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dawnofh · 1 year

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Calling 141 by their real names. [Headcannon]

Price

As soon as he here’s anything but “Captain” or “Price”, you’re good as dead.

Would be a moment of silence before he turns to stare at you directly with a straight face, “What did you just call me, Soldier?”

Will turn to face you with the cigar still in his mouth then take a long drag. The silence is so loud.

His calm yet assertive voice is enough to make a grown man cry.

Respect your elders.

Would definitely death stare you if you did it in front of anyone but if you said it during a mission he’d smack your head then threaten you to keep this off the record.

Expect to be punished, at least 100 push-ups and a scolding should suffice as well as a 2hr lecture about respect then a transition into, “It’s because of that damn phone.”

Does not give two shits if it’s for a TikTok, “You call me Johnathan again and I’ll hang you from a rope.”

In conclusion, don’t fuck around with Price if you’re a Private. You’re asking to get killed, this man doesn’t play around.

However if you knew Price when he was a Lieutenant and was his subordinate, he might just let you off the hook because you’re practically family by now. By default anyone older than him and higher ranked can call him by name.

Even so he’d still be taken back by the fact you’ve said his name so casually. Would only allow you to say it out of work though.

He’s still going to threaten to hang you from a rope regardless.

Ghost

“That’s Lieutenant or Ghost to you, Soldier.”

Angry 6’4 British man.

Say your prayers, homeboy would likely cuss you out and threaten you in his thickest Manchester accent he can conjure up.

Doesn’t need to use intimidation tactics, he is the intimidation tactic.

You’ve heard enough ghost stories about him from your fellow peers. Therefore where you found the balls to call him Simon is beyond you.

Will probably let it slide once but if it happens again he’d either ignore you every time you address him by his name, give you a serious scolding or just stare. Will never get physical with his subordinates or any teammate for that matter unless it’s training.

His stare will 100% make you apologise and refer to him as “Sir” for as long as you are in the military.

Genuinely all this man has to do is stare. His stare speaks louder than words.

He has a major staring problem.

If you two have known each other for years upon years or if you’re higher ranked than him then Simon is fine. Especially if you’re part of 141 or out of work.

Still would stare at you if you call him by name.

Soap

“Only Ghost can call me Johnny.”

Wouldn’t get as upset as Price and Ghost.

Is probably really close and buddy-buddy with his subordinates, especially if he’s the one training them.

Don’t misunderstand and take advantage of his kindness as a ticket to disrespect him. This Scottish hawk will put you in a chokehold if you continuously call him by name.

Likely the type to chase you around base and if not will make you do 50 laps until he thinks you’ve learnt your lesson.

If you’re a sergeant like him, you probably wouldn’t take him seriously, “Oi John, get your ass over here.” “Would it kill you to just call me, Soap?”

You’d make fun of him by calling him different brands of soaps and sometimes your personal favourites “Sergeant Dishwash” or “Sergeant head and shoulders.” Every soap related joke you can think of.

*Upset Scottish noises*

If you’re close with him he doesn’t care, same with out of work but still, don’t call him Johnny. He’d much rather prefer John. Johnny is reserved for Ghost.

Gaz

“Just Gaz will do.”

Total sweetheart but has attitude.

Insults you with his lovely voice and accent, it barely sounds like an insult if he’s not yelling it.

Would reverse uno card by calling you by your name, “Hey Kyle.” “Hi Y/N.”

Gaz is a wild card, depending on his mood, your ranking and how close you two are he might just let it slide, shrug it off or flick you on your forehead.

If he’s salty about you calling him “Kyle” he’ll make an example out of you during training for the other rookies to see. “Today’s lesson, I will be showing you what happens when you address me by anything but Sergeant Gaz.”

Will not go easy on you, your face will kiss the floor. Lesson learnt.

If you two are friends or you’re higher ranked than him then it doesn’t phase him in the slightest.

Pretty chilled and down to earth type of guy. If he gives you respect then he expects the same back.

Extras:

Y/N: Good morning, Johnathan.

Price: *Sigh* We’ve been through this, Muppet. What is my name?

Y/N: Johnathan?

Price: No.

Y/N: John?

Price: Negative.

Y/N: John Price?

Price: We’re getting closer.

Y/N: Captain John Price.

Price: There you go.

[Credit: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMFsSJvLB/]

Y/N: Whaddup Simon.

Ghost: I don’t find you funny.

Y/N: Hey Johnny.

Soap: Only Ghost calls me Johnny, you may call me John.

Y/N: Sup Kyle

Gaz: What’s good, Fam.

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ineedtowritemorestuff · 1 year

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Listen imagine how pale Ghost would be. Man gets absolutely no sunlight. He literally would be white as a sheet. He actually would be reflective.

Soap and Gaz have tried to shine light on him to see how much it reflects.

Imagine jokes about 'are you called ghost cause you're pale and white as one'

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sabosbabygirl · 4 months

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Soap and you cuddling:

Soap is definitely a switch. Sometimes a big spoon and other times the little spoon. He loves wrapping his muscular arms around you. He prefers to be face-to-face with you so he can look into your beautiful eyes and kiss your forehead.

NSFW: When is he is horny, he loves cuddling you from the back. Feeling your ass against his cock. His hands on your waist and rubbing your thighs up and down. You purposely arch your back so your ass pushes against his cock more. He would moan and then whisper in your ear: “You tryin to start something?” in a teasing tone while lightly dry humping your ass until you both become frustrated and he lowers your pants and sticks it in your wet pussy raw.

He likes when you cuddle him. It makes him feel vulnerable and trustworthy of you. He’s always wanted someone like that. Someone he can take care of and who will take care of him. He loves feeling you tickle his back while you are the big spoon. Your fingers on his skin is enough to put him to sleep and dream of you.

Soap loves cuddling with you and would to anything to just stay with you in bed for hours.

#smut #soap x you #johnny soap mactavish #cod mw2 soap #soap x reader #soap cuddling #call of duty

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luminousbeings-crudematter · 5 months

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Entanglement (2/2)

PAIRING: Johnny "Soap" MacTavish x Medic F!Reader

WARNINGS: allusions to smut || MDNI

A/N: I promised a sober part 2 for the 141 challenge by @glitterypirateduck || but it's very late because I am physically unable to get my shit together || but I made it softer and sweeter than the first part to make up for it :')

Prompts used: Secluded beach, pursuit (used literally as in one person chasing another), “I need a ride”, “Here, I’ll show you”

Part 1 || Part 2 ||

____

He ships out for a tour that keeps extending for some stupid reason or another and you don’t see him for three months.

You tell yourself that your position as one of the medical personnel on base means that you must be present at the landing pad when the 141 arrive, you must check that they’re all okay and that no one’s injured and that you must search desperately, panic clear on your face, neck craning this way and that until you see him. Until Johnny’s face comes into view, laughing at something, because of course he is, and then you can start to convince yourself that your finally being able to breathe normally is attributable to none of the boys being injured.

Except…except when Johnny sees you, his brows shoot up to his hairline, and the smile on his face is beautiful, with just the slightest amount of smug. Such a horrible, annoying, perfect man.

He jogs to cover the last few feet between you, and stands in front of you, eyes just drinking you in—smiling, but pointedly not saying a word.

“I just wanted to make sure you weren’t hurt. Or anyone else,” you inform him quickly, eyes widening at your slip-up. “It’s um…it’s why I’m here.”

“‘Course, luv. No other reason, aye?” His eyes sparkle in the afternoon sun, and glove-covered fingers lightly brush your cheek. I can’t believe you’re here, his eyes tell you.

“Of course not! Just wanted to make sure that no one needed emergency care,” you whisper, leaning into his touch. Where else would I be?

“Thought about tha’ date yet, lass?” he says, and his attention is briefly drawn to Price rallying everyone to his office for the post-op debrief.

“Johnny,” you whisper, and his head whips around to look at you. “I…I—” You close your mouth quickly, too embarrassed to say anything when he stands there in front of you, looking like…well. That.

His brows are furrowed and concern floods the bright blue of his eyes. “Wha’ is it? I was only takin’ the piss, luv, dinna fash, it’s alrate if ye—,”

“I have the next three weeks off. I’m going to Scotland. Edinburgh.”

“Edinburgh,” he repeats, his eyes wide and shocked. And then his expression changes. It’s subtle at first, but the smile that breaks over his face makes you feel like you’re looking straight at a sunrise, and you almost want to squint at its brilliance. “Coincidence, lass. I’m on leave m’self. Might find myself in Edinburgh too, y’know?”

***

Johnny does finds himself in Edinburgh.

And he finds himself equal parts impressed and happy and captivated when he learns of the hoops you had to jump through to arrange annual leave at the same time as him. “So ye lied, eh?”

“I—no! I didn’t lie! I just withheld information, that’s all.” You pause and turn to him, gingerly reaching out to hold one of his hands in both of yours and looking down at your intertwined fingers. “I really wanted to be here with you.”

Lazulite.

When you look up into his eyes, you’re met with pure, warm, melted lazulite. His eyes hold you captive and you find that you want to drown in them, a prisoner by choice.

When he doesn’t look away and you feel warmed by his gaze, you turn to look at the horizon, taking a couple of steps away from him and towards the water.

It’s cold, so very unbearably cold, the freezing water and the frigid breeze it incites doing their jobs of keeping people out of the outdoors. You’re alone with him on the beach, the tiny shops in the beach-town in the distance calling your names with the promise of warm food and an ale for your troubles. But, the time for that will come…just, not yet.

You turn back to Johnny and find that he’s moved closer to you, standing at the edge of the water with you. “Ah’m glad ye changed yer mind,” he says. “Ah’ve been…looking forward to this.”

“Oh yeah?” you challenge, grinning. “What specifically have you been looking forward to?”

He shrugs nonchalantly. “Pussy from the 141’s medic, obviously.”

Your gasp is dramatic and your eyes bulge at his words, too shocked to respond with anything but a bewildered “What? What?!”

But when Johnny doesn’t respond to you, doubled over in laughter, wheezing at your expression, you know exactly how to get him back. You’ve barely even considered the consequences in your mind before you bend down and use both hands to splash him with the Arctic-temperature water, and he splutters, looking back up at you in shock.

You’re both frozen for a moment, before his expression narrows—“Oh, yer’ in a world of trouble now, lass,” he growls—and you make a run for it.

The only sounds on the beach are the gentle sounds of the water on the shore, your shrieking laughter on the beach and Johnny’s occasional taunts as he chases after you. You know he only lets you run away from him because it’s fun—the chase, the sound of your laughter, the adrenaline warming you both despite the cold winter air. The man was a beast in the gym and on the track, could’ve caught you in a second if he wanted to, but this is fun.

Everything about being with him is fun.

When he finally catches you, his large arms go around you and he lifts you, chuckling in your ear while he spins you around. Your heart is full at that moment, so completely overflowing with your infatuation for him, so completely joyous at his cheesy actions that make you feel like you’re in one of your guilty-pleasure movies. Being on a date with him is exactly like what you’d imagined—he’s effortlessly charming, naturally funny, attentive to you, and most importantly, he’s enjoying himself too.

You can’t believe you’d been saying no to this for months, denying yourself the pleasure of being with him for months. The thought boggles your mind a bit and you forget all your reasons for doing it in the first place.

So overwhelmed are you by your inner turmoil that when he finally sets you down, you turn around to face him, promptly put your palms on his cheek and kiss him full on the mouth. He’s shocked, frozen for a second but seems to snap out of it, and kisses you back. One arm goes around your waist to pull him flush to you, the other winds around you to rest on the nape of your neck. There’s no escape from the intensity of his kiss, even if you wanted it.

And you don’t want to leave his embrace anytime soon.

His body shields you from the bitter cold, pulling you into his warmth until you’re left feeling like your bodies have been fused together. Johnny is just as playful while he’s kissing you as he is at any other time. He’s all enthusiasm and exploration, sharp little nips on your bottom lip, soothed by gentle licks. When you hungrily open your mouth for him, you’re rewarded by the taste of what you will come to learn is just Johnny.

He grips you even tighter, not even enough space for air to pass in between you, gets carried away by the way you sigh and moan into his mouth, and when he grinds into you, you freeze because you can feel him. Hard, against your thigh.

Johnny whines when you stop kissing him back, your lips motionless against his, but releases you in a second when he realises that you’ve frozen against him. “Bonnie, y’okay?”

“Erm, yeah, I—” you cut yourself off, because your cheeks are starting to warm and you don’t know where to look right now. Definitely not at him, but you also cannot look down because what if your eyes wander to his crotch, and you cannot and must not be caught looking at his crotch and—

“Hey…y’alright? What’s wrong, luv?”

Hm, how do you diplomatically and politely tell him that grinding against his hard cock had jarred you for a second and made you flood your panties with your arousal the next? “N-no nothing’s wrong, I uh. I was wondering…” you say softly, looking up at him from underneath your lashes. “Do you want to go back to the hotel? If it’s alright, I need a ride.”

His pupils contract to pinpricks. “Ah’ll give you a ride, bonnie.”

***

Of all the things you thought would happen between the two of you in your hotel room after the first time you fucked, this wasn’t it.

“Ye wanted to know what I was looking forward to? Here, I’ll show you.”

He proceeds to demand that you stay in bed while he sneaks into the bathroom and shuts the door quietly behind him. Ten minutes later, the man emerges, victorious, with pink cheeks and looking mighty proud of himself. He leads you by the hand into the bathroom, and helps you take off the fluffy, indulgent bathrobe he’d put on you.

The bath’s running, steam swirls around the room, warming it pleasantly, and Johnny’s managed to find a candle, somehow.

“Get in, lass, come on.”

“Only if you come in with me,” you say, smiling.

If you were any kind of artist, you know your masterpiece would be your recreation of Johnny’s face in that moment—blushing, eyes downcast shyly, the perfect contradiction to the man who’d brought you to ruin only a few minutes ago.

You both take turns sinking into the warmth of the water, and when you’re finally settled, your back to his chest, your head leaning on his shoulder, you sigh deeply. He brings your hand up to his mouth and gives your knuckles a kiss. In quiet, hushed words you both decide on a strategy for keeping this thing you’ve just discovered private, just for the two of you at the moment.

“And so when you say we’re not telling anyone, that also means you’re not going to tell Gaz?” you ask, sceptically.

“Naw, bonnie, we agreed. I didnae ken what ye mean.”

“...yeah, okay, Johnny. How about…three dates? Three successful dates, and then you can tell your boyfriend about me.”

You hear him sputter behind you and it makes you chuckle. “We’re gonna ‘ave more than three dates in the next few weeks, bonnie.”

“Oh?” You turn around slowly, mindful of the water splashing out the sides of the bathtub and shift so you’re straddling him. His eyes widen slightly at the sight of your wet body against his, and his hands grip the flesh on your hips immediately. “Is that so? What makes you so confident you’re going to get a second date?”

“I’m no’ a betting man,” he says, conspiratorially. “But if ah were…the way you sucked my cock, bonnie?” He leans back with a contented sigh and a look of overconfidence on his face. “I’d say ah’m gonna get a second date.”

“Hmm,” you say noncommittally, and he leans forward to kiss you.

“And a third,” he says, smiling against your mouth. “And a fourth.”

“Maybe you’re right,” you concede. “You’ll have to work hard for a fifth, though, Johnny.”

And when Johnny’s fingers touch you between your thighs at the words, his expression even and not betraying his intentions whatsoever, you’re convinced he’s going to work hard and get that fifth date.

#141challenge #johnny mctavish #johnny mactavish x reader #cod mw2 #call of duty #lumi writes #john soap mctavish x reader #cod soap #johnny soap mctavish x reader #soap mactavish #cod mw2 soap #cod mw fanfiction #johnny soap mactavish #soap fluff

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silence-caravan · 11 months

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They are in the middle of a mission

they are eepy~

#fanart #cod fanart #cod mwii #cod mw2 #call of duty modern warfare 2 #cod mw2 ghost #cod mw2 soap #john soap mactavish #soap #simon ghost riley #soapghost #ghost x soap #ghost

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freestyle-crocodile-trashpile · 1 year

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how about male reader in bed and hugging a pillow with COD men shirt as a pillow casing and the COD men just come in and see

[A/n:Thank you for requesting]

Summary:You were laying in bed with your pillow which had one of their shirts as the case

Type:Hcs:Price X M!Reader: Soap X M!Reader: Alejandro X M!Reader: Rodolfo X M!Reader

Version:Mw2

Soap

He would he surprised at first

And honestly he'd find it adorable

He'd go up to you and ask if you wanted the real deal instead of a pillow

If you say yes he'll climb into bed with you and hold you close

It might be a dream come true for you but for him? He's shaking with excitement right now

Rodolfo

Honestly rudy wouldn't react much

He probably won't notice, even when he did get closer he still wouldn't notice

Rudy really wouldn't notice until you told him

Then he'd be surprised like really surprised

He wouldn't believe you, but then he'd realized he is indeed missing a shirt

Price

He would notice instantly, like the day you took the shirt he'd instantly know

As soon as he got to your room he'd start questioning you about were his shirt was

When he seen your pillow he would instantly be shocked

Price....might cry, it's such a nice act even tho it wasn't a open one

He'd love it and give you more shirts

Alejandro

He'd know but wouldn't say anything

Like he just purposely leave shirts in your room just so you have more options

But if he gets petty he'll take all his shirts back

Also he'd give you the fun design shirts he has

Or the ones he had as a kid just to confuse you

[A/n:so you never said who you wanted so I just picked for you. I hope you enjoyed]

#cod price #cod modern warfare #cod x male reader #cod mw2 #call of duty #call of duty mw2 #cod alejandro #cod rudy #cod soap #cod x reader #cod mw2 x reader #cod mw2 x male reader #cod mwii #cod mw2 soap #cod mw2 alejandro #cod mw2 price #cod mw2 rudy

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analogh0rror · 1 year

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😫 insert soap crushing asmr videos

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sm1lec1de · 1 year

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Simon’s Adoration

Absolutely in need of a fic where Simon is absolutely WHIPPED for Johnny. Something that comes across my mind fairly often is how much Simon would love and cherish Johnny because of what he’s done for him.

Johnny helped him find Simon inside of Ghost again and was finally able to be a loving and nurturing man. With that, Simon would be at Johnny’s side 24/7 to keep him absolutely safe. Johnny would ask him nicely to give him privacy (not that he really minds, he just needs it on occasion) and each time Simon is hesitant but allows him as much time as he needs. Once Johnny is done with his alone time, Simon is glued to his side once again.

Johnny would ask Simon to help with something and he wouldn’t hesitate for even a second. If someone else asks, it’s simply a harsh “No,” or “I’m busy.” Simon would do anything for Johnny, and he knows it. Sometimes Johnny will even use this to his advantage to see Simon go off on some random recruit that made a rude remark about Johnny behind their backs.

This obviously doesn’t settle with Captain Price very well and it is so unbelievably obvious to the rest of 141 that it becomes a huge joke, even going as far as some calling Ghost “Soap’s loyal pet.”

They’re so fucking cute and I NEED more of this,, Umikochannart made a post that heavily inspired my need for this but yes I love them and I need more of them.

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bottledwhiskey · 1 year

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Departure

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dawnofh · 1 year

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Hello I hope you day is going well. I don’t know if you do requests but you write 141 so well and I was hoping if you could write a gn reader just going up to the pals and just tagging them and saying tag your it and running away. Please��.

I don’t really do requests but I loved the idea, thanks. Have an amazing day🫶

Tagging 141 then running away [Headcannon]

Price

“Tag, Captain!! You’re it!!”

As you run away, Price just stares at you, with both disappointment and concern.

His thoughts are, It’s that damn phone again.

Will never entertain your childish behaviour because this is modern warfare not a playground.

However if you tag him and take his bucket hat then he’s suddenly Usain Bolt.

He finna hunt you down.

“You fuckin Muppet, have you lost your bloody mind?!”

Expect to be hit or injured in some way. You’ll be hurt emotionally and physically.

He’s the, ‘I’ll give you something to cry about’ type of parent.

If for some reason he is a parental figure to you, he still won’t entertain your childish behaviour. “Stop it, get some help.”

No matter what he doesn’t give two shits about your dumb game and will simply shake his head trying to figure out when and how he went wrong with you.

Might just pull out a gun or knife on you one of these days, “Tag me again and you’re losing all 5 fingers today.” Please don’t tag him.

Ghost

There is a time and place for everything. I repeat, there is a time and place for everything.

“Tag!! You’re it!!” Simon wouldn’t even react, he would simply watch you run then move on with life.

If Ghost took things personally then Rodolfo would’ve flown through the windscreen for making that mask joke.

Simon would get you back at the worst time, “Lieutenant I’m scared to jump.” You looked down at the cliff, wondering if the water would be able to break your fall. He’d give you that Ghost stare then put a hand on your shoulder and go, “Tag. You’re it.” Before pushing you off.

On a normal basis, just like Price he wouldn’t entertain you nor give you the time of day.

“Lieutenant do you even know what tag is?” You question if this man had a childhood or even had friends. Although he wouldn’t take lightly to the question and just stare to shut you up.

His anger doesn’t show in person so he’ll take it out on you during training, make you run around the base just because he can, “C’mon Soldier, pick up the pace!! I thought you liked running?!!”

Realistically speaking, you actually wouldn’t want to be chased by a 6’4 British man in a skull mask. That’s pure nightmare fuel and would likely give you PTSD for the rest of your life.

Soap

Competitive asf.

“Tag!! You’re it!!” as soon as you run away slowly as a joke you realise Soap actually got up to chase you, “STOP!! I DON’T WANT TO PLAY ANYMORE, SERGEANT!!!!!”

Don’t start something you can’t finish.

Soap is hella competitive and takes the game very seriously, there is no place on this base you could possibly run and hide.

Immobilises you to get a win.

‘It’s just a prank, bro.’ energy

“Let’s spice the game up by tagging each other with grenades.” “Sergeant what the fuck-“ “Okay fine…knives.” “Sergeant please-“

Is likely to start initiating the game to which Price disapproves of and shuts it down immediately.

Might even take the game a step further by doing it one time during a mission to which Ghost slaps you both at the back of your heads.

Never does it again but would offer to play hide and seek or the floor is lava at the base, so long as neither of you are caught.

Switches up real quick when Price or Ghost are around, “Y/N. How old are you?”

John was most likely that one kid in school who took tag too seriously therefore tag is now banned at the base.

Gaz

“Tag you’re—“ “IT!!!”

Gaz was that fast kid in school. He’s the one kid no one was able to tag and is an ankle breaker.

Will climb over tables and cars just to tag you back.

Probably is the type to trip you when you’re walking, so be warned when playing tag, this man will two feet you just to get a victory.

You two annoy the shit out of Price. He becomes a human shield when you two insist on running around him just so the other can avoid getting tagged.

You and Gaz will probably go around tagging the entire base and somehow get everyone involved. All fun and games until someone tags Price or Ghost.

Tag with Gaz becomes the extreme hide and seek. He’d quite literally sit in a tree and wait for you to walk pass so he can jump down and tag you. Unlike Soap, he genuinely does take the game as a joke but wants to win.

You two might even be able to convince Price to make tag a training exercise. With some terms and conditions however.

During missions you’d sneakily still play. Except tag in ghillie suits is not ideal and there’s a small chance of tagging the enemy.

Tag but make it sniping, “Tag, dude with the hat is down.” “Tag, guy with the balaclava is down.” “Tag, macho looking man is down.”

“Shut the actual fuck up, Muppets.”

Just like that. Tag is banned again.

#cod mw22 #cod headcanons #cod mw2 gaz #cod mw2 soap #codmw2 ghost #cod mw2 price #cod x reader #cod x gn reader #kyle gaz garrick #john soap mactavish #john price #simon ghost riley

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ineedtowritemorestuff · 1 year

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Listen i see all your post about Jealous Ghost and newbies hitting on Soap but c'mon Jealous Soap is funnier.

Imagine newbies hitting on Ghost. Like they have a competition on who can make the masked man crack. He's like a legend for the newbies and everyone wants to try and get into his pants and under his mask. Soap hearing about this competition and being jealous.

He watches newbies hit on Ghost everyday and finally snaps one day cause it's his boyfriend goddamnit. He finally just kissed his bf infront of all the newbies

#cod #cod mw2 #cod mw2 ghost #cod mw2 soap #cod mwii #call of duty mwii #call of duty #soap mw2 #ghostsoap #ghost x soap #ghost cod #simon ghost riley #johnny soap mactavish #soapghost #soap cod #cod ghost #simon riley

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persesphonestears · 1 year

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More cod incorrect quotes

A/N: There is an obvious pattern cause I used a generator lmao anyway

C/W: uh swearing? i think thats it for once

Ghost: Favourite horror movie?

Soap: It

Price: Saw

Gaz: Annabelle

R/n: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

Price: You're a loose cannon, Ghost.

Ghost: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?

Soap: I think you play by your own rules.

Gaz: No way, they think rules were made to be broken.

Price: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.

Ghost: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. R/n is a loose cannon.

R/n: *smashes a chair*

Price: Good morning.

Ghost: Good morning.

Soap: Good morning.

Gaz: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.

R/n: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS

Price: Where's Ghost, Soap, and Gaz?

R/n: They're playing hide and seek.

Price: Where?

R/n: I don't think you get how this game works.

Price: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?

Ghost: Several traffic violations.

Soap: Three counts of resisting arrest.

Gaz: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

R/n: Also, that’s not our car.

Price: Nothing in life is free.

Ghost: Love is free!

Soap: Adventure is free.

Gaz: Knowledge is free.

R/n: Everything is free if you take it without paying.

R/n: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.

Ghost: ... Your what?

R/n: My friends.

Price: Are they saying “friends”?

Gaz: I think they're being sarcastic.

Soap: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, R/n! All of your friends are in this room.

R/n: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.

Price: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife?

Gaz: Rude.

Soap: That’s fair.

Ghost: Not again.

R/n: Are you going to want this back? Or can I keep it?

R/n: Is having a penis fun?

Ghost: It has its ups and downs.

Soap: Sometimes it’s a little hard.

Gaz: It’s a pain in the ass.

R/n: Oh, Jesus, fuck, guys, come on.

Gaz: That's it, we're gonna go out and find what we need!

Price: To the city?

Gaz: Yeah, no matter what!

R/n: Well- How exactly do you propose we do that, exactly?

Gaz: I... I don't know!

Ghost: Oh come off it, be serious!

Gaz: I am serious!

Ghost: You're insane!

Soap: Why, if only we were all wiener dogs, our problems would be solved!

Everyone:

Price: What???

Soap: Or maybe it was a basset hound!

R/n: no no maybe Soap is onto something..

Ghost, panicked: YOU'RE ALL INSANE!

Price: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what R/n will and will not eat.

Ghost: Grass? Yes!

Price: Moss? Yes!!

Ghost: Leaves? Ohh, yes!

Price: Shoelaces? Strange but true!

Ghost: Worms? Sometimes!

Price: Rocks? Usually not.

Ghost: Twigs? Usually!

Price: Soap's cooking? Inconclusive!

Gaz: How did you… test this?

Price: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it.

Gaz: ... I don’t know how to feel about this.

Soap: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

Price: Are we really going to let R/n keep the cat?

Gaz: Hey we kept R/n.

Price: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?

Ghost: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.

Price: Three of us saw it, Ghost. How do you explain that?

Ghost: *points at Soap* Sleep deprivation. *points at Gaz* Paranoia. *points at R/n* Delusional personality disorder.

Price, trying to convince R/n to join the task force: You know... I thought it'd be good to have someone alongside us who's really... smart!

Gaz: And loud!

Soap: And grumpy!

Ghost: And oblivious to reality

R/n:

Price: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one!

Gaz: Tubular AF!

Soap: Mood to the max!

Ghost, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it.

R/n, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she’s a square.

Price: Tf

Price: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life

Ghost: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years

Soap: Oh wow, my innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Gaz: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!

R/n: My entire childhood and happiness, is that you?

Price:

Price: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my mother left me but do you guys need a hug?

Price: What does 'take out' mean?

Soap: Food

Gaz: Dating

Ghost: Murder.

R/n: IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOU'RE NOT A LIL BITCH.

Price: Anyone d-

Ghost: Depressed?

Gaz: Drained?

Soap: Dumb?

R/n: Done with life?

Price: -done with their work... need to get Laswell to get you all therapy …

Price: So uhhh... question: my ‘friend’ keeps on going into the pantry and grabbing handfuls of fettuccine... uncooked...

Gaz: I would hope they're not grabbing handfuls of cooked fettuccine!

Soap: In your pantry!

Price: Yeah... and eating them raw, and they keep calling them 'chips'. ... How do I make them stop?

Ghost: Is your friend here?

Price, motioning to R/n: Yeah.

Gaz, to R/n: You're a monster! Words MEAN things! >:(

Soap: Does anybody remember- I haven't been to Olive Garden in many moons- but they DO have a like- fettuccine bottle that you can just- grab em out of and chew-

Soap: HOLD ON. WAS THIS A PRANK YOU GUYS PULLED ON ME WHEN WE WENT TO OLIVE GARDEN AFTER THAT MISSION?!

Soap: NO, STOP. EVERYBODY SHUT UP. DO THEY GIVE YOU RAW FETTUCCINE TO CHEW ON IN THE LOBBY OF THE OLIVE GARDEN

Everyone else: No.

Soap, to Gaz and R/n: YOU FUCKIN BASTARDS

Gaz: YAAAAAAAAY!

R/n: THE PRESTIGE!

Price: What did you guys get in your yearbook?

Gaz: 'Prettiest Smile'

Soap: 'Nicest Personality'

Ghost: 'Most likely to start a bar fight'

R/n: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'

Price: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?

Soap: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies

R/n: Socks are Feetie Heaties

Gaz: Forks are Stabby Grabbies

Soap: Defibrillators are Heartie Starties

R/n: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies

Gaz: Stamps are Lickie Stickies

Ghost, annoyed: You are disappointments

Price to Ghost: You agreed to join the team.

Soap: I’m an idiot.

Ghost:

Price:

Gaz:

R/n:

Soap:

R/n: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.

This stupid long omg, uh anyway I used a incorrect quote generator cause I'm lazy but edited most of them so the make some more sense :>

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