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astaroth1357 · 3 years

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Demigod MC Series: Dionysus

Hey y’all, sorry for going dark! I’m alright, almost completely recovered in fact! I just got so sleepy while my body was fighting stuff off and couldn’t really work up the energy to write... Still going to be spotty for a short time, but I’m glad to have gotten this done. See ya soon!

Demigod MC Series: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus

Lucifer

Well, this mortal stumbled out of the portal covered in glitter, body paint, and carrying a red solo cup… which they proceeded to stare at like, "'ell sshhit… Thiz iz sum stron s'uff…"

First impressions were not on their side here.

He spent a depressingly long amount of time more or less assuming that the MC was a drunken f-up and spent the first few months trying to make them more… presentable.

But like… How do you stop someone from acting like a drunk fool when they can turn any drink they touch alcoholic???

For months they would show up to meetings buzzed or stumbling, all smiles and all giggles but HORRIBLY unprofessional, and he just couldn't stand it!

But then he found out their little secret…

Assassination threats befall the exchange students all the time. Most of them are dealt with quickly but some (through skill or dumb luck) manage to slip through...

He had been walking with the MC through their new vineyard in the House's courtyard, yet again trying to lecture them about their drunken behavior, when suddenly the two were ambushed!

Ten or so heavily armored demons dropped down from the sky to attack them! Lucifer was so preoccupied that he got cornered by three of them and it took him a hot minute to destroy them.

When he looked back at the mortal (who had been fighting a 1-on-7) he was certain they'd have been kidnapped or worse…

But he saw that they had already cut down two attackers with their weapon with ease. The other five were rolling in the dirt, babbling about inexplicable terrors and imaginary pain as their minds succumbed to madness…

Meanwhile, the MC just stood in the middle of it all with the icy glare of someone who’s just revealed how stone-cold sober they've always been under the surface...

When they turned back to him, they put their usual ditzy smile back on over the tormented wails of the demons around them...

MC: Whoopsie… Gotta little mad there. 🙂

He uh… took a big ol'step off their back after that. Surprisingly, they're more pleasant (and less dangerous) "drunk" than they are sober…

Mammon

Oh HELL yeah!! Lucifer actually gave him a mortal that knows how to party!!

Admittedly, they looked like utter trash when they first met, like, "Hey, I've been at this party since DAWN" trash, but they gave him one good look and pulled together a surprisingly hot smile.

MC: "-ey yer cute… Ya like strip poker?"

Spoken like someone else who also makes shit decisions… They were going to get along just fine!

And they did. The MC to him was that one friend that's always down for anything. Just anything. Whenever. Wherever.

He wants to try sneaking into Lucifer's room to steal stuff? Sure, what time?

He wants to take a mattress and see if he can ride it down the grand staircase of the palace? Alright, we bringin' pillows too?

He needs to set up another scheme that's gotta involve live rats and box of tiny hats and monocles?? That's oddly specific but count them in!!

Sometimes he honestly can't tell if they're laid back or just crave chaos... but it works out fine for him either way so who cares? 🤷‍♀️

And if you think normal Mammon is a pain in the ass for Lucifer? Check out drunk Mammon. All the same urges but literally none of the (marginal) competence!!

At one point, the eldest ended up stringing both Mammon and the MC from the ceiling after they both barged into his office looking for Goldie… while he was still in there… watching them wander around aimlessly calling out for a piece of plastic like it was a missing puppy…

They end up together on the ceiling a lot come to think of it, but hey, at least now he has some company. 😌

Leviathan

Thinks they're the most normal normie to have ever normed on this normie planet!!!

No, seriously. They're a billion times worse than Asmo!! All they want to do is go to parties and drink all the time! What kind of use is he to someone like that??

… That being said they ARE pretty fun to be around… And their sake is WAY better than anything he could get off Akuzon!!

They also like karaoke too! So at least he has someone else to go with (even if they get so drunk they can’t remember any lyrics and just belt barely coherent discount Mariah Carey vocals behind him...)

Of course, the real fun between these two is everybody else getting to watch a couple of the Devildom's sloppiest drunks attempt to communicate with each other…

Levi: MMM-*hic*-MCCC…!!! *throws himself at them from across the bar*

MC: What Leviachan??? 😨 Did the chair kick you off?!

Levi: Nooo! *pokes their cheek* I wanna-I wanna tell you sometin'...! *tries pulling them closer*

MC: Whaa? Secrets?? *leans in eagerly*

Levi: Mammon used all ma money on’a pyramid scheme a thou-zand years ago… AND HE STILL WON'T PAY ME BAAA-!!! 😭😭 *starts shaking them violently*

MC: *getting flung around like a limp noodle* Waaaat?! Nooo!!! I'm so sowwy!! 😢

Mammon: *watching it all go down right next to him* 😑 Ya guys need some water… I'm cuttin' ya off, got it?

MC: 😱 Shut yer whore mouth, criminal!! *starts pelting him with pretzel bites*

Levi: 😤 Yah!! *joins in*

Good thing he's a shut-in, because the hangovers he gets after those escapades are unreal…

Satan

A little concerned for their liver, honestly… How much damage have they already done to the poor thing...?

But at the same time, he'll be damned if they don't make some utterly fantastic wine!

Alcokinesis wasn't a power he would have pegged a demigod to have but apparently the great art of making drinks comes from their godly DNA.

When they first met, he was trying to get the MC to act less slovenly but made the mistake of agreeing to a wager: he'd let them dress however they pleased if they could give him the BEST drink he'd ever tasted.

Now, Satan isn't a huge drinker (thank you terrible alcohol tolerance), but he's still a man of fine tastes. Plus, he's sampled Demonus from Diavolo royal stock before. They should not have won…

But on that day, he had to let them go to RAD in a pink blanket toga... 😑 Their wine is just THAT good.

He hates to admit it, but they've gotten him drunk more times than he could probably count too… He's not a huge fan of clubbing with them and the others, but if they bring over a bottle from their vineyard he just can't resist. They're a master of their craft, truly.

And it's a good thing he likes their drinks so much, because if they called him, "Kitty-boy," when he's sober, he may have just become a sour grape himself…

They also may or may not have copious amounts of blackmail material of him either meowing between sentences, sobbing over some fictional character he likes, pole dancing on dares….

Yeah, he's been trying to destroy their phone for months now. If Lucifer were to see ANY of that, he's done for… 😣

He has also been meaning to ask them about other aspects of their abilities, their father is also the God of Madness after all, but anytime he tries to bring it up they shove another glass in his hand and tell him not to kill the mood...

Eh. What's the harm in having another drink, right? 🤷‍♀️

Asmodeus

Honey. He's MET Dionysus. He's been to a Dio-party or two and they're INSANE. He could not be more thrilled by this!!!

He practically scooped them up on the first night that they were in the House and it’s practically been a nonstop rave between these two ever since. They’re like the party twin he never knew he needed!!

He absolutely abuses their ability to turn pretty much any drink they touch into alcohol at clubs. It makes the nights so much easier on the wallet PLUS it makes an excellent little party trick to impress the succubi! Who doesn’t want a free drink? 😏

And can he just say that their drinks are better? Just flat out amazing! If it weren’t so unhealthy he’d consider drinking nothing but their booze and wine for the rest of his days, Satan’s certainly getting close to it.

But little does Satan know, he’s not even getting the GOOD stuff...

There’s the normal wine: grapes picked from the vineyard, hand squeezed, then magically helped through the fermenting process. But their real good stuff? They were given enchanted oak barrels from their father and anything that comes out of those is worth starting a WAR over. 😩

He knows, because he gifted an extra bottle to Diavolo once and Barbs came to him the very next day demanding to know what vineyard had produced it with the look of man willing to annex a small nation...

Asmo had to beg Lucifer to talk to Diavolo after the butler more or less kidnapped the MC back to the Castle… Devil knows even Barbs wouldn’t ever be able to reproduce their wine, so they could have been locked there for eternity!!

Thankfully, he got his party-buddy back and their debauchery continued! (Just now with Barbatos following them around sometimes like he’s trying to gather state secrets... It’s an impossible task but he hasn’t given up yet, bless his black heart.)

Beelzebub

He isn't much bothered by their carefree nature, at least they seem to be having fun with his family which he appreciates. 🙂

To be honest, though, he nearly ate them when they first met because they smell like freshly peeled grapes… and for good reason.

By their third day at the House they had (somehow) planted and cultivated a full on vineyard in the courtyard. Hell, the wall growing to their bedroom balcony was covered in grapevines!! Always ripe and completely healthy in defiance of the lack of sun... Whatever magic they used was strong.

And, of course, their grapes were also delicious! Easily among the best fruits he's ever tasted! Every cluster is ridiculously plump, juicy, and sweet like little droplets of pure Heaven… 🤤

When their fruit first ripened, the MC came out with a basket to collect some only to find Beel had gouged himself on over half of their crop!!!

… which may have been why he got snared up on one of the courtyard walls by pissed off grapevines... Even with all his strength, he couldn't break through them and had to wait for Lucifer to cut him down… 😔

From then on, Beel was pretty much the pesky rabbit to the MC's harvest. They had to set up traps and magical barriers to keep him from their precious grapes…!! Which inevitably meant one of his brothers had to come rescue him from their furious vines at least once a week... 🙄

SOMETIMES, the MC will bring him along to help harvest with them with the deal that he can have an extra basket for however many he helps them pick. But the second he takes a bite he shouldn't, it’s back on the wall!

Out of the vineyard, they're nice enough. But put some grapes between these two and they're mortal enemies… STOP messing with their plants, Beel!! 😤

Belphegor

So… this drunken fool is supposed to get him out of the attic? Never mind, this is never going to work…

He was SEVERELY underwhelmed when the "human" finally made it up the steps. This was who they decided to bring for their exchange program? They seemed like they could barely stand!

Naturally, he figured all the better for him. They probably wouldn't even last that long!

Some poor, incompetent human falling victim to a demon out there? Diavolo's reputation would in tatters and he wouldn't even have to lift a finger! (His favorite way of doing things really 😌).

But… they just kept coming back? Like. Nothing was killing them….! How guarded were they keeping this moron??

Or… maybe it was something else?

Sure, the MC seemed like a drunken idiot but there were times when he'd swear that they were just… too aware to be sloshed…

MC: *suddenly stops smiling at him mid-conversation and looks him in the eye* You tilt your head when you lie. You know that?

How can someone so cheerful ALSO be so unnerving…?

So really, he should have seen their sudden heel-turn after they opened the door coming. There he was, fully intending to take them by surprise and choke them after a hug…

...and they knocked him down, climbed onto his back like a spider monkey, and rode him around like a bucking bull using his horns like handlebars!!

It wouldn’t have been AS humiliating if they didn’t also keep shouting things like "Giddiyap!" And "Yee-haw!!"

It took him a whole month to be sure that any and all footage of that nightmare was erased and he STILL hates the MC quite a bit for it…. But he's too scared to attack them now, so…

The lesson here? It's not a fair fight when one side’s crazy... 😔😒

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me demigods

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liturgyontheweekend · 6 years

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When Harry Became Sally: Chapter 3

This chapter highlights the stories of a selection of detransitioners.

p49–52: INTRO

Anderson introduces the chapter, saying that voices of detransitioners deserve to be heard, and he’s going to present several of their stories. I don’t disagree that these stories should be heard, and I do think it’s sad that some trans activists have sought to silence these stories. I don’t think the media has helped, by trying to pit the two marginalized groups against each other, and I hope that the trans community can come to terms with these stories in a more inclusive way and that non-trans folks like Anderson can see these stories not in opposition to folks that are actually trans.

After reading the chapter, I’m definitely noticing that he’s only highlighting one type of detransition story, which works against his claim that he wants to showcase marginalized voices. He chooses six people, all of whom transitioned and then detransitioned because the transition didn’t feel right and didn’t address their underlying problems. He doesn’t share any stories of people who detransitioned due to social or family pressures, who may or may not still identify as transgender, and he doesn’t share any stories of people who detransitioned and then retransitioned.

And the elephant in the room is that he doesn’t share any stories of people who view their transition as successful and are living well-adjusted lives as transgender individuals. I can’t imagine his readers wouldn’t benefit from hearing those stories as well.

I’ll write very little about each of these.

p52–56: CARI

Experienced dissociative disorder. Transitioned due to gender stereotypes. She’s a lesbian.

I think it’s very clear reading this story that the medical profession fails people at times. She received poor care, and was rushed into transition.

p56–58: MAX

Transitioned due to gender stereotypes. She’s a lesbian.

Anderson did not reach out to her, and her comments when she found out her story was used included: “I’m not OK with it…I was not informed.”

She transitioned because she didn’t understand how she could live as a lesbian woman due to societal structures around her. And Anderson mentions that she’s careful to not discount stories of those who have transitioned and found it to be the answer for them.

p59–62: CRASH

Transitioned due to gender stereotypes and underlying trauma. She’s a lesbian.

Anderson did not reach out to her, and her comments when she found out her story was used included: “enraged to see my story distorted and used…would never have agreed to be included in such a book.”

She transitioned, she says, because she was harassed for being a lesbian and because her mom died by suicide. I feel like this story also highlights the need for better mental health care and perhaps a more cautious, measured approach to transition.

p62–66: TWT

Transitioned due to trauma. Experienced dissociative disorder.

Anderson did not reach out to him, and his comments when he found out his story was used included: “unaware my story was used to promote a political agenda…this happens a lot and it is not my intention.”

Another one which implicates bad doctors. No argument from me that we should have more good doctors and more comprehensive, high-quality health care.

While transitioned, he experienced much anti-trans discrimination.

p67–68: CAREY CALLAHAN

Transitioned due to trauma. Experienced dissociative disorder. Based on my reading elsewhere, I think she’s a lesbian.

Anderson did not reach out to her, and her comments when she found out her story was used included: “upset to be used as a rhetorical device by someone who does not respect me…enough to contact me.”

She questions young transition ages, since she got it wrong in her thirties. Anderson doesn’t share much of her story, but she appears to have been dissociative and hated her body. Her writings now are focused on hearing stories of detransitioners and responding to trans activists who try to shut them down.

p69–72: WALT HEYER

Transitioned due to significant childhood abuse. Experienced dissociative disorder.

Walt appeared on Christopher Cantwell’s podcast recently. Cantwell is a white supremacist who was part of the Unite the Right rally in Charlottesville, and said “we’ll f****** kill these people if we have to.”

I have very little to say to anyone who’s running in these circles. He should have had psychotherapy. He also shouldn't suggest that what was right for him is right for everyone.

p72–76: WRAPUP

The chapter title is “Detransitioners Tell Their Stories” but this is really Anderson telling their stories. He didn’t ask at least four of the six people if he could use their stories, and therefore they weren’t allowed to weigh in on whether his was a fair account. This is, at minimum, irresponsible journalism.

The only point he’s really made is that transitioning isn’t the solution to every problem. He admits that in the first sentence of this section, and then goes on to make an absolute claim, saying “trying to align the body with a transgender identity does not resolve the deep issues…” He needed to add “for these six people,” since there are myriad stories of people for whom it has resolved their deep issues.

On page 73, he again misrepresents the Swedish study which doesn’t say what he wants it to say. This time, it’s tough to say it’s not just a blatant lie. The study found that for those who transitioned post-1989, their rates of mortality, suicide, and crime are in line with the general population. I already talked about this in the Introduction email.

If we know that transgender people overall have a higher suicide rate than the general population, and there’s a Swedish study that Anderson seems to like which says that those who transitioned post-1989 have a rate in line with the general population, the only reasonable conclusion is that transitioning was helpful to these people, not harmful. Why does he keep saying the opposite?

He ends the chapter by quoting most of an open letter from Crash, who detransitioned and is lesbian, to Julia Serano, a transgender activist who she believes has misrepresented and been unfair to detransitioners. This is a heartfelt letter, and I did go read it in its entirety.

At the end of her letter, she openly acknowledges trans people, and also that she is not. She notes of those who eventually detransition: “so many of them are lesbian [and it’s] common for them to question whether they are really female.”

Anderson could start by working for an world in which folks like Crash feel validated and accepted for who they are, with full recognition and human rights, which would keep many lesbians like Crash from wondering whether they are really female and whether transitioning is the solution to their problems.

POSTSCRIPT

Finally, I took a look at the 2015 Transgender Survey, to find out more about detransitioning. 8% of over 27,000 respondents had detransitioned at some point in their lives, but 62% of those were currently living in a gender other than that assigned at birth. So we're in the 3–4% range for permanent detransitioning, since many detransition temporarily for some other societal reason. Only 5% of those who detransitioned did it because it wasn't right for them. 36% detransitioned because of pressure from a parent, 26% because of pressure from other family members, 18% due to pressure from a partner, 31% because of harassment, and 29% because of having trouble getting a job. (Respondents could cite multiple reasons, so the totals are greater than 100%). So a total of 0.4% of respondents to the survey detransitioned because transition wasn't right for them.

https://transequality.org/sites/default/files/docs/usts/USTS-Full-Report-Dec17.pdf

The small number of folks (less than half a percent) who actually detransition because they made a mistake DOES NOT invalidate or lessen the importance of their stories. They should be heard, and transgender folks need to engage with them. We should also do more to ensure that we create a safe world for gender-nonconforming and LGB people such that fewer people like Crash transition for the wrong reasons.

Folks like Anderson also shouldn't appropriate detransitioners' stories to attempt to build a case that nobody should ever transition; clearly there are lots of stories he's not telling from the remaining 99.6%.

FOLLOW-UP

I received a response which I then responded to; I can’t print the response but I’ll print my follow-up:

My overall point was that his selection of people to profile is limited. These weren't transgender people; they were people with psychological issues who tried to solve them in a misguided way and for a time believed themselves to be transgender. You can't select a non-representative sample of people (non-transgender people who transitioned), note their psychological problems, and then post-rationalize your conclusions onto another group of people (actual transgender people). Your comment about whether or not those issues "exist within the larger community" is exactly my point -- Anderson doesn't know because he doesn't bother to ask. Probably because he knows what that would do to his argument. Obviously, then, we disagree about his political purposes. Minor point, also, but nobody ever claims that transitioning will alter chromosomal makeup, so I think we all agree there. Anderson, to this point in the book, has not spoken with a single transgender person! I'll eat my hat if he does anywhere in the book; my guess is he'll continue his current trajectory. If he were truly trying to engage the subject rather than pushing a preconceived position, he'd spend some time with folks in the community he's writing about.

I also don't see any evidence based on what you sent over that R.B. is transgender. Unless you've got data to the contrary, you're pushing the same strawman argument that Anderson is. She may fall into that 80% percent of Zucker's research, people who show some nonconformity in childhood but aren't transgender, and end up settling into a straight or LGB+ identity. People who are straight/gay living lives as straight/gay people do not invalidate people who are transgender, and my issue here is that Anderson doesn't interview or profile any of the large number of actual transgender people who do not regret their transitions.

I know some of them, and can assure you they are nothing like the detransitioners that Anderson highlights.

SUMMARY OF MY POINT: Profiling non-transgender people to make claims about transgender people is a strawman. Detransitioners' stories are important for their own sake, not for the sake of an argument that doesn't make sense and that they don't want to be a part of.

#when harry became sally #lgbt

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hutcho33-blog · 6 years

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The Ten Greatest Kanye West Songs Of All Time

Today is Kanye West’s 40th birthday and rather than get Kanye a cake or a pair of extremely expensive sneakers, we here at Boss Hunting decided to celebrate Kanye in the only way we know how, by assessing the greatness of his music.

Don’t expect any mention of that weird Nike diss track or whatever “I am a God” was. No we’re gonna be focusing on the greatness of Kanye. Of course this is only one list and we can’t possibly do every great track justice, but here’s what we ended up with.

Honourable Mentions: Famous, Waves, Lost in the World, Stronger, FourFive Seconds, N***as in Paris, Heartless, I Love Kanye.

Lost in the World, FourFive Seconds and N***as in Paris all get disqualified from the list on the basis that they can’t be entirely classified as ‘Kanye’ songs. Although his collab with Jay-Z is still very much in his style, all of the songs in the top ten come from places that are very recognisably Kanye. Famous gets a mention not only for being a good track, but also for the impact it made on the pop-culture world.

Waves is also an underrated banger, although some of us would’ve liked the final version to sound like how it was initially pitched by Chance the Rapper. Heartless and Stronger also get a mention due to it’s noritory amongst more casual fans of Kanye. I Love Kanye is the best skit on any of his albums and is on here for one reason. It’s funny. It’s quirky. It’s so Kanye.

This section alone could warrant it’s own tribute, with Kanye producing great songs far beyond a ten count. However, here is a carefully considered and likely highly controversial list of the top 10 Kanye West tracks of all time.

10 – Gold Digger → Late Registration (2005)

Possibly Kanye’s most widely popular song, ‘Gold Digger’ became a permanent fixture in clubs around the world due to its eccentric vibe and fun flavour. One should be careful however to fully discount the quality of the track. Even the first thirty seconds are packed with sounds that defined an era in music.

Jamie Foxx’s voice in this track is iconic, leading to a hard breakdown and the introduction of one of the most famous hooks in all of hip-hop. “I ain’t sayin she a gold digger/ but she ain’t mess’n with no broke n****s” is one of the most recognisable hooks in the modern era of hip hop.

The beat stays consistently upbeat, forcing even the most fridget of listeners to at least tap a foot or bob a head. The song reaches out of the bounds of just the rap game and has the widespread pop appeal that few rap songs were able to have before that time.

While Kanye brings the lyrical heat, there are songs that are significantly more intriguing in manner senses. While this song has gained international popularity and acclaim due to it’s accessible greatness, it fails in some respects to do justice to the type of work Kanye is capable of. For this reason, a ranking in the top ten is more than enough to recognise Kanye’s most famous track.

9 – Love Lockdown → 808s and Heartbreaks (2008)

Ah so we come to the heartbreaking love ballad. A story about the conflict between fame and love. The lyrics of this song are less of a concern here, as nothing blows you away in this regard. No immaculate or majestic stage is set by anything that the vocals say. What makes this song so great is that it relies entirely on the way that the instrumentals work so beautifully together to provoke such deep feelings on the listener’s part.

Rather it’s the slow burn and build that transpires throughout the song. The deep bass drums that belt out from the beginning are so deep it feels like someone is drumming your soul. You can just focus on those drums tapping in your chest. One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four. It’s the consistent beat that dominates the song and helps define it. Slowly Kanye adds layers of instruments on top, slowly, until one is totally submerged in the very simple message of Kanye’s heartbreak.

Then the outro. No spoken word just a deep forest sounds that build the song to it’s final climax before being striped away to that all too familiar beat from the intro.

8 – Jesus Walks → College Dropout (2004)

Young Kanye lays down some bars in this one. The whole song relies almost entirely on two pillars.

The first, the context to religion and christianity. This shows in the overall tone of the track, with the back up vocals all having a distinct church group style. This juxtaposed with the preaching manner in which Kanye is actually rapping creates a sense that you’re engulfed in a sermon on the Mount of Yeezus.

The second is Kanye coming at everybody trying to make a name for himself.

“You know what the Midwest is? Young and restless

Where restless (niggas) might snatch your necklace

And next these (niggas) might jack your Lexus

Somebody tell these (niggas) who Kanye West is.”

It’s worth noting this is off Kanye’s first album. He’s basically introducing himself to the audience that tells them one very clear message. My name is Kanye, I’m from the city of Chicago and I’m a badass.

7 – Black Skinhead→ Yeezus (2013)

Gritty Kanye is a good Kanye.

This is Kanye’s best gritty song. When the career retrospective is written on Kanye West it’ll say many a thing. It’ll recount a polarising relationship with she who shall not be named, a beef with Taylor Swift and most prominently of all it will mention that Kanye pioneered a style that was adopted by rappers like Chance.

However this is the black box for Kanye’s influence on a harder and more experimental form of rap music.

As he mentions in the song about going 500mph and being out of control. It’s a direct fuck you to everyone on the outside. The public, the media, the scrutiny, all of it.

It’s the Kardashian era Kanye mission statement. I’m going to do whatever I want to do, make whatever music I want and do it whenever I want to do it.

6 – Hey Mama → Late Registration (2005)

This is some great early Kanye. Just simple story telling over a cool beat with some fun lyricism. It’s the kind of song you play when you’re just hanging out with your friends on a lazy Sunday afternoon enjoying the sunshine.

There’s not a lot to hate about this song. It’s an upbeat tribute from a wildly successful son to the mother that helped him on his road to stardom. Even hook is loveable.

“(Hey Mama), I wanna scream so loud for you, cause I’m so proud of you

Let me tell you what I’m about to do, (Hey Mama)

I know I act a fool but, I promise you I’m goin back to school

I appreciate what you allowed for me

I just want you to be proud of me (Hey Mama)”

Deep down inside we all wish we could just straight up shout out our awesome mothers in song and actually pull it off. So for being a fun, well constructed and never boring display by a loud and proud mama’s boy, Hey Mama pulls a sweet sixth spot.

5 – Blood On Leaves → Yeezus (2013)

Blood on Leaves is dark, hard and gritty.

The sample of Nina Simone’s ‘Strange Fruit’ over piano keys to intro the song immediately catches attention before Kanye is even able to spit a line. The repetition of the phrase “blood on leaves” is a staple of the track, and if one wants to truly appreciate the depth of this song, they should check out the original song itself.

This is one of Kanye’s more undeniably provocative tracks. From referencing lynchings in the south during the late 1800s to calling out Instagram frauds, Kanye covers a very broad range of sensitive social issues whilst remaining aggressive throughout. The use of the song ‘Strange Fruit’ as a sample holds a lot of weight in this sense politically. It’s not trying to be a party banger, nor is it a song built for the radio. It’s a track that’s meant to make you think about the world. Usually when artists (and Kanye is guilty of this too) try and do this kind of commentary, they can miss the point entirely, seeming to lecture more than provoke.

This is not the case with Blood on Leaves.

4 – Dark Fantasy → My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy (2010)

Doing this list, however you cut it, teaches you something. Kanye has made some really fucking great music in his career.

With that explicitly stated, we have Dark Fantasy. The fact is that this ranking might not do this song justice. It has all the great aspects of an all-time great Kanye track.

The intro feels like a kids story turned dark right at the end. The hook is amazingly done, providing insight into the way Ye sees himself. The top, better yet, the very top. He’s actually asking if it actually gets any higher than where he is. All performed with beautiful vocals that seem more heavenly than arrogant.

Then Kanye spits bars on bars on bars on top of a very old school rap beat. Just Kanye performing some verbal acrobatics in a way that resonates with hip-hop fans of any era. It’s this kind of performing that puts him all-time lists with other great pure rappers like Nas.

The fact is that this track would be number one a lot of lists if it were made by another artist. But alas, Kanye’s discography is a lot like the 2017 Golden State Warriors. Three can only be three in a Big Three. Sorry Klay Thompson, and sorry Dark Fantasy.

3 – Touch the Sky → Late Registration (2005)

Along with the aforementioned Gold Digger and Jesus Walks, this song is among Kanye’s most famous. Like the others, it grabs your attention from the start, giving you only four small beats to prepare for a vibrant experience blossoming with energy and optimism.

The reason this song gets a higher place on this list is the incredible interaction between the orchestra, Kanye’s choice of tone and even a strong Lupe Fiasco feature. Kanye also puts forth one of his stronger performances from a verbal gymnastics perspectives. Some Kanye songs you can kind of keep up with lyrically. Other than the chorus, anything Kanye vocalises on this track is pretty tough to follow for longer than a few seconds.

For being a nice blend between mainstream hit, pure rap skill and that dash of Kanye flavour, Touch The Sky opens up the top three.

2 – Runaway → My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy (2010)

Runaway will certainly be one of Kanye’s greatest career accomplishments. The opening piano keys are hauntingly beautiful, consuming the listener with confusing but real emotions from the very beginning. It’s the anticipation that get’s you, like in a horror film when you’re waiting for the jump scare. Then the different note rings in you ear and you feel it. That’s just the first twenty seconds of a nine minute emotional odyssey.

The song sends chills down your spine from the start and is best consumed in a dark room with your eyes closed. It’s what Kanye West does better than many artists in history. Then the song actually starts and it has an effect, a personal one at that.

Kanye is unravelling himself in song. He acknowledges his arrogance, the fact that he is not perfect whilst also admitting himself to be a perfectionist. It’s a raw self reflection where it seems that Ye struggles both with a pursuit of perfection in his life but also knows ultimately that nothing can remain totally without flaw forever.

It’s Kanye’s perception on the fleeting nature of beauty and love. It feels so intimate all the way through, the kind of connection the song makes is the kind you only experience sparingly in life.

Then there’s the outro. An over three minute voyage. Just auto tuned and indecipherable vocals over the haunting but classically beautiful instrumentals. Much in the way one can become entranced with the mystery of a Frank Ocean track, the outro provides and incredible conclusion to a perfect song.

1 – Ultralight Beam → The Life of Pablo (2016)

There are some great tracks that have been discussed in this piece and even more that didn’t even get a honorable mention. Some club bangers. Some heartfelt ballads. Some joyous proclamations of the joy of life. Some angry protests. With the close study of every track and skit on every album Ye has ever released, there is an undeniable truth.

Ultralight Beam is the greatest track Kanye West has ever made.

I understand the opposing argument. The Life of Pablo as an album has many flaws. The Kanye you get in TLOP overall is not the best Kanye we have ever been fortunate to experience. No song on that album had the mainstream acclaim of other songs. Nor did it universally get approved by every diehard hip-hop fan. TLOP is an average Kanye West album, mainly because it has too many songs that feel like filler. Whilst I don’t agree with all these assertions, I do understand them.

But none of those arguments have anything to do with Ultralight Beam.

It feels heavenly, divine, omnipotent and enlightening. I still remember driving around with my sister when I first heard it. My heart melted with the transition from the girl talking about God to those incredible chords and vocals. The instrumentals are insane, undeniably some of Kanye’s best producing work.

Then the choir hits. The choir is beautiful. The choir is exactly what it says it is. A god dream.

A deep beat, soul melting chords and an inspiring choir all collide to touch a very sensitive part of your very being you never knew. Kelly Price’s voice is the definition of musical beauty. All of this all time great Kanye work builds to what clinches the title for best Kanye track. The best verse of 2016 performed by Chance the Rapper. There’s too much about this verse that is great to limit it to one part. The song built perfectly to that voice, with those words over that beat.

If you’re still not totally convinced, listen to the last twenty seconds of that song a few times. Listen to it from beginning to end by yourself and really listen. That build over a song to the incredibly beautiful ending is what Kanye has thrived on his whole career. This is his greatest example of it.

It’s okay to disagree. The denial is expected. I sought out another answer. A great spiritual journey was undertaken. Many a possibility pondered. But in the end, there can only be one.

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