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edupunkn00b · 10 months

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Overruled, Chapter 7: Seven O'Clock

Prev - Seven O'Clock - Masterpost - [ AO3 ]

Day 7 of @loceitweek, Watch/Clock Tower. I took some liberties with this title given the left turn the characters brought the story at the end there. Can't fight the power of intruloceit!

WC: 3774 - Rated T - CW: some swearing, discussions of sex

Janus had asked to meet at seven o’clock at the café but Logan arrived early to secure their table. And to give himself something to do after he’d finished his conversation with Remus.

The surprise in Remus’ voice when he’d called still squeezed his heart.

Then his heart had cracked right through when Remus had explained it was because he’d thought last night had been their final date.

“Remus…” The other man’s silence had stunned him, as though part of him still expected Logan to reject him. “Nothing could be further from the truth.” He paused, but Remus was still quiet, listening. “I… I am quite fond of you and…” If they’d had this much difficulty communicating face to face, there was no way this conversation would work over the phone.

“Are you free to go for a walk together?” he asked, impulse overriding his sense at the last minute request to get together.

“You want to see me now?” The incredulity in his voice stung and Logan didn’t need much imagination to picture those bright green eyes wide with shock. Or narrowed and guarded with suspicion.

“To talk and… make plans for another date if you are amendable,” Logan explained. “Only if you are not busy. I would understand if—”

“Meet me at my room.” There was a muffled sound like he’d covered the mouthpiece and another voice. After a moment, Remus returned. “Please,” he added.

“I will be there in ten minutes.”

Nine and a half minutes later, Logan knocked on Remus; door, the sketchbook and charcoals from last night tucked under his arm, and a pale green celosia bloom in his other hand. He smiled when Remus opened the door and he offered the flower. “Remus, thank you for—” he started, then stopped, eyes narrowed as he peered closely at the other man’s face. “Remus?” he said. Something wasn’t right.

“Good,” the other man said, unsmiling. “You passed.”

“I told you he’d be able to tell the difference,” Remus said from behind the door. He stepped out and tilted his head toward the nearly identical man standing next to him. “Roman, this is Logan. Logan,” he smiled, gaze lingering on the flower in his hand. “This is my brother, Roman.”

“You didn’t mention your brother was your twin,” Logan nodded, looking between them. Particularly side-by-side, their eyes and mouths were immediate giveaways. Then he noticed how differently they were dressed, with Roman in a flowy, deep crimson top tucked neatly into impeccable dark indigo jeans and matching argyle socks. Remus was barefoot and wore ripped cutoff jean shorts and a sleeveless Green Day hoodie over a long-sleeved waffle knit henley.

“I suppose you don’t get mistaken for each other very often,” he murmured.

“On the contrary,” Roman groaned, rolling his eyes.

Remus reached for the flower Logan still offered. “Okay, can I go out and play now?” he grinned at his brother.

“Not yet,” Roman said, hard green eyes boring into Logan. He squared his shoulders and smiled faintly when he realized he was slightly taller. Then he stabbed a finger at Logan’s chest and frowned. “You make my brother cry again—”

“Ro!”

Roman turned to his Remus. “He did.” He waited until Remus gave a half nod, looking down at the floor, then returned fiery eyes to him. Logan’s heart clenched at the way Remus curled into himself, but he dragged his eyes away to face Roman’s fury. “If you hurt him again, I will find a way to hurt you.”

“I assure you,” Logan inclined his head to Roman. “I was completely unaware the way we ended our evening caused Remus any pain. It was never my intention and if I’d had any inkling…” He turned to Remus, searching his eyes. The surprise in his voice when he’d answered echoed through his mind. “If I’d had any inkling of the impression I’d left you with, I would have elaborated last night. I am truly sorry I hurt you, Remus.

“I intend to rectify that error. To make amends and find a way to make it up to you.” He bowed his head with a little smile and offered his now empty hand. “If you will allow me?”

“What kind of flower is that?” Roman asked, eyes narrowed. Remus examined it more closely, and his face exploded in a grin.

“It is a celosia bloom,” Logan said smoothly, winking at Remus. “It has been known by other names as well, of course.”

“We’re going!” Remus announced, ruffling his brother’s hair as he passed. Roman squealed and scrambled to smooth his locks back into their previous style. “Thanks, Ro, don’t wait up!” he laughed.

Roman pierced Remus with a glare. “You’re not getting out of dinner tonight!” Remus simply waved and Roman rolled his eyes then, let the door slam shut.

Standing together in the comparatively silent hallway, Remus grinned at him.

“We have much to discuss before that sort of date,” Logan murmured with a little smile.

“Yeah, I figured,” Remus shrugged. “I just like fucking with him.”

Chuckling, Logan tapped the flower in his hand. “May I?” he asked. When Remus nodded, he tucked the flower into Remus’ hair. “Lovely.”

“You know this is a cockscomb, right?” Remus asked, waggling his eyebrows and brushing his fingers over the fuzzy petals.

“Mm-hm,” Logan hummed, offering his arm with another little wink. “I grow them in a flower box in my apartment.”

“You are full of surprises, Nerdy Wolverine,” Remus purred, tentatively hooking his hand on Logan’s forearm. His fingers relaxed, then, after a moment, gripped with more confidence.

Logan smiled back at him, then tucked Remus’ hand a little closer against his side. “As are you, Prince Remus.”

They walked together in near silence until they’d reached the Quad. The paths were mostly empty, that quiet period on campus when late afternoon classes hadn’t yet ended and the dining hall wouldn’t open for another hour or so. Remus chewed his bottom lip, fingers twitching and tracing the seams on Logan’s sleeve. His other hand was shoved in his pocket and he watched his feet as they walked.

Finally, he looked up at Logan. “So last night really wasn’t a… a pity date? I didn’t… I didn’t fuck everything up and make you…” His shoulders curled in when Logan stopped walking and faced him. “Make you not want me?” he said, voice uncharacteristically quiet.

“Oh, Remus, no,” Logan shook his head gently and set down the art supplies. He cupped Remus’ cheek, thumb brushing gently over his lower lip to free it from between his teeth. “Last night was wonderful. You were wonderful.”

“But I… I didn’t do anything.” Confusion and sadness battled in Remus’ eyes and it was all Logan could do not to just pull him into his arms and kiss away his worries. But that was exactly what Remus didn’t need in this moment. “You snuck me into the library and bought me such a thoughtful gift and brought a picnic and…” He met Logan’s eyes. “And I didn’t do anything.”

“Remus, you were you,” he said, bringing both hands up to either side of his face. “I got to share a place I love with you. And you shared your wonder with me. And your art.” Remus’ eyes widened, the tiniest spark of a smile lighting up his face. “You were funny and creative and smart and beautiful and…” Logan nodded, breath hitching. “And, yes, very sexy,” he added, voice lowering. “I believe you… perceived that when we were kissing.”

Remus’ cheeks warmed beneath his hands and the memory alone was enough to make Logan’s pulse race. Then Remus’ face fell, confusion returning.

“But… but why didn’t you want to… to be with me? Everyone else I’ve been out with… that’s…”

A pair of undergrads meandered down the path, drawing nearer. Logan scanned the quad before pointing to a large ginkgo tree a few dozen yards away. “May we sit and talk?”

He nodded and walked with Logan toward the tree, a bit of his smile returning when Logan reached for his hand and laced their fingers together. They settled at the roots of the tree, Logan’s back against the trunk, with Remus leaning against his chest. He sighed, a brief, content smile flashing across his face, arms covering Logan’s around his middle.

“Remus, you are worth so much more than a single night of pleasure,” Logan began plainly, leaving nothing to chance, nothing to interpretation. “Yes, I want you.” Remus turned in his arms to face him, and hooked both legs over one of Logan’s. “I am very attracted to you,” he said quietly, rubbing circles against the small of his back. “But not only physically.”

He smiled when Remus met his eyes. “I want to get to know more of you. The parts I’ve already seen, your energy, your humor, your intelligence… your sensitivity… You are remarkable.” He brushed a soft kiss at the corner of his mouth. “I care for you, Remus. And I feel we have the potential to build something truly beautiful between us.”

“I… I’d like that. But…” Remus hung his head. “I might have already fucked that all up.”

“You’ve done nothing wrong,” Logan insisted.

“I…” He shook his head, hiding his face against Logan’s chest. “You didn’t hear what I did yet.”

Logan didn’t let go, simply nodded and murmured. “I’m listening.”

“Well, last night, I… I was really upset and… That’s not your fault, I’m not saying that, I…” Slouched against Logan’s chest, he glanced up and winced. “I went for a walk and I… I bumped into Janus and…”

Logan frowned. “Did you fight with him?”

“Oh, no!” Remus shook his head. “No, no, Janus is cool, I…” He shifted against Logan’s chest, head hung low. “I slept with him. And… I’m… I’m going to see him again.”

“Oh,” Logan breathed. Cold seeped up from the ground and through his skin and he closed his eyes.

‘We won’t all break your heart, Logan…’

“Are you…” Logan’s voice cracked. Had he just made a fool of himself? Had he already lost his chance with Remus? And Janus… He pushed away that thought. One person at a time. While Remus wouldn’t meet his eyes, he hadn’t pulled away and he’d agreed to speak with him. Perhaps…

He took a deep breath and wrestled down his initial assumptions. And his hurt.

“Does this…” He pressed his lips together, momentarily grateful Remus had hid his face. It meant he didn’t need to hide his own. “Does this impact your desire to pursue a relationship with me?”

Remus’ head jerked up and Logan—too slowly—papered a neutral expression over his face. “Logan…” he whispered, reaching up to touch his cheek. “No!” he said firmly. “No, I was afraid it would make you not want me. I… I like both of you,” he admitted.

A low chuckle melted the ice in Logan’s chest and he nodded. “I care for both of you, too.”

“I told him so!” Remus laughed, draping his arms over Logan’s shoulders. “Jannie will be fucking thrilled to hear that!”

Logan nuzzled against his neck with a happy laugh, his sudden joy contagious. He breathed deeply, inhaling the intermingled scents of cloves and cinnamon and, yes, a faint brush of Janus’ cologne. He pulled back at a sudden worry. “Was he concerned your encounter would impact our relationship?”

“Fuck, no!” Remus shook his head and settled into Logan’s arms. “I told him you rejected me last night. No, Janus likes you, too.”

“Necktie?”

Janus’ voice pulled him from his reverie and he looked up before rising to his feet, chair scraping across the floor. He smoothed down his aforementioned tie and gestured to the seat in front of him. “I hope you do not mind, I took the liberty of saving us a table…” He looked around the nearly empty café. “Since it was so busy,” he added, putting on a wry grin.

“Excellent,” Janus bowed his head with a little smirk. “Otherwise, we might not have managed to find a place to sit.”

Despite the tension in his chest over Janus’ ominous ‘we have to talk’ message, despite his certainty Remus’ insistence that their feelings were mutual was—at best—magical thinking, Logan smiled as he sat and picked up his coffee.

“I should order,” Janus said, turning toward the counter. “I’ll—”

“Decaf affogato with cinnamon?” a server asked behind him, a pot of brewed coffee in one hand and a tiny ornate cup of coffee and ice cream in the other.

Janus raised an eyebrow and accepted the cup with a murmured thanks. The server refilled Logan’s mug and returned to the main counter.

“How—” Janus stared down at the cup in his hands before raising it close to his nose. He sniffed the blend of scents, a bit of steam billowing over his face. “How did you guess?”

“You have ordered that twice before during our study sessions here,” Logan shrugged with a smile. The pleased surprise in Janus’ eyes was a shot of warmth through his heart and his smile grew when he sat down across from him. “And you consistently order decaf after five o’clock.”

Cheeks flushed from the coffee’s heat, he stared back at Logan. “I like the aroma,” he murmured, before taking a careful sip. “Thank you, Necktie.”

“My pleasure,” he nodded, and took another sip of his coffee. “I… I know I said this earlier, but I am relieved you are well.” After walking Remus to the dining hall for his promised rendezvous with his brother, Logan finally recognized the timing of Janus’ absence and precisely why he’d slept so late.

“I… I am,” Janus said, almost surprised by his own answer. He addressed his cup rather than him. “Better than I have been in a long time.”

Logan’s heart clenched, an old but familiar ache. Still, he smiled and raised his cup. “That is wonderful to hear,” he said. Taking another slow sip of his coffee, he relished the bitter heat and watched how Janus continued to avoid his eyes.

He was now more sure than ever that the morning’s repeated messages had been what prompted Janus’ request for an audience with him and he blessed Remus’ sweet heart for his assurances otherwise. Whatever it meant now, Logan was not sorry for messaging him. However… irritating it may have been for Janus given nothing was actually wrong, Logan would be hard pressed to apologize for reaching out. And if something had been wrong… he would not have wanted his personal feelings and earlier rejection to have prevented him from seeking to assist Janus when he needed him.

He waited for Janus to savor more of his drink before gently prompting. “While I will always enjoy sharing a coffee with you, Janus… you said we needed to talk?” Logan pressed a smile onto his face, hoping it counterbalanced his own reluctance to have this discussion. The speed with which his initial interest in Janus had morphed, gripping his heart and mind was… unnerving. It would hurt to hear Janus’ anticipated request for him to tone down his attention, but… he supposed it would be for the best in the end.

“I did, didn’t I?” Janus smiled and set down his cup. He blew out a sharp breath and nodded. His eyes danced around the table, moving from his own cup, to Logan’s tie, and back again. Finally, he leaned closer and met Logan’s eyes, face pale and hands twisted together on the edge of the table. The tips of his fingers were white.

“I slept with Remus last night,” he blurted out in a low voice.

“Yes, he told me,” Logan nodded, hiding his face behind his coffee cup. It hurt more than it should. But he didn’t own Remus and Janus had made his feelings clear, no matter Logan’s waning confidence he could somehow demonstrate that whatever he feared would not come to fruition if he took a chance with him. He knew in time the part of him that was genuinely happy for Janus, for both of them, would grow.

“What? He did?” Janus flushed bright red from his hairline down past his open collar. “Why would—When—when did you talk to him?”

“I called him just after five.” It had been the first of many conversations they still needed but Logan was… optimistic. Both that he could find a clearer way to express his needs and desires—and that Remus would, as well. “I was fortunate to catch him before he needed to meet his brother for dinner.”

“But why?” Janus looked dumbfounded. “What prompted the call?”

Logan tilted his head and peered back at Janus, brow furrowed in confusion. “I am dating him.” He leaned in, nodding slowly. “Remus shared with you his misconception that I was not interested in him because I did not consent to sex on our first date.”

“Could you describe that in a more clinical tone?”

He chuckled. “I am game to try.” After a moment, he sobered. “Oh… That means he was not aware of my true intentions when you two were together so you would not have discussed it. I…” While he was confident in both his and Remus’ capacity to care for and, perhaps, eventually love more than one person, he had no reason to believe Janus would feel the same. “I… I realize it is not technically my concern, but I hope this does not prevent you and Remus from—”

“Logan, stop,” Janus interrupted, reaching across the table and placing a hand over his. “While it would be healthy for us to discuss Remus at a later date, that is not the only thing we need to talk about. I am…” He squeezed Logan’s hand, warmth shooting up his arm. “I am relieved you are continuing to pursue a relationship with Remus. I had trouble believing you would simply reject him and…” Janus smiled. “I’m pleased to know you are the man I thought you were.”

Logan’s fingers wrapped around Janus’ and he nodded. “That means more to me than you might realize, Janus.” He smiled, promising himself he would release his hand after just a few more moments. “Thank you.”

Clouds passed over Janus’ eyes and Logan loosened his grip. They both knew Janus had more to share, even if it seemed neither wanted him to actually say it.

“Do you…” Janus began slowly. He hadn’t removed his hand and instead, sandwiched Logan’s between both of his. “Do you remember when you brought me to your apartment after the party?”

Logan nodded. He would never forget the pain and fear in Janus’ voice, nor, selfishly, the way his own songs seemed to have soothed him. “Of course,” he murmured, uncertain where this was leading, but he waited for him to continue.

Janus sighed, and a flicker of that evening’s pain pinched his face. Logan couldn’t help but squeeze his hand and Janus looked up, a bittersweet smile curling up his lips. “Gabe was—” His voice broke and Logan’s eyes widened. “I haven’t said his name out loud—consciously—since I moved here.” He looked down at their shared grip and added in a thin whisper. “Since I fled here.”

Fled?

‘Please, Gabe, please just promise me. Promise me you won’t go out there…’

A protective fire sparked in Logan’s chest and he drew closer. He strengthened his grip on Janus’ hand and brushed his thumb across the back in little swirls and he nodded.

“Gabe was my first love,” Janus continued in a low voice. “We fell in love in high school but I… I was a minister’s son and we had to hide our relationship.” His voice wavered and he moved one hand away to swipe at his face with a napkin. “Gabe—he didn’t care, though. He said it didn’t matter if we had to hide for a while because one day we’d get out, we’d run away and build a life far away from both our families and—” A stifled sob broke through and he covered his mouth with the tissue.

Logan slid his chair to the other side of the table, immediately next to Janus.

After a long moment, Janus lowered his hand and twisted the tissue around his fingers in his lap. “My brothers found us. We’d… In the winter we would meet in his parent’s old workshop and… I… I must’ve done a lousy job of hiding my car and… and they found us and they—”

He leaned against his side and Logan wrapped an arm around his shoulders, drawing him close. Janus curled into him and soon Logan felt hot tears through his shirt. “Gabe was dead before he even got to the ER,” he whispered past another quiet sob.

Logan held him while he cried, stroking his soft hair away from his face and humming quietly. Their server briefly caught his eye, then nodded and closed the table behind them, effectively blocking off their corner of the café. After a long while, Janus took in a shaky breath and looked up. “I promised myself I’d never let myself feel that kind of loss again. That I’d never let myself be hurt like that again.”

He looked down at their intertwined fingers. “But then I met you. And…” Janus sighed, shaky and broken. “And Remus.” He buried his face against Logan’s shoulder. “You fuckers just wouldn’t let me hide anymore,” shoulders shaking in something between a sob and a laugh.

“Oh, we excel at that,” he chuckled, his own throat tight with unshed tears. “I’m so sorry, Janus,” he whispered into his hair, rocking gently. “That’s so much loss.”

“I don’t want to lose anymore…” Janus looked up, eyes still overflowing with tears. “But right now the newest thing I may have lost…” He shook his head, mouth trembling. “Is a chance with you.”

“‘You haven’t,’” Logan whispered, brushing away his tears and smiling softly when Janus’ eyes flashed with recognition. “You’ve done nothing to damage that chance.”

Janus looked back at him, a shaky smile splashed across his face. He shook his head and opened and closed his mouth a few times before finally squeezing Logan’s hand. “Will you take me home?”

Logan’s eyebrows shot up and he started to speak but Janus smiled again. He reached out and brushed his fingertips over Logan’s lips, stilling him. His hand was warm and soft, and the tiny gesture sent heat racing across his skin.

“Not for…” Brow furrowed, he shook his head. “Just to sit together and… and talk?”

Nodding, Logan stroked his cheek and smiled. “It would be my pleasure.”

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mamapeach7 · 4 years

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Daeul

Preview / Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 / Chapter 8 / Chapter 9 / Chapter 10 / Chapter 11 / Chapter 12 / Chapter 13 / Chapter 14 / Chapter 15 / Chapter 16 / Chapter 17 / bonus

Chapter 15

Sundresses were her favourite -- most especially the plain white ones with the lace or doily trimming. She had three of them and two floral rompers which she figured would be ideal for the beach as to not get sand in her pants.

“Tahiti?”, she had reaffirmed with Hyuk once he told her where they would be going.

“Uh huh! Daeul loves tropical places -- I took him to Hawaii last year. Although it was kind of lonely with just the two of us.”, the man pulled a sour face, sitting on the desk of his office, it being only the second time he had allowed Hanji to come in.

Minji had declined the offer to tag along, saying she needed to do her share of work at the art gallery she and her friend Joel worked at.

Hanji rolled her eyes at the excuse, knowing perfectly well that her sister often let Joel do all the work with the phone calls to and from other facilities. She had even put on a deceitful pity look when she had said no to her offer, whispering a “enjoy the week with the songwriter, though”.

There’s a lot of sun in Tahiti. And maybe a few bugs, Hanji placed a finger to her chin as she sat on the floor with her luggage in front of her.

Never mind the bugs, idiot girl -- at least you’re going on vacation. As true as that was she still had to take care of Daeul. Regardless of where they were, her position still remained the same and as close as she and Hyuk have gotten, his words of reminder still lingered in her head.

You’re his nanny.

“You wanna sit next to Hanji or me? Or you can sit alone over there and she and I can sit together.”

Hyuk held his son in his arms, teasing him about where he would be sitting for the plane ride. Daeul flashed him an unamused look making the two adults bellow out in laughter. His dad had decided to place him next to Hanji who sat next to the window, himself being a chair over the aisle.

It was Hanji’s first time on an airplane, let alone first class. Although she felt it was somewhat unnecessary considering she could handle the eighteen hour flight (with one stop-over). The issue however, was Daeul who became restless within less than two hours of the flight.

“Even in the air, you still give me a hard time.”, she joked as she carefully held him in her arms and brought him up close to the window, pointing to the gray clouds which would soon fade as the sky began to darken.

When the boy had finally fallen asleep, Hanji desperately needed to use the washroom. She struggled as she tried to place him down in his seat which would cause him to fuss about.

“Here, lemme have him.”, Hyuk suggested, seeing her struggle with the child. She gratefully smiled and placed him on his father’s chest and he immediately cosied up to the man, his cheeks pressed against his sweater.

She mentally captured a photo of the two -- one of the first and hopefully not the last times that both of them had fallen asleep at the same time.

Upon their arrival in Tahiti, the sun had already begun to set -- a pink and orange hued sky lay above them.

They had decided to settle for a simple dinner at the small bar and resto next to the shore, sitting at a small round table. Mahi Mahi was definitely a first for everyone but it was needless to say that they enjoyed it.

A few meters from them resided a small stage, a band playing soft jazz music to accompany the guests along with dim lights to set the mood.

One of the head waiters had instantly recognized Hyuk as they entered the restaurant, being quick to assist the trio. “Dean”, he had even called him.

Usually he would be open with taking photos but considering he was on vacation with his family, he settled for an autograph on a small piece of memo instead.

“Sir.”, the same waiter approached their table later on in the night.

“If you don’t mind, the crowd would love to hear you perform here tonight. I-It would certainly be an honour.”, he shyly asked, lowering his head in humility.

Although he wanted to keep his vacation lowkey, Hyuk’s main concern was that he hadn’t sung in years -- the last time being months before Daeul was born. But then he turned to his son and the woman next to him who both smiled warmly, almost encouraging him with their eyes to go on.

And before he knew it he was on stage once more. It wasn’t like he didn’t sing at all -- he hummed melodies in the studio each time he wrote a new song. However, singing a full three-minute song in a room full of families was something he hadn’t done in what seemed like forever.

“Please give your warm welcome to our guest!”, the restaurant owner applauded much to which everyone else obliged.

“Alright, gimme a d-minor-nine.”, he pointed to the small band behind him.

He gripped the mic with his right hand, closing his eyes for a few moments as he took in the familiar chords and melodies.

It seemed like someone else in the audience recognized it too as Oh Hanji began to smile widely at the familiar tune of Half Moon.

love, love the stars

love, love the moon

Oh, he’s still got it. She nodded her head softly to the music, noticing Daeul sway side to side which made her giggle and tap his chin playfully.

A certain giddiness inside her almost made her want to jump out of her chair in excitement that he had chosen to sing one of her favourites.

It was the first time she had heard him sing in real life -- she hated admitting to her sister that she lowkey listened to his songs every now and then but refrained from watching the music videos, most especially Bonnie and Clyde for as much as she loved history, for some reason he heart couldn’t bear seeing him touch another woman.

He opened and shut his eyes over and over again throughout his performance but on one particular opening, his eyes fell on Hanji.

Sitting on a short stool in one of her beloved sundresses, next to Daeul whose sways were offbeat. It was almost a scene out of a movie -- their eyes locked for the remaining five lines of his song, everything else seemed to fade and all he could see was purity.

She was purity.

Her warm look of admiration, the tilted head and rosey cheeks and tight smile.

W-What are my lyrics again?

Snapping out of his daze, he realized he missed a whole line and just sang the last two in hopes of covering up his distracted mistake.

The applause was definitely something he missed but Daeul clapped for him every day for no apparent reason and even if he were applauded in a room full of thousands of people, it couldn’t compare to his son’s open-palmed claps.

Hanji’s own daze was interrupted by a ringing coming from her phone and as much as she hated it, she had to rip her eyes away from Hyuk.

“Hanji! Guess what!”, it was Minji who for some reason managed to call long distance.

Pulling her phone away from her ear as her other hand tried to keep Daeul balanced on his chair, she replied, “Why are you so damn loud?”

“I’m seriously going to owe Joel for this one -- a curator who works in Manchester came in today to discuss a collab and Joel mentioned you. And get this! He wants you to send your best work to him!”

Oh my gosh.

And though this was a moment of celebration, she struggled to feel it within her for all she could focus on was the man still on stage whom she knew she might have to leave behind.

Fun Story Fact #15

Both Hanji and Minji studied social science in high school and college.

#dean #deantrbl #deanfluenza #kwon hyuk #story

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dykephannie · 7 years

Text

Virtuoso

summary: Phil Lester and Dan Howell both consider themselves the top selections for the best orchestra at their elite music university, and find themselves competing for the position.

genre: angst

tw: stress to the point of not eating or sleeping

word count: 4.5k

a/n: do you like my fics? would you like to have a sneak peak at what fics are coming up? are you reading this in your head like an infomercial? then you should follow my twitter! i am kinda desperate for followers but it’s also where i post my random dnp thoughts and phanfic sneak previews! please check it out and give it a follow if you’d like!

Phil had always been pretty good at the violin.

He had picked it up when he was five, sent through grueling lessons that hardened the tips of his fingers with callouses and cramped his wrist until his bow hold was perfect.

His teacher was strict and insistent. If Phil didn't come to his lessons with at least 8 hours of practice under his belt, his teacher was always able to tell, and there was always a punishment. But Phil was grateful for what he had endured. It brought him to the gates of Canterbury Academy, the most prestigious music school in the country, where he was guaranteed a spot in their second string orchestra. He intended to make the first string by the first audition in the first month of the school year.

Dan thought he was a pretty good violin player too.

Of course, he didn't have the kind of training that Phil had. When he was in middle school he had stumbled across a video of someone doing a violin compilation of video game soundtracks, and all he knew from that moment on was he wanted to do that. He saved up and bought a used violin that was nearly an octave out of tune, but Dan figured out quickly that he had enough of a knack for notation and pitch to fix it. And that natural talent had also landed him in the second best orchestra of Canterbury Academy.

Where he, too, intended to reach the most elite orchestra of the school.

“So what's your major?”

Phil knew that Canterbury was open to all types of musical geniuses. Yet he still thought they would be arranged in dorm buildings with people of similar majors. Phil’s RA indicated otherwise.

“Classical,” Phil said, adjusting his grip on his suitcase. The tiny girl in front of him smiled.

“Sick. I’m a music comp major, but I play drums with the rock band and other cool shit like that.” Z, as she had introduced herself, had frizzy hair dyed electric pink, which was barely contained in two buns at the top of her head. Her face glittered with piercings in her lip, eyebrow, up and down her ears, and in her nose. Her large brown eyes were ringed with blue eyeliner, and her hands rested casually in the pockets of her ripped jean shorts.

“Well, it’s uh, nice to meet you.”

“Likewise. Your room is down that way and to the left.” Z pointed with a long, black fingernail down the hall.

“Thanks.”

“Sure. Let me know if you've got an issue!”

Phil shot her an awkward thumbs up and headed for the direction she had pointed in, struggling with fitting the key into the lock. His dorm building was one of the oldest on campus, which meant ancient locking mechanisms and, as he soon discovered, a total of two power outlets.

Both beds in the dorm room were empty, and after a brief moment of deliberation, Phil placed his violin case on the one on the left. He sighed and glanced out the window. His room overlooked the gardens behind the house, decorated with white roses and finely trimmed hedges. The school was almost as gorgeous as the music it produced.

Phil was shocked from his daze by someone knocking on his door. It was wide open, so the knock was unnecessary. The guy had curly hair and bright green eyes, holding a large, curved music case in his hand. He had what seemed to be a permanent, friendly smile on his face.

“Hey! You must be Phil!”

“And you must be PJ.” Phil had been in contact with his roommate for a few weeks before the beginning of school. He was a jazz comp major, if Phil remembered correctly, and in that curved case there must have been a saxophone.

“So uh, have you been here long?”

“No, not really. Haven’t even had the chance to unpack.”

“Oh, haha.” PJ’s smiled wavered a bit. “Right.”

The awkwardness uncomfortably settled in the stuffy air of the tiny dorm room. Phil quickly turned to his suitcase, unzipping it and letting it fall open. It was going to be a long year.

On the opposite side of the campus, Dan lounged on his bed, a joint in between his lips, as his roommate tuned his cello next to him.

“Higher,” Dan told him as a slightly flat C reverberated around the room.

“My chromatic says it’s fine.”

“Don’t trust a chromatic, Anthony.” Dan flipped over on his side, giving his roommate a cocky grin. “Trust my perfect ears.”

“Yeah whatever.” Anthony set his cello down and wandered across the room, the floorboards squeaking underneath his feet. He snatched the joint from Dan’s mouth and took a drag. “You’re a pretentious little fucker, you know that?”

“That’s bold, coming from someone who just met me an hour ago and plays the cello.”

Anthony snorted, obviously trying to stifle his laughter. And Dan felt incredibly confident that he had made his first college friend.

Dan and Anthony walked to their first rehearsal together the next day. They had been placed in the same orchestra, and the anticipation of their chair assignments weighed heavy on their chests as they walked, Anthony tugging his cello behind him.

Phil was also nervous as his footsteps led him in the same direction, alone apart from his violin case clutched tightly in his hand. PJ had woken up at 5 that morning, trying and failing to be as quiet as he could as he changed into workout gear and closed the door behind him. Unfortunately the door wouldn’t properly close unless it was slammed, so Phil was shocked awake by both PJ’s jazzy alarm tone and the loud thump as the door shut. Waking up that early did not mix well with staying up wracked with stress the entire night, and Phil was extremely paranoid that he would fall asleep at his music stand before he even set his bow on the strings of his violin.

The class was stirring with the plucking of strings and the murmur of anxious students, no one daring to even touch the plastic chairs before receiving an assignment. The quiet that fell over the room when the teacher walked in was eerie.

“Everyone tuned up?” she asked. She appeared strict, with a tight black bun and slight wrinkles at the corner of her eyes. “Good.”

She tapped her baton on the edge of her music stand. “We’ll proceed with chair auditions. I assume everyone has prepared a piece?”

Phil confidently reached into his case and pulled out a Bach sonata he had been perfecting. But halfway across the room, Dan’s blood had turned cold. He had all the music they were to play for the month, but that was it. It hadn’t even occurred to him to bring an audition piece.

“Alright, we’ll start with basses and work upwards. Ms. Fiona Del Rose, what piece will you be auditioning with?”

Dan loosened and tightened his bow hairs nervously. At least he had some time to think.

That time did not last long.

“Daniel Howell?”

Dan shrugged away his fear. “Uh, just Dan is fine. And I’ll be auditioning with… a medley of music from Final Fantasy 7.”

The conductor was taken aback, but Dan was playing before she could object.

Phil’s hands had been glued to the fingerboard of his violin, incessantly pressing the tips of his fingers up and down and zoning out as he practiced soundlessly. But when he heard Dan’s opening notes, his eyes found him immediately. The song was one he recognized, one that filled him with the nostalgia of playing video games late at night, after all his violin practice and homework had been done, when he could finally feel like a real kid. And Daniel Howell’s rendition was even better than be original.

Dan was extremely talented. Phil supposed that everyone here was, but the way Dan drew his bow across the string and swayed ever so slightly with the rhythm of the music was the kind of talent that was completely natural. His bow hold was sloppy, but strong nonetheless. His vibrato was awkward, but the notes were angelic, like they had been sung instead of played. Phil was enchanted, from the first measure to the last.

“Philip Lester?”

“What?”

The conductor was staring down at him, brow furrowed. “Your audition piece, Mr. Lester.”

Someone in the room coughed. “Oh uh, right. Hang on.”

Flustered, Phil placed his music on his stand and shouldered his violin, trying to stop his fingers from shaking as he carefully lowered the bow onto the string.

The sonata was short and sweet, but by the end of it, Phil felt like a mess. The entire time he played he couldn't stop thinking about Dan and the way he had performed. His eyes carefully scanned the room to find Dan conversing quietly with a curly haired cello player. He looked up when he noticed Phil staring. They locked eyes for a brief moment before Phil shifted his glance away.

“Thank you, Mr. Lester. Who’s next?”

By the time all he auditions were completed, Phil’s anxiety had only grown. He was certain that he had played that F sharp out of tune, and shortened a half

note like, two times. The conductor’s stern gaze swooping across the room didn't do much to ease his nerves either.

“My name is Ms. Sullivan. Welcome to Canterbury Chamber Orchestra B. It is a huge honor to be accepted into this orchestra. However I understand that Chamber Orchestra A may be a goal for a vast majority of you.” Sullivan paused. “I have spoken with the conductor of said orchestra, and he’s agreed to open auditions every month.”

The volume in the room increased as the space filled with murmurs. Phil’s fingers tightened around the neck of his violin.

“Auditions will be open to all of you at the end of the month, yet I do not encourage you to audition if you are placed in the lower half of the seating for your section,” Ms. Sullivan continued. She ended her statement with a wry, knowing smile. “Speaking of which.”

The class collectively held its breath.

“Mr. Bailee, you will be our principal bassist. Mr. Padilla, our principal cello. Ms. Bennett for viola. And finally…” She paused. Whether to add dramatic effect or cause his heart to beat so fast it exploded Phil wasn’t sure. “Our concertmaster will be Mr. Howell. Please see me right now for your individual seating assignments.”

Dan blinked. He had gotten first chair. With a medley from fucking Final Fantasy?!

“Nice going man!” Anthony congratulated, slapping Dan on the back.

“Yeah, yeah you too.” Dan could barely form a coherent sentence. He was still awestruck, and remained that way until he was comfortably seated at Ms. Sullivan’s left hand, fingers tapping against the fabric of his jeans.

Next to him was a tall, pale boy with dark black hair who looked almost as stricken as Dan. But judging from the way his intense blue eyes bore a hole into the metal music stand, it was an angry type of stricken. Dan hadn’t been paying much attention to the other auditions, but he supposed to one he heard faintly in between the whispers exchanged with Anthony, the one he was certain would clinch first chair, must have been this guy. This guy, with his long fingers and sharp jawline and strict posture as he sat on the edge of the chair with a confidence that could only come from years of violin training. This guy, this incredibly fuckable guy, was to be Dan’s second chair.

He was going to have some trouble focusing on the music.

“Hi, I’m Dan.”

Phil’s eyes shifted over to Dan’s open hand, awaiting his to shake. Phil swallowed a sigh of annoyance. “Phil. Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too.” Dan grinned, an easy grin that reminded Phil of the way Z had smiled at him earlier. Phil wondered if Dan would be more at place behind a drum kit.

He certainly appeared that way. His black jeans were ripped at the knees, and his oversize sweater hung low around his hips. His hair was close cropped save for a pile of curls carelessly styled at the top of his head. He even had black studs in his ears, which he fiddled with while he tapped his white sneaker against the linoleum floor. That was another thing. He was constantly fidgeting. Phil thought sitting him at a drum set would’ve helped with that. It also would’ve helped Phil to sit in the spot Dan was. Sure, his performance was beautiful. But with Dan now, in front of him, Phil couldn’t see how he had lost to a guy whose violin was haphazardly sitting in his lap, risking a destructive fall every time Dan’s foot tapped against the ground.

“Alright students.” Ms. Sullivan tapped her baton against her music stand. “Let’s warm up with some scales, shall we?”

At the end of rehearsal, Phil was packing up his violin when he felt a presence hover over him.

“What’re your afternoon classes?” Dan asked cheerfully. Phil stiffened and buckled his case closed.

“Theory, classical composition, and my gen ed class is philosophy.”

“Damn, I’ve got philosophy too,” Dan said. “I’m going to run to the Tyler house dining hall and get something to eat. Want to come with?”

Phil didn’t think he had much of an option. He didn’t want to be rude to his stand partner within the first couple hours of knowing him. “Sure.”

“Cool. My friend Anthony is going to tag along too, is that okay?”

“Uh yeah.”

So Phil found himself walking in between Dan and Anthony, who both looked and acted like brothers, leaving Phil the awkward third wheel.

Dan and Anthony chatted throughout the entire lunch as Phil sullenly stirred his pasta.

“That medley you did was so sick,” Phil heard Anthony say. “I love Final Fantasy.”

“Me too,” Phil spoke up. Finally something he could talk about.

“Oh really? What’s your favorite game?” Anthony asked, with a suspicious tone as if he didn't believe Phil.

“Seven,” Dan and Phil replied in unison.

Dan looked over at Phil and smiled. Phil felt himself smiling back. Maybe Dan wasn’t so bad after all.

Phil changed his mind after rehearsal the next day.

Dan was just so effortlessly good, and it frustrated Phil to no end. Phil had played the opening note of Anderssen’s Concerto in D Major a hair out of tune, and while Sullivan was chiding the bassists on their sloppy bows, Dan leaned over and reminded Phil to press his finger down just a bit harder on that opening. Meanwhile, Dan never screwed up a single note. Phil was certain both he and Sullivan recognized his perfect pitch by the end of the rehearsal.

“Mr. Howell,” Phil heard her mutter as he was packing up his violin. “I very strongly encourage you to audition at the end of this month.”

Phil gritted his teeth. He would need to improve if he wanted that first chair seat, and if he wanted Ms. Sullivan’s blessing.

So he practiced.

He practiced until the indentations in the tips of his fingers were permanent, until his fingers were cramped in the curled position of his bow hold. He played until 10 pm, when PJ went to sleep, and then made his way through the dark house to the practice room across the campus. He survived on coffee and ramen cooked hastily in the nearest microwave. His philosophy grade slipped. His theory homework remained abandoned in his backpack.

But by the end of the second week, none of that mattered.

“The seating arrangements have been altered this week,” Ms. Sullivan announced as her students rosined their bows and tuned quietly. Phil paused and held his breath. “I’d like Mr. Lester and Mr. Howell to switch, please.”

A funny look crossed Dan’s face, like he had smelled something foul. Phil was trying to fight his triumphant smile as the two of them awkwardly swapped seats. Phil managed to catch the furtive glance Anthony sent Dan’s way, and Dan’s furrowed brow in response.

“Can you give us a D, please, Mr. Lester?”

Phil grinned confidently and shouldered his violin.

“It’s bullshit,” Dan growled, slamming the door behind him, earning a startled yelp from Anthony.

“What is? What’s happening?”

“You know what’s happening,” Dan insisted. “Phil Lester got fucking first chair! Weren’t you just telling me how that guy has like, no soul.”

“I mean I guess, but do you really think Sullivan cares about soul?” Anthony sat up, smoothing back the stray curls in his eyes. “She’s older than Mozart.”

“She is not older than Mozart.”

“I’m just saying, she likes the classic stuff and the fact that Lester can hold a brow properly.”

Dan frowned. “I can hold a bow properly.”

Anthony made a high pitched sound of disagreement. “Whatever. Doesn't matter. You need to chill, you can still do well in auditions at the end of the month.”

“I got bumped down. That's not going to look good.”

Anthony raised his eyebrows. “For real, Dan. You've got to fucking chill.”

“Easy for the you to say,” Dan muttered. “You're still principal cello.”

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

Dan didn't sleep much that night.

Or the next night.

By the third night, he had had enough. He pushed aside his duvet, threw on a pair of jeans and a shirt, and grabbed his violin. He closed the door behind him as quietly as possible.

Dan regretted not bringing a jacket as he hurried through the chilly autumn night, clenching his jaw to keep his teeth from chattering. The tips of his fingers were nearly frozen by the time he opened the door to the practice rooms. A quiet, lilting noise filled his ears as soon as he stepped through the threshold. It sounded like the first violin part for one of the pieces they were doing. Dan’s blood ran as cold as it had been outside. He knew exactly who was here.

Dan followed the music to the second floor and down the hallway, his mind racing. This was how Phil Lester had been able to get so ahead of him. He had been practicing all day, all night. Holed up in here, isolating himself.

Two could play at that game.

Dan chose the practice room right next to Phil’s. He turned on the light and pulled out his violin, staring down at his bow hold. Was he doing it wrong?

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and adjusted his fingers after a quick Google search. Everything needed to be perfect.

Dan took a breath and burst into the Allegro they were working on today, playing it as loud and crisp as he could. The mezzo fortes became fortes, and the fortes fortissimos. Dan played and played until the gentle music the room over stopped. Dan felt himself grin and moved onto the next measure, playing until he heard his own door fly open.

“What is your problem?!”

His bow slid off his string, creating an ugly scratching sound. “What do you mean?”

Phil was fuming, the neck of his violin looked just about ready to crack from how tightly he was clutching it. He was wearing glasses that were sliding down his crinkled brow. Dan thought he looked good in them, better than if he were wearing contacts. But he didn’t figure now was a good time to bring that up.

“There are like, twenty practice rooms in this building and you choose the one next to mine! I don’t care how pissed you are that I got concertmaster, just stay out of my fucking space!”

Dan couldn’t help but notice how tired Phil looked, the black rings around his eyes, his face a shade paler than normal. The skin was hanging off his sharp cheekbones, like he hadn’t eaten properly in awhile. Dan frowned, his pettiness erased by Phil’s alarming state.

“Are you okay mate?” Dan asked carefully.

Phil took a step back, as if that was the last thing he expected in response. “What…? I mean, I will be if you leave me the fuck alone and stop acting like a kid!”

“You should get some sleep,” Dan said. “You’ve already got first chair. You deserve a break.”

The anger had been all but erased from Phil’s features. His next words came soft and uncertain from his mouth. “Just… fuck off okay?”

Phil left the room, footsteps echoing through the silent building. Dan stood and started packing up his violin.

Dan scoured the school website the next day in philosophy, searching through rosters until he found Phil’s name and dorm number. When his classes were over, he wandered over to Phil’s building and asked a petite girl with wild hair for directions to his room. She pointed him down the hall.

Dan stood in front of Phil’s door, hesitating for the slightest of moments, before he brought up his fist and knocked. The knob turned almost right away, and the door swung open with some difficulty to reveal a guy with bright green eyes and a saxophone around his neck.

“Can I help you?” he asked.

“Uh yeah, this is Phil Lester’s room, right?”

The guy frowned. “Yeah. He’s not here right now though.”

“When will he be back?”

“Honestly?” He sighed, some of the tension in his shoulders released. “Probably not anytime soon. I don’t even think he came back to the building yesterday. You’ll have better luck in the practice rooms.”

“Thanks.”

“Why do you ask?” the saxophonist asked suspiciously. “Are you guys friends?”

“I’m worried about him, that’s all,” Dan said. “He’s been pushing himself too hard, I can tell.”

“This is a music Academy,” he pointed out. “That’s kind of the only option.”

“Still,” Dan replied. “There’s still a line.”

He stuck out his hand. “PJ Liguori.”

Dan shook. “Dan Howell.”

“Give me your number so I can text if Phil comes back.”

“Awesome, thanks.”

Dan took PJ’s phone and put in his contact information. They parted ways with a nod, and Dan’s head swirled with even more worry than it had before he had arrived.

Of course, he didn’t know why he was concerned. Phil had stolen his position after all. Phil running himself into the ground so ferociously that he could barely keep his eyes open for an entire piece benefitted Dan. But it also made him sick to his stomach. Did Phil really deserve to nearly kill himself over a petty dispute in orchestra? Did it matter that much?

Was the fact that Dan had never received a proper violin lesson in his life making him think this way? Had the competition been injected into Phil’s fingers by whatever harsh teachings he had to survive to get here?

Dan didn’t know. But he did know that this wasn’t worth it. He had to help Phil.

He couldn’t have picked a worse time than the week before Orchestra A auditions.

“Hey,” Dan called, jogging up to Phil after class after he had bolted out the door as soon as he had been dismissed. “Are you going to lunch?”

“No.”

“Are you going to eat anything?”

Phil was caught off guard again. “I don’t know. I mean, yes. Why do you care?”

“Come on, we’re getting lunch.” Dan grabbed Phil’s wrist, shooting him a cocky grin.

“No, I can’t…”

“Come on.”

Phil blinked. The fight melted from his body. “Fine.”

Dan sat across from Phil minutes later, watching him scarf down the bland dining hall food like it was his first meal in weeks. It probably was.

“Feel better?” Dan asked. Phil looked up to meet his eyes before glancing back down at his food.

“I guess. I actually got kind of sick of ramen.”

Dan snickered. “You really should eat some real food every now and again.”

“No time,” Phil replied. “Auditions are next week.”

“I’m pretty sure you know every violin piece perfectly.”

Phil stopped and set down his fork. “Not everyone is a naturally gifted musical genius like you, Dan. Some people have to work, and keep working, if they want to get better.”

“I’m no musical genius.”

Phil scoffed. “Don’t humble yourself. You’ve got perfect pitch. You can memorize music like that. Every note you play you might as well be singing you’re… amazing.” The lightest pink was tinting Phil’s cheeks. He turned back to his food.

“Thanks.”

The next day, Dan was sure to drag Phil to lunch with him again. And call PJ at night, to make sure Phil was in his bed, sleeping. The routine continued, until the day before the auditions.

Dan noticed that the vibrancy had returned to Phil’s skin as he walked into Dan’s dorm. Anthony was away, practicing out by himself, so Dan was in his room working on his his audition. Strewn across his bed were sheets for a Legend of Zelda medley he had arranged himself, sheets he had been staring at for days and had memorized within the first hours of making them.

“Shouldn’t you be practicing?” Dan asked Phil teasingly. The other man wasn’t even carrying his violin, and it might’ve been his imagination, but Dan thought that without the weight of the instrument, Phil stood up straighter and easier.

“Thought I would take a break.” Phil pointed at an empty spot on Dan’s bed. “Can I sit?”

“Sure.” Dan shuffled his papers out of the way and sat down next to Phil. “Are you nervous?”

“I should be,” Phil decided. “But instead I feel disturbingly calm. Like my entire life doesn’t rest on whether or not I make it into this orchestra.”

“There’s always next month.”

“Always next month.”

The two of them paused, staring out Dan’s windows and over the campus.

“I wanted to thank you,” Phil said finally.

“For what?”

Phil laughed. “You pretty much saved my life. Who knows where I’d be if I continued like that?”

“Well, you’re welcome.”

“I’m serious.” Phil’s voice had lowered. His hand had snaked closer to Dan’s until their fingers were overlapping. “Thank you.”

Dan didn’t know what to say next. Luckily, he didn’t have to say anything.

Phil had leaned forward and pressed their lips together. Dan’s eyes had fluttered closed, his hand properly fitting into Phil’s. Phil had made a soft, breathy noise that was better than any music that came out of his violin.

The next day, Dan and Phil arrived for their audition times. They played their hearts out for the conductor of Chamber Orchestra A, each thinking of nothing but the notes and the taste of the other’s lips.

Monday of the next week, the conductor entered the room to announce who he would be taking on this month.

“Anthony Padilla, welcome to Chamber Orchestra A.”

#djsjsjsj i was initially going to have dnp both make it #but then i was like what about anthony #and eventually i said FUCK IT let's piss everyone off #lmao #anyway long time no see huh #i think this is the first fic on this blog maybe>#*?#hope y'all like it #i think i like it #phanfiction #phanfic #phan angst #phan au #musician!dan #musician!phil #phan #franfic

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mysme-hcs · 7 years

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What would love be like with each character? Please include my dearest trio and if you can... Rika. I want to know what love with each character feels like on a Sunday morning and after a fight, you know these characters so well I hope it made sense! (do I have to be anon?)

This is my longest headcanon ever (4k words) so it’s going under the cut. I added everyone so hopefully it lives up to your expectations, but heavy spoilers! And no, you don’t have to be anon!

Rika▪before even thinking about starting a relationship/life with you, Rika wants to try to make things right with everyone she’s hurt first▪she knows there’s nothing she can do to help make things right with Saeran or Saeyoung, but she tries to convince V to get the eye surgery and offers to pay for it all herself▪she even apologizes to Jumin for putting him in uncomfortable situations with hinting at a relationship between the two of them▪when you first move in with each other and buy a house, she insists you start off with a clean slate▪the house you’ve bought has a rotting smell coming from inside the walls, torn up flooring, and is just generally trashed but she’s determined to turn it into a home▪she works as an interior designer so not only is she ready for the challenge, she’s tired of redoing houses for people when you both are living in her apartment, aka a literal bomb & alarm infested apartment▪seriously, you pull a drawer too hard and then you’ve gotta explain to Seven why the alarm is ringing at 2 am and why you wanted cereal at 2 am▪so buying and decorating a house is kind of her way of taking care of you!▪you honestly can’t deny her when she gets determined about something involving you tbh▪Rika is a force, obviously don’t cross her when she wants something▪if she wants the walls neon green she’s gonna get it▪Rika is extremely talented with her job, you know the end result is going to be fantastic▪also she’s neat, very neat; everything has to be absolutely perfect for the two of you▪all of the silverware and dishes are brand new, the furniture…everything is almost too perfect but it’s homey!▪she takes you to every thrift store to find things you two can remodel for the house but money isn’t an issue▪she ADORES those cute Pinterest DIYs▪when you get around to working on the DIYs, hers look straight out of a magazine▪yours…aren’t as good.▪instead of getting mad though, Rika just smiles and shows you how to fix your mistakes. She’s a little forward with telling you it doesn’t look great but she doesn’t mean any harm by it▪she’s telling you this so you can pay better attention & learn from your mistake▪love with Rika is very straightforward. She’s blunt in stating her feelings, isn’t afraid to take charge, but she really loves you▪she likes to bake cookies & apple tart with you and it’s a Sunday tradition to sit around the house and watch movies, Zen’s musicals included, while you both cuddle▪you two volunteer a lot and the RFA parties?▪they’re a blast!▪with two party coordinators together it’s so well organized and fun for everyone▪not to mention how much money you all raise???▪your relationship blossoms into something amazing, something she didn’t come close to experiencing with V▪Not everything is perfect though, she has breakdowns often▪sometimes she accidentally tries to hurt you, but she works hard to overcome it▪even if she has to see a therapist daily, she’ll do anything▪you stuck by her side when she didn’t deserve it, she could at least try to change for the better▪after a fight she’s terrified you’re going to leave her alone but you’re there for her no matter what▪you bring her anything that’ll make her smile again▪she really just needs validation and promise that everything will be okay someday▪and with some work and trust, it will

Jaehee▪this woman is incredibly strong and underappreciated▪she’s experienced every negative emotions you can think of, and somehow still manages to stay strong and keep her head up▪she’s mostly been extremely unhappy in her life, though▪her parents died when she was young and she wasn’t wanted by her aunt, who criticized everything she did▪anything perfect was looked down on because it made her cousin look bad, but anything too sloppy and she’d be told she couldn’t do anything right▪that’s why Jaehee is so obsessed with her work being done correctly, and why she likes you so much▪instead of treating her like a work machine, you help build her up when she needs it and just support her in general▪she realizes she loves you on Valentines Day but didn’t say anything▪mostly you both were having a great time with each other watching movies and playing board games, which she didn’t want to ruin▪if her confession went wrong, it’d ruin everything▪if you left her, I strongly believe it’d absolutely destroy her▪her passion in coffee? Just the smell makes her want to vomit▪the hair you encouraged her to grow out? Cut short.▪her happiness? …..gone. She goes back to work under Jumin and works herself almost three times as hard▪unbeknownst to her, you were going through the exact same thing▪So because Jaehee worked under Jumin, she had to be cautious about the company and try to think ahead to prevent bad publicity▪she does the same with you, thinking ahead in your relationship that is!▪Jaehee heavily considers everything: what’d happen if you said no, what’d happen to the café and the RFA…▪she sets up a time and a date to confess▪finally the day comes and she buys you coffee while you both walk around a botanic garden▪it’s peaceful and quiet, plus the scenery sets a gorgeous backdrop for everything▪she kept everything a secret, but she did ask Zen how he calms his nerves and to talk her through a big conversation with MC which is cute as heck my dudes▪she sits you down on a bench and just…spills everything▪when she gets to the actual confession + asking you to be her girlfriend, she trips up on her words and accidentally stutters▪it’s so precious▪the smile on her face is priceless afterwards though▪like▪the sun can literally go home now because we have Jaehee’s smile to light up the world bye▪she’s in such a daze for the next week▪nothing can phase her because she’s so excited▪she tries to initiate so much physical contact in that week, cuddles, cheek kisses, hand holding ALL OF IT▪it’s adorable▪if you guys fight, it’s probably going to be over something small that has been blown out of proportion▪you’ll both calm down and then talk over things, eventually agreeing on what would be best for you▪Since he knew her the best, Jumin’s advice is usually the one you follow out of the entire RFA▪on lazy Sundays you two end up trying something new, whether it be gardening, putting together puzzles, or taking walks▪she loves this because during the two years she worked for Jumin, she barely had time to even eat▪so now she has all of this free time to spend with you!!!▪she loves taking walks though because it gives you time to talk and just relax while being outside▪she just loves you so much

Yoosung:▪canon that he listens to everything you have to say, no matter how small, and tries hard to improve himself as a whole so he’ll be a better man for you▪there is no judgment with Yoosung and he’s 101% willing to help you with all of the housework & anything that needs done▪love with Yoosung is a lot like this▪he’s loving, he never has any impure intentions towards you, and he’d do anything to see you happy and healthy▪he literally risked his life for you so you’d be safe???▪he listens to EVERYTHING the Men of Monogamy group tells him about love▪and tbh he probably calls his mom everything too▪Yoosung keeps detailed notes of all your dates, from what the date consisted of to what you wore▪he tries to prevent conflict but is very quick to fix things if you do fight▪just having you beside him was enough to make him want to become better and more hardworking▪so he studies for another year, quitting LOLOL and renting an apartment for both of you▪sometimes you’re in awe of how much he’s able to juggle at one time but he does it flawlessly▪a lazy Sunday would include laying together on his couch, cuddling and playing video games together and trying to learn how to cook▪frequent movie dates which consist of throwing popcorn up in the air and trying to catch it in your mouth during the previews it’s gotten you both kicked out of the theater more than once and then walking around town together discussing the movie and holding hands▪when he proposes to you it’s shortly after he graduates college bc he just can’t wait to start a shared life▪you both are decorating the waiting room in his new clinic when he asks you to both take a break▪he gives you the cheesiest speech you’ve ever heard in your life, but it’s definitely written by him his mom co-wrote and edited it though, thx Mrs. Kim▪speaking of her, he took so much more advice from his mom just to make sure everything was perfect▪as for the ring! He took Jaehee and V along with him to pick it out▪but Jaehee knew what would be in his price range, and V had experience with engagement rings▪Jaehee picked the more simple ones, V picked the prettiest ones (I mean, he’s a photographer so he knows beauty) so the two of them combined…▪Yoosung had the final say though▪your engagement ring will be your wedding ring too, but it’s absolutely, incredibly gorgeous▪he clearly put so much effort into everything, it’s so adorable▪finally he gets to officially spend the rest of his life with you!▪Lisa is your child for the first two years, but when you finally have a child it’s like his dreams have all come true▪Yoosung is an incredible boyfriend and husband. He’s honest, dependable, and will always be your best friend through anything and everything

Jumin▪canon that everything is really rushed bc he never had a relationship so now he wants everything all at once▪your wedding was so crowded that even the RFA didn’t get a single word to you both in but it was beautiful and easily the best day of your life▪V’s wedding gift to you two was the eye surgery and his promise to be the photographer you know those photos are amazinggg▪but enough about the wedding, Jumin promised you that anything you have will always be the best and he’ll never force you into anything▪he still stands by that▪if he feels there’s a fight coming, he’ll immediately step away and let both parties cool off▪it’s just part of being a businessman tbh, he knows when a fight is coming and how to resolve things▪once you’re both calm and collected, then you can talk it out▪if you come to him when you’re angry, he’ll just refuse to speak to you▪again, he’s a businessman so he’ll get straight to the point and address whatever the root cause is and fix it▪but he’s very against couple’s therapy and won’t partake in it no matter what▪he’s against it because he’s sure you two can figure everything out by yourselves, and that there’s no use involving other people in your relationship. He’s also afraid of the media somehow getting ahold of the information and would twist it against you▪he can’t risk losing you so sometimes he’d be too possessive, which also sparks some fights▪he’ll feel guilty about that later because you mean everything to him and hurting you is never his intention▪lazy Sundays mostly consist of cuddling and he’ll make you his signature strawberry pancakes▪walks around his garden, reading, he loves anything domestic that resembles a normal relationship▪he just loves being in your company though, you could be sitting across the room from each other in silence and he’d still like it▪on Saturday nights he likes to drink wine with you and V▪the three of you are so close, anyone looking in would never be able to guess that you didn’t know them your entire life▪he reads to you every night before bed and likes it when you’re curled up with your head over his heart▪that way he can hold you close and stroke your hair▪even though it could be taken the wrong way, he buys you gifts very very frequently▪it’s just because he likes imagining how happy you’ll be with each thing & the smile on your face▪everything reminds him of you and he would literally hand you the world if he could

Zen▪Zen grew up with no support▪his mother forcefully cut his hair and picked him up immediately after school so he couldn’t play guitar, something he loved▪it was such a toxic home that he ran away when he was in middle school▪and yeah, he’s not proud of his past but promises that regardless of your past it’s only important where you are now (canon)▪he’s proud of how far he’s come with acting and making it on his own▪he jokes about The Beast™ but it’s a real thing, he’s terrified you’ll run away if he shows you what he really wants or the ugly parts of him▪being around you makes him nervous sometimes but at the same time, it’s like a breath of fresh air being around someone who cares so much for him▪Zen’s super laid back about things but is worried about you being in the spotlight because his fans and haters can sometimes get too….intense with even him▪Zen is also very cautious of the roles he picks up from now on▪he wouldn’t take on any roles that could be seen as a bad influence to your future children *wink wink* or any that make you uncomfortable▪some of the musicals he’s been in have been very romantic or very sexy so he wants to make sure you’re okay with him playing those parts first!▪he values your opinion so so much but he can also sometimes get a little hot-headed when it comes to you and your safety *cough cough* remember Jumin’s route?▪and that’s because he’s never been close to marriage but when he’s with you, he wants to marry you right on the spot▪he put your engagement off for the longest time, sure his family would come around some day, but it never happens▪he didn’t want to accept it for the longest time, but after Valentines Day he realizes that his family isn’t there but you are▪keeping your relationship wasn’t honest with the media and his fans, and it was setting you both back!!▪you couldn’t even be seen together in public, let alone go on dates or have it be known that you live together▪buuut taking care of you is his first priority so if his agency didn’t like it, he could find dozens of others▪Zen dispels those rumors with Jocelyn in an interview and promises that your relationship with him is still serious and ongoing▪and within another week, you both are engaged▪honestly the proposal was kind of spontaneous▪Zen loves the idea of having a family and kids if you can’t tell▪he wants to have six of them (but he’ll settle for two, y'know)▪the first year you’re together is magical!!▪he wants so badly to take you around town and show you his favorite spots and favorite things, and he’s eager to learn more about you & your likes▪he’s extremely considerate as well, always considering your feelings and never jumping into anything without talking it over▪a relationship with Zen would also be laid back in all the best ways▪he makes everything seem so…right and comfortable

V▪Jihyun is scarred really badly from Rika▪he has so many nasty secrets just from Mint Eye and other things he’s kept hidden▪so at first he doesn’t want to be in a relationship because of this but you promise to be there for him and respect his ways▪you even offer to help shoulder some of the burden▪and…he respects you so much for it▪he could never let you but he appreciates your passion and love for him▪he’s also hesitant to go to you after a fight he’s caused▪he’s always going to find a way to make you/him believe that everything was his fault because he genuinely believes it▪after a fight you have to go to him, and your heart breaks every time you see him crying▪afterwards you just do whatever is most comfortable for the two of you▪V enjoys jigsaw puzzles and they’re a good way to relax together and build teamwork, even if he hasn’t had the surgery he likes it when you help him put the pieces into place and such▪just the warm touch of your hand is enough to remind him that you’re there for him▪he loves it when you read him poetry▪he’s an artist so of course he appreciates poetry so much!▪something about the deep meanings behind the words and how you emotionally connect to them…he adores it▪he also likes putting music on and dancing with you▪he hides things from you in order to protect you, which sometimes gets annoying but he has good intentions▪he’d do anything for you and would love you no matter what you’ve done or been through (remember that speech he gave Rika?)▪V would do anything for you and anything you do for him makes him extremely happy▪whether it’s flattening a stray hair out of place or helping him around, he falls deeper in love with you▪you can’t ever out-compliment him▪being with V is so natural▪he’s rich but he saves presents and extravagant things for more special occasions so he doesn’t overwhelm you▪he just cares so much for you▪the eye surgery is a really touchy subject because it’s an injury he’s subjected himself to deal with but getting his vision fixed would make him realize how things can change for the better▪he doesn’t have to be abused or manipulated by Rika anymore▪he can have a happy relationship and life, and he can do it with you

Vanderwood ▪Vanderwood says he doesn’t see the point in anything related to family because of his job, so it’ll take a long time of knowing each other to start a relationship▪he’s terrified something would happen to you, so if he starts having feelings for you he’ll push you away just like Seven▪you’ll probably be unsure of his feelings for a while since he isn’t very open, but he’ll show you through small little things▪he claims he doesn’t want children but down the road in your relationship an unplanned pregnancy brings him more joy than he’d thought▪he’s aware that you’re not perfect and neither is he▪if you make any mistake he’s quick to call you out but he’ll help you through it▪he really does give you self defense lessons and buys you a taser so you can take care of yourself and your daughter▪honestly not too big of a family man but he adores you both, just wishes things were a little different with his job and life▪you two deserve someone with a family, not a grumpy secret agent who has trouble with his emotions▪sometimes he’ll pull away though so just give him space▪fights are awful between you two▪after a particularly rough one he’ll be the one to come to you, half-drunk and nearly in hysterics▪neither one of you will probably talk because you know what went wrong and what you can do better next time▪so he pulls you against you and lays there until you both fall asleep▪the next day will be super lazy, you’re both exhausted from the emotional outpour▪so you’ll find a ridiculously stupid TV show to binge and spend the rest of the day together▪love with Vanderwood isn’t sweet kisses and heartfelt hugs, sometimes its listening to him lecturing you and denying his feelings but it’s always coming back to each other no matter what happens▪there won’t be a single day where you fall out of love with him and vice versa

Saeyoung ▪asking you to call him Saeyoung was a massive deal to him!▪he confessed that none of his past identities were real and “Saeyoung” was pushed away because of his past▪he wants nothing more than to quit his agency and start a life with you and Saeran but that’s not possible just yet ▪first you actually have to find Saeran▪and when you do, Saeran still has a hard time with trusting Saeyoung and possibly suffers heavy withdrawals from the potent drugs he recieved at Mint Eye▪either way, Saeran puts a heavy strain on your relationship for a while until he gets better▪but once he does, Saeyoung finally buckles down and proposes▪Saeran claims it’s because Saeyoung is scared that if he waits too long then someone might snatch you up▪on lazy Sundays he just likes to hang around the house or have a movie day with you and Saeran▪a movie day is the only activity he’ll admit he enjoys▪so you three make a giant palette on the floor and make ice cream sundaes▪it’s quiet and peaceful, sometimes Saeran and Saeyoung both fall asleep on you during the movie▪Saeyoung passes his Star Wars & Harry Potter obsessions down to Saeran and his childrenslightly unrelated but imagine Saeran and Saeyoung in Hogwarts robes asdfjklajdkal that is all▪Which, you don’t have children for several years but when you do, your sons and daughter grow up in the best household imaginable▪love with Saeyoung is patient and caring▪he always puts you first and having to wait on your marriage strengthens your relationship in the best ways▪he’s still paranoid over his agency and Mint Eye but will calm down over time once he realizes you’re with him every step of the way

Saeran▪Saeran is extremely broken and unstable▪he was abused and sick from a really young age, and then taken to Mint Eye where he was not only tortured, but brainwashed▪again, he possibly has withdrawals from the potent drugs he recieved at Mint Eye???▪as soon as he gets better, he wants to quit smoking…it makes him feel dirty inside after everything that’s happened▪so he has a lot to go through still, and even though it takes him a really long time to be able to trust you and Saeyoung, he needs the both of you▪when he first realizes his feelings for you, he tries to ignore them at first ▪he’s not mean to you or pushes you away, he just…distances himself from you thinking the feelings would go away eventually but they never do▪it’s a bit obvious sometimes that he likes you, but you like him back so it’s not a big deal▪once you think Saeran would be okay to handle a relationship, Saeyoung helps you confess▪your relationship is tentative at first▪you want him to be comfortable, and he doesn’t want to hurt you somehow▪everything just takes it’s time and after a couple years of being together, he asks you to marry him▪Saeran isn’t the type of person to make a huge deal out of it, he most likely just asks you (which you think is random, but he’s been gathering the courage to ask you for over a week)▪and your wedding is very small▪if you have any children at all, he’s terrified▪it’s a small human being with half of his genetics?▪there is a chance the child may turn out sickly like Saeran was as a child, so if it does then it gets so much care & love▪he’s the worst when it comes to your child wanting sweets bc he does too▪but regardless, he’s grateful to you and Saeyoung for saving him▪he’s grateful to Saeyoung for teaching him that family & the world doesn’t have to be cruel▪but he’s grateful that you taught him how to be gentle and kind, that you stayed and cared for him, and that you love him▪he would never ever break that trust or hurt you

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