#cyrano jones | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

t0ast-ghost · 13 days

Text

I’m having a bit of trouble with this episode, I mean it’s S2 episode 15 (Trouble With Tribbles). I promise I can come up with a better opening (edit: I didn’t)

It’s the episode in ds9! But without Jadzia Dax :(

- How can Chekov just sit like that

- Spock is not impressed with Chekov’s joke :((

- HEHEHE

- Kirk is not amused with the space station

- “And that gives him the authority.” Spock leans over and whispers in Kirk’s ear

- “What, what what.” Kirk is what-ing all over the place

- CANADA MENTION LOL (finding out William Shatner is Canadian was a fucking jump scare)

- Kirk is like “if you say Quadrotriticale one more time-”

- the audacity of this bitch <3

- “Does everybody know about this wheat but me?” Kirk is so damn lost

- “Is it alive? Can I hold it?” Uhura that looks like one of those keychain Pom poms. I wanna hold one too.

- “Is that an offer or a joke.” “It’s my offer.” “It’s a joke.” I kinda like whatever these two got going on

- Kirk’s greatest enemy… quadrotriticale

- “Ah, My dear Captain Kirk.” “My dear captain Koloth.” What is Kirk on today?

- Why do they pronounce Klingons like that cling- gones

- Is Koloth played by the same guy as Trelane

- Kirk and Koloth wanna hate fuck so bad

- I love engineering just being crazy into their field, they’re all huge nerds about it and I love them

- Spock petting the tribble in the background

- Spock take a tribble, you need to relax

- “Captain, may I ask where you’ll be?” “Sickbay, with a headache.” Get this man a drink or smt

- I love McCoy getting his own little side quest of figuring out how tf tribbles work

- Don’t you fucking date insult Scotty’s ship! THATS TOO FAR

- I love this conversation between Kirk and Scotty. Kirk just baffled that Scotty threw the first punch. “Is this off the record?” “No, this is not off the record.” I’m giggling throughout this conversation

- Scotty’s so happy about catching up on his technical journals

- McCoy and Spock’s fight in the science room. They only call each other sir when they’re fighting

- Kirk got whoopee cushioned by a tribble

- Imagine your chief medical officer is that pretty and you’re normal about it (he’s not normal about it but just imagine)

- MCCOY SAYS “BISEXUAL”

- Kirk, Spock, and Uhura are so miserable while McCoy has just a single tribble as a fidget toy

- “In my opinion you have taken this entire very important project far too lightly.” “On the contrary, sir— I think this project is very important. It is you I take lightly.” KIRK ON THAT BITCH SHIT

- Kirk: Cyrano Jones— a Klingon agent? *laughs*

Baris: You heard me.

Kirk: I heard you.

Spock: He simply could not believe his ears.

- “You can’t deny he’s distrusted this station!” You cannot deny these nuts!

- Kirk says “Au Revoir”

- Kirk has accepted his tribble fate. Him rising out of the pile. Someone got to just throw tribbles at Kirk

- McCoy comes in with a miraculous solution and then leaves to find another.

- “Mr.Baris, they like you. Well there’s no accounting for taste.”

- McCoy’s explaining the grain was poisoned. McCoy sounds more southern when happy.

- It’s not a passing around of admiration, they’re passing around blame lol. They did something bad

- whispering “you gave them to the klingons?” Oh my goddd

- I love everyone laughing and Spock just making this face

Genuinely loved this episode and was laughing throughout it. I am susceptible to tribbles.

Masterpost

Episode written by David Gerrold

#star trek #star trek tos #star trek the original series #spock #s'chn t'gai spock #leonard bones mccoy #captain james kirk #montgomery scott #nyota uhura #tos spock #tos bones #tos mccoy #tos kirk #tos scotty #tos uhura #trouble with tribbles

26 notes · View notes

crystal-mouse · 2 years

Text

The pom pom trend a few years ago was actually a tribble infestation engineered by Cyrano Jones

#star trek tos #the trouble with tribbles #tos #mouse rambles #star trek meme folder #tribbles

222 notes · View notes

1shirt2shirtredshirtdeadshirt · 1 year

Text

Spock witnessing Jim Kirk being a sassy diva throughout the entirety of The Trouble With Tribbles: A Series

Part 3

"KIRK: My chicken sandwich and coffee. This is my chicken sandwich, and coffee.

SPOCK: Fascinating.

KIRK: I want these off the ship! I don't care if it takes every man we've got, I want them off the ship!" - Sassy Diva Jim Kirk

Kirk: *Long suffering sigh* “. . . Energize.” -- Yet again, Sassy Diva Jim Kirk

"As Captain, I want two things done. First, find Cyrano Jones, and second . . . (sighs as another tribble hits him on the head) . . . close that door." - Also Sassy Diva Jim Kirk

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4

Bonus

Screencaps by TrekCore

122 notes · View notes

trek-tracks · 2 years

Text

Hook the fondly teasing banter directly into my veins

#star trek #star trek tos #leonard mccoy #jim kirk #spock #bones mccoy #captain kirk #the trouble with tribbles #cyrano jones #tribbles #McSpirk #triumvirate

392 notes · View notes

defconprime · 2 years

Text

Rittenhouse Complete Animated Adventures cards 37-45, More Tribbles, More Troubles, 2003.

#star trek tos #star trek cards #james t. kirk #star trek tas #koloth #cyrano jones #tribbles #leonard mccoy

15 notes · View notes

destinationtoast · 1 year

Text

Not exactly Cyrano (4574 words) Chapters: 1/4 Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Roy Kent/Jamie Tartt, Keeley Jones/Roy Kent/Jamie Tartt Additional Tags: Humor, Pining, Letters, Impersonation, Jamie ships Roy and Keeley, but is also very into shagging Roy, while they're both pining after Keeley, what on earth could the solution be?, thinking.gif, Polyamory (eventually), canon divergent after Sunflowers

Summary: “Why won’t you just talk to Keeley and try to fix things?” Jamie asks after sucking Roy’s cock.

Jamie hatches a mad letter-writing scheme to get Roy and Keeley back together. Which is a bit of a shame, because he's really enjoying shagging Roy.

#ted lasso #royjamie #royjamiekeeley #reelie #roy x jamie #roy x jamie x keeley #toasty fic #op

42 notes · View notes

anonymousewrites · 1 year

Text

Logos and Pathos (Book 2) Chapter Eleven

Spock x Empath! Reader

Chapter Eleven: Trouble with Klingons

Summary: (Y/N) has to watch out for Klingons, but they seem intent on messing with the Enterprise crew. That's fine. (Y/N) will handle them.

As (Y/N) waited to be sent back down to Deep Space Station K-7, they were far from bored. Uhura had been gifted a tribble by a travelling merchant, and it had no multiplied into more than twenty. So far, no one was complaining, though, since their little trills were calming. Their effect on others’ emotions were pleasing as well, so (Y/N) was enjoying themself not dealing with negative emotions as they pet a tribble.

“Spock, they’re so cute,” cooed (Y/N) as the pleasant emotions of calm humans washed over them.

Spock looked at them. He found (Y/N) cute as they played with the little animals, but he wasn’t going to admit that. “They do seem to have a calming effect on the crew.” He was pleased to see (Y/N) to relaxed.

“Here! Pet one. It’s nice.” (Y/N) held out a white tribble.

Spock knew he should make a logical reason to not pet the tribble since there was no reason for him to other than it would be pleasant (close to an emotion), but he couldn’t’ say no to (Y/N)’s eager expression. “Very well.” He held the tribble and softly petted it. Spock was not immune to its charm.

“How long have you had this thing, Lieutenant?” asked Bones, looking at Uhura.

“Since yesterday, Doctor,” she replied. “This morning I found out that he—I mean, she—had babies.”

“Well, I’d say, in that case, you got a bargain,” joked Bones.

“You running a nursery, Lieutenant?” asked Kirk.

“Oh, Captain. Well, I hadn’t intended to, sir, but the tribble had other plans,” said Uhura.

“Did you get this at the space station?” Honestly, Kirk was just surprised that one tribble had become twenty overnight.

“Yes, sir,” said Uhura.

“A most curious creature, Captain,” remarked Spock. “Its trilling seems to have a tranquilizing effect on the human nervous system.”

“Celian, too,” added (Y/N), sighing happily as they played with the tribbles.

“Fortunately, of course, I am…immune to its effects,” said Kirk as he stroked the tribbles fur.

“Oh, yes. Of course,” teased (YN).

Spock did not reply for the sake of his pride.

Kirk smirked and chuckled at the interaction, exchanging significant glances with Bones. “Well, Lieutenant (L/N), I hate to remove you, but I need you to return to K-7. Baris is getting nervous about all the Klingons, and even if they don’t try anything with the wheat, I think negotiation might be needed.”

(Y/N) smiled. “No problem, Captain, I’ll head right down.”

“Be careful,” said Spock. “The Klingons are volatile.”

“Don’t worry, Spock. I can handle what they throw at me.”

After they ordered, (Y/N), Scotty, and Chekov sat down at a table while the other nine officers (twelve in all to match the Klingons’ numbers) occupied another.

“Excuse me, but may I interest you in a tribble?” said Cyrano Jones, the merchant whole gave Uhura a tribble.

“No, thank you,” said (Y/N).

Jones shrugged and left, walking over to the Klingon table. “Ah, friend Klingon! Might I interest you in a tribble?” He held out a tribble, and it trilled angrily as it neared the Klingon.

The Klingon, Kolax (Koloth’s right hand), glared at it distastefully and backed away. “Get it away from me.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t understand it,” said Jones in confusion as the tribble screeched. “I’ve never seen them act this way.”

(Y/N) cocked their head. Interesting. Tribbles don’t like Klingons.

“Get it out of here,” repeated Kolax.

“They never act like this,” said Jones.

“Take it away!” barked Kolax.

“Yes, of course,” said Jones as the tribble cried out. He walked over to the bar.

The waitress arrived at their table and handed out drinks.

“When are you going to get off that milk diet, lad?” teased Scotty.

“This is vodka,” said Chekov, huffing.

“Where I come from, that’s soda pop,” said Scotty. “Now this is a drink for a man.”

(Y/N) chuckled. “Scotch? I have to admit, I think Celian drinks are the best.” They lifted their cocktail, ‘Passion.’ It was pink with a fruity scent. “Delicious with just the right kick.”

Scotty considered. “I once had a scotch variant in a drink called Déjà Vu from Celia. That was excellent.” He grinned. “I was drunk as a skunk afterward, but it was good.”

The trio laughed together as they relaxed for the first time in forever. Their peace was interrupted as Kolax spoke loudly from the bar.

“The Earthers like those fuzzy things, don’t they?” remarked Kolax, looking at the tribbles. “Well, frankly, I never liked Earthers. They remind me of Regulan bloodworms.” The Klingons laughed, and Chekov scowled. Aggression dripped from Kolax like oil.

“That does it!” cried Chekov.

“Easy,” said (Y/N).

“Well, there is one Earth man who doesn’t remind me of a Regulan bloodworm. That’s Kirk,” spat Kolax. “A Regulan bloodworm is soft and shapeless. But Kirk isn’t soft.” The Klingons snickered. “Kirk may be a swaggering, overbearing, tin-plated dictator with delusions of godhood…but he’s not soft.”

Chekov tried to stand, but Scotty held him back. “Easy, lad.”

“Don’t let them get to you,” said (Y/N), ignoring Kolax’s poisonous emotions. “They’re trying to get a reaction. Don’t give them the satisfaction.”

Kolax turned his attention to (Y/N). “Celians are tolerable, but they’re so…sensitive. I’ve heard some are good for their looks, and I guess that’s true.” He smirked. “I guess the Federation keeps some of the softies around for eye-candy.”

“Mx. (L/N)!’ said Chekov. “You can’t just let them talk about you that way.”

(Y/N) smiled calmly. “I can take some insults, Chekov.”

“That’s right! Such a good sport,” sneered Kolax. “And that means I can say that the only reason you’d lower yourself to deal with Federation weaklings must because you like that attention.”

(Y/N)’s gaze darkened, and Scotty and Chekov looked at them watchfully.

“I mean, why else would they be kept if they weren’t sleeping around?” sneered Kolax, the disdain clear in his voice.

Chekov’s hand curled into a fist, and he stood, but (Y/N) was faster and approached Kolax. They could ignore the ugly crawl of his emotions on their skin, but they wouldn’t just sit there.

Kolax smirked. “You know, we’ve been in space a long time. If you want a little fun that’s better than these Earthers and Vulcans, just let me know.”

(Y/N) laughed, taking Kolax, Scotty, and Chekov aback. They sighed and smirked condescendingly at Kolax. “Me? Lower myself to sleep with the likes of you?” They scoffed. “As if. You don’t even deserve the time I waste talking to you.”

“Alien whore,” hissed Kolax, his anger reaching red-hot intensity.

“Yep, that’s me, and you wish you could get some,” said (Y/N), rolling their eyes.

Kolax made a move to hit them, and Chekov and Scotty were on their feet in a second to defend their friend. Scotty swung and hit Kolax in the face. The other Klingons were on their feet in an instant, and Chekov tackled one. Brawls between Enterprise officers and Klingon agents broke out around the bar.

(Y/N) sighed as chaos reigned. Oh, boy. This is a mess.

Aboard the Enterprise, Kirk paced before the twelve officers who had been in the bar when the fights with the Klingons broke out. Spock stood with his arms crossed in the corner.

“I am forced to cancel shore leave for both ships,” said Kirk in frustration. “I want to know who started it.” No one spoke. “I’m waiting.” He sighed. “Freeman. Who started the fight?”

“I don’t know, sir,” said Freeman.

“Alright. Chekov…” Kirk raised an eyebrow at the ensign. “I know you. You started it, didn’t you?”

“No, sir, I didn’t,” said Chekov.

“Well, who did?”

“I don’t know, sir.”

“ ‘I don’t know, sir.’ I want to know who threw the first punch!” Still, no one answered. “Alright, you’re all confined to your quarters.”

“Captain, witnesses assure that (Y/N) was not involved in the fight,” said Spock. “And their specialties will be needed.”

Kirk nodded. “Right, right, the rest of you, dismissed.” He stopped Scotty as well as he went to leave. “Scotty, (L/N), you two were supposed to prevent trouble.”

“Yes, Captain. My apologies,” said (Y/N).

��Who threw the first punch?” asked Kirk.

“Um…” Scotty coughed uncomfortably. “I did, Captain.”

Spock raised his eyebrow in surprise. Normally, Scotty was excitable but sensible.

Kirk blinked. “You did, Mr. Scott?” He looked at (Y/N). “What started it?”

(Y/N) winced. “Well…the Klingons were trying to provoke us, Captain.”

“They insulted us!” said Scotty indignantly.

“Must have been some insult,” said Kirk.

“Aye, it was,” said Scotty, his face wrinkling in disgust.

“You threw the first punch,” realized Kirk.

“He was doing a really good job controlling himself, but the Klingons just kept pushing,” said (Y/N). “They got pretty mean.”

“Pretty mean?! They called Kirk a swaggering, overbearing, tin-plated dictator with delusions of godhood!” cried Scotty.

“And that’s what caused the fight?” asked Spock, raising an eyebrow.

“No, no, I know the Captain can take a few insults,” said Scotty.

“Ah,” said Kirk, admittedly a little disappointed at Scotty’s blasé attitude towards those insults. “So what did the Klingons say that did started?”

(Y/N) coughed awkwardly. “Well, uh, Kolax called me a whore.”

“And then he went to attack them!” said Scotty indignantly. “I mean, maybe they could hold themself back, but I couldn’t let that slide.”

(Y/N) smiled. Scotty was a good friend.

Spock’s eyes narrowed imperceptibly. He greatly disliked that the Klingons had insulted (Y/N) like that. He knew that they were attractive and that drew attention to them quite a bit. Unfortunately, Spock himself had seen people make unwanted advances on (Y/N), and he hated it. He hated seeing them uncomfortable. In fact, while Spock preferred peace to violence, he admitted to himself that he would struggle to keep his composure if he was in Kolax’s presence when he insulted (Y/N). They didn’t deserve it in any way.

“(Y/N), I hope you were not injured by Kolax’s attack,” said Spock.

(Y/N) shook their head. “No. I avoided the fighting.”

Kirk sighed. “We’re glad you’re alright. Scotty, while you had good intentions, I do have to confine you to your quarters.”

Scotty smiled. “Thank you, sir. That’ll give me a chance to catch up on my technical journals.” He left the room happily.

“Captain, as (Y/N) was uninvolved in the physical altercation and may be needed for negotiations with the Klingons, might I suggest that you—” began Spock.

Kirk waved a hand. “They’re not getting punished. They handled themself well.” He nodded to (Y/N). “Good job, Lieutenant.”

“Thank you, Captain,” said (Y/N).

“I’ll try to smooth things over. God knows what Baris’ll say about this,” sighed Kirk, leaving the room.

(Y/N) sighed. “I know he says I did a good job, but I didn’t really do my job, did I?” they joked, glancing at Spock. “I should have realized that snapping back at Kolax would only worsen the situation.”

Spock took a step closer to them. “Kolax was disrespectful. You handled it with your words. I find that approach logical.”

(Y/N) raised an eyebrow. “Even though I insulted him back?”

“Admittedly, that was not the most diplomatic approach.” Spock looked at (Y/N). “But I still approve.” (Y/N) blinked in surprise. “I…It displeases me to see people take advantage of your kindness. I think you rightfully defended yourself.”

(Y/N) smiled. “Thank you, Spock.” Their face fell. “I just wish people didn’t assume that because I’m attractive and friendly it means I down for everything. I’m not. I’m more than a pretty face.”

“Your value has never been in your appearance alone,” said Spock, reaching out and resting his hand on their upper arm. “I value you for your mind.” And your heart. But he wasn’t going to say that.”

(Y/N)’s smile returned with a dusting on pink on their cheeks. “I’ve always been able to feel safe with you, Spock. Thank you for that.” They looked at Spock with love in their eyes, although he couldn’t identify it. “I’m glad you’re here.” Their hand moved to cover his hand on their arm, but they held themself back in order to not cross any boundaries.

“As am I,” said Spock. Realizing his hand still rested on their arm, he drew it back and cleared his throat. “And if you need help making sure people do not cross your boundaries, I am here to offer you my assistance.”

(Y/N) grinned. “You do have an imposing presence. People would listen to you. I’ll let you know if I need any help.”

Privately, Spock promised himself to intervene in any future issues. It was illogical to believe words constituted a threat, but he couldn’t stand by if (Y/N) was hurt. They—Well, they weren’t his partner, but he would protect them as if they were.

After all, Spock loved them.

(Y/N) felt their heart swell up as Spock assured them that he was there to help them. To know that he respected them and wanted them to be respected by others felt wonderful. (Y/N) could hardly contain their desire to reach out to him and hold him tight. Their emotions were bright as their gaze met his.

If only Spock knew how much (Y/N) loved him.

Taglist:

@a-ofzest

@grippleback-galaxy

@genderfluid-anime-goth

@groovy-lady

@im-making-an-effort

@unending-screaming

#logos and pathos #s'chn t'gai spock #ambassador spock #star trek spock #spock #mister spock #spock x reader #tos spock #x reader #x gn reader #gn reader #x nb reader #nb reader #star trek fanfic #star trek the original series #star trek tos #star trek #star trek x reader

28 notes · View notes

sshbpodcast · 6 months

Text

Character Spotlight: Nyota Uhura

By Ames

All channels open! We hope you’ve been enjoying our character-by-character spotlight series here on A Star to Steer Her By, because we’ve got a ways to go! This week, we’re shining the spotlight on the OG Enterprise’s communications officer, Lieutenant Uhura, whose mere presence on the bridge did more than people give credit for. I talked about this a bit when I covered Nichelle Nichols’s autobiography, but everything she did as a prominent Black woman character on this show was progressive, boldly representative, and kickass.

While we wish her character got more to do (that’s the understatement of the year), she also got some absolutely triumphant moments, and also a handful of moments that could have been handled better. So join us as we celebrate Nyota Uhura as you scroll on below or listen to the banter on this week’s podcast episode (coverage starts at 1:19:26). We hope you brought your dancin’ fronds.

Best Moments

Sorry, neither I’d say you can’t get much more badass than this, but I also know what else is on this list. When Sulu is swashbuckling around and wants to rescue the “fair maiden” in “The Naked Time,” Uhura’s response of “sorry, neither” drops so many mics it blows out the speaker. And Nichelle adding the line herself, especially this early in the series, is nothing short of awesome.

Now that’s what I call music, stardate 2126.1 This is just a fluffy moment from “The Squire of Gothos,” but when Uhura starts playing the harpsichord per Trelane’s request and she seemingly magically knows how, it’s super adorable. Watching the pleased look on her face as she rocks out on an unfamiliar instrument is a fun moment from a fun episode, even if Trelane did address her pretty tactlessly first.

I can think no one better equipped to handle it Throughout The Original Series, we see background characters sliding into other roles when needed, and we’ve seen Uhura or Rand at the front stations before for sure. But when Scotty’s away in “Who Mourns for Adonais?” and Uhura hops into a technician’s uniform to rig up a subspace bypass circuit AND get commended by Spock, it’s clear she knows her stuff!

The game has rules Uhura really gets to shine in “Mirror Mirror,” so much so it’s on this list twice. Even though she’s dropped into the deep end, Uhura adapts to the situation, blends in with the mirror crew enough to enact a plan, and uses mirror Sulu’s obvious lechery as a weapon against him in an act so convincing she has him eating out of the palm of her hand!

There’s not enough room on this pad for the both of us Later in “Mirror Mirror,” Uhura straight up overpowers Marlena Moreau, yoinking a phaser out of her hands and cooling off a tense situation in which the captain’s woman was demanding that she go with them back to the good (or at least better) universe. Sorry, toots, there’s only room for one femme fatale on this ship, and she just handed you your own ass.

Only the sweetest creature known to man Could you blame Uhura for naively succumbing to the cuteness of tribbles and bringing one aboard? I mean, you could, but you’d be wrong because Uhura’s inclination in “The Trouble with Tribbles” to accept the tribble as a gift from Cyrano Jones and to share her offspring with the crew comes from a place of generosity and kindness, and I’ll not hear otherwise.

It is not allowed to refuse selection Sorry for the whiplash because we’re going from a fun episode about tribbles, to watching a Black woman having to fight off a rapist in “The Gamesters of Triskelion” (this is what happens when I order lists chronologically). It’s an uncomfortable scene and you have to listen to Uhura brutally screaming offscreen and watch her battle off a giant brute in shadow, but holy shit, she beats him back.

The future feminists want Somehow, it takes until The Animated Series to finally see women in control of the Enterprise. We give so much kudos to Uhura and Nurse Chapel in “The Lorelei Signal” for showing that each and every one of them is capable of commanding the ship, rescuing the men, and saving the day, all while having to wear those really unfortunate skirts that don’t even cover their asses.

Fool! Human females are intelligent “The Slaver Weapon” is a fascinating episode because it doesn’t feature Kirk at all, giving other characters a chance to shine. We already covered that Sulu becomes the champion of the episode by virtue of being neither a female or a vegetarian (both shunned in Kzinti culture), but Uhura does get some moments herself, like when she escapes their police web, if only briefly.

Get in the closet What might be Uhura’s best highlight comes in The Search for Spock, because movies have more time for secondary characters to do stuff. So when Uhura locks Mr. Adventure in the closet, it is a triumph for her character. Not only does it help her and the crew save the day, but this guy was being a prick to her about her job assignment, and she shuts him the hell up. Hell yes.

Shakespeare is better in the original cetacean Spock may have figured out that the probe in The Voyage Home was trying to communicate with Earth’s whales, but Uhura is the one to clean up the probe’s signal to hear what it would sound like somewhere in the ocean underwater. How does one even know how to do that? Do they train all communication officers how to translate messages in and out of whale song?

I’ve always wanted to play to a captive audience Speaking of singing, there’s more singing to talk about (though some of that will come in the next section). Last on the highlight reel is Uhura singing “The Moon’s a Window to Heaven” and using her fan dance in The Final Frontier to distract a bunch of natives while the others steal their horses. Is it also a little cringey and sexist? Probably, but look at her go! As you’ll see, it’s also one of few instances in TOS that her singing didn’t end in calamity…

—

Worst Moments

Oh, on the Starship Enterprise, there’s someone who’s in Satan’s guise In contrast to recent episodes of Strange New Worlds, bad things always happen to Uhura whenever she sings in The Original Series. Her mocking songs about Spock and Charlie in “Charlie X” make Charlie jealous and perhaps a bit offended (rightly so; it’s hella rude of her!), so he takes her voice from her. And to add insult to injury, no one in the mess hall even notices!

Does she not have object permanence? This small moment always bugged me. In “Arena,” after the Metron have boinged Kirk down to the planet to fight the Gorn, Uhura lets out a piercing scream. It’s always struck me as out of place and out of character for someone who’s usually so level headed and cool as a cucumber to go ballistic over an action the Metron literally just told you they were about to do. Overreact much?

I'm sorry, Captain, I can't do that Okay, she may have been under the influence of mind-altering spores, but it still hurts a little to see Uhura sabotage the communications system in “This Side of Paradise.” And since we haven’t given other characters a pass when they were possessed by things or mirror universe equivalents of themselves or are just pod people, we’re going to do the same here.

No singing on the bridge Yet again, Uhura is singing and something bad happens! It’s like she didn’t learn from the “Charlie X” incident. The instance in “The Changeling” is particularly horrifying though because Nomad finds her singing illogical and wipes Uhura’s memories. All of them! And we’re left for the rest of the whole series to wonder if she was able to get them back and still be herself!!

Immortality and eternal beauty Every so often we get glimpses of Uhura’s vanity as well, which is probably just a little bit of latent misogyny on the parts of the writers. We certainly see Uhura almost get tempted by Harry Mudd in “I, Mudd” when he offers to put her in one of the robo-bodies of his androids and keep her young and beautiful. Lucky for us, she uses this offer to her advantage to turn the tables on the robots instead.

It’s not the sun up in the sky It was bad enough for us that “Bread and Circuses” focuses on another parallel-development planet. But Uhura revealing that the denizens aren’t sun worshippers but followers of the Son of God just makes us groan out loud. Not only did this planet somehow develop one of the same religions as Earth (the one that matters to the producers, for those keeping track), but it’s revealed in a terrible pun. Groan.

I see my death! Here’s another strange moment in which Uhura comes across as vain. Like Sulu’s hallucinating knives in space, Uhura suddenly sees herself as an old woman in her reflection in “And the Children Shall Lead.” Gorgan finds the one thing in her mind that would freak her out, and that’s getting old and wrinkly and infirm. Maybe she should have taken one of those android bodies after all.

I would hear your voice and my fears would fade As much as it’s extolled for featuring one of the first interracial kisses on television, the Uhura-Kirk scene in “Plato’s Stepchildren” is not okay. For one thing, it is nonconsensual as hell and played to be unwanted from both parties, but Uhura’s finding comfort in memories of the captain’s leadership gives the impression that she has found a way to get through it by rationalizing that it’s okay. It is seriously not. And it makes what could be a progressive moment in history into something gross.

We’ve learned not to fear words The writers of TOS had some outdated ideas about the utopian future. When Lincoln calls Uhura “a charming negress” in “The Savage Curtain,” for instance, and then apologizes because of how belittling a term that was in his time (and for viewers of the show), Uhura shrugs it off as if, because so much time has passed, the intention in old Abe’s words are just erased. It’s complicated and there are much better ways this scene could have gone than clean-slating centuries of history and context, is what I’m saying.

I refer to the sky machine which enslaves you Oh boy, here’s another complicated moment for Uhura that could have been handled better. The Shore Leave computer in “Once Upon a Planet” has kidnapped Uhura, spends a while explaining slavery to her (of all people!), and then only listens to reason when Kirk and Spock show up to save her. Come on! Uhura was in prime position to save herself, but the two white men have to bring us home?

Feelings we’ve always been afraid to express Sorry, shippers, but whatever the hell is happening between Uhura and Scotty in The Final Frontier just comes across as weird and forced to me. When Uhura is under Sybok’s influence and starts coming on to Scotty, I just find it uncomfortable, and I give Scotty credit for his line “I don't think I could take it in my present condition. ...Or yours.” Otherwise it’d just get gross.

Dujvetlh 'oH nuq? rIn. Finally, and absolutely the worst of all, Uhura is made to look absolutely incompetent at her job in The Undiscovered Country. How, after all these years, does your communications officer seem to not know a damn word of Klingon? In what was meant to be a comic scene of the crew flipping through dictionaries in a panic, Uhura simply makes a fool of herself. In this final movie, it brings a character we loved down a couple pegs and that’s a crying shame.

—

Signal lost, folks. That’s it for this week, but we’ve still got some The Original Series characters to give their moments in the sun, so keep your eyes here. You can also battle with us through season one of Enterprise in our watchthrough over on SoundCloud or wherever you podcast, hail us on Facebook and Twitter, and maybe don’t sing in front of lifeforms we pick up in space.

7 notes · View notes

spoofymcgee · 2 years

Text

the trouble with tribbles is unequivocally the funniest thing on the internet.

look at this. do you see his little fucken expression? he's so tired. tribbles here, tribbles there, in his coffee and on his bridge and now he's stuck in a tribble shower?

'uhura. why is there a tribble in my seat. uhura did you depose me while i was getting insulted by a hoity-toity grain merchant and vote a tribble into power in my place. uhura you cannot make a tribble captain. captaining a starship is a very difficult job, unfit for a tribble. uhura, answer me.'

"as captain, i want two things done. first, find cyrano jones. second... close that door!"

also?? cyrano's little dance around the klingon fight is the funniest fucking thing. peak comedy. hilarious.

also also, we need to talk about spock and kirk's dynamic in this episode. they're basically–they'ra basically married, is the thing. spock is always putting a hand on kirk's arm or looking at him meaningfully to be like 'you cannot punch him. jim, you are aware that physical violence will get you arrested. restrain yourself to insults, please. and make them subtle, if you are capable of such.' and then kirk does! he roasts the living daylights out of the wheat dude and his assistant throughout the whole episode, but doesn't punch him even though he's a) pulled a whole fucken starship off course to. protect. some grain? yeah. because. that makes sense. b) hired a whole fucking klingon spy as his assistant. and c) he keeps insulting spock! (everyone in this episode is a little mean to spock and it's kinda funny.

and spock and McCoy's snippy little argument is to die for. the one in medbay? where spock says he prefers tribbles because at least they're quiet? god.

and how kirk is so quietly offended because scotty started a fight for the enterprise in three seconds, but let captain koroth wax poetic about how kirk is a lily livered yellow bellied fatheaded jerkface for a solid five minutes and didn't think anything of it?

oh, and captain koroth and kirk were absolutely eyefucking each other in that first scene.

"KOLOTH: Captain Kirk, there's been no formal declaration of hostilities between our two respective governments. So, naturally, our relationship will be a peaceful one.

KIRK: Let us both take steps to keep it that way.

KOLOTH: Of course." (via chakoteya.net)

steps? sounds kinda gay. what steps? making out? sleeping together? those steps?

and last of all, the way they bounce around what happened to the tribbles?

'well, captain, it was not i who operated the machinery to deal with them, so–'

'all credit should go tae mr chekov, captain, he came up with the plan.'

'did you guys murder all the fucken tribbles??'

'well, you see captain, it was mr scott who operated the machinery.'

scotty, deadpan 'i used the fuckin transporter, lad.'

'we gave them to the klingons, right before they went into warp.'

#the trouble with tribbles #tribbles #tos #captain kirk #spock #captain koroth #star trek #it's fucken hilarious is what it is #also tho what the fuck is with the klingons #why are they like this #like i gwt thst this is the pre retcon version but #they're just regular fucken dudes #not even ears #come on #give them like tails or something dont bw a coward

90 notes · View notes