Crowned and Dangerous by Rhys Bowen
Rating: ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Royal Spyness books in reading order:
Her Royal Spyness
A Royal Pain
Royal Flush
Royal Blood
Naughty In Nice
Masked Ball at Broxley Manor (Prequel - short story)
The Twelve Clues of Christmas
Heirs and Graces
Queen of Hearts
Malice at the Palace
Crowned and Dangerous
On Her Majesty's Frightfully Secret Service
Four Funerals and Maybe a Wedding
Love and Death Among the Cheetahs
The Last Mrs. Summers
God Rest Ye, Royal Gentlemen
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THE BIG OLD JANUARY 2023 PICREW UPDATE
so another kind soul reminded me about picrew updates, and i realized the last time i'd posted screenshots was... november 2021?! man time moves fast in a pandemic. the silver lining is that, when you wait that long between updates, there's a lot of new stuff to share!
as of today, the unique item count is 186. obviously, there's a lot more in the game than what i show in these posts! the amount of categories is more or less set at this point - now it's a question of adding variety to what's already there. i'm at peace with the thought that finishing it will take as long as it takes. it's a for-fun project, and it's still fun, so on we go.
[let's not wait another year next time, though!]
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shoutout to that one physical therapist who looked at scans of my spine and looked at me in my dnd t shirt and said there was just no way someone my age would have this level of wear and tear without an intense athletic career. like i was gonna say oh right there ARE all those high school football injuries i lied about not having in my medical history. there WAS my secret stint with the russian ballet. im actually sixty five, i just look really young for my age. what do you mean theres no way the images are right before your goddamn eyes.
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HAPPIEST OF BIRTHDAYS TO OUR DEAR MICHAEL!!!
Due to my schedule, my celebrating is going to be a little bit more lowkey - wearing a t-shirt/earrings and listening to some of his music. And of course, just generally keeping his spirit alive as always!!
I hope he can feel how much his fans love him from all over up there!
We love you, Michael! 🥹💜
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🪞,🔥, and🐍. You said the Academic was kind of bad at Glasswork, didn't you?
🔥 — Least favourite Master of the Bazaar?
The Academic and Stones do not get on well. The Academic will occasionally do espionage chores for it in The Khanate, but by now, that’s more of a duty to the group as a whole. The Academic has had a few peeks into the pasts and inner lives of its colleagues, and while Pages, Wines and Spices took it relatively well (Fires is in there too, but doesn’t know), Stones merely re-experienced its trauma.
Even if we disregard biological reasons for hoarding, each of the Masters has an emotional reason for their favorite subject. It’s pretty obvious that Stones’ aggressive hoarding is either in response to or was exacerbated by getting collected itself. It’s not a hoarder of rocks, but a hoarder “of value,” which means that if unchecked, there is no way that Stones wouldn’t simply expand its own hoard to encompass everything else. The other masters have concrete-if evil- goals and interests. But Stones seems like it's trying to get all the value and power not out of enjoyment, but so that it can pin things up where they can’t hurt it. And Stones may no longer be called the Khan of Shackles, but we know exactly what it was known for collecting in the Fourth City.
Also, Stones’ manner of speech: its penchant for antiquated personal pronouns (thee, thou, etc) isn’t just a writing quirk to make Stones sound different, but means that The Academic can tell exactly when Stones means to talk down to them. Wines might use the Royal “We,” but it desperately craves jocular companionship. Pages might make up words to sound smart, but it does honestly want others to use them too. Stones uses language as yet another barricade. That’s a personal pet peeve of The Academic’s.
The Academic is also not a fan of Eaten. They turned away from the name when they realized that they actually could win the Marvellous. To seekers, mourning Eaten is all-encompassing. The Academic doesn’t know the whole story, but whoever Candles was is gone now. Seeking is an inadequate way of balancing the scales. And for their money, if you want to find meaning in nothing, The Discordance is a magnificent and rich expanse of the beauty of meaningful nothing. Seeking is a study closing your eyes very tightly and ignoring beauty.
(Note: If you point out that Stones might have collected living humans, but Pages uh. Pages has some. Uh. You know. Bodies? You’d think that Happles would be the one to but we all know Happles just eats them. Anyway. If you point that out then The Academic will agree with you that Pages is an unforgivable monster but you’ll still see them a day later, humming merrily pushing a wheelbarrel full of proscribed material, even though their Connected: The Masters is maxed out)
🐍 — Snakes or cats?
Neither. Much better to keep playing both sides against one another. If they’re distracted at home, then they have less time to fuss about in Real business in London.
🪞 — Do they enjoy being in Parabola? Why or why not?
Parabola’s a necessary evil, and while there are interesting things to find, the Academic would tell you that directly interfering with the dreams of others is the greatest cheat of all: if we bypass a man’s conscious mind, we bypass rational discussion.
This is of course utter hogwash; The Academic’s real argument is “I don’t want these grapes anyway, they’re sour.” They barely made it through the parabola section of Heart’s Desire, and the whole place is quite a lot of nonsense to them. It’s like this tumblr post:
Also if word about Parabola got out, it could be a serious business competitor to the railroad. If there’s ever an exceptional story about someone trying to use parabolan mirror-jaunts as a fast mode of travel, expect the academic to shut that down immediately and with nasty, extreme prejudice.
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