#comforting our bf

[mintedaisies]

coming to the realization that im insanely cagey about sex & intimacy and its so fucking hard to even ATTEMPT to break out of it without professional help and even that is out of the question until at least november

#it SUCKS SO BAD #i dont like talking about it. at all. #my bf was talking to me about how his therapist recommended exposure therapy with touch and then he just. #held and rubbed my knee while touching our foreheads together #and it conjured this INSANE feeling of yearning and grief inside my chest #its so hard realizing just how much your trauma has affected you #i had to pull into a parking lot and cry about it for literally 45 minutes earlier #i have so many thoughts #but i want to feel comfortable with intimacy again #and not absolutely terrified of it #where the mint grows

[beastking-golion]

Finished my run of Mortum’s romance and.

#full spoilers in these tags here my guys #fhr #fallen hero retribution #fhr spoilers #fallen hero retribution spoilers #okay so 1. love this gal she’s so awesome and knowing she vented to her friend about our dumbass decisions makes me weirdly happy #you are so girlboss mortum #anyways 2. shes so lovey dovey and the fact she takes the time to keep you comfortable first is sooooo ❤️ #her specifically getting cozy with you only after establishing you’re comfortable is so sweet of her #dont ‘bar is on the floor’ me btw because I have another piece to that in why it makes me so emotional #gonna talk about dubious consent here for a second so BIG warning okie? okie. #3. the scene after you reveal yourself as a regene to her and she asks why you had sex with her and you explain how you do things- #for humans because that’s what you were built to do meaning you acted for her desires not your own meaning she ‘pushed’ you into doing it #that was so devastating and I mean specifically for her as someone who clearly values consent a shit ton #yes you may have liked it but you did it cause you thought it would make her happy not because you wanted it like oh my god that hurts #she prolly understands regenes at least to some sort of degree shes a smart well connected woman so learning your bf is actually a regene- #has gotta have so many cogs and questions and worries shooting through her mind #you were made to serve humans you were controlled and abused by doctors like her you clearly fear her to some aspect #its heart breaking because of how much love she shows you and how much love she just has in general even as a villain #sorry yall I just can’t stop thinking about that scene like that had to have been so harrowing for her #it’s not your fault mortum you literally couldn’t have known even if you tried because our ass is so secretive #but it felt like it left off on a hopeful note #you both understand things so deeply about each other now and you can rebuild #start over and try again in a better safer way #one where you’re honest with her #AAWASG TH GFHFHFNGN it was really good it was so good #love that gal mortum so much #built out of love and vinegar she’s so awesome sauce #and with that I’ve played all the fhr2 romances #I can’t decide which romance is my favorite but I know which is my least (and it’s not my bbg mortum love ya)

[black-beacon]

"ha ha they won't sleep well together cause Stede is a starfish in bed"

Bold of you to assume that Stede won't just starfish on top of Ed and become his boyfriend weighted blanket, causing them both to have the best night of sleep they've ever had.

#speaking as a starfish sleeper who slept SO comfortably with my bf: theyll work #ive just been seeing a lot of this and it makes me sad #i know its supposed to be funny but ehh #our flag means death #blackbonnet

[peapod20001]

I like to think that if my tumblr pals came to my house, they’d have a good time

#random post #I don’t mean that as in ‘yea woo let’s party and get fucked up’ like no lol #I just mean. our house is a place where people get along #there’s no expectations here. wanna sit and talk? we can hang out and talk about whatever #wanna play a game? chances are a few other people do to #need to get away for a bit and maybe take a nap? we’ve got plenty of beds take your pick. we’ll make sure no one bothers you #hungry or thirsty? help yourself don’t be shy. we can always get more #like we had ppl over on Saturday and it was so FUN like ppl would talk all together and then different conversations would split off of that #we would go outside then back in. we had food and some ppl had alcohol #we were laughing SO hard about funny shit (like discovering that my sisters bf worked on the gas meter at grandpas but didn’t SAY ANYTHING #ABOUT IT LMFAO) my cousin brought his gf to meet everyone and she just fit in perfectly and so obviously had an obsession for animals #her and my sister were like sudden bffs it was hilarious. my brother and younger cousin ate at 2:40 and slept upstairs till 6:00 #and all we did was turn of the light and put on a fan for em lol. crack up at how comfortable they were #me and my lil sister were walking up and down the driveway talking and looking at the stars. the nap duo were pointing out constellations #when most everyone left it was my household and my sister and her bf. she played uno flip and incoherent with me (usually no one does lol) #and we laughed very hard at all of the adult cards. one of the hints she gave for sidechicks was ‘sad used to have a lot of these’ and #I immediately got it. it was fun. we blasted music from the 2000’s and ate bread #I slept for 11 hours that night lmao and I was tired the next day but I wouldn’t have changed it. I like them lots #it’s days like that that make me think I’m more extroverted than introverted. just because I don’t always know what to say doesn’t mean #I don’t like to talk yn? anyways I’m writing a novel in the tags but I don’t care <3 I just love us and I wish #other people were able to have love and fun times often #I hope this doesn’t sound like me bragging about my home life. trust me I know it’s not some shining light in the darkness or whatever #but it’s something. and I don’t mind sharing my love with other people

[tahdashi]

:0!!!!

#so as you guys may know #my boyfriend and i are a year into our relationship and it’s been going well #with some bumps in the road of course #and as much as i always dreamt of the most extravagant love #the love he shows me in his own ways is so precious #he’s just a Guy yk? not into all the romantic stuff like calling me pet names or pda #but today he called me a pet name he’s never really used before #and in a non-sarcastic annoying way #and i got butterflies again #which is insane bc i thought we were in this period of comfort and stagnancy #but that lil word made me so unbelievably!?! flustered like i was reminded of how i felt when i first met him #idk it just made me really happy #bc i usually do question a lot of things like if he finds me exciting n whatnot #it was just nice #:( #sayu speaks #sayu’s other bf <3 #delete later

[stinkrascal]

all the shit i read on reddit about people living with roommates makes me so relieved that me and bf dont have any roommates because if i had to share my living space with someone who isnt my partner id actually die

#i just saw a reddit post where op left raw chicken in the sink for two days #because their roommates didnt do their dishes soon enough #RAW CHICKEN??? mf throw it away in the garbage #they kept saying they didnt toss it in the trash bc it would be too stinky #but apparently being exposed in the sink isnt too stinky?? girl what #theres this crazy thing called walking outside and throwing the trash in the trashcan outside #roommates sound so annoying. id have to share the living room and i wouldnt be able to freely walk around naked like tf? no #ny best friend who lives in colorado said he wants me and bf and him and our other friend to all get a house together to live in #and i love my colorado best friend but omfg i’m so not doing that #firstly all my friends are guys except me so idk that would be weird. i couldnt wear my robe around them it’s too revealing for my comfort #secondly not to be tmi but umm?? i don’t want them to hear me and my bf fuck LMAO that’s just embarrassing #thirdly im ngl me and my bf are slobs haha. not super badly but we slack on dishes a lot #i get them done before its too gross/smelly but our threshold for how cleanly the house needs to be is even #meanwhile colorado bestie is a clean freak and i just couldn’t 😭 LIKE IDK I LOVE PRIVACY #i love my friends i just can’t imagine living with people that aren’t my bf #me and bf have lived together since we were 17 so we’re very used to our schedules. having to get used to another’s just sounds bad

[aliennooboo]

hmm

#nonsims #been thinking of the support group that starts this sunday #in a way my brains are all 'you don't need to go if it makes you uncomfortable!!! you can just stay home!!! that would be sooo comfy!!!' #but at the same time i recognize that stepping out of my comfort zone might be very good in this particular case #not that i haven't been out of my comfort zone all my life lol #i just know that i need Something that feels real and important in my life #i need to build myself some kind of a life where i will still have things to live for if/when i lose the most important people in my life #and you know what. i counted the social things i've done independently as an adult #like sure my bf's friends visit us a few times a year #but for me those visits are 100% tied to my bf and i would never see those people without him cos they're HIS friends #i do always refer to them as our friends but the reality is that i would never hear from them again if me and the bf split up #so i counted the stuff i've done independently (school or work or hanging out with mom/grandma/bf not included) #i've had dinner with my coworkers TWICE (i didn't want to go but i didn't dare stand out by not going) #i've been to a bar with my work partner ONCE (after one of those dinners) #i see my BFF 2-3 times PER YEAR #that's it. that's my independent social life for AT LEAST the last 12 years #so you know if i were to go to the support group and attend all 11 meetings... #that would be like the biggest social thing for me in my whole adult life #and it's so funny cos it's an AUTISM support group!!! my biggest social thing would be an autism support group!!! #so i'm trying to get into this mindset that i'll go at least this first time to see what it's like

[chaotictomtom]

the only thing making me go 👀 on mac products is procreate 😵‍💫 but paying like 300€ to. simply draw on a tablet that is as big or even smaller than my xp pen tablet just because there's a screen.....nuh huh.

#ppl keeps going procreate is so great and it's free omggg!!! yeah. yeah it's free but. the hardware my guy. #won't get a ipad JUST to draw like i know i won't use it for anything elese #even the second hand old ones are like over 200€ </333 how are you ppl getting these #i wiiiish i could get procreate on a cheap android tablet </3333 cos i do have a problem of i can't physically draw if anyone's wathcing #and bf's desk is right next to mine we can see whatever the other is doing #so having a tablet and being able to draw comfortably in my chair or on the bed could be so nice #i miss drawing on digital </33333 #i barely draw during the day time cos i have this deep rooted problem of having to hide whatever im draiwng i hate it #idk why cos i feel safe around bf i never felt safer in my entire life #but i still have. problems. wahhhh #i wish our flat was bigger or that we could move stuff around augh

[dordey]

,

#i found a documentary on the circumstances / stories behind australia's i think most iconic queer movie #& not even 10 mins into it & mmm it's already emotional #i'm having so many thoughts & #literally just recently talked w my bf about one of the Pretty Prominent themes in the movie #& the doc talks about the real life experience of a sydney drag queen that story was based on & mm #always & Again it is so comforting to know that others in our community have gone through the same / similar things #& it being my city & my community & my parents' & their loved ones' experiences as well #idk just. Emotional #do not vouch for the movie & it Is rife with problems #but it was huge & still is #& the doc is showing a lot of footage & has interviews that important i think to sydney's history etc etc #just a lot of Thoughts & caveats & more thoughts #& a reminder to be more grateful that i can be out & love my partners openly #& that while the law has never been on our side #there are a lot more people that are than there have ever been before etc #*

[bpdamn]

lmao i can’t believe i went from NEVER (!!!) facetiming or calling people to having someone who i’m comfortable enough around to even cry while facetiming

#i had an episode while face timing my bf :’) #we facetime daily since i’m in quarantine ​rn and we’ve been talking about everything’s that’s been going on and i just #started bawling my eyes out ._. #BUT he did something adorable #he started talking about OUR FUTURE #we really want to move to japan (even if it’s just for a year or so) #so he tried to calm me down by talking about nice things like learning japanese together and all the new experiences we’ll make together #it worked heh #anyways i’m shocked that this happened cause i don’t even feel comfortable enough to cry around people in person #personal

[girlwithfish]

might get a couch soon...

#everyone in reviews says it is not that comfortable but i dont think my bf nd i will rly be using it that much #cuz the tv is in our bedroom so its rly just for guests the rare times when we do have guests #like a few weeks ago my bfs friend came over and we just sat on 2 folding chairs and my bf sat on his bass amp in thel iving room Lol #its just a basic cheap couch but it looks nice so im excited #ill invest in like a quality comfy living room couch when im like. 25

[landofgay]

like yeah okay depending on which apartment his sister wants/needs/can afford (cause the bigger apartment is upstairs and she's disabled and probably doesn't wanna do stairs every day, but if her and her bf are moving in Together they'll need the bigger one cause they need two bedrooms - it's Complicated :D ) we'll either be in a tiny apartment or a slightly less tiny apartment, but either way we get to choose the LAYOUT which is HUGE. we won't have a teeny cramped kitchen his mom is making sure we have maximum counter space, and I'm already explaining to him how the layout of furniture is Everything in a tiny space, and we'll have 2 bathrooms which is very important and u wouldn't get that in an apartment that small anywhere else heheh

#but we'll probably get the bigger one cause as i said. its complicated with his sister and her bf. and she almost certainly doesn't want to #do stairs every day. and also her and her bf arent good with money and probably cant afford to pay for the bigger space every month #cause say the apartments are like 60/40. so 60% vs 40% of the mortgage. plus utilities. #and shes on disability and her bf wastes his money 🥴 vs me and my bf both have steady well paying jobs #so it just feels likely that we'd have the bigger one. aka 2br 2bath !!!!! #we can have a lil gaming room 😭❤️❤️❤️❤️ #and i told him the number 1 thing i want for our place is a NICE couch. one thats Cozy Comfy and actually fits our giant long asses #we are Tall People. i want a Comfortable Couch #thats the only thing i care about and i am willing to spend a lot on a new couch cause i want one that doesnt feel Dirty LMAO #itll be so nice tho!!!!! #i guess theres always those like. couch chaie things that pull out and have the p #leg rest things. the lazy boy chairs. but they have a divider in the middle maybe i wanna snuggle up to my guy 😭❤️❤️❤️ #anyways. gaming room too. he wants to get me a gaming pc setup heheheheh so cute #and as i keep reminding him. we wont have to keep our entire lives inside our bedroom. its Our Place. #we can keep stuff in the living room. we can USE THE LIVING ROOM #its OURS!!!!! #it will be once its built anyways #goddddd. gimme gimme gimme our own place plsplsplspls #😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[outahell]

tell me to stop watching the commonwealth games bc it’s making me sad .    lived in b’ham for 29 years and i’m all the way up in scotland now after moving in march .   great timing for the games shfjdk

#⌜ / 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐅 𝐏𝐔𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐒 › ooc #they're running through the city rn and i'm just i kNOW THAT ROAD #i adore it up here but i miss being able to hop on a bus or walk somewhere #the closest shop to me now is a 3 hour walk bc i can't drive :') #i'm perm stuck in the house unless someone goes out and i go with or i have to go to the doctors #i love living away from noise and people my anxiety was AWFUL and i could never sleep and kjdfhgdfg #the only thing i miss are the memories and being able to hop on a bus and be in the middle of the city in 15 mins #and being a 20 min drive away from the nec for crufts #now i need to plan a plane journey or drive overnight or get a long ass train to get there :(((( #the bf is visiting family there in 3 weeks but i'm not well enough to travel that long again rn #and he's staying at his mum's and i don't feel comfortable staying at someone's house while i'm still unwell bc i'm self conscious :((( #tbd #i legit just burst out crying when the finish line of this race was at colmore row where i used to get off the bus to go shopping #and where i met the bf for our first date jfdhgkjdf

[stinkrascal]

TODAY IS CAT DAY!!! in a few hours me and bf will be the parents to a lovely furry little dude and i am beyond excited 🥺

#i’ve been waiting for this day all week omg #i literally woke up at 7am i was so excited lol. i never wake that early #tbf i went to bed immediately after bf’s work event last night. i was so drunk lmaoooo #his coworkers bought me drinks?? this is what it feels like to have pretty privilege 💅🏻 #we gotta go to bf’s parents house first to pick up all the cat stuff we bought #and then we’ll be driving to the town he went to college at to pick up the little guy!!! #we’re bringing him some treats so he’s comfortable during the long car ride 🥺🥺 omg you guys im already so in love w him #i had a dream about our cat last night lol #also had a dream that the sims 4 came out with a haunted unicorn expansion pack #where your sims could dress up as a very scary looking unicorn for the haunted unicorn festival. also some of the suits came with drugs #you’d wear a unicorn suit and it would get u really stoned or make you feel like you were tripping on acid. very strange stuff #the unicorn suits were so creepy looking you guys lol my dreams are always so strange #ok thats all bye love you xo