#darth vader accidentally adopts his own son

[radioactivepeasant]

Fic Prompts: The Star Wars Wednesday Menace

(This came from a crack-treated-seriously idea I was throwing around with -- and at -- my friends where Vader didn't suppress his Anakin side as much as he thought, and he keeps finding himself amused by the trouble that pesky Death Star Pilot causes. Sometimes he lets him escape on purpose, just to see what he'll do next. He kind of tries to stealth-train him, like Maul and Ezra)

“Oh, the Force is certainly with you, boy.” 

Vader easily sidestepped the blade with good humor and parried. “But you are no Jedi.”

“I will be!” the Boy snarled.

Oddly, that seemed to make Vader almost falter.

“You’re...very certain that’s what you want?” he asked suddenly. He caught the Boy’s blade on his own and held it effortlessly. “Have you truly considered the cost of such a commitment?”

The Boy -- one of these days Vader was actually going to learn his name -- glared up at him from those too-familiar eyes. “Scared of what I’ll become, Vader?”

It was a childish taunt, and not one that should have rankled. And yet, somehow, it did. What would the Boy become? Vader pressed his attack a little more forcefully than he needed to. The Boy stumbled, barely able to parry in time.

“You are naive!” Vader snarled. “You play at war like it’s a game! Knights and dragons, like the child you are!” He swung, and the Boy ducked quickly. “Do not be so quick to swear oaths of loyalty to Orders you know nothing about! You do not yet know what you will be asked to sacrifice in return.”

The Boy was taken aback by this. He drew back a foot or so, holding the lightsaber in a guard position. He was cautious now, more so than before. He tilted his head and blinked slowly -- curse him, why did he have to look so much like Anakin he had once imagined his child might? Why was he so familiar? 

“You aren’t talking about me, are you?”

Vader cursed himself, and the Boy, and that inconvenient soft spot he’d inexplicably developed for an enemy. 

“Your insight serves you well,” he grudgingly allowed. “Behold: a cautionary tale made flesh. Do not put your trust in the wrong people, Boy.”

“Will you stop calling me that?!” the Boy protested.

Vader scoffed. “I do not know your name. What else would I call you?”

The Boy opened his mouth to argue, and abruptly closed it again. After a moment, a shrewd light entered his eyes. Vader had seen that look before. It usually heralded the little Rebel doing something infuriating and yet endlessly amusing.

“I’ll tell you my name, Vader,” the cunning brat offered, “After you tell me why you’re a cautionary tale.”

“You are blackmailing me?” Vader casually twirled his lightsaber and circled the Boy. “Ha! You imp. Very well, but do not think I’m going to let you live long enough to tell your Rebel friends.”

The Boy mimicked the twist of his blade -- much more smoothly this time! He was progressing! -- and flashed a cocky grin. “Yeah? That’s the same threat you made the last time I escaped. And the time before that.” 

“True, that is true,” Darth Vader acknowledged. “You are becoming quite accomplished at that.”

Indeed, the last time I did not even have to help you “escape”. 

He thought for a moment, then switched off his blade. Their battlefield was so cluttered with the collateral damage of a Rebel skirmish that it was not difficult to find a still-smouldering piece of an AT-ST to sit on.

Why did he feel the need to advise this young Rebel? What purpose did it serve to coddle him so much? If he was just going to take him as his apprentice either way, he didn’t really need to put so much effort into winning his trust, did he? Well, perhaps he did. It was clear that the Boy was learning in leaps and bounds from their little game, though he would no doubt be loath to admit it. He wanted to outdo Vader. Spite was a very effective motivator.

And besides, perhaps playing the mentor just a little more than usual would serve to make the Boy drop his guard just that little bit more. 

That didn’t mean it was a story he liked to tell. But he had come too far to back down now.

“I...once trusted a man to save my family from imminent death,” Vader said slowly. Reluctantly. “I first went to the Jedi. Yes, your beloved Jedi, for help. And they advised me to “let go” and allow my pregnant wife to die.”

He sensed confusion from the Boy. Then disbelief and suspicion, slowly leveling out into recognition that he was telling the truth. That, and dull horror. Well, that was a bit more validating than he’d expected, wasn’t it?

“The Jedi failed me, Boy. And so I turned to the Sith. He had the power to preserve one’s life force, by drawing on the Dark Side of the Force. He still does, in fact. I have witnessed it.”

“Oh. Great.” The Boy shuddered. “That’s...good to know.”

“Such was my thought. But as you do not seem to understand yet, despite your accent clearly marking you as coming from Tatooine, nothing is done for free. There is always a price, Boy. Always.” Vader turned the hilt of his saber over in his hands slowly. “To prove my loyalty, I was commanded to kill the Jedi. All of them. And I did so, without question: he insisted that I wholly cut myself off from my past so that he could be assured of my future loyalty. Only then would he fulfill his side of the bargain.”

The Boy took another step back, repulsed. “You...you killed hundreds...thousands of Jedi...because someone told you he refused to save your wife and baby otherwise? You just handed your family over as hostages because somebody said they could help you? That’s a Hutt’s bargain, are you nuts?! Why didn’t you just take her to a doctor?!”

Anger crawled up Vader’s throat like acid. The Boy did not know what he was talking about. Nor did he seem to remember to whom he was speaking. You will learn, my reluctant apprentice. 

“Doctors do not understand ailments predicted by the Force,” he said harshly. “No one else was willing to help me but an old mentor and scholar with seemingly noble purpose. Does that not seem familiar to you? I rashly swore my allegiance just as you seem to have.”

With a hiss, the Boy’s lightsaber flicked off and hung useless at his side. He sank into a crouch, just watching him. Those eyes, Anakin’s eyes, held a terrible, knowing, look. A haunted look.

“He didn’t save her, did he?” the Boy whispered.

He sounded as though he wanted to be sick.

“No, Boy. He did not.” Vader’s fists tightened over the hilt with a creak. “But by then, I had cut off my own retreat. There was nothing else left but my vow to his Order.” 

It burned, even letting someone he intended to take as a padawan know anything about his past. It burned to admit that he had been deceived. That he had met the fate he tried to avoid on the path he took to escape it. It stung that this Rebel’s child was nearly the age The Baby would have been.

The Dark Side flickered warmly around him, taking his pain and anger and sorrow and exchanging them for raw power. Padme was gone -- forever beyond his reach. As was the child he had never gotten to meet. To hold.

“That’s why you killed him?”

Vader looked up in time to see the Boy grit his teeth and turn his face away.

“It’s not fair.” 

“What is not fair?”

A spike of anger, bright and sharp, burst through the Force for a moment.

“Why was my family less important than yours?” the Boy challenged. “Why, Vader?! I lost my father because you thought you might lose your family?”

“I did lose my family!” Vader roared. He leapt up, blade at the ready again. “What do you know of such matters? Tell me! What would you have done for a chance to save your father, Boy?”

He brandished the lightsaber threateningly. “Speak up! Look at you. Look at me! That you are so eager to avenge him is answer enough.”

He stormed forward before the Boy had a chance to stand, and leveled his sword at the Boy’s throat. “Do not be so quick to deal out judgement, Boy,” he hissed, “You are already blindly following a path not unlike mine.”

The Boy stared mutely up at him with wide, panicked eyes. His presence in the Force reeked of fear, and the Dark Side absorbed it eagerly. Darth Vader contemplated killing him then and there. But his hand would not move. He knew full well that he couldn’t make himself do it. Not when he’d already put in this much effort to teach the boy.

With a disgusted sound, the Sith deactivated his lightsaber and turned his back on the Boy.

“Go,” he growled, “Before I change my mind.”

The Boy scrambled to his feet and wasted no time in getting out of range. Strangely, at the very edge of their battlefield, he hesitated.

“Leave me!” Vader snarled at him.

There was a limited time before his temper snapped. If the foolish child didn’t get out of the way, he would only have himself to blame.

“Skywalker.”

The world stopped, like an unwound clock. Even the motes of dust seemed frozen in place. Blood roared in Vader’s ears as he slowly turned to look up at the boy at the top of the crater.

“What did you say?” 

The Boy raised his chin.

“My name. It’s Luke Skywalker.”

He didn’t wait to see if the name rang a bell. He didn’t stop to ask if Vader remembered his father yet. He just ran.

Darth Vader stood motionless in a field of debris.

Skywalker.

Skywalker?!

LUKE.

The name that she’d picked!

The face that seemed so familiar-

His eyes-!

Barely twenty. 

He was barely twenty.

The pieces fell into place almost too quickly, carried along on the reproachful whisper of the Force. Light Side or Dark, he could not tell.

And you just let him go like this? 

Vader whirled.

“Luke!” 

#star wars wednesday #star wars au #accidental apprentice au #luke skywalker #darth vader #darth vader accidentally adopts his own son #luke isn't thrilled #inspired by gilgamesh from the final fantasy series #a darth vader who's a terror to the ones he hates but he's almost good-natured with the ones that amuse him #fic prompts #writing prompts #the Accidental Apprentice AU idea is an open sandbox! Have fun!

[disregardcanon]

A few thoughts on Star Wars characters in descendants au

1. Luke and Leia are not only Isle kids, they’re big deals like Mal and Uma because Vader is terrifying and he’s also the only semi good parent on the island, so people know not to fuck with his kids

2. Han is an isle kid who was mainly a free agent until he decided that he liked hanging with Vader’s kids better. He’s two years older than the twins, with big brother Chewie a few years older than that in his early twenties.

3. Lando is a prince, and if we’re going full on au THE prince who invites the isle kids to stay. He wears capes all the time and is fantastic

4. Sabine is an isle kid because after the war on Mandalore both factions of death watch were banished there. She and Ketsu used to have their own little band before Ketsu joined Uma’s crew and Sabine decided she’d try her lot with Mal’s. There’s some cool hair there and it would piss off her ex girlfriend, so why not?

5. Conflicted over Auradon Ezra since his parents were rebels or isle Ezra who’s like, Jay’s cousin since STREET RAT.

6. Hera and Kanan aren’t royalty, but they’re well-respected in the Auradon world and if Ezra IS in Auradon he’s their adopted son, if not he and Sabine are going to accidentally become that way.

7. Cassian, Jyn, and Bodhi are all Isle kids who *Ariel voice* want more. Jyn has the best isle dad, including Vader.

8. Ahsoka and Obi-Wan are both public figures who are against the isle thing but people discount their opinions because they think the opinions of people who love Darth Vader are invalid. They descend on Luke and Leia like the loving aunt and uncle they are the second they’re off the isle

9. Satine is still ruler of Mandalore and Bo-Kalyan’s on the isle, as well as Mail. It’s ugly.

10. Wait actually I don’t know how it works but Ezra is Maul’s son. Thank you have a good night

#sw descendants au #ketbine

[shizekarnstein]

N, T, U?? :>>>

<3

N- Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

Fruits basket: honestly my experience in this fandom has been... wondeful so far. I'm genuinely surprised by how nice the majority of you all are, and how everything is properly tagged and how when sometimes when I enter the tag yes there are a couple of posts debating certain points from different perspectives but always in a polite fashion! Yeah there are ocassionally bothersome anons but most of the time it's really... nice to be here. So one of my whishes is for that healthy atmosphere to continue. As for especific content mmm maybe for metas about the curse lmao yeah I could write but the more the merrier 😂. Also... it would be nice :) if some people would stop making Yuki and Tohru's relationship :) about kyoru :)

Snk: 1) could you all tag your shit properly. Like a post is an edit about Armin and it's tagged as rivamika or erehisu CHILL PLS. 2) For people to stop bothering others for liking a fictional character and accusing said fans of being idk horrible human beings for being invested in certain characters regardless of what they do in the story. (With that same logic all SW fans are garbage human beings for stanning Darth Vader lmao). 3) For ship wars to fucking stop god you're all so annoying. 4) For fans to take a page out furuba fandom and learn to let people be for not agreeing with your personal takes on the story or characters. Also 5) Imagine a fandom where people idk MADE their own opinions instead of automatically adopting whatever the most popular "meta blogs" decide?? That would be nice :).

T- Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending?

AS A MATTER OF FACT OF COURSE I DO.

Fruits basket:

Yuki and Kyo eventually tell Tohru about their side of the Hat story.

Yuki Sohma definetly caused the ruin of numerous cafes and restaurants by attracting hordes of rats every time he went to eat out there. Shigure still finds it hilarious to this day.

Yuki once enrolled in cooking classes bc he wanted to surprise his friends and girlfriend with a homecooked meal. All his classmates were terrified of him and his instructor cried when he finally withdrew. Of course he's stubborn and continued to practice in his apartment. It didn't end well. The firefighters know him by name levels of didn't end well. Finally both Machi and Tohru take pity of his ass and teach him. Under their careful guidance he eventually learns how to make rice and soup.

Tohru Honda daughter of Kyoko Honda defiently knows how to throw a punch and one day when she and Kyo were fighting/flirting without realising she catches him off guard and accidentally gives him a black eye. Tohru spent the evening trying to apologize while pressing a bag of frozen peas to Kyo's face while he was like... in awe bc HIS GIRLFRIEND IS SO STRONG. When Arisa finds out what happened (bc Tohru totally called her) she almost dies laughing her ass off and never let's Kyo forget that happened.

Snk:

Carla Jaeger most certainly taught his son how to cook and he's very good at it. Roping him into helping her cook was one the only ways she could keep an eye on him and be sure he wasnt fighting or getting into trouble all over the town so she commited to her plan. It went better than either of them expected.

Jean had a crush on Eren at one point and no I'm not taking criticisms. One day he was busy glaring at him for walking alongside Mikasa and suddenly he was like... huh Eren's pretty cool actually. I admire him. Right??? And he spent days agonizing wondering if he wanted to be Eren (to be close to Mikasa) or if he LIKED Eren too and his poor bisexual ass suffered so much. Those were the days he was so frustrated with his double crush he would find any excuse to start a fight. Btw Sasha saw right through him and Jean still doesnt know how on earth she noticed.

U- Three favorite characters from three (two) different fandoms, and why they are your favorites.

Fruits basket: You all know Yuki is my sun and stars like I'm not exactly subtle. So instead I'm gonna talk about my three favorite female characters.

1) Machi: she arrived late to the party but when I realised she had become my most favorite female character. She's just... so relatable. A big part of why I connect so strongly with her is bc I saw a lot of my 16 yeas old self in her. When I read chapter 94 I had to put down my phone and took a deep breath bc... Machi was me. It's insane how strongly I related to her.

2)Tohru: my mad respect for Tohru knows no bounds. All alone and trying to be so strong. I love Tohru for how good she is and her story of finally opening the lid and confront his trauma in order to be able to move forward is... excelent. I could spend days taking about Tohru Honda and how wonderful and human and flawed she is. One of the best constructed female protagonists I've even seen.

3) Akito. I love Akito. She captured my interest for the very start and oh how she kept it. I adore Akito bc she does terrible things that can never be undone and at the same time, is the one to finally put the horror to end. Akito stops the circle of violence of the curse and does her damn best to become a better person, even removing herself from the lives of the ex zodicas bc she is very aware of how she wronged them and doesnt want to make them uncomfortable. I adore her struggles with her identity and her internalized mysoginy and everything about her. Also... Akito hot 💅.

Snk:

Eren is the light of my life what more can I say?

Mikasa is wonderful and a fascinating balance between vulnerabilty and strenght. I loved Mikasa as soon as I saw her and she remains one of my most favorite characters of snk.

Jean. Oh man JEAN. The character with the most satisfying character development of the whole story. I already loved him to bits after Trost but then he went and said the very same thing I was screaming about since day 1: it is really ok if in order to defeat these monsters we become worse than them? A KING. I adore Jean and his courage and growth and how he always retains a cool head over his shoulders and hnnng. Jean Kirstein.

#ask replies #fruits basket #fruits basket spoilers #snk

[a-very-fond-farewell]

The forbidden crack! Untamed prompts: 10/?

Single Dad AU (not the one you expect): “Water my Bones”

[Pushing Daisies meets florist!au]

*

First it was the beekeeper suit. Then the astronaut one. THEN the Darth Vader costume. Every time a different attire. Lan Zhan is starting to think he better be changing grocery shop soon if he wants to fill his cart in peace without stumbling upon that weirdo during his weekly visit at the store.

Things he knows about said man: 1) he is competitive af, 2) he seems around his age, thirty five at most, 3) he has a flower shop in town, 4) he has a son.

The last thing, he knows because the child is always perched on the man’s cart when they shop. The third thing, he knows because his brother Lan Huan is the owner of the building where said man works. The second, he noticed once in passing, as they both waited in line to pay at the express line. And the first, he got to realize since day fucking one, when they entered the shop together and noticed they were following a similar path and unconsciously started rushing their way through their respective lists as fast as possible to win over the other.

It’s been four weeks already and Lan Zhan regrets moving to that part of town big time. The day he discovers something new, however, is when the florist decides to wear a simple black mask over the lower half of his face instead a full on costume. So even the usual lady clients cannot flirt with him asking if it’s yet another laundry day. The lot of them surprised to see him dressed normally for once. If wearing a black mask, black latex gloves and a black turtleneck in August can even be considered normal to begin with. The fact that he also looks unbelievably hot dressed in such a manner goes without saying. Not that Lan Zhan’s looking, of course.

Yet, it’s one thing to dress to impress and another to be affectionate towards your own child without taking your mask and gloves off not even to kiss him on the cheek or to check if one of his baby teeth is really falling off or not. So, when one of the ladies jokes about it, nobody expects the child to plainly say what Lan Zhan ends up hearing that day.

“If Dad touches my skin I’m going to die.”

The fact that said dad also conveniently runs away and forgets to take most of their bagged groceries with him right afterwards is also telling. But for the life of his Lan Zhan doesn’t know what such a dramatic exit can possibly mean.

[under the cut for details]

initially I thought to let Mo XuanYu be the baby, but then I kept A-Yuan/SiZhui. Also he is not Wei Ying’s actual son, but more on that later. ALSO he’s a savage child with snark for ages and channels every ounce of his adoptive father’s mischievous spirit.

Just like in “Pushing Daisies”, Wei Ying can revive the dead for a minute or two just by touching them [from Wikipedia: “If something is revived for more than one minute, a similar "life value" in the vicinity drops dead as a form of balance. If he touches the revived person or thing a second time, they die permanently.”]

But in this AU, ever since he was young, Wei Ying has revived a bunch of people, in the beginning without worrying too much of the consequences, not knowing someone of the same value (someone close to the revived dead person) must die if not given back to the realm of death after those two minutes.

His family used to take care of the needs of mourning families by running a funeral home. As a child he would simply touch the dead and go his merry way, happy to make others happy. But the dead would always run away, fearing their families would never take them back or not believe them to have been actually revived. Unaware of this, with bodies disappearing left and right, Wei Ying’s parents are accused of smuggling organs and corpses and are taken to prison before being put in house arrest for the rest of their sentence.

(In the meantime Wei Ying has been looked after by a new family, but after coming of age he decided to wait until the end of his parents’ sentence and buy them a house where they could live together again. In fact, he lives with them and his son) -> a perfectly rational choice bc I wanted to give them a chance to look after each other, okay? Also because a family trying to keep a common secret is fun and fresh and the exact opposite of the movie “Keeping Mum”, which is highly recommend btw.

He never experimented with the double-touch until (at fifteen) accidentally reviving a corpse of a dog, getting scared of it, and consequently smacking its tail in a (hilarious) fit of frustration bc “oh damn it... not again/go back to sleep I cannot deal with you/dogs are scary” and so on. The poor guy plopped down as if nothing had happened afterwards.

After that he learned his lesson and knew he could never touch a revived person again. Also dogs, especially dogs. They bite >:(

The first time Wei Ying actually understood something was wrong was when he was 21 and revived his stepsister YanLi, but her mother died as a consequence. He has brought his stepbrother Jiang Cheng back to life, but his own father was taken in his place. Before that time he had never considered the damage he had caused, because the consequences never involved his close ones but mere strangers up until then. So he vowed to never use his powers again afterwards.

The only exception being A-Yuan/SiZhui: the child was found in a dumpster, abandoned at three months old. Wei Ying revived him and didn’t want to wonder who might have died in the baby’s place... nor did he care. So he asked his parents to help. They’ve been raising the child together for five years, but Wei Ying has never directly touched him, always wearing gloves and masks around him.

He has also never hugged his step-siblings either since reviving them from their car accident from fourteen years back, but neither YanLi or Jiang Cheng knows the reason why. The only thing they know is that at the time, right after seeing them waking up from their “coma” and attending their parents’ funeral, Wei Ying has distanced himself from them, never to return.

(Insert shenanigans with Wei Ying trying his best not to run into his siblings, before they actually discover the truth along the way and bundle him up in quilts and coats just to be able to hug the hell out of him)

Lan Zhan is a detective and thanks to Wei Ying’s powers they solve crimes together. THEY REVIVE THE DEAD FOR TWO MINUTES and ask them what they remember before dying (which is basically the whole point of “Inquiry”, right?) and then Wei Ying touches them back and they drop dead for good.

Wei Ying knows his limits now and doesn’t play with empathy (got it? got it??)

Jin Ling has BOTH of his parents (can you imagine??) and he’s best friend with Lan Zhan and Lan Huan’s younge cousin, JingYi. And they SNOOP like nobody’s business bc they know there’s something fishy about “Uncle Wei”. But also they love to play with the other baby even if they pretend to be tough. They’re also friends with Wen Ning, who will teache them archery for their after-school activities as soon as they start elementary school and they are thrilled.

Wen Ning was actually one of the few corpses Wei Ying has revived in childhood that made it back home and was believed by others. (Wen Ning was still a child himself when he died, so he went straight back home and nobody questioned it, too happy to care......... which is basically canon)

His sister Wen Qing is the only friend Wei Ying has that knows about his secret and she’s the one suggesting Lan Zhan to..........wait a minute or two before leaving the morgue where she works at.

“You might never know what the dead could be able to say after you switch off the lights. You get me?”

He doesn’t get it. Not at first.

But! He grows interested in Wei Ying and the fact that he cannot touch his own child. Is it an allergy? Is it an illness? Lan Zhan has questions and he needs to find out the truth by himself.

Wei Ying’s child needs to be properly held by a parent at least once in his life tho... and Lan Zhan is made by very fine, very expensive husband material.

(I wanted him to meet Wei Ying’s parents. Sue me.)

Also I thought Wei Ying would like to make things grow (hence the florist!au you never asked for) bc he might feel guilty about the things he has done + his trust issues about getting attached to someone and then seeing them die AND THEN HAVING TO ACTUALLY LET THEM GO FOR REAL.

I’m sad now.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #cql #wangxian #the untamed #the forbidden crack! untamed prompts #mdzs/au: single dad #mdzs/au: florist #mdzs/au: pushing daisies

[arielsojourner]

I love Luke goes back in time and saves everyone and leading a Jedi reform. I love Darth Vader going back and redoing his life. But what if they went back in time TOGETHER? I know it is implausible. Time travel always is but I just cannot get this plot bunny to leave me alone till I write out an outline at least.

So this is what I have so far: Luke and Vader in the Original Trilogy decide they are going to team up to kill the Emperor/free Vader and because of SOMETHING they end up being back in time together. After a few minutes of “WTF? Where are we?” Luke adapts faster than his father and decides, they will just have to do this now and save everything before it goes to hell. Yes he has “lost” his friends but he has his father and he can make a better life for everyone if Vader works with him. Imperial education *cough propaganda cough* being what it is on Tatooine (to the extent Luke even went through his Imperial home school courses), it is up to Vader to tell them where to go and what to do. They are on the Outer Rim during the Clone War sieges and they end up joining up with the 501st while Pong Krell is leading them.

I see: - Vader ending Krell with extreme prejudice and Luke allowing it.

- Luke focusing on the difference between Clone vs. Storm troopers and being disgusted with Krell and bonding with the 501st by just being the deadly ball of sunshine, sweet cinnamon roll he is. The clones pretty much adopt him and he adopts them.

-Vader wants to just vent his fury on everyone and kill Krell and then kill Palpatine. He could care less about the Order (he won't purge them, he won't be tricked into that again, but there is little love there, there is just enough for those precious few), he just wants Padme and Ahsoka  and Luke safe. (He doesn't know about Leia, neither does Luke; they went back in time before Luke went to Dagobah but after Jabba is dead and Han is rescued).

-Vader is so happy to have competent troops. Imperial troops are really hit and miss and so few clones remained after a few years in the ranks. He does miss the Executor and his Admiral though.

-Luke wants to get to know what the Order was like in its heyday but after seeing Krell and with Vader disclosing some of the campaigns of the Clone Wars and how the Order operates, Luke has decided that the Order is not for him, thank you very much. No attachment? Marriage and kids forbidden? To say nothing of only taking toddlers and the fact that the Republic is not the shining beacon that Leia always claims it was (Luke already had his doubts, he grew up in Hutt occupied space after all). He figures the Order is hardly likely to embrace him as a Jedi so he will be a Jedi on his own. He will help his father and defeat Palpatine.

-They will end this puppet war, free the clones, kill Palpatine, and ensure Anakin and Padme live happily ever after. Vader is satisfied in knowing that Padme is happy and alive (he cannot bear to even think of facing her, just knowing his Angel is alive and with Anakin Skywalker is fine by him). He has Luke who will not leave him now or ever. They will make a life together somehow.

-The clones while thankful are also a bit conflicted. Krell is dead, yay! There is a Force user, a red lightsaber, a Sith?! But he is hanging around someone who clearly is a Jedi (such a nice Jedi!) and they are working together. Is this our new Jedi general? But then, Krell was a Jedi and got them killed. Wait, did the Jedi just call the Sith father?!

-The Separatists are routed. Vader and Luke work seamlessly together. They are not the same as Obi-Wan and Anakin, how could they be? Luke's training is minimal (lightsaber forms, what are those? and by Order standards Luke in thought, deed, and existence is heretical to say the least) but his instincts and strength are astounding and as for Vader, just think "Vader Down" but times 100 because Vader is fighting with his son and Padme is still alive and there is still hope. Vader is no longer a slave to any man. He can make things right.

-Luke and Vader get to work on the clone control chips. Vader slices the program and Luke uses field surgery (learned in the hidden rooms on Tatooine doing emergency surgery on escaped slaves) along with Kix and others to deal with the physical reality of the chips.

-Perhaps  throw some EU Force use in there and have Luke just experimenting with the Force and figuring out how to use it to help the clones with their accelerated aging or like in the “Darksaber” novel, Luke asking Vader to work with him to literally pick up entire Separatist ships and throw them out of they star system. Vader is a bit stunned by Luke's innovation, but decides he is not going to tell Luke what the Force can or cannot do or be used for and just encourage his son to use it however he wants. With Luke having seen Vader in action and Yoda on Dagobah, he doesn't have any concept of what should be beyond him and working with the "Chosen One" makes them nearly unstoppable.

-Vader has Luke with him, having Luke Fall is irrelevant so long as he has his family with him. Plus Luke is what Vader always imagined a Jedi should be back when he was just a boy on Tatooine. Sometimes Vader thinks of the dreams he had of Jedi freeing everyone and wonders if it was Luke he was really foreseeing.

-Luke decides that with him being a Jedi and Vader nominally a Sith they will just have to command both sides of the war to stop fighting. Fake it till you make it, kind of thing. War is what Palpatine wants so they are just going to decide to stop. Sith love to play games where they win regardless of the outcome. The only way to fight a Sith is not to play the game. The clones can find new vocations (hunting slavers perhaps?) and the droids can be reprogrammed. Vader and Luke have 20 years of technological war time improvements they have lived through and they plan to bring that to bear on both sides of the puppet war.

-The Order starts getting bizarre reports from the front lines. Peace is breaking out, being enforced by Vader and Luke. Jedi teams show up to what they think are war zones and find peace. (details escape me, but just go with it!) Vader knows what will happen next and Luke is so unpredictable Palpatine is caught off guard. All his plans are falling apart.

-I want some Force sensitive clones. Perhaps if the chips are out and the aging fixed, one or two in each division or so has the potential to be Force sensitive. Luke is all for training them. Vader balks for a moment and then just decides to go with it. I see Fives as a Force user and Luke trains them enough to help free their brothers.

-Vader and Luke only use those names. They give no last names and no titles They frequently refer to themselves as father and son to the bewilderment of all.

-They run into some Jedi on a few of their missions. The Jedi are a bit confused by Luke and grow more and more suspicious but when Vader shows up behind him, a black sun of icy cold fire more than a few lightsabers are lit but Luke just stands between them and tells them that "Oh, him? Yes, he is a Sith, no you cannot kill him. Why? Because he will kill you and we don't need that, we are all on the same side here." Vader makes a sound that without his mask would definitely by a snort of derision "No, really father, we are nominally on the same side." "If we are on the same side son, tell the Jedi to put their blades down. I won't have them accidentally hurting you or I will tear them apart and paint the walls with their blood."  And Plo  or Aayala or Kit or whoever they are meeting is just  like "WTF? Are we, are we going to fight? Father, did you say father? Your father is a Sith lord and you are a Jedi? Jedi don't have fathers, well Jedi have fathers but they don't have fathers if you know what I mean." And Luke is all "Jedi have fathers. I have a father. Being a Sith or a Jedi doesn’t mean people don’t have fathers. Now we have more important things to talk about. The war is over because we say it is over so put down your weapons and let us just go about our business."

-And since Jedi don't attack unarmed people (not that Vader is ever unarmed; even without his lightsaber drawn he could kill them all), they just put down their weapons and Luke quietly, inexorably bulldozes them into following his lead, Vader looming over his shoulder, daring anyone to disagree with his smol but mighty son. "My son says we are now at peace and the clone troopers are free. Argue and I will choke you."

-They are not at peace yet, but Luke takes a page out Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru's book of proverbs that used to have him rolling his eyes as a kid and one of them was if you keep insisting something is true, it becomes true. Granted his aunt and uncle were talking about having fun while doing his chores, but Luke is nothing if not adaptable. War is over because Luke says it is and Vader agrees with him, so there.

-Ventress joins their little band. Luke figures Yoda was wrong about the "dark side dominating your destiny" with regards to his father so he can just be wrong about every other dark side user.  Luke insists Vader can teach Ventress or they can all three of them learn awesome Force things together, just Luke will avoid the dark side, no dark side for him, thank you. 

-Luke and Vader take down Savage before Satine can be killed. I think Luke and Satine would get along well and Vader of course would inform Luke about Obi-Wan’s connection with her and I see Luke wanting to match-make, Order rules of attachment be damned. He wants Obi-Wan to be happy. Vader gets a vicious thrill out of how this will torture his old master. Luke plans to rehabilitate Maul too (think Maul from Star Wars Rebels) into his growing band of Force misfits - Vader, clone force sensitives, Ventress, maybe even Dooku, it is all good.

-Anakin, Obi-Wan and Ashoka keep missing Luke and Vader but Palpatine sends Padme into the mix, desperate to figure out what is going on with his carefully constructed Sith master plan. Vader gets one inkling that Padme is on her way and goes into stealth mode (he does have stealth mode, no shut up, he does. Just because he is 7 feet tall and has distinctive breathing doesn’t mean he cannot do stealth). He is still hovering near Luke, he is not leaving Luke alone but he cannot bear to see her see her, to have her see him: her plans to never ever EVER tell her who he is, just watch her from afar. Sigh.

-Luke is all earnestness and light when meeting her. He doesn't know ahead of time that she’s "mom" -Vader still cannot bear to give details other than to say she was his whole world --but he is intuitive and very powerful in the Force so he puts two and two together and is at his dotting farm boy best with her and Padme seeing peace is really happening, throws her full support behind this strange Jedi. Vader stalks them both and not so secretly foils whatever nonsense Palpatine had cooked up for their meet and greet event with large explosions. "Master Jedi, that explosion, don't we need to investigate?" "No, Senator, everything is fine. My companion is keeping up with all the security while we talk. Now what can Naboo do to ensure the sentient rights of the clones are honored now that the war is over? Do you think you could arrange a meeting with me and the Chancellor?" 

It is all just piecemeal and I don't think it could ever be coherent enough to be a full story (too many plot holes and character crack) but it is such a wonderfully tasty idea with all the substance of cotton candy I just had to share.

#sw au #star wars alternate universe #luke skywalker sweet cinnamon roll #Luke and vader #father and son save the galaxy #luke and vader save the galaxy #clone wars #luke skywalker #darth vader #clones

[ohmytheon]

ALSO because Roy is a Jedi he would totally be struggling with giving into his anger and turing to the dark side and straying from his path of you smell what I'm stepping in. He would totally have like an Aragorn Return of the King moment with a lightsaber though because Roy-Boy is dramatic and does his shit with style. Would Riza and Roy also have been childhood friends??

UGH I HAD LIKE 5 PARAGRAPHS WRITTEN AND ACCIDENTALLY PRESSED BACK TOO MUCH. ok SO

YES. This makes perfect sense because it ties in with his struggles in FMA. Roy obviously struggles with this throughout his life, especially since he’s never had any proper Force training by an actual Jedi or Force Master and was mainly taught to subdue it in order to not get caught or sensed by the Sith. So he and Riza have a secret pact that, if Roy is to ever give into his anger and go to the Dark Side, or even come close, Riza is to kill him. She accepted it at once, but it obviously hurts her because she knows how good of a person Roy is. Everyone, the Rebellion and Empire alike, sees Roy as this really detached guy, but she knows that Roy is truly emotional and cares about people so much that it hurts sometimes. Being super Force sensitive has to be painful, I’d think. It seemed like that to me. Roy is terrified of the Dark Side - he remembers vague tales about it from his mom - but also, in times, has felt the boost in strength from embracing his emotions. It’s a slippery slope, ya know.

ALSO I am SO IN LOVE with the idea of Roy have an Aragorn ROTK moment with a lightsaber (I mean, I’ve only seen that movie like 40 times…) that it physically PAINS ME. Bless you for this image! I’m thinking, instead of in TESB, when Luke allows himself to fall to his “death” instead of joining Vader after he’s told the truth about his dad, when Ed is confronted by Darth Father (I’m calling him that from now on, sorry), he doesn’t give up. Sure, he’s in a boat load of pain from having his arm cut off and he’s in total shock from the lie, but Ed is the most stubborn person in the galaxy. He’s willing to fight even though he’s only got one arm and lost his lightsaber in the duel. Can’t stop won’t stop.

Except when all hope seems lost and Darth Father is ready to cut a weak and desperate Ed down, the lightsaber shoots back up and flies past them – RIGHT IN ROY’S OUTSTRETCHED HAND. And Ed is like, “Oh shiiiiiit,” and Darth Father is like, “WHOA THE FORCE IS WAY STRONG WITH THIS ONE,” and Roy is like, “NOT MY ADOPTED SPACE SON. I mean, he’s annoying as hell and a pain in the ass, but NO ONE CHOPS HIS ARM OFF AND GETS AWAY WITH IT.” And yeah, Roy is hella pissed and he probably most definitely should NOT be using the Force right now when he’s not thinking straight, but it’s this super emotionally charged lightsaber duel. Darth Father can sense the darkness and rage in Roy’s heart, but Roy is so blinded by his concern for Ed that he doesn’t even realize it. Riza and Hughes show up in their ship and blast at Darth Father, distracting him and knocking him down or something, which allows Roy to scoop up Ed and get into the ship so they can bounce to safety.

Meanwhile, Father goes back to report to Emperor Dante, who is all, “I sensed something stirring beyond Edward Elric. Perhaps, with the right push, we can shove Roy Mustang into the Dark Side instead.” (Ahahaha but that’s not ominous AT ALL. No one important dies in stuff like Star Wars and FMA, which causes them to become wrecked with emotions and self-destructive, right?)

As for Riza and Roy still being childhood friends, I want to say yes - because I love that dynamic about them A LOT - so maybe, in an attempt to give Roy SOME sort of Force training so he’ll be able to control himself and keep that shit on lock, Aunt Christmas sends him to train under a man known as Master Hawkeye, someone who has studied the Force intensely as a science rather than as a religion. (So…like the opposite of the Guardians of the Whills aka Scar in this scenario.) She learned about him via her contacts with a General Grumman in the Rebellion, who of course has his own agenda for giving her the information. While studying under Master Hawkeye, Roy ends up befriending the man’s daughter, Riza, who turns out to not be Force sensitive at all, unlike her father and Roy. She’s embarrassed by this at first, because she thinks that her father looks down on her for it, but then she’s really good with a blaster and can pretty much kick anyone’s butt. It’s only natural when the two of them join the Rebellion, though Roy did so first. Her father outright refused, staying strictly in the middle, but was killed when Imperial stormtroopers invaded their city.

#star wars au #fma #roy mustang #edward elric #riza hawkeye #fmab