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So, there's a dirty little secret in indie publishing a lot of people won't tell you, and if you aren't aware of it, self-publishing feels even scarier than it actually is.

There's a subset of self-published indie authors who write a ludicrous number of books a year, we're talking double digit releases of full novels, and these folks make a lot of money telling you how you can do the same thing. A lot of them feature in breathless puff pieces about how "competitive" self-publishing is as an industry now.

A lot of these authors aren't being completely honest with you, though. They'll give you secrets for time management and plotting and outlining and marketing and what have you. But the way they're able to write, edit, and publish 10+ books a year, by and large, is that they're hiring ghostwriters.

They're using upwork or fiverr to find people to outline, draft, edit, and market their books. Most of them, presumably, do write some of their own stuff! But many "prolific" indie writers are absolutely using ghostwriters to speed up their process, get higher Amazon best-seller ratings, and, bluntly, make more money faster.

When you see some godawful puff piece floating around about how some indie writer is thinking about having to start using AI to "stay competitive in self-publishing", the part the journalist isn't telling you is that the 'indie writer' in question is planning to use AI instead of paying some guy on Upwork to do the drafting.

If you are writing your books the old fashioned way and are trying to build a readerbase who cares about your work, you don't need to use AI to 'stay competitive', because you're not competing with these people. You're playing an entirely different game.

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Shrek (2001)

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Dan Mora just does not miss!

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Realistically, a household the size of Wayne Manor needs more than just a butler, and while Bruce might imagine he can keep his proclivities secret from his own domestic staff, Alfred certainly harbours no such illusions. I've gotta wonder what the orientation lecture he's worked out looks like. Like, of course they're going to be extensively vetted before they ever set foot on the premises, but at some point during the onboarding process the subject of the Batcave has gotta come up – I just wanna know how Alfred broaches that.

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Out of curiosity and also guilt over my own coffee intake. I wanna ask:

Now I'm not talking about when you're studying and so you drink 3x the usual amount or something like that. This isn't me asking what your record is. I'm talking about the most basic, average day, how many coffees you drink?

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Out of curiosity and also guilt over my own coffee intake. I wanna ask:

Now I'm not talking about when you're studying and so you drink 3x the usual amount or something like that. This isn't me asking what your record is. I'm talking about the most basic, average day, how many coffees you drink?

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hey elodie, what is it that you enjoy about teeth?

top six things:

1. Issued twice in one human lifetime and used to signify health, wealth and social class

2. She was a young woman whose countenance owed more to the peculiar animation of her face than any bone structure or classical beauty; her coloring and features lacked distinction, though her figure was such as must please; but she was graced with a set of very fine teeth, and a wide mouth which could be used to show them all at once, so that Society thought that she must be pretty, as she had so ready and so generous a smile. 

(or so says your internal monologue as you brood pointlessly over your tongue in the bathroom mirror, running five minutes late in the morning)

3. In our pre-labor class, we were all asked what traits of ours we wanted to pass on to our unborn babies. Everyone else said things like “love of fishing,” “love of learning,” and I was just like “I wanna pass down my TEETH,” and then, because I felt like that was weird to just say in the middle of a groupshare without qualifying it further, I stated “They Have Never Given Me Any Trouble, Not Even A Cavity,” and everyone stared at them with respect,

4. “Don’t worry,” I tell Glassbab as they cry over their teething pain, sitting up while holding them against my chest all night, and dipping only lightly into passages of sleep, “It’s only the feeling of your skeleton becoming external, and you won’t remember it,”

5. the human mouth is an omnivore’s toolkit, with a clever microbiome and great evolutionary heritage, and is very interesting

6. better than the alternative

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I just had a moment where i thought to myself “if i met myself when i was younger i would be kind to her. Hug her and keep her safe at all costs and try and cheer her up.”

Then another thought hit me: “why don’t i do that for myself now? Why do i have such disdain for the person i am now, but nothing but love and patience for the person i was? What is the difference?”

And i feel like i should continue reminding myself that until i realize, truly, that there is no difference between the two. I should have just as much patience and acceptance for the me sitting here today as i do for that little girl.

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Every summer I forget how much I fucking love spiders I’ve drunk one every day this week

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I have so much work to do that I'm watching old collegehumor videos

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"Don't use Libby because it costs libraries too much, pirate instead" is such a weird, anti-patron, anti-author take that somehow manages to also be anti-library, in my professional librarian-ass opinion.

It's well documented that pirating books negatively affects authors directly* in a way that pirating movies or TV shows doesn't affect actors or writers, so I will likely always be anti-book piracy unless there's absolutely, positively no other option (i.e. the book simply doesn't exist outside of online archives at all, or in a particular language).

Also, yeah, Libby and Hoopla licenses are really expensive, but libraries buy them SO THAT PATRONS CAN USE THEM. If you're gonna be pissed at anybody about this shitty state of affairs, be pissed at publishing companies and continue to use Libby or Hoopla at your library so we can continue to justify having it to our funding bodies.

One of the best ways to support your library having services you like is to USE THOSE SERVICES. Yes, even if they are expensive.

*Yes, this is a blog post, but it's a blog post filled with links to news articles. If you can click one link, you can click another.

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no, you're thinking of blackjack. pepperjack is a kind of special jacket that high school and university student in america wear to represent their teams in extracurricular activities.

pepperjack is amazing. the best cheese. whoever invented pepperjack is a genius for making cheese spicy.

- Rose

Isn't Pepperjack the bogan from that magical horse cartoon

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"What are you doctor of, by the way?" "Practically everything, my dear."

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when programs fucking autocorrect <3 to ❤️ and :) to 😃,,,, do you have any idea what you’ve just done?? what you just fucking destroyed ?