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#i am so normal . about luigis mansion

secretlyurdad · 1 year

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LOOK AT HIM AHHHH

I saw that one video of him twiddling his thumbs AND I HAD TO MAKE A LITTLE ANIMATION FOR IT

#I am so normal about luigi #super mario bros #super mario #super mario bros movie #luigi #luigis mansion

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oogaboogaspookyman · 4 months

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GAME OVER

YOU FAILED, LUIGI

[ALONE]

[1]

what are you doing here..?

[2]

What do you want from me, you two?

Can't a plumber just mourn alone in peace?

It's nothing personal, friend!

We only came here to have some fun!

[3]

Can i at least find some peace for me?

Will i be hurt?

Friend or foe..?

We're not looking for any fight!

(I feel so empty, lost everything)

Just a little song!

(I paid the price)

Only one!

(I'm so ALONE)

[4]

Have you ever felt like your adventure had ended?

The second you have lost absolutely everything?

I'm so alone in this world now

All because i couldn't press on further, i'm so sorry...

*hahaha*

(Why did you come here? To bother?)

(Or have you appeared to grieve with me too?)

(I'm so alone, i'd like to not be)

(Maybe i could use your company after all...)

[5]

The two of you ghosts, why don't you harm me at all right now?

Aren't you under the service of the malicious King Boo in the mansion?

Shouldn't you force me to fall down on my knees and before him bow?

Are you really here to let me grieve in peace?

*ahahahaha!*

(Am i really singing with two random ghosts?)

(What am i doing with my life anymore?)

(What else can i do at this point?)

(When i'm just so ALONE?)

[6]

What's with the long face around here?

(i'm sorry for having failed you)

Let out your grievances

(i couldn't keep pressing on much more)

Sing a little with me, live again!

[7]

Have you ever grieved a person before?

It's painful and lasts long

IT'S PAINFUL AND SO LONG, IT HURTS ME

*CHEER UP, PLUMBER :)*

(It hurts

so much it makes me

want to end it)

[8]

My brother is stuck in your forsaken mansion

All because i couldn't keep on going

I only want him to just forgive me

But even that i doubt i will get

[9]

It hurts, it hurts to rid of my pain

(What doesn't hurt nowadays?)

It hurts and yet what else can i do at this point?

(But what else can you do at this point?)

That's fine, it's a normal thing to feel

(How come you're so nice to me?)

You're fine, you're pretty much powerless anyways!

(And yet you are all so condescending)

[10]

How come none of you ghosts ever tell of your motives?

How does it feel to play the king?

Is everyone a jester to you?

Why are you like this, let me grieve...

*why else am i here, stupid?*

[11]

Mourning my mistakes in this haunted house

(Look at me with a smile in your face!)

Everywhere i go, i see his face

(It's okay bro, you will be next soon!)

I can't run, nowhere left to hide

(He's gone, so what? Didn't he outshine you?)

I can't step out of his shadow

(Haha! Please, now you're just pathetic!)

[12]

Cheer up and keep on singing with me, plumber!

(Just leave me be, it's bad enough)

There's other things left in life before death!

(Stop it please, i don't want to hear this)

Come on now, pick up the pace soon

(Quit it please, i can't take it anymore)

I like my games a little harder!

(I already want to kill myself)

[13]

Mario

(LUIGI)

Forgive me please

(WHERE DID YOU GO?)

Oh brother

(I'M STRANDED)

I am sorry...

(LOST AND ALONE)

Who're you talking to now?

(LUIGI, WHERE DID YOU GO?)

It's not like your brother's here with us!

(I'm so sorry...)

(HELP ME, IT'S HELL IN HERE)

[14]

I'm sorry for having failed you

(It's always about your brother)

I couldn't keep pressing on much more, please...

(Always about poor Mario)

[15]

What's there to fail when he's not here?

(Why do you do this to me)

Stop being sorry and accept what's been done

(I want to rid myself of pain)

[16]

Pathetic plumber

[end]

#spooker's banger lyrics #fnf #mario madness #Luigi's Mansion #SoundCloud

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noelledeltarune · 11 months

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gooigi rant?? pls. i love the goo-ber

ok this is another case where i don't really have that much of substance to say but literally gooigi is so fucked up to me. like e gadd's research journal actually makes me kind of upset 💀💀. i know he has very little canon character but i am very endeared to gooigi and so just knowing about e. gadd's research journal kind of fucks me up :-(

like literally you read it and one of the first things said about goo is that its like. sentient to some extent. even as a blob. and it's capable of reacting to stimulus. when water is poured on it it actively like. moves away from the water to avoid melting. it can hear and will follow music being played.

so you see that and then it's like oh ok cool this thing is alive. sick. and so then there's the whole shebang with the using stolen dna thing to give gooigi like his actual physical form. and it's like oh okay cool so you've made a guy. that's a guy now. you made a person. 👍

and so then it's like the. weaknesses testing and stuff.

which like ok. whatever. sure. see like idk if gooigi just doesnt really care about the whole getting experimented on and hit with giant hammers and melted and set on fire thing so i'll also just say that's whatever. but like idk it kinda fucks me up in general just because of the last part LOL like

was this really necessary :-( like think with me. imagine you made a guy. you accidentally spilled coffee on some of the samples you were studying and it came to life and you so made a guy.

this guy is sentient. reacts to stimuli. can definitely act independently because you cannot play as gooigi in 1p mode in the luigi's mansion 3ds port.

so like this is the main point of the post because it just messes me up soooo baddddd like i have never ever imagined gooigi as a tool even playing lm3 in 1p mode just because of the way that he like. is a separate guy from luigi. not really questionably. like when you collect something as one the other will still react (even if you're only controlling luigi while gooigi is out of the tank, gooigi'll give a little thumbsup yknow). the several cutscenes where gooigi just acts on his own independently of luigi like right after you beat king boo + the ending + several of the credits photos if my memory serves correctly. that's a guy. so hearing e gadd be like "oh man this person i made has his own thoughts and feelings and doesnt listen to me sometimes. i think i will possess him." is just like. was that really the only option. did you HAVE to do that.

like i'm sorry this is becoming just mainly pictures but 😭😭 wow so crazy how embedding a chip in someone to control them will stop them from acting independently and doing what they would normally do if they could control their actions... and like the fact he landed on POSSESSION of all things as the best way to control gooigi like 😭😭 this kinda shit's always happening to guys who's names end in uigi

also like kind of unrelated but can you imagine being luigi and finding out about this? like "wow you used my dna to make a guy and then spent hours of rigorous testing trying to and eventually succeeding in quashing his free will so you could possess it to hunt ghosts? thats nice" he doesnt actually know about this as far as i'm aware but it's the principal of the thing :-( i feel like it would upset him

ANYWAYS point is i like gooigi and always imagined him as like being his own character so the research journal fucks me up a little 💀 top ten moments that really cement e gadd's status as a fucked up scientist.

in general to me i feel like he definitely got meaner over the years :-( which makes me kind of sad because in lm1 his main goal definitely seemed to be like..helping luigi LOL. like he saved his life and seemed genuinely concerned when he found out about mario being a real man who has since been captured. and he helped luigi to get mario back without it feeling necessarily like his primary goal was in his own self interest. but a lot of his dialogue just feels really mean in dark moon and lm3 goes like almost the opposite way. this section in particular always stood out to me as feeling out of character compared to him in the original

and like i could be wrong about dark moon because i've never played it but just like reading the dialogue on the wiki was like 😬😬 he was SOOO mean to luigi like

reading half of these was just like man if i were him i would have cried i'm serious 😭

and this is of course not to say that i hate e gadd in general but i will admit to not really liking him much after dark moon

#ask tag #talk tag #ultimately not much of substance was said here but the gooigi thing is gonna make me sad for always #goodbye lm1 and PiT e gadd you will be missed forever to me #//#long post

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yanderes-galore · 2 years

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Since you gave the ok, could I request a platonic King Boo (the one from Luigi’s mansion) with a scaredy-cat reader? Like, the reader is like Luigi, scared of their own shadow and stuff like that, and lives at the edge of Boo Woods, but always tries to be respectful of the ghosts and boos despite their fear of them. Also, E. Gadd and them are kind of neighbors, so when reader finds out that he’s researching them and even invented a weapon against them, they try to dissuade him because they knew he would only piss off the ghosts. Reader even begged E. Gadd to free Boolossus when they found out he caught them, which is what piqued King Boo’s interés in the first place.

Hm... This sounds really cool to write! I'll see what I can do.

Yandere! Platonic! King Boo Concept

Luigi's Mansion

Pairing: Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Yandere-like behavior, Platonic Yandere, Manipulation, Kidnapping.

- You may be utterly terrified of the ghosts in Boo Woods, but you still respect them.

- The normal ghosts and Boos even often talk about you.

- You're fun to scare but kind nonetheless to them.

- Even begging that old coot to not capture any of them.

- Knowledge of your existence will soon reach the mansion where King Boo currently resides.

- The Boos often visit your home, much to your displeasure.

- Yet they get a few scares out of you before you give a nervous smile and escort them out.

- King Boo is intrigued a skittish person like you would live by a haunted woods.

- However, he does wish to meet you in person.

- His Boos seem to like you... why don't you meet with him?

- He promises you the best hospitality.

- You may end up at the mansion by invitation or hearing that Luigi is going to use the Poltergust against the ghosts there.

- Either way, once you're there, the doors are locked and you're trapped.

- You hesitantly pace about the mansion after finding out you're locked in.

- Even finding boos you've seen in the past at your home.

- In the most courage you can muster you wave to some of them, only for them to perk up and fly through a wall.

- The longer you're here, the more scared you become.

- You aren't sure why the Boos are leaving you alone... until you meet King Boo himself.

- Turns out, they were reporting your presence to him.

- "I see my Boos weren't lying about you! I am delighted to finally meet you."

- Upon meeting the king himself you most likely cower.

- King Boo finds this amusing, but surprisingly, treats you nicely.

- You aren't related to Luigi at all, you care for his kind, and you even wish for the captured ghosts to be freed.

- If anything he considers you a friend that's welcome in this mansion.

- Which is lucky for you, other than the constant pranks/scaring.

- "I appreciate your views against E. Gadd's troublesome machine. Who knew you'd agree with me~?"

- While you have your greatest fear now friends with you, you still have problems.

- Such as the fact the longer you're here... the more King Boo wants to keep you in the mansion.

- He doesn't care if he has to warp your sense of reality to do it or not.

- He doesn't have much of anyone else to talk to but the ghosts and Boos here.

- So why don't you stay?

- You'll be given the best comfort, food, water, everything your little mortal body needs to survive.

- Just as long as you stay here and talk to him.

- Isn't it a good deal?

- Why stay in that small house of yours instead of a mansion like this?

- All of his points are correct, in his mind at least.

- Convincing you should be easy.

- However, if you refuse, he has answers for that.

- "Aw, I thought you'd make this easier on me, scaredy-cat~? Looks like I WILL have to be a bit more forceful on you, my friend!"

- King Boo, no matter how he likes you, would trap you in a painting.

- You'll be the most beautiful painting in this mansion to him.

- A friend he keeps in his chamber to talk and monolog to.

- He'll keep you and protect you as you're just so precious to him.

- Not even that green plumber he hates so much will find/take you....

- Your newly formed friendship/bond will be everlasting!

- "Look on the brightside! At least this way you'll last forever~!"

#yandere luigi's mansion #yandere king boo #platonic yandere #yandere platonic king boo

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tagarilaghost · 2 years

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YOO I MADE IT IN TIME!!! The underrated character challenge thing!!! HERE IT IS!!

Of course. I had to do King Boo. Anyways for this challenge I wrote a oneshot about King Boo‘s point of view in the Luigi’s Mansion series. Mostly with OC‘s and my own headcanons of what happened between certain events. This part is from one of the last missions from Luigi’s Mansion: Dark Moon.

Originally I planned just a oneshot for this, but I might write new parts in the future. For now, enjoy my entry for @thereaderinsertlady s challenge!

I have no idea how you can like cut off the text on my phone :,)

A Different View Of The King Of The Boos

Part 1: A Different View Of Bravery

I‘m brave. I‘m a brave king. I do this for my people. Isn‘t that what I‘m supposed to do? Protect them? Save them from all the dangers out there? I have to strike back. I have to strike him down tonight.

My preparations are almost complete. I ordered as many strong ghosts as I could inside the Paranormal Dimension and once I give them a signal, the humans are doomed. My armies of the dead will launch at THIS GODDAMN PLUMBER, like stomach-empty vultures waiting for their crawling prey. No matter what he does, he‘s a dead body already.

Nothing will change his sealed fate.

And when he‘s finally gone…

…EVERYONE will cower in fear, as this pitiful world collapses. On their knees, they‘ll bow. Before me.

„Sir, I have a question.“

I look to the Boo, floating left of me.

Right behind him is the gate to all of my dreams. The golden gateway as I like to call it. This rising half-moon out of pure gold, hold in the air by two massive golden pillars. The place where I will create a portal, so powerful, that everyone I so carefully escorted in there can launch out of it at once!

„SIR! Are you listening?!“, Boolt exclaimed.

„I am listening. We do not need questions right now. You may ask them later, Boolt.“, I gift the grimm Boo a blank stare, „Is everything in perfect order?“

Boolt tightens his dark-red bandana.

„Yes, your majesty. The troops are ready and our army will launch when you give the signal.“, Boolt salutes, but puts the noble gestures quickly aside,

„Your majesty, you know I won’t debate even a tiny bit about your decisions, but are you sure, that you want to release everyone at the same time out of that portal?“

I growl and my focused visage changes to a menacing grimace.

„Why does it matter? With such a force… I WILL FINALLY STRIKE THAT BLASTED PLUMBER DOWN!!“

„With all due respect, it could lead to a collapse of this whole world, sir! We all could vanish!“, he counters and I almost loose it. HOW DARE HE to even QUESTION my choices!

„SILENCE! You heard me, Boolt. I WANT THAT PLUMBER DEAD and I will do EVERYTHING in my power to make him. Now GO and get out of my sight, he‘ll arrive shortly.“, I order and instantly regret it. Boolt is my most loyal and probably closest friend. The least I can do is consider the options he so carefully presents to me.

They all rely on me after all.

„… As you wish, your majesty. Just… be careful.“, he bows and floats away.

„I will.“

As the loyal Boo leaves, no noise dares to interrupt the showdown that is about to begin.

I‘m thrilled to end it once and for all.

The door swings open.

HE steps inside. His steps make a horrible racket. So loud and creaky, that even the stupidest mouse would flee out of sight.

Then he sees me.

I know that he must have seen me, because he stopped. He‘s just so predictable.

And fun~!

That‘s it. He is right behind me. If I turn around I‘ll have to look at his idiotic little face. But…~ I would see all the scars that I brought him. I would just swell over with lust. Lust to end this game forever. Lust to win.

I laugh. This is ridiculous. I laugh again.

Why does this confrontation make my feelings so intense?! Normally I can control my emotions. Why won’t they listen to me now?! I can’t stand it. Why is it so IMPORTANT to me?!?

I laugh for the third time. My crown starts to glow and I see sanity drift away from my mind. There‘s only vengeance left.

As I fire purple lighting, the portal comes to life. When I fly in there, the human world will realize their wrongdoings and finally plead for mercy, as I tear every last of their belongings apart without even moving an eyebrow.

There is no place left for empathy or sympathy.

They took EVERYTHING from me. Now is my time to take everything from them.

With one final laugh, I fly into the portal and give Luigi a side-smirk, full of lust for a fight, vengeance and triumph.

This…. will be your last taste of life.

Enjoy it. While you still can.

#king boo #luigi #luigi's mansion #boos #luigis mansion #boo #nintendo #mario #my stuff #luigis mansion dark moon #underrated character event #a different view of the king of the boos

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cswizzledizzle · 11 months

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Random observations of the trophies in Super Smash Bros. Melee, because I thought they were interesting - Part 6

We're at the finale now, so let's end it with some random trivia! Luigi has three designs as a trophy; his design during the N64 era, his design in Melee (based more on the 64 design), and his Luigi's Mansion design, which may actually be his model from that game. Also Luigi in Luigi's Mansion has shoelaces and I don't think any other game has that.

Bowser's Classic trophy has that anime vein thing.

Peach's Classic trophy has legs that clip through the dress.

Unlike her fellow princess, Peach does not have a third eye.

Pichu's Classic trophy depicts it with pure black eyes while the Smash trophies (at least Red, because Blue has the eyes closed) depict it with black eyes that fades to a blue at the bottom.

Mewtwo's Melee head shape is more "squarish" compared to its Classic trophy. Colorization is also slightly different, using a darker gray than white.

I believe this is the only game where stages have trophies, though may be wrong on that. I'm also not counting the Great Fox, since that's more of an object than a location.

Unlike later games, Pikachu is not the first trophy for Pokémon series; that goes to Bulbasaur, due to Melee listing the Pokémon in Pokédex order, the former being #25 and the latter being #1.

Mario is the first trophy in the Normal and Game organization categories, but not the A - Z one for obvious reasons. That would be Alpha.

And finally, a non-trophy thing I wanted to bring up. In Melee, Marth's white alt is based on the character Leif, from Fire Emblem: Thracia 776, the fifth game in the series. What makes this version of the alt different from later white alts is the faded blue color to it, the inner bright red of the cape, and the gold trimmings to his armor.

Later games do not have the faded blue, dulled the red, and replaced the gold trimmings with white. It doesn't look as good in my opinion and I feel like it loses that cool reference. I know this has nothing to do with trophies, but I really wanted to bring this up.

Okay, I am finally done rambling about the trophies and giving you my oddly specific notes/trivia. And of course, as per usual, to those that have gotten this far, thank you for giving this and any other post I've made about this subject the time out of your day/night to read my inane ramblings.

#nintendo #smash bros #super smash bros #super smash bros melee #super smash melee #trophies #Marth's white alt got done dirty #Bring back the original colors #Justice for the Leif reference

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delusionland · 3 years

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stream of consciousness rant under the cut about teddy

teddy altman is the funniest character in the world because he’s LITERALLY /in/ the civil war event in a single panel with billy where they’re both like THIS IS FUCKED UP BRO! I DONT WANNA BE HERE!!!! and then he’s in the skrull invasion event where he could LITERALLY STOP THE SKRULL INVASION at ANY TIME and he’s just like ‘haha... i’m 16 bro and i kinda... don’t want to kinda busy being gay rn : / its a big time investment’ and thats also incredibly funny

but whats MOST funny is that all this happens to him, he’s literally an avenger, he has this whole thing with ‘mother’ in ya v2, he’s hot af 21 year old with his whole life in front of him but because he’s not related to any OTHER avengers except for the old captain marvel who is dead as a doornail and who he has a complicated relationship with, he’s like : (((( i have no purpose.... i’m sad... i’m gonna eat pizza bc my boyfriend is cooler than me he has two families : (((( and he’s friends with doctor strange... i’m not friends with doctor strange...

like obviously he just has depression and self-worth issues and such a strong sense of unreality that he briefly believed he was not a real person and was made up by his boyfriend?

but also.

like TEDDY ALTMAN. you FOOL. ur literally a SPACE PRINCE. ur COOL as fuck. stop playing animal crossing and luigis mansion. you can FLY. and SHAPESHIFT. idiot

how are you going to be living the transgay DREAM life and be like : (((( like teddy fucking altman. you wish fulfilment based fool

he’s like the most painfully normal gay guy in the universe like he might be a shapeshifter that has the abilitiy to turn himself into a hunk, but under that. he’s round spongebob with depression. his favorite game of thrones character was tyrion, which means he definitely didn’t read the books, AND he legitimately liked the show and the character of tyrion within it. i will never forgive him for that

i’m giving him a lot of shit here but thats because i’m an asshole. i love him to death. but it’s like ‘teddy u big boob with big boobs. sort ur shit out.’ and he does end up sorting his shit out. but jesus. how are you so normal

i think my problem with teddy & billy in general is they don’t feel REAL to me in a lot of ways bc a lot of their characterization is so by-the-numbers ‘gay’ but also ‘rich’ and ‘popular’ and ‘depressed’ so i like. this is NOT my gay experience. i’m a fat non-binary butch dyke agoraphobe. i can’t comprehend their story because it’s so fundamentally different to my own lived experience. and when i try to make it match up to mine---it feels like billy & teddy are living in a dream world where they have absolutely no flaws bc they’re forced into being ‘charming gay representation for teens to look up to’ and its like. what am i supposed to do with this. with the exception of the gillen run. which everyone??? hates now????? i don’t know. i love them. and more importantly i’m still trying to understand them on my own terms, how they’re written---what they really represent beyond being the most popular two charcters on r/lgbtsuperheroes, beyond winning glaad awards.

like who ARE they beyond billy and teddy. who are they beyond the labels and whats the latest in nerd culture and gay culture pop culture references!!!!

what makes a ‘canon gay character’ ‘canon gay’ and what makes them textured, layered, real? the second one is so much important to me, but how can i distill ‘realness’ and give it to those canon gay characters? how can i make one half of a pair which is about one third of a set make SENSE to me. feel like the gay people i know, feel like members of my community i can relate to and respect without feeling a sense of jealousy, a sense of self-hatred, a sense of being robbed of a universal experience of ‘canon gayness’ that doesn’t and will never exist?

this just has to be my next project tbh. getting back into young avengers, figuring this out.

how do ‘out gay people’ live, how do the ‘popular kids’ live, beyond maligned celebrities and royal families that i understand in their fucked up straightness---how does it feel to be accepted & acceptable and still gay AND MENTALLY ILL?

i don’t know, man! i don’t know! i think maybe i just can’t see the forest for the trees. but billy & teddy feel like too much to hope for in this world sometimes, too soft a story, too kind but also? too... fake? i got issues yall

#internalized homophobia tw #internalized ableism tw #thats probably my problem tbh

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maggotsandcream · 4 years

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Finally got around to watching a playthrough of Mario and Luigi: Partners in Time

I have thoughts as always, a lot of them. Spoilers ahoy!

First off, it is 100% on brand for E. Gadd to build a time machine and decide that the most ethical way to test it would be to send his head of state and her entourage into the past while taking exactly zero safety precautions. What's far more eyebrow raising is that clearly multiple other people starting with Peach herself had to sign off on this.

Maybe if past!Mushroom Kingdom employed an army that was composed of more than literally 2 toddlers they wouldn't have gotten so trounced by the aliens that it resembled the first part of a Doctor Who Christmas special.

I should note that none of these things are criticisms. I find the lack of two brain cells to rub together throughout the Mushroom Kingdom both past and present delightful.

I read a fan theory that the reason no one knew about the Shroobs in the present was because they hadn't actually attacked in the past at first and it was the whacky time machine antics that sucked them into the past from the present when they were originally going to attack the Mushroom Kingdom and oddly that tracks pretty well and I think I will adopt that as my own headcanon.

Of course, considering it's also Mario canon that multiple universes exist and the universe they live in periodically collapses and gets shuffled around could easily account for this too.

Baby Mario whacking everything in reach with his hammer is probably one of the more accurate portrayals of toddlers in video games. The rest of it obviously isn't, but that particular aspect jibes pretty well with my admittedly limited experience of 2-year-olds.

The enemies in general have pretty neat designs.

I liked that those elderly toad women being red/green twins called back to Superstar Saga where there were just so many red/green twins hanging around. Oddly, between the hammer bros and the Shroob princesses notably not following that pattern it seems like only twins with a good alignment get the red/green color scheme.

"Honey, the stork has arrived with our new babies! Isn't that wonderful?" "Oh yes but what color are their *whispers* hats?" "Fear not, they have a red and a green hat. They aren't predestined to become at best morally ambiguous." *sighs with relief*

"Toad and Toad, why have you taken to a life of crime? It pains me and your father so much." "You see mother, our favorite colors are...orange and blue." *sorrowful wailing*

"Mama, how come all the other twins in the village are red and green, but Toad and I are brown and green?" "You see Toad, there is this tragic medical condition known as evil twin syndrome..."

Doctors write up case study on a pair of identical twins who were both delivered with red hats. They get put through a whole battery of psych evals many times over to try to determine whether they are good, bad, or in between. Turns out they're literally just normal kids.

Wario and Waluigi would fit this pattern.

You can apparently have a good alignment with any color scheme as long as you don't have a twin, though.

Wait, so Luigi's Mansion implies that E. Gadd is 80 and that he'd been researching ghosts for about 60 years, but Partners in Time implies that he's 40 and has only been researching them for 20 years? I suppose it's possible that the age difference came about through irresponsible time machine use considering that it's canon that he kept the time machine and used it again having learned nothing but who knows.

Actually, how many of these games' plots are the result of E. Gadd throwing caution to the wind, lmao.

Between fat shaming Mario and just plain bullying Luigi, the Star Gate is a bit of a prick. That said, I'm really curious what he told Luigi is horrible sins were that were preventing him from going through the gate. Sure, he was bluffing in order to test Mario, but whatever he said was something that Luigi at least thought was horrible enough to disqualify himself and did not want revealed out loud to the group. I actually went looking for speculation on this because I think it would be really interesting but I haven't been able to find any. So I'll start with a bit of my own speculation:

"I couldn't help but notice you have a little bit of a cowardice and jealousy problem." "I know, and I know that if my brother and our past selves noticed this, the most obvious pair of flaws I have which everyone keeps commenting on, they surely will abandon me and no longer love me.😔" "...You've also got massive problems with understanding how other people perceive you."

"Look, I don't care if he started it, but it was not very heroic of you to threaten to beat Purple Mustache to death with his own tennis racket. Seriously, what's wrong with you? You've got to be the bigger person here." "But he's literally bigger than me." "The fate of the world rests upon my judgment of your soul and you think this is the time for sarcasm and backchat?!" "Oh no, you're right. I am such a selfish person.😔"

"Actually, you're basically fine Green Mustache, but I'm legally required to put the hero through a moral test before letting the party through, the hero in this case being your brother. Can I have your cooperation for the next few minutes? It needs to look like I just scolded you for something." "Yes of course. 😔"

#nintendo #mario #luigi #partners in time #mario and luigi #e. gadd

13 notes · View notes

itsclownhours · 3 years

Conversation

merlin as tumblr posts again because when i edited a typo in the original it fucked up the formatting

everyone: you have to make time for yourself

morgana: *stays up until 1 am every night crying* me time

morgana: ohhhh so the pain is forever and endless i get it now

young!mordred: once i learn how to read and write it’s over for you hoes

lancelot, in cursive: i can’t read cursive handwriting

gwaine: what does this say

elyan: i can’t read cursive handwriting

gwaine: bitch me neither that’s why i asked

arthur, to merlin, about lancelot: is he...y’know…*gestures downard to super hell*

uther, straight: hey what’s up guys do you want to go get some food

arthur and morgana, gay: ??????

uther: oh sorry i mean asgdhjdhs guys do you??? want some food??? lmao ashdjdjhs

arthur and morgana: oh! agshdjjshsj yeah lmao agshdj

morgana: do you ever associate the word “girlfriend” with wlw so much that you forget straight boys have girlfriends

gwen: am taking care of a tiny kitten. have given it an excellent name. dad thinks i’m calling her “minty” but this is actually short for The Government

gwen: The Government bit my finger and pooped on the floor

gwaine: peak art is when you were like six and you scribbled all over ms paint and then carefully paintbucketed in all the different shapes in the scribbles to make “stained glass”

morgause: forcing my car to commit sins so it goes to hell with me when i die

leon, after arthur gives the knights a pep talk: so motivational...time to drill a hole in my skull

morgana: i want to be a she really did that!! kind of girl but i don’t do anything

arthur: pros and cons of being my friend:

arthur: pro: you have a friend

arthur: con: it’s me

gwaine, to lancelot: bro let’s watch a horror movie together...bro you look scared do you wanna share a blanket dude? if you wanna hold hands it’s ok. if you wanna rest your head on my shoulder it’s alright bro...bro if you wanna kiss that’s understandable that was a scary movie...we can keep cuddling after the movie is over it’s alright dude…

lancelot: old town road but he just keeps listing all the places he has horses

gwaine: i got the horses in the back

gwaine: horses on the track

gwaine: horses in the shack and i got horses fetching snacks

gwaine: i got the horses in earth’s core

gwaine: down under the floor

gwaine: horses in the store and i got horses on the moor

gwaine: died and came back as a cowboy i call that reintarnation

morgana: *shows up at college* excuse me will someone please direct me to the leftist brainwashing class? i’m here for the leftist brainwashing class

merlin: finally found someone i was more disappointed in that myself: the entirety of america camelot

morgause: customer (derogatory)

arthur: business major (derogatory)

leon: leonardo dicaprio date a woman over 25 challenge

gwaine: thought that said “leonardo da vinci” and was confused since da vinci was gay and also since you were calling out someone who’s been dead for well over 7 years

leon: well. da vinci has been well over 7 years, i’ll give you that

morgana: the retirement age needs to be lowered to 25. i’ve had enough

gwaine: i’m fucking in luigi’s mansion

leon: who?

gwaine: some italian freak

gwaine: oh you meant who am i fucking. your mom

leon: stop setting things on fire because you’re curious about what will happen. what will happen is fire

gwaine: but what if...something else happens. just this 1 time

morgause: bored? burn an orphan. who’re they gonna tell? their parents?

morgana: due to personal reasons i will be a serial arsonist

mithian: fruit (affectionate)

arthur: going to the fruit (derogatory) store do you want anything

gwen: fruit (salad, yummy yummy)

morgana, to gwen: i’m allergic to hookup culture and too weird to participate anyway. die in my arms

kilgharrah: i am fast and full of teeth. i will die in a barn fire

morgana: not evil anymore i want to be loved now

morgana: evil again

morgause: every day i put on my evil little clothes and do my evil little tasks

percival: megan thee stallion and timothee chalamet are the same age

gwaine: megan thee stallion 🤝 timo thee chalamet

morgana: hey how many swords do you have

morgause: sword of a lot

morgana: blocked

morgause: parried

morgana and gwen simultaneously in 1x10: *chanting* girls with swords girls with swords

morgana: the more knives you have the more valid you are

kilgharrah: blocked. blocked. blocked. you’re all blocked. none of you are free from sin.

morgana: seven deadly sins speedrun

gwaine: i want 6 pet sloths so i can name them after every sin except for sloth

merlin: the eighth deadly sin is networking

arthur: online school culture is constantly wondering if there’s a sneaky little assignment you missed...is it tucked under modules or assignments or heaven forbid, announcements? who’s to say?

gaius: asynchronous learning

merlin, a clown: mmmnaptime

arthur: have you ever just cried because you’re you

elyan, to percival: bro, we are teens . it’s ok to cry around me . i’m your best friend . i love you … bro we are kissing now … no don’t stop bro … bro …

morgana: mad bc i was told as the bride my wedding would be “my day” but actually where will be a whole other bride there and we will have to share it

leon: i’m disgusted every time someone does a gender reveal and it’s about a gender i already know about, what kind of reveal is that

leon: gender reveal party??? no, this is a gender repeal party. we out here revoking genders

gwaine: you’re laughing. i asked you who sings party rock anthem and you’re laughing

gwaine: make no mistake not only am i party rocking but i’m also in the house tonight

elyan: are you shuffling?

gwaine: everyday

morgana: lung extensions

morgana: with extended lungs you can: scream longer, breathe harder, brag about extended lungs

morgana: this procedure is not legal but i will do it for you

morgana: do not tell the police or morgause

morgana: i’m so sick of dna, i’m going to have all mine removed

morgause: good news! this is a real thing that can happen to you

morgana: perfect, sign me up

morgana: if YOU die because i poisoned you...how is that MY fault like i’m sorry you aren’t immune to my poisons i think that’s genuinely something you need to work on. fix yourself before blaming others

arthur: my body is NOT a “temple”...it is a CLOWN CAR and NONE OF THESE BITCHES KNOW HOW TO DRIVE

morgause: live

morgause: laugh

morgause: l u r k

mcdonald’s employee: please sir get off the table

gwaine: I ASKED FOR TWO LARGE FRIES *dumping bag of fried out onto the floor* BUT INSTEAD GOT A HUNDRED FUCKEN LITTLE ONES

merlin: i relate to vampires because i too must be clearly and specifically invited in before i have the audacity to try to participate in anything

gwaine: it can’t be september, just yesterday is was marchgustuary

lancelot: today’s date: [REDACTED]/[REDACTED]/20

gwaine: why are internet friends not normalized. it’s 2020 they’re probably making robots that will wipe your ass for you and i can’t text grace in the uk and tell her to have a good day? fuck you

percival: imagine if halsey was in beauty and the beast

elyan: are you insane like gaston. been in pain like gaston. bought a hundred dollar bottle of champagne like gaston

arthur: my dad is learning about pronouns/gender identity and he called me in the middle of the night to tell me he is cis

merlin: ough. those first 400 bites of dirt were not so good. maybe the next one will be better

morgana: i’m at the dark candy store, buying sorrowful ranchers

merlin: i’m surprised no one has ever punched me in the face

gwen: i want a gf so i can send her memes about loving my gf

morgause: oh to cook with my wife and stand directly in front of cabinets and drawers she needs to open

morgause: decided i will no longer be paying taxes. what are they gonna do, tax me more? go ahead. i won’t pay those either. oh i’m going to prison? the one paid for by my tax dollars? sorry, didn’t pay em. now there is no prison. i am at least 3 steps ahead of the government at all times

merlin: lab safety but the teacher just wants to you die

merlin: lab safety: 1. drink whatever’s in that beaker. i know you fucking want to

morgause: my therapist is selling her house so i’m gonna find the listing online and make her living room my zoom backgrounds before our next session. you wanna get in my head? ok well i’m in your home babe. i’m in charge now

morgana: yeah i see why you’re in therapy

morgana: i hate it when people ask me to “explain my thought process” like hell if i know

morgana: what’s going on in that head of yours?” nothing i want to be a part of

mordred: hey girls what’s the hot gossip what’s new what’s the 411

morgana and morgause: everything is bad and getting worse by the day

morgause: common letter greetings from 1889

morgause: dearest my-soon-to-be-enemy

morgause: salutations and i hope you enjoy contact prison

morgause: i hope this letter finds you in a ditch

arthur: *highlights all the wrong and unimportant stuff with full confidence*

merlin: i’ve tried opening my mouth and saying words before and i’ve gotta say, i’m not a fan

morgana: a large group of humans is called a fuck that

website: synonyms for blood: juice

mithian: thank you thesaurus.com, that is absolutely not what i was looking for

gwaine: gen z humor was single-handedly cultivated by the zoo wee mama comic and you can’t convince me otherwise

morgana: screw this it’s halloween now *turns into a swarm of bats them consumes the moon*

morgana: i can’t believe the heterosexuals are gone. they’re gone

uther: we’re still here

arthur: who said that

gwaine: no more france

gwaine: society has progressed passed the need for france

morgause: girls night out (of body experience)

morgana, to morgause: what do you mean “what have i been up to”...i’m out here ruining my own life as always bitch

merlin: stop complaining about your life. there are literally people living in camelot

arthur, trying to find new knights: oh so you’re a human? name three pictures with traffic lights in them

gwaine: we mcfreaking lost her doctor

morgause: looking for a wife in the walmart

morgause: arrested for visiting www.killing.com/murder

gwaine, to merlin: no bro this isn’t a date listen bro

gwaine: it’s bruhnch

morgause, to cenred: if you think i’m not interested, you’re right

gwen: put a pancake on a girl’s head when she’s asleep to keep her warm and safe

morgana: idk what mad scientist needs to hear this today but your goggles and lab coat are incredibly flattering and all your experiments will block away the scientific community who called you a fool

morgause: i’m gonna fucking die disease

morgause: symptoms: back hurts a bit too much for a bit too long

arthur: if you think i’m annoying now wait until i get over my fear of being perceived as annoying

merlin: sorry if i’m bothering you

surgeon: how do you keep waking up and saying that

gwaine: home depot needs more small tunnels for me to crawl through tbh

percival: hot tip: soup is customizable! go wild but know your limits

morgana: brains say “i know a spot” and take you to a traumatic memory from 2011

mithian: “can you multitask” yes actually i am losing my mind and chilling at the same time

morgana: quarantine schedule to keep you on track

morgana: wake up

morgana: neglect online school

morgana: yearn (ongoing project)

morgana: again!

mithian: if cats don’t want to be held like little babies maybe they shouldn’t be roughly the size and shape of little babies

morgause: fuck this pandemic i could’ve ruined 2020 on my own

morgana: a cute girl told me she has lots of plants in her house and i told her for some fucking reason “damn the oxygen at your place must be mad crisp” and somehow still got her number so. chase your dreams. nothing is impossible apparently

morgana: oh to wear a knife strapped against my thigh beneath a silk dress

morgana, running off with morgause at the end of season 2: i hate this place i want to go to build a bear

morgana, at work: i’m evil

morgana, 1 second after clocking out: not evil anymore i want to be loved now

morgana, the next day at work: evil again

season 2 morgana: i am fine thank you for asking! though recently there has been a darkness growing within me

morgause: *thinks about love* okay well i am just losing my mind and being insane now

arthur: you think you can hurt my feelings? i’ve been the least favorite in every single friendship group i’ve had since i was 8

morgana, staring out the window at arthur and merlin: look at them plotting my downfall

mithian: i wanna buy clown noses in bulk and start sticking them on every person i see whose mask is pulled too low

mithian: oh to be a tiny cat whose biggest concern is the looming threat of being gently picked up and kissed on the head

morgana: i deserve to be kissed

morgana: did you have a homoerotic friendship with a girl in high school that ended in tragedy and you two are never talking again or are you normal?

mithian: just diagnosed with forehead kiss deficiency :/

morgana: i think i’ll continue to wear a mask when this shit’s all over, and huge sunglasses. my face is none of your business

morgause: my therapist told me that sometimes when a person consumes the same piece of media over and over they may be unconsciously coping with a mental block so now i’m trying to figure out what the fuck i was going through that made me watch ratatouille 8 times a day for a solid month in middle school

morgause: opposite of depression nap. depression awakeness. refreshing the same three websites over and over. there’s nothing new on any of them. eight seconds have passed and it feels like a century

morgana: very homophobic that my head is not laying on the chest of my maidservant as i am drifting off to sleep

merlin: no no, it’s fine, i’ll text myself back

morgana: *pines* *longs* *yearns* *pines* *longs* *yearns* *pines* *longs* *yearns* *pines* *longs* *yearns* *pines* *longs* *yearns* *pines* *longs* *yearns* *pines* *longs* *yearns* *pines* *longs* *yearns*

arthur: i’d have to be a fool not to? being a fool and not doing things are my top two activities

gwaine: you think it’s easy to be me? you think it’s easy to get up every. single. day. and be an industrial grade dumbass? well it’s not. but that’s what i do. and i’ll never stop.

morgana: ah shit i’m sorry man, my schedule for the week is all booked

sunday: yearn

monday: pine

tuesday: long

wednesday: ache

thursday: sigh

friday: lament

saturday: crave

morgana: talents include: being a public menace, denying God’s will, petting dogs, yearning, being dramatic, witchcraft, quoting classic literature when no one asked, napping, befriending a murder of crows, being gay, covering up my emotions by being “the funny friend” when in reality i’m really going through it, wistfully staring out the car window

merlin: *doesn’t even do the bare minimum* all in a day’s work

cenred: a “period” is not an excuse to have an attitude

morgause: i miss the times when men would go to war and die

morgana: the cheap halloween vampire fangs stay ON during sex

gwen: maybe i pspspspsp’ed you because i love you. did you think of that? huh?

morgana: mom said it’s my turn to hand out the ominous and vague warnings

arthur: that wasn’t mom

uther: she JUST SAID it was her turn

morgause: i’m a chill person but if my back doesn’t stop hurting i’m going to take out my spine and beat God with it

mithian: one of these days i’m going to say the f word

mithian: then you’ll all be sorry

morgause: 3 words every girl wants to hear

morgause: club penguin membership

morgana: hmm, yes.

morgana: time to s i p

morgana: some *~crispy~*

morgana: d i h y d r o g e n m o n o x i d e

morgause: roll call! raise your hand if you’re in the following fandoms:

morgause: 1. suffering 2. the pain of living

morgana: *raises both hands and a leg*

leon: it’s so hard being a single mom when you have no kids and are a male teenager

merlin: yeah bro hit me up and we’ll cancel some plans sometime

morgana: my brain, or as i like to call it, the suffer contraption

morgause: my circle so small i almost cut myself off

morgause hyping herself up before entering any public area: i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal i’m normal

arthur: today in french we learned how to say “what’s in the bag” and i couldn’t stop laughing because

arthur: swaggity swag qu’est-ce qui dans le sac

merlin: even when i am not speaking, know that horrible sentences are raging within me

mithian in 5x04: sorry bro i can’t go out tonight. i’m stuck in an eternal state of melancholy

morgause: shower gel label: immerse yourself in this new “Me Time” luxury frooty tooty. abandon all sense of identity and dissolve your memories into this soothing chemical broth. one billion melons are in this tube...use them wisely

leon, writing a headline about the most recent knights’ mission: local dumbasses knew that what they were getting themselves into and did it anyways

morgana: *feels random pain in body*

morgana: kill me

mithian: *slowly inches closer to your pet*

morgause: *refuses to look at texts* i love conversation and communication

arthur: cute gender neutral things to call your partner

arthur: significant annoyance

leon: the most unrealistic fantasy trope is the one where half of the pair works in some sort of shop and one is a customer because i have literally never thought about a customer with anything other than contempt

gwaine: why is everyone talking about 1d all of a sudden did one of them die

elyan: they’re 10 years old now

gwaine: i wish them luck 4th grade is tough!!

gwaine: must i pursue a career? is it not enough to be passionate about tv shows and snack foods?

leon, aroace: cool date idea: me eating oatmeal by myself

morgana: i have no self of steam

gwaine: i hate wearing a mask. i miss being able to gently kiss my trader joe’s cashier on the lips after they ring up my $8 box of blueberries

morgana: committing acts of violence today…*pushes morgause’s glass of water off the counter*

gwaine: mario will do anything to put a smile on your face

morgana: haha we get along so well...our brains just work the same way

morgause, after changing her entire personality to match morgana’s after analyzing the way she talks and texts: haha yeah it’s incredible

gwaine: covered in sauce, trembling

arthur: *says the vaguest most incoherent shit ever*

arthur: you know what i mean :/

[online]

morgana: *screenshots things her girlfriend said to her so she can read it again later* yeah i’m not gay

uther: dude no offence i don’t want to sound like an sjw or anything but if you have a girlfriend you’re straight. that’s just how it works

morgana: i’m a girl

uther: what the fuck

morgana: the second you say “family group chat” i know we are not the same

gwen: what if early in the morning after buying groceries we got caught in the rain and i used my jacket to cover your head ut we still got soaked and we made a fire at home and brewed tea and sat together watching the rain as our cats hid under our feets at each sound of thunder and we ate stew for dinner and watched tv until we fell asleep on the couch with your head resting on my shoulder

gwaine, to percival: hold my hand bro we’re crossing the street

percival: imageine if we all just started ignoring celebrities though

percival: i can’t stop thinking about how funny this would be. imagine kyie jenner posting a selfie and it gets 12 likes

morgana: this isn’t fun anymore i need a kiss

morgause at 1159 pm: life’s great lol

morgause at 1201 am: does anyone really know me? most importantly do i really know me? what if life doesn’t get better than this?

merlin: king i needbfjdjgnjfg qldkr snmsmdjgjt ….. .. i need--fjrjkrhgphpqn dd

arthur: huh *dunks merlin’s head back underwater*

morgana: i don’t go to therapy or take any pills i just rawdog life and let my brain turn into soup

mordred: dark emails

morgause: to whom it WILL concern

morgana: now that this email has found you

gwaine: hi waiter could i get the spaghetti i promise i’ll behave this time

merlin: the sexiest thing about me? everything hurts my feelings

gwaine: how is sex fun if i have to remove my crocs to have it

elyan: if he makes you remove your crocs for sex he isn’t the one

morgause: a motherfucker could use an embrace

morgana: every night after 10pm my feelings start crawling out, starved, as i beat them with a moderately large stick vigorously hissing “stay back” until i inevitably fall asleep

fanfiction: there’s only one room available…

morgause, who specifically chose a rated m and explicit story: oh my gosh there’s only one room they’re gonna share a bed what’s gonna happen next

morgana: i can have a little unrealistic romantic fantasy. as a treat

arthur: some of y’all weren’t asked out as a joke in middle school and it shows

morgana: how is everyone doing. i’ll go first i’m doing badly

morgana: being a kid was so fucking funny we’d just go around lying to each other’s faces constantly to impress each other one of the knights told me he was the first person to visit the sun and when i asked him what it was like to prove he was lying he said he didn’t remember because they sent him there when he was a baby and to this day the mental image of nasa launching an unsupervised baby into the sun still makes me crack up

elyan: do you wish you were seeing somebody

leon: a therapist

morgause: when you see someone from high school and they don’t recognize you that’s the exact opposite of the mortifying ordeal of being known. the gratifying relief of being forgotten

[texting]

morgana: you seem hard to kill

morgause: aw thank you

morgause: i haven’t been killed yet

morgana: to your knowledge

morgause: what

morgana: just truly bonkers how much i love lying down……..like being horizontal? Unparalleled

arthur: when i was younger i really thought that piranhas were going to be a bigger issue for me than they’ve turned out to be

morgause: filling out the depression and anxiety checkboxes at the doctors is always so sad but also very very funny

morgause: i am handed a piece of paper. i check off a box that says “every day i wish i were dead”. i hand back the paper. the paper and its contents are never again discussed.

morgana: unfortunately, due to several experiences in my youth, i cannot just “walk up and join the circle of people talking”, but it does sound lovely thank you

morgana: if california is so expensive why don’t you move to somewhere like ohio

morgause: full offense but i’d rather be dead in california than alive in ohio

morgause: ugly and uninspiring--review of ohio

morgana: staying up late not even fun anymore it’s just sad

morgause: everyone should be comfortable in their own skin :)

morgause’s brain: except for you

morgause: except for me :)

mithian: please peer pressure me into finishing projects

merlin: do it or you’re straight

mithian: i said peer pressure not threaten

morgause: the year is 2030. bakery art is so realistic, literally anything could be cake. the uncertainty has gripped the world in fear. i go to hug my wife for comfort. she is cake.

morgause: i sob in despair as i eat my cake wife. she is delicious

gwen: do ladies love stupid men or do they just love men who don’t exhaust every opportunity to feel smart

gwen: “i used to think that melancholy was a vegetable” that’s incredible, let’s hang out more

morgause: basically i accidentally listened to a song a few years ago and it led to this

morgana: *desperately tries to romanticise her homework*

uther: do i have to be pretty? is it not enough to simply be the loudest person in the room with the worst opinions

morgana: oh i can’t possibly study, i have allotted the next six hours to yearning vaguely

morgause: allow me to de-introduce myself

morgause: my name is [redacted]

arthur: i have no good posts today i’m sorry guys

merlin: haha “today”

mordred: “do we perhaps use magic because we were bullied and needed blah blah special interest blah blah” shut the FUCK up i use magic to see my anime husband’s big fucking honkers. sorry you got pantsed in front of your crush

morgana: i came here to bully people

mordred: is it because you got pantsed in front of your crush

morgana: no it’s because i’m deranged

mithian: pretty sure seven deadly sins is a bit excessive

mithian: just combine wrath and gluttony and make hangry

mithian: sloth and pride make Bottoming

morgana: despicable me ruined the word minion whenever i become a supervillain i’m just going to have to call them my homies or whatever

gwen: as a bisexual i am attracted to lanky boys with dark hair, girls who look like they could kill me, and anyone wearing vampire teeth

morgana: if someone tried to assassinate me that would make me feel so important and valued and beloved

gwaine: turn down for whom?

mithian: fact: usage of the word “the” has begun to decline. this is because as more and more people become educated, usage of the word “thoum’st” has become more common.

morgana, kidnapping mithian in 5x04: truth or dare? uhhh i dare you to………………………………..fall in love with me. haha i’m just joking bro………………..unless…………………………?

gwaine: my thoughts are like a clearance sale

gwaine: once it’s gone it’s gone

morgana: *pronounces “hors d’oeuvres” as “horse divorce” specifically to piss off morgause*

gwaine: do you prefer women or men?

leon: death

morgause: honestly no offense but i love falling asleep and sleeping. it’s like. ok goodnight

morgause: ngl it’s kinda difficult to be the moody and mysterious background character in everyone’s life when you’re quarantined at home

morgause: i need to get laid

morgause: --to rest. put me in a coffin, let my soul ascend

gwaine: it takes a lot of heart to be this stupid

gwaine: it takes real strength not to know shit about fuck

elyan: what’s your favorite anime?

leon: i’m a christian

arthur: just bought this tapeworm from etsy!

lancelot: where are you gonna keep it

arthur: :)

merlin: i don’t like this conversion very much

gwaine: i’m home alone with the tv repair man

gwaine: i’m no fool, there are only two possible outcomes of this scenario

gwaine: porn or murder

gwaine, an hour later: apparently there was an unforeseen third outcome where he fixes the tv and then leaves

morgause: well tomorrow fucking sucked

morgana: dark brunch

morgana: *mixes a mimosa with evil intent*

morgause: this is just what being gay is like

gwaine: movie idea: guy finds a stone tablet engraved with a mysterious alien language and gets caught up in a national treasure-esque adventure to decipher its meaning, only to learn that it’s just an alien “live laugh love” decoration

arthur: sorry i didn’t mean to open your ig story 20 seconds after you posted i’m just unemployed

arthur: why do you say men are objects? that’s not true and hurtful

morgana: men are on sale at the grocery store for a few dollars

cenred: why do you say men are objects? that’s not true and hurtful

morgause: men are on sale at the grocery store for a few dollars

morgana: wow would you look at that. it’s already that time of the night where i move the stuff on my bed to my chair. can’t wait until tomorrow when i move the stuff from my chair back onto my bed

gwaine: hi i’m bethany with girl defined ministry and today we are going to be talking about how to stan my chemical romance in a God-honoring way

morgana: bottom: ,,, !!! ;;; vers: …. top: no punctuation whatsoever

morgause: tops are illiterate

morgause: i slept for almost 12 hours but i might still be tired so let’s go for 12 more just in case

morgana: morgause that’s a coma

morgause: sounds festive

mithian: i am a simple woman. i enter the kitchen. i eat four servings of bread products. i leave.

gwaine: it’s one serving if you serve all of it to yourself

mithian: i like the way you think, friend

gwaine: spencer from icarly and rodrick from diary of a wimpy kid are on the opposite ends of the same spectrum

elyan: the gay older brother scale

merlin: i found a rock :)

merlin: my troubles will soon be over

gwaine: parasite (2019) dir. bong joon ho

percival: uncut gems (2019) dir. josh and benny safdie

elyan: cain

morgana: social distancing is okay for me bc i’ve been touch starved since the 15th century. i’m used to it

mithian: fanfiction hits different when you’re gay and yearning and haven’t experienced an ounce of romance in your life

morgause: callout for rude baby seen at grocery store

morgause: i’m calling out a baby (approximately 12-14 months old) from the grocery store due to its rudeness. i’m guessing its age based on appearance, motor skills (atrocious) and whatnot. anyway, i smiled at this baby and it just stared at me. as soon as i began to move on, though, the baby said “no!” and started giggling when i turned back around. this happened multiple times. the baby’s actions were toxic and manipulative. the baby was also manhandling a package of dried fruit which wasn’t yet paid for (quite minor) and was just generally sitting around and not helping

gwen: we need to melt down all the pennies and make the statue of liberty a girlfriend

morgause: had a realization in a dream i just had that this isn’t real and i can just do whatever i want and so i started shrinking the face of this guy that was talking to me and then once it got real small i woke up sleep paralyzed

morgause: i was given godlike powers over the universe by realizing it’s all in my head and the first thing i did was use them to torment the nearest man

morgause: and the actual God woke me up and put be into a 5 minute timeout to lay frozen and think about what i’ve done

morgana: does anyone else feel an awkward tension whenever you see another person your age in the grocery store

gwaine: the number 87 kinda looks like a plague doctor

percival: you’ve just changed the fucking game

elyan: [|87

morgana: a lonely bitch...a loner...i love isolation AND detachment

gwaine: i will not call the judges “your honor”. in america we don’t have titles of nobility. they will get a simple “yes dude” from me

gwaine: calling big bird just “bird” because i do not respect him

morgause: *photo of a pizza in a bad* caught the bae sleepin

mordred: now why would you waste a perfectly good pizza :(

morgause: that “waste” happens to be my wife getting her beauty sleep. think before you speak

gwaine: *finishes wedding vows* don’t forget to like and subscribe

morgana: *is bitter but is also right*

morgana: how dare you not notice me when i’m ignoring you

morgause, killing cenred: men be like i’m bilingual i speak english and over women

gwaine: after i move i really wanna get a used roomba

percival: i love that you’re adopting instead of buying from a breeder

mordred: joking about a kink is a gateway drug into developing said kink

morgana: my kink is mental, emotional, and financial stability

morgause: unrealistic, settle for choking like normal people

gaius: gay people use halloween props as home decor year round

morgana: shut up shut up this black jar with a raven painted on it is holiday-neutral

[texting]

morgause: can you come out?

morgana: yeah gimme a minute

morgana: morgause, i’m gay

morgause: i know that. come out to the car

morgana: car, i’m gay

morgause: God FUCKING damnit i’m such a hopeless romantic one day someone’s gonna say “i love you” and i’m just going to let out an agonized scream so horrible that they immediately change their mind

gaius: i’m not wearing glasses anymore i’ve seen enough

morgause: sorry my battery’s on 96% i gtg

morgause: you hate me? wow you think you’re hot shit and original huh well i hated me first so you can go grab a number and wait your turn

morgana: don’t ignore me ?? i despise being ignored ?? i mean i’m ignoring like 8 people right now but still ???

morgana: shoutout to my favorite coping mechanism, isolation

morgana: the concept of physical beauty is a scam unless you’re calling me cute in which case it is valid, actually

merlin: oh, so when other people go outside it’s “good for their health” and “highly recommended”, it’s only when i do it that it’s a “containment breach” and a “high-level threat to public safety and security”, huh?

gwaine: a charming photo of young john mulaney, seemingly celebrating the kennedy assassination

merlin: princess diana wasn’t john mulaney’s first kill

morgause: hate when i got out in public and the public is there

morgana: it seems the public is no longer in the public

morgause: i’ve won...but at what cost?

morgana: girls will see a chance to commit arson and be like “sorry, i have to take this”

morgause: girls will see a building that’s not on fire and say “is anyone gonna burn that” and not wait for an answer

#puff does things #long post

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snazzy-suit · 4 years

Note

Ok so, what would King Boo's reaction be to Mario and the Music Box? Both the game and if it(tried) happened in real life or started too?

King Boo: “Music…box? Why in Star’s name would I care about a music box owned by Mario? It’s probably ugly and sounds terrible—just like him.”

Boo: “It’s the title of a horror game, your majesty. One that stars Mario and Luigi exploring a haunted mansion. The decisions you make affect the ending and determine whether they live or die.”

King Boo: “Sounds delightful! Is it one of my mansions, and am I the one doing the killing?”

Boo: “No and…technically no? It’s a bunch of human ghosts—"

King Boo: “I have immediately lost interest.”

I had to look this up because I had never heard of this game before. 😅 I watched some LPs of it, and based on what I saw, I don’t think King Boo would care for it. The concept amuses him, but the fact it’s not King Boo himself terrorizing the brothers annoys him greatly.

If the events of the game tried to become a reality, he would shoot that shit down right quick. The brothers would be snatched up and dragged away before they even got through the front door.

King Boo, scruffing Mario and Luigi like misbehaving kittens: “You brothers really have no sense of self-preservation, do you? Normally I adore that trait, but right now it’s incredibly annoying.”

Mario, angrily, struggling to get free: “How did you even know we were here?!”

King Boo: “I’m the king of Boos. Do you honestly believe I don’t keep tabs on places like this? If you’re so eager to perish, I’ll happily construct a nightmare realm for you to trapeze through later, but right now we’re leaving.”

Luigi, very poorly hiding his relief: “Oh nooo, now we’ll never solve the mysteryyy.”

#Mario #King Boo #Luigi #this is all hypothetical of course #the game doesn't exist in this au #nor does this incident #it's just not my cup of tea #and Luigi heartily agrees #Mario please stop running off to spooky mansions by yourself #really you shouldn't go at all #LLoG AU #LLoG Asks #King Boo Asks #suit speaks

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blackhakumen · 4 years

Text

Mini Fanfic #339: Luigi's (and Friends') Reaction to his Appearance on Death Battle (Super Smash Bros Ultimate)

Luigi gets killed by Tails on screen

Dedede: (Completely Shocked) DAYUUUUUUUUUM!!!!!

Isabelle: (Covered her mouth in Complete Shock) Oh my......

Wolf: Jesus......

Richter: (Eyes Widened) My God.....

Cloud: (Speechless)

Luigi: Wow.

Everyone Turn to Luigi, who's acting completely normal from all of this.

Luigi: What?

Dedede: "Wow". That's all you got to say....after seeing yourself get killed on DEATH BATTLE?!

Luigi: (Taken Aback by Dedede's Sudden Outburst) W-Well Yeah. I mean....You guys do know this is was all Fan-Maded Series, right?

Richter: (Frowns a Little) Yeah. But still..... Doesn't it bother you at least little?

Luigi: (Shrugged) Not really? I mean, I am a little sad that I lose, but I'm also happy Tails won the fight too. And besides, it like what I said before. This is all a Fan-Base series. I really doubt that the both of us would fight to the death in real life, right?

Richter: That is....very much true. (Chuckles Lightly) We really overreacted around this, haven't we?

Luigi: (Shrugged with a Smile Softly) Probably. But I think I get where you guys are coming. Thanks for worrying about me.

Isabelle: (Hugs Luigi Worryingly and Happyily) You're very welcome, Luigi. We're only like this because we love you.

Dedede: (Smiles Proudly while Patting Luigi on the back) I said once and I'll say this again. You're Loved and Appreciated, boy.

Wolf: You know something, Luigi? I didn't really care about you at first.....(Smiling a Little) After getting to know you more thanks to my Izzy here....

Isabelle: (Giggles Softly by Wolf's nickname for her)

Wolf: .......I for one think you're pretty alright.

Luigi: (Smiles Softly) Thanks, you guys. I love all of you too.

Cloud: Let's just hope Daisy doesn't see this-

*Cellphone Rang*

Cloud: (Picks up his phone) Hello?... What's up, Tifa?........Wait....... Seriously?........('Sigh') Alright. I'll get him to go outside.......Love you too.... Bye.

*Call Ends*

Luigi: Who was it, Cloud?

Cloud: (Turns to Luigi with a Somewhat Serious Look on His Face) Luigi, you need to go outside and fast.

Luigi: (Confused but Worried at the same time) W-Why? What's going on?

Cloud: I don't wanna go to any details but.... Let's just say that I really shouldn't spoke too soon.

Isabelle: ('Gasps') You don't mean-

Cloud: Yep.

Outside of the Smash Mansion......

Luigi: (Walks out of the Smash Mansion) Alright. What's going-Ahh (Gets Hugged Tightly by Daisy) Wait....Daisy?

Daisy: (Looking at Luigi with Tears in her eyes)

Luigi: (Noticed Samus and Tifa making their way towards the couple) You guys, what happened? Why Daisy's crying?

Samus: (Frown a Little) Luigi, remember that episode of Death Battle between you and Tails?

Luigi: Yeah. We were just watching that- Oh my God....You don't mean-

Samus: Yep....We saw it too while we were in the gym. Daisy here didn't take it well.

Daisy: It's Truuue!....(Cries Softly into Luigi's Embrace)

Luigi: (Heart Actually Felt Broken to see Daisy Crying in Luigi's arms like this) Oh Daisy......

Tifa: (Frowns a little as she and Samus made their way to the door) We'll leave you two alone for awhile.

Samus: Oh and Luigi?

Luigi: Yeah?

Samus: (Turns to Luigi) You're a great person.

Tifa: (Smiles A Little Sadly) We're so glad we're friends with you.

Luigi: Oh! Umm....Thanks. I'm glad you all are my friends too.

Samus and Tifa Smiles Softly as they got inside and close the door behind them.

Luigi: (Turns back to a Daisy still hugging him) Daisy, are you going to be okay?

Daisy: Yeah.....('Sniff') I will be.....('Sniff') Sorry for overreacting, sweetie.....

Luigi: (Smiles a Little) It's okay, Daisy. I'm just glad you're calming down now. That Death Battle was pretty hectic, huh?

Daisy: Tell me about it. ('Sniff') I know it's just a show and all, but.....It almost felt real, you know? Seeing you get killed and what not......

Luigi: Don't worry, Daisy. I won't go anywhere anytime soon. (Kiss the top of Daisy's Forehead) I promise.

Daisy: (Smiles Softly with a bit of tears in her eyes) I know, babe. I love you~

Luigi: (Smiles Softly) I love you too, Daisy~

Bonus

Luigi: Wait. So if you saw the Death Battle and that it shocked you, does that mean you hate Tails now?

Daisy: (Surprised by Luigi's Question) What? Of course not, Weegie! I could never hate cute Lil' Tails. He's our nephew, remember?

Luigi: Ohhh....Right.....I forgot Bro and Peach adopted him a while back.

@luigifan00001

@keyenuta

@26shann

@cyber-wildcat

@chompycroc

@scribblehooves

@ink-correctsmashbrosbloo

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aman58 · 4 years

Text

Morty: (sobbing on his director seat immediately) UWAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA!

Morty: (wails even harder tears hit his little bro umbrella as the tears cleared up) M M MY M M MEG MEGAPHONE UHAHAHAHHAHAAHA! (Blows his nose by a tissue melts/morphs into a bucket as the tissue fell in it causing Morty to inflate then he returned to normal) T THANKS BUT IT ZE NO USE I AM NOW WHAT YOU SAY? WASHED OUT!

Morty: ZHE TRAGEDY OH HO HO HO IS ZHIS MY END IS ZHIS I MORTY DIRECTOR OF IT FINATS FILMS HOW COULD I LOSE IT? I AM A PUNY WORTHLESS MOVIE DIRECTOR ZHAT ALL EVEN ZHE GLOW FROM ZHIS BEAUTIFUL BUTTON IS NOW NOTHING BUT A DULL HUES AHHHHHHH MY BRIGHT RED MEGAPHONE WHERE ART THOU?! I WOULD GIVE ANYTHING TO BE ABLE TO HOLD MY DEAR SWEET MEGAPHONE AGAIN DO NOT LOOK AT ME I AM NOW WHAT YOU SAY HIDEOUS! (Morphs into a poorly drawn version of himself) MY ART OHHH HOW MY ART STUFFERS DO NOT SLANDER ME DIRECTOR WITHOUT APPLYING IT TO MOI ME WITHOUT MY MEGAPHONE I AM UNWORTHY OF BEING CALLED SUCH A NAME! (Turns into a sad clown toots his horn gloomy turns into a artist with a blank canvas without a brush or paint turns into a chef without a knife to cut his food morphs into a moping dog without a bag of trash to dig/eat out of) WHAT AN ARTIST WITHOUT A BRUSH HUH? A CHEF WITHOUT A KNIFE A DOG WITHOUT A BAG OF ZRASH? (Shapeshift to himself on paper being stomped on by the word rejected) NOTHING WITHOUT MY MEGAPHONE I AM NOTHING TOO NO I AM LESS ZHAN NOTHING! (Turns back to normal puts hand on face and sobs some more)

Morty: (gasps happily) HAHA! MY MEGAPHONE! ZHANK YOU VERY MUCH AH HAHAHA! (hugging it pauses looks at grabs them both) YOU TWO DEUX WAIT A SECOND HOLD IT RIGHT THERE I DID NOT NOTICE UNTIL NOW BUT YOU BOTH HAVE SOME EXCELLENT FEATURES AND YOUR BUILDS NOT BAD NOT BAD AT ALL (makes pictures poses with his fingers) AHH YES I SEE A MAKING OF A STAR YES MY CREATIVE MIND IS SHAKING OFF ZHE DUST AND IS SPRINGING BACK TO LIFE! (Puts his arms around the two) AHA I CAN SEE IT NOW WILL GO AGAINST THE RAMPAGING KAIJU GHOST AND IT ALL ENDS WITH A KISS SCENE

Morty: WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING PUNK?!

Morty: (as a police officer) OH HO HO HO TASK TASK I AM AFRAID I AM GOING TO HAVE TO GIVE YOU A TICKET FOR LEAVING THE FILM AND THAT INCLUDING ROMANES

Another Morty: (as George floyed) OK TELL ME WHAT IS ON YOUR MIND RIGHT NOW?

Yet another Morty: (as a medical doctor) OK NOW SAY AHHH

Yet another Morty: OK IT TIME FOR THE OLD TICKER COUGH PLEASE

Yet another Morty: WHAT THIS WELL (x rays) OH WOW HEART BEATING AS TWOMP SWEATS COMING DOWN YOUR FACE I GUESS YOU HAVE A BAD CASE OF LOVESICKNESS (song song) AND I DO NOT MEAN TO BOTHER BUT YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH THAT WOMAN IS IT (nudged him)

Morty: (snaps his decoys away and snaps back to his French accent) AHA! THERE IS MY STAR COME AND TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL RATHER THAN SHOWING IT I KNOW YOU WILL MAKE YOUR BROTHER MARIO POUD WHAT DO SAY MY FRIEND I AM NOT JUST MAKING THESE MOVIES FOR EVERYONE TO ENJOY THIS MOVIE IN PARTICULAR I WANT DJ PHANTASMAGORIA TO SEE OH HA OH! (Smithers in thoughts)

Morty: DJ PHANTASMAGORIA RESIDES ON ZHE 14th FLOOR OF THE HOTEL SHE IS A GREAT MUSICIAN RIGHT NEXT TO AMADEUS GLORIA IS MY MUSE (turns into multi violins as heart shaped notes fly off the strings) SHE HAS BEEN AMAZING THOUGH A ZHOUSAND OF VIOLINS (sighs shows a CD remix that pg has given him) SHE GAVE ME THIS TO KEEP TRACK WITH MY FILMS SHE ALSO HELPS ME WITH MY FILMS IN WITCH SHE COMPOSED AND REMIXED FOR ME BUT ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

Morty: COME COME LETS START SHOOTING WHERE MY CREW PLACES EVERYONE TAKE YOUR PLACES AND ACTION! GREAT GREAT KEEP IT KEEP IT UP EXCELLENT WORK YOU TWO MY GUTS TELLS ME ZHIS GOING TO BE A MASTERPIECE TIME TO ACTIVATE STARDOM!

Morty: NOW ZHIS OHHH ZHIS IS ART CUE KISS SCENE

Morty: AND CUT! HEY!

Morty: HERE IS YOUR EMMY AS PROMISED (gives the ninth elevator button)

Morty: NOW I AM GOING TO EDIT ZHIS MWAH BEAUTIFUL MASTERPIECE YOU HELP CREATE!

Morty: WHAT ZHE EVIL WHOA HA HO! HELP ME! (His tail sudden gets stuck in the rolling film tape as electric sparks starts flying as a blast of static sends steward flying towards the wall as he shook it off)

(FLEE STACH BOOM!)

Morty: AHHHH RAHHHHH (the shadow on the wall detects him turning into a KAJIU turns into mortilza) MORTILZA IS ZE MORE LIKE IT (looks at live cam places on his head) RWAH COME IT STEMS ZHAT WE SHOULD GO AND HELP THEM OUT

Mortilza: ZHIS IS NO TIME TO MANGLE WITH US GHOST WITH ZHE MOST HERE OK I AM THE READY FOR BASHER KITTY COMBET

Mortilza: (nabs the evil cat by the tails and swings her by the tv feels ozzy reverts to normal) OHHHH (shakes head) QUICKLY EVERYONE HOLD HANDS WE ARE GOING LIVE!

Morty: ZHAT IS BECAUSE WE ARE IN ZHE FILM I MADE IT NOW (as a blue version of darkwing duck) LET'S GET DANGEROUS! (They chased after the cat along the way the poor Director was zapped and injured as his friends were trying their best to save him from dying)

(SKEE THUD!)

Morty: WAIT I HAVE GOT A MOTION TO STOP ZHAT PESKY CAT! (Turns into a mouse) COME ON FOLLOW ME INTO THIS LITTLE MOUSY HOLE THAT IS MOI (goes into the hole with the cat following him ) NOW FELLAS CREM HER!

Morty: I WILL STAY PUT HERE WITH MY STAGE CREW AND I WILL LET YOU KNOW WHEN ZHE FILM IS READY TO VIEW HA HA!

Morty: MY FILM IS FINALLY COMPLETE

Morty: WHAT! ZHE 14TH FLOOR (morphs into a GameCube) I AM GAME!

Morty: WHERE IS DJ PHANTASMAGORIA? (Starts shaking but stops him) ZHANKS

DJ Phantasmagloria: WHO IS THAT COMING ON MY DANCE FLOOR?

Morty: (crazy French babbling feeling all lovestruck as he melts and turns into a flower and then reverts to normal) H HI PG ZHANKS FOR THAT CD YOU GAVE ME!!!

Morty: oh yes just give moi a second (rushes out of the dance floor)

DJ Phantasmagoria: WHAT CD?

Morty: HEE HEE ZHIS ONE! (Shows pg the cd) ZHIS ONE!

Morty: NO NO SNAP OUT OF IT STOP (morphs into one of the groobs dancers) TAKE ZHIS OHHH

Morty: (crying) O O OH PLEASE PHANTASMAGORIA PLEASE FALL IN LOVE WITH ME!

Morty: (looks at the films) HEY WAIT I HAVE AN IDEA! (Puts film up) WATCH THIS!

Morty: HAHA I FINALLY DID IT! (hops on DJ Phantasmagloria lap as he smiles) I LOVE YOU SWEETHEART!

DJ Phantasmagloria: (gasps) OH MORTY I AM SO SORRY I ACTED SO BADLY IN FACT I AM ABOUT TO SING A SONG WANT TO HEAR IT?

Morty: (gasps melts on pg lap but reverts to normal) SORRY I MEAN YES!

Morty: (bawls) Z ZHAT W WAS B BEAUTIFUL (blows his nose) ZHANKS FOR EVERYTHING!

Morty: YEAH BYE!

They group left with pg following them as they went through many pages of the Luigi Mansion 3 levels

The end

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szopenhauer · 4 years

Text

What was your last dream about? pamiętam tylko tyle, że M. powinna uważać na jej byłego

Would you like to build/design your own house? yes

Do you have a cherished childhood teddy bear? it’s not really a teddy but yeah

Are you psychic in any way? it seems

Are you a good dancer? meh

Are you a good singer? nooo

Are you a good cook? not the worst

Are you a good artist? maybe

Are you a good listener? try to be

Are you a good public speaker? but don’t like to

Are you a good babysitter? might be but hate that

Are you a good dresser? have my own style

Are you a good comedian? I’m funny :P

Are you a good cleaner? not good enough

Are you a good actor? I am

Are you a good writer? just like to write

Do you ever get chills & goosebumps when you listen to music? tell me about it...

What was the last song that had that effect on you? not sure which was last

Do you know what any of your siblings did over the weekend? I don’t care

Was the last book you read a hardback or paperback? paperback

What was the last thing you required the use of a spoon for? I was eating breakfast

The last time you ate something, was it in a bowl or on a plate? neither XD

Can you recall the last time you held hands with someone? I can

What was the last thing that made your heart melt? hmm...

Can you recall the last time you visited a bookshop? not the exact day but yep

Did you purchase anything? I don’t think so

Have you been wearing homemade masks or store-bought ones? both

Do you call yourself stupid a lot? sometimes

Are you listening to music right now? not rn

What is your newest favorite website? aliexpress?

Do you have a headache right now? had before today

What month is your birthday, and what month would u change it to if you could? February and would like June, July or August that’s why I will spend my name day during summer instead of spring with my sister

Have you ever had to use an epi pen? not yet

Do you know the names of 3 of your neighbors? (list if you can): personal

What was the last grocery store you shopped at?

Do memories from your past come back to haunt you ? frequently

Have you ever seen an angel? or a ghost

Have you ever seen a demon? that time in a mirror?...

What color was the last sweatshirt you wore? grey

What was the last act of creativity you displayed? Vinnie’s tiny bird next to her signature?

Do you ever find yourself just writing/typing out your feelings? my tumblr is full of this shit

Whose house were you at last, besides your own? my current partner’s

Do you like your teeth? not really

Does piano music tend to calm you down? wouldn’t say so

What’s something you need to get done soon? ugh...

Is your best friend awake right now? they are

If I came to your house, could I find any kind of chocolate? ask my mother

Who was the last person to upload a picture with you in it? M.

Do you ever wear sleep masks when you sleep or shower caps when you shower? neither

Don’t tell me lies, so where’s your man? where’s Nat? XD

Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex? dad

Has anyone said they love you in the last week? yasss

Have you ever kissed under water? hell no

Have you kissed anyone whose name starts with a M? hahaha

Would you kiss the last person who texted you, on the lips? done and I hopefully will

Camping with a ton of friends or hotel with a few friends? hotel

Could you go the rest of your life without a cigarette? absolutely

Have you ever wanted something you couldn’t have? like health

How is your boyfriend/girlfriend doing and where are they now? she’s angry, has a flu and she’s working

What was the last topic you read about? DID?

Do you prefer Windows or Mac? Windows

What’s the best amusement park ride you’ve ever been on? I’m not a fan of rides tbh

Would you know how to read a house blueprint? partially?

Do you keep notes on your phone? What sort of things do you write? used to on my old cell

Do you remember much from high school? tought so

Has anyone ever come out to you? yup

What was the last album you listened to in full? Red army choir or Anastasis?

Do you have Disney+? we don’t

Have you ever sent a package or letter to a foreign country? postcards

How many jobs do you have on your resume? 0

Are you comfortable with leaving the house without any makeup on?: I don’t wear makeup

Do you have any expensive hobbies?: if I had money...

What length do you like to keep your nails at?: short

Have you ever felt physical pain in a dream?: but not as much as Nat

Have you ever had Christmas carolers come to your house and sing for you?: when I was a kid

What’s your favorite Studio Ghibli film?: Porco Rosso?

What did you learn from your last failed relationship?: can we not talk about it...

What’s something on your to-do list that never actually gets done?: I’m a huge procrastinator

Have you ever been really passionate about something but then lost interest? If so, what was it?: collages

What’s the worst thing about being male/female (whichever you are)?: period, being able to get pregnant and have female kinds of cancer etc.

What movie has the best special effects?: I’m into practical special effects more than cgi but... there’s too many to name

When did you last have a vision test?: ages ago

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