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ulqueleleh · 6 years

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“Feelings I didn’t know I had” (James and Keith week 2018)

I FINALLY HAVE IT DONE!!!!!

Written for @jamesandkeith week.

Each day is part of the same story! I recommend to read from the first part, but you can read which ever you want!!!

Day 7: Pre-Garrison/Garrison Days/Post-war | James/Keith | 3k words | M | On AO3

He woke up to something tickling his nose, an unfamiliar but comforting smell filling up his lungs. He shifted and opened his eyes lazily, the black messy hair wrapped around haziness and sparks of the morning made him believe he was still asleep and dreaming. But the weight numbing his arm was real, as well as the heat from another body snuggling to his below the sheets and the touches that he could steal by moving his free hand, feeling the heartbeats steady and calm below ribs.

He sighed remembering what happened after the meeting, not actually believing it.

But Keith had kissed him, right after James dumbly almost broke his foot in half and had to get medical attention from him.

“You think?” he had spitted before he could stop himself, Keith pulling away from his hands and glaring at him, “You kissed me. Two fucking times. And you think you like me?”

Keith frowned, his face sharpening on the edges.

“I’m sorry?” he apologized poorly, “I thought you agreed with me kissing you.”

James felt his face blush more, stammering with his words.

“It’s not about…!” he tried to complain, the eyes staring at his face not helping at all, “How do you say you think when you did that kind of stuff?!”

Keith winced, his mouth twitching open for a second before closing in a tight line, his face reddening almost as much as how James felt his own.

“I’m new about this” he confessed shrugging, his eyes glued to a point in the wall that James ignored, “I didn’t think this was...”

James waited for him to finish his excuse, containing himself from kissing him again when he saw him bit his lip.

“I’ve been...” he continued, not following the line he drew before, “Since some time I...”

“Could you, please, finish at least one thing at the time?” James asked exasperated, feeling too dizzy to follow up his mumbling.

Keith scoffed.

“I’m sorry, okay?” he said agitated, not sounding as if he was really sorry, “I just noticed these feelings and my head is struggling to follow up!”

He felt his lungs push out all his breath.

“You just...?” he murmured frowning, Keith looking at him, “In this moment?” he asked confused, “Right now?”

Keith nodded, not understanding the breathless tone, and James almost felt himself faint in desperation.

“I’ve been head over heels for you since you even returned, Kogane” he growled holding his face in a rough movement, his shame not wavering at the anger, “Even before you went to your little space trip! And you just noticed?!”

“Since what?” Keith mumbled in disbelief and James clenched his teeth in a groan, pulling him into a harsh kiss that clacked their teeth together and cut his lip a bit.

Keith reciprocated immediately, his hands finding place in his shoulder and nape, his knee opening space between his legs and leaning into him. His lips parted in a sigh and Keith gripped him harder, deepening the kiss in something that was too inexpert for both of them, with no idea of how to follow up the other and being too stubborn to let the other lead the kiss.

Keith shifted and his foot hit slightly James’ injured one, making him jump to get away from the contact and open his mouth in a complain, but Keith just took advantage, exploring the insides of his mouth with his tongue without even knowing what he did. Keith took the lead with that, leaning over James in a way he loved, and his hair was gripped in a fist, pulling him off James kiss-bitten lips with a hiss.

“Stop,” he ordered in a growl to himself, but Keith did just as if it was for him, and he tried to calm down the growing heat inside his abdomen, the one that started in the meeting with a wild imagination and just kept growing bigger and hotter at Keith’s breath mixing up with his.

Keith moaned, deep and scratchy, and James felt it rumble in his chest, his ears melting away at the sound so alike a purr.

“What?” Keith said slurred, his nose and brow wrinkling in impatience.

“W-wait” he murmured looking away, having to take control of himself before he would jump over Keith mindlessly, and he was surprised when Keith actually waited, pulling away a little.

He stared at him, wary about the distance, and he saw him smashing his lower lip in a sign of nervousness, his face blushing to the end of his ears, and James stared at them, totally charmed by the color.

“Keith.”

His eyes, indigos despite the horrible blinding light of the infirmary, found his easily, softening in something James couldn’t help but get dazed.

“You stopped kissing me” he murmured, Keith frowning at the statement.

“You told me to” he said with an obvious tone, looking down to his hand holding away his shoulder, “and pushed me.”

James haven’t noticed that, and he stared at Keith in confusion, slowly comprehending what was wrong with him.

Keith wasn’t like the one on his dreams, always taking the lead and making him take what he had to give, despite how confused, scared or against it James was in his consciousness. The Keith on his dreams wasn’t inexpert, he wasn’t gentle, he didn’t respect what James told him. The real Keith was actually caring.

“Oh,” he sighed, Keith blinking curiously at him.

“Unless that wasn’t what you meant” he murmured slowly, looking down, “Is that one of those things you say but don’t really mean?”

James huffed.

“No, I...” he started in doubt, “It’s just...”

He couldn’t finish talking, too lost in the memory of all the dreams that kept him out of rest every night and how different and better it was from the reality standing in front of him, expectant of his next move.

“I’m... struggling too.” he whispered, huffing out a bitter laugh.

“Okay” Keith said fidgeting, as if he couldn’t keep himself still, “Look, I... I’m sure I like you, okay? I just...”

He bit his lip, and James stared at it too long.

“I just don’t-”

“Do you want to go to my room?” James found himself saying, Keith’s snapping a look at him.

“What?”

James hit himself in the back of his mind.

“I mean- I just- I didn’t meant to- I worded it wrong, I-”

“You want me to?”

James swallowed his words too roughly, choking.

“I...”

Keith shifted, his knees finding place on either side of his leg, and James stammered, his hands immediately grabbing his hips to still him.

“You...?” Keith encouraged him, his fingers reaching his cadet jacket and flicking the zipper.

James’ lungs gave out.

“I want…” he said breathless, his eyes staring down to their tangled legs and the hands on his chest, rubbing down wrinkles that weren’t there, “I’d like…”

Keith’s mouth curved up, a twist in the corner making him look gorgeously nervous, and he leaned down a bit, pursuing his lips and kissing James’ briefly.

“ ‘Kay”

James got up too quickly, almost punching off Keith from his lap, and took his hand rather roughly, pulling him towards the door when he suddenly remembered his injured feet, the pain shooting up his leg, and fell to his knees, Keith tripping behind him.

“Whoa, James!”

He cursed, gripping his feet, and he heard Keith laugh softly.

“You sure are eager” he heard him comment while going back a few steps and then crouching beside him, “Here.”

Keith took his hand and wrapped his arm over his broad shoulders, hugging his waist to help him get up without standing in his sore foot by helping him lean into his body. James glared at him, looking down to the hand on holding the side of his waist and finding his boot, and the shame just multiplied by ten, his face heating up in embarrassment.

“Shut up.”

“I didn’t say-”

“Just shut up.”

Keith laughed again, this time against his temple, and James snuggled a little closer while they got out of the infirmary, walking slowly because of James limp.

It took too long for them to reach the dorms, especially James’ room, but just when the door closed behind him, James didn’t let go of Keith’s body, lingering all the touches and kisses he would while they followed up to the bed.

And now he woke up to Keith’s messy hair tickling his face, and he felt as dreamy and hazy as when he fell asleep to fall into Keith’s arms.

He shifted a bit, snuggling closer, and Keith squirmed in his arms, turning his face to his cuddled in his shoulder.

“Hey...” Keith whispered, James scrunching his nose to the morning breath.

“Hey” he murmured, wrapping his arms around Keith’s torso and breathing in his hair, “It wasn’t a dream.”

Keith huffed, moving enough to face him completely, his legs tangling with his and his hands roaming his chest.

“You keep saying that.”

James bit his lip and leaned down to brush their noses together, Keith giggling softly.

“I...” James started, not really knowing what to come up with, “I know, it’s just...”

“You look well-rested" Keith pointed out, his fingers tracing circles in James’ shoulders so sweetly and mindlessly that caused him shivers, “You fell asleep before we even started getting it on, you know.”

James thumped his forehead into his, hissing at the pain of the forgotten bruise there and the laugh against his lips. In his defense, he hadn’t slept that well in weeks.

“Shut up.”

“You keep saying that, too.”

He knew that. Of course. But he couldn’t help it. All those things he thought of doing with Keith, all the kisses, or hugs, or touches. All the sounds he thought of hearing from him. All the actions and reactions Keith had to certain things he did; the low gasp when he buried his fingers through his hair, the tremble of his lips when he grasped his hips, the grasp of his nails in his back when he kissed him for too long.

And hearing his voice whisper his name, say out loud wishes or curses, voicing out all the thoughts that Keith really thought, not the things James wanted to hear and always heard in the haze of his dreams.

And maybe he didn’t have to say it, but he felt deceived if he kept it to himself, thinking that in any moment he would wake up to the darkness of an empty cold room, so he sighed and prepared himself to feel even more ashamed.

“I haven’t been sleeping well because of... dreams” he confessed, feeling Keith’s indigo eyes wander in his face calmly, “Dreams of you... of... you doing stuff to me...”

“Stuff?”

The slight tease in his voice made him clench his teeth.

“Good stuff” he answered shortly, trying to escape from the questions Keith would have but not really getting away from them.

“What kind of good stuff?” Keith asked, his hands starting to caress more deliberate in his skin.

“I...” he licked his lips, “Stuff like kissing me and... touching me?”

He felt Keith’s smile curve up more when he kissed him on the lips, squeezing his eyelids more.

“Kissing you...” Keith repeated, knowing exactly what he was doing, “And touching you...”

James contained a flinch, Keith’s fingers lingering over his skin in soft circles, going down from his shoulders to his chest, and lowering more until they stopped beside his navel, his abdomen tensing up.

“Something like this?” Keith teased, tilting his head a bit and hiding his face in the crook of his neck, leaving little kisses that were just mocking him and his imagination.

“Not... quite.” he answered with a sigh, gripping his head and pushing him to make him keep going, “Keith...”

“Yeah...?” he felt more than heard in his pulse, his breath coming short and his anxiety ripping down his spine to the steady touches in his abdomen.

“Please.”

He heard him swallow and lick his lips, gasping softly and stopping for a second.

“Can I?” he asked the same fucking question, and James groaned, shifting closer, “Can I do it like I do in your dreams?”

James squinted, opening his eyes and looking down to Keith’s black hair, darkening more his sight in the haze.

“No.”

Keith flinched, pushing away and gazing him startled, the shock and hurt clear in his eyes. James almost pinned him down the mattress.

“W-wha- I thought- But you- but-”

“You’re not a dream, Keith” he explained poorly, cutting off his stammering and holding his face carefully, “You’re so much better than that.”

Keith stared at him, looking lost, his pale skin starting to blush between his fingers, and James smiled briefly, kissing him in the mouth.

“I want you to touch me like you want” he murmured against his open lips, and the growl coming from his throat, made him shiver, “Please.”

The world suddenly tilted, and James found himself pinned against his bed, Keith nipping and kissing his neck in desperation. James tried to squirm out of his hold, but his wrists were trapped in Keith’s hands and he was unbelievable strong James couldn’t even move an inch from the sheets. He was groaning and rubbing against his body, his legs finding their way between his and his weight pushing down into his hips, James hitching them up mindlessly in an attempt to make something touch him.

But Keith didn’t let that happen, his own clothed hip getting away every time James tried, and he laughed mockingly when James groaned in frustration.

“What the hell, Kogane?!” he trashed to get free of his hold, and finally broke out of it, snatching Keith’s head and kissing him harshly on the lips.

There was a faint ring away of the bed, both ignoring it while the kiss turned sloppy and deep, their erections finally rubbing into the other despite the thin clothe of their boxers. Keith held his hair and pulled him, his neck straining in an arc, and attacked his skin all over again, this time leaving pulsating bites and love bites in every place he could.

The ring got louder just before stopping completely, and James sighed relieved at that, but the ring started again and Keith pushed away, snarling at the sound.

“What the fuck is that?!” he asked trying to find the annoying source of the noise, and James almost fainted at his larger and sharper teeth, his eyes yellow with a slit dark blue in the middle.

What the fuck is that?

“W-what?” he doubted, his voice trembling at the sight but something more blossoming in the depth of his abdomen.

But when Keith looked at him, the new look was gone.

“James?” he whispered lowly, closing the distance between their faces to look at him, “What’s wrong?”

James didn’t know. Well, he knew, but he didn’t know how to explain it. Was that his imagination or...?

The ring started again, and Keith huffed, getting off James’ body and reaching for his clothes, searching in the pockets until taking out his pad. His face paled at the flashing screen.

“Shit” he cursed before getting up and answering with a swipe of his thumb, “Yeah?”

James couldn’t make out the words from Keith’s pad, but he recognized Shiro’s startled voice, making him seat down in the bed a little concerned.

“W-what? But...” Keith looked at the screen briefly before putting the pad to his ear once again, “I... I’m sorry, I just...”

Keith glanced at James and trailed off, biting his lip before getting up and gather his clothes, his pad being left at a table while the speaker went on.

“I overslept, and the alarm didn’t go off, and...”

“You overslept?” Shiro’s voice asked in disbelief, and James startled at it, Keith putting up his index finger to his lips to stop him from making a noise, “I went to your room, Keith. You weren’t even there. And Krolia didn’t see you last night.”

Keith bit his lower lips, his concern drawing together his eyebrows. But he pushed up James instead of answering, pushing his clothes into his arms to get him to get dressed.

“Keith? Are you there?”

“I am” he said over his shoulder, putting on his shirt while James buckled his pants, “I’m sorry, I didn’t- I just- I'm going, okay? Don’t worry, I’m in my way and-”

“Where were you last night?”

Shiro’s question froze them up, James tripping with his injured foot while putting on his boots and letting out a hiss of pain, Keith snatching his pad and turning off the speaker.

“I just had a walk, okay?” he said glancing worriedly at James and asking silently if he was okay, “A very long walk, and I just fell asleep and- You know what? I’ll tell you after the meeting, yeah?”

James tied his boots and stood up, getting dust off his uniform and glanced at Keith, catching him frowning at him.

“Shiro?”

There was no immediate response, and James felt his stomach twist, but Shiro sighed and answered, telling other things to Keith while both finished dressing.

“Yeah, see you.”

Keith hung up, sighing loudly, and James huffed, looking to his mirror briefly to straighten his hair.

“We have to go.” Keith said going for the door, but James holding his hand stopped him in the middle of the room, stilling when James’ hands fixed up the collar of his uniform.

“There,” he said letting his touch linger a bit on Keith’s chest and looking at it nervously, “Let’s go.”

Keith huffed and pulled him into a short kiss.

A short kiss that wasn’t even short to begin with and had to stop when James’ pad started ringing in his jacket, this time both running to the door and almost tripping in the corridor.

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safasaf2018 · 6 years

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Day 7 - 6/8/18

9:36 AM

SO MANY ANIMALS EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!! I woke up early this morning to pack for our weekend trip, and went to the café to get a quick breakfast. The worker there recognized me from going in so often, and this morning asked me in French how I was today, starting a conversation which is pretty rare and a huge milestone for me, but I wanted nothing to do with his French because now I know how to order in Arabic! So I looked at him and said "bghit…" which means "I want" and his eyes lit up as he realized that I was going to attempt to order in Arabic for the first time!!! "Ahhh!!! Shnu bghiti?" (What do you want?") he asked me with a huge smile. "Bghit… khawa." (coffee) "l’ma" (water) he got those for me and asked if I was French or American. "Ana Amrikia!" I responded. He then told me in French that he couldn’t tell because my French accent was very French, so I explained that I had lived in France for 11 months. Then my friend Victor came up and also ordered in Arabic. He wanted the same thing I got (an espresso, a water bottle, and a croissant) so he said "hahta ana" (Me too) and the worker taught us how to say "the same thing". The worker was in such a good mood and so happy because we were ordering in Arabic, it was so great!! We’re leaving until Sunday right now and I’m already going to miss the campus while we’re gone. Anyways now we’re on the bus, and our professor told us we may see some monkeys on the way to the hotel. Well guess what! We not only saw monkeys, but were able to pull over, get out, buy a bag of peanuts for 10 dirham ($1) and feed the monkeys!! There were a bunch of mother monkeys carrying newborns either on their back or hanging from their chests, there were younger monkeys independent of their mothers but still smaller than the rest, there were obviously alpha males, monkeys fighting in trees, monkeys coming up to us on the ground, it was an insanely great surprise. The students joked that I should pick them up and see if they bite me, but I was seriously considering it! Kidding. But I did pet a few. After about 15 minutes of a group of 13 kids from around the world in absolute bliss and bewilderment, we’re not back on the bus passing by herds of sheep, donkeys, cows, wild birds, dogs, huge markets, people riding horses with packages on their backs, it’s amazing. Herders gathering their animals, mothers leading their children through the fields, beautifully vibrant yellow, purple, and red flowers, rugged mountains with gorgeously soft looking valleys, rocks covered in some purpley moss that for some reason makes me think of the trolls in the movie Frozen, huge storks nests on every telephone pole and roof, rock formations that make me think of the inukshuk at our family lake, it’s breathtaking. Tonight we’re staying at a hotel, and then tomorrow we overnight in the desert!!!!!! This is the first year the program has done a full on overnight in the desert - most years the students go to the desert, eat, go back to the hotel, and then wake up super early to go back to the desert to see the sunrise, so this year the professor is just letting us overnight (although he said we probably won’t be sleeping much) while he goes back to the hotel. As I’m writing this we’re passing by so many more sheep, goats, donkeys, it makes me so happy to see so many animals - some wild, some with their owners, we’re seeing small makeshift nomadic type shelters alone in vast valleys with two people tilling land a short distance away from them. I’m listening to my traveling playlist looking out the window imagining I’m in a travel movie/vlog, as my friend and I used to say when we felt completely at peace and happy, "I’m set".

2:50 PM

About an hour and a half left of driving! We stopped at a restaurant in the middle of nowhere for lunch, which was in the most beautiful restaurant. The outdoors were full of colorful mosaics and green trees, and the inside was beautifully furnished with upholsteries and chandeliers, all of equally impressive color. All of the small towns we drive through are filled with color. I ordered my meal in Arabic and said "thank you very much" in Arabic which made the waiter smile, and afterwards the professor asked where the bathrooms were so we could go before we got back on the road. Even though he’d already asked I said "Wait I want to ask in Arabic!" and asked the owner who smiled and told "to the right" in Arabic. Across the street from the restaurant was a man selling "meteorites", aka cool rocks, geodes, and fossils so I ran across with two other students. He brought out a special case with perfectly fossilized snails and spiders that were beautiful, and those were 170 dirham. So I asked him what I could get for 10 dirham which is all I had, and he gestured towards everything on the bigger table. I picked up a black rock with purple crystals inside, and he agreed to let me have it for 10 dirham, and then gave me a plant fossil for free. Then we got back in the car and I fell asleep for a quick nap. When I woke up we were in one of the vast valleys with very little plants. Then we went up another mountain where trees started reappearing, but only very small ones. We passed a small river that was absolutely gorgeous - there trees and flowers, grasses, bushes, green and colors everywhere, surrounded by dry barren yellowy rock and sand. A little later on we saw a pretty small lake, but very big for its location, with surprisingly little greenery around it like the river, but still an impressive body of water to see in the middle of the dry mountains. Then we stopped at a convenience store where we bought water and snacks, stretched our legs, and got back in the bus onto our next destination. One thing I’ve noticed about Morocco is that almost everyone you see seems to be working - painting a wall, throwing bricks up to someone on a roof, repairing a sign, working in a field, etc. We’re getting closer and closer to the desert now which means that it’s becoming harder and harder to see things far away because of the sand in the air, and we’re seeing less green except in towns wealthy enough to afford sprinklers and irrigation, and near natural bodies of water, but it’s very spotted and spread out. But everywhere we drive there are people sitting on the side of the road, napping in the shade, for fear of appropriating anything, it’s really cute.

5:17 PM

After quite a drive through mountains and valleys we finally stopped above the oasis where we’ll be staying tonight. We all got out and met two guides who live in the oasis village, with a population of about 350 people. The bus drove down one way and we took another route - about an hour long walk through palms, wheat, bamboo, alfalfa, over irrigation and the Ziz river which is the source of this oasis. We found frogs and turtles and one donkey who one of the guides tried to catch so I could pet his ears, but failed so we moved on. The walk itself was absolutely crazy. Imagine some fake safari you’re walking through with natural palm tree canopies, wide open fields, winding creeks you have to jump over, wild flowers, it’s exactly like that only it’s NATURAL it’s real and made naturally, not made up out of the imagination. Pictures I took while walking today resemble so closey pictures I’ve taken at zoos and theme parks who try to imitate it. At the end of the walk we finally came to the very small village where the guide invited us into his home where he and his entire family live. They served us tea, dates, and bread with fig sauce and olive oil. We met his very young children, sat on the couch, and ate and drank for a bit. The house had a flat roof made of bamboo and a dirt floor with a beautiful rug, and thick dense clay walls with only one window to keep the heat out. We all talked to the very young girl who was very shy, asking her what her name was, telling her she’s beautiful, etc. and we finally took a picture and now we’re back in the bus on our way to the next location! The village seems very peaceful, little boys riding donkeys to the river to swim, a father teaching his son to ride a motorbike, daughters with their mothers making scarves. Oh shoot we’re getting out of the bus, gotta go!

5:37 PM

Back, we just got off at an older part of the village to see where our guide and his family used to live. We saw a donkey! He was tied to a tree so this time I just went up to pet it and everyone watched from a safe distance. They’re so weird about animals.

6:10 PM

Arrived at the hotel! The boys are on the second floor and the girls are up on the top floor which is essentially a roof with rooms coming out of it. The view is absolutely beautiful - we can see the tops of the trees of the oasis and the mountains behind them. We were told there’s wifi but it’s really weak so hopefully I’ll be able to publish my blogs still!

10:23 PM

After unpacking we had a few hours until dinner which was at 8:30 so that those who were fasting could eat with us. We spent that time in the lounge on the second floor playing cards, talking about racism and colorism, some students were teaching each other how to stretch certain muscles, it was a nice time. Then we went downstairs for a "fashion show" at 8:00. The women who run this hotel also run a weaving business where they make scarves, pillowcases, rugs, tapestries, etc. so they dressed us all in traditional marriage/post-wedding dress which consisted of an ornate underdress that went down to our feet, a huge piece of fabric wrapped around us like a shawl tied with a belt, a head scarf with bells around the border, and an additional small black shawl to put around our shoulders. The black shawl had a colored checkered border that she explained was the specific colors and order of colors of her tribe so that in public if they come into contact with another tribe, they’ll know immediately what tribe they belong to. They then marked our faces with saffron oil to mimic tattoos that tribal women used to get before they converted to Islam where tattoos aren’t allowed. The men then got in a thin overdress type thing with a small turban looking scarf on their heads called a "tarbush". We then all lined up girls on one side guys on the other, and the mother of the hotel’s owner led us through a traditional wedding dance while her grandson filmed us. After that we all peeled off our layers and sat down to eat a delicious meal of a traditional Moroccan salad and rice and vegetables. The traditional Moroccan salad consists of cooked or raw vegetables all at room temperature separated on a plate, each one with its own unique subtle spice or sauce added to it. After dinner we all went to the common area and sat down with the owner, a woman. She explained to us that in her tribe women have always had more freedom than men. She explained that if a woman is sexually harassed, her abuser has to take his family and move out of the village - no council or anything, if a woman says something happened, people take her word for it. Because the consequences are so severe, false accusations are practically nonexistent. She told us that men can’t have more than one wife, that in a divorce the women can remarry, that men take care of children during marriage, that they’ve historically had women leaders, etc. And since converting to Islam they’re disappointed to see that women have less freedom. The owner is on her tribal council, has been for 9 years, and she’s the first and only woman ever to do so! She said that even now, 9 years later, they’re constantly analyzing her every move, trying desperately to find something she’s doing wrong so they can kick her off, but that she has a lot of supporters who encourage her which she will never forget. When she was younger she went to university and studded Moroccan politics and law, and when she came home she didn’t want to sit idly by waiting for the government to find her a job, she wanted to start her own business, so she started the weaving and then eventually opened the hotel and worked in tourism, where the English and French she polished in college came in handy. She was really so impressive, and said that she and the other women of her tribe are working hard to share the ideals of their tribes in terms of women’s freedom and rights. After that we all went upstairs, and since the girls have the third floor which is just a roof, we all laid down and looked at the stars. After a while we invited the boys up to join us. We challenged ourselves to five minutes of silence which was tricky at first, but eventually we got it and then decided to stay silent for longer. The light was on and we couldn’t figure out how to turn it off but the front desk worker, the owner’s son, came up and turned it off for us. After a while people started to go downstairs, and three of us decided to sleep up on the roof. We brought our blankets and pillows out and made a bed on the roof. I was worried we’d get in trouble for that, but the owner’s son apparently offered to bring us up a rug! So he brought one up, I practiced introducing myself in Arabic which he apparently thought was pretty funny, and now we’re all lying under the stars on a rug underneath the thickest softest blanket I’ve ever experienced. The breeze is the perfect temperature, there’s almost no noise except for the occasional dog bark or donkey in the distance. I wish I could capture the exact feeling of sleeping on this roof like you can capture a picture. I even wish I could just take a picture that accurately portrays what I can see here, but my camera can’t capture the subtle light differences like my eyes well enough to show anything but a black screen. Oh well. Tomorrow we ride camels!!!

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musicmapglobal · 7 years

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Tapecut

Born in Armenia and raised in Russia, Tapecut takes tired old genres and turns them into something completely original. From the warped trap of his recent Biaoji EP to the utter gorgeousness of ‘Time To Go’, a downtempo torch song featuring vocals from L.A.’s Vada, the only thing you can expect from Tapecut is that whatever he produces will be far from formulaic. Check out our interview below.

Tell us about your artist name…

Hello there, my name is Alik. I was born in Armenia but my parents decided to move to Saint-Petersburg when I was one year old, and they took me with them. I make multi-genre music and my goal is to create something really new. Why tapecut? Because I used to cut samples from old vinyl records. TAPE – like some record.

What sort of music did you listen to growing up?

I was listening to a lot of bass music like Mr. Carmack, Ta-ku, etc.

When did you start making your own music and what was it like?

I started to make my own music when I was about 13 years old. First time I met my first DAW FL Studio in 2008, and then I started to try to make some beats, and all that became bigger than a hobby since that moment.

What equipment do you use now?

I use Macbook and Sony MDR EX15LP Earphones.

Where would be the perfect place to listen to your music?

Hm, I think SoundCloud is the best place for it.

What fuels your creativity?

Actually, always different things can inspire me. It can be some specific sounds and some good or bad mood.

‘Time To Go’ is a beautiful track. Can you tell us a bit about it, and how the collaboration with Vada came about?

Thank you, yes, sure. It’s a long story. I met my love in Minsk (Belarus) and I spent with her about a few months and it was time to go back home for a few weeks, she was at the hospital at that moment, and I was thinking about coming home to Saint-Petersburg. I didn’t want to go there, but it was time to go. I can tell you this is a track where you can see the history. You felt in love, everything’s cool, and you have to go, that’s why I used sounds of a train in the track, and then a short сhime. At that moment you understand that it was just a dream, and you woke up and everything’s good again.

I like Vada’s vocals, she sounds really lovely, she suits perfect with this track though.

What do you think the future of music is going to be like?

I really don’t know. There are a lot of genres that appear every day. So I can not say anything about it. I do what I do and each day I try to get better.

Can you send us a photo of the view from your window?

🇦🇲 🇷🇺 Born in Armenia and raised in Russia, @tapecut brings us this #ViewFromMyWindow, check whole interview 👉🏻 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . #tapecut #Trap #Electronic #HipHop #stpetersburg #russia #armenia #downtempo #soundcloud #producer #downbeat #vocals

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Who’s your biggest local musical influence, past and/or present?

I think it can be BMB Spacekid and CVPELLV.

What are the top things you’d suggest visitors to St Petersburg should go and see/do?

I’d suggest to read more about Saint-Petersburg, because it’s called a ‘museum under the open sky’.

What are the best music venues and record shops in the city?

Unfortunately, our city is not developed well enough to have so.

What’s the biggest challenge facing musicians in Russia right now?

A lack of good managers and promoters. We do have talents, but they can’t express themselves.

Where in the world would you most like to perform?

I’d like to perform in LA, because I dreamt to go there since I as a kid.

What’s your favourite album of all time?

My fav album is Schoolboy Q – Blank Face.

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What’s your favourite track of 2017 so far?

My fav track of 2017 is Childish Gambino – Terrified (Zikomo Remix).

#BMB Spacekid #Childish Gambino #CVPELLV #electronica #future beats #Mr. Carmack #russia #saint petersburg #Schoolboy Q #Ta-ku #tapecut #trap #vada #Zikomo

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