#i am trying to reclaim my ugly balding zitbeardness LOL

[delusionland]

hc: john constantine

constantine is canonically. canonically. not really the conventionally pretty boy we see in modern comics / cartoons. his face & body is weathered---his skin is hard & often sweaty or greasy, stubbled, wrinkled even before he hits 40, and he’s always making the expression that he just sucked on a lemon. his brow is permenantly creased and his jaw is permeanantly pushed forward to the point he looks abit like a bulldog. when he relaxes, really relaxes, u can see that there ONCE was a pretty boy in there, somewhere! but there isn’t, anymore, and there hasn’t been for a very long time. u can tell this man doesn’t take care of himself---CANONICALLY the man will go for days without eating or drinking water, instead, just engaging in his nicotine habit---to the point, in my opinion, that the facial hair around his lips are stained slightly yellow. the less said about his teeth the better.

but constantine, for all his faults & the flaws in his appearance---draws people in all the same. he has a charm that outweighs the things he’s done & what he looks like. he may not look like or be friendly, but he’s funny, always down for a good time, always ready to save the world in the worst of ways. he’s a bad-good kind of person, but it’s so easy... so easy to see the good in him, when he smiles & he laughs and he treats you like a friend even when you’re obviously not.

you can see the hurt in him, you can see the good in him. it’s so easy to remember the good times with constantine. it’s so easy to treat him like a friend.

constantine just feels ‘realer’ than pretty. he feels like a real person to you, he feels like the people you see on the street and who you WONDER about, even as they blend into the crowd like everyone else who isn’t a beautiful supermodel. where they’re going, what their life is like.

constantine is strange & magical in a ‘that guy at the pub / that guy on the side of the street smoking’ kind of way. he’s not beautiful---he’s not nice----he’s just INTERESTING, he’s just REAL. he draws people in---even when he pushes u away. 

constantine may not be conventionally pretty---but he still gets around, bc he has sexual confidence & bravado, he knows what he looks like and doesn’t care what other people think bc he knows what HE likes, and he’s got magical shit to do and he wants to bottom for king shark before the witching hour, so he doesn’t have time to consider ‘hey, am i ugly? should i start doing a korean skin care routine?’ NO. he’s just ‘i’m sexy in a weird pitiful bulldog kind of way and that works for me and gets me laid, so i’m fine and i’m going to keep getting laid, thank u.’

#hc: hellblazer #ch: hellblazer #fandom: justice league dark #fandom: dc #fandom: vertigo #fandom: superheroes #this is the kind of person i am tbh #i am not conventionally attractive. i have yellow teeth and a double chin and cystic acne #but like. not every character has to be the most beautiful mother fucker u've ever seen #even despite being kind of an ugly fucker constantine Gets Around #he's charming and dangerous and mysterious and people connect with that #there are ways to be attractive beyond the body u were born with and that has been weathered bc of Lack of Self-Care #that is what i am trying to say with this #i am not trying to be an asshole #i am trying to reclaim my ugly balding zitbeardness LOL