#get to know sagey

[mylittlevsoldier]

Introduction! (take 2)

hello! I noticed that I'm getting alot of new followers and the introduction i did was awful.

so here's a new one!

my name is Sage, but you can call me Sagey! I'm 15, my pronouns are she/they and i identify as a demigirl! (someone who was assing afab but dosen't fully i dont fully indentify w being a woman) I like talking about whatever comes to mind! Like the ship I like, Stranger things, writing, music, or any movies or tv shows i like.

heres a picrew of me!

I love to write! I have 3 fics im currently working on. All about Byler but i am working on a Reddie story but it is VERY bare bones at the moment. I'm also looking into doing an Elmax story!

MY FAV MOOTS

(i love all my mutuals but these are the ones i interact with the most!)

@elsbianism (i talk to them at least once day)

@theswiftiediaries13

@frogsdontcry

@onceintwentyylifetimes

@flormarchitada

@xxcreamixx

FAV CHARTERS!!!!

Will Byers (I'm so him. y'all don't understand)

Mike Wheeler

Richie Tozier

Beverly Marsh

Ron Weasly

Harry Potter

Hermoine Granger

Max Mayfield

Lucas Sinclair

Luna Lovegood

Remus Lupin

And SO many more

FAV SHIPS

Byler (Stranger Things)

Reddie (IT)

Elmax (Stranger Things)

Lumax (Stranger Things)

Ronance (Stranger Things)

Pansmione (Harry Potter)

Wolfstar (Marauders)

Boreo (The Goldfinch)

FAV ALBUMS!

(I love music more than life it's self.)

folklore by Taylor Swift

Pure Heroine by Lorde

Melodrama by Lorde

Born to die by Lana Del Ray

Harry's House by Harry Styles

Speak Now (Taylor's version) by Taylor Swift

Red (Taylor's version) by Taylor Swift

1989 (soon to be Taylor's Version)

anyway thank you for reading! that's enough rambling for now! bye! i love you!

#get to know me! #get to know sagey #intro

[ferdydurke]

Im jarchie pilled bc i think betty and tabitha deserve better (eachother)

#barking #throuple with agent drake even #no but jarchie is endgame independent of what the endgame is because jughead can only stop writing once his and archies stories end. #because archie IS the soul of riverdale and jughead is the narrator. you wouldnt get it #sorry for this me and sagey made a jarchie playlist and ive been listening to is so much #but also foreal i dont think anyone should SETTLE for staying in riverdale with archie esp not betty even tho theyre bestties i know i know

[spicysix]

writing patterns

rules: list the first line of your last 10 (posted) fics and see if there’s a pattern!

i was tagged by @cranberrymoons thank you sagey ♡

i did the Forever Halloween October Challenge and didn't want to post all the fics to take up the whole list so i chose just the first one

1. "The first time Eddie saw her, she thought she was a mirage." - girls make me wanna die [edancy]

2. " 'I'm a Pisces, y'know?' Robin babbles." - pisces drabble [buckingham]

3. "He never saw them coming." - TWYCC [brennan, el & kali]

4. " 'Shit!' she curses." - making a meal drabble [wheelingham]

5. "Chrissy Cunningham [09:41AM]: Hello, Steve! This is Chrissy from Marketing." - text me, call me (kiss me, i'll be waiting) [cheerscoops]

6. " 'Jonathan!' Five voices in unison yelled at him." - jonathan drabble [spicy six polycule]

7. "Soulmates weren’t there when you were born." - i'll be with you, when the roses bloom again [cheerscoops]

8. "Steve was a dethroned King." - we'll never be (royals) [cheerscoops]

9. "She could feel them." - growing pains drabble [kas!chrissy]

10. "There was smoke around them." - i'd still know you drabble [jargyle]

i guess i like small and impactful (if i can say so) phrases to get started 🤭

no pressure tags: @steventhusiast @eriquin @shares-a-vest @thesolarangel

#lui ramles #lui writes #tagged ♡

[bonemoisturizer]

People I’d like to get to know better

Tagged by: @catboy-kakashi

How sweet of you to tag me!

Last song: Tring Quarry by Trash Boat. Absolute banger.

Favorite color: green. Especially a silvery sagey green. 💚

Currently watching: Mad Max Fury Road. And by currently I mean right now. Good movie. Fantastic aesthetics and character designs. Miss Furiosa I have feelings for you. Please.

Last movie/tv show: last movie. Well. See above. Last tv show? Naruto because SOME PEOPLE.

Spicy/savory/sweet: I have. SUCH. A sweet tooth I fear. Mint and chocolate <3 although I do go for savory. Thinking of some lovely beef stew I had recently. REALLY amazing stew… you wish you could have a stew that wonderful and delicious.

Relationship status: I have two lovely partners and I am so very lucky to have them :) I’m actually gonna go ice skating with one of them tonight!

Current obsession: NARUTO. In 2023. Because. Again. CERTAIN people are terrible and nasty.

Last thing you googled: buy shoebill online. For a bit with my friend.

Tagging: @gods-sugar-daddy @kes-geiszler @mangoob @newtgottlieb @lettuce-tv and anyone else who wants to!

[littlemxdoom-and-gloom]

Getting to Know You Better Tag Game

Tagged by @twilightarc-gm - hello! I'm flattered you thought of me!

Last song I listened to: Voodoo Doll - The Funeral Portrait

Favorite color: Always, always orange. If I must select a second - green. Like a sagey, pistachio green.

Currently watching: *deep sigh* Dungeon Meshi. I was starting to get annoyed by all the chatter, decided I would watch one episode and decide I hated it before blacklisting and then - it was really quite good. So now I am begrudgingly enjoying myself immensely. I am also moving quite slowly through the Legend of Condor Heroes (2017). So slowly, that it's really only nominal that I'm watching at all.

Current obsession: Well. I'm not sure I really do 'obsessions,' but I guess we could count The Wheel of Time. It's my friend's favorite book series and it's my brother's favorite book series, so I finally caved. I'm a little more than half way through the Eye of the World and it's got hooks in me now.

Last thing googled: 'Casablanca run time.' I was talking with a coworker about old Hollywood epics and intermissions. She asked how long Casablanca was, I looked it up (hour forty-two minutes) and we agreed it didn't count. Movies that do count include Doctor Zhivago, Gone with the Wind and Giant (but not Big, which is a differently movie entirely that I still managed to conflate with Giant).

As for tagging other people, I admit I'm a serial lurker who doesn't have online friends despite over a decade on tumblr at this point. Still, I can still tag - @neitherusenorornament, @awesomeavocadolove, and @syebae.

[theacedragon0w0]

Eye to Eye

STRIPE GIVING SOME FACTS FOR SAGE

Hazel belongs to @puffymucher

Vlk belongs to @imapuppy5000

Stripe entered the Vee tower, being a regular visitor as he became a close friend to Sage's spouses, he greeted the front desk as he made his way to the elevator.

He ran into the group as he was approaching the penthouse, with Velvette being the first to say hello to the colorful tiger.

"Bitch! how are you doing?"

"Nothing much darling, I was just wondering if I can have some bonding time with Sagey for a minute."

Hazel's and Vlk's ears flatten, with the hellhound growling, "I hope it ain't for Vlad laying another finger on Bluebell."

"Don't worry he isn't going to hear the last of it, it's just me and Sage."

Sage placed their hand on Hazel's arm, "It won't take long, I promise."

Vlk huffed, "Well make it quick, we have a very busy schedule."

Sage escorted Stripes into the penthouse, the coffee pot was still warm and half full so they poured the tiger a cup.

"Well what did you have to tell me that you couldn't do over the phone?"

"Always straight to the point, you take a lot from Vlad."

Sage grunted, "please don't compare me to him, did he sent you to convince me to work for him?"

"Sage, you know me well enough that I would never force you to go back there, especially since there is no more good memories there for you."

"Well, there's you and Benji."

"There's only me and Benji," Stripes corrected. He placed his cup down, "Listen, the real reason I'm here is to tell you why Vlad was so against you dating those four."

Sage stood up, "I know it's cause he thought that would get hurt again just like Crystal and Becca."

"Because he was hurt before I came into the picture."

Sage was still, processing those words.

"What? He got hurt?"

Stripes rubbed his temple, "Long before we became an item, he had his share of past lovers, and one just happened to almost get him killed because of it. I know it's messed up but he saw a bit of himself in you, to be honest so did I."

Sage sat back down, "huh, guess I figured that he thought I was too soft for the nine circles."

Stripe reached over to pat Sage's hand, "He never questioned on you being able to protect yourself, he was worried about you turning into him; heartbroken, bitter, and distant."

Sage exhaled, "And how did you manage to change his mind?"

"It wasn't me, but in fact you. And it was when you did that performance with Benji that Vlad finally noticed how happier you are than when you worked for us."

Sage looked away, "Tsk, didn't think it would take me performing a dance number to get that old man to change his mind."

Stripes laughed, "yeah, my Vlad tends to be an oddball at times, and I guess it doesn't fall far from the tree."

Sage stuck their tongue out at the tiger, but their smile couldn't be hidden, "Well, since we are being honest, you guys are the closest thing to family that I ever got, heh, even Vlad is like an emotionally constipated father to me."

The two cleaned up the table, Sage placing the cups in the sink with Stripes preparing to leave.

"Listen Sage, you and Vlad should talk over coffee sometime."

"I'll think about it, granted not here or at the Lion's Den for both our sake."

#hazbin hotel oc #oc x canon #hazbin hotel velvette #oc x oc #hazbin hotel #oh boy sage lore will be upon us

[lilac-multifandom-multishipper]

hiiiii sagey my love im warning you ahead of time me and gang are celebrating opp destruction so if you get any really sappy messages just know that 1. im out of it and 2. i probably mean it anyway

good to know!! i shall eagerly anticipate your sappiness. also i think i’m in your timezone now so that’s neat

#thyla!!

[sagesolsticewrites]

hi my love sagey!!! could i possibly request #18 from the xmas dialogue ("You have snow on your eyelashes, looks cute.”) with austin?? 🥺 i love you! 💕

- 🦋 mila :)

MIMS!!! Thank you so much for the request bestie!! ilysm 🥹💕

(you think I’m gonna write a fic about Austin and snow and not include this pic???)

Christmas shopping is supposed to be a magical time.

And it is, for the most part. Shopping with Austin for presents for your friends and playfully hiding the presents you’ve picked out for each other is incredibly fun, and you love taking in the shops adorned with lights, garlands, and decorations.

What’s not so magical, however, is the lack of snow, instead replaced by a biting cold wind and an icy slush from the frozen rain you’ve had covering the sidewalks.

Austin notices your slight pout as you trudge through the dirty slush on the sidewalk and nudges your shoulder comfortingly. He's just as bummed as you are about the lack of snow, but he tries to cheer you up. "Hey, the forecast said it'll probably snow tomorrow." He tries.

You shrug, smiling at his attempt to cheer you. “I know, but it’s not the same y’know? I’ll be at work all day, and I really wanted the first snow to be sometime when I could really appreciate it instead of being stuck at the office.”

“Well, we can always go out again tomorrow night to appreciate it.”

“I guess you’re right,” you smile, trying to push back your disappointment and instead turning your face to the sky. You frown at the darkening clouds above you, praying that the freezing rain will at least hold off until you’re able to get to the car.

It’s not until you’ve walked another block that you feel it. But it’s not the freezing rain you were expecting.

You beam, and you see a matching grin on Austin’s face as you both realize it at the same time: “Snow!”

You giggle as Austin leans his head back and sticks his tongue out to catch some of the snow, then turns back to you with a wide grin. White flakes are caught in his hair, his jacket, his lashes, and somehow it makes him look even prettier than he did before.

He notices your silence, the way you’re just scanning his face with a wide smile. “What?”

You shake your head, squeezing his hand, “It’s just… You have snow in your eyelashes. It’s cute.”

You see his cheeks, already red from the cold, turn a deeper shade of pink, and he playfully nudges you again. “Not as cute as you,” comes his soft reply, before pressing a kiss to your temple and pulling you along towards the car.

Send me drabble prompts!

#as someone who’s currently missing snow a lot this was so so so much fun to write 🥰 #thanks for the request bestie! <3 #sage answers #drabbles #mila 🦋 #austin butler #austin butler x reader #austin butler imagine #austin butler fic #austin butler fanfiction #austin butler fluff

[steventhusiast]

favorite things tag game

i was tagged by sagey poo @cranberrymoons <3

autistic person tries to figure out what their favourites are in any category challenge.. i will do my best!

movie – GOD this is a hard question i will instead tell you my top 4 movies on my letterboxd profile.

everything everywhere all at once. duh. watched that movie like multiple times and cried every time too. room. such a sad movie (i love sad movies) and jacob tremblay is GENUINELY incredible in this. so is brie larson but like. wow. spider-man into the spider-verse is always gonna be a fav for me i love spider-man. not sure if atsv tops it or not, will have to wait for the final movie to decide i think, but the what's up danger sequence gets me so hyped EVERY. TIME. and finally jojo rabbit. incredible movie. funny, moving, inspiring, tearjerking. taika is incredible. okay movie talk over. i love movies.

character – okay so i kind of just flit between steve harrington and peter parker every few months. they're my little guys one goes in each pocket.

animal – hmmmm of the classic pets i think cats, i love cuddling with them. but i am sooo fascinated by snakes. i would love to meet someone with a pet snake so i could hold one.

season – autumn. but specifically like early autumn? where it's not raining much and isn't horribly cold, it's just like. the leaves are going orange and it's the kind of weather you could wear any outfit and survive in you know.

food – fuck. no idea. i kind of exist on safe foods hmmm. when i treat myself i always like to get myself a katsu tofu curry though. so maybe that? i don't have it often though.

place – unironically i am such a home body. love being at home and in my room so much. i have all my trinkets and collections in here, and if i wanna talk to people i just go to the living room! but outside of my house? brighton is a great city i love visiting there. even though i hate the beach (sorry sage)

color – i think it's like sage green at the moment. only figured that out because i noticed how overrun with green my room is getting. it's a very pretty colour.

hobby – playing video games! i'm the worst gamer ever because i'm not really good at any games and i never finish them, but i DO spend most of my time playing them. :D

congrats if you made it this far through my brain dump. hope you enjoy sage <3

no pressure tags forrrr: @theheadlessphilosopher @stobinesque @spoookysix @a-little-unsteddie

#tag game #sagey #cranberrymoons #gold talks #personal

[dark-twist-fairytales]

Keegan Moore

Here is the information on Keegan!

Tw!: Implied child abuse. Scarring (visualized).

NSFW warning: Tattoo placement is on the front of thighs, and while it isn't explicit or detailed, just a pre-emptive warning.

~Name information~

Name: Keegan Sage Moore

Nicknames + Origin: Kee- Shortened verision of his name due to not being able to say it fully. Sagey- Derived of his middle name, but only used by family. Tic-Tock- A nickname given by bullies, and while used in a derogatory way, uses it in pride in the bully's face.

Pronouns: He/HIm/His/Himself, but also accepts They/Them/Theirs/Themself

Meaning behind name: 'Keegan', a name pre-picked by his father, no matter if they were a boy or girl. 'Sage', a name picked by his mother for the nature match amongst her children. 'Moore', lost to history for him

~Base Information~

Age: 27

Birthday: July 8th (07/08)

Height: 6 foot 6 inches (198.12 cm)

Weight: 217 lbs (98.43 kg)

Sexuality: Asexual, Demi-Romantic

Meaning: Asexual means he doesn't feel a strong sexual attraction to people. Demi-romatic means he feels a romantic attraction to people ONLY after he developes a strong friendship/gets to know them for a while.

~Physical Information~

Scars: 

Explanation: Burns (Cigs) - Kee's stims has always happened, even while a child. His mother, not pleased with it, would place lit cigarettes against his shoulders. | Cluster Burn Scars, Hypertrophic - These are raised scars from multiple burn scars being placed in the same spot. | Knife #2 - This is the reason his father is in prison. An attack towards his siblings with a knife. He took the hit on his hand, and stalled his father enough for the police to come and take him away. This happened when they were 15 | Knife #1 - A bully attacked at school at age 17, while in high school. It looks less like the 2nd cut, since his sister was nearby and was taking first aid classes.

Hair Type: Medium brown, thick, fluffy, and cut a certain way for sentimental reasons.

Eyes: A dark blue with purple-ish undertones. Some reports spot stars of red in them when angry and speaking full sentences, others report golden specks when actively talking.

Distinguishing Features: Uneven haircut. Large scars on palm of left hand. Large patch of burns on top of both shoulders.

Piercings: None

Jewelry: Sometimes wears a red and white, mushroom patterned ring on right hand, but only a few days out of the year.

Tattoos: One on lower back that a needle and thread running though 'MOORE' with the thread connected to a spool, and another on both thighs that is the solar system connected like a puzzle

~Medical Information~

Physical Disabilities: Speech disabability, unable to say the letter/sound 'n' or too complex of words.

Gained?: Had since birth (mother smoked during pregnancy)

Allergies: None that he's aware of.

Dietary Specifications: No special need.

Mental Disabilities: Seperation Anxiety (minor form, but can get intense at certain moments). Night Terrors (not reported nightly, may be connected to anxiety). Learning disablity (origin unknown, only seemed to be in English/Language Arts/Reading, but only ever in English)

~Family Information~

Mother: Anabell Lily Moore (maiden name: Kindle). Deceased.

Father: Nicholas Morsal Moore. Alive, in prison

Siblings: 4

Older Brother: Nicholas Morsal Moore II. Alive, ex-Toppat member, currently house-husband

Older Sister: Natalia Lilith Moore. Dead.

Triplet Sibling (Younger): Conner Rose Moore. Alive, tattoo artist

Triplet Sister (Younger): Laurn Rosemary Moore. Alive, doctor

Distant Realatives Relevant?: Yes

Uncles: Rhett Hamlet & Flynn Jameson Kindle

Why: Cared for triplets after they turned 16

Life Before The Clan:

It was complicated. He couldn't get a job when he was old enough to move out, and he had to move out once he turned 18 for legal reasons. Unlike his siblings, he didn't have anything set for him academically, and took to crime to get money to pay for anything. He did get paid for a few things, like his tattoo was paid for and he got money for it for being a test for a new ink gun and ink (courtesy of Conner). He still in contact with his siblings, being the eldest triplet, but they aren't often seen around each other.

Powers?: There is an odd occurance, typically seen the strongest around his siblings, but the only thing people can explain it as.. 'Stars within the void, both so bright and so dark, that it's impossible to see'.. Whatever that means.

Joining the clan

Roommates with Ezhno

#henry stickmin oc #my art! #information plotting #tw scars #scars #keegan moore #edit: ON HIS OWN POST I SPELT HIS NAME WRONG IN THE TAGS #IM SO SORRY KEE

[glitterdustcyclops]

tagged by @lookingforsomematches

Alias/name : choco

Birthday : july 8th

Zodiac : cancer sun, pisces moon, leo rising

Height : 5'7"ish

Hobbies : i have adhd literally everything is my hobby but anyway writing, doodlin frogs, various crafts, occasionally painting, sometimes graphic design, legos, playing video games, journaling/calligraphy, collecting tiny plastic nonsense and other various trinkets and tchotchkes, oh god there's so many more help

Favorite color : iridescent, but the actual-color answer is mint green + pink

Favorite book : ohhhhh god. usually i say it's the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy which did a lot to inform my sense of humor and really inspired me as a writer, but i also can't remember half of it now and never got further than i think part of the restaurant at the end of the universe. one day i'll go back and re-read the whole series. probably. maybe.

Last song : home - kimbra (kimbra is so goooood guys if you've never listened to her stuff outside of somebody that i used to know check her out!!!)

Last Movie / Show : my dad just finished watching the charmed reboot and i kinda got into it right at the last season, and now it's over, and i'm a lil sad about it

Recent read : some random kindle unlimited gay romance novel about a pretty albino boy who gets saved by evil human traffickers by a bunch of hot mercenary-type dudes. it wasn't great but the sex scenes were hot and i love any kind of polyamory rep, even in trashy tropey romance novels.

Inspiration : right now i have my coffee-scented candle burning and that is sparking some serious cozy-fall-vibes inspo, so imagine that and enjoy

Fun fact : i can't whistle! i can play the flute and i can actually blow across pretty much any bottle and make a tone but i just can't get my mouth to whistle. nor can i blow bubblegum bubbles, and i suspect the two are related.

Story behind URL : one of my friends in college suggested it as a pesterchum handle that seemed to fit my vibe and i took it and ran with it. i can't remember if the cyclops OC i designed came first or after, but basically it seemed like fate.

What’s the colour palette of your name?

did both choco & my real name and gonna be honest i'm never much a fan of muted earthy tones like this but some of the ones in my real name palette are speaking to me, esp. that dark navy + orange + pale sagey green combo happening over in the right corner there

anyway i guess i'll tag @teddytoroa @solobagginses @musicismymoirail and anyone else who wants to do it, as always tag me so i can see your answers!!!!!

#about the chocolate #tag meme

[walkinginland]

Tagged by: @theawkwardterrier thank you friend!!

rules: tag nine people you want to get to know better

three ships: this is like picking children dear lord but here are the first ones that came to my mind. tarlos (911 lone star), joe/ox (green creek), roweaelin (throne of glass)(i miss them 💔)

first ship: this was previous to me knowing Anything about the existence of fandom, but I did indeed think about Aragorn/Arwen an obsessive amount for many years up to and including now

fave color: historically it’s always been blue but i’ve really been feeling a sagey green lately

last song: Time to Run by Lord Huron

last movie in the theater: uhhhhhhh idk? maybe Death on the Nile last february?

last show: i don’t keep up with many new shows, or start many to binge.... I started watching ted lasso a few months ago but didn’t get around to finishing it. I did watch Kenobi with my dad and brother when that was releasing.

currently watching: 911 Lone Star is back airing, and OG 911 comes back in two weeks, sooooo that pretty much takes up what i can keep up with on a release basis. thinking about watching tlou because of the characters etc however i am a baby and not interested whatsoever in scary things so. we’ll see.

currently reading: One Dark Window by Rachel Gillig. this is technically a buddy read however i am a pokey puppy and have not kept up with my buddies lmao I’M SORRY PALS

currently working on: for knitting I’m making a baby blanket for my nephew due in April, and my 2023 temperature blanket is always in progress. for writing I’m working on a 5+1 JamieClaire fic; canon compliant for season one and inspired by Hozier’s “Someone New.” I’m looking forward to seeing how it comes together, and I’ve been enjoying rewatching some season 1 scenes for inspo 🥰 I’ve also been thinking about trying my hand at 911 or Lone Star fic buuuuut I have all the emotions and no ideas so. we shall see if anything actually comes of that.

current obsession: idk what they put in these weewoos, man, but here we are.

tagging: no pressure at all but 👀👀 hey there @badbitchbeauchamp, @paperstorm, @three-drink-amy, @mocalmangeal, @wafflesetc, and anyone else who would like to play :))

#textin

[mintawasalreadytaken]

Hi hi hello! If you so wish, and if it inspires anything, can I please have prompts no. 5 and or 9? And or any of them you'd like? And or anything, literal? All the love and admiration and puppy dog eyes! 💖

your girl has been in a mood so i wrote this angsty little *cough, why is it now 5.7k, cough* response to prompt no. 9: "Yes, but it'll cost you." this is also indebted to @ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm’s really beautiful fic(s?) featuring the theme of “firecrackers are bullshit that cause nothing but stress and strife”.

get socked in the feels over on AO3 or read the whole thing below in Tumblr formatting like a real sadist below:

1

It started when Harry caught Malfoy puking behind the greenhouse in eighth year.

It was Gryffindor’s turn to host the Halloween party, and so as the unspoken rule of all festivities went, Slytherins weren’t permitted to attend. 

Harry stepped outside for a breath of fresh air, meaning he slipped away as soon as Dean placed the empty bottle they'd been passing around on the pavers. The eyes of those near flew to it, mesmerised by the possibility of a game to force them out of their skin and into someone else's. Spin the Bottle was as likely as Seven Minutes In Heaven, only they called it Seven Minutes now because the reference to Heaven was an invitation for Death to join the party, and Death was a maudlin guest. It was best to leave Death to linger in her usual shadowy corner at their gatherings. She sucked enough Life from them every day already. 

Harry didn't slip so much as stumble through the back half of the Desert greenhouse, overturning a potted cactus as he went. The plant turned to black ooze before his eyes, which prickled with undue feeling. He didn't trust his voice to utter Reparo, so he stood and blinked fast and fled to where the air was clear and cold and the cheering of a spin, a meeting of someone's slick lips with another's, was distant. The scene he fled to was unfortunately even more wretched. 

He’d left the promise of lovely kissing for Malfoy, retching, one spindly hand clutching the nearest tree. Harry watched him vomit, saw his cheeks hollow as he gathered saliva and spat and spat again. He wiped his mouth with his cuff and cursed quietly. 

Three body-lengths away, it was as close as they'd been all year.

Malfoy turned to stagger up the slight incline, slipped and fell to hands and knees. He groaned and dipped his head until the lankest, longest bit of his hair caught on the grass. It was dew tipped and in the bright of moonlight, Malfoy was rendered in black and white. He was alone. He smelled, even at a distance, strongly of weed. He leaned his forehead into the ground and just as Harry wondered what he would do next, and wanted to escape in case it was cry, because everyone was crying all over the place lately, or maybe pass out, and Harry didn't want to be the one to nudge him over so he didn't choke on his puke in the night—Malfoy looked up.

He huffed a breath of surprise.

"Hullo, Potter."

He pressed one hand to a knee and used the other to lever himself off the ground. He stood, poorly, as though on a wave-battered ship.

"Malfoy. You weren't invited."

"Ah, yes. That's why I'm—" he gestured over his shoulder and then fumbled for something in his pocket. Harry had his wand out at the ready when Malfoy's hand returned with the source of the strong sagey scent of burnt cannabis.

"Would you like this? It seems I don't know my limits."

Harry frowned.

"No. Bugger off before you ruin everything."

Malfoy pocketed the roach. He looked at his feet, stumbling, and fell back so his shoulders rested on the oak he'd recently used as a lavatory.

"I like parties," Malfoy said wistfully, to the moon. 

Harry lowered his wand.

"The people at this one don't like you. You should go."

"I want to be invited to parties. I'm good fun when I'm not—" Malfoy gestured again, apparently unable to debase himself by describing his debauched physical state.

Harry snorted. He scrubbed his face, palm dry against hot cheeks. The air wasn't enough. He needed water and a lie-down. He needed away from this conversation. He needed his bed, to be alone in it, for a long time. Harry was sick of being awake and tired of sleeping through sunlight and too exhausted to rest and—

"You're not good, though. You're—you shouldn't even be here," he said. It hurt Malfoy to hear it. It showed on his face, the way he winced. His face kept the screwed-up look long after Harry said it, and Harry took that to mean Malfoy got his deeper meaning.

"None of us should be here," Harry continued. His mouth was running away with him. He meant himself, not the rest of them. He shouldn't be here, he meant. He wasn't supposed to feel anymore. He didn't want to be around, but here he was, around, mucking shit up and putting that twist in Malfoy's face, Malfoy who Harry should be allowed to hate, to want dead. Harry should be allowed at least that hate, shouldn't he?

"I want to be here," Malfoy said. From the careful way he said it, he meant it the big way too. "I want to want it. You know?"

"Go away, Malfoy," Harry said. His throat hurt and he'd been staring at Malfoy's too pale eyes and his dishevelled, too greasy hair for too long. He knew all about how Malfoy looked these days. He needed to go.

There was a long pause, into which Malfoy schooled his features. He stared at the sky, which freed Harry from feeling stared at, a feeling he rarely escaped with other people. It was refreshing, even if his simmering anger didn't dissipate, only sunk lower into his guts, where it was less noticeable.

"I need to learn," Malfoy spoke with a serious slowness, "how to be the sort of person who gets invited to parties.” Harry realised the reason he sounded a little dreamy, a little Luna, was because he was high. Malfoy snorted, the wide line of his lips curling up close to his pointy nose. Malfoy snorted at a joke he hadn't said aloud, and it was the first time Harry had seen him smile all year. 

"Honestly," Harry said, tiredly, because he was, after all, tired, and talking to Hogwarts eighth year's equivalent to the town drunk, "fuck off, Malfoy."

Malfoy’s smile shrunk to a tiny little one. "I'm serious. I'll throw one. I'll pay for all the Weasl—hey, no! I wasn’t—"

Harry stormed off towards the lake and found it easy to knock Malfoy's grasping hands from his robes. The lake was a glittering black jewel in the night, Malfoy a yippy dog at his heels.

"But I didn't mean it—oh, come on, you know I—"

When Harry stopped Malfoy didn't and they fell to the earth in one uncoordinated tangle of limbs. Harry growled and rolled away and balled his fists up to his mouth and yelled an incoherent sound and Malfoy scooted away very quickly. Harry didn't punch Malfoy in the mouth because he was busy doing his own desperate breathing. Harry very much wanted to be alone and to not kill Malfoy and the other boy was making that very difficult for him.

"Why won't you leave me alone?"

"Because I need you to teach me, Potter," Malfoy said. He crawled closer and stopped just out of kicking distance. His shirt was missing a button and where he'd been wearing one earring there was an unhealed gash of a cut like someone had ripped it out, and he was pitiful. Malfoy, with little left in the world, was a pitiful creature come to Harry Potter for help, and Harry rolled onto his back and closed his eyes against the glittering of the stars. They were rotating too fast anyhow.

"I meant it as a joke,” Malfoy’s small voice cut the cold air. “I'll pay for things. I'll be polite, I'll let Hufflepuffs attend, and, and—I'll supply anything anyone wants. I meant it, that the Weasley's can come. I mean to—"

"Yes," Harry said. Malfoy’s stammering stopped. 

"Really?"

Harry dragged an arm over his eyes. 

"I said yes, didn't I?"

Harry peeked. Malfoy was beaming at him. His face a beacon, too white, reflecting back the happiness he gained from Harry's yes. Like Harry was his savour. Like Harry was the sun.

"But it'll cost you," Harry added because he couldn’t have one more person look at him like that. He thumped his head to the frozen ground and did it again for good measure.

2

Malfoy's education in being a person other people wanted to be around was not a particularly difficult one. 

"Keep your mouth shut," Harry snapped when Malfoy opened his mouth to deliver an easy jibe. He did, and lowered his head, and stopped speaking out of turn in class. 

"That's your cue," Harry said, brows raised expectantly when Malfoy's benchmate in Potions was missing their quill and had tapped Harry, rather than Malfoy, on the shoulder to ask to borrow one. 

"Oh," Malfoy said, and squirrelled around in his bag to hand one over. The student, a seventh-year girl Harry hadn't met before, looked at the eagle feather like it was covered in boils.

"Uh. Thanks," she managed. Malfoy nodded, land went back to stirring their cauldron. Harry turned around and exhaled and wondered when the wad of feeling in his chest would reduce in size so he could breathe around it.

Ron noticed the new interactions and asked Harry whether he needed to make a pet project out of Malfoy.

"It's not like that. He's…trying," Harry said. Ron went back to his thoughts and Hermione to helping him through them. They didn’t fight anymore, the three of them. Not even over the tiny things. They asked questions or offered advice once and then left it alone. Or, at least that was how they dealt with Harry, now that there was them separate from Harry. He missed their closeness but didn’t miss the scrutiny. 

Hermione didn’t approve of the smoking, or the drugs, or the Malfoy of it all. She approved of attempts at reform though, so after a while she stopped checking in on Harry altogether. 

“We’re here if you ever need us,” she said when Harry and Ginny broke up. Harry nodded away the lump in his throat. He didn’t have words for what he might need to talk to them about. They were feelings without form. Not yet. 

3

Winter turned to spring, and Malfoy offered quills and bit his cheek to keep from laughing when someone stuttered over their reading in class, and soon Harry had little to say to him.

But the words were backed up in Harry's chest, so he went out of his way looking for Malfoy. He thought to catch him at something secret and spiteful and instead found he stayed late after Potions ended, Wednesdays and Fridays, working on his Advanced N.E.W.T. work. Harry under his cloak and Malfoy mostly alone, except for when his partner stayed too, to ask if she could copy from his notes.

"Your notes aren’t the issue.” His eyes darted side to side. “The way you stare at the back of Potter’s head like it might hold the keys to brewing a perfect Draught of Clarity might be. Why don’t we brew it again, together?" His face was as pointy as ever, and shiny from the steam off his brew, but he no longer held his lips in a tight, unpleasant line. They quirked up on one side. "Don't look so surprised. I need all the practice I can get, and you're only slightly better than Potter at Potions." 

"Bold to talk about your only friend like that," she said. She slouched, letting her bag fall from lowered shoulder to the worktop. “Who died and made you the Supreme Mugwump of having a pash on pretty Potter? Jealous, much?”

Harry held his breath waiting for disgust.

"It’s not like that," Malfoy smiled at the floor. “He’s got a bleeding heart and terrible handwriting. You should aim higher, frankly.”

Malfoy remained, in that way, a stubborn stone in Harry's shoe. Harry liked that he'd said what he’d said—to put the girl at ease. He didn't mind that Malfoy remained, forever, a little contrary. He was tutoring Hufflepuffs, for Merlin's sake.

Harry hated that he didn't mind.

4

Spring melted into summer. Malfoy's remedial Potions classes were well-attended by several eighth years, and he pitched in coaching the Slytherin quidditch team. He was no longer actively derided in classes, but still didn't feature at any parties. 

Harry found him asleep on the Slytherin common room couch. He nudged the bony hill of his ankle and watched Malfoy's nose wrinkle with displeasure. His hair was long, spilling over a fussy tube-shaped pillow of black velvet that wasn't meant to be slept on.

"Malfoy," Harry said. He cleared his throat. "Malfoy. Get up."

One eye blinked open. He scrubbed the stubble of his cheek and squinted at Harry.

"What on earth brought you down here to bless our cavern with your presence?"

Harry folded his arms. Malfoy made alarms go off in the back of his head, and there wasn't a reason for it. It was maddening to look at him.

"Where are you wearing robes? It’s Saturday."

Malfoy looked the long length of his body and curled onto his side. He blinked owlishly at Harry.

"What would you prefer me in?"

Harry mentally swatted the insinuation of his tone away. 

"Why aren't you in your own bed?" He wondered if the other Slytherins were still troubling him. He’d heard of the dousings of his sheets with Bubotuber pus.

"I'm fond of the—" Malfoy started to lie and Harry strode to the door he knew was his and pushed in and saw a room that looked like grief. A mess, reeking of apple cores gone sour and the sheets were twisted on the floor and shirts piled on the bed and there was a path to the closet but only one set of clean clothes hung on a solitary hanger and it fucking hurt to look at. There was a black shroud over the window. The wad in his chest lodged more firmly. 

"I never learnt how to…do anything." Malfoy edged sideways past Harry in the door to sit on a corner of bed without an object blocking his way. 

Harry pried his own jaw open to grind out words. He was furious already.

"What did you do to the house elves? Why aren't they coming in here anymore?" 

"Granger gave me a pamphlet. Terrible acronym, mind you, the girl's got no brain for marketing…" Malfoy twiddled his thumbs. "I asked them not to service my suite anymore, and they wouldn't hear of it, so I sent them away."

That was worse. It was worse, him being useless and alone by choice than him being useless and alone because he’d earned it. 

Harry taught Malfoy the incantations he'd learned at the Weasley's. He recited the things he'd learned at four, maybe five. 

"Start at the top and work your way down,” he said, and Malfoy nodded, wide-eyed. “Dust first, then a wipe. We’ll do the floors last.”

Harry held an armful of comforter that reeked of wet quidditch leathers and musky sweat and a scent that was too masculine and sharp for him. Harry learned it was a cologne he'd taken from his father's collection. 

"I snuck it out," he admitted when Harry picked it up. "I wasn't supposed to take anything from the…the house." 

"Don't worry," Harry said, turning over the bottle of amber glass. He flicked a look at Malfoy, attempting to radiate reassurance. He looked so fucking uptight, wringing his hands. Like Harry would smash it out of spite. 

"I won't tell the Aurors." 

It was the one thing kept upright on the armoire, not left where it was dropped like every other thing Malfoy touched and was too lazy too pick up. Harry pretended it was laziness and Malfoy let him because neither was prepared to admit that Malfoy was anything but lazy and that this mess was sadness, was the darkness that made it difficult to get up or do or be anything. 

Harry uncapped the bottle while Malfoy cleared away apple cores. He inhaled and was whisked back to the Potions dungeon on the wave of the specific scent that lingered when Malfoy worked there a while. It was the smell Harry hadn't realised he associated with remedial potions and now, intimately, with Malfoy's linens.

"You should make your bed every day," Harry said, putting the bottle away and tugging the shroud down from the window. "Stop sleeping on the sofa."

"That's the trick, hmm?" Malfoy knelt, dusting his side table with a scrap of cloth. It wasn’t sarcasm. 

"To what?"

"To claw my way back into society," Malfoy said, breezily. "That's what this is all about, isn't it? You can't stand seeing anyone fail as hard as this." 

He treated it all as a joke, a lark, his infinite loneliness. Harry closed his eyes and could only see Malfoy, concentrating deeply on how to wipe away dust stuck to a sticky spot. 

A group of words, nice ones, coalesced in Harry's mind. It seemed the only thing that made his eyes prickle anymore was seeing Malfoy like this. The way he was. Given up and yet, not quite. Scrabbling, however quietly, to hold onto the world that Harry desperately wanted out from.

"Look," Harry said, and then his breath caught because Malfoy did. Look at him, expectant. He trusted Harry, which was never good for anybody. Trust got people hurt, maimed, killed. Harry swallowed the nice words like shards of glass.

"You'll never make friends if you keep dressing like a fussy Pureblood all the time. Don't you own, like, jeans?"

Malfoy shook his head. 

Harry took Malfoy shopping. He was little help other than to tell him that he didn't have to wear a singlet under his button-down shirts but he should, because otherwise the look was very "nipply", and Malfoy puffed a breath of laughter and bought the vests and t-shirts and trousers in stately blacks and whites until Harry chucked a soft blue jumper at him, so Malfoy bought that too.

"Stop eating alone in your room," Harry told him, as Malfoy clutched the jumper to his chest and nodded. 

He followed the instruction and ate alone, a solitary figure hunched at the far end of the Slytherin table. Harry let it go on for a long week before he broke away from Ginny and Ron and Hermione on a late Sunday morning and loomed behind Malfoy until he turned around.

"Come on," Harry said. He didn't look anywhere but at Malfoy, knowing full well where most sets of eyes in the Great Hall were focussed.

Malfoy reeked of weed most meals. He played with his food, twirling his spoon through pudding before thoughtfully taking a single bite into his mouth. He sat to Harry's left, the last seat at the Gryffindor table, and everyone else to Harry's right. He often tucked a textbook under the lip of his plate, not in mockery of Hermione's habit but mirroring it. He drank his coffee black and ate croissants so fastidiously that not a single crumb made it to his lap.

The first time Ginny addressed him directly a month later, he looked up and around, unsure where his name had been uttered.

"Pardon me?" he said.

She rolled her eyes, chin resting on her palm.

"I said, do you fancy coming round for drinks later? Far side of the lake tonight. Last chance before exams and all." She looked at the Slytherin table and then back to Malfoy. "Zabini's friend's with Dean and said we should bring you. If you're not going to be a tosser about it."

Silence, into which Malfoy nodded. 

"I'll be there," he said to his soup, "with bells on."

5

Harry wasn't a go-getter. He floated through exams and into what was meant to be young adulthood and hid, tucked away in Grimmauld Place. He didn't have to choose any path in particular so he chose none at all. 

Ginny left for more school, and Ron for the Aurors, and Hermione to an internship, and Harry hosted the occasional party and went flying and that was fine, so far as he was concerned. He baked bread and wondered about a career as a baker, and collected offers for quidditch training camps and as the spokesman for various charities and the envelopes collected dust, torn open and unanswered.

A year came and went. He kissed his first boy on new year's eve and immediately Floo'd to Ron and Hermione's flat to drunkenly tell them about it. He slept on their couch and woke up without memory of any of it, so it was Hermione who had to convince him it had happened at all.  

"How do I know it wasn't a mistake?"

Hermione patted his head and handed him a coffee, a black pool to see his haggard self reflected in.

"You need to learn to trust your feelings," she said. Harry's mind went to one place when she said that, and the only thing that feeling made him was frightened.

It was chance that brought Harry to the second floor of Grimmauld Place on his birthday. He needed a breather from the roaring party happening outside and so hid in the dustiest corner of the house in an attempt to find away from it all.

The rotary phone on the wall vibrated with a shrill ring. It startled him into spilling the glass of water in his hand and set his heart to race. He'd given the number to a handful of people. He'd posted them letters shortly after moving in, letters he'd meant to reveal feelings in like I'm scared of living and dying in this big house alone and everything reminds me of Sirius and I don't know how to ask for what I want. He'd scrapped those attempts and instead scrawled the phone number and asked his tiny circle of found family to call if they ever needed him, night or day, it was like a Patronus only they could speak in real time, it wasn't an imposition, really, he'd love to—

"Hello?"

A surprised breath. Outside in the garden, a firecracker went off. Pop. Harry flinched.

"Hello?" he asked again. His palm on the receiver was damp with sweat. The breathing alone was enough to make his chest tight and he knew, then.

"H-hello. This is Draco Malfoy speaking." Harry rested his forehead to the wall and closed his eyes. His entire body sighed with relief.  

"Is that you, Potter?"

"This is Harry Potter speaking." 

Malfoy huffed a series of broken laughs and the wad in Harry's chest crumbled into a cloud of butterflies. They fluttered up Harry's oesophagus.

"Well done,” Harry twirled the cord around a finger. “You've figured out the most dastardly of Muggle inventions, the telephone."

"I've called to wish you a happy birthday," Malfoy spoke, barely louder than a whisper. "It's quiet, for a birthday. Are you doing something later?" 

"Everyone's outside. Malfoy, are you alri—"

"Yes, no, yes. I'm fine, thanks. Just wanted to say happy birthday."

"Yeah, thanks. I wrote you—"

"I got it." 

More explosions, and Harry clenched his teeth and wrapped the coiled cord another time around his fist. It had been silly for him to tell Seamus it was fine to bring them, when the sound and the sparks, the smell of the smoke, it was all too much and—

"Potter, are you still there?"

"Yes. You should come. If you'd like to, I mean." He remembered to breathe and adjusted the receiver between ear and shoulder to wipe his hands on his shirt. He envisioned Malfoy cradling the receiver on his end with caution, the way Arthur did. Like at any moment it might bite. 

"Oh. I couldn't," Malfoy whispered. He inhaled shakily. Harry had thought perhaps he was hiding his conversation from being overheard, but now he could only envision Malfoy making this call alone.

"You could, actually, very easily. You're the sort of person who gets invited to parties, now." 

Malfoy huffed. It was like he’d forgotten how to laugh properly. 

"It's rude not to respond when spoken to on a phone call, you know."

"I'm gay," Malfoy said. More muffled rustling, and then his audible breathing again. 

"Shit. Fuck, I'm sorry. You’re busy. I've been meaning to write you back but I couldn't and, I just—"

"Malfoy, please come over.” More rustling. The vision of Malfoy changed. Harry envisioned him in robes again, the way he'd dressed until Harry told him not to. Malfoy was on a single bed someplace, covering the mouthpiece with his sleeve to hide sounds from Harry. Harry could see the room—it would be small, and meticulously neat. White walls and a comforter that smelled of sandalwood and a sad little Malfoy that didn't know what to do in the centre of them. 

It hurt the way it had always hurt to talk to him. Harry didn’t have to see him to feel it again, that chasm. That yearning to close the space. 

“You have my address."

"But—"

"It's my party and I'm hiding from it,” Harry spoke quickly, the words tumbling out. “I’m on the second floor, and they’re lighting firecrackers, and it would be a favour to me." He took a deep breath in through his nose, annoyance spiking. "I hate firecrackers.”

“Did you hear what I said?” Malfoy asked. 

“Yeah." Harry’s heart was going to beat free from his chest. "I don’t know how to talk on the phone. I don't like not being able to see you—the person I'm talking to. Just come over, please?"

The line crackled. Harry loosened his grip on the phone cord and it left deep, looping welts across the back of his hand. 

"Could you bring me some weed? I can pay you for it, I could just really use a—"

"Alright," Malfoy said, before Harry managed friend. He hung up without saying goodbye and three minutes later the top stair creaked and there he was. In worn-in jeans with a torn knee and a band of red across his nose and cheekbones from sunburn and pink in the cheeks from something else. Malfoy was there.

"Hey," he greeted Harry. He cupped one elbow in a grip so hard his knuckles were white, arm crossed protectively over his body. He stood, tentative on some invisible threshold, and waited. 

"Thanks for not being weird," he said. Harry felt weird. He felt seen, and seen through, but he raised his chin at a table and chairs and Malfoy sat and Harry joined him. Malfoy pulled out his battered tin and papers and set to roll them a spliff like he had back at school. Harry reflected on how long his finger bones were, how practised at this thing. How many times had he watched them do this trick, this precise act he'd never mastered? His own fingers felt heavy and blunt in comparison. 

Malfoy did not look particularly well, but Harry had to be honest with himself for once. He thought, in the late honeyed light trickling in through the dusty window, that he found Malfoy’s points and hollows beautiful. 

The butterflies inside Harry turned to bees, buzzing so furiously he was sure to open his mouth, he'd throw up from nerves.

"There you are," Malfoy said, twisting the tip closed. "Please accept this as the most meagre present I could possibly muster."

"It's a fantastic present. I love it." 

Their fingers touched when Malfoy passed the joint to Harry. Malfoy touched him again, briefly, fingertips to the back of Harry's hand when he cupped it and lit the joint with the tip of his wand.

"I always thought it was strange—" Harry leaned back into his chair and held the initial pull into his lungs "—no one came out during our year."

His fingertips tingled when he passed the joint to Malfoy. He exhaled and his head went light as a feather. Malfoy noticed his flinch at the pop pop pop of firecrackers. He frowned and cast a charm at the wall, dampening the sounds of outside to nothing. 

Lights washed over his pale face, like he stood before a wall of painted glass. Red, blue, green. Malfoy's teeth shone when he smiled, and blushed. Nervous. Malfoy passed the joint back to Harry after a few puffs. He gripped the back of his own neck and dipped his head, hiding his face from Harry's scrutiny. 

Harry had been staring. His stomach was in knots, and he flushed, hot. He'd been staring at Malfoy's burn, and the tips of his ears revealed by the absence of his once-long hair. Harry puffed the joint again and tamped down the urge to cough. 

"Did you fancy someone, back then? In school, I mean." 

Malfoy broke his grasp and looked at Harry, pink-eyed from under a lashline like frost. His jaw hung open, and Harry didn't think he blush any harder until he did. 

"Not—no, no no, I didn't mean myself!" He choked on his spit and spluttered, coughing, waving his hands. 

"I'm not one of those people who assume you'd be into just anybody. I didn’t—not—I wasn’t saying it was me, obviously."

"Not you?" Malfoy asked. He took the spliff from Harry and put it out in a mug holding the dregs of last week's tea. His voice was quiet again like he’d been on the phone. 

"Yeah, no. Why would you? I was a dick to you all year." Harry washed his hands over his face and when he let his glasses fall back onto the bridge of his nose Malfoy was staring at him. His mouth was open, and his lips looked soft, and he still smelled like leather and musk and his quickened breathing was visible in the rise and fall of his collarbones.

"Potter…you were kind to me when you had no reason to be," Malfoy said. "You asked for nothing in return. I mean," Malfoy scoffed, incredulous, "you can be thick, but I didn’t think even you were this thick. Do you know that you’re being kind to me now?”

Harry frowned. “I told you to come over because I wanted to see you. This isn't charity. I didn’t ask you over out of the pure goodness of my heart.”

Draco’s smile was disbelieving. “You think that makes you selfish, don’t you? To ask for the company you want?” 

Harry shrugged, his chair creaking beneath him. 

"Merlin, you really are something," Malfoy sighed. He wiped his palms on his trousers and tapped them a few times, his sign of preparation to stand. To go. 

“Well. I've got my—uh, news, off my chest— and provided my meagre gift. So, yes, I've kept you plenty long enough. I'm sure you should go back to your party before they wonder where you've wandered off to.” 

"Don’t go,” Harry said. His blood rushed, nerves on high alert. The weed wasn’t doing anything to calm them. “Stay. Please. There’s, um, cake.”

“I don’t think it would be—"

“But I’ve missed you," Harry breathed the words. It sounded like a whine to his own ears. What should it matter to Draco, that Harry had missed him? That Harry wanted him to come downstairs and try the cake, and to sit next to him, to his left, because Draco was left-handed and that way their elbows didn’t bump while they shared meals, and he wanted to hide up here and sit and chat while the room grew to smell of him, wanted this, only this, wanted it for just one minute longer—

"And you didn't answer my question," Harry said. 

"That's because I don't have an answer you'll like," Draco whispered. 

They watched each other, neither moving. Both stuck like magnets to their seats. Harry tried to suck spit into his mouth, suddenly dry. He hadn't meant to admit to his longing. It lingered in the air between them, and Draco wasn’t responding, so Harry figured he might as well continue.

"I thought it was strange that no one came out our year. I wish someone had, then.” Harry had to look away. He picked at his thumbnail and frowned at his fingers. “I wish—" 

His greatest fantasy was to have his hands held. His palms itched with the want of it. He wanted to have someone hold on to him, a quiet way of saying they wanted to keep him. Maybe then, he’d stop floating away the way he felt he did. 

Draco reached out and touched Harry's knee.  “You wish?”

"Sorry. I’m making this about me,” Harry's reassuring smile faltered. The wad was back, a clog stuck in the chest. 

“I'm happy for you. I hope you're happy, too."

Draco's touch burned. His gaze did too. He looked at Harry like he was a puzzle to solve. Like he was seeing Harry completely anew.

“Is it about you, though? Isn't it?" He swallowed and withdrew his touch, hands cupping his own knees. "Even a little?” 

Harry pretended not to understand the question because Draco was very close, as close as he’d been in a year, and it was a tenuous closeness. He could go again and leave Harry alone, again, in the darkness. 

"Potter…”

Harry shook his head. “It's Harry. Please.”

“Harry,” Draco licked his lips after he said it, like it was a new flavour of word. 

“Harry," he repeated. He liked that flavour. 

"It's presumptuous that if I did have a pash, it would be on you, but…so what if it was?"

"Was what?"

"You," Malfoy said. He laid his arm down and outstretched his hand on the table, long fingers curled just so. An invitation.

Harry didn't normally do things tentatively, but he was careful with this. He brushed the soft skin at his wrist and delighted in Draco's shiver. After a moment, unsure, he pressed their palms together. He sighed an exhale he hadn’t known he was holding as Draco raised his hand and slipped pale fingers through Harry’s sun-darkened ones. Harry held his hand with intention, and the light in the room faded dark and pulsed yellow, yellow, yellow. It was warm in the room, and Harry should have known better a long time before, should have recognized what the cost had been to break his own heart over and over again. Each time he’d had the chance to reach out, to give shape and form and breath to his words, and had denied himself the simple pleasure of this. 

#mintamintawrites #prompts! #coming out #drarry #it's all angst all the time over here #yes #but it'll cost you #un-beta'd

[othernotebooksareavailable]

I make a nice stew based off some recipe I read online about a year ago I think, but it's a basic one and it's so delicious I'm writing it down here, with all my modifications, mostly in case I forget. It's pretty economical, especially if like me you have a sage bush growing outside (mine is indestructible, surviving -10c with a shrug). The recipe is flexible but here's the basics:

Ingredients:

Big handful of fresh sage

Biiig glug olive oil

2x tins of butter beans

2x tins tomatoes (I use any tin that catches my eye)

Tomato paste

Stock cube (I use low salt veggie stock)

Pinch sugar/teaspoon honey

Salt and pepper

Optional but recommended: sausages of choice (I use heck vegan Italia sausages when I can get them)

instructions:

Heat the oil in the heaviest pot you own. Wash and chop the sage and add to the pot and turn down the heat. The idea is to slow cook your sage, infusing the oil w flavour, not to make crispy (crispy sage is delicious, but not useful here).

Drain and wash beans and add to pot. Let them mingle with the sagey flavour a while. Then add the tinned tomatoes, tomato paste, stock cube, sugar, and salt and pepper to taste. Stir and let bubble a bit before turning down the heat. Cook low and slow until the sauce is thick. Takes up to an hour (if you have a slow cooker you could do this part easily). If you have sausages, chop them into bite sized pieces and add to the stew. They will enjoy themselves in there very much. Use your time on stew watch to consider your life, listen to a podcast, talk with visiting friends. It only needs stirring once in a while.

When it's all thick and stew like, eat. Makes many servings that should last you a few meals, depending on many factors too remote for me to know.

Try add-ins. For this batch I chopped some leek and mushroom and grated in some carrot because I have only been eating beige foods for a few days now. I bet a red chili would be good, but I let the sage take the stage as much as possible.

Let me know if you make this!

#cooking #a good stew recipe

[formosusiniquis]

oh please 🍓 !!

Sav!

You're gonna get tired of hearing this but your excitement and passion for your writing inspires me every time I see you talking about your latest wip. Your writing is amazing, I continue to think about some of the lines from slasherverse. (Currently doing a badkids d20 rewatch do not be surprised if you see me rocking through your d20 works). Your media tastes are impeccable, more powerful than any marketing team if I see you're watching something I bump it up my list of things to check out cause I know it's gonna be top tier. Your taste in general is absolutely top notch, every time I see you on my dash it makes my day a little brighter!

And this is more a comment, that sagey color you always use for your icons has become so ingrained in my brain with you that every time I see it irl I think of you

mutuals send me a 🍓 and I'll compliment you

#ask game #grasslandgirl #av reunion week when?

[lawmane-enthusiast]

AU Idea

I just came across a post mentioning Hanahaki disease, and it sorta sparked an idea inside me. Lawmane… except one of the two contracted Hanahaki disease due to their unreciprocated love for the other? If one of the two were to contract Hanahaki, I feel it would likely be L. It’s clear his crush on Misa wasn’t reciprocated, so if it grew to love, he’d be totally screwed. He’d probably hide the disease, likely because he was ashamed of having fallen in love with someone, and Light’s girlfriend for that matter.

If you’re not familiar with the term, Hanahaki disease is a fictional disease that arises when someone is in love with someone who does not reciprocate the love. It causes flowers to grow in the sufferer’s lungs and throat until they a) suffocate, b) get surgery to remove the flowers, which will not be a permanent solution, or c) have the person they were in love with love them back.

It’s also said that the flowers in the sufferer’s lungs will be the favorite flower of the person they are in love with. That’s definitely a cute detail, I’d include it in a Hanahaki! Lawmane fic.

Woo, if L got Hanahaki, he probably wouldn’t know what it was, and just write it off. But once the flowers had continued to appear for a long time, he would likely go to Watari or Soichiro for advice. He obviously would have to hide his ailment from Light, as Light would recognize the symptoms and want to know who it is that L is in love with. That would be difficult while handcuffed to Light and spending much time supervising Misa [since he suspects her].

Also, for Misa’s favorite flower, I’d have to say it would probably be some type of rose. And L would despise her for it, like he would hate the feeling of the thorns inside him but he wouldn’t be able to say ANYTHING.

I can imagine L hiding the affliction for so long, and then one day he’s locked in the bathroom trying to spit up the flowers before Misa and Light arrive back from a trip, and Misa ends up walking in on him. That scenario could go two ways, once she had found out everything that had transpired. She’d probably feel guilty for causing him to suffer, even if she had no control over it.

[Then she’d kiss him and all the flowers would disappear-! Just kidding, but that would be a killer ending.]

She probably *would* do that, actually. Light wouldn’t care because he didn’t love her in the first place, wait no, scratch that, Light would care because if L and Misa got together, he wouldn’t able to get Misa to do his bidding anymore. So she would go ahead and do that and Light would be temporarily salty but he would figure something out and all would be well in the world.

So, thanks for reading, I suppose.

I should probably write a oneshot for this AU, but I have so many oneshots I’m writing at the moment. I’ll do it some other time, or if someone else would be willing…? Anyway, I just want some Lawmane content that isn’t a smut oneshot. And I’m here to produce that content!

-Sagey

#lawmane #lawmane-enthusiast