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#her? she doesnt fucking deserve it. if i just had basic self con-fucking-trol we wouldn't even be In this mess in the first place
3knecrotic
·
11 months
Text
I. Am so. Fucking. Conflicted.
#dk speaks
#vent
#im so full of fucking rage
#this pure boiling fucking anger
#with Nothing to direct it to.
#me? been there done that got the Junkie Ass Carving
#her? she doesnt fucking deserve it. if i just had basic self con-fucking-trol we wouldn't even be In this mess in the first place
#i am a god damn timebomb and i have No clue when or who I'll explode on.
#at least when im high or drunk or on Anything that rage subsides.
#no anger. no ticking. just pleasantries and sociability and joy and calm.
#but when im sober? god forbid if i am Forced to be sober?
#pft. i can't wait to see the God damn fireworks
#because hopefully then it'll mean I've hurt everyone who could Ever care for me
#or I've gone so far i pull a trigger before I can even Conceive the trauma I'll cause.
#either way. i hurt.
#if i get high the way i like to. i hurt.
#if i stay sober for too long and get back to my regularly scheduled Thoughts. I Hurt.
#there's pain either way.
#fact of the matter is who am i gonna force to get it.
#me.
#or all.
#let's find the fuck out.
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