"What I'm trying to say is
By not accepting who I am and what I want
By crushing and condensing my identity til it explodes all over everybody's everything
I hurt people
And then I kept doing it
Again and again
Until I learned that raging against the parts of me I find hard to love
Doesn't actually erase them
It doesn't actually fix anything
It just makes me ill
And unfulfilled
And you know what's truly terrible?
Is that some people go their whole lives thinking that's an okay way to feel
They wake up every morning and voluntarily erase themselves
Dream by dream, wish by wish
Until they're barely even fucking people anymore
They're just piles of bone and hair and flesh
Red meat going bad
And I dunno
Maybe it's just me, man
But that sounds far worse than any awkward, honest conversation
I have ever had"
- STOPPING A GARDEN HOSE WITH YOUR THUMB by The Narcissist Cookbook
DEATH DOESN'T DISCRIMINATE BETWEEN THE SINNERS AND THE SAINTS IT TAKES AND IT TAKES AND IT TAKES AND WE KEEP LIVING ANYWAYS WE RISE AND WE FALL AND WE BREAK AND WE MAKE OUR MISTAKES AND IF THERE'S A REASON I'M STILL ALIVE WHEN EVERYONE WHO LOVES ME HAS DIED I'M WILLING TO WAIT FOR IT (WAIT FOR IT) I'M WILLING TO WAIT FOR IT (WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT) I AM THE ONE THING IN LIFE I CAN CONTROL (WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT) I AM INIMITABLE I AM AN ORIGINAL I'M NOT FALLING BEHIND OR RUNNING LATE (WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT) IM NOT STANDING STILL I AM LYING IN WAIT (WAIT WAIT WAIT)