seemed to have difficulty assessing things accurately. I realized that though I am the eldest of my mother’s and father’s children, a natural leader in all realms of my personal and professional life, I am in fact, a person who is in the between of things: generations, zodiac signs, and now life. I loathe the in between the same way I despise “the gray area.” The dreaded, feared 40 is now upon me and I am not as prepared as I thought I would be.

Depending on whom you ask, I could be considered a millennial vs generation X. I am on the end of generation X ushering in the millennials. My birthday is at the end of one zodiac sign (Libra) and the beginning of the next (Scorpio), thus making me a cusper of sorts. My birthday is after my mother’s and before my father’s, which now makes for an interesting four week period every year. Despite being hamstrung between so many things mentioned and not, I never realized until now, how uncomfortable the middle is. I am now at the top of the hill and the view at the top is not anything close to what was expected. I feel my mortality more now than ever. I feel my mother’s mortality even more. Death, loss and change are the hurdles I must contend with, regularly. No longer can I feign ignorance, avoid responsibility, or be conveniently confused as to who I am or what I want. 40 is supposed to be the arrival of self-confidence and self-esteem and simply not giving a damn. I am unsure of myself more than ever before. The season for rose colored glasses is over and never to return.

As I approach 40 I'm overwhelmed with the idea of what life looks like for the latter half. I somehow missed all of the memos about the changing of the new decade and honestly as a millennial vs. gen X, one would think that I would be on top of 2020’s arrival. However this period of time has caused me to do some deep reflection.

Society has taught women to dread 40 and I am no different than any other woman in society. I look at the milestone markers of things that I should have achieved by now and honestly I am lamenting over the fact that most of them I have not achieved and most likely will not achieve (marriage for a 2nd time, children, home ownership, paid off student loans, etc). It amazes me that while I hoard identities, names, and critiques; I never realized my long love affair with trauma. I secretly get a rush being in the pressure cooker. Need to write a paper? Let’s wait 1 hour before it’s due to get it done. Need to study for an exam, let’s cram! Want to move across country? Pack up and leave with barely enough to get there safely. Need to write your blog/think piece/online journal entry? Do it the day before your birthday. I am a quintessential procrastinator. If there is a way to add pressure to situation, I am all in. But why crave such high octane experiences? The only conclusion I can come to is my love/hate relationship with trauma. Growing up in a home where abuse abounded, I learned early the importance of survival. If my mother taught me anything, she taught me how to get knocked down and stand back up, quickly. I watched in amazement how she took the hard knocks of life and come back fighting harder. I promised myself that I would never be vulnerable enough to allow a man or anyone the chance to take me off my square. Physical abuse, never. Mental, emotional, spiritual abuse, bring it on!

My survival skills required intense situations and while I wasn’t going to allow any man to hit me, I for damn sure would let you string me along, take me on the long wild ass ride of an emotional roller coaster for the thrill of “surviving” it. I routinely seek out personal and professional spaces that push me past my boundaries and comfort. Thus a queen of creating thunderstorms only to cry profusely when it rains is born. The quintessential procrastinator is actually a professional victim. But at 40 the theatrics of yesteryear are contrite and exhausting. I can no longer tolerate high pressure situations just for the thrill. If pressure can create diamonds or burst pipes, then consider me human confetti.

Survive, thrive or both? I have proven that I can survive but now I choose to thrive, even if it means taking a loss, falling from grace, or not achieving the milestone markers. It means regardless, if I professionally am a success, lose the weight, win the lottery or meet and fall in love with Travis Cure (@Travis.Cure on Instagram), I am enough. Thriving in life at 40 means saying no more, creating pockets of joy daily, not comparing myself to others, allowing myself to be vulnerable, allowing myself to feel even when the feeling hurts and last but not least letting go of all the people, places and things that do not elevate or celebrate me. Life is like a basketball game. We all get four quarters and 40 is my halftime. Will I walk into the locker room elated or defeated? Will I leave the locker room inspired or tired? Will I continue to make the same bad plays over and over or will I play smarter? Will I take chances or continue to play it tight and safe? Will I trust my coach (my higher self) and my team (the friends and family that love and support me)? It is not important to assess the potential to win the game of life. It is important that I live my life all of my life not just the highlight reels. I will always be a survivor, but as Dr. Thema (@DrThema on Instagram and Twitter) so aptly tweeted “You’ve mastered survival mode. Now it’s time to live.” No better time to start living than at 40. Now I am off to have my cake and eat it too…but first I must bake it. :)

Nik M.

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