#gonna be addressing a few of the older asks sitting in my inbox!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thiswasinevitableid · 3 years

Note

29 for indruck nsfw? i am already amused thinking about what sport either of them would play

Here you go!

29. I’m a professional athlete and I just fired my personal assistant and my manager sent you over but you don’t even know what sport I play or who my team is

When you’re in an aggressive profession it’s best, in Duck’s experience, to be as calm and friendly as you can the rest of the time.

But this whole shit-show is testing his fucking limits.

It’s been two days since he found out his perfectly fine P.A was working for the Wallstreet Journal, hoping to learn that Duck was somehow using his T or his identity to gain an unfair edge in matched. Ned fired him on the spot, thank god, but it took less than twelve hours for the guy to publish some fabricated piece on his attitude and for Duck to remember why he needed an assistant in the first place. He’s gotten so used to having one that he keeps forgetting stuff or dropping the ball on appointments, and the last thing he needs right now is to look like some stupid hick.

When Ned texts him to let him know his new P.A is en route, Duck groans “thank fuck” loud enough to startle the cat from her tree.

He goes to the door when someone knocks, but doesn’t open it.

“Who is it?”

“Indrid Cold? I, ah, Mr. Chicane said this was Duck Newton’s address and I’m supposed to start as his assistant tomorrow.”

Duck opens the door, “Fuck tomorrow, you’re startin today. I gotta focus on strategy with Minerva the next two days if I don’t wanna show my ass Friday night and it’s real fuckin hard to do that with people callin me left and right.” He guides the startled young man inside, then stops to take a deep breath, “sorry, lemme try that again” he holds out his hand, “Nice to meet you, Indrid.”

“Likewise, Mr. Newton.”

“Duck is fine. It’s a nickname. You bring your stuff with you?”

“Yes, it’s all in my car.”

“Good. Here, lemme give you the, uh, the grand tour, so to speak, on the way to your part of the place.”

Indrid smiles and nods, hanging back slightly as Duck leads him through the house. They cover the living room, kitchen, Duck’s bedroom, then come what was once the garage door.

“This here’s the gym; you can’t find me in the rest of the house, I’m probably here.”

“Goodness” The other man’s eyes widen behind his red glasses, “that’s an impressive array. I mean, I know professional athletes need to train but I, ah, I assumed you did it on site with the rest of your team.”

“Team?” Duck closes the door, spots Indrid’s fingers diving into his pockets to hide their twitching.

“Yes.”

“Which team?”

“Your...sports team?”

“....you got no fuckin clue who I am, do you?”

“No.” Narrow shoulders sag in his sweater.

Duck chuckles, “Figures.”

The silver haired head snaps back up, “Mr. Chicane didn’t say it was a prerequisite for hiring me.”

“Guess he didn’t. And I guess it ain’t. Just hoped they’d hire someone who knew what the fuck he was gettin into.”

Indrid crosses his arms, “They gave me a very thorough job description. I assure you I can do every part of it. Laying out your pre-workout and scheduling appearances isn’t rocket science, and it doesn’t matter if the dry cleaning I pick up is for a, a baseball after party or some sort of charity basketball fundraiser.” It dawns on the taller man that he’s just snapped at his boss. He contracts in on himself, staring down at his black converse.

Duck takes the chance for a more careful look; all of his clothes are second hand, chosen as if he’s cosplaying a jock who went into white collar work. There are piercing holes in his ears, flecks of silver polish on his nails. This job application was a hail mary and Ned Chicane went ahead and caught.

“No harm done, slim.” He rests a friendly hand on Indrid’s arm, “think it’s time I enlightened you.”

His office doesn’t get used much, so a sprinkling of dust greets them as he flips on the lights and reveals posters, magazine covers, and newspaper clips bearing Duck’s face. The gloves he used to win his first fight hang in a place of honor, right above the photo of him and the other fighters from Amnesty Boxing. It’s an older photo, taken the first time they sent a team out of state, sun-faded to the point the writing on it is disappearing. It makes him smile all the same.

“This does explain the set of instructions for helping you cut weight if needed.” Indrid takes in the posters, then turns his attention to the corner dedicated to Duck’s model ship collection. He cocks his head, says more to himself than Duck, “boxer. Interesting.”

“Were you just gonna bluff about knowin who I was until I said somethin?”

“That and look for clues in the rest of the house.”

He smiles, “Like a man with a plan b. C’mon, lemme show you your room.”

-----------------------------------------

Alright, so Indrid should have researched Duck Newton before turning up at his house so he didn’t come across as ignorant and unprepared. But he was busy running every Taskrabbit and UberEat he could get just to scrape up enough to keep his landlord off his back. Sue him for not wanting to sleep in his car again.

He never expected to get this job; live-in P.A who doesn’t have to pay for groceries (buy them, yes, since that��s one of his jobs) is not the kind of luck he’s familiar with. He keeps waiting for the catch, so nervous that when Duck pops in on him unpacking he assumes he’ll scold him for his wardrobe.

“I, should I buy some more professional clothes?”

Duck takes in the two duffle bags and backpack, “Up to you. I don’t mind you lookin like the little art punk you are, but a dress shirt or two might help if we gotta go somewhere real upscale. Don't worry about buyin it yourself; just use the same card we do for groceries.”

Indrid is still hung up on why the fact a man three inches shorter than him calling him “little” makes his chest burn. Luckily, the phone rings and distracts him. Then it rings again. And again. And again. All while the inbox doubles every time he looks at it.

This turns out to be the catch; the work is actually hard. Everyone and their uncle wants to interview Duck, get him to sponsor something, or proposition him. Four hours in, he’s overwhelmed, overstimulated, and ready to hide under the desk. His fidget necklace isn’t helping, so he pulls out his chewable one; it often helps him think in high pressure moments.

The phone rings again and he growls at it.

“You’re allowed to let things go to voicemail, y’know.”

He spins in his chair, black rubber moth still in his mouth. Duck leans in the doorway, tank top soaked in sweat and towel around his shoulders

“I, I’m sorry. I just don’t want to drop anything important.”

“Ned handles the fights and the money, and anyone I care about has my private number for emergencies.”

“Right. I knew that.” Indrid can’t have his boss thinking he’s a total space-case.

Duck smiles, “What I’m sayin is; ain’t the end of the world if you don’t get back to everyone right away. Besides, right now you need a lunch break, slim. Lemme go rinse off and I’ll join you.”

By the time Duck enters the kitchen in an old “NIN” shirt and jeans, Indrid has his protein bowl laid out for him and is finishing microwaving a hot pocket for himself. Before he can scurry away, Duck pats the seat beside him and Indrid sits down, preparin to politely listen to Duck talk about himself or his sport.

He talks for ten minutes about the trees he saw on his run that morning before asking Indrid what he did before coming to the house. Indrid explains about his art and his side hustles in tarot and palm reading, about the run of bad luck that saw him without roommates and lost him his steady gig at a coffee shop. Duck makes genuinely sympathetic noises, lets Indrid change the subject when the fact he was on the edge of disaster makes Indrid’s chest tighten. They’re still talking about music as Indrid returns to his desk and Duck goes to meet Minerva in the gym.

By the time Duck’s fight rolls around that weekend, Indrid is feeling much better. He has a system of sorting emails that works for him, some mothman stickers to help him organize the paper calendar on his desk, and more confidence in his ability to spot callers with ulterior motives. He’s shut down two separate ones looking to trap Duck into interviews where he’d be forced to defend his very identity. Duck overheard his responses to the second one and brought him back a fancy creme brulee latte from his breakfast as a thank you.

He doesn’t go to the fight; it’s a small one for charity and Duck has Ned to manage him, Minerva to train him, and Leo to coach him ringside. He doesn’t need his P.A. Instead, Indrid finishes up his correspondence for the day, makes sure Duck’s breakfast is all set in the fridge, and confirms the masseuse is coming in the morning.

Once in bed, Indrid gets sucked into the commission he’s doing and is lost to the world until a tired, satisfied face pokes through his door.

“Oh! Hello Duck. Did it go well? Do, ah, is there something you need from me?”

“Yep, I won like I thought I would. And nope; was just poppin in to say goodnight.”

No one’s said that to him in a long time. The bitterness of that realization is sweetened by Duck’s smile.

“Goodnight to you too, Duck.”

------------------------------------------

Minerva is sick, which wouldn’t be a problem except for one part of his workout. He could skip it, but he needs to keep everything sharp for when they go to L.A.

“‘Drid? You got a few minutes?”

His assistant appears in the doorway, black jeans and white “Cramps” tank-top fitting him in a way that makes Duck want to hold him face down on the floor and find out how to take his breath away.

“What do you need?”

Duck points to the heavy bag, “You up for bracin this while I hit it?”

“I...I am not as strong as Minerva.”

“You don’t gotta be; this is just to keep the damn thing from swinging while I’m doin this speed drill.”

“Alright.” Indrid takes off his glasses and sets them on the folding chair, joining Duck, “how do I hold it?”

Duck shows him, does a few test punches to make sure he won’t send the poor guy flying. The round clock dings green, and he’s off. The bag wobbles for the first few seconds, then Indrid seems to find his footing and holds it stable enough for the drill to work. When the round ends, Duck steps baack, “okay, you can let go until the next round.”

“Goodness.” Indrid stretches his hands, “I feel for your opponents. I’m jarred just from that.”

“You need to stop? I got two more rounds at least, but if it’s hurtin you I caan skip ‘em.”

Indrid shakes his head, smiling, “nono, I like helping you with this. It’s exhilarating.”

The bell dings.

“Glad to hear it. Now brace it again.”

By the end of round three, Indrid is panting loud enough for Duck to hear him over the fan. He looks up, glove still on the bag, and finds them face to face.

“Minerva said three to five rounds for this. You wanna keep goin?”

Indrid, breathless and grinning, nods, “Can’t have you slacking off, now can we?”

Duck wants to bite his lip, just to see what happens. Blames the thought on the adrenaline. Then discovers the exact same thought waiting for him when Indrid, cleaned and in his most respectable clothes, joins him in the car to go to an interview.

Ned gave the P.A a list of likely questions, so they practice those as they creep across the Bay Bridge. But Duck notices that on both the trip there and back, whenever there’s a lull in conversation Indrid is on his phone reading about boxing. Duck knows the other man fixates on topics that interest him; knowing one of Duck’s passions has earned that distinction makes him smile.

After that, he starts inviting Indrid to watch him train, or shares his thoughts about matches with him. That’s all it takes for Indrid to start drawing him into long, animated conversations about his sport. When Indrid asks why there’s such debate over the proper way to wrap hands and also how does Duck do his, Duck demonstrates.

“Here, ‘Drid, now you try it on me.”

The P.A moves the wraps slowly, deliberately, moving Duck’s hand like it’s a priceless treasure he’s readying for transport. Every time he bites his lip in concentration or brushes hair from his forehead, Duck has to remind himself to breathe.

“Done.” Indrid is still holding his left hand, “Did I do well?”

The boxer tests the wraps, wiggles his fingers and clenches his fists. Then he squeezes Indrid’s hand, “you did perfect, slim.”

Duck can wrap his hands in his sleep. But whenever he’s home, he finds Indrid and asks him to do the honors. Indrid does them every time. Perfectly.

---------------------------------------------

Indrid stands in the green room with Ned and a cluster of arena employees. The roaring crowd a few walls away echoes through the screen. He’s never seen Duck fight, but this event required all hands on deck to handle P.R, scheduling, and making sure Duck had what he needed to win.

Duck and his opponent enter the ring. Touch gloves.

Indrid’s pulse climbs.

Then the bell sounds and no useful noises come through the T.V. Just the announcers shouting and being drowned out by the crowd. Indrid gives up on parsing the cacophony, focus only on Duck. He’s seen him practice, but in a true match he’s a different beast. His opponent is faster, that much is clear, but Duck is patient, steady, blocks and weaves until he can land blows that make Indrid hurt just watching them.

Duck is magnificent like this. Indrid has to draw him like this, has to capture this and keep it forever, he has to, he has…

He has a hard-on in the middle of the green room.

He sticks it out long enough to see Duck win and then bolts to the bathroom so it can be taken care of by the time the boxer is done with the post-fight interviews.

They go out to celebrate, and Duck never nudges Indrid aside to let someone more important sit next to him. And as the drive to the hotel, he nods off with his head on Indrid’s shoulder.

It only gets worse after that.

Duck will coax him into joining him for a run with the promise of a fancy breakfast. On cheat days, Duck orders food to the house or takes Indrid out to lunch, and somehow the thing he wants when not focused on macros is always the thing Indrid mentioned he’d been craving. He invites Indrid on hikes with him, starts taking him to all his events even though he seldom needs help or herding at them (“yeah, but it’s nice to have someone to crack jokes with”). And on days when Indrid needs to be alone, or wants to see other friends, Duck simply smiles and closes the door.

The most dangerous days are the ones without anything on the schedule. Then it’s all too easy for Indrid to pretend that they’re something they’re not while he draws at the table across from where Duck is building his model ship. Too easy to imagine that the water-wise garden Duck tends is something he put into their house, not his house that Indrid happens to live in. Too easy to admit that Indrid wants to look after him for no payment except being looked after in return.

Duck reciprocating his feelings is within the realm of possibility. Indrid’s caught him staring when he walks in on the P.A doing yoga, and the casual touches long ago made the leap from accidental to deliberate. He also knows that Duck can’t fire him--only Ned can--and hopes that might lead to the boxer slinging him over his shoulder and tossing him on the bed one of these days.

There’s also the tabloid site circulating a photo of them with a caption claiming he’s Duck’s “boytoy” in spite of them only being two years apart. They’re not even sitting that close in the picture; Duck’s just smiling at him like he’s the only thing in the world, that’s all.

Currently, he’s having an easier time keeping his feelings buried because--ever since they landed in Vegas-- Duck has been a dick the rest of the day. Well, as much as a dick as he can be; his offenses are mainly snapping at people and lacking his usual patience.

When he scolds Indrid over something silly in the hotel that night, Indrid turns and stares at him over his glasses.

“Duck, what’s wrong?”

“Wh-uh, fuck, nothing, why do you, uh, fuck, I’m fine.”

“You just snapped at me in a way that was completely uncalled for.” He crosses his arms, “is it the fight? I know it’s a big one but that’s no reason to be rude.”

Duck scratches the back of his neck, “You’re gonna laugh at me.”

“I swear I won’t. Or, if I do, it will be after you leave.”

That gets a smile, “I’m uh, well, I’m what you’d call ‘horny as all fuckin get out.’”

Indrid’s immediate thoughts would solve the problem at hand while creating a new and far worse set, so he keeps them to himself and replies, “If need privacy, I can come back later and hold all your calls.”

“Nah.” Duck sits on the bed, “You’re not supposed to get off before a fight. Makes you too relaxed.”

“That strikes me as an old wives tale. Old boxers tale?”

“Either way, it’s one Minerva still believes. If I lose, she will ask about every possible cause, includin that one. Better if I just cat nap before I start all my pre-match stuff. Come get me in fort minutes?”

“Of course.” Indrid waves and closes the door before he offers to lay down in the hopes of Duck having a wet dream while holding him.

--------------------------------------------------------

Duck wins, though it’s a tough battle to get there. He fucking hates these Pay-Per-View fights, they try to make it sound like he’s got beef with the other guy. In reality, once he’s down from a knockout, Duck is the one who helps him to the other side of the ring.

There’s a flurry of press afterwards, of questions and congratulations while all he wants to do is shower. He gets clean, promises Ned they can all go out to celebrate later. As he and Indrid finally escape to his suite he’s forced to admit that--if the thoughts of hitting the “fire” button and fucking Indrid against the wall are any indication--his problem from earlier hasn’t gone away.

“Do you need me to see if I can get a masseuse up here? You look very stiff.”

“Just uh, just tense.” Why did he tell Indrid he liked those jeans on him? He’s worn them as often as he can since.

Indrid cocks an eyebrow, “Still pent up even though the fighting is done?”

“Yep.”

The P.A shakes his head, hiding a smirk, “Do you need me to find something for you to watch?”

“No.”

“I mean it, this place has all the good channels.” He’s so earnest, picking up the channel guide like it, rather than those fucking jeans and shirt with Duck’s name on it, has what Duck needs.

“No.” He growls.

Indrid sighs, sets the book back down, “This mood is annoying us both, so just tell me what kind of porn you want and I can go out and buy it.”

“Unless they got somethin called ‘boxer jackhammers skinny artist until he cries’ we’re gonna be shit out of luck!”

The P.A blinks, “Duck, this is Vegas, I can probably find that. Or look for it on your laptop…” he trails off when their eyes meet. Duck knows he must look like he’s ready to jump him. Indrid licks his lips, “Duck? What, ah, what exactly lead to this situation?”

“You really wanna know, slim?” Duck steps across the carpet, notices Indrid padding over the black and blue patterns to meet him.

“Yes.”

Duck removes Indrid’s glasses, “Had a dream about you while I was on the plane. Woke up havin just finished fuckin you open. First thing I thought was “no big deal, ‘Drid’s right here. We can do the real thing once we get to the hotel.’ Then I fuckin remembered that we couldn’t, and I know for damn sure that if I jerk off I won’t feel satisfied because you’re be over there” he jabs his thumb at the door connecting their rooms, “so close and completely outta my reach.”

“So keep me right here instead.” Indrid purrs, fingers tentatively finding Duck’s hips. The light contact splinters his self-control and he practically tackles Indrid onto the bed, kissing him as the taller man moans and paws at his clothes.

The kiss takes the heat off enough to clear the steam fogging up his head and sits up, “This really okay?”

“I would have said if it wasn’t now for goodness sake please get back down here.” Indrid yanks him forward by the front of his shirt, smashing their lips together. He’s humming and sighing every time Duck touches him, rolling his hips to display a quickly forming hard-on.

“Aw, sugar, you gettin excited just from kissin’?” Duck grinds down just to see him gasp.

“Y-yes. I, Duck, I’ve wanted this for months.”

The implication of those words slam his desire into overdrive, “You sneaky little thing, that why you kept runnin around in tight clothes?”

“Most of my clothes h-hang off me.” Indrid holds tight to Duck’s thighs as the boxer strips his shirt off, “but yes I, I did start wearing what you liked more often.”

“Ain’t that thoughtful. And what were you hoping would happen, slim?” Duck yanks his sweats off and kicks them to the floor.

“This.” Indrid’s eyes keep slipping down to stare at Duck’s dick.

The boxer strokes himself lazily, “like what you see?”

“So much.”

“Then how about a closer look, sugar?” He crawls up Indrid’s body to straddle his face. It looks even better than normal framed by his thighs.

“Do I get to touch too?”

Duck guides his hands onto his ass, “As much as you want. You gonna be sweet and let me fuck your face, or am I gonna have to hold your mouth open?”

Indrid opens his mouth instantly, a whimper creeping out of it as Duck strokes his hair. The sound morphs into a louder, but muffled, moan when Duck sinks down. He teases his dick against Indrid’s lips, drags slick across his chin, feels his jaw tremble with wanting to close. Duck shifts so his dick touches Indrid’s tongue, “get to it. Oh fuck” he braces a hand on the wall, “heh, didn’t know Ned screened for cocksuckin skills.”

Indrid shakes his head, brown eyes wide as Duck roughly rides his face.

“No? He didn’t make you demonstrate on some of the other fighters? Didn’t make sure you could make a whole gym cum to prove your mouth was good enough for me?”

“‘O” Indrid shakes his head again, silver strands sticking to the pillow as he kneads Duck’s ass in a way that makes him groan.

“Too bad for them. Because now they ain’t ever gonna get a chance.”

A whimper and write of the torso; Duck glances over his shoulder to watch Indrid buck his hips in the air, pre-cum clear on his crotch. His feet, still in their shoes, point and flex as he moans around Duck’s dick.

“You like that, don’t you sugar?” He threads both hands into Indrid’s hair, pinning his head down or pulling it closer as it suits him, all the while gently rubbing his scalp “like knowin’ that you’re doin well.”

A harder suck in reply.

“Then be a good little cocksucker and make me cum.” He holds his head down and let’s loose, grinding and grunting in pursuit of the heat that starts at Indrid’s tongue and is steadily curling up into Duck’s belly. The other man holds him tight, moaning and licknig and sucking until Duck cums on his mouth, the lasts bursts of it happening against a slackening jaw.

As soon as his legs cooperate, he climbs off and guides Indrid to sit up in his arms. His attempt to check on the other man is interrupted by a frantic kiss.

“I was gonna ask if you wanna keep goin’, but I think I got my answer.”

“Yes, I mean no, I mean please don’t stop yet. Please I, we can do whatever you like, we can do just this, you can drag me out on the balcony and fuck me in full view of the city-”

“Easy, slim, easy.” Duck cups his cheek, “let’s start with somethin simple. Get naked and get comfy on your back for me. I gotta go grab somethin from down the hall.”

His memory turns out to be spot on; the vending machine on this floor has toiletries, including condoms and a travel bottle of lube. He buys ten of one and three of the other, drops them in the pockets of his robe and hurries back to Indrid. Sprawled on the bed, he looks painfully vulnerable, like someone who got used to life kicking him and telling him to stay down.

It’ll be different when they’re together, Duck can promise that much.

“Seem to recall you wanting me to keep you here.” He grabs a handwrap, holds it where Indrid can see, “how do you feel about me usin this?”

“Extremely good. Oh, oh hello.” He laughs when Duck rolls down beside him to pepper his face with kisses. The process of trapping his hands to the headboard is prolonged thanks to their mutual need to keep kissing every five seconds.

“Now” Duck kisses his shoulder, “I didn’t bring any toys to fuck you with, so it’s just gonna be my hand.”

“You say that as if it’s a disappointment to me and not incredibly sexy.”

“Some folks don’t think you’re fuckin ‘em unless you use somethin dick-shaped.” Duck shrugs with a flicker of sadness from the last time he had that conversation.

“Tell me who insulted your body or your skills in bed and I shall stand outside their window with a megaphone informing them of how terrible their manners are and how they missed out on the finest man in the world.”

“That’d be funny” Duck leisurely kisses his belly and hips before sitting up, “but you’d have to get outta bed.”

“True. Ah well, a sternly worded email will have do OOOh, oohhhyes.” He wiggles his hips as Duck presses in the first finger, relaxing under his touch.

“Get the feelin you’ve done this before”

“Yes.” Indrid’s chest is flushed and Duck reaches up his free hand to play with his nipples.

“What’s the most you’ve taken?”

“Th-three, I believe. I, ah, I’m usually facing away so I sometimes lose track.”

“You're takin four tonight. Can’t believe anyone would wanna miss out on how you look when you’re getting fucked.” He teases the second finger to prove his point and Indrid’s mouth curves with bliss.

“My ass is many people’s type; my face not so much.”

“Fuck that.” Duck pushes the second finger in. Indrid arches, then sighs as Duck keeps working him open.

“I find it difficult to care what they thought right now. I, ahhhn, it’s much more fun to think about you.”

“About me…?”

“About right you’re doing right now and, AH, what we can do next. I do so want to sit in your lap in the hot tub back home.”

“Can manage that. What else?”

“I’d very much l-like to fuck you, however you’ll let me and, and I want us to do it right after you train some day, you look so good like thatAHgod.” The third finger is in and Indrid is now steadily pushing down on them, “and one of the times you get me to run with you I expect a blow job in reward oh, ohfuck” his eyes are wild and eager, “please do the last one, I’m ready, I want it so badly, please.”

Duck begins teasing the fourth finger, “Think all those wants of yours sound real good. You wanna know mine?”

“Absolutely. AHaahnnnahgod” The wrap tightens as Indrid clings to it, trying to stabilize himself as Duck fucks his hand into him hard.

“Soon as we get home, I’m gettin the strap-on and fuckin you for a solid hour at least. Gonna leave you so fuckin raw and relaxed you won’t wanna do anything but lay there, and you’ll goddamn get to because you’re mine and I’m gonna take care of you.”

“Duck” it’s a happy sob, Indrid’s cock bobbing in the air.

“Gonna take a trip somewhere private, just the two of us, and you’re gonna spend the whole fuckin time tied up, to the bed, a chair, whatever the fuck else I feel like so I can ride your dick whenever I want.”

“Yes.” Indrid is barely getting out words between his cries.

“And the next time you have the fuckin nerve to wear tight jeans the day I gotta fight, I’m gonna shove a vibration plug up that cute little ass and lock your cock in a cage so we can both be horny without bein able to get off.”

“Duck please, I’m close, please touch-”

He wraps his fingers around Indrid’s dick and works him over hard and fast, “Soon as I’m done with that fight, you’re gonna blow me in the locker room so I can focus on nailin your ass into next week when we get--ohfuck!” Cum hits his chin as Indrid gasps and squeaks, scratching at the wraps and the headboard.

If Duck ever loses his memory, he hopes this is the last moment to go; Indrid Cold, happy, safe, and satisfied while he moans Duck’s name.

Indrid is boneless as Duck undoes the bonds, though he rallies enough to pull the boxer into a hug so he can cuddle him like a teddy bear. He kisses his throat, feels his pulse even out beneath his lips.

“Duck? Does, ah, does this mean what I think it does?”

The phone rings right as he’s about to answer. It’s probably Ned, so he holds up a finger and grabs the receiver.

“Go for Duck. Yeah, yeah that’ll be fine” he nods as Ned explains the plan for their exclusive, late night dinner, “yeah, tell ‘em five; you, Minerva, Leo, me and” he winks at a beaming Indrid, “my boyfriend.”

#indruck #indrid cold/ duck newton #trans duck newton #reader request #meet ugly #boxer au

19 notes · View notes

qqueenofhades · 4 years

Note

the reason people prefer bernie over warren isn't that she used to be a republican, most people genuinely believe the positions she holds now. it's just that those positions A) aren't going to get her elected in a general election, because she comes across as wishywashy on medicare for all, which is much more popular among most americans than centrists think, and republican are GREAT at exploiting the wishy-washy B) isn't gonna cut it with us lefty dems either. bernie polls better against trump.

Hello there! Thank you for your contribution! *

As most people who follow me know, I am not a Political Discourse ™ blog in the usual course of things, and despise Discourse in general. Time is short, lives are precious, and usually arguing with people about politics on the internet is about the most unproductive use of such ever devised. But because you did arrive in my inbox with this opinion, which perfectly exemplifies the dangerous thinking that I was referring to in this post, which I presume is the reason for the pleasure of your company, we’re going to have a chat. I’m going to keep the snark to a minimum, because I am really not a fan of stoking Democratic tribalism or “my candidate is better than your candidate and I can’t vote for anyone else” pissing contests. That being indeed precisely what I was arguing in the above post, and the point of which, alas, you seem to have grasped but dimly. I am therefore going to go through this, because it needs to be deconstructed, and while I may make no impact on you, because I suspect your mind is made up, I am fortunate enough to have a decent following on this blog and maybe someone else will benefit from it. Who knows. The other option is Trump.

So.

Let’s take this one at a time. See for example your first claim, “Elizabeth Warren comes across as wishy-washy on Medicare for All.”

Well….

Have you tried going to her website (elizabethwarren.com) typing in “Medicare for All” and being redirected to the following document? It took me approximately eight seconds to find. It is also not just an attention-grabbing header. The full strategic plan below, when pasted into Microsoft Word, runs to an impressive goddamn 19 pages and almost 8,000 words. It outlines exactly what she will do to achieve this and concludes:

Medicare for All is the best way to guarantee health care to all Americans at the lowest cost. I have a plan to pay for it without raising taxes on middle class families, and the transition I’ve outlined here will get us there within my first term as president. Together, along with additional reforms like my plans to reduce black maternal mortality rates, ensure rural health care, protect reproductive rights, support the Indian Health Service, take care of our veterans, and secure LGBTQ+ equality, we will ensure that no family will ever go broke again from a medical diagnosis – and that every American gets the excellent health care they deserve.

Hmm. Focusing specifically on African-American maternal mortality rates, rural health care, protecting reproductive rights, support for Native Americans, vets, and LGBTQ people? I understand, however, that this can’t cut it with “us lefty Dems,” which you proclaim with the proud assurance that you and the Twitter circles of your acquaintance are in fact the only ones. I’m also… not entirely sure which candidate you’re confusing Warren with, since there are two (2) progressive candidates in this nightmare of white no-name and/or billionaire milquetoast male moderates. Their names are Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders. And every single Warren fan I know is willing to vote for Sanders if he gets the nomination, including me. I made a public pledge to vote for the Democratic candidate even if it’s Goddamn Joe Biden. You can see it here. If you are going to demand miles of receipts for Warren before you consider voting for her (and when her positions are similar to or in several cases, particularly for women, MUCH BETTER than Sanders, yes I said it), then you’re really not going to like what it looks like for the other candidates in this race. Also, are you asking these questions for Sanders, your own preferred nominee?

Next, you…. you do realize the privilege that is dripping off this ask, right? The exact thing of which I also addressed in the previous discussion:

The modern American Republican party has become a vehicle for no-holds-barred power for rich white men at the expense of absolutely everything and everyone else, and if your rationale is that you can’t vote for the person opposing Donald Goddamn Trump is that you’re just not vibing with them on the language of that one policy proposal… well, I’m glad that you, White Middle Class Liberal, feel relatively safe that the consequences of that decision won’t affect you personally.

That is…. at least as presented in this ask, exactly what’s happening here. You’re saying that you (and this mythic America/Lefty Dems ™ of which you grandly extrapolate) can’t vote for Elizabeth Warren because you’re just not vibing with her on the language of a policy proposal which she enthusiastically supports and has written a detailed 20-page manifesto on how to achieve? You really, really believe, deep down in your Bernie Bro Internet Politics bones, that you cannot vote for the smart, fearless, extra-qualified Democratic woman opposing the bankrupt reality star rapist who is literally a Neo-Nazi white supremacist whose administration is wrecking the planet and putting children in cages at the border? To name just one of the Scandal-A-Days that this nightmare administration churns out? Because the Lefty Dems (and please do not lump me and the other active leftist Democrats I know into whatever you’ve got going on here) just won’t stand for that?

Do you even hear yourself?

Did we learn nothing at all from 2016???

I’m going to guess that I’m older than you. I’m not sure whether that matters, but there’s that. It means I remember 9/11, the Bush years, the financial crash of 2008, and how this already went once before. I have also just moved back to the United States after almost half a decade in the United Kingdom, which is currently experiencing its same slow-motion disintegration into hard-right economic isolationism, xenophobia, and late-stage capitalist oligarchy. I’m also a professional historian. So it means that I, for better or worse, have a certain perspective on this, the overall patterns, the way the world has stumbled into this destructive consumerist capitalist 21st century, and what it’s doing to us.

We do not have much time left to fix any of this. I don’t care if it sounds alarmist, it’s true. If you are younger than me, this is also going to become disproportionately your generation’s problem. Rigid intellectual purity tests are exactly the thing that is preventing the left from mobilizing behind one candidate to get Donald Fucking Trump and his cabal of shameless criminals out of there before they kill the lot of us. And I’m not going to back down from saying that mindsets like the one perfectly exemplified in your ask are far more helpful to the Republicans than they are to any of us.

I have said it before, I’ll say it again: I will vote for, donate money to, and raise awareness about whoever the Democratic nominee is. If it’s Sanders, I’m going to friggin’ become a Bernie or Buster. Because at that point, his opponent would be Trump!!! If I am living in a state where it would remotely make a difference in November 2020, since at the moment I’m in Bumfuck Red State Nowhere, I would consider canvassing or volunteering for the campaign, and I am a severe introvert with social anxiety who hates talking to people when I don’t have to. And if I am willing to do this, and you and Lefty Dems ™ of your hallowed intellectual proclivities are sitting on your backsides and bitching about how Warren seems wishy-washy on Medicare for All, well then. One of us is more the problem than the other one, and it isn’t me.

(Also. once again, Bernie Sanders is eighty years old and just had a heart attack. Sorry. That remains an issue for me. There’s a year to go of grueling non-stop campaigning before the general, if he wins the primary. I’m not convinced.)

In conclusion, I have recently adopted a policy of donating a few dollars to Elizabeth Warren every time someone appears in my inbox or notifications with a comment like this. So when I thanked you for your contribution at the start of this post, I was in fact thanking you for your extra-generous donation today, December 10, 2019, to Elizabeth Warren for President:

Peace.

#politics for ts #excuse me i just need to go over here for a second #anonymous #ask

53 notes · View notes

fansplaining · 6 years

Text

Transcript: Episode 74: Ask Fansplaining Anything: Part 1

(episode | show notes)

[Intro music: “Awel” by Stefsax]

Flourish Klink: Hi, Elizabeth.

Elizabeth Minkel: Hi, Flourish.

FK: And welcome to Fansplaining, the podcast by, for, and about fandom!

ELM: This is Episode 74, "Ask Fansplaining Anything Part 1."

FK: Right. And spoiler, the "part 1" is not because we're going to be doing "part 2" for our next episode, it's because this episode is a bunch of listener letters and voicemails and we will someday probably do another episode like this in the future. We're not sure when.

ELM: We definitely will, we committed to it, we called this Part 1, there has to be a Part 2.

FK: Right. But it will be like...you know.

ELM: It can't be like, you know when you're saying a sentence and you're like, "There are a few reasons why we can't do this, A..." something something something, and B never comes. We're not gonna be like that.

FK: It's like reading a serial fanfic and there's a Chekov's gun moment and by the end they've forgotten about it and you're like oh, I guess you were writing this serially. Oops.

ELM: Oh, yeah. Does this happen to you a lot? Do you notice this a lot?

FK: Just a couple of times I've noticed it, where it's like...this didn't actually come back around.

ELM: Just a statement that was made at some point. Yeah.

FK: Yeah, and it would be...in normal novel writing process this would be edited out but because you wrote it serially it's not going to be and that's fine. No hate on those people. But.

ELM: That's part of the risks of writing serially!

FK: Exactly.

ELM: Yeah. So for context, obviously every episode we ask people to send their thoughts. So a lot of people do and sometimes we put them aside and say "we'll answer that eventually" and then they sit there for months at a time because we're delinquents. So a few of these are relatively recent, a few of them are a bit older and a million apologies if your ask has been languishing. We're getting to it now!! And I'm really sorry about that. [laughing] Usually the stuff we set aside too is stuff that we wanna thoughtfully answer, that's why, we don't just dash off an answer.

FK: We're like "yeah, we'd like to do that, but we should wait till we have lots of time to address this" and then we're like oh, shit.

ELM: And it's buried in the Tumblr drafts among the 8000 things we have queued up or whatever. So we're gonna talk about this and hopefully it won't be too long before we answer the other ones that are sitting in our box.

FK: Alright. Well. All that having been said, shall we get on with it and read some letters?

ELM: Yeah. What's our first topic?

FK: The first topic is fan tourism, based on our fan tourism episode. We've still got some of that lingering in our inbox, so.

ELM: People love fan tourism.

FK: Alright. The first letter is from Ruth. "Hi Flourish, hi Elizabeth, I have one more thought following your episode on fan tourism and Stephanie's letter on your Lori Morimoto episode. As she points out, New Zealand is not Middle Earth and Oxford is not Hogwarts. Of course if you really want to see Tolkien's old stomping ground, you really need to go to...Oxford. The film adaptations of these books have set up associations with the wrong places, but then given that neither Middle Earth nor Hogwarts really exists, what is the right place to go to be a fan tourist? Sometimes the real locations can feel like a letdown after what we've seen onscreen. The pubs of Oxford and the surrounding countryside won't seem very Middle Earthy after you've seen the Peter Jackson films. Keep up the good work, Ruth."

ELM: So I can say from personal experience, New Year's Day 2014, my friend and I were feeling kind of glum and we had lunch at the Eagle and Child, which is the pub where the Tolkien's...

FK: The Inklings. Also known as the Bird and Baby. [meaning the pub is called that]

ELM: Is that what they call it?

FK: Yeah, it's a whole thing. The Bird and Baby.

ELM: Cause my friend lived just around the corner and we were like sure, why not. I don't know. It was a very depressing New Year's Day, England in January, anyone who lived there understands, and we made the mistake of sitting at the table right in front of the display pictures and things like that. So during our depressing meal we had multiple tourists come and try to take pictures over our heads and it was like, "we can move if you want" and they were like "no it's OK." So I hope people appreciate us in those photos.

FK: I hope so too! [ELM laughing] I hope so too. No, I mean, I think that this is a good point. One of the things about this is that fiction takes us in our minds to a place that doesn't exist in the world, also. The heightened...I feel like we talked about this a bit in the Fan Tourism episode, King's Cross station not feeling like Harry Potter to me. Even though it's so important in Harry Potter. Of course, that's to be expected. And that's actually a case where literally it's written into Harry Potter and yet it didn't feel like that for me.

ELM: That's interesting because it feels right for me and I think it probably feels right for any Londoner.

FK: Yeah, absolutely, because that's what they envisioned, because they knew what it was like before.

ELM: And know what it feels like to be there and get a train...so it's as if you were not reading it in the way it was...you know. She also wrote it thinking of the wrong train station, famously. You know this?

FK: No!

ELM: There's no...because of the way the tracks are laid out, I believe it's tracks 1 through 8 are in the main section and then there's another section. I don't know if this is still true, cause it was under construction for years while they were fixing up St Pancras.

FK: But she was thinking of a different one where there could be a 9 and Three Quarters.

ELM: I believe she was thinking of Manchester. Train station. It was one of the northern train stations. There was no way for there to be a wall between 9 and 10, and so that's why if you go now you'll see it's just next to the Warner Brothers shop, which is next to the ticket office, you know? It's a big open space but yeah. So the first time that I ever went to Kings Cross was maybe 15 years ago, and it was under construction, and someone had just tacked up a sign near Platform 9 that was like "here it is!" [all laugh] Like, people just...and I like that a lot more than what's happening now cause it feels very commercial now. That felt kind of, not a sell out, you know?

FK: [laughing] I do know and I think that...I think that maybe the point of this is I don't think there is ever a "appropriate" place to be a fan tourist or an inappropriate place. I mean not like being an asshole to somebody, don't do that, don't go to a place where you're gonna be a jerk as a tourist, but I don't know, I think that people's relationships with locations and their imaginations of things in books is very personal and I think that that's...I think it's OK to not, to go and not have something be what you imagined it.

ELM: Sure! Yeah!

FK: Disappointing, but I think it's fine. It can be. It's all right that I have a complicated relationship to King's Cross. That's fine!

ELM: Would you characterize it as a complicated relationship?

FK: Well it's not THAT complicated. [ELM laughing] As complicated as any relationship could be to that! But you know what I'm saying. It's fine. It's not a failure that that wasn't what I imagined, and it's not a failure on its part either.

ELM: I think it's just...it's hard with books because you can...and that's the moment when you went there, you might have realized oh, I didn't really understand. Not necessarily oh, she didn't explain it as well as she could have, but you were like I jumped to conclusions in my head or whatever. And that can be very surprising, but it doesn't matter! The Kings Cross in your head can be right too! I feel like I'm channelling that Dumbledore scene at the end. It's all in your mind, Flourish!

FK: But it's also like meeting a celebrity that you idolized and discovering that they're short.

ELM: Wow, are you being heightist?

FK: I'm not being heightist, it's just that as a tall person I envision everyone as my height until I see them and discover that they're short next to me. And then I'm always like, wait.

ELM: Were you the one who thought Danny DeVito was a regular height, or...?

FK: No, I would never think that but I love the idea that somebody could.

ELM: It was you and another tall person on Twitter and I was like, you guys know, do you think Danny DeVito... Danny DeVito is four foot eleven, I think legally...

FK: Yeah but you know what I mean. It's not that you have a vision in your head of this person. They're not that. But it's fine. OK. Shall we listen to the next thing, which is in fact listening cause it's a voice mail?

ELM: Voice mail!

FK: VOICE MAIL! Thank you. This is from Katie and thank you Katie for leaving us a voice mail, it is amazing.

Katie: Hey Flourish, hey Elizabeth! My name is Katie and I'm really excited to be leaving a voice mail. This is a really cool thing that you guys do because I love talking way more than I love writing and I love writing quite a bit! So I've just finished catching up on some of your episodes, and I just listened to the Fan Tourism one, which I really really enjoyed, but I just wanted to talk a little bit about the fan tourism that I'm about to do in about two weeks.

I'm going to Tulsa Oklahoma which sounds crazy but that is the birthplace of the three Hanson brothers! And every year we do a thing in the fandom called Hanson Day, it's in the middle of May every year, where pretty much the entire fan base goes to Tulsa, so the city is kind of overrun with lots and lots of Hanson fans, and they do some shows and there's different activities but the main thing that we do is kind of all get together in order to hang out. Which I think is pretty much the coolest thing about this weird fandom that I'm a part of, which is the Hanson fandom.

So basically it's just about four or five days where we all get together and hang out and see the city where they're from, we do their studio, and it's just a really cool behind the scenes situation that I don't think a lot of music fandoms get, and I mean, I know from being a part of huge music fandoms that that is very very specific to the Hanson experience. And I'm just really excited about it, and I think it's a cool thing that we get to explore as their fans. Anyway, I love you guys, I love this podcast, I listen as much as I possibly can, and I think you're awesome. Keep doin what you're doin. Bye!

FK: I really liked hearing about this because it was almost the in-between...when we were talking about fan tourism, fan conventions, Elizabeth, you were just in a convention center, and so maybe that was too sterile and it could be anywhere and the only thing about that is other people and it's not really tourism, and it seems like this is kind of...this is kind of in between that. It's a place that is associated with the band but it sounds from what Katie's saying that the experience is more about being with other fans. There is a tourism experience, but the main thing that makes it special is about the fandom, and I think that's really cool.

ELM: Absolutely. And to clarify especially with conventions and my experience with them, the ones where the convention...the hotel and the convention bit are in the same space, it's that people are not...barely leaving the building. You know?

FK: Totally.

ELM: Especially in the summer, that kind of thing. So it's impossible for me to think "oh, this is really..." Even if it was in the town that your television show is set or something. If you just stay in the convention center...unless your show is set at a convention center.

FK: Oh that would be amazing.

ELM: Why hasn't anyone pitched this!

FK: It's funny because the...you know, there's actually a YA novel out now called "The Pros of Cons" which is in part based on an experience at a convention that I ran, which we should read and talk about maybe.

ELM: Why have you never mentioned this before?

FK: I don't know, I didn't realize I hadn't!

ELM: All right! Well.

FK: Anyway, as we talked about a bunch of things recently I realized one of the reasons why I was so into the idea that conventions could be fan tourism, is because a lot of the conventions I went to had a lot more of that tourism incorporated in them. Going to the Harry Potter park as part of the convention, or once a convention we held was in Salem Massachusetts and the point was to go and do all the American witch history...

ELM: Such an American, Flourish.

FK: Yeah well whatever though right? This was at a time when lots of people were imagining what the American Hogwarts might be like, and that was the point of being in Salem.

ELM: Little did they know...

FK: Yeah, little did they know.

ELM: That it was gonna be in the proper Massachusetts, not the stupid end of the state, but the good end of the state. Get ready. You wanna have a Massachusetts fight? Cause you look like you're gonna throw down right now.

FK: [laughing] I'm not going to throw down, I was just amazed that you were the first person I know who is not actually from that end of the state who has made this assertion.

ELM: Well, I went to college in Western Massachusetts so I did live there for four years and my hometown is less than...probably about a half an hour drive to the border. So obviously I'm gonna defend Western Mass.

FK: You are kind of from there.

ELM: But I don't dislike Boston, but I do think that Boston thinks that the rest of the state cares about it, and I just want to clarify right now that Western Mass is not worried about Boston.

FK: Boston thinks that a lot of people care about it that don't care about it at all.

ELM: [laughs] That's true. But it doesn't even need to be said for something like New York. I know. This came up when the Ilvermorny thing came out and people were doing all these Boston headcanons. "Do they take the T to the..." and I was like, This is in the fuckin' Berkshires! Are you serious! [laughing]

FK: I remember these discussions. We don't need to go further into it.

ELM: They take the bus to Albany!! It's the closest city! [laughing] Oh man. You want me to write about the Albany wizarding scene? Cause I could do that for you.

FK: You know what's horrifying I've been to the train station in Albany so many times and now I'm forced to imagine that there's Albany Harry Potter trains and I'm horrified.

ELM: I know it only seems like there's the two tracks but there's a secret magic track that you probably don't know about cause you're not from the area.

FK: Alright, we need to move on. [all laughing] The next ask...

ELM: New topic, new topic! So I believe this was an anonymous ask on Tumblr. We got this awhile that so you're one of the people we're apologizing to for the delay.

"This isn't so much a question as something I've been thinking about. Recently I was having a discussion with my father about the difference between Civil War Reenactors and the SCA." Pause, that's the Society for Creative Anachronism. I just learned about this. We'll explain that in a second. So it continues, "I mostly think of transformative works in the form of fanfic and fan art, but I started to think about the SCA in that light too, because they're not just reenacting the same battle, they're taking bits of history and making things, like arts and crafts and fights too. Love your guys' podcast!" Thanks! I'm saying thanks to that bit. And thank you for writing in! So tell me about the SCA.

FK: So the SCA is a group of people who like to get together and be creatively anachronistic. And basically what this means is they do anachronistic...

ELM: Anachronistic, to clarify, if people don't know what that means, anachronistic means something that is temporally incorrect, I would say. Like if you were wearing jeans, if you time traveled to the 1600s and you had a pair of jeans on.

FK: Right. And the SCA is into the medieval period, but kind of as I understand it, and I am not myself an SCA person so SCA people please correct me, but as I understand it they're not so...when someone attends an SCA event they dress up in a particular time period and place, but someone else might be from a slightly different time period and place. One person is, this is from 1300, and the other person is from 1400, and they're very...one of them's Dutch and the other one is from somewhere in the Middle East and they are doing a very, they're attempting historical accuracy for the point that they're in, but this other person is doing historical accuracy for the point that they're in, and then they meet up in this big meetup and they joust.

ELM: OK but it wouldn't be like, I went and wanted to pick and choose parts of my outfit, some from 14th century...

FK: I don't think that would be appreciated.

ELM: Or steampunk it.

FK: I think there are people who like steampunk who are also in the SCA but I don't think that's part of the SCA scene.

ELM: So you need to be internally consistent but you all get together in this vague general long middle ages.

FK: Right, and then there's also these different kingdoms, these areas of the country which are ruled by courts and people are elected to the courts as members of the group and they get together and enact battles, which are not historical battles, they're fantasy battles but they're historically accurate kind of fantasy battles. So it's this interesting place between historical reenactment and have some medieval inspired fiction.

ELM: That's interesting. So it's interesting that this also sprung up as the asker talking with their father about the difference between that and civil war reenactment, which is...civil war reenactment...for non Americans, I feel like civil war reenactment probably does get a lot of people outside of the US have probably encountered this concept via American pop culture. But basically people reenact battles from the Civil War.

FK: And it's also I think, interesting, because everywhere in different areas of the country, people reenact...do historical reenactments. Where I grew up there was, near Sutter's Fort [in California] where gold was found, there were these Pioneer Days where people would go and reenact, I took part in some of them.

ELM: Did you shout things like "I'm prospectin' for goooooold!" Did you sound like a prospector?

FK: No. I was mostly a child, and so my job had to do with doing a lot of chores. And having a backstory.

ELM: I think it was 5th grade we had to do a poster for history day or whatever and I chose to do it on women in the gold rush. Women made a shitload of money!

FK: They did make a shitload of money! Women made a ton of money.

ELM: I'm so proud of those ladies! And my mother helped me...

FK: Sell shovels. [laughing]

ELM: It was literally, they were charging extraordinary markup for basic tasks. My mother helped me use a lighter or a match or something, some fire, to make the edges of the poster look worn.

FK: Yeah!! Did you soak it in tea and everything?

ELM: I think we found posterboard that was already kind of mottled and legit. I think I did pretty well on that one. [laughing]

FK: Point is this is common in the US, I don't know how common it is everywhere else, I assume other places also do this historical thing to do with teaching or to do with particular historical sites, but civil war reenactment is a subculture and it's obviously a fraught subculture because the civil war is a fraught issue!

ELM: There are different ideological takes on the civil war and definitely if anyone's involved in these community I would love to be corrected but my understanding from reading about this, it's definitely ways that you can do it that further an ideological narrative that is probably somewhat problematic in framing it as, you know. I don't know. Just tiptoeing around what's going on right now. So...that's tricky.

FK: Right. I think it would be fair to say that there are definitely reenactors who go all the way on the "the South was a lost cause, the glorious South, things were better when there was slavery," all that.

ELM: You're gonna go right there, this is what I was tiptoeing around [laughing]

FK: I'm gonna go right there! Because I think there were some people who are like that and some people who are very much on...

ELM: Historical accuracy.

FK: I'm just a history nerd and this is the most important thing that happened in the town that I'm in so I'm interested in it, you know what I mean. It's a complex issue. Which by the way, this reenactment stuff is still complex in other places. At Sutter's Fort it is not uncomplex to do a reenactment of gold rush settlers showing up and fuckin' up the Miwok. I mean, they didn't...it's not like...

ELM: Do they do that part in the reenactment?

FK: Well, it was an economic...as I understand it it was a long term economic fucking up, so yes, they are reenacting the long term...

ELM: That's harder to reenact.

FK: No it's not, it's easy to reenact cause you have all these people here in this fort engaged in what would be one day of the long term economic fucking up, you know? I think that it is in fact, it's harder to see but it is totally implied in the reenactment, so.

ELM: This is a tricky thing to think about, too. I don't know, did I tell you about the Hitler record that I saw last week?

FK: ...no.

ELM: [laughs] It's haunted me! I discussed it at length with the friend that I saw it with yesterday. I went to this used record faire last weekend and there's thousands of thousands of records and I wasn't playing, I don't have a record player, I was just hangin' out with my friend who was looking for some specific stuff. So flipping through these hundreds of records, idly, I came across one that looked like it had come out in the 60s, I would estimate, from the way the cover looked.

And it was Hitler's speeches, some of them, and it did not look like an archival historical thing. It was clearly certain excerpts of his speeches had been chosen. One of them was Goebbels introduces Hitler, that was one of the tracks, and then there was patriotic Nazi songs. And then there was this blurb on the back that was like, well, obviously this was all very bad. But we must not forget history. And I just thought it was the most halfassed, I just thought, this is incredibly irresponsible and who did they think they were making this for if not for neo-Nazis a few decades after World War 2?

FK: I don't know but I now am really interested to find out what the story is behind this record, because...

ELM: I should google it. If we can find out any information obviously we should put a content warning on this, uh, but we were discussing it a lot and it makes me think about civil war reenactors too or people who engage with history, if there are lines that should be drawn between engaging with history in a fannish way, and what that means, an enthusiastic way. Obviously this is something I've thought about a lot as someone who spent years studying the history of British imperialism. There's definitely on the conservative end of the spectrum of people writing about the British empire, they're writing about it in a reverential "we should go back to that!" kind of thing. Obviously most post colonialists are not, they are critiquing it and saying it was really racist. But you know what I mean?

FK: Totally. I think that there's also...I don't know enough about it but I think that some of these conversations have been really highly relevant in the SCA as people have talked about for instance how you have people dressing up from different parts of the world and how that fits in too, and how to expect and to talk about that and think about it and, yeah. It's further away, so it's less immediate than the Miwok at Sutter's Fort and what...what is that, cause that was literally less than 200 years ago, but it's still a relevant issue.

ELM: Still, these are all the things that...and World War II is obviously more recent than that. I just think that fandom, a lot of...all across all sorts of corners of fandom right now people are getting so wrapped up in talking about the morality of the fictional things that they're into, or the ship that they like, or whatever, and it's really a lot harder when it's real stuff. And you see some of these clashes when it comes to RPF. And that's contemporary...in a way that's the contemporary version of history, right?

If I'm really into, I don't know. I wrote a paper on Charles James Fox, the Whig leader in the late 18th century, back in the day I was really into reading about him. Obviously I've always really liked the Whigs. I think that regular listeners can tell. I think you see it with contemporary RPF conversations where people get really muddled because it's easy enough to say, like, this thing you like, this book is problematic. But it's a lot harder when it's a human or a historical event that happened. Obviously you can say that's problematic but there's no way to erase that. You can just say "don't read that book" but you can't say "oh, this historical event didn't happen," or "this person didn't actually cause this harm" or whatever. You know what I mean? Complicated.

FK: And also the way those things get used or re used as symbols. We talked a little bit about pagan symbols being white nationalist or hippie pagan, but also I studied classics in college and a lot of people I know have different tattoos of things to do with the Roman empire, and those get used by fascists. You know? Again, it's something that's 2000 years old and doesn't mean that in the context of a classicist [laughing] getting a tattoo, but at the same time there can be these moments where you're like "ah fuck," so. This is sort of off the point of the question.

ELM: The Roman empire, so problematic, Flourish.

FK: Can I just say that Cicero is my favorite, favorite awful person?

ELM: Good to have one!

FK: He is, was, an awful person and I love him so much.

ELM: I gotta figure out who my favorite awful person, it's a long list.

FK: Cicero's definitely my number one. OK. Let's keep going.

ELM: Alright, let's see.

FK: That closes out our fan tourism and people being fans together section and the next section is about our alternate universe episode! So this first letter, we got an ask that said something similar to it as well and they were so close that we're just gonna read one, so thank you asker. But here's the letter. And I think we're gonna cut this one down a little because it's pretty long. Hope we cut it down right, Emma.

"Hi Flourish and Elizabeth. I'm a super big fan of Fansplaining, I really appreciate the work you all do and I've learned so much. However I was a little bit taken aback by the recent episode about alternate universe fic. Neither of y'all like to read AU fic according to this ep, which is obviously totally fine, but then the guest on this ep also doesn't particularly read AU, so the episode was mostly about why y'all don't like AU fic. There seemed to be a lot of pondering about why someone might like or even prefer AU fic, but without any real answers because that point of view wasn't represented.

"I think that y'all had lots of good points about the negatives of AU fic, especially modern AU fic. I think it's true that it's more common for characters to feel quite different in a modern AU fic than a canonverse fic. However, I've read canonverse fic where the character or characters felt quite different based on the assumptions made by the specific fic writer, or on a different interpretation of canon events or actions.

"I don't read modern AU fanfic for every fandom I'm in, but I did want to talk about why I read only modern AU fic for one of my fandoms, The 100, just to put that perspective out there. I was a mega-fan of The 100, it was my favorite show. Then Season 3 happened and was a dumpster fire. Normally when a show turns to shit you read fix-it fic and move on, we've all been there, but The 100 was different to me. Season 3 was so shocking, so heartbreaking, so viscerally upsetting, that I couldn't and still can't bring myself to go anywhere near canon. I find it too painful. Modern AU fic allows me to hold on to the characters and relationships I love but discard everything that's upsetting or rests too close to that upsetting material. I also get to stay connected with my friends in the community, even though I no longer watch the show.

"While modern AU fic can feel distant or out of character, I think that it can also serve a purpose and I think that's worth discussing. Thanks for reading! I look forward to listening to the next episode." And that was from Emma.

ELM: OK! So I have a lot of thoughts about this, do you want me to read the second AU letter and then we can talk about all the AU stuff?

FK: Yeah, let's do that. We'll talk about them together.

ELM: "Hi guys. I very much enjoyed the latest episode on AUs, but it sounds like none of you have read idiopathicsmiles' wonderful Les Mis high school AU, 'World Ain't Ready.'" Pause, side note, eight million people have recommended this in the Rec Center. It's incredible. I feel like we should read it just because so many people are into it.

FK: Alright!

ELM: "I highly recommend it. I'm not usually a fan of high school AUs, but 'World Ain't Ready' is one of my all time fave fics in any fandom. You don't need any knowledge of the canon to enjoy it. Like Morgan's fic, it leans into the idea that teenagers are dumb in a very affectionate, relatable way, and it's also hilarious and emotionally affecting and you should definitely go read it. "Incidentally, Les Mis is another fandom that is completely dominated by AUs to the extent that canon era fics need to be tagged as such for people to be able to find them." Wow. "Part of this is due to the..." I said wow, just FYI. [laughs] "Part of this is due to the difficulty of writing fics set in 19th century France, if you don't have the relevant historical knowledge, but I think another factor is the fandom faves..." I never know how to say these guys' names.

FK: Enjolras and Grantaire. I think.

ELM: How would you pronounce...

FK: Enjolras. I think.

ELM: I took French, I don't know why I am having a crisis over these names. Enjolras and... Grantiere?

FK: Grantaire.

ELM: Grantaire! Grantaire. "...have only minor roles in canon and are quite broadly characterized as a pasionate idealist and a drunken cynic respectively. These basic types, and the dynamic between them, are very appealing, especially for stories about social justice and political issues and the lack of detailed characterization in canon makes them easily transplantable into a modern setting and allows fans to fill in additional details however they choose. For instance many writers show Grantaire struggling with mental health issues, which isn't explicitly indicated in canon, though it definitely can be read into it, but it's an idea that a lot of people find compelling and it's something that's easier to deal with in a modern setting than in canon era.

"I think that's a key part of the appeal of AUs generally, the ability to focus on just the aspects the writer's interested in, whether exclusively romance or other things as well and ignoring the complicating factors that may be present in canon.

"Anyway, thanks for reading all my rambling, I hope it makes sense, orangistae." I hope that's how you say it, who is a frequent submitter to the Rec Center, so you are one of my heroes thank you very much orangistae.

FK: My first thing, and I just want to get this out of the way in talking about this, I feel like I must have given the wrong impression in this episode, the AU episode, and suggested that I never like AUs and don't like them at all.

ELM: I was actually taken aback that two people, both the asker and the first email writer, both said that. Maybe it was the impression we gave about high school AUs that led people to think we disliked all AUs? But you talked at length about how you were always there for certain things.

FK: Yeah, but also... I think I must have given the wrong impression and I think you're right that that must have been it. I think if people go back and listen to our Reylo episode, I wrote, I even wrote a whole thing about what are the reasons why I like AUs in that fandom, so I don't know. That's tough. But that said, obviously it was an impression that people had, so I'm glad that people wrote in and said why they liked AUs, because I agree with. [laughing] These are good reasons to like AUs!

ELM: Sure, and I also think it's a fair point and I regret that we didn't say this, the idea that there are plenty of quote unquote canon fics where characterization is wildly off...like, so it's not...it's not, and to the point where sometimes people even say it, they'll be like "this is kind of OOC but I'm just going there" and you're like "OK."

FK: And also the difference between canon and fanon interpretations of people's character and what that character even means. Obviously the one that I care about the very most at all times is Snape who has a canon characterization that is, he is a total fuckboy. And [laughing]

ELM: He's so bad, Flourish.

FK: It's just so bad.

ELM: Uchhh.

FK: Whereas I think there's a very highly developed fanon idea of him that actually conforms in many ways to canon, but the difference is that he's not such a dick. And this is...this exists for historical fandom reasons, but definitely is not in character. So. I think. You know. Yeah. That's a thing.

ELM: It's hard, and that thing leads me into the idea of whose...not even rough edges but whose problematic shit canonically gets softened away. You know. This comes back to this idea that we're constantly talking about of who gets certain treatment and who doesn't in fandom and that kind of thing.

FK: Yeah although I will say that I think that for Snape in the best ones it's...he's actually still awful just in not exactly the ways that JK Rowling makes him awful. But.

ELM: Still! You know.

FK: They're boring ways. They're boring ways!

ELM: Yeah but you could say that if you spend all your time...I don't know. I don't wanna really get into this idea of, you're glossing over an abuser or something, you know. Which is definitely a discourse point talking about Snape, that kind of thing. But I do think it's tricky sometimes when fanon can overpower canon so much that you wind up glossing over certain things or, and then as I just said, the fact that it's sometimes it's not universally distributed, this kind of softening.

FK: Right, because people do it in order to make people fall into tropes or stereotypes, this is obviously what's happening with Snape, so yeah, totally.

ELM: Yeah, it's tricky. But on the flip side of that, this kinda connects back to what Emma was saying about The 100 and their experience there. And a kind of way of, I don't know how to characterize it. Protecting yourself? From the trauma, maybe trauma is too extreme. But the sadness...I'm not being very articulate right now [laughing] But if you find something that's really hard to watch but you still love the characters, AUs can definitely perform that function. The flip side is true too, not necessarily an AU for this, but if you want to use fiction to process your own traumas, then go ahead. You can write your characters, it doesn't have to be hurt/comfort but it might be. You can put them in situations that help you, that give you a lens through which to process the hard things too. It can go in both directions. I think there is a stereotype or an assumption that it only works one way, that it's taking hard canon and making it softer and approachable.

FK: Right, but it does go the other way for sure.

ELM: I think that's a ...and this ties up in a...

FK: And even sometimes in the same piece. In the same character you can have people who are taking hard canon and making it softer, and people who are making it harder.

ELM: You mean like in the same story?

FK: No not in the same story but in the same fanon character. If you have a character...I'm trying to think of a non Snape character to use as an example [ELM laughs] But if you have a character who's like that, who some people are like oh, but I'm really into this person even though they're a dick, people take that in both directions. People woobify, and they also...

ELM: Dickify?

FK: Dickify.

ELM: [laughing] Yes, that's true. I'm also thinking maybe it can even happen in the same story. We were talking about when you have big swooping canony stuff, you can take away the swoopyness, which not necessarily softens it, but makes it more realistic. And then that can actually give you space to do more character work, I feel like.

FK: Right. And then you can also do it the other direction and make it bigger and swoopier.

ELM: You can always make it swoopier.

FK: [laughing] As we know because the most popular Reylo fic right now takes Reylo, already big and swoopy, and makes it even bigger and swoopier.

ELM: Swoop it up!

FK: Swoops it up. It is a canon compliant with the Legends canon forced marriage AU. So. As you might expect.

ELM: Your favorite.

FK: My favorite!

ELM: Lack of agency, forced marriage.

FK: Lack of agency, love it, #loveit. OK. Should we take a break before we read the rest of the letters?

ELM: Yeah, I think we should.

FK: OK.

[Interstitial music by Stefsax]

FK: Alright, we're back.

ELM: We are back! Alright, what's next?

FK: OK. This first letter is by PersephoneGarnata, Seph, and I'm gonna compress it a little bit for length just so that we have enough time to get to everything. So.

"Hi Flourish and Elizabeth, not prompted by anything in a recent episode of the podcast, but I was wondering if you were planning to do anything on fandom and age at any point? There's a popular perception that fandom is full of teenagers and people 'age out' of it. I expect that's true to an extent, but there are of course many people in their 20s, 30s and older who are still in fandom.

"My own experience here is perhaps slightly unusual - I've aged into fandom. I didn't get seriously into fannish activities until my early 30s. There are a few reasons for this. One reason is simply that, for a period of several years, I wasn't really into anything that came with a significant transformational fandom. Another reason is that I suffered a period of ill health when I had a lot of time to fill, at home, by myself - fanfic to the rescue! And a third reason is that, as I've matured, I've become a lot less judgey about fandom. I used to be a bit sniffy about fanfic, thinking it inferior to 'proper' books and 'proper' writing. Even after I got into reading it more, I kind of thought of it as mostly a guilty pleasure, reading about sexytimes between your favourite hot guys, not as something that could stand up as literature. That all changed after reading some fic which ruined my life (in a good way). These days I am a vocal proponent of the Fanfic is Great school of thought, and I just wish I'd got the stick out of my butt a bit sooner.

"Being an 'Aged-In' fan can sometimes be a little odd, because I'm the same age as many of the people who've been in fandom for years and have the same level of general life experience, but I missed out on many formative experiences like Strikethrough and Dashcon. I went straight from Fiction Alley to Archive of Our Own! Many of the fans I interact with online are much younger than me, which is normally cool, but occasionally I get a bit weirded out when I realise that quite a lot of that interaction could technically be described as sharing sexually explicit material with minors (but hey, I always try to tag my stuff appropriately!)

"Finally... a callback to one of your early episodes for making me feel like an Ancient. In your episode on Wattpad, I remember you talking about teenagers writing fics called stuff like 'Dean Winchester is my father', and thinking 'but Dean isn't old enough to have a teenage daughter... oh wait, yes he is.' I'm roughly the same age as Dean so the thought of teenagers thinking of him as a father figure is oh my God I'm so old! Thanks for reading my thoughts, keep up the good work! Seph."

ELM: So we have talked about this a bit. We should probably dig up some of the links for the show notes.

FK: Yeah, for sure.

ELM: We definitely have talked about sharing space with minors, and how there seem to be differing attitudes on this. And I think both our perspectives come from historically having been minors in fandom growing up with the idea that it is up to the young person...we always had to kind of lie and say "oh it's fine! I'm 18, don't worry about it," never an expectation that adults would change their behavior or the way that they were communicating with each other. If you wanted to be included in adult conversation, you had to lie and say you were an adult. And I can't see the other way around, honestly.

FK: Yeah. I agree. I think that we've struggled with this because it has been such a hot button issue when we've talked about it before and also because I think neither of us want to be the old people talking about the teen experience. I think it's complex, to talk about age in fandom we would want to have on people with...

ELM: Teens?

FK: Yeah, teens, and also much older people, and it would just be hard to fill different kinds of experience.

ELM: I think it would be worth doing.

FK: I think the summary of this is yes we've considered it and yes we would like to do it and maybe we will do it. We have vague nebulous intentions. It's slightly moving partsy. But we're gonna figure it out. Right?

ELM: I just think, I think this discourse is gonna keep happening. I think that, it frustrates me to see but I also don't read it and think "oh, am I too old to be here?" Because I'm surrounded by people in their 30s and 40s and 50s who are in fandom and people who have great jobs and relationships and families and things and still manage to write extraordinary fanfiction and this weird...it's not just fandom, the idea that women in particular stop existing as whole people when they reach certain ages or when they have children or whatever. So don't let that get to you is what I would say. Easier said than done!

FK: True. Alright, let's read the next one.

ELM: OK, I'll do it. "Hello Flourish and Elizabeth! Ao3 announced that they will be updating their search feature, which is probably long overdue." This came in a few weeks ago. "But it got me thinking about fandom metadata and how we look for fic. (Blame Episode 19 of your podcast, Shannon Fay Johnson's article for Transformative Works and Cultures," we'll put a link to that in the show notes, "and the day job, I'm a cataloging librarian.)" Woooo! That's me, cheering for librarians.

"Most communities tag and organize their fic very differently from one another. FF.net has very rigid tagging capabilities, AO3 is a mix of formal tags and free-form tagging. tumblr is a mess, some people tag, some people don't. I was a member of several different livejournal communities, all had different ways of tagging fic. Sometimes this is on purpose - people would rather use fandom specific terms to keep outsiders from finding their fic. I remember when people used to tag things "Wolfstar" instead of Remus/Sirius, for instance.

"So my question for you is, how do we findthe fics that we're looking for? Do people stick to the same searching strategies, or do they vary across platforms? Mine look completely different, even in the same fandoms. The way I look for star wars fic changes with each level of the universe I'm looking at (prequels, original, new trilogy, clone wars, or rebels).

"I'm curious how other people go about it! Or is it all just luck of the draw when you go browsing? Waiting for recs? Finding a favorite writer and sticking with them and what they like? Thanks! I enjoy the podcast! Kate McManus." I love this letter!

FK: Thank you Kate! So actually I have a proposal for this. I think that we should invite, I think you and I should each write up our fic finding strategies, just quickly, and we should invite other people to do the same thing, and maybe we should write something about that. Cause I would be interested to know how other people do this too, and I think that probably there will be a wide variation.

ELM: Absolutely and I have a lot of feelings about this, because I am in literal AO3 hell for the last now it's been month and a half. Oh god. Time's tickin' away. So I've been having to actively find fic a lot, right? And I have strategies.

FK: I do too, and mine vary a lot depending on fandom and where they are. OK. So that's what we're gonna do then right?

ELM: OK so we are gonna write this down and listeners are gonna write in and tell us how they find fic. OK.

FK: And we're going to drum up people to do it and then we'll do a roundup or something.

ELM: Alright, so send in your stuff everyone.

FK: OK. Next letter. "Hey. Thank you so much for your excellent podcast! I'm writing with a request: could you maybe do an episode on how to make fandom friends online? This is something I've never figured out how to do, even though I've been a voracious consumer of fanworks since Highlander in 1996. How does one go from being a regular commentor on fic or resharer of Tumblr posts to forming a friendship with someone? I'd love to hear your stories of how you both managed it. Thanks!" And that I think was an anonymous ask on Tumblr.

ELM: Yeah I think it was anon. We are literally two of the worst people to answer this question.

FK: Because you never make friends and I always do? No, that's not right.

ELM: No I've made plenty of friends since I stopped lurking, but using my real name and writing very popular articles about fandom in mainstream publications! So I remember at one point in Sherlock fandom I made a rec list, someone asked me for recs and I added the people who I liked and I was like "oh I really love blank's fic, and I love blank for this and blank for this," and they all followed me. And if I had been some random person just saying "I like blank blank and blank," would they have followed me back immediately? But because my real name is attached to it and my real name is attached to articles that were being widely shared in the Sherlock fandom, they knew who I was and then they were like...I'm not saying that my writing is so irresistable that no one can say no to my friendship... [laughing]

FK: Yeah. But I will say this, I just started posting a long serial written fanfic under a sock...

ELM: Oh yeah!

FK: ...and no I'm not gonna say what the sock is but people can figure that out, I'm sure, if they look at my history, don't worry, you can figure it out. Go do some sleuthing.

ELM: And all of your psychological hangups in fic form.

FK: All of my hangups. It's just very obvious who wrote this fic if you think too hard about it. So anyway, I have this sock, and it has started getting comments and there is a person who I feel like I have a growing baby maybe gonna actually be a friendship someday at which point I'll have to tell them who I am and that that's my sock. And they commented and we got into a conversation in their comment on my fic. So I think that is...that's certainly the way it always worked before I was high profile in fandom and I think that must be how it goes.

ELM: I think a lot of people who want to make friends...being the fic writer is the privileged position. Because I think most people are not gonna be the fic writer. [FK makes agreement noises] Or if they are are they gonna be the fic writer that generates enough attention to get several people commenting? I think there is definitely resentment around "BNFs" in particular, part of that is because it's such a...it's kind of a celebrity-fan relationship in the sense of you can feel like you have an intimate relationship with someone's fan presence, their fic, if they have a lot of followers then you probably see their content a lot, you know. And how do you say...I'm here too! And I say this with many years of lurking, I definitely felt like I had a personal relationship with some of my favorite authors, but first of all I didn't...what was I gonna do, be like "hey!" You know? I knew these were very popular writers too so then it definitely feels like I'm a fan and they're a famous person. You know?

FK: I agree but I do think there's something...first I think you're right. I think you're absolutely right that...

ELM: [laughing] Cool. First things first!

FK: But I also think that it doesn't...I think a lot of people feel like it has to be "I'm going to be a writer and that's the way I'm going to contribute to this community, and then therefore people will talk to me and they'll care," and I don't think that's the only way you can make community contributions that cause people to speak with you and engage with you and make friendships. I think people do it through writing meta, through having fic recs, I think people do it through any form of...

ELM: All of these are creation! I don't mean to just pin it on, I think this is the example I gave.

FK: I think they are all creation but I think that is kind of part of how you make friends!

ELM: I think it's also quite challenging to make really good, you know, really good gifsets or really good fic rec lists! So that, I think that's a bar. It's really hard and I imagine there are actually lots of people in fandom who are semi lurkers who, and don't have access to cons, maybe don't feel comfortable with IRL stuff, and there's no...it's very hard I think to laterally find people who are also similarly not high volume content creators and who wanna be friends. And it seems like it's a, you know, you need some kind of singles bar or something cause there's so many parasocial relationships.

FK: I think it's one of the reasons people like cons. It's one of the few places where you can see people face to face and say "hey, thing!" And talk to someone in a line or whatever.

ELM: And that's not to say, I'm sure, I don't know what it would be like to be a popular fic writer but it's not to say that they're on some pedestal and they don't actually want fandom friends, you know. You never know...

FK: I also think that it's actually, it doesn't have to be a fan-celebrity situation. I think that just having opened a conversation through this creative thing that you made, then people contact you because they have engaged with it and then the conversation is started. And that is a position of power even if it's only incredibly small. I think saying "fan celebrity" makes it seem like it's a big deal, I can promise you that this fic I'm writing I am not a celebrity by any stretch in this fandom. [laughing]

ELM: Not celebrity but like...cult famous author.

FK: Oh, thank you, thank you. [laughing] I see what you're saying. I think it's hard, and that is the way that most people do it.

ELM: You know what, here is my recommendation. You should start a fandom newsletter and get thousands of people to sign up and then you literally write in the newsletter "I'm into this show Black Sails, you should message me if you like it." And then multiple people will message you and then you wind up in their guest room at Oxford!

FK: Sounds like very relatable and reasonable advice. [laughing]

ELM: This is why I'm saying it's not helpful! And I don't know, I say this with full knowledge of having been a lurker for a very very long time. And not, you know, ten years ago...it's not necessarily something I would have even wanted to do. Obviously I'm very grateful to the friends I made through fandom while talking out loud about things, but I have a complicated relationship with being really open about my feelings about the source material. Some of that's very private to me, you know?

FK: I agree with you, I guess the thing I'm struggling with is I feel like it relates to making friendships in any community to some degree. I've been bouncing around from church communities for a long while now and one of the things I realized after trying to find a church community and failing and feeling really alone and sad was that the only way for me to actually make friendships within that community was to volunteer for shit and be on fuckin' flower guild or altar guild or...you know what I mean? Just do shit instead of hoping people would talk to me.

ELM: Were you just hoping if you shook their hand and you said "Peace!"

FK: "Peace be with you!" right?

ELM: And then they'd be like "Best friend forever"? Sometimes I think this!

FK: Exactly! And I think giving a kudos or whatever, for a lot of people...

ELM: Have you had this feeling? I had this today. I always think this at peace. What if I shake hands with someone and then we decide we wanna be best friends? It literally will never happen from a peace, but yeah.

FK: So only by, and that's not easy either, and it requires...and not everybody can and this is one of the reasons why that's hard and I feel like it's not the same thing exactly in fandom, but I think they're related.

ELM: Participating. I like that you just compared giving kudos on AO3 to exchanging peace at church.

FK: It's like on May the Fourth. May the force be with you...and also with you. And also with your spirit.

ELM: And also with thy spirit, yes...you say and also with your spirit?

FK: We don't use "thy."

ELM: I am so glad I go to my church and not your church.

FK: I am so glad I go to MY church and not YOUR church too!

ELM: "Thy" is superior.

FK: Uhhhhhhh...it certainly sound snootier. OK! Let's talk about the next one!

ELM: I love history I don't know what to tell you.

FK: That's just how you are.

ELM: Also, thy was the informal. You was the formal.

FK: I know! If you remember when I was in...

ELM: Languagesplain!

FK: When I was in Sleepy Hollow fandom...

ELM: Oh yeah! [laughing]

FK: And I got really mad that the Quakers didn't speak right.

ELM: Yeah...you wanna read... this is the last one. I'll read it.

FK: It's your turn.

ELM: But I also have feelings about it, so what if I read it and just answer it without you.

FK: OK I can read it then and then you can have feelings about it.

ELM: OK so the first one came in and then the second one came in and I feel bad. I literally set this one aside because I had so many thoughts and now it's about the Infinity War premiere which obviously happened last week, so. You'll see. The asker I think, the problem was sorted out but I think this is still relevant to us.

FK: And this was an anon ask. Two anon asks.

ELM: Two of them.

FK: That were obviously the same person.

"I obsess over a lot of fiction for comfort or escapism (quite common I'm sure). Today my mother messaged me about travel plans she made for the family - the same weekend that Avengers Infinity War comes out. I've been looking forward to this movie for over a year and was planning to go with friends for midnight showing, dress up, take pictures, etc, be part of a crowd that's equally excited. I feel truly devastated but she thinks it's frivolous. I wish for her to validate how I feel. Any advice?" Next ask...

ELM: This came in shortly afterwards. It was within a few days.

FK: "Marvel studios moved up the release today which is awesome for me, but wow, what are the chances of that timing? So disregard my last message... sort of. I'd be interested in your thoughts re: explaining fandom emotional investment to non fans who don't "get it". I'll obviously prioritize real life (especially family) over hobbies, but you can't help but feel disappointment when fandom is so special and big to you. Especially when people write off your interests as silly and shameful."

ELM: OK. So what I was gonna write, and what I still think, is that in situations like this, one thing that's helpful is to apply what I would call the Big Game Test. I don't know if you can see where this is going. You wanna go see this movie at a midnight premiere, and your mom's made plans for you? And you're like, "don't you understand how important to me this is" and your mom is like "it's just a movie."

Now say your team was in the Super Bowl. Is this situation...so say it's your grandmother's funeral and you were like, "but my team's in the Super Bowl!" Depending on your family situation, but it's almost definite that your parents would say...

FK: Depends how Grandma feels about that team!

ELM: I don't know, a very serious...we don't know your family, but under normal circumstances you would have to attend a family member's funeral even if your team was in the Super Bowl!

FK: Unless you're in Lincoln Nebraska and...actually that's college but never mind.

ELM: Wow you think that your football team is the only one that anyone cares about but in fact it's like that for all the football teams in all of the towns.

FK: [laughing] I know it is.

ELM: Maybe not the best example because it's probably true that your whole family wants to watch the Super Bowl in this case. [laughing]

FK: But we get it.

ELM: Emotionally. There are definitely situations, whereas if you're gonna have to go to your grandmother's funeral and you're like "but mom don't you understand Infinity War comes out this weekend," sorry, you have to go to your grandmother's funeral. There are definitely times in fandom where I think—and we don't know the circumstances of this and this is not specifically about this ask—but there are times where people are like "don't they understand this is really important?" and it's like "yeah but...you can't...I wanna read only X-men fanfiction right now but I do still have to go to work." Right? And I think this is sometimes an issue that I run up to in talking to people in fandom because they're like "don't you understand I'm celebrating my passion" and you're like "yeah but there are things that do have to take precedent."

And obviously the asker knows that and they say it right here.

FK: But on the other hand also...

ELM: I think it requires clarification based on some conversations I've had with people! What's the other hand?

FK: But on the other hand also if Nebraska was in the playoffs when I was growing up, you bet your fuckin' ass, not only were we going to be watching this, but my grandfather would call the entire family to come and watch with him, even the parts of the family who don't actually like...and I'm sure this is the same for other people about other teams...

ELM: You say this like it's unique and this is literally how all America feels about football!

FK: But I'm not! My point is saying... first of all, not literally all Americans feel this way about football. I have to tell you not everyone feels this way about football. But the point being that's fandom and it's a fandom that takes over the entire family even if you don't like football, you still have to be there because it's a thing.

ELM: So that's why I think it is true that I feel like when you're talking to a family member, not to make it really gendered, but more likely a dad or a male family member than a mom, even though there are tons of women obviously that love pro sports, but I definitely think it's a way to contextualize if they're like "it's just a movie you can see it whenever," you can be like "would you feel that way if it was the playoffs and our team was there?" And they'd be like "oh no absolutely." It's an easy analogy to make but it's also one that I think helps. It helps people...one of my longstanding theories on this is the idea that it's much more rare for people to be casual fans of sports in the way you can be casual fans of something like the MCU. You know?

So there's a big debacle when Infinity War came out because Richard Brody from the New Yorker wrote this piece that was like...I don't wanna get into it because I actually think he had some fine points but it was talking about the structure of the franchise. Did you see this? Talking about the structure of the franchise and how you popped into it and the characters were placed into it and you have to understand what happened in the previous 19 movies to have any idea of the context for anything, and I think part of the problem there is this disconnect between thinking of a cog in a franchise as the same thing as the standalone film. And I'm not saying that he...he could figure that out. But I do think it's a problem that we review these very different types of movies in the same space under the same rubric.

FK: Especially when nobody would say, "this game, you could understand..." I mean you can understand I guess to some extent outside of the context of what's happened in a season for your team, but...

ELM: It helps! Right. So it's like, yeah. But that was an aside. I think that you get millions and millions and millions of people who are going to see Infinity War this weekend, and they may have a vague memory of what happened in the other movies and real chill for them and "OK that was fun" they walk away. And maybe they didn't like it, I've seen some weird reactions coming out of this movie.

FK: Actually maybe this IS a little bit like the Super Bowl. You have to watch the Super Bowl even if you don't care about the teams, but if your team is in the Super Bowl...

ELM: There's three things that happen in the Super Bowl I would say in my observation at parties. There's the people whose teams are in it, then there's me who cares about a football...I cannot watch a soccer game or an American football game without getting invested in them. Otherwise I'm just like "you're literally going back and forth and I don't care." In football I have all these very specific biases.

FK: Do you have a ranking system where...

ELM: Yes. So.

FK: "I root for X over Y and Y over Z." Is Dallas at the bottom? Because Dallas should be at the bottom.

ELM: Dallas, I think Dallas should always be at the bottom. Very briefly, anyone in the AFC who is not in the Bills' division, I will always root the most heavily against the Patriots, the Dolphins and the Jets, but I prefer the AFC over the NFC cause the AFC seems soft and pure and the NFC seems evil. BUT I will root for an NFC team if they are from the rust belt.

Everything is connected to the Bills somehow. If they come from a cold, hardscrabble place, I'll root for them. I'll root for the Steelers and I'll root for the Packers and I'll root for the Vikings, cause they come from sad-ass places where people need football! If you live in Florida, you can just go sit in the sunshine and wrestle an alligator! Do you need this sport? And it's all they have!

FK: All right. So now we've gone down that entire path but what I will say, I do want to get one thing into here before we get too distracted [ELM laughing] which is to say that I thought the asker was super wise to say that I wish for her to validate what I feel, because I think a very relationships thing of like...it's not just, the question is not just "can I go see it or not" or "will I go see it or not" it's "I want my mom to understand how much I love this thing," and that's hard.

ELM: But I'm not sure...this is why I bring up, why I think it's harder for people to understand this, because everyone's going to go see Infinity War. And then be like, "well I just watched it and it was fun" and walk away, and they're like "you...wanna write stories about these characters?! I like them but I don't understand." Whereas it doesn't go in the opposite direction where you just kinda swing by the football game and you're like "cool" and then you're like "I don't understand why you're so invested painting yourself." I think it's much more rare that you casually swing by a sports game.

FK: And if you do then you totally know why the people are painting themselves.

ELM: Yeah! I mean...do we really know why they're painting themselves. It's so much. It's cold out! The hardscrabble team, it's very cold in this place, they're gonna get frostbite. They probably have alcohol poisoning anyway.

I just think it's really hard. One of the things about Ship It, if you listen to the last episode, the mom character, she's very very very supportive of all things. You know, at one point the protagonist is like, "You're gonna let me be by myself?" Trying to get her mom to say no, actually. She's trying to get her mom to get her out of it, right. And she's like "I could be offered drugs! I could get pregnant!" And her mom says something like "those all sound like important life milestones that you need to pass at some point." [laughing] And obviously I don't believe that this is outside the realm of mom attitudes, but this is not a standard mom attitude! That's undeniably not.

FK: I will say that it is a very particular Pacific Northwest mom attitude.

ELM: Yes, and an artist mom. And I totally get this mom and I've met this mom before but...

FK: It's not the standard issue mom.

ELM: But it then makes her blanket acceptance and interest and the enthusiasm and interest in her daughter's passions a lot more believable. Whereas a different type of mom would be like, "why don't you care about something real, this is a fake relationship, focus on your own life." So it works for the story because obviously we've laid the groundwork of her being this kind of person, it's just like, "groovy! You have your things you love, I'm gonna go make a sculpture out of the mini cereal boxes in our hotel" or whatever, that's not an example but she would, probably. She seems like a mixed media kinda lady. [laughing] And her dad writing poems about the convention center!

But I just, I think some people just aren't gonna get it and their minds don't work that way and maybe the way to say it is contextualizing within the fandom saying, this is actually really important to a lot of people and I'm one of those people and I know you love me and it's brought me friendships and it's made me a more creative person or any of the positive things that you think fandom brings to your life, and I think that anyone who loves you, if family members want to see you happy...as long as you're not skipping, not doing your job or school or whatever I feel like it's convincing them. That's how they can see the value and if they see the value it brings...I don't like the things you're a fan of but I like that it brings you joy.

FK: Exactly. I think that this is one of the hardest things, maybe I'm just expanding my own experiences to the world, but I think this is one of the harder things about growing up and growing into an adult relationship with not just your family but also your friends and everyone else. Sort of finding the ways that you can have those people who mean a lot to you and who are never gonna get certain things that you care about and being OK with that. And I think different people have different levels of being OK with that and I think it can be really hard.

ELM: Look at everyone, every day on Twitter I see people angry that people like something. You know that cartoon where the angel comes down and hands, the guy is like "I hate that thing" and the angel comes down in the next panel and hands him a little card and he opens it and it says, like, "OK" or something. Alright! Just OK! You know? Got it. Please calm down. [laughing]

FK: Like I said I think this has to do with...there's a lot of things, people's personalities are different like this. I say this as a person who is significantly religious and is married to an atheist so obviously I have extremely high tolerance for people believing and caring about very different things from me in a fundamental way, and some people aren't like that and that's OK too. And that can be hard, if you're like that asker. I understand that that can be incredibly hard.

ELM: Yeah. The asker sounds like...

FK: They have their shit together!

ELM: I was gonna say "head screwed on right" but then I lost the train of...

FK: You got it though, you got it!

ELM: Was that right? Is that the expression?

FK: Yeah, head screwed on straight!

ELM: Cool, so yeah. So. Thus concludes Ask Fansplaining Anything Part 1.

FK: It does. And now if you have been inspired by this episode to ask us things, the very best way to do it is by leaving us a voicemail like Katie who we love.

ELM: Katie!!!

FK: Yeah, Katie!! Like the way Katie did.

ELM: Wait wait wait, a bunch of our asks were anon asks so...

FK: You're right. That's also a great way to leave us an ask!

ELM: I don't wanna force anyone. You can also call and use a pseud or not use your name at all, say hey I'd rather not use my name.

FK: Use a voice hider so no one can know your voice.

ELM: That's incredible. Sound like you're on a Dateline special in the dark.

FK: Yeah, do that. OK. So you can do that, but also genuinely it is true I didn't mean to suggest that...if you wanna leave an anon ask that's also great. Thank you, no one has been sending us hate, thank you for not sending us hate and keep not sending us hate. [ELM laughing] GOOD JOB PEOPLE.

ELM: On Fansplaining.tumblr.com you will see the phone number that you can call if you would like to use your voice. You will see the ask button that you can turn on anon for or not to send this stuff. Tweet or Facebook, both at Fansplaining though I don't think either of those really give you enough space to say too much so...

FK: And if you really wanna stretch out you can send us an email, [email protected].

ELM: Yes! Other points of business, patreon.com/fansplaining, this is how we continue to make the podcast. Thank you to, every episode I feel like we get at least a patron or two and I really really appreciate that whether you've been listening for a long time or you're a new listener, if you find your financial circumstances allow you to give us even as little as a dollar a month. Or as much as four hundred dollars a month if you want Flourish to make you a sweater just in time for summer!!

FK: Actually if you did it right now you would probably get it just in time for winter, so.

ELM: It's an elaborate sweater. It's a Harry Potter sweater. But obviously I am not expecting anyone to give us four hundred dollars a MONTH. a MONTH.

FK: [laughing] Look it takes a long time to make a sweater ok? So if you don't have money or don't want to give us your money or whatever or even if you wanna do something nice to us in addition to giving us your money you can also review us and leave a written review, like a starred review and a written review, on iTunes. Really helps us get out there and helps people find us so please do that if you have a chance.

ELM: I think those are all the points of business!

FK: Alright! Well, in that case, you gonna go and read some X-men fanfic now?

ELM: Literally reading an AU.

FK: OK, I'm gonna go keep writing my AU under my sock.

ELM: Yeah! You know what, I do wonder, will I become a universal AU fan after this?

FK: Maybe.

ELM: And then we'll have AUs Part 2, we'll have Morgan back, we'll just...

FK: And you're just gonna be talking about how much you like AUs.

ELM: I'll be like "I only like AUs." We'll see, we'll see. I'm gonna go read some more. It's fine!

FK: Talk to you later!

ELM: Bye!

[outro music, thank yous and disclaimers]

#fansplaining #fan culture #fan studies

4 notes · View notes

verdigrisprowl · 7 years

Text

Nov 6 Dancitron Movie Night - Spider-Man: Homecoming

Guess what Prowl wasn’t here! He missed the whole movie. He missed it because Bonecrusher had a nervous breakdown and he and the Constructicons spent the whole evening dealing with it. Their room is rather a little bit trashed now.

Prowl showed up after the movie was over to ask Soundwave to leave Bonecrusher alone. In the process, he somehow managed to grievously offend Tarantulas.

Today Specs 7:39 pm ((is my username fixed so it doesn't contain swears now)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:39 pm ((i think so)) Specs 7:39 pm ((oh good. I didn't know it was doing that until I saw puff's logs and got to drink a deep cask of SHAME)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:40 pm *Soundwave's stretched across his couch with Ravage on his lap and the twins perched on its back. Laserbeak's playing along with the music on the screen, shuddering and partially transforming back and forth to help make sounds. They all seem quite comfy today.* ((LOL it's okay)) Specs 7:41 pm ((I should have been better behaved about rabbit holding ur stream hostage and I'm sorry >_>; )) Swoop 7:42 pm *literally rolls into the room, as you do* Definitely Not Shockwave 7:42 pm *Longarm strides into the room, observing the other occupants in a manner that appears awkwardly reserved.* Toothless 7:43 pm *flits in still as a teensy black dragon* ItsyBitsySpyers 7:43 pm *Soundwave twists a feeler around to look at the mechs coming in. Swoop, Bevel, the toothless scraplet... oh, there's a new face. Very well. He'll sit up properly.* *Reputation, and all.* Swoop 7:44 pm *scampers over to watch Bird "dance"with the music* :V ItsyBitsySpyers 7:44 pm {{You join.}} Specs 7:44 pm *and here comes a teensy, FURRED dragon! she's brought a basket of energon truffles this time! her paws are still bandaged up, though, and without the hideous dragon costume it's clear that her face fur is shorter than it should be, although there's long fur around the eyes. she was wearing goggles, at least.* Definitely Not Shockwave 7:45 pm *He takes note of the glance, and finds a seat fitting for someone of his size class.* Swoop 7:45 pm ((times I wish I had a gif of swoop dancing on Junkion)) Definitely Not Shockwave 7:45 pm *The guests sure are....Interesting.* Toothless 7:45 pm *gives other smol dragon a goofy, teefsless grin* Magnum Ace 7:46 pm -doesn't even pause this time. He's getting better at this- Swoop 7:46 pm Keehee! Kay! *has all the enthusiasm and physical strength for dancing but no experience, so he def looks his age* Specs 7:46 pm *the dragon gapes a grin back, and bobs her head at the other smol dragon* Hello, cousin! Bull 7:46 pm *Bull Armor is still wary following Magnum in; but remembers what the other Leaguer told him* Swoop 7:47 pm ((omg I found it http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/transformers/images/7/70/Junkiondance.gif/revision/latest?cb=20071214143716 )) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:47 pm [[Greetings. Refuel at your leisure.]] Soundwave gestures to the usual arrangement of energon and what the dragon has brought this week. Then, looking at the short mech again - as if he doesn't already know. [[What is your designation?]] Swoop 7:47 pm ((ngl it looks HILARIOUS watching all those g1 losers dance to this music)) Specs 7:47 pm ((get jiggy wit it soop)) (swoop. I meant swoop.)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:47 pm //Hey, Ace. 'N, uh. Frag. What's your name, horns?// Definitely Not Shockwave 7:48 pm ((Who was that greeting directed towards?)) Swoop 7:48 pm ((soop. swup. scoop.)) Definitely Not Shockwave 7:48 pm ((Soup.)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:48 pm ((15 minute warning))

((soundwave's was directed to longarm)) ((rumble was addressing bull armor)) Bull 7:49 pm It's Bull Armor. *Bull was less nervous this time* Magnum Ace 7:49 pm -that's good. Still feels bad about dragging him along again, though- ItsyBitsySpyers 7:50 pm //Gotcha. You got a short version, or y'wanna be full Bull Armor?// Bevel 7:50 pm *is at her usual table just existing while the mun nurses a migraine* Definitely Not Shockwave 7:50 pm *He nods, holding his hands together in a polite manner.* I am called Longarm. I presume you are Soundwave? Bull 7:50 pm Well, some just call me Bull for short. I don't mind, either way. Specs 7:52 pm ((swoop check ur inbox)) Swoop 7:53 pm ((?)) Specs 7:53 pm ((check)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:53 pm *Just as in the tapes. Well, if that's the desired cover, he's not going to break it. Longarm it is.*

[[Correct. Have you heard our rules?]] //Ace 'n Bull. Heh, you guys got somebody with a C?// Swoop 7:53 pm Me Swoop am COMEDIAN Me Swoop am COMEDIAN - Specs 7:54 pm ((you're welcome)) Swoop 7:54 pm ((i'd eat it)) Tarantulas 7:54 pm (( gosh, that soup definitely looks too hot for me Swoop 7:54 pm ((LOL)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:54 pm *Laserbeak drifts toward the dragon, hoping to score a few of the snacks before too many people get to them. She wiggles a feeler in greeting. This organic is an honored provider. They get hellos.* Swoop 7:54 pm *doesn't know how to do slower music and settles for bouncing on his toes after Laserbeak* Toothless 7:54 pm *chittersnorts at Swoopsoup* Tarantulas 7:55 pm (( also: i really want to imagine swoop doing expressive interpretive dance to this, super dramatic like, but too ooc, alas Specs 7:55 pm *the dragon bobs her head at laserbeak, too. and swoop. hi swoop* Hope you enjoy! 😄 Swoop 7:55 pm ((when he's older, he would do that XD)) ((he hasn't figured out the joy of doing things IRONICALLY yet)) Definitely Not Shockwave 7:56 pm Ah, I skimmed them. No killing, no dark energon, yes? I assure you, I'm one of the least trouble-prone Autobots in my platoon-- I'll be no trouble. Bull 7:56 pm There is Carl. *Though Bull knew Silkie would not like any one of his crew in such a strange place alone* Swoop 7:56 pm ((bird, teach him about melodrama)) Magnum Ace 7:56 pm -a small snort of laughter from over here- No, unfortunately none of our other teammates have a name that begins with 'C' Well... -And Bull's answered for him- Swoop 7:57 pm ((alternately, swoop would totally copy Tara if he had someone to dance with..... after he finished trying to grab tara's everything)) Toothless 7:58 pm *scrap-dragon tries to wriggle in time to music* ItsyBitsySpyers 7:58 pm [[Good. He has enough of it.]] *Especially with Swoop around.*

//Maybe next time this Carl fragger oughta come. Get a whole alphabet goin'. Heh.// Tarantulas 7:58 pm *tarantulas arrives just in time, but PURPOSEFULLY avoids swoop to the extent of even going the long way around the room to soundwave's couch* Swoop 7:58 pm *IS A PRECIOUS CHILD, SOUNDWAVE* ItsyBitsySpyers 7:58 pm ((bird is best tutor. FIVE MINUTE WARNING get the snacks and drinks you need)) Bull 7:59 pm Umm... I highly doubt Silkie would be too happy with us bringing him or any of the others here. Magnum Ace 7:59 pm -And there's the reason Magnum said 'no'- Specs 7:59 pm *the dragon glides over to the scrap-dragon, hesitantly trying to imitate the wiggles* Definitely Not Shockwave 7:59 pm ((Canned cheese and crackers: secured.)) Twincast 7:59 pm ((//slides in Toothless 7:59 pm ((will have tea momentarily)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:59 pm ((YOOOOO)) *Soundwave nods to Tarantulas and moves over slightly. There's room, do sit.* Twincast 8:00 pm ((I was just lamenting not having anything to do lmao. so this is good ovo Bull 8:00 pm ((I'm kindof tempted to grabs some chips)) Swoop 8:00 pm *the ratio of dancing to just hopping is starting to tilt pretty heavily towards hopping, the giggles are still rock solid though* Magnum Ace 8:00 pm ((BAAAAY! Twincast 8:00 pm ((HI? Magnum Ace 8:00 pm ((it's Boom Twincast 8:00 pm ((ah, thought so ItsyBitsySpyers 8:00 pm *Laserbeak has taken to clapping her feelers against the floor in time with Swoop's hops.* Magnum Ace 8:00 pm ((hehe, hi! Swoop 8:00 pm *ENDLESSLY ENCOURAGED* Twincast 8:00 pm *casually strides in like he hasn't been gone forever & finds an unoccupied place to sit* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:01 pm *The mouth of his faceplate turns upward in a horrendously stiff smile. He turns away in order to secure some energon treats before the show begins.* Magnum Ace 8:01 pm And I don't think Carl would fare quite as well as me or Bull if he wandered in here ItsyBitsySpyers 8:03 pm *Silent amusement at that smile. Oh, that one's going to be entertaining if they stick around.*

\\WHATCHA MEAN?\\ //He freak out easy or someth-- ah, Pit. Tell me Rewind ain't here.// Tarantulas 8:03 pm *tarantulas will take that seat next to sw, thanks. he's oddly silent - a mix of Too Many People and Heck Yes Spider-Man* Twincast 8:03 pm Well, uh, he IS, but he's recharging--less you wanna wake him. *snickers* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:04 pm *Both twins loudly hiss NO* Twincast 8:04 pm *has several docked right now, nbd* Magnum Ace 8:04 pm He'll probabl-huh? Definitely Not Shockwave 8:04 pm (( Question @Magnum ace and bull-- are you humans or really small robots?)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:04 pm \\IT'S COOL. WE'RE COOL.\\ //Let 'im sleep. Like, a long time.// Magnum Ace 8:05 pm -Who and what just happened?- ((human-ish sized robots Twincast 8:05 pm *continues snickering* Alright, hear ya loud n' clear. He'll stay on the train to sleepy time junction Swoop 8:05 pm *will be a "good" boy so long as he's dancing but, be warned, whoever he ends up next to when the music ends is gonna have a hyped up pterobaby to deal with, take your seats carefully all* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:05 pm (( Gotcha.)) Magnum Ace 8:05 pm ((they're called leaguers because they play sports ItsyBitsySpyers 8:06 pm ((OKAY, WARNINGS: ...I actually forgot to write them down when prescreening this movie cause I got carried away watching. There's violence and blood and some Language, and uhhh. S...piders? I don't remember, y'all.)) Bull 8:06 pm *Bull looks confused, having no clue what was going on* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:06 pm ((Probably some flashing lights at one point.)) Definitely Not Shockwave 8:06 pm (( Spiders? In spider man?????)) (( No way.)) Specs 8:06 pm *the dragon stretches, and gives up on wiggling to go find a seat* You're a better dancer than I am, cousin. Twincast 8:06 pm ((inconcievable! Specs 8:06 pm ((oh no, the humanity! spiders in spiderman)) Magnum Ace 8:07 pm -who's the new mech, and why were Frenzy and Rumble hissing at him?- Twincast 8:07 pm ((but I shall return shortly with snackage ovo ItsyBitsySpyers 8:07 pm ((all right, we'll start it soon as you're back or after three min, whichever's first)) Toothless 8:07 pm *purrs at fuzzydragon and looks for a perch itself* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:07 pm *Hm. He doesn't know what to think about this music, or the humans on screen. Is one of them....nothing but protoform?* *Befuddling.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:08 pm *Frenzy shakes his helm and speaks to the two Leaguers in a stage whisper that doesn't get lower than a hoarse shout.*

\\DON'T WORRY 'BOUT NOTHIN'. BRO DON'T LIKE THAT MECH'S PALS IS ALL.\\ Bull 8:09 pm Oh... Magnum Ace 8:09 pm Ah...I guess that's a reason... Twincast 8:09 pm ((BACK ((with doritos Magnum Ace 8:10 pm ((wb Specs 8:10 pm ((doritos. delicious)) Toothless 8:10 pm *happy meeps* Twincast 8:10 pm Aw, but you like one'a them ItsyBitsySpyers 8:11 pm \\YUP.\\ *Grins.* Twincast 8:11 pm Also recharging, by the by. Tried to wake'm but he was out cold Swoop 8:11 pm *is ABSOLUTELY incapable of going from dancing around everywhere to sitting quietly and THROWS himself backwards over a nearby couch to claim his spot with ZERO checking to see who is there* ((who wants to be a pancake lol)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:11 pm \\'S COOL. I'LL GET 'IM LATER, HEH.\\ Specs 8:12 pm *if you listen closely, you can hear an undignified squawk from a dragon that just got clotheslined by a wing and launched to the floor* ((specsdragon is pancake)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:12 pm [[What was that?]] *Zoop. Feeler up to inspect scene.* Swoop 8:12 pm *squeals and thrashes around when he lands on someone* KEHHEHEHHHEHHH ((dude fuck that guy)) Specs 8:13 pm *the dragon is not laughing. the dragon is now a fur rug.* Oh. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:13 pm //Haha!// Definitely Not Shockwave 8:13 pm *He curiously observes Soundwave's feeler-- the "gem" on his forehead flashing for a brief second.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:14 pm *While the first one moves to scoop Swoop off the dragon, the second slithers out to peek at that 'gem'. The claws turn from side to side before it settles into a coil.* Twincast 8:14 pm *oh, this don't ever end well--what with humans keepin' alien tech* Swoop 8:14 pm *SQUEALS happily when he's suddenly in the air* Magnum Ace 8:14 pm -doesn't like where this is going- Specs 8:14 pm *the fur rug piteously slides off the couch and onto the floor* ...Hi... Swoop... Swoop 8:15 pm *points at the screen* LOOOK LOOK Bird *cackles and kicks his feet in the air* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:15 pm {{Him got Bird alternate wing. Bird likes.}} Toothless 8:15 pm ((screms at the music)) Tarantulas 8:15 pm *tarantulas is quietly screm at music too, totally IC* Magnum Ace 8:15 pm -Right, time for him and Bull to get off the floor before unfortunate things happen to them- ItsyBitsySpyers 8:16 pm *The twins offer hands up. It's safe up with them.* Swoop 8:16 pm *holds soundwave's feeler becasue he wants to stay in the air* Him got wings. Big big! Bird wings. Like! Like! *flicks his wings open* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:16 pm *Soundwave lifts Swoop higher. No wings in the way, Dinobot.* Specs 8:16 pm *the dragon accepts that offer! have a fluffy friend, twins. she's not leaving your arms for a while* Twincast 8:17 pm *heh, he missed all this fun* Swoop 8:17 pm *THERE IS NO DOWNSIDE to this* KEHHEHAHAHAH Bull 8:17 pm *while still not liking heights Bull accepts so he doesn't need to worry about being stepped on* Thanks Magnum Ace 8:17 pm -will take that offer up- Thanks Definitely Not Shockwave 8:17 pm *The spectacle with swoop is rather distracting. That is, until he feels as if he's being watched. He turns his helm in the direction of the other feeler.* Specs 8:17 pm ((get off vine, pete)) Swoop 8:19 pm *kicks his feet in the air purely for entertainment purposes* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:19 pm *It clicks the claws at Longarm. Soundwave is, for the record, still looking at the screen.*

//Yeah, no prob.// Toothless 8:20 pm (( oh for pity's sake hug him, Tony )) Swoop 8:20 pm Bird bird bird ItsyBitsySpyers 8:21 pm {{What?}} Toothless 8:21 pm *wiggling to music again* Swoop 8:21 pm Hi : > ItsyBitsySpyers 8:21 pm {{Hello. Neheh.}} Swoop 8:22 pm Me Swoop UP Specs 8:22 pm *the dragon would grin at the scrapdragon, but she's too busy being a furry decoration on someone's arm* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:22 pm *Longarm's faceplate blinks rapidly, glancing between Sounwave and the end of the feeler. Well, if he's going to be like that....He extends one of his arms along the floor, careful not to bump into anyone, and waves his fingers toward the snapping claw.* Swoop 8:22 pm *pulls his legs up under him so he is more up* Tarantulas 8:22 pm *tarantulas is totally bouncing just a tiiiiiny bit in his seat. there's been like two seconds of spider content and he's already jazzed* Magnum Ace 8:23 pm ((made an attempt to hack up own lungs there Twincast 8:23 pm (( pats? 8c Magnum Ace 8:23 pm ((my bad Swoop 8:23 pm *doesn't have the self-awareness or attention span to see peter being him @bird* *instead he's trying to see if he can lean backwards enough to flip upside down* Twincast 8:26 pm 'sat really the best place, pete? ItsyBitsySpyers 8:26 pm *Fascinating. He's always wanted to see one of the arms doing that up close. Longarm should probably take the limb back, though. If he leaves it there much longer, Soundwave's going to start inspecting the surface to find out how the outer construction differs from his.*

((*puts your lungs where they go*)) *He's also going to set Swoop down at last. He's not a jungle gym.*

@Tarantulas: (txt): This, your ability? Swoop 8:27 pm KEHEHHHh Him go *makes PCHOO noises and throws his arms up over his head* Magnum Ace 8:27 pm ((thaaaanks Twincast 8:28 pm (side note: I hate this song. gym teacher in grade school played it every day. for years. w h y) Swoop 8:28 pm KAHAHAH SPLAT Tarantulas 8:28 pm *poking his claws together at the tech, glances at sw*

@SW: ::Which - which ability?:: ItsyBitsySpyers 8:29 pm @T: (txt): Swinging. ... Also, that. Bull 8:29 pm He's... over ambitious. *has seen that end badly in some cases* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:30 pm //Jus' a li'l bit.// Specs 8:30 pm *softly* Best not to take on a sea serpent when you're small. Definitely Not Shockwave 8:30 pm *Though he's just as curious as Soundwave is, if not moreso, he retracts his arm for now. They aren't quite at that level yet. Perhaps another time, though.* Swoop 8:30 pm ZAP!! *kicks& Definitely Not Shockwave 8:30 pm *He's interested in the technology of this movie, anyways.* Swoop 8:30 pm ** Magnum Ace 8:31 pm That ended badly Bull 8:31 pm Yeah ItsyBitsySpyers 8:31 pm *A wise move. He wouldn't allow it in return, himself, yet.* *Next thing you know everyone's going to have feelers.* Tarantulas 8:32 pm @SW: ::I CAN, yes, swinging and standing sideways. Among other things:: *definitely sounds distracted* Twincast 8:32 pm *has feelers* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:32 pm *SEE.* Magnum Ace 8:32 pm He's trying to do too much Twincast 8:32 pm *will keep them to himself, though* Magnum Ace 8:32 pm -has been the one to DO that- ItsyBitsySpyers 8:32 pm @T: (txt): ...Request: Demonstrate, later. *Rumble facepalms. That's not how you keep a secret.* Swoop 8:33 pm *picks at the biolight on Soundwave's feeler* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:34 pm *Let go of that. He set you down. He wants that back.* Swoop 8:34 pm :V ???? Tarantulas 8:34 pm @SW: ::Tsk, you've got quite a few demonstrations you're expecting of me.:: Swoop 8:35 pm *scampers to grab goodies, going straight over the nearest couch and anyone else in the path* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:35 pm @T: (txt): Returns offered. *Look at that. Aren't you glad you're off the floor now, Ace and Bull?* Magnum Ace 8:35 pm -VERY- Twincast 8:35 pm *oof* Bull 8:35 pm *oh yes* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:36 pm ((Hey, Tara, have you checked your discord?)) Twincast 8:36 pm *Swoop hasn't changed a bit, he sees* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:36 pm *If Twincast is the one who got run over, Rumble's gonna snicker.* Tarantulas 8:36 pm *DIES* Twincast 8:36 pm *Lil bit* *he's cool* Tarantulas 8:36 pm *DIES A THOUSAND DEATHS* Swoop 8:36 pm *stuffs an actual fistful of treats in his mouth before scooping up multiple bowls and dashing towards Bird* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:36 pm *Soundwave bobs gently at the eggs line and pings Tarantulas.* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:36 pm (("Do you lay eggs?")) Tarantulas 8:36 pm *he actually physically cringed* Specs 8:37 pm *lifts her head to vaguely look in Tarantula's direction, but says nothing at seeing the cringe* Tarantulas 8:37 pm *double ping at sw for "shut up"* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:38 pm *Bird already has her feelers out for the snacks. 😄 *

*Soundwave accepts the admonition and carries on watching.* //Aw, Primus. He got less tact than you, Frenzy.//

\\GET DENTED.\\ Swoop 8:38 pm *gives her a whole bowl* Swoop 8:38 pm *hops in place* Bull 8:38 pm *face palms* ... Swoop 8:38 pm *still working on chewin his way through his current mouthful* Magnum Ace 8:39 pm -trying to muffle most of his laughter. It doesn't work well- Bull 8:40 pm *can't help but wonder if Ruri has to deal with awkward teenage human stuff* Specs 8:40 pm *the dragon actually cackles at this. oh, Goddess.* Swoop 8:41 pm *has literally made that exact face at Laserbeak tonight* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:41 pm *As someone who also has more than one identity, he finds this "Peter Parker"'s actions to be....of a highly amateur nature.* Magnum Ace 8:41 pm -Teenage stuff and publicity- ItsyBitsySpyers 8:42 pm \\OOH. LOOKS LIKE ENERGON.\\ Specs 8:42 pm It does! Swoop 8:42 pm kehehhehh Definitely Not Shockwave 8:42 pm *Ah. So the human isn't a *complete* moron.* Magnum Ace 8:42 pm Energon? Swoop 8:42 pm him run ItsyBitsySpyers 8:42 pm ((they FINALLY had him be somewhere without stuff to swing on i love it so much)) Swoop 8:43 pm ((i lost it the first time i saw that)) Specs 8:43 pm Energon. Blue, glowing, and explosive. *the dragon waves one bandaged forepaw for emphasis* Wear protection when cooking with it. Magnum Ace 8:43 pm You mean the stuff in the crystals that one time? ItsyBitsySpyers 8:43 pm //DAMN I like that fleshie's style.// Specs 8:43 pm Yes, yes I do. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:44 pm //The punchin' one.// Bull 8:44 pm That does not sound safe to be around,, let alone 'cook'. Swoop 8:44 pm *actually jumps he's laughing so hard at spiderman getting thrown around* Tarantulas 8:44 pm *a tiny giggle. the kiddo's so precious* Swoop 8:44 pm *has no idea what he's watching but loves slapstick always* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:44 pm \\IT AIN'T, BUT 'S WHAT WE EAT.\\ *Shrug* Magnum Ace 8:44 pm ...how explosive? Definitely Not Shockwave 8:45 pm *This movie has much more slapstick than anticipated.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:45 pm \\...JUS' DON'T SET NO FIRES IN HERE. OR SHOOT NOTHIN'.\\ Specs 8:45 pm *the dragon winces* VERY explosive. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:46 pm \\ALL I'M SAYIN'.\\ Magnum Ace 8:46 pm ....... Swoop 8:46 pm *actually SCREAMS he's laughing so hard* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:46 pm {{Haha! You Swoop do!}} Magnum Ace 8:46 pm -should he be worried?- Swoop 8:46 pm him CATCH Bull 8:46 pm .... *is so happy GZ isn't there* Twincast 8:46 pm Nice catch. not'a great landin' though Swoop 8:47 pm *flails like Katya he's so entertained by an onscreen Swoop* Magnum Ace 8:47 pm -GZ would have shot first, and then maybe questioned later- Swoop 8:47 pm BIrd bird bird It swoop Him swoop ItsyBitsySpyers 8:47 pm *...That heater looks handy.* Swoop 8:47 pm Catch and DROP Tarantulas 8:48 pm *sideeye* ...If you ever do that to me, Swoop, I will END you. Definitely Not Shockwave 8:48 pm *He's highly amused by this exchange.* Swoop 8:48 pm Me Swoop CAN do! *hops in place* Yah! Yah! CATCH! Specs 8:49 pm *the dragon removes one paw from over her eyes* Are they done with drowning people yet? Swoop 8:49 pm *scampers over to Tara, spilling goodies in the process* Look look Tarantulas 8:51 pm Look at /what/. *super wary* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:51 pm *He sits up a little straighter at "the Shocker".* Magnum Ace 8:51 pm -this movie is just a string of bad ideas- Definitely Not Shockwave 8:51 pm *Looks away from the screen and forcibly relaxes his posture.* Swoop 8:52 pm *hops onto the arm of the couch, setting the candy bowl on his knees* Look him got wings like Me Swoop! Him good, kehhehh, at CATCH! 😮 Magnum Ace 8:52 pm !!!! ItsyBitsySpyers 8:52 pm //Holy frag.// Swoop 8:52 pm HIm burn DEAD guy too!! Bull 8:52 pm ....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Twincast 8:52 pm Uh Specs 8:52 pm Goddess preserve us. Swoop 8:52 pm Like Dinobot : > Toothless 8:52 pm *whines* Twincast 8:52 pm Good job, mech. Killed one'a your subordinates. Always works well *ask Silas* Magnum Ace 8:53 pm -alarmed straightened posture at that- Bull 8:53 pm *Bull Armor's horns clicked up before he forces them back down* Definitely Not Shockwave 8:55 pm *He's....confused by the sudden attention of the two minibot sized mechs, but he simply notes it and focuses back on the film.* Magnum Ace 8:56 pm ((the film just startled Ace and Bull Swoop 8:56 pm *hops up just high enough to kick his legs out in front of him so he's sitting on the couch arm with his legs kicked out in front of him* *stuffs goodies in his face* Twincast 8:56 pm *likes the teacher* Swoop 8:57 pm There a bird in HERE kehhehehhhh Tarantulas 8:58 pm *nudges swoop out of his personal space. watch those legs* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:58 pm {{Noooo. There THE Bird here.}} *Preen preen.* Swoop 8:58 pm *nudges back* THE Bird Tarantulas 8:59 pm *heavy squint and a slight puuuuush sideways with a spider leg* Magnum Ace 8:59 pm -Peter. They have several teammates who tried stupid stunts without being prepared. It didn't end well- Swoop 8:59 pm *snickers and holds onto the spider leg with his birby foot* Definitely Not Shockwave 9:00 pm (( Aren't all of Tara's legs spider legs? I imagined him sticking out his leggy real far.)) Twincast 9:01 pm (( >just realised that "Tara" = "Tarantulas" and not a character in the film ItsyBitsySpyers 9:01 pm ((LOL)) Definitely Not Shockwave 9:01 pm (( He's in the film....In spirit.)) Tarantulas 9:01 pm *tara's definitely using the spider leg to pluck swoop up and drop him mostly gently on the ground* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:01 pm *Bob-laughing again.* Swoop 9:01 pm *cackles* Tarantulas 9:01 pm (( tara WISHES he were in the film Twincast 9:02 pm (( make your own spider film, tarantulas Swoop 9:02 pm Again! Definitely Not Shockwave 9:02 pm ((He just needs an entire movie based on himself.)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:02 pm \\PROBABLY SHOULDA LEFT IT ON.\\ Tarantulas 9:02 pm (( ...he's got small ones but that's a different story Magnum Ace 9:02 pm -facepalms- Bull 9:02 pm *did not like the 'insta kill' option and can't help a twitch* Magnum Ace 9:03 pm -yeah, he's ignoring THAT one- Swoop 9:03 pm *reaches for a tara's leg again* You Spiderbot pick up Me Swoop again! !! Tarantulas 9:03 pm *he's not even saying anything, just picking swoop up and holding him there* Swoop 9:03 pm *yaaaayyy!* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:04 pm *Soundwave perks slightly. He wants... whatever that is.* Twincast 9:04 pm Havin' fun over there? Swoop 9:04 pm *is off the ground through NO effort of his own and is watching a kickass flier, this is THE BEST movie night* Tarantulas 9:04 pm *so long as swoop leaves him ALONE he'll hold him there* Swoop 9:05 pm KONK! Kehheheh. Him hit head. Specs 9:05 pm *the dragon winces at that. that's gotta hurt* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:05 pm //Pff.// ItsyBitsySpyers 9:06 pm *Soundwave can 100% see Tarantulas doing these things. All of them.* *And Liz is Prowl.* Tarantulas 9:06 pm *if that was directed at tara, twincast, he's totally absorbed in the film, sry* (( omfg soundwave. truth Twincast 9:07 pm *It's all good* Twincast 9:07 pm *mostly a rhetorical question anyway* Swoop 9:07 pm *eats some treats* *chucks one over to Bird* .... ItsyBitsySpyers 9:08 pm *GOBBLE GOBBLE* Swoop 9:08 pm *sets one on tara's head* Definitely Not Shockwave 9:08 pm *Hooo boy. * ItsyBitsySpyers 9:08 pm [[...Ah. He sees where this is going.]] Tarantulas 9:08 pm *picks the treat up with a spider limb and eats it as subtly as someone with a monster mouth can* Swoop 9:08 pm *can't see anything at this angle anyhoo* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:08 pm *Tries NOT to watch that.* Swoop 9:09 pm *also, SHARING* Definitely Not Shockwave 9:09 pm *He glances just in time to see Tara eating. That's......Hm.* Swoop 9:09 pm *is a good dino, an okay dino, a passible dino* Definitely Not Shockwave 9:10 pm (( "hm" is code for "very attractive")) Tarantulas 9:10 pm *you're not getting a pat on the head for that, swoop* Bull 9:10 pm That's not good. Swoop 9:10 pm *as long as tara keeps him in the air, he's good* Him climb Flier better ItsyBitsySpyers 9:11 pm {{Bird get there fast fast.}} Swoop 9:11 pm Bird get EVERYWHERE fast fast Tarantulas 9:11 pm *AHH* Magnum Ace 9:11 pm No, it's not Definitely Not Shockwave 9:11 pm (( Oh that's so cute.)) (( I"m dying.)_) Magnum Ace 9:12 pm -Is Bull okay with the angle of the movie?- Swoop 9:12 pm Oh him have deployer mini FLY spider Specs 9:12 pm This is why you want wings, spider human. Swoop 9:12 pm *waggles his wings like the borbs int he movie* Bull 9:13 pm *Bull has been adverting his optics away from the heights* Tarantulas 9:13 pm He - I THINK he ought to have webbing that functions as such - Swoop 9:13 pm Helicopter fight spiderman Magnum Ace 9:13 pm -placing a steady hand on Bull's shoulder- Tarantulas 9:13 pm See!!! *tara's so excited right now* Twincast 9:14 pm ((OW Swoop 9:14 pm OH good jump! Swoop 9:14 pm Kehehhehh bad DOORS Tarantulas 9:15 pm *suddenly remembers when he did this to prowl. almost let him drop. shit. oops* Specs 9:15 pm ((karen PLEASE)) Bull 9:15 pm *is having none of the heights* Swoop 9:15 pm KEHEHHHhe FALL ItsyBitsySpyers 9:15 pm *Finding Tarantulas' excitement most entertaining. It seems this was a good choice of film.* Magnum Ace 9:15 pm There. I think it's over now, Bull. Bull 9:16 pm *looks back to the screen* Swoop 9:16 pm What high altitude seal do? Tarantulas 9:16 pm He could go higher, of /course/ Swoop 9:16 pm *simultaneously imagines a military mission and a flying seal, that's not less likely than his family* ((NOT AGAIN)) Specs 9:17 pm ((NOT AGAIN)) Twincast 9:17 pm ((damn Definitely Not Shockwave 9:17 pm (( How can *you* show your spider spirit?)) Tarantulas 9:17 pm (( Become A Spide Definitely Not Shockwave 9:18 pm (( Ah. I see. So the answer is Science.)) Swoop 9:18 pm *holds a treat down for tara* Definitely Not Shockwave 9:18 pm (( Anybody here ready to become a cyborg? Do I have any takers?)) Swoop 9:18 pm ((i ove her)) Twincast 9:18 pm ((same tbh Tarantulas 9:18 pm *takes and eats treat. noms* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:18 pm ((the little cap announcements kill me)) Swoop 9:19 pm *grabs a few treats and lobs them at Bird at once, it'll work itself out* Magnum Ace 9:19 pm ((at least no one is offering the leaguers snacks again ItsyBitsySpyers 9:19 pm [[Not one word.]] Swoop 9:20 pm *chews over the words* Enhanced Interrogation Protocol Twincast 9:20 pm *Soundy, its you* *this is now his mindvoice for you( * ItsyBitsySpyers 9:21 pm *HOW DARE* Tarantulas 9:21 pm (( thank u for the new headcanon Twincast 9:21 pm (( YW Specs 9:22 pm ((peter PLEASE)) Swoop 9:22 pm Him stick to car Definitely Not Shockwave 9:22 pm ((How much longer is this film?)) Swoop 9:22 pm *observant* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:22 pm ((bout an hour)) Definitely Not Shockwave 9:23 pm (( Wow. This movie is much longer than anticipated.)) Twincast 9:23 pm (( ^^^ Magnum Ace 9:23 pm ((yeah Swoop 9:23 pm ((this movie is so good. It's jam packed without feeling like they are just throwing shit at you)) Magnum Ace 9:23 pm ((it's fun Swoop 9:23 pm Instant Kill :V Definitely Not Shockwave 9:23 pm (( I'm in college, so. I'll bop out for now, it was a pleasure getting to do one of these again, though.)) Swoop 9:23 pm ((bye!)) Magnum Ace 9:23 pm ((g'night! Twincast 9:23 pm (( byee! Tarantulas 9:23 pm (( niiiight! Bull 9:23 pm ((Bye ItsyBitsySpyers 9:23 pm ((all right! get some sleep, come back any time 😄 you know you're welcome!)) Swoop 9:24 pm Spi-dur guyyyyy Specs 9:24 pm ((night!)) Swoop 9:25 pm KAHAHAHAH !!! AWESOME *DOUBLE FIST PUMP* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:25 pm *She has GOT to get upgraded like her Tyran self.* Swoop 9:26 pm *would lose his MIND if Bird had wings like that <3 * Magnum Ace 9:26 pm -might have tapped Bull on the shoulder as a warning- Tarantulas 9:26 pm *is disliking birds more and more as the movie progresses* Specs 9:26 pm Oh dear. Magnum Ace 9:26 pm -Time to start looking at anywhere but the screen buddy- Swoop 9:26 pm boat DEAD Bull 9:27 pm *groans as he avoids watching the screen* Swoop 9:27 pm pzzchoo! ItsyBitsySpyers 9:27 pm \\THEY BETTER GET LIKE THEM CLOWN KIDS 'N START FLOATIN'.\\ Tarantulas 9:28 pm *smol whimper* I'm so glad he's getting better at this Specs 9:28 pm I hope they remember to watch their tails. It would hurt to lose pieces to those lasers. Tarantulas 9:28 pm ...Scratch that Swoop 9:28 pm Boat DEEEADDDD ItsyBitsySpyers 9:28 pm *Soundwave tilts his helm.*

@T: (txt): You are concerned for the humans? Swoop 9:28 pm Oh. HIm arms rip out, kehehheh. Specs 9:28 pm Human dead too. Human is going to be bisected. Or not! Tarantulas 9:29 pm @SW: ::Hyeh, an odd question to ask.:: Magnum Ace 9:29 pm -Taps again. Safe now- Tarantulas 9:29 pm @SW: ::I - sure. Not in general though.:: ItsyBitsySpyers 9:30 pm @T: (txt): Whimper heard. What reason, if not human safety? Bull 9:30 pm Why does this movie have so much to do with heights? *he groans and mutters to himself* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:30 pm //Most the superheroin' movies do.// Bull 9:30 pm *groans* Swoop 9:30 pm *little kicky feet* them AIR fight now??? Tarantulas 9:31 pm Don't kick your feet or I'll drop you. *hiss* Swoop 9:31 pm No drop Magnum Ace 9:31 pm -pats- I guess that's half the fun of these movies? Swoop 9:32 pm ((his clothes just EAT him in every shot)) Bull 9:32 pm I prefer staying on the ground. *is no where near flight capable and doesn't want to be* Tarantulas 9:32 pm @SW: ::I... what did you say?:: *forgot* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:33 pm @T: Repeat: Whimper heard. What reason, if not human safety? {{It air not for all mech. Only good fly, brave. Like Bird.}} Swoop 9:33 pm Brave Bird : > ItsyBitsySpyers 9:33 pm {{You stay grounding. That safe.}} Swoop 9:34 pm *is actively in the air right now, as long as you ignore the giant spider* Magnum Ace 9:34 pm -has gotten airborn several times, so he's fine with heights- Tarantulas 9:34 pm @SW: ::Oh, well - particular instances of sentience are important. If you haven't noticed, I'm a bit invested. Hyeh.:: Twincast 9:35 pm *flier present~ jet, but not seeker* Swoop 9:35 pm ((omg that surprised face)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:36 pm *That's still very weird to him. All the Blasters (because this is the only Twincast he knows) were cars and music machines of different kinds.*

@T: (txt): ...Concern target: spider human? Success desired? //Aw, they're bein' mushy.//

\\GROSS.\\ Tarantulas 9:36 pm *tiny happy noises* Swoop 9:37 pm Them dancing Specs 9:37 pm *the dragon snickers* Is this normal human parenting? Toothless 9:37 pm *chittersnorts* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:37 pm [[He would not know. He is neither a human nor a parent.]] \\NO FRAGGIN' WAY!\\ Specs 9:37 pm ((DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN)) Twincast 9:37 pm *happy to be weird, slendy* Bull 9:38 pm I wonder if Edmond would know... *probably would know more than Richard would... considering* Tarantulas 9:38 pm *swears in old cybertronian* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:38 pm {{Oooooo, naughty mouth.}} *Cacklechatter* Magnum Ace 9:38 pm -Richard is...uh...not a stellar example- Swoop 9:38 pm *laughs because bird is laughing but cocks his head in confusion* Tarantulas 9:38 pm *hiss, at least he used a different language* Swoop 9:38 pm *something is funny* *but he dont know what* Specs 9:39 pm *the dragon cranes her neck to consider Bull* Oh, you know humans? Bull 9:39 pm Yeah, one is our coach. he would probably know a bit about human parenting. Specs 9:40 pm *the dragon chirps a little, interested* Is it true that humans don't have creches? Magnum Ace 9:41 pm Depends Swoop 9:41 pm *shoves the last handful of treats in his mouth and, while he chews, flips the bowl up so he can look at it, face to bowl* *gonna make V sure it's empty* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:41 pm ((oh dear we lost the spide)) Swoop 9:41 pm ((swoop fell on he head)) Specs 9:41 pm ((someone set up the spide signal)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:42 pm ((love me the lighting change there)) Bull 9:42 pm Creches? *Bull doesn't recognize that word* Specs 9:43 pm Where I come from, the eggs are all hatched in clutches around the same time. The hatchlings are then raised communally, in what we call creches. We all learn basic skills, reading, writing, sums, flying, and so on. Then when we're older, we apprentice out. Swoop 9:44 pm *puts the bowl on his face* *is ready for a fight now plz* Twincast 9:44 pm ((afk for a sec Bull 9:44 pm Humans don't have that; that I know of. Magnum Ace 9:44 pm Daycare is close, but probably not what you're looking for. Tarantulas 9:45 pm (( WHAT DID I MISS Swoop 9:45 pm *drops the bowl behind the couch, mission complete* Tarantulas 9:45 pm (( MY WIFI DIED Specs 9:45 pm ((I actually saw this movie with my dad, and I had to tell him that if he gave my date a "dad talk" and my date bailed on me, I would absolutely assume that he'd threatened the poor dude with death. poor liz)) Bull 9:45 pm *wonders if Ruri being raised around Silkie and the others would count* Swoop 9:45 pm ((borb dad threatened boy spide)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:45 pm ((wb - liz spilled enough beans her dad figured out who parker is; she went inside and her dad told him you can either go inside and forget everything that's happened and never interfere again or i kill you and everyone you love)) Tarantulas 9:45 pm (( well shit ItsyBitsySpyers 9:45 pm ((he just bailed on her at the dance and now we're here)) Swoop 9:46 pm him HIT bus 😮 Specs 9:46 pm *the dragon tilts her head* Daycare. *she sounds out the word carefully* So the biological parents take care of the children, normally? How do they know if the parents can raise hatchlings, then? Swoop 9:46 pm Me swoop want ROLL bus.... Magnum Ace 9:47 pm Um... Bull 9:47 pm I don't know. All I know is what Silkie and the others have shared. Our coach isn't really a dad; more so, he raised his brother's daughter ItsyBitsySpyers 9:48 pm //It's like drivin' with you.// \\I SAID GET DENTED.\\ Swoop 9:48 pm ((slendy ur the guy in the chair 😄 )) Specs 9:48 pm Fair enough! I'm just curious. I haven't really met other humans from the multiverse, so I don't know how they work. *the dragon laughs* Maybe too curious. That's what the docents said. Swoop 9:49 pm KAHH!! Him SLIIIIIIDE ItsyBitsySpyers 9:49 pm *Frenzy howls himself right off the couch seat* Tarantulas 9:50 pm (( can tara still be holding swoop even tho i blinked out, heh Swoop 9:50 pm wings ((yis)) Tarantulas 9:50 pm (( good Swoop 9:50 pm ((swoop will complain LOUDLY whenever he has to go back on the ground)) ((ground is for nerds)) Magnum Ace 9:50 pm Well, I doubt Coach would be a good example Bull 9:50 pm We're around humans almost all the time. From on the field, in public or in the repair bay. Magnum Ace 9:51 pm Or in studios Bull 9:51 pm Better than some. *Bull points out remembering that Giroti is a 'father'* Tarantulas 9:51 pm *tarantulas has twice switched spider legs holding the ptero. swoop might be light but he's still substantial enough* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:51 pm //I like this flyin' human. He knows what's up.// Magnum Ace 9:51 pm -and elbows Bull. Hush you- Swoop 9:51 pm !!!!! Bird! Look 😮 Bird Birdbirdbirdbird Bull 9:52 pm Oh, no... Please; no more flying. *is ready to look away again* Swoop 9:52 pm DEAD Kehehehhehhh Specs 9:52 pm *the dragon looks at the screen, at Laserbeak, and back at the screen* Magnum Ace 9:52 pm ...... ItsyBitsySpyers 9:52 pm {{What you dragon want?}} Specs 9:52 pm Can you do that? Swoop 9:52 pm Bird bird you look! See? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:53 pm {{Peh. Easy.}}

{{Bird faster~}} Swoop 9:53 pm *is a wiggle in tara's grip, an excited wiggle, not a I want down wiggle* Tarantulas 9:53 pm StoP WIGGLING *snaps* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:53 pm *Soundwave fidgets slightly.* Specs 9:53 pm *the dragon looks suitably impressed* Awesome. But of course you're faster, I should have known. *flattery and treats gets dragons everywhere, don't you know* Swoop 9:53 pm *pats tara's head* you see? it bird. Not BIRD bird. Like bird. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm {{Is okay. You knowing now.}} Swoop 9:54 pm *looks at the screen at the buried Peter freakout* Oh. Him bury. Windchill 9:54 pm *Appears at precisely the wrong moment.* Swoop 9:54 pm Him Slag no like THIS movie, kehheh, bury movie. Or bury REAL. Windchill 9:54 pm ... ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm {{Him scared of bury?}} Magnum Ace 9:55 pm -That is one strong human- Swoop 9:55 pm Yah Because Him bury ItsyBitsySpyers 9:55 pm *Casually takes the note.* Windchill 9:55 pm *He's gonna find a place to sit on the floor and not think about being buried alive.* Swoop 9:55 pm Sludge and Grimlock bury too Me Swoop and HIm Snarl not bury Autobots never bury Swoop Bull 9:55 pm *is now looking away; noping at the heights* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:55 pm *....He wants those.* Tarantulas 9:55 pm *mutters something about the other side always having the better tech* *wait wrong side* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:56 pm {{Them Grimlock, Sludge hating bury too?}} Windchill 9:56 pm That cloaking is...not the greatest. Magnum Ace 9:56 pm -yeah, uh, don't look, period, Bull- Swoop 9:56 pm OH! Wings seal on. For stick Specs 9:56 pm *the dragon turns to bull, trying to help distract him from the heights* So, you only know the one parent human? Out of all the ones you know? Swoop 9:57 pm Bird 😮 ItsyBitsySpyers 9:57 pm {{...It look like Bird.}} Swoop 9:57 pm *loves this movie and also loves Bird* <3 Yah! It Bird :V Windchill 9:57 pm *Opens his mouth...and shuts it. He's seen this movie already.* Bull 9:58 pm Well, technically no. There are two others; though I wouldn't put Giroti up for any 'dad of the year' awards. And Richard's situation is complicated to say the least. Tarantulas 9:58 pm *if u spoil something tara will murder u, windchill* Swoop 9:58 pm that jet not invisible Mirage invisible Windchill 9:58 pm *He pointedly avoided spoiling anything.* Swoop 9:58 pm OH! Wing in propeller. Specs 9:58 pm "Dad" awards. Docents get awards for raising children? *the dragon tilts her head* Magnum Ace 9:58 pm -not even trying to hide his snort of laughter- ItsyBitsySpyers 9:59 pm {{Him Ravage say Mirage invisible, still smelly. Neheheh.}} Swoop 9:59 pm *even the normally empathy free dino winces and pulls his wings a bit closer* Me Swoop kehehhehhhh Me Swoop never SMELLING Mirage Windchill 9:59 pm Man. We should all get wings upgraded like that. But. Windchill 9:59 pm Better. Bull 9:59 pm It's something they usually give as presents on mugs and stuff. *he had seen one of the doctors in the hospital have one on his desk one time* Windchill 9:59 pm And by us I mean me. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:59 pm //Whirl kinda got the rotor things, don't he?// Windchill 10:00 pm Yeah...but he doesn't quite have wings. Specs 10:00 pm Oh. *the dragon mulls over this information* So it's an acknowledgement of skill, provided by other docents? Magnum Ace 10:00 pm It's the children expressing gratitude to their father Tarantulas 10:00 pm *is sitting on the edge of the couch, totally not biting on a claw* Windchill 10:00 pm I don't care about the rotors anyway, I care about smashing things to bits with them. Swoop 10:00 pm CRASH!!! ItsyBitsySpyers 10:00 pm \\OHHH YOU WANT THE CUTTIN' STUFF BITS.\\ Windchill 10:00 pm Hell yeah. Specs 10:00 pm Ah, I see. *that seems more sensible* Humans don't seem to express gratitude by bringing prey home to the object of their gratitude. Magnum Ace 10:01 pm -taps again, they're on the ground now- ItsyBitsySpyers 10:01 pm *Rumble smacks his cube down.*

//How the FRAG'd the meatbag survive that?// Windchill 10:01 pm He's...like a spider? Swoop 10:01 pm KAH! Him swooping again Magnum Ace 10:01 pm No they tend to bring other gifts Windchill 10:01 pm Spiders don't die when you drop 'em. Bull 10:01 pm No. They don't. *now looks back up* Tarantulas 10:01 pm Th-they - it depends on the spider. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:02 pm *This movie really is basically Swoop vs. Tarantulas, isn't it.* Windchill 10:02 pm *Pretty sure Spiderboy lacks an exoskeleton though so there's really no explanation.* Swoop 10:02 pm STOMP! Kehehehhh Oh, him pick up with wing Specs 10:02 pm *the dragon is too busy asking questions of the Leaguers to ask Tarantulas about that* Huh. How many children do humans usually have, anyways? Windchill 10:02 pm Like, wing-hands. I want it. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:02 pm *One of Soundwave's feelers gently taps the spide.* Swoop 10:02 pm *flexes the digits on the ends of his wings, probably can't pick someone up with them ..... but it doesn't hurt to try* Magnum Ace 10:03 pm !!!!!! Windchill 10:03 pm I don't want my wings to explode though, heh. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:03 pm {{ 😧 }} Swoop 10:03 pm Me Swoop have wing explode before Windchill 10:03 pm Kinda cool but I think some people wouldn't really appreciate it if I died. Tarantulas 10:03 pm *sw gets a zap of GetOffMe* Bull 10:03 pm I don't know. It seems usually one or two... considering Edmond and Richard are brothers. Though I really don't know. Magnum Ace 10:03 pm -attention is on the movie again- Windchill 10:03 pm Not dead... ItsyBitsySpyers 10:03 pm *It recoils fast. There's a fleeting shred of surprise in the instant between.* Windchill 10:04 pm *A disappointment he knew was coming.* Swoop 10:04 pm Dead? Specs 10:04 pm One or two. That's not a lot... *the dragon chirps contemplatively* Swoop 10:04 pm Not dead Specs 10:04 pm ((I lvoe that fucking note)) Swoop 10:04 pm Him wings dead Specs 10:04 pm Benefits to being organic: my wings have not exploded yet. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:04 pm //That Happy fragger's gonna be lucky he don't get fired.// ItsyBitsySpyers 10:05 pm //Not listenin', 'n losin' the plane, 'n probably some stuff broke.// Windchill 10:05 pm Do they really expect ME to believe that Spiderman limped—or zoope-de-dooped—away from that? Twincast 10:05 pm Kinda ItsyBitsySpyers 10:05 pm \\WELL, YEAH.\\ Windchill 10:05 pm Life...ruined... I don't believe it. Bull 10:06 pm Only one I really know much about their family life is Owner, she's an only child. Windchill 10:06 pm These guys seem like they care a whole lot. ... Swoop 10:07 pm ((she's great)) Windchill 10:07 pm This is creepy. Swoop 10:07 pm ((best mj)) Windchill 10:07 pm Meeting a grown man in the bathroom. Specs 10:07 pm That does not look like "fired" to me. *snickers* Awkward. Swoop 10:07 pm *doesn't get why this is comfortable but recognizes discomfort and giggles* Windchill 10:08 pm The tower was cooler. Because it was tall. Magnum Ace 10:08 pm Owner is also an interesting case herself Specs 10:09 pm *the dragon perks up. more human talk!* Oh? Windchill 10:09 pm ... Toothless 10:09 pm ((omg tony)) Bull 10:09 pm Considering everything, yeah. Windchill 10:10 pm The wing suit is cooler. Tarantulas 10:10 pm *whispering saynosaynosayno* Swoop 10:10 pm *looks down at tara, what is that noise? he doesn't know, he kind of doesn't care, just gonna play with his toes instead* Specs 10:10 pm *the dragon's head tilts, tailtip twitching* "Everything?" Windchill 10:11 pm *Snorts* Bull 10:12 pm *looks back to the dragon* It's complicated, but what I understand is that Owner's father faked his own death so his brother had to raise her... *it was complicated* Magnum Ace 10:12 pm Well, she was basically raised alongside us...uh... -derailed by movie- Windchill 10:12 pm Eheh. Eheheheheh. Specs 10:12 pm *the dragon blinks slowly* That's. Faked his death? I... Oh my. ((ugh I hate this part. Aunt May not knowing is THE THING)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:13 pm //Haha!// Magnum Ace 10:13 pm He got into...a lot of trouble Tarantulas 10:13 pm *snickers hard* Swoop 10:13 pm Why Her mad? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:13 pm ((yes i'm gonna let this go all the way thru credits, there tiny thing at end)) {{Her not know him Spider-Man, not know him do danger thing.}} Tarantulas 10:14 pm *alright, time for swoop to get put down, tarantulas has to stretch out and get rid of all this dramatic tension. plop goes the ptero* Swoop 10:14 pm Danger thing fun ????????? *holds onto tara's leg with both hands* Specs 10:14 pm I can't imagine getting into so much trouble that one would have to fake one's own death. Then again, usually us dragons... deal with problems more directly. I suppose we don't really have a chance to get to "faking" death. Tarantulas 10:14 pm *shakes the leg, off with you* Swoop 10:14 pm *squawks* Magnum Ace 10:14 pm He couldn't, not without endangering Owner, and coach Windchill 10:15 pm *Hand shoots up.* Swoop! Bull 10:15 pm And everyone else. Swoop 10:15 pm What? Windchill 10:15 pm Sit with me now. Tarantulas 10:15 pm Yes, please do Swoop 10:15 pm Me Swoop no want SITTING Windchill 10:15 pm *He SLAMS his fist into his palm with a loud CRACK* Or else. Magnum Ace 10:15 pm Yeah, everyone he knew would be in trouble if he tried to deal with them Swoop 10:15 pm ???? Else? Windchill 10:15 pm Or else you have to sit by yourself? What do you want to do then? Specs 10:16 pm *the dragon looks a little surprised* Going after relatives for the actions of one being? I... Well, I suppose that's pretty alien to me. Toothless 10:16 pm O,o Swoop 10:16 pm Me Swoop dont want sit AND Me Swoop dont want sit aLONE Magnum Ace 10:16 pm I...doubt they would have just stopped with relatives Windchill 10:17 pm Then come do whatever it is you're doing over here. Specs 10:17 pm *the dragon looks VASTLY more surprised at that* Duly noted... Bull 10:17 pm They would have gone after Silkie, Ryuken and the others. Tarantulas 10:17 pm You'll have to hold him up, then, apparently. Let him hang off your arm or something of the sort, Windchill. Windchill 10:17 pm I can do that. I'm big. Almost the biggest. Twincast 10:17 pm *pfffft* Tarantulas 10:17 pm /Please./ Swoop. Swoop 10:17 pm *grabby hands* UP! Windchill 10:18 pm *Snorts.* Did Spiderman go somewhere? Swoop 10:18 pm ((A+ movie)) Magnum Ace 10:18 pm ...yeah. They were quite ruthless Tarantulas 10:18 pm (( don't u mean S+++ for spide Toothless 10:18 pm *claps front paws together and flaps wings* Swoop 10:18 pm ((omg)) Me Swoop want up! Bird bird! Us go flying! Outside! Kehehehhhh not inside flying. Windchill 10:19 pm Okay, bye. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:19 pm *NYOOM she flies to join him* Specs 10:19 pm I suppose the benefit of directness is that we also don't go after those who never harmed us. *the dragon yawns* This was a long one. I should rest. Next time? Swoop 10:19 pm *makes his escape* ((l8r)) Toothless 10:20 pm *then suddently >poofs< back into a scraplet and falls off the shelf with a startled chirr* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:20 pm [[Enjoyed yourself, scraplet?]]

[[Yes, next time.]] Toothless 10:20 pm *NODNODNOD and loud purrs* Bull 10:21 pm Not a bad movie... just didn't care for all the flying and heights. Tarantulas 10:21 pm *flopping back onto the couch. that was So Stressful* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:21 pm *Small nod. Good.*

[[He will remember to keep a small dish of bolts for you next time.]] //Ah, ya get used to it.// \\UNLESS YER RAVAGE.\\ //Heh. He still hates flyin' docked.// Bull 10:22 pm I really don't like flying or heights. Too many bad experiences in the air. Magnum Ace 10:23 pm -nudges. Best to not elaborate on that- Toothless 10:23 pm *sways to music for a few moments, getting comfortable in its own frame again* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:23 pm \\YEAH? LIKE WHAT?\\ Toothless 10:24 pm *chittergiggles* Windchill 10:24 pm *Chinhands.* Twincast 10:25 pm *Don't mind the stray, blue carrier casually opening his own dock & retrieving a happily alt-mode snoozing deployer. Not weird at all* Bull 10:25 pm *shudders* The volleyball deathmatch above the Andes Mountains in that lightning storm against the Deus has to be one of the worst. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:25 pm *Rumble notices movement, glances over... and scrambles to his feet and backward* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:25 pm \\SOUNDS WICKED.\\ Magnum Ace 10:26 pm ...not when it was literally above the mountains. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:26 pm \\...THE PIT'S WRONG WITH YOU?\\ Magnum Ace 10:26 pm And none of us are capable of sustained flight ItsyBitsySpyers 10:26 pm \\OH. ... HOW'D YA GET UP THERE?\\ Twincast 10:26 pm *shh, not that one, rumble* Bull 10:27 pm That was my fault. Didn't think playing a volleyball game would turn so dangerous. Magnum Ace 10:27 pm It's okay, we all trusted them ItsyBitsySpyers 10:27 pm *Rumble collapses with relief against the arm of the couch. Thank Primus.* Twincast 10:27 pm *When Frenzy isn't so occupied with the story, he was gonna offer letting a certain other twin stay. If that's alright with everyone else* Bull 10:28 pm Didn't know the game field would take off into the air. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:28 pm *Soundwave will allow it.* Magnum Ace 10:28 pm And I will be happy if that never happens again ItsyBitsySpyers 10:28 pm //The whole... uh.// *What was the story about? Flying fields?* //The whole field?//

*Nudges Frenzy with a pede and subtly points at snoozing Eject.* Magnum Ace 10:28 pm The whole field Windchill 10:29 pm (( I'm trying to eat and cats are swarming around me send help. )) Toothless 10:29 pm *flies over to land beside smol warm-metal visitors and looks up at them, offers comfort purrs* Bull 10:29 pm No safety rails or anything. Just the field and miles of air beneath us. Magnum Ace 10:29 pm And lighting above us *lightning Toothless 10:30 pm O,O ItsyBitsySpyers 10:30 pm *Frenzy looks over, puzzled - then grins like there was a buy one get one smile sale at the expression store. Thumbs up to Twincast.* Twincast 10:31 pm ((tbh the image y'all should be getting is Twincast handing off a literal like rectangle of a deployer. He'll wake up eventually, but. I gotta go shower n stuff bc I work at midnight ItsyBitsySpyers 10:31 pm ((just leave him on the seat lmfao the twins'll hoist him overhead and carry him upstairs or somethin)) Magnum Ace 10:31 pm ((GOOD LUCK Twincast 10:31 pm ((GOOD. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:31 pm ((i hope work's not too awful)) Twincast 10:32 pm ((I have to ice donuts all night. v tedious ((BUT I WILL talk to y'all laterrr <3 Magnum Ace 10:32 pm ((byyyye Toothless 10:32 pm ((Ni night! Tarantulas 10:32 pm (( niiiiight! Bull 10:32 pm ((Night Toothless 10:32 pm ((all I can hear now is the old "...time to make the donuts" commercial >,< ItsyBitsySpyers 10:33 pm ((pffff)) Magnum Ace 10:33 pm ((nice Tarantulas 10:34 pm *sits up a little. can't stay still for too long after a movie like that. then squints at soundwave* Is there any particular reason for the music choice? It doesn't seem... congruous? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:35 pm [[He did not have time to prepare a list of spider songs.]] Pause. [[And he was in the mood for the instruments used in these.]] Tarantulas 10:35 pm Hyeh, fair enough. Magnum Ace 10:36 pm -pats Bull- At least we know that volleyball is not a sport we want to try again too soon Tarantulas 10:36 pm I don't exactly have a playlist of spider songs myself. *he probably actually does, shh* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:36 pm \\YOU GOTTA GET US FOOTAGE OF THAT GAME. THE VALLEY-BALL. I GOT SOMEONE WHO'S GONNA WANNA SEE.\\ Windchill 10:36 pm *Scratches his chin, thinking about wing upgrades he can't afford.* *But he can DREAM* Magnum Ace 10:37 pm I...don't know if that one was recorded ItsyBitsySpyers 10:37 pm [[He finds that hard to believe.]]

*Laserbeak's gonna be dreaming too, Windchill. You're not alone.* Windchill 10:37 pm *One day, it'll happen. Because the mun was planning on it before this move came out lol.* Bull 10:38 pm Only one twisted enough would be Segal *so hopes the footage doesn't exist* Windchill 10:38 pm What is this mushy stuff? Magnum Ace 10:38 pm We're not asking him ItsyBitsySpyers 10:39 pm [[As he said, he wanted the instruments playing it.]] Windchill 10:39 pm Shameful. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:39 pm ((do i or do i not tease tarantulas in response to windchill)) Windchill 10:40 pm (( Might as well. )) I only like one song. Bull 10:40 pm No; we are not, Tarantulas 10:40 pm (( always tease, although i have no idea how ItsyBitsySpyers 10:40 pm [[No, this would be shameful.]] Windchill 10:40 pm *Two, actually, but they're both...exactly what you'd expect.* I don't have to listen, I can read. Tarantulas 10:41 pm *immediately leans forward and puts his face in his paws without a word* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:41 pm [[All he is doing is playing music with a specific sound.]] Windchill 10:41 pm I've heard worse. If it's not All Star...then it's shameful. Toothless 10:41 pm *worried look at Ceiling-Not-Smol* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:42 pm \\OKAY, WELL, LIKE. NEXT TIME. IF YOU AIN'T GONNA PROBABLY DIE PLAYIN'.\\ Magnum Ace 10:42 pm We hope that's no longer the case Bull 10:43 pm I think we've all gone through too many 'death games' as it is. I'll be happy just to play normal League matches. Windchill 10:43 pm Too many is when you're no longer fazed by it. Magnum Ace 10:43 pm .... Windchill 10:44 pm That's when there's no turning back. But. Magnum Ace 10:44 pm .................. Tarantulas 10:44 pm @SW: ::Hss. Soundwave, where you you even GET these ideas.:: *smol shove with spide leg, with a mental flick along with it* Windchill 10:44 pm It's good to quit early. Magnum Ace 10:44 pm -guess who's shifting uncomfortably again- Bull 10:44 pm .... *looks at Magnum and knows why he looks that way* Windchill 10:45 pm Better to still be scared than no longer care whether you live or DIE. I think. Depends on who you ask. Don't ask Whirl, is what I mean. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:45 pm \\LISTEN. IF YOU AIN'T TEARIN' YOUR SPARK - UH, OR WHATEVER Y'GOT - OUTTA SOMEONE ELSE'S HANDS, YOU AIN'T LIVIN'. YER JUST DYIN' SLOW.\\ Windchill 10:46 pm *Been there, done that, got bored.* Bull 10:46 pm *Now it's Bull's turn to look uncomfortable* N-no...it's not. Magnum Ace 10:46 pm I don't think that's living ItsyBitsySpyers 10:47 pm *Soundwave huffs softly at being shoved and places a small smiley on his visor.*

@T: (txt): Imagination. Windchill 10:47 pm I think it's living...ON THE EDGE. *Dramatic flop onto the floor, ALL ALONE.* Tarantulas 10:48 pm @SW: ::Well, your imagination is completely off base.:: Windchill 10:48 pm There's somethin' wrong with the world today. The light bulb's gettin' dim. Magnum Ace 10:49 pm ...I think it's time for us to go home now Windchill 10:49 pm There's meltdown in the sky... Bull 10:49 pm Y-yeah. Better to get back before Meckel notices we're not there. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:49 pm [[As you wish.]] Toothless 10:49 pm *shakes helm at FloorFlopper, waves a pincer goodbye at everyone* Windchill 10:49 pm If you can judge a wise man by the color of his skin... Then mister you're a better man than I. LIVIN' ON THE EDGE. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:50 pm //Seeya, scraplet. Don't eat nothin' too big.// Toothless 10:50 pm ((...yes Windchill, there is a *scraplet* judging you)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:50 pm @T: (txt): Then humor sense. FakeProwl 10:50 pm *Appears. Flops into his usual spot.* ... I'm back. Windchill 10:51 pm (( He's judged, shunned and snubbed by everyone, that's small potatoes. )) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:51 pm ((for u windchill)) Tarantulas 10:51 pm You - you are! *startled spide* FakeProwl 10:51 pm *He says, casually, as though he actually appeared the first time long enough for his avatar to even materialize. And as though he didn't miss the entire movie.* Windchill 10:51 pm *Eyebrows lift like a startled flock of pigeons.* Toothless 10:51 pm *hops down to bump helm gently against FloorFlopper and purr* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:51 pm //You two need escoratin' home 'n all that?// Magnum Ace 10:51 pm Yes. I think Owner is beginning to notice that we're vanishing for hours at a time FakeProwl 10:52 pm *... Is Prowl's usual seat, per chance, being occupied by a spider.* Windchill 10:52 pm *SINGS ALONG.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:52 pm *RECORDS. With a brief ping hello to Prowl.* Windchill 10:52 pm *Sorry, it's soprano as usual. It's bad.* Tarantulas 10:52 pm *technically sw and spide have probably taken up the whole couch on their own* Toothless 10:52 pm *...then skitters off to find its way home* FakeProwl 10:52 pm *Which means Prowl landed in someone's lap, doesn't it.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:52 pm //All right, c'mon.// *Slide off couch.* //You comin', scr--oh. Huh. Moves quick, don't it?// FakeProwl 10:53 pm *... gingerly relocates himself to the nearest non-occupied couch space. an armrest, maybe.* Tarantulas 10:53 pm *tara scoots over to make room in the middle, no worries* FakeProwl 10:53 pm *he'll take it.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:54 pm //Anyhow. C'mon. Gotta getcha goin' before.... /Owner/ notices.// There's a little extra venom on the name. They don't much care for being owned, here. //Frenzy, lug Eject upstairs, huh?// ItsyBitsySpyers 10:54 pm \\YEAH, YEAH. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.\\ Windchill 10:54 pm *He's gonna have to go for an encore when he gets home. Record it and send it to his Serenadin' Friend.* FakeProwl 10:55 pm *looks tiredly at the leaguers. huh. well, apparently, he doesn't even need to FULLY activate his avatar program to induce whatever anomaly is bringing them here. good to know.* Windchill 10:55 pm *Folks be used to his singing in the shower by now anyway.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:55 pm *Soundwave nods to Tarantulas. Thank you. One bit of company is pleasant; both is better.* Tarantulas 10:55 pm (( oh god thanks i was worrying about the leaguers Magnum Ace 10:55 pm -noticed that. Is going to give Rumble a curious look for that- Bull 10:56 pm *Bull notices but doesn't seem to understand either* Windchill 10:56 pm *Sputters the finish* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:56 pm *Rumble's not gonna answer it tonight. That's a talk for next week, maybe. They already know what'll be playing, so. Might be relevant-ish.* *All he does is motion for them to follow him and head outside to the bridging lanes.* *Soundwave clicks feeler claws in polite applause for Windchill.* Magnum Ace 10:58 pm -following after him, but not going to ask- Right...we don't want to worry her Windchill 10:58 pm *He'd bow, but he's too lazy to get up so he'll salute from the floor instead.* *He'll take what he can get.* Bull 10:58 pm *follows* Night everyone. FakeProwl 10:58 pm *... very belatedly matches Soundwave's greeting ping.* Windchill 10:58 pm Does nobody else 'round here sing? *"sing"* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:59 pm *Soundwave nods goodnight to the Leaguers, taps his visor at Windchill - no mouth, you know - and looks over to Prowl.*

(txt): Emergency matter: settled? [[He seconds the question.]] FakeProwl 11:00 pm @Soundwave «... Not quite.» Windchill 11:00 pm Lame. Bull 11:00 pm ((Night all; I'm off to watch WTFIWWY)) ItsyBitsySpyers 11:00 pm ((night! enjoy the rest of your evening!)) Windchill 11:00 pm (( 'Night! )) Magnum Ace 11:00 pm ((and I'm laughing. Singing is brought up as they're leaving Windchill 11:01 pm (( YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE. )) ((...I don't think a Monday night goes by without some singing though so It Will Happen Again. )) Magnum Ace 11:02 pm ((oh, I just think that several of them can because their voice actors can ItsyBitsySpyers 11:02 pm @Prowl: (txt): Elaboration requested. Windchill 11:02 pm (( Go for it. )) Tarantulas 11:02 pm *is cuddling up to prowl. tara's in a good mood, spider-man was gr8* Magnum Ace 11:03 pm ((hehe, now getting one of them to do so would be the test ((but now I gotta go, because I have other stuff that need my attention Tarantulas 11:03 pm (( night!! Magnum Ace 11:04 pm ((so, thanks for the movie and g'night! ItsyBitsySpyers 11:04 pm ((night!)) Windchill 11:05 pm *Rolls onto his front. Butt: Exposed.* Tarantulas 11:05 pm *is there a dent in it* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:06 pm *Where's Whirl to put a foot on it when you need him?* Windchill 11:06 pm *No he fixed it. Mostly. There was still obviously a dent.* *Whirl, willingly touch The Butt?* FakeProwl 11:07 pm @Soundwave «Bonecrusher had a... I guess it was a nervous breakdown. We had to stop him from jumping off the balcony. Scavenger's scoop is broken. So's the TV. And several stairs. And several of your cameras. He's welded a fort out of berths in the corner of the the berth room. He refuses to come out. There's no way we're going to get him to go to work today, and Scavenger can't with his injury, which means Hook is going to be out fixing Scavenger, and all this has riled up whatever's hurting Mixmaster's fuel tank, which leaves Long Haul and me, and Long Haul isn't going to go in if the rest don't.» ItsyBitsySpyers 11:07 pm *...............Pit.* Tarantulas 11:07 pm (( ok but what if windchill used https://img.wonderhowto.com/img/14/73/63572489362819/0/fix-car-dents-8-easy-ways-remove-dents-yourself-without-ruining-paint.w1456.jpg

Windchill 11:07 pm *His face is getting real acquainted with the floor.* FakeProwl 11:07 pm @Soundwave «We need an excuse to not go to the work site and I need you to stop watching Bonecrusher.» Windchill 11:08 pm (( Is it bad that's the first thing I thought of? Let's say that he did. )) Tarantulas 11:08 pm (( bless FakeProwl 11:08 pm ((*hears song using "lightyear" as a unit of time and FLUFFS UP AGGRESSIVELY*)) Tarantulas 11:10 pm Were you asking if any of us CAN sing, or if we DO sing on occasion - or, if we can sing WELL at all? Just to clarify. Windchill 11:10 pm Any and all of the above? FakeProwl 11:11 pm @Soundwave «... Actually, I suppose "one of the team had an nervous breakdown due to prison surveillance and the rest of the team is dealing with the resultant injuries and fallout" is a perfectly valid excuse all by itself, so never mind, that part's sorted.» Tarantulas 11:12 pm Fair. Count me as a yes, then. Windchill 11:12 pm *He knows the Shrek version better.* *Tragic.* If you say so. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:13 pm *Now looking away from Prowl. He'd thought the Constructicons were made of sterner stuff. Expected some sort of aggressive confrontation, perhaps.*

(txt): ...Expectation: Bonecrusher gives appropriate respect, in future. Insults, insinuations, pranks: unwanted.

(txt): Soundwave repairs property damages, delivers appropriate work leave excuse. Bonecrusher watch: ended. Hook's medical supplies: replaced.

*Finally glancing back.*

(txt): ...What wrong, Mixmaster? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:15 pm *Oh. Well, it seems Prowl figured out the excuse himself. That's the trouble with working his thoughts into text, he supposes.* FakeProwl 11:15 pm *Destroying furniture and surveillance equipment isn't aggressive enough?*

@Soundwave «"Appropriate respect"? What, did he do something to you first?» ItsyBitsySpyers 11:15 pm [[...He did not know you were a 'yes', Tarantulas. Consider that another demonstration request.]] Tarantulas 11:16 pm I didn't say which part I was saying 'yes' to, goodness. There was the option of ANY. Windchill 11:16 pm Well, technically. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:16 pm [[His interest remains.]] Tarantulas 11:16 pm *huffs* Windchill 11:16 pm If you can sing then it follows that you must sing on occasion, or else that's unproven. And if you sing well, then you can sing. Some of those are mutually inclusive. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:18 pm *Directed at HIM. Not inanimate objects.*

@Prowl: (txt): Affirmative. Labeled [][][]sheet metal[][][], implied Soundwave: interface voyeur, subject: multiverse inhabitants, permission status: none. Long before, assisted false Prowl interface message delivery. Tarantulas 11:18 pm If the logic statement is A or B or C, and I answer yes, any one or pair or all could be true, so the mutual inclusion isn't a trouble. FakeProwl 11:19 pm @Soundwave «... You thought to refute the claim that you were a voyeur who watches people without their permission by... continuously watching him without his permission?» Windchill 11:19 pm Obviously, hence there being no real point in arguing a distinction, as there isn't much of one between them. Tarantulas 11:20 pm There's no point fussing though - let's just say I can sing, I do sing, and I'm not objective enough about my own voice to know whether it's done well or not. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:21 pm @Prowl: (txt): If that, insisted, supposed treatment: delivered. Now, true difference: known. Windchill 11:21 pm *Luckily, his face is still planted on the floor and his eye roll remains hidden. WHY NOT JUST SAY THAT THEN, it's so much easier.* Kill me softly... Tarantulas 11:21 pm (( sw u sound so petty rn and i love it FakeProwl 11:21 pm @Soundwave «I am afraid you have thoroughly convinced him you're an even worse voyeur than he'd suspected.» FakeProwl 11:22 pm @Soundwave «Also, a stalker, and a vague undefined threat to his life. Which I doubt is at all objectionable from your perspective, but from mine makes things difficult.» Windchill 11:23 pm *GRUNTS and picks himself up...to sit on his knees.* *Wipes his face in case it's dirty or drooly.* *Drool: unconfirmed.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:25 pm *Hand flick.*

@Prowl: (txt): Irritating. Acceptable belief, if future vocalizer control: excellent; rumor spread likelihood: low, now observance abilities: understood.

*And if Bonecrusher understands that Soundwave is a vague, undefined threat, then he might be able to use that if they ever turn on Prowl.*

(txt): ...However, Prowl: important. Continued over-surveillance: ended, per prior promise. Windchill 11:26 pm Anyway. Singing's all well and good. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:26 pm [[Of course it is.]] [[It delivers a full story with corresponding emotional cues in a short period of time, and often serves to make that data more memorable.]] Windchill 11:27 pm But can we all twerk? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:27 pm [[...You're not serious.]] Windchill 11:28 pm I'm always serious. *Keeps his face painfully straight.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:28 pm *Tarantulas was the only one to really answer the song question, so Soundwave peers at him with a feeler. Well?* Windchill 11:29 pm *Oh, he likes Disturbed.* FakeProwl 11:29 pm *Good. To Soundwave's other points then.* @Soundwave «Repairing the furniture is unnecessary. We can repair the damage ourselves. Except to the TV—but he destroyed it because he thought it was bugged from the game. Getting a new one straight from you wouldn't go over well.» Windchill 11:29 pm *But he'll be quiet this time.* *No sense in Ruining this one.* Tarantulas 11:30 pm *tara will glance at the feeler. what, is he expected to sing sometime? nope* Windchill 11:30 pm *COWARD.* Tarantulas 11:30 pm *also if he doesn't answer the twerking question does that mean it'll go away* FakeProwl 11:30 pm @Soundwave «Hook may not want supplies from you for the same concerns. We'll see whether we think Bonecrusher can handle it and get back to you.» Windchill 11:31 pm *Has ignoring Windchill ever worked?* Tarantulas 11:31 pm *maybe when they're listening to disturbed, it might* Windchill 11:32 pm I guess it's just me then. Only I have the power. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:32 pm *On the one hand, he's pleased that his plan to cause a little scare worked so well. On the other hand, they're being ridiculous. As if he would be so foolish as to put bugs where they'd be expected now.* Tarantulas 11:32 pm *so, shushed the spide will remain, and nudge at prowl while wrapping an arm or two or three around his back. awful quiet, this one* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:32 pm *But, what can you do?*

@Prowl: (txt): Acknowledged. FakeProwl 11:32 pm *You mistake Bonecrusher for somebody bright enough to figure that out.* Tarantulas 11:33 pm *looks back at chill* What, the power to thoroughly embarrass yourself? No thank you. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:33 pm *Whether Soundwave can twerk or not is unknown. Nobody's convincing him to either say it or try. Not in public, anyway.* Windchill 11:34 pm I'm too powerful to suffer embarrassment. That doesn't happen to me. If I twerk, I OWN IT. Along with everything else that brings shame to lesser mortals, such as yourself. *He's joking, but it's also true: he feels no shame.* Windchill 11:36 pm *His straight faced facade breaks, and he snickers.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:36 pm *...For a split-second, Soundwave was tempted to be one last bit of vicious and ask if Bonecrusher needed to be put under a safety watch.*

*He gives no sign of that nasty little urge, burying it back where it came from. None of that, now. That's the older version of himself.* [[Lesser mortal?]] Windchill 11:38 pm That's what I said. *Shields his mouth, but can't hide that snicker.* Tarantulas 11:39 pm *squints. tarantulas doesn't trust that snicker* Windchill 11:39 pm *He's pretending to be egotistical.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:40 pm *Soundwave pauses for a moment, gathers up every. single. clip. he. has. of his alternates claiming to be superior, and squashes them into one big overlapped file.* *And plays that.* Windchill 11:41 pm *Giggle-spits* FakeProwl 11:41 pm @Soundwave «Regarding Mixmaster—prolongued stress. His aches are eith—» Tarantulas 11:41 pm *pfftsdfs* Windchill 11:41 pm *Getting defensive, are we?* FakeProwl 11:41 pm *startles so hard at the sound that he ends up on Tarantulas's lap* Windchill 11:41 pm That was beautiful. FakeProwl 11:41 pm *what the hell, soundwave* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:41 pm *Not at all. He's just reminding you of the most common claim.* Tarantulas 11:41 pm *tarantulas accepts his fate and wraps another arm around prowl* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:42 pm @Prowl: (txt): Apology delivered. Continue. FakeProwl 11:42 pm *Gives Soundwave a baffled look. He has not been keeping up with the conversation.* Windchill 11:42 pm *That's what makes it funny.* Tarantulas 11:43 pm Does this mean you can twerk then, Soundwave? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:43 pm *BOI* Tarantulas 11:43 pm If you're superior, that is. Windchill 11:43 pm I still can't be embarrassed, so. FakeProwl 11:43 pm @Soundwave «... His aches are either psychosomatic, or being faked. Whichever it is, it's caused by stress.» Windchill 11:43 pm I'm clearly in a league of my own... ItsyBitsySpyers 11:44 pm [[All it means is that his alternates disagree with Windchill's assessment.]] Tarantulas 11:44 pm *snrk. he'll accept that answer with a nod* Windchill 11:44 pm Alternates Schmalternates, what do they know? They've never met ME. Well. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:44 pm [[His? More than most.]] Windchill 11:44 pm 'Cept one. But I stole his girlfriend. So, superiour. *Dusts off imaginary lapels.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:45 pm @Prowl: (txt): Stress? Ache problem before excess surveillance? After? Tarantulas 11:46 pm *nips at prowl just hard enough to transfer through the avatar* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:46 pm [[One. Of more than eighty. He'll reserve judgment.]] Windchill 11:47 pm I can't count, so that means nothing to me. Neither do the opinions of lesser mortals such as they. *Trying not to crack up for real.* FakeProwl 11:48 pm @Soundwave «After. It's not the only cause, but—our mental states leak into each other. I have no doubt Bonecrusher's stress is a contributing factor to Mixmaster's.» ItsyBitsySpyers 11:49 pm @Prowl: (txt): Noted.

*He's still going to wait and see if it ends after the surveillance has. Wouldn't do to miss some sort of plague in the making.* @Prowl: (txt): Belief: Tarantulas desires attention. FakeProwl 11:51 pm @Soundwave «............ What?» ItsyBitsySpyers 11:52 pm *Snapshot of Tarantulas biting Prowl's avatar just now on the visor.* FakeProwl 11:52 pm *Prowl just dealt with a violent nervous breakdown with four other angry/scared people. That's a level 149 social interaction and his skills capped out at level 32. Prowl's tired.* Tarantulas 11:52 pm *tarantulas sees that there, sw* FakeProwl 11:53 pm *Oh. Look at that. Turns toward Tarantulas.* What? Tarantulas 11:54 pm *small hhff.* ...I exist, you know. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:54 pm *Don't say he isn't helpful, Tarantulas.* Windchill 11:54 pm *Examines his claws, then climbs to his feet.* FakeProwl 11:55 pm *Hold on, he's trying to think of a reply to that.* FakeProwl 11:56 pm ... Oh. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:56 pm *Soundwave watches Windchill get up, visor cleared off and all.* Windchill 11:57 pm I'm gonna take my superiour self home and practice my twerking, since I'm the only one who can and you're all out of comebacks. Lover's spats don't interest me. Tarantulas 11:57 pm ...

*just gonna. sigh and tip his helm back onto the couch. patience and self-control. u got this tara* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:57 pm [[Very well. Enjoy yourself.]] Windchill 11:58 pm I will, because shame isn't in my programming. I almost feel sorry for the rest of you. What a horrible way to live. FakeProwl 11:58 pm *That wasn't a satisfactory answer, was it?* Sorry. I'm tired. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:58 pm [[He can think of worse.]] Windchill 11:59 pm So can I, but it still sucks to be you. Tarantulas 11:59 pm *waves windchill off with a spider leg* Yesterday Windchill 11:59 pm Not like me. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:00 am *Soundwave taps his visor again. Sorry. No sucking, as far as the public knows. Once more: no mouth.* Windchill 12:00 am *He will not be shooed before he's ready by LESSER MORTALS.* Sucks to be you. *He waves slowly, in an arc over his head like the rays of the rising sun. For the drama.* Good night, you shameful suckers. You shame-filled doughnuts. So creamy. So satisfying. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:02 am [[Goodnight.]] *He's not going to remark on the other part. That's just strange.* Windchill 12:03 am *That's because you have no sense of humour.* Tarantulas 12:03 am What do you even know about eating donuts? ...Don't answer that, just. On with you. *another spider leg wave* Windchill 12:03 am Don't tell me what to do, I'm already going. But, maybe if you ask nicely. Tarantulas 12:03 am Please. Windchill 12:04 am I'll stay. Okay. *sits down.* Tarantulas 12:04 am *oh primus is he serious* *who is he kidding. windchill's always serious* Windchill 12:04 am *Always.* *Especially right now.* I feel so wanted. So appreciated. Thanks. Tarantulas 12:05 am This'd be a lovely time for a bridge to just. Spontaneously open below Windchill's now-undented aft. Windchill 12:05 am You think? *Blips out of existence.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:06 am *He's not going to do that. Windchill hasn't broken any rules.* *Well. He has before. But not right now.* Windchill 12:08 am *That WOULD be disparate treatment, but he's used to that. As much as he is used to not getting rules updates or being made accountable for other people hitting him, but it matters not. That's his life, and he's gone now.* Tarantulas 12:09 am *mmff. back to prowl.* I'm sure you are. *mostly genuine-sounding* FakeProwl 12:10 am *Prowl can't read tone, genuine-sounding or otherwise. He's 73% certain that's sarcasm.* *... Quietly tries to shrug off Tarantulas's arms and slide back into his prior seat.* Tarantulas 12:11 am *what happens if he tries to keep hold of him tho* FakeProwl 12:12 am *He'll stop for a few seconds. And then quietly try again.* Tarantulas 12:15 am Come now, if you're going to ignore me, you might as well try to placate me by sitting on my lap while you do it. FakeProwl 12:16 am *Right. Okay. He's not going to sit around and take that. He's going to go incorporeal to slide out of Tarantulas's arms.* Tarantulas 12:16 am *stiffens up* FakeProwl 12:16 am I wasn't ignoring you. I said I'm tired. Tarantulas 12:18 am You can be both, you know. FakeProwl 12:18 am I'm not both. I'm tired. Tarantulas 12:19 am I /heard/ you. I said so. Primus. *glances at soundwave* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:20 am *What? Why is he being glanced at? Looks from one to the other with mild confusion.* FakeProwl 12:21 am *... What does he say to that?* *...... Nothing, he supposes.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:22 am This message has been removed. ((get out of there random brackets)) Tarantulas 12:24 am *proceeds to get up* Apparently you're still conscious enough to run your avatar and stop by Dancitron, but I won't stress you any more than that by asking that you acknowledge my existence. That'd be petty. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:24 am *...Hold on, now.*

[[One moment.]] FakeProwl 12:24 am ... I came by to conduct necessary business. It has been concluded. I should leave. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:25 am [[Do not blame Prowl for being tired. It was concerning a matter he himself failed to correct.]] FakeProwl 12:25 am Don't. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:26 am [[...And he does not understand this - this. Tarantulas agreed.]] Tarantulas 12:29 am Prowl is tired. "Business" is concluded. And clearly I'm not needed here, so - *starts to huff, but just sighs and lets his shoulders fall.* It's of no consequence. I'll speak with you both another time. FakeProwl 12:29 am *... Disappears.* Tarantulas 12:30 am *he's trying not to let this get to him. he's trying. he had a good time watching the movie, damnit, and now - well.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:30 am *Primus damn it all. What HAPPENED? One moment he was nudging Prowl's attention away from a settled matter so Tarantulas would have time tonight and suddenly it'd become some sort of minor spat?* [[You may stay longer if you wish. If you do not, then he accepts your farewell for the night.]] Tarantulas 12:33 am ...I would stay, but there's really no reason to, is there. Hyeh. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:34 am *And he doesn't understand the "don't", either. What was he supposed to do, NOT take responsibility for what'd held Prowl's attention up when something about that had spawned all of this?*

[[That is not his decision.]] Tarantulas 12:37 am No, it might not be, but - nevermind. *walks off abruptly, small wave behind him* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:38 am *Soundwave watches Tarantulas go and shakes his helm. Well. That was... something. He's done with the day. Upstairs and straight to recharge for him.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:45 am *Except that it doesn't come as easily as usual. Not understanding bothers him as it is. Somehow, the added "don't" makes it worse.*

*Well, he's not going anywhere else, and neither is Prowl. Quick comm, on the off-chance he might actually get an answer.*

(txt): Clarify: [][][]don't[][][]. FakeProwl 12:48 am *It takes a moment for Prowl to reply.* «What?» *And a moment longer to figure out what it's about.* «Oh. Moment. Gotta move.» *Please hold for about a minute.* FakeProwl 12:54 am *Right. He's back. Had to get out on the balcony. Prowl doesn't know whether being in comm contact with Soundwave would upset Bonecrusher but he wasn't going to keep sitting next to Ft. Berth and find out.* «There is one and only one reason that I told you what happened in here: because you have access to our cameras and a duty to monitor them, and would have very shortly found out anyway. What happened in here is absolutely nobody's business but Bonecrusher's, and it most certainly is not Tarantulas's business.» «The reason I told him I was tired is because that is the PRECISE amount of information about the situation I wanted him to know.» ItsyBitsySpyers 1:01 am @Prowl: (txt): Detail offer never intended. If demanded, suitable alternative explanation given. ((fucking enter key too early)) ItsyBitsySpyers 1:04 am (txt): Tarantulas truth promise never given. Addition: Telepathic permission not received. Prowl reason: unheard, unidentified. If argument source: Soundwave, blame: absorbed, misunderstanding severity: split, reduced. Potential Tarantulas threat: reduced.

(txt): In future, silence retained unless addressed. FakeProwl 1:07 am «... Do you think Tarantulas was becoming a threat?» *Oh, Primus, Prowl is too tired for this. He's too tired for this. Let him sleep and never wake up.* ItsyBitsySpyers 1:10 am (txt): Not within moment. Perhaps if future reconciliation: failure. Unknown. Personal choice: minimize failure, potential outcome. Situation view correction, clarification: accepted. Additional details not required. FakeProwl 1:11 am «...... Do you think future reconciliation failure is a significant risk.» ItsyBitsySpyers 1:17 am (txt): Uncertain. Volatile personality: non-standard personal companion choice. Personal preference: caution.

(txt): Prowl Mesothulas-Tarantulas familiarity: higher. If reconciliation: expected, expectation: adopted. That, all known now. FakeProwl 1:18 am *Too late, Prowl's been infected with doubt.* ItsyBitsySpyers 1:18 am *Damn it.* FakeProwl 1:19 am «...... Was I that bad.» ItsyBitsySpyers 1:19 am (txt): Bad? FakeProwl 1:20 am «At— At... Whatever I did. Wrong.» ItsyBitsySpyers 1:25 am (txt): Prowl: not bad.

(txt): Curious action: slide away after Tarantulas agreement. Not understood. FakeProwl 1:25 am «... What.» *After Tarantulas what? To what? When? He rubs his helm as he digs back in the audio files.* FakeProwl 1:28 am *It takes him a moment to figure out what Soundwave read as an agreement.* «He wasn't agreeing. That was sarcasm.» *Beat.* «... WASN'T that sarcasm? Was it NOT? Was Tarantulas being SINCERE? Oh, DAMMIT—» *The comm mutes. Give Prowl a second.* ItsyBitsySpyers 1:29 am *...Well, he THOUGHT it sounded sincere. Now he's the one infected with doubt. But he'll give Prowl a second.* FakeProwl 1:30 am *He unmutes the comm, but he doesn't make the mistake of saying anything else. Apparently he's no good at that tonight.* ItsyBitsySpyers 1:36 am *It takes a couple of seconds of background noise to work out that it's back on and Prowl is being silent.*

(txt): ...Perhaps recharge: helpful. Cell situation: stressful. Stressed Prowl social limits: strained, restricted.

*He learned that months before, when he got snapped at.*

(txt): Evening: stress addition. Within ability, minor solution: rest, peace, quiet. Afterward, examination: easier.

(txt): Soundwave gives, if wanted. FakeProwl 1:41 am *Huff. Stressed. You think? You think, Soundwave? You think Prowl hasn't realized he's been dealing with not only his own stress of being locked up with five people he hates but also the mental weight of their gradual disillusionment with him AND the nervous twitchy mind-picking fear pouring out of Bonecrusher AND the traces of Bonecrusher's fear bouncing through the other Constructicons' minds AND the fear and guilt and pain over learning what happened to Dominus AND the fact that all this is going on while part of him wants to shut off and never turn back on do you think thAT PROWL DOESN'T KNOW HE'S IN A STRESSFUL SITUATION AND THAT IT'S TEARING HIS MIND'S ABILITY TO FUNCTION TO SHREDS, SOUNDWAVE, DO YOU REALLY THINK HE DOESN'T—*

«... Yes. Reasonable.» *It's a good thing he didn't give Soundwave permission for telepathy tonight.* ItsyBitsySpyers 1:51 am *Soundwave ends the call the second he understands that those are the only two words to be spoken.*

*Mostly because he's getting the growing and somewhat uncomfortable sense he shouldn't have carried on with his horrible surveillance game for so long. Maybe at all? He doesn't know. He has the right to be treated with respect, and the fear version of it is the only thing that's ever seemed to stick with Constructicons. But the more he thinks about it, the more he wonders if the shared connection means Prowl's secretly been afraid of his watching too. And a tiny part of the reason he took the job and restricted camera access so severely was to make sure Prowl would be SAFE. How is that safe?*

*All this mess in the prison cell, and with individual mechs, and how this is going to affect city rebuilding process, and partial responsibility for this business with Tarantulas, and--*

*...He really DOESN'T want to hurt Prowl. He would rather eat a scraplet. But what is he supposed to call all of this, if not that?*

*Well. Soundwave's still not going to get much recharge, but now it'll be because he's doing a very different kind of thinking.* FakeProwl 1:58 am This message has been removed. FakeProwl 2:06 am *... Soundwave hung up on him. No goodbye, no nothing. Now he was upset with Prowl, too? What had Prowl done wrong there? Was he too terse? Had he failed to filter out his anger? He wasn't angry because of Soundwave, he was just tired, he really WAS tired, it wasn't just an excuse—it was just an excuse, wasn't it? Had he sounded angry earlier tonight, when he was explaining to Soundwave what happened? He hadn't meant to. But had he come on too strong? Had he been dropping a hint about Prowl's attitude, when he'd mentioned that Prowl's social limits were restricted when he was stressed? Had Soundwave been telling Prowl he was being offensive? Had Prowl missed it? Should he call back and apologize? Had he already missed his chance to apologize?*

*He sits on the balcony, and pulls his knees to his chest. He stays there the rest of the night.*

#chat

3 notes · View notes