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aeoris4lovers · 11 months

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when caleb is talking to the nein about his past before the dinner with trent, he tells them that in the time he spent under trent, astrid and wulf never wavered in their dedication or willingness. after rereading his origins comic, though, i think he’s wrong. i think there was a pretty significant period of time where eadwulf specifically was having doubts about what they were doing right in front of his eyes.

exhibit a: the bodies

this is the most subtle example of it, but it’s also the earliest and probably represents the very beginnings of whatever doubts were brewing in wulf’s mind.

in both of these instances, there’s a dead or unconscious body on the ground, and wulf is staring at it while bren talks to trent. it’s hard to tell where he’s looking in the second one, but a later frame makes it clear that he’s looking in the direction of a body.

in the first one particularly, he looks to me like he’s visibly upset — his face isn’t as stoic as the others, and his body language looks uncertain, not his usual crossed-arm stance.

these were the moments that first caught my eye. they brought up questions in my mind: what is he thinking? what’s going through his head as he looks at the people they just hurt?

exhibit b: the bath scene

this comes immediately after the second body, and is what confirmed in my mind that wulf definitely isn’t entirely on board with the things they’re being told to do.

he closes the door behind them and just stands with his fist against it. none of them look happy by any means, but it’s clear that he’s upset to a point where even bren and astrid, in the midst of their own feelings, look concerned and go to comfort him.

bren in particular takes a long moment with him before the two of them rejoin astrid. i’ll get into why that — and bren’s role in general — is significant in a moment.

exhibit c: the morning after

this is the most important point in all of this, and the significance of his reaction here really can’t be understated.

in this moment, trent has just drawn their attention to their “memories” of their parents defying the empire. these are, from their point of view, very real and undeniable memories. and yet, the reaction we see here from wulf is one of explicit and absolute rejection.

and he’s not just denying what trent wants him to believe — he’s angry. he’s standing up and slamming a hand on table and raising his voice. doubt has been simmering under the surface in him for a while now, and this is the moment that trent crosses a line. trent has presented something truly unthinkable to him and despite his own memories supporting it, he absolutely cannot believe it. on a very visceral level, he knows it can’t be right.

this moment is significant not only because it confirms beyond a shadow of a doubt that wulf is not completely sure of what they’re doing, but also because we literally never see another student of trent openly defy him like this, nor do we see any volstrucker do so.

let me repeat that: until caleb goes up against him with the nein, eadwulf is the only person we ever see look trent in the eye and say “you’re wrong.” even after all of campaign two, we never see someone actively working under him defy him that explicitly — it’s only caleb, who escaped his control, or people like the nein with no real connection to him. even when astrid acts against him, she does it very quietly and is clearly terrified of those actions being alluded to at the dinner. wulf is the only one we ever see who, while at trent’s mercy, dares to openly and completely reject him.

bringing his family into it was a step too far. at this point, wulf isn’t just struggling with what they’re being told — he’s absolutely not having it anymore.

so what gives?

we know that he ultimately believes trent enough to kill his parents, and is even the first of the three to do it, so how do we get to that level of agreement from such a powerful moment of anger and denial?

that’s where bren comes in.

looking back at that breakfast scene, we can also see how the other two react to their own memories coming to light.

astrid’s is one of betrayal. she’s confused and struggling to understand why they would do it, but she doesn’t deny it either.

bren’s, on the other hand, is one of defeat. he’s clearly upset, but he’s simultaneously totally certain that what they’re remembering is true. and of course he is — his memory has been impeccable his entire life. why would he start to question it now, even if he doesn’t want to believe what it’s telling him?

bottom line: while astrid clearly also struggles with it and may have her own doubts, though not as strong as wulf’s, bren takes it all in stride and never wavers.

and if there’s one thing we know about wulf, it’s that he trusts his people. throughout his scenes in campaign two, we see him looking to astrid for signs of what to do or say and deferring to her when he’s overwhelmed by or unsure of the situation at hand. when caleb takes his hand at the blooming grove, he follows, and when astrid takes his hand and leads him away, he follows her. where they go, he follows. he trusts them implicitly and he looks to them when he doesn’t know what the right call is.

so what is he going to do in that moment, when his own mind is telling him something that he absolutely can’t believe and he doesn’t know how to reconcile it? he looks to them for guidance.

astrid clearly isn’t in a place to offer much, and hasn’t been. she’s not as lost in doubt as he is, but she’s not certain enough to reassure him either. we can already see that in the bath scene — remember when i said it was significant that bren is the one to stay with wulf while astrid goes off on her own? she wants to comfort him and tries to because she cares about him, but it seems that her conviction isn’t quite strong enough to be a steady base for someone else. and in the breakfast scene, we see that again, with her not openly going against it but still struggling with it in a way bren doesn’t.

bren, on the other hand, is consistently certain that they’re doing the right thing, even when it feels bad. caleb says as much himself when he first tells beau and nott his story: “i was so sure, i was so sure, until i wasn’t.” hearing his parents scream as they die is genuinely the first time he ever has doubts. until that moment, he’s sure. he trusts his mind and he trusts trent and he believes in their cause.

so when he sees wulf struggling with it, what does he do? he offers that certainty, reminds him of why they’re doing what they do, assures him that they’re doing the right thing and he doesn’t have to feel guilty. he’s their rock, the one wulf and astrid can trust to be sure even when their faith is shaken.

and that’s exactly what i think happens in the time between that breakfast and the night they kill their parents: bren sees wulf angry and totally lost trying to make sense of the massive gulf between what he remembers and what he knows to be true, he sees astrid confused and not able to put the pieces together, and he reassures them because he trusts his mind and so do they and he doesn’t want to see them struggle.

and i think astrid needs less convincing, but once she’s sure too and it’s only wulf that can’t accept it, that’s when he starts to think that maybe the unthinkable could really be true. bren is certain of what he remembers and astrid is certain that bren is right, so how can wulf, who trusts and relies on them so much for guidance, not at least entertain the idea that his parents really are traitors? how can he deny it and, in doing so, deny them?

that’s how he can ultimately go and do what he’s told, with such a stern and certain look on his face as he does. because his people were sure that it was the right thing to do, and no matter how strongly he feels that something must be wrong, he trusts them even more than he trusts himself.

that’s not to say that his doubts are completely quelled, though, because there’s still more of this thread that we can follow.

exhibit d: the aftermath

wulf’s move to knock bren out and save astrid is a quick and decisive one in the moment, but it’s clear that he isn’t at all sure if he did the right thing. he talks to trent — explaining himself, maybe even apologizing because he thinks he was wrong — and trent has to stop him and say that no, he was right.

this is significant for two reasons. the first and more obvious of the two is that this shows he’s still in a headspace of questioning what he’s doing almost immediately after doing it. that doubt was quelled long enough to allow him to complete the “exercise”, but not by any means gone for good.

the second, which i think is the most important to the person he ultimately becomes, is that this is the first time he’s had to look to trent for reassurance.

before this moment, it’s bren and astrid who comfort and reassure him. but now, bren is lost to them and astrid is in no shape to offer any comfort, much less give him the reassurance bren might have. and she might not want to do so even if she could — she wanted to save bren, not leave him behind, and may very well be angry at wulf for the choice he made. so what choice does he have, with neither of them able to support him, but to look to his mentor for reassurance?

and what happens once he gets that reassurance from trent? before, he doubted trent and even openly defied him, but can he continue to do that now?

if he wants to be able to live with himself after, to live with the choice he made and sleep at night, he has to believe that the reassurance trent offered him that night was right — he has to believe that trent’s judgment is right. if trent is lying or just wrong, that means he did the wrong thing that night, and where can he go from there?

that night is a turning point for wulf not just because he took his parents out of the picture, but because he made a decision that ended up forcing him to trust trent to an extent that he really didn’t before.

the new eadwulf

the wulf that we meet in campaign two as an adult is a far cry from the wulf who stood up at that table and said “no, they would never.” he comes across as largely apathetic to and even comfortable with the things they do — it’s just a job for him, not something to overthink or get hung up on. as far as he’s concerned, the lives they take are unfortunate but still necessary sacrifices, just like trent always said.

and if you ask me, his journey to becoming that person, to the doubt and the fire in him being all but completely stomped out, starts with the night he was forced to give up his one source of constant reassurance and finally put his trust in trent instead. everything we see him do to separate himself from his actions, from his belief in fate and his “good soldier” attitude to the drink he has ready after spending time with trent, stems from that moment. he is the way he is when we meet him not because he simply doesn’t care, but because he can no longer afford to.

caleb says they never wavered while he was with them, but i think it’s only because his vision was clouded by his own certainty that he never saw it. he just couldn’t believe that they might not believe in their cause as much as he did because it seemed so right to him, and how could he believe that the people he loved would doubt something so important?

but they did doubt it, especially wulf, and even as an adult, little bits of that stick around in him — he immediately gravitates toward caduceus after caduceus stands up to trent, and as soon as trent isn’t a threat anymore, he’s perfectly content to just stay with caleb (and probably would have if astrid hadn’t pulled him away when she did).

i think, if bren hadn’t been selected for the volstrucker program or just hadn’t been as confident as he was in all of it, it may very well have been eadwulf who found himself standing against trent in the end.

#thank you for coming to my ted talk #this turned out so much longer than i expected i just. have so many wulf thoughts #no clue if this made sense but i needed to write it all out #sometimes you gotta just. write an essay about some shit that no one asked to hear #cr meta #eadwulf grieve #blumendrei #caleb widogast #astrid becke #bren aldric ermendrud #eodwulf grieve #blumentrio #c2 #the mighty nein #critical role #critical role meta

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rainbowcaleb · 2 years

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if you’ve never seen CR the animated recap sums up all you need to know about Eadwulf: forearms and raven feather

#really distilled down to his most important aspects 🤣🤣🤣#eadwulf grieve #eodwulf grieve #critical role #crit role recap #cr recap #critical role spoilers #cr spoilers #or however it’s spelled

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neinofthem · 2 years

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critical role campaign two, otherwise known as ‘caleb’s reverse harem feat. beauyasha’

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tangereendream · 1 year

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flat ass/fat ass is the idea relationship which is why Essek and Wulf are perfect for each other

happy esswulf wednesday!

#happy esswulf wednesday #esswulf #wulfsek #shadowulf #essek thelyss #eadwulf grieve #eodwulf grieve #eadwulf #eodwulf #essek thelyss/eadwulf grieve #eadwulf grieve/essek thelyss #essek thelyss/eodwulf grieve #eodwulf grieve/essek thelyss #critical role #cr #critical role fanart #cr fanart #astrid beck

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misscryptidart · 2 years

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Cerberus Assembly Treason 2!!! They did it again!

#cr #cr3 #critical role #critical role fanart #critical role spoilers #bells hells #astrid beck #eodwulf grieve #cerberus assembly

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esswulf-wednesday · 1 year

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Spring is in the Air

Hello and welcome to the Esswulf Wednesday Club Tag Fill event for the month of March! We aim to fill out the Eadwulf Grieve/Essek Thelyss tag on ao3 and make our rarepair a little less rare.

Submissions can be fic, art, songs, or whatever else you want to contribute.

You can write or draw whatever you want, but we'll provide themes and prompts for you to use or draw inspiration from.

Post your submission on Wednesday March 29th, 2023 and tag your work with Esswulf Wednesday Club Tag Fill Event. Be sure to send us a link!

To join the Esswulf Wednesday Club Discord Server, send us an ask or a message. 18+ only!

March's Theme: Spring is in the Air

🧺Picnic Date

💐Florist AU

☔Caught in the Rain

💋Spring Fling

😏The Birds and the Bees

🥚Mating Season

🪦Bringing Flowers to a Grave

⛈️Storms

🤒Spring Fever

🧹Spring Cleaning

🐸Amphibian Migration (like all the big monsters in xhorhas? nergaliids?)

🎊Spring Festival

🌸Cherry Blossom

🌻The Zemni Fields Are Blooming

🪴Carnivorous Plants

🎓Graduation

#critical role #critical role fanfiction #critical role fanfic #cr #cr fanfic #essek thelyss #eadwulf grieve #esswulf #shadowulf #wulfsek #happy esswulf wednesday #essek thelyss/eadwulf grieve #eadwulf grieve/essek thelyss #essek/eadwulf #eadwulf/essek #eodwulf grieve #essek/eodwulf #eodwulf/essek

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your-turn-to-role · 3 years

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tfw your ex boyfriend is trying to stab you with swords while your maybe boyfriend is behind you casting support spells and over there the girl you kinda wish was your girlfriend is mind controlling your ex girlfriend

#yes im still on the bisexual maelstrom tack bc i think it's really funny #cr2 #cr spoilers #c2e141 #cr liveblog #caleb widogast #astrid beck #eodwulf grieve #essek thelyss #jester lavorre #bisexual maelstrom

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lostsometime · 3 years

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I’m sorry, but I’m just thinking about how what Eodwulf’s experience of who Caduceus is is absolutely fucking wild. Like, in the 3 times he has really interacted with this guy, can you imagine what Caduceus looks like to him?

The first time you see him, he’s accompanying your ex-boyfriend to the Sanitarium, a location that is severely fraught for both of you. You notice that he’s surrounded by new friends - very colorful, and apparently largely foreigners. The big pink one openly wears the symbol of a forbidden goddess. He either does not know or does not care that doing this could get him arrested.

Also, your ex is still hot and you don’t know what to do with this.

The next time you see him is when you are actually spending a significant amount of time with your ex for the first time in almost 20 years. All his new friends are coming, and so is your mutual abuser, so you can’t really talk to him, but oh well. His friends are needlessly petty about the seating arrangements. The pink one, however, is polite.

For some reason you decide to react to this by making a snarky and somewhat racist comment about him, and he returns with so smooth and confident a burn you almost can’t be sure if he meant it as one or not. Maybe he’s just genuinely guileless and good-natured? You have literally not talked to someone guileless and good-natured since you were fifteen.

It is a deeply tense evening, and you spend most of it stuffing food in your mouth so you have an excuse not to talk or answer any questions. At the end of it you realize that, no, the pink one was definitely throwing shade at you earlier. You know this because he decides to openly insult Trent Ikithon, the person you fear and hate most in the world and potentially the most powerful man in the country. He throws this shade very eloquently and politely and it is the closest to speechless you have ever seen Trent.

You decide to get drunk.

(You see him again, briefly, in Nicodranas while trying to circumvent your orders to arrest your ex. You thought you were doing pretty well being subtle with your charm spells, but apparently he noticed anyway. Is there anything he doesn’t notice?)

Finally, you are brought as backup when Trent actually goes to confront your ex. This, it turns out, is happening at Pink One’s family home. You can tell it’s his family home because his entire family is there, and they are also Large and Pink. You set the house on fire.

The house is also a temple.

You are a fairly religious man, and you would probably feel bad about this, if you weren’t so good at thoroughly repressing all your bad feelings about everything you’ve been asked to do for the past twenty years. It’s been very helpful to think of everything you’ve done as being in some way the will of your goddess. It is very difficult to categorize “burning down a temple” under the heading of “things my goddess is cool with,” but hey, you’ve been ignoring your cognitive dissonance since you were 17 and you’ve gotten pretty damn good at it.

This is the first time you’ve really seen Pink One get angry. You don’t see it for very long, because you get your ass kicked by some of Bren’s other friends very quickly and fall unconscious.

You later learn that Pink One stopped you from dying.

He lives in a graveyard, and you worship a death goddess, and he saved your life. It feels like there’s something wrong with this but you don’t actually know enough about the gods to figure out what.

...you help put out the fire.

#cr spoilers #cr speculation #cr meta #my meta #eodwulf grieve #caduceus clay

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felixora · 3 years

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"Have you heard the tale of the Fox, the Cat and the Wolf?" The ending for their stories was bittersweet but very fulfilling. I'm extremely grateful for all the creativity and work Liam and Matthew put in these characters.

#critical role fanart #crit role #mighty nein #blumendrei #caleb widogast #astrid beck #eadwulf grieve #eodwulf critical role #digital art #artwork #cr 2

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venndaai · 3 years

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You’re having ~hex~ with each other!

We’re in hex, bitch!

#cr spoilers #critical role #fjord stone #eadwulf grieve #eodwulf grieve #fjulf #fjordwulf #fjorwulf #whatever we're going with here #i didn't gif wulf walking away from fjord and then embarrassingly falling on his face because i love him

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aeoris4lovers · 5 months

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in honor of my spotify wrapped this year being 99% songs from my wulf playlists

#sometimes the need to make wulf memes possessed me and then suddenly it’s 5am #cr memes #eadwulf grieve #eodwulf grieve #the mighty nein #c2 #wizardposting #critical role

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stardustedknuckles · 3 years

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Beau spends days and weeks listening to and recording the stories of the Drei. Sometimes they come in alone. Sometimes with Caleb. Rarely the three of them together.

The stories from Astrid are the hardest for Beau to record, because Astrid’s mind is sharp enough to expose every facet of the gaslighting she faced over the years. She’s known for a long time, maybe since the night they lost Caleb, how very trapped she was. Listening to her describe how she endured, even forced herself to push down thoughts of escape just to survive, makes Beau’s blood boil. That was her, once, and she never quite knew how to feel about it on the other side. It’s so much easier to be angry and hurt on behalf of Caleb’s old friends.

Not realizing she’s frozen mid-sentence with the quill in her hand, repeating Astrid’s last few words in her head on a loop until there’s a very hesitant finger touched to the back of her hand. She blinks up back to the present, returns Astrid’s stoic nod, and they get back to work.

Because all of this recording of the abuse Caleb and his friends suffered at the hands of Trent - much of the exact details are foreign to Beau. But the why of them, the intent of someone in authority to break them down to the point they obey without question and take what they are given and think themselves glad, that is viciously, intimately familiar.

This work, in effect, is the dry run for her testimony against Zeenoth and her father. It’s through the Drei that Beau processes even a little bit of what happened to her, spares a moment of that anger and sorrow for herself when the day is done and she’s safe in Yasha’s arms.

And when the trial comes, when Beau looks out over the courtroom and locks eyes with Yasha, there’s Caleb next to her on one side. A nice surprise, but not wholly unexpected.

What is unexpected is the presence of the other two faces on Yasha’s other side. Unfamiliar but instantly recognizable regardless, watching with quiet support.

There isn’t an unclenched jaw in the room when Beau is finished - not from the Soul agents who have welcomed her gladly as one of their own, not from her girlfriend or her brother, and not from the two ex-volstrucker who showed up for Expositor Beauregard Lionett the way she showed up for them.

#cr spoilers #beauregard lionett #yasha #caleb widogast #blumentrio #blumendrei #astrid beck #eodwulf #eodwulf grieve #(if that is his last name and not a command from liam lol)#Empire siblings #Empire kids

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