#closure headers

[evermorre]

closure headers

CLOSURE STANS RISE! in honor of my url change, I’ve made 4 different closure headers. Each should be 640x360. No need to credit me if you use them, but please reblog if you do!  Other headers and variations under the cut, including ones with black and white dividers. 

#ts edit #ts gifs #tscreatorsnet #networkthirteen #candy swift #on the way home i wrote a poem #ts headers #closure headers #evermore headers #tsuserelena #tsuserbee #tsuserclaire #tsuserkatie #tsuseremily #tsuserlaura #tsusertara #usercruellesummer #userel #userasif #userpurpleswift #usermanaal #usercellphonehippie #tsusertori #userplaceinthisworld #userabbieb #userclem #userlizzo #tsusersage #userartistry

[leclercdream]

tell me who i am pt.4 (final part)

pairing: daniel ricciardo x reader

our favorite couple has some news

author's note: just a little closure. this took SO LONG im so sorry i just couldnt find it in myself to do the whole social media thingy! but here we are, the last part of this smau!! hope you like it

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 ending

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 34,435 others

yourusername: for your eyes only

tagged: danielricciardo

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danielricciardo

liked by landonorris, yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 349,231 others

danielricciardo: Greece slam dump ⛱️

tagged: yourusername

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user1: how is he doing this trip in the middle of a tripple header? its insane ↳ user4: i know right? my bet is on a proposal or sth

user2: mom and dad

landonorris: 👀👀👀 ↳ user2: what do you know? ↳ landonorris: NOTHING ↳ user3: LANDO ?????

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 56,398 others

yourusername: can we always be this close?

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danielricciardo: Can't wait to spend forever with you

charles_leclerc: congratulations guys!

lilymhe: AHH i'm so happy for you!! ❤️

alexandrasaintmleux: my favorite couple!! congrats ❤️

landonorris: parents!!! did he manage to surprise you? planning was exhausting

↳ yourusername: he did, i actually wasn't expecting it at all haha thanks for helping lan! you are my favorite child

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danielricciardo

liked by landonorris, yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 465,293 others

danielricciardo: Forever and ever. She said yes!

tagged: yourusername

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yourusername: loml i cant wait to marry you

maxverstappen1: Told you she would say yes! Congrats guys

landonorris: ready to be the best man

oscarpiastri: Congrats! Making the aussie fam bigger

lewishamilton: Congratulations man! Already excited for the wedding

alphataurif1: Saving a forever seat at the garage! Congrats 🥰

user1: OMG LSKDJAL

user2: this cant be real. HER?

user3: congratulations!! this makes my heart full

user4: you better say sorry to this girl for all she went through

taglist: @urmotheris @minkyungseokie @dhhdhsiavdhaj @dl-yum @1655clean @skepvids @forevercaffeinated-lee @laneyspaulding19 @dark-night-sky-99 @bibissparkless @crlsummer

#f1 x reader #daniel ricciardo #daniel riccardo x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #daniel riccardo imagine #f1 fic #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris x y/n #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen x you #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz fluff #carlos sainz fic #charles leclerc fic #charles leclerc imagines #daniel ricciardo fluff #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x you #lewis hamilton fluff #lewis hamilton imagine #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri imagine #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri fanfic #f1 smau

[writingreadinglurkingandsmirking]

It's So Hard To Watch (Everything I Want) - reality tv star!Rafe Cameron x Reader

I Feel You Underneath My Tongue (Next To Every Word That I Should Have Said): Part 1, Part 2

Summary: You and Rafe had a long history together. The love that you shared wasn’t something that you’d ever questioned–not even when you guys were on a break from your relationship. But, suddenly he’s ghosting you. And the next thing you know? You’re getting a call from an MTV producer saying your ex Rafe is a contestant on Are You The One? and they need to come in for the ex’s episode of the show. And well, you couldn’t say no, could you?

CW/TWs: angst, female reader implied, cursing, toxic relationships afoot, a brief description of physical violence, implied previous physical violence, verbal harassment/abuse, not the most edited/reviewed

Words: 8.4k+

Note: Yes I used pretty boy blonde-era Drew for my header what about it!! And also? I used Jeff Probst because I thought it would be funny OBVIOUSLY he’d never host a reality tv dating show goodbye. So I started writing this a long time ago, forgot about it, and just revisited it to finish ‘er up. Now that said, uhhhhh I think I mayyyyy do a part 2 where Rafe gets back home because this is uhhhhh depressing and I Need closure. But! We’ll see!

Rafe Cameron had never been one you’d see going on a fucking reality TV show. No. Not at all, in fact. You had known him for the majority of his life. You’d dated the idiot for three years too. After the breakup, you went no contact for your own sake—he was impossible to be around and not fall back into his arms, no matter how much you hated it. Rafe hated it more, though. He tried desperately in the nearly year and a half since your break-up to get back together. You watched as he genuinely worked on changing himself and improving.

But then, suddenly, four months earlier he’d gone radio silent. You’d be the worst kind of liar if you said that it hadn’t hurt you. The abrupt cut-off had made you realize just how close you’d been to taking him back. Apparently, that wasn’t in the cards, though. Apparently, he was entirely over you. No matter how much you utterly fucking hated that. No matter how much it fucking destroyed you after those first two weeks of realizing that he wasn’t going to be coming back.

It got even weirder, though when a fucking MTV producer reached out to you. We’re with MTV’s Are You The One? they’d explained. You’re the ex of one of our contestants Rafe Cameron. Literally what? Would you be interested in getting a trip to Hawaii and being part of the experience? And again, unendingly now, what the actual fuck had Rafe gotten himself into? And why the fuck was he trying to have you be dragged into it?

All of the emotions that flooded you when that phone call started were…violent to say the least. And you were sad too. Part of you had hoped that Rafe would get the fuck over himself and call you again. Part of you hoped that you would’ve been able to give it another shot. But no. Apparently, he’d decided it’d be much more fun to just, you know, go on a stupid dating show with MTV and find his alleged perfect match. It made you sick to your stomach.

Are You the One was a show that felt like it was ripped from your worst nightmares. At least if Rafe was a contestant on it with someone else. The show had a dating algorithm that helps quantify compatibility for twenty-two people. It uses, according to the producer, in-depth interviews, some questionnaires, and then compatibility tests too. So, in the end, the contestants are set with their ideal match. With “their one” apparently. So, the unaware participants have to then get to know each other and undergo tests all while living with all of each other. And if, in the end, all eleven couples were able to figure out who they were after all eight weeks were up then they’d walk away with one million dollars and, potentially, the future love of their life.

The thought of Rafe meeting…

Naturally, you accepted the producer’s offer.

Topper, one of your best friends, even now–even after everything, told you how stupid of an idea it was to agree.

Even so, he booked his own tickets to come to Hawaii with you.

And that was how you found yourself at an insanely gorgeous resort in Oahu a month later with little to no information on what was actually going on or what would be expected of you. The only consolation was that you were far from the only ex here. It looked like every contestant had one person here for them. You were, however, one of the only… normal-seeming ones. Not for the first time since landing you cursed yourself for going along with this stupidity. Sure they wouldn’t really have another ex to call for Rafe that was actually an ex but that was their problem, not yours. Besides, if there’s one thing MTV can do it’s lie about their reality television shows. Even so, waiting in their stupid green room area altogether for whatever stupid instructions were to come next felt…well, stupid.

You heard your name called over your shoulder and you turned your head. “Hey, pretty girl. Now who is your ex again?” asked an extremely tall, well-built, and objectively gorgeous man next to you. He was grinning at you, the look in his eyes displaying an all-too-familiar attraction. But, if there was one thing you weren’t going to be doing? Fucking any of these weirdos. But, a little flirting couldn’t help. “Was it…was it Ryan?”

“So close. Rafe,” you corrected, giving him a half-smile. “It’s Alex, right? And your ex was Thalia?” He nodded. You hummed, shrugging. They’d shown you the audition videos they’d been given and Thalia seemed…interesting. “She looked super beautiful.”

“Yeah, beautiful and an absolute fucking nutcase,” he said seriously, even as he grinned. “She was always doing some dumb shit. Trying to accuse me of cheating on her when I was at work. Trying to fuck my brother when I told her that we were done.”

You let out a low whistle. “Damn, so you got a score to settle then,” you mused, leaning back in the chair to look at him. “I can respect that. I’m sure the producers love it.”

He nodded. “Oh they do,” he confirmed. He nudged your shoulder playfully and then winked. “Sorry, but I might be dragging your man down because of it. Word on the street is they’ve been paired up the past two weeks or something.” Your heart squeezed in a sad pain and you dutifully ignored it. “Don’t trip though, I’m gonna set him straight on what’s up with Thalia.”

“I don’t care,” you immediately replied, voice sharp and entirely unconvincing.

He barked out a laugh. “Yeah, sure,” he agreed, rolling his eyes. “You’ve been sitting here alone in your own little world instead of talking to all of us so I got a feeling you’re a little wrapped up in all this. And in him.” You shook your head in denial, rolling your eyes at the very true accusation. He chuckled again and this time you raised an eyebrow at him. “So what? Did y’all like break up a week before he came on or whatever?”

Clenching your jaw, you reminded yourself that this was just a stranger making conversation. There was no need to blow up on him. That was Rafe’s thing, not yours. “We broke up like a year and a half ago,” you said plainly.

“After how long?” he asked curiously.

“We’ve known each other since we were kids. We started on and off hooking up in…like high school—which our friends hated, of course. We went to separate colleges, but like…we just couldn’t stay away from each other. And by the time my senior year of college came? We were visiting each other practically every other weekend. Our friends had to inform us we’d been dating for like two years already at that point,” you said, shrugging. “But after he officially asked me and we made it exclusive…official…whatever? We were together for a little over three years.”

His nose wrinkled. “And y’all still run in the same circles and all that?” he asked, a sympathetic grimace on his face. You nodded. This time, he let out a low whistle. “Yeah, that’s fucked. Known each other your whole damn lives and he still couldn’t post up for you. That’s crazy. You’re way too beautiful to be treated like that.”

“I know,” you said dryly.

“Nah, sorry, sorry,” he said, winking. “I don’t mean it, like, to flirt with you. Promise.” You raised an eyebrow and he laughed. “Okay, only a little.” He sobered up, rubbing his hands together. “Still. Must be hard. Can’t even have that separation.”

You hummed. “No, we did. After the break up for like a month I didn’t talk to him. Avoided all our mutual friends, the whole bit. But then I remembered how much I fucking loved him regardless of our relationship. The…the issues that we had were…I didn’t leave him because I didn’t love him. I left him because I couldn’t keep enabling him. Remembered I didn’t want to lose that. So, like…I started to talk to him again. He was making genuine…good steps toward being a better man. One that he claimed would be worthy of me or whatever. But then five months ago or so he just…stopped talking altogether. Wouldn’t answer a phone call, text…nothing. So I just…took the hint. Next thing I knew I was getting a call from a fucking MTV producer. And now here I am. Talking to you.”

“You want him back?” the guy asked curiously. You glared half-heartedly at him. “No, no. I’m just asking because I fully plan to hook up with Thalia tonight, I ain’t gonna lie to you. So I’m just saying that door’s gonna be open.”

“All I want from him is to know why he went on a dating show and dragged me into it,” you corrected. He smirked at your side and you held up a hand in warning. “Don’t you say a damn word. What was I gonna do? Say no to a free Hawaiian vacation? Fuck that. I’m gonna stay here and enjoy myself.”

“Then go home to eat a metric ton of ice cream and cry, right?” he asked casually.

“Fucking Christ, dude we just met!” you said. “Why you dragging me like I’m the one dating your ex?”

He laughed. “Oh, no, baby girl, I’m gonna be dragging your ex. You? I’m just teasing,” he said.

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. “I mean, hey, feel free,” you said, inclining your head.

That seemed to end the conversation between you both. Just in time, it seemed because a producer then came and started herding the group around like cattle. Each of the exes was briefly obsessed over by assistants who made sure our outfits—ones they chose, of course—hair and makeup were all perfect. Only when everyone was set were you approached by another production assistant.

“Alright listen up!” the stern-looking young woman called. “We’re going to be sending you out in pairs. So whoever your ex is matched with currently is who you’re going to be going out with. We’re sending you out and leaving a minute gap between to get the reactions of the contestants. The plan is to send you out in order from the newest matches to the longest matches.” She glanced down at the clipboard in her hands. “So first we have the newest match Amelia and Jacques, so…Jordan and…also Jordan line up.”

You watched as male Jordan and female Jordan stood next to each other. On and on it went. Ten couples called before you. You felt your hand trembling at your side with unexpressed emotion and you drummed at your thigh in an attempt to stop it. Ten couples called before you.

“I told you they were together, gorgeous, didn’t I?” Alex whispered in your ear as you stood side to side.

“Last couple, and the longest…Rafe and Thalia,” she said. The words stung and settled in your stomach like lead. Your feet moved you into the line at the end before she’d even finished saying yours and Alex’s name. Alex stood next to you, his hand brushing the small of your back, bringing you back down to the moment, snapping out of the distraction. “Alright. From the top. First two, my Jordans, you’re out in two minutes. I’ll be right back to get you.”

“How you feeling hearing that?” Alex whispered to you. “It’s been six weeks in that fucking house and they’ve been together like all of it. I’m fucking pissed.”

“I don’t know why I came here,” you admitted after a moment.

He barked out a laugh. “Well, too late to back out now,” he said dryly.

“Yeah,” you whispered. You folded your arms across your chest watching as the first group was taken out then the next then the next then the next. Abruptly after the last before you were taken out, you looked to Alex. “Do I look okay?

“What?” he asked, surprised.

“Do I look okay? I can’t walk out there if I don’t look okay,” you replied anxiously, wringing your hands in front of you.

He looked you up and down grinning. “You look super fucking hot. Don’t worry about that,” he said easily, slinging his arm around your shoulder, jostling you gently as if you were lifelong friends and hadn’t met two hours earlier. “Now buck up, gorgeous. We gotta get our game faces on. We gotta go.”

As if summoned by his word, the production assistant came back for you two gesturing you two out into the fray. You kept your face carefully neutral, noting Alex doing the same at your side. You exited, eyes doing anything but looking in the direction of the contestants. You moved onto the pedestal where the other exes were, Alex’s hand touching your lower back as you both moved up. You gave him a half-smile, recognizing the reflexive protective gesture. You could feel burning stares on you and you hated it. Evidently, someone didn’t like that.

Eventually, having no other choice, you turned your eyes towards the contestants. The first place your eyes fell was on a taller woman, with perfectly tanned skin, gorgeous dark hair that practically hung to her ass, and—speaking of her ass, boy did she have a good one. Thalia. You could tell because your eyes drifting just to her side was your Rafe. No. Just Rafe. Her Rafe, actually. He looked relatively at ease by his posture. But, both of them were glaring at you and Alex.

“So,” came the voice of the host. “All of the exes are here.”

MTV had managed to bag Jeff Probst of all fucking people. Appropriate, you supposed considering that the show was modeled after Survivor in that there are competitions and voting involved. Much lower stakes all around, physically at least. Everyone nodded at Jeff’s words and you couldn’t help but try to pretend you were on the Survivor jury instead of standing here in this objectively awful situation. There was a low murmur from the contestants’ side. But, on the opposite platform, everyone was silent.

“Wow…pretty silent here,” Jeff commented. “Especially considering I know how loud all of you can be on days like this.” He looked pointedly over at the contestants. “So…how are we feeling? What’s it like seeing your exes standing here looking at you as you stand next to who you hope to be your perfect match?” He made a point of looking over at us and then back to the contestants. “Thalia, why don’t you tell us how you’re doing with all this.”

The girl next to Rafe took a dramatically deep, shaky breath. You watched as Rafe’s hand moved to her back, rubbing it soothingly. He looked down at her, a soft sort of look in his eyes and you felt nauseous in a way that you didn’t expect. You carefully steadied your breathing and focused your gaze just past them. She took a moment, turning towards Rafe and murmuring something that you were sure the mic packs on them could pick up even though you couldn’t hear it. You watched as Rafe replied quietly and then pressed a quick kiss to the side of her head.

It spiked your fucking blood pressure.

“Thalia,” Jeff prompted.

“Sorry, Jeff,” she said, a sugary sweet voice watery and wavering. “It’s just…it’s hard. To see him. And to see her too, honestly. I mean…I mean knowing what he did to me. Knowing what she did to Rafe. Hell, knowing what everyone else’s exes were like too…this just…it’s awful, honestly. We’re here to try and move forward and still somehow it feels like all we’re doing is sliding back.” She fanned at her eyes.

“You seem really upset,” Jeff said, nodding. “How does it…how is it that the mere presence of your exes could cause this much stress for you? Do you not have confidence in your relationships? Do you think this is going to cause problems…have the cracks started to show?”

“Fuck no!” Thalia snapped. “I just don’t want to even see this bitch. I don’t want to see her even fucking breathe in Rafe’s direction. I don’t want her ass to even speak on him. I know that the way she treated him and it doesn’t matter how fucking pretty she is on the outside I know what an ugly, horrible, frigid ass bitch she is on this inside! I don’t need that fucking energy around and Rafe sure as shit doesn’t! It’s not my fault she fumbled and lost him! He’s a fucking catch and I’m not gonna act like I’m not glad about it. He’s my man now and she’s just gonna have to deal with it. That’s it. The end. I don’t fucking care! I don’t want to see her stupid ass face.” She scoffed. “And you know me, Jeff. I’ll fucking beat someone’s ass if they fuck with the people I love.”

You didn’t particularly care about the girl’s words. You didn’t know her. She was an attention-starved brat…or rat if you were going to give in to the more malicious thoughts in your mind. She wanted to be famous…as famous as you could get from trashy reality TV, at least. Her words didn’t matter. Rafe’s reaction certainly did though. He just clenched his jaw and looked up towards the sky and then cast his eyes down. Still, his hand stayed on her back, rubbing it soothingly. That boiled your blood, admittedly. And, it seemed that the girl’s words actually pissed off Alex more.

“Watch your fucking mouth, Thalia. God, you don’t even know her,” he said snappily.

“Oh, and you do? You don’t fucking know her or the shit she’s done. Don’t even talk to me,” she snapped back in reply.

“Just like how these people don’t know all the shit that you’ve done!” he replied. He turned his eyes to Rafe. “And you? This girl? Who you claimed to love for years and years and years and have known like your whole life, what? You’re cool with some girl you met a month ago talking like that? The fuck is wrong with you, bro?”

“Don’t fucking call me bro,” Rafe said, a lazy, hard-edged smirk on his mouth and a glint in his eyes that displayed the carefully concealed rage just beneath the surface. “And you need to watch your fucking mouth coming in here talking like that to anybody.”

“Yeah, okay,” Alex scoffed, rolling his eyes.

Jeff cleared his throat. “Emotions are already running high,” he noted. He said your name, turning all eyes towards you. “You haven’t even said a word and yet you’ve been the center of attention since you came out here. So, what’s all this like for you?”

You hated the feeling of the lights and the eyes all on you. It made you want to twitch. Instead, you kept your face in a mask and shrugged. “Don’t particularly care,” you said blandly.

“Yeah because you’re an emotionless robotic bitch,” Thalia near-yelled.

“Thalia. Let’s let her talk,” Jeff said, his words a suggestion but tone a command. He turned back towards you, gesturing at you with his hand. “Please, go on. Tell us why you decided to come if you knew something like this might happen.”

You gave Jeff a saccharine smile. “Always wanted to visit Oahu,” you said, biting back the sarcasm that threatened to overcome you. The other exes laughed in amusement and agreement at the sentiment but sobered up when Jeff called us back to order.

“Nothing else? It didn’t have anything to do with a desire for closure? To feel like you had to warn someone else about Rafe? To see how you’d measure up to this potential new perfect match he has? These are just some of the reasons that exes on past seasons have given for their appearances,” Jeff pointed out.

“Nah, definitely not for closure…I don’t think this place is where you’d get something like that. You’d kind of be an idiot to try with some people, I’m sure,” you said. Then, you shrugged. “And I have no desire to warn other people about Rafe. Everyone’s got their own red flags and no one listens to advice anyways so there’s absolutely no point.” You hummed, lips twitching up for a moment then flattening out. “And yeah, I don’t care about whatever potential little…perfect match or whatever there is. I don’t compare myself to other people, even when they apparently desperately want me to. So…yeah, Jeff. It really just is the trip to Oahu. And hey? Who else were they gonna call for Rafe?”

Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies.

It was so much more than that.

You’d die before admitting it.

“Interesting,” he said. “And, not to make things uncomfortable. But let’s address the elephant in the room. You’ve looked at Rafe maybe twice since you came in here. What’s it like to be with him in a situation like this? What’s it like to have Alex next to you defend you from his own ex’s words all while Rafe doesn’t say anything?”

You let out a short laugh. “Yeah, I don’t usually stare at people, so I certainly don’t feel any sort of need to do so now. And I’m not particularly…surprised by him not defending me. It’s never been his style,” you said simply. You saw him tense slightly and roll his eyes but you ignored him wholly. You glanced over to Alex. “It was nice of Alex to defend me, I guess.” Thalia scoffed and you resisted the urge to launch yourself at her and punch her. You were better than that. You weren’t going to be the asshole here. It was going to be clear that it was her. You were determined. “But I’m a big girl. I can fight my own battles.”

Jeff nodded. “Well, you haven’t reacted to what most people here would consider a fight being brought directly in front of you. Thalia has made it extremely clear how she feels about you. She’s also made it extremely clear what the people in this house apparently think about your past relationship with Rafe. What do you say to all of that? Is that not worth fighting for?”

“That isn’t a fight,” you dismissed. “That’s people who don’t know me or the person that they’re getting…some form of information from. I don’t care how much trauma dumping you do in six weeks. You’re not gonna have a clue who you’re dealing with. I promise you that. So I don’t care what she’s saying at all—I’m never gonna have to see her again after this. I have people who care about me at home. I have people who know me. These people?” You look at all the participants and shrug. “No offense. I’m sure you’re all great in the real world. But you mean absolutely nothing to me. Your opinions mean less than nothing to me. Your opinions about me? Nothing. Your opinions about the relationship that I had with Rafe? Nothing.” You looked back to Jeff. “You want me to be honest, Jeff? I don’t think that the ‘fight’ being brought to me or whatever you wanna say is even worth this conversation.”

Jeff smiled and nodded at you. “One of the most mature responses that you could have in the face of someone being so openly hostile to you a minute after you even come out here,” he said. He looked over at Alex then. “And you, Alex? Do you feel the same?”

“Absolutely, Jeff,” he said, nodding. “I don’t know these people and I don’t care. They’re not why I’m here. But nah, unlike her I am gonna tell the facts of how Thalia is. Because I’m not cool with her walking around here acting like she’s a victim when she knows damn well she isn’t one.” He scoffed. “And knowing that she’s potentially a match with her ex or whatever? I’m sure she feels at least a little the same.”

“What do you mean by that?” Jeff coaxed.

Alex shook his head. “Just saying, Jeff,” he said vaguely. “I’m not gonna get into it yet. That’s for me and them to talk about later.” The nebulous reference clearly being either Rafe or Thalia…maybe even you. You truly didn’t care about that.

“Fair enough,” Jeff said. He clapped his hands together and turned his body towards the participants. “Now, Rafe…you’ve been very quiet so far today since you found out what was going on tonight. What’s going on in your mind?”

Rafe was silent for a moment. You watched as Thalia turned her body towards him placing her hand possessively on his stomach, stroking it as if trying to be soothing and missing the mark entirely. He didn’t spare her a glance. You could tell he was overwhelmed to some level and his brain was shutting down, only letting him focus on one thing at a time. You could see it in the slightly dazed expression and the pinched turn of his eyes.

“I don’t know Jeff. It’s always hard to see people who meant the world to you and then just…didn’t anymore,” Rafe said vaguely. You actively had to remind yourself to keep breathing evenly so your breath wouldn’t hitch in your throat at his words. “I mean, like, for all of us. These are people who were important in our lives somehow. They’re representations of problems we have in dating. All that. So yeah, it’s like seeing…I don’t know…your mistakes personified for a lot of us.”

You couldn’t help but recoil at that slightly, taking a half-step back like you took a physical blow. The words seemed to register with the rest of the crowd. Murmuring happened on both sides, some of disapproval of his words, some of approval of what he’d said. You took a deep breath, making your face neutral when you felt a girl next to you wrap her arm around your waist. You took the opportunity to use it to ground yourself, wrapping your hand around hers in turn. As much as you hated that you needed it, the support was appreciated.

“Wow,” Jeff said. He glanced at you, saying your name, and then back to Rafe. “Do you think she’s a mistake, Rafe?”

“She taught me a lot about myself,” Rafe said. “And I’ll always appreciate that. But not all relationships are supposed to last. Some of them are just to help us learn more about what we want in a relationship and nothing else.”

“You didn’t answer the question,” Jeff prodded. “Do you categorize your relationship with her as a mistake?”

Rafe looked at you and you met his eye head-on, refusing to be impacted.

You could tell what the answer was going to be before he even opened his mouth.

“Yes,” he said steadily. Immediately, he looked away.

You felt like someone had reached into your chest and tore your heart out. You were suddenly glad that your hand was wound around the girl so no one would see how you were shaking. Your face you could control. Even your tears. But your hands? No. All you wanted now was to go back to your room and call Topper and tell him that you were going to crash with him in Kona sooner than you planned. Crying to your best friend for comfort was the only thing that would even potentially work. But that would have to wait until the night was over. You would be strong until then. You had to.

The muttering amongst the groups on either side grew louder once again. You kept your brain fuzzy and uninvolved, not letting yourself sink into the sticky discomfort of your feelings that would swallow you and encase you in pain like a fly in fucking amber. You couldn’t do this. Not right now.

“And how does that feel?” Jeff said, the question directed at you. “Hearing Rafe call your relationship a mistake? What’s that like for you? Do you feel it’s a fair representation of the relationship you had with him?”

You paused for a moment, looking towards the ground and then back up, a fake smile turning your lips upward. “Well, I’ve known Rafe more or less my whole life. He had a real temper on him when we were younger. So, it’s nowhere near the worst thing that Rafe has called me,” you said. “And besides, he can call me whatever he wants. It’s his right—we live in a free country, right? Whatever. I’m sure that there are things that I’d call him too if I thought it’d make me feel better.”

“And what are those?” Jeff asked, eager to hear some rebuttal from you, clearly.

“Nah. I’m not doing that,” you dismissed. “I feel no need to say that shit. It’s useless.”

Drug addict. Cokehead. Alcoholic. Asshole. Entitled. Liar. Petty. Mean. Fucking mistake. Those were just a few of the descriptors that came to mind.

“Alright. Let’s move on then,” Jeff said, neatly moving the conversation away from you, looking at the girl who had pulled you to her side in a show of support and was still. “Valeria, I see you here with your arm wrapped around her. Supporting her when you met her less than a few hours ago, really. In a show of support that, sometimes, we don’t even see from our own contestants. You hear her ex-boyfriend say something you deem hurtful and you immediately step in to be kind to her. That’s something that I doubt just anyone would do. Clearly, you’re a person who cares deeply about others. What’s it like to see Patrick, a man you loved, in a situation like this where he’s putting love and attention into others?”

“Well, Jeff. I just think it’s a shitty thing to do. You don’t talk about people you loved like that. Not if you really loved them. Because if you and your new girl or whatever are gonna gang up on her that’s fucked. So I’m gonna step in. As for Pat? He’s always been a very…free-spirited person with his affections. That was never gonna change. So…I sincerely hope he can find some form of happiness,” the girl said easily, the words falling off her tongue while she continued rubbing your back.

The conversation portion with the whole cohort of participants felt fucking endless considering you knew it would take up less than ten minutes of an episode. But, eventually, it mercifully was coming to an end. You could tell Jeff was winding it down, wrapping it up, and ready to move on. But, then he hit you with a curve ball.

“Now, for the true purpose of today: communication. You’ve all matched up for this week. You and your potential match are going to sit and spend two hours with your exes. You’re all going to have a conversation getting to know each other,” Jeff said. “Spend some time actually getting to know each other. Talk about the problems that you had in your failed relationships. Talk about the things that worked. The things that you admired.” He gestured towards Rafe. “Or the things that you feel made the relationship a mistake. This is going to be a game changer in terms of figuring out if you’re a perfect match or not. We only have two couples that you haven’t locked in yet. Just two couples you assume are perfect matches, and even them we don’t know. So? Pay attention. This could be one of the last obstacles between you and one million dollars. After that? You’ll spend an hour talking to your ex. Alone. Try to have a meaningful conversation. Then? You’re going to spend the night, all of you, all of your exes, partying poolside. Take the time then to talk to other exes of people who might otherwise be your perfect match. Make it a good night.”

Your blood felt like it had turned to ice in your veins. You had to spend an hour talking to her and to him. Well, at least you’d have Alex with you, you supposed. But, it still was terrible. This felt, frankly, like a heinous punishment that you didn’t deserve. You forced yourself to appear unmoved.

“I know we’re all excited,” Jeff said. He clapped his hands. “So let’s do this. Let’s split you all up.”

The director called cut then, and the atmosphere changed. Only slightly. The participants all relaxed marginally, posture loosening. But, the exes all remained tense. Valeria rubbed your shoulders next to you. “You okay?” she asked. “That was shitty to say.”

“I’m good,” you said, nodding. You gave her a weak smile. “Thank you though. It was super nice of you. I appreciate it.”

She nodded. “I meant what I said. No one deserves that,” she said. “Good luck with your conversations. They both seem real fucking peachy keen to be around.”

You bit back a laugh but Alex, evidently listening, didn’t bother. He laughed openly. “Yeah. Definitely gonna be a fun few hours for us for sure,” he agreed. He winked at you then. “Promise I’ll try to not fight your boy, gorgeous. But if he runs his mouth like that, I’m gonna shut him up.” He playfully tapped your chin, tilting your head up for a second. “And do shut Thalia’s shit down. She has no right to be talking. And I know she’ll just be running her fucking mouth.” You nodded jerkily, not wanting to even comment on it.

Eventually, you were all ripped apart. You were given a brief rundown of the hour and how long you’d actually have cameras on you, where they’d be, hard conversational limits, and everything in between. They set it up so that you’d be in a room with only cameras set up, not operated by cameramen. It would just be you four. God fucking help you all.

“It’s gonna be fine,” Alex said, trying to offer some form of comfort, his hands folded across his chest as he sat back on one of the couches. Rafe and Thalia were about to be brought in and you both were stressed in different ways. And all you could think about was the cameras set up around the room, recording every last piece of this.

You simply nodded, unable to speak. You felt in your bones that this was going to be absolutely fucking awful. But you’d play nice. You’d pretend you didn’t want to scream. You were surprised, however, when Thalia and Rafe entered the room. Thalia walked in, with a smile on her face, and plopped down on the couch across from Alex and you, throwing her feet up with ease. Rafe followed behind, sitting next to her, letting her practically lay over him.

It was gonna be a long fucking two hours.

An even longer night after that.

Fuck, this was a mistake.

“What the fuck are you two doing here?” she demanded.

You didn’t even flinch at her harsh tone. You were working extraordinarily hard to not react with malice to her stupid words or her earlier actions. It was honestly hard. The silence on your part seemed to only serve to anger her more. You didn’t react to her anger and instead stared blankly at her. Alex, next to you, clenched and released his jaw, openly rolling his eyes at her.

“You really don’t get what’s going on here, do you?” she asked rudely. Still, you offered no response and she shook her head disdainfully at you and Alex. “I really don’t care what you and Rafe are or what you do today. You don’t mean shit to me. And at the end of the day? I know where his priorities are now. One day wouldn’t change that.” You tilted your head, still looking at her as if watching paint dry. “You’re not gonna fuck up a million dollars for the people in this house.”

Unable to help it, Alex barked out a laugh. “Fuck, they get Jeff in as a host and suddenly you think this shit actually is Survivor, huh? Fucking crazy,” he said, rolling his eyes. “None of the exes give a fuck about the people you’re with. Or your stupid ass game or any of you, actually.”

Thalia smirked at that. Your hands twitched with the urge to strike her, but you stifled it. “Oh, I definitely believe that,” she cooed, mocking.

“Thals,” Rafe said, sounding tired.

“Baby,” she said immediately, voice fake and innocent. You wanted to scream. Rafe said nothing further. Thalia set her eyes on you then. Her eyes were hard and calculating. “You especially. No one wants you here.”

You leaned back, folding your legs in front of yourself. You crossed your arms and drummed your fingers against your arm. “In what world do you think that I care what you want?” you asked dryly.

Thalia scoffed. “You’re such a cold, heartless, inconsiderate bitch,” she spat.

“Wow, those words mean so much from someone who doesn’t know me at all,” you said, rolling your eyes. “Aren’t you supposed to be filling some stupid little challenge now so you can try to get a million dollars for everyone in this house who probably doesn’t need it?”

“You’re just mad that you,” she tried.

“That’s where I’ll stop you,” you drawled, leaning sharply forward. “Shut the fuck up. You sure run your mouth a lot for someone who I am sure is just desperate to be painted as a victim when the editors go through and make their little arts and crafts project with their footage. And that’s all fine and well and good. Really, sweetie, oh I’ll be rooting for you. I will. But, here’s the thing. My emotions? My life? All that? Not for fucking you. And not for a fucking camera.” You gave her a cold smirk, leaning back again. “Far be it from me to make your boyfriend’s mistake worse, right? So you keep your fucking hands to yourself and you stop running your mouth like you’re hard and we won’t have a fucking problem tonight. Then? We never have to see each other again.”

“This is so fucked,” Alex said. He cleared his throat, eyes leveling on Rafe, interrupting the conversation between you and Thalia. “So, you a cheater too just like her, bro? Or are you just gonna be the next guy she tosses aside?”

Rafe’s jaw clenched. “Don’t fucking talk to me,” he warned.

Alex cut his eyes over to you. “See that’s why I said I’d drag your fucking ex, gorgeous. Because this guy? Something ‘bout his face just…pisses me the fuck off.”

“Don’t you fucking dare,” Thalia snapped.

“Thalia,” Rafe said, voice sharp. “Don’t make this harder.”

“Oh?” Thalia demanded, rounding on him. “Is this hard for you?” She was sneering at him now in a way that set your teeth on edge. Something about the way she spoke to him reminded you of Rafe’s dad. And suddenly this match made you feel physically ill in a completely different way than it had before. You looked away, hand clenching around your knees. “Well, I’m just so sorry about that, Rafe. How dare I have emotions! I really must be the issue, huh!”

You glanced over at Alex. “She talk to you like that a lot?” you asked him bluntly.

“She don’t know how to talk without being a bitch,” Alex said icily. “And evidently that hasn’t changed.” You bit your tongue to keep from saying well then neither has Rafe’s self-esteem or trauma responses. Alex snapped his head back over to the other pair. “Hey, good to know you haven’t learned how to talk to someone else if you’re so highly evolved Thalia.”

That, for whatever reason, seemed to set off the volatile girl more than she already had been. She looked about ready to launch herself at Alex. Seeming to recognize this, Rafe grabbed her arm gently as if to refocus her. It was something that he’d done to you a fair few times when you’d been together and someone had done something particularly aggravating and you needed to calm down. This proved to be a…bad move. Thalia did indeed refocus. All of her rage onto Rafe, that is. The second that you saw her slap him, though? It was your turn to see white.

You weren’t fully connected to your body as you moved, reacting to the sight. You were on your feet, physically dragging her by her stupidly long hair off of Rafe and throwing her away from him. She seemed stunned that you’d done that. She then seemed pissed you’d done that. So, naturally, her stupid self tried to rush you. Again, you pushed her back, getting closer and closer to being willing to actually hurt her.

“You wanna fucking run that again, princess?” you demanded icily. “Try to hit me, bitch. I’ll fucking hit back I promise you that.” You got closer, glowering at her, practically eye to eye. “You been fucking throwing hands at him? I know that wasn’t the first fucking time? You get off on this shit?” It had been easy to spot the punch she tried to throw. It was even easier still to deflect the punch shoving her far harder. “Try that again and I’m gonna fucking lay your ass out so help me fucking God.”

“Thalia.”

This time the word came from Alex. The word was flat and unimpressed. A quick glance over at him showed a largely disappointed look on his face. And somehow, seeing that seemed to be enough to force Thalia to get a fucking grip. She stopped, slumping back and sulked, walking over to sit down next to Alex. You watched, genuinely disgusted, as she laid her head against Alex’s shoulder and he let her. And when she burst into ugly, blubbering tears you weren’t surprised, but you were angry.

You clenched and unclenched your first three times trying to will yourself to relax some. But, nothing was working. You took a deep breath once…another…another…and another ten times still before you were able to look over at Rafe. He sat there, face pale and eyes cast down. You moved on auto-pilot, the kind of thing that used to be second nature and innate but now felt more…disjointed…forced. You laid your hand softly on his wrist so he’d notice it before moving your hand up to his shoulder. You squeezed it in a pattern of three and his head slowly moved up. He looked at you, dazed and you didn’t know if you were more angry or sad for him, really.

“Stand up,” you said quietly. He looked confused. You clarified. “You’re not staying in this room with that fucking lunatic. And Rafe…I swear to God don’t fucking argue with me on that. You’re lucky I didn’t break her fucking nose. Let’s go.”

Seemingly in a daze, he rose. You cast a look over towards Alex as Rafe followed like a shadow over to the door. You glared at the other man and he gave a half-hearted frown of apology as if he’d expected something like this to happen. That didn’t make anything better. So, you simply shook your head and turned again. You yanked the door open and let Rafe walk out first, face still drawn. You shut the door quietly behind yourself and laid your hand gently on his bicep before gesturing him down the hall. We found not a producer or even an assistant first but instead, Jeff fucking Probst who looked startled to see us.

“You’re supposed to be,” he began.

“I’m supposed to be beating a bitch’s ass for putting her fucking hands on him like some little—” you cut yourself off. You cleared your throat. “Sorry. Forgive me. Thalia fucking hit him. Doesn’t seem like it’s the first time. So if I were you? I’d go ahead and get her the fuck out of here before I call my dad who works in entertainment law and let him tear this piss-poor production apart. And feel free to tell production I said that.”

Jeff winced. “I understand,” he said. He looked at Rafe. “I’m…I’m terribly sorry that happened. That hasn’t happened before as far as I’ve been told. There are mental health staff in the bungalow attached to the house. Go there. I’ll explain everything. Some people will stop by to talk later though, I’m sure.”

“Good,” you replied sharply in place of Rafe who still wasn’t speaking.

Following Jeff’s advice, you shepherded Rafe towards that bungalow where a kind woman gestured you two in before leaving to go get some…paperwork? Who the fuck knew? Who the fuck cared? You looked over at Rafe who was still silent, face pinched. It wasn’t hard to see his leg slightly shaking and the jittering of his hands.

“I hate knowing that wasn’t the first time and that you’d deny it to protect her,” you said bitterly. “Rafe you don’t know her. And you deserve better than that. Just like you always have.”

“I don’t,” he said, his voice coming out short and quiet. “I don’t deserve anything good.”

You pursed your lips and shook your head. “Thought we’d moved past the self-deprecating bullshit,” you commented. “My mistake.” You sighed. “Rafe…your family and friends all love you still. Even now. So don’t waste…your heart on shit like this. Fuck this show. You can afford to break whatever contract you had. Hell, my dad could find a loophole and sue for you I guarantee it. But you…you can’t stay here. You…you deserve good things. And that? That…person...who they’re trying to call your perfect match?” He stayed silent. “You got matched with her because fundamentally you still find yourself in the same place that your dad wanted you to be. You think that you owe everything to everyone else and don’t want to take responsibility or…ownership over anything. For fuck’s sake, Rafe. Do you really want her to be your spokesperson? You want anyone like her to be your spokesperson?” You shook your head vehemently. “You are so much better than that. I don’t…I don’t know if you can see it. I don’t care if you can see it. But it’s true. You threw away a year of sobriety and years of building real self-confidence and not your fake bravado bullshit for this?”

“No you don’t understand,” Rafe said. “I am sober. And I didn’t want–”

The door to the bungalow opened and the woman bustled in, hands absolutely full of stuff. You rose to your feet before the woman even had to open her mouth to tell you to leave. “Cast only,” she said anyway, uselessly.

“Yeah, right,” you said dryly.

“Wait…where are you going?” Rafe asked, face breaking open into vulnerability for a moment.

“Home,” you said shortly. “Worst vacation…ever.” He looked hopelessly confused at that news. “You should call my dad, Rafe. Like now. You are not supposed to go through this shit alone. You know he’ll help you. You have his number.”

“I can’t…they…I don’t have my phone,” Rafe muttered, looking away from you.

Your eyes darkened. “Fuck’s sake these people,” you muttered. You took your phone from your pocket and called your dad before the woman across you could say a word. You gave your dad a curt explanation and he said he’d be in Hawaii in ten hours before briefly chewing you out for not saying where you were going beforehand.

“You can’t leave,” the woman said. “We need to—”

“Don’t care, didn’t ask, go through my fucking lawyer,” you said sharply, handing her your father’s business card. You glanced at Rafe. “He’ll be here in ten hours. Most likely super pissed. So…he’ll raise hell for you.”

“Are you…” Rafe trailed off. You raised an eyebrow. “Will you…stay?”

Your heart shattered and healed and shattered again in an ugly, impossible sort of way. “I…” you tried, trailing off immediately. “You…” Still no luck. Eventually, you were able to settle on, “I need to leave. I need to go home. I…I can’t fucking be here. I can’t see…this. I can’t hear…whatever you’re gonna tell my dad. I can’t see whatever footage he’s gonna have them dredge up. I need to go. Home.” You looked at him, letting out a shaky breath. “And you should consider doing the same thing. As soon as humanly possible.”

Your name spilled from his lips and it sounded so right and so wrong in that moment. “I…I’m…” he tried, voice breaking.

“No,” you denied, giving him a bitter smile. “Don’t. I don’t…I don’t want to hear it, Rafe. I really don’t. I wasn’t going to see someone hurt you. I never have. I never will. But facts are facts right?” His face fell, knowing what you meant. “And I’m a mistake. Let’s not drag it out any longer, right?” You shook your head. “Good luck, Rafe. I…wish nothing but the best for you.”

“I didn’t…” Rafe tried. “I can explain.”

“No,” you denied, holding a hand up. “I can’t do this. Not here. Not now. I’m…done with this. With all of this. Truly.” You let out a devastated-sounding, sad sort of sigh and offered an obviously fake tiny smile. “Just let me know when my dad gets here—you know he’ll forget to.” He went to speak and you held up a hand. “He’ll get your phone back if these psychos don’t give it to you by then.”

“I will,” he said immediately in reply, a sad, almost puppy-dog-like look in his eyes.

You sighed, biting back the urge to cry or scream…or anything else really. “You know what? Never mind. Call Topper. I…just…just let him know. He’ll tell me,” you said, voice going numb.

“Wait,” Rafe said, his voice shaky. “I…I want to tell you.”

“Rafe…please,” you said, giving him your best pleading look and more than willing to beg him if it meant he’d give you a break.

“I…okay. I…I’m sorry,” he said, frowning, looking genuinely remorseful.

As you started to leave, rage somehow carrying you as the influx of adrenaline faded, your name fell from Rafe’s mouth once more. You turned your head to look at him, silent and waiting. It took a few moments for him to crack. The time lingered, settling into crevices of yourself that long seemed gone—abandoned and disappeared with Rafe’s own missing presence. Yes, this was too hard already and the situation had just made it impossible.

“Get home safe,” he said, his voice breaking.

You let out a bitter laugh turning back around and heading out, refusing to turn your head. You knew that if you were to look back you’d cave immediately. And you couldn’t do that.

“You too, Rafe,” you offered blandly.

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[wildbornsiren]

Kinktober Day 20: Double Penetration || Jake “Hangman” Seresin/F!Reader/Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw [The Game part 2]

Double Penetration (Two Holes) Summary: Following the events of your night with Jake and Bradley, the three of you try something new.  2304/5,654 words Jake “Hangman” Seresin/Female AFAB Reader/ Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw Warning: EXPLICIT MINORS DNI: unprotected vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, anal fingering, anal sex, partner sharing (pre-polyamorous relationship), established partner sharing  Notes: For #kinktober2022.  Please follow @wbslibrary​ since tag lists are gone. (I appreciate ya’ll so much but it was stressing me out, and I was worried I’d miss someone). Thank you so much to @therebeccaw​ for the beautiful moodboard/header.  Comments and sharing let me know you love me, likes are appreciated. Thank you so very much for reading. It’s so appreciated and means the most.                                           ||Part One||

The gray sky, paired with the peal of thunder and near constant downpour of rain, made for a lazy Saturday afternoon. There’s a movie on the television screen, you’re stretched out on the couch, your head in Jake’s lap, your feet resting on Bradley’s thighs. Bradley’s warm hand rubbed gently at your calf, Jake’s fingers trailing up and down your arm, a bowl of popcorn balanced on your stomach, occasionally tossing pieces into your mouth.

It had started slowly after the night Jake had fucked you—and stayed. He’d drop by on Saturday nights, which eventually bled into him staying over and leaving Sunday night. Midweek pizza and beer nights extended into having Jake stay after he’d had one too many. Then it was a toothbrush, a pair of sweats, extra combat boots—another go bag left by the door right by Bradley’s. It wasn’t without growing pains, the two men would often snipe at each other, or measure metaphorical dicks on the counter. But it worked, no matter how tenuous. Bradley’s touch continued up your calf, fingers brushing over your knee to your thigh. You stretch your legs out more, and he chuckles softly. Jake’s touch had stopped, his hand moving from your arm to gently grope your chest through your shirt. There’s a moment of hesitation, before his hand dips under the neckline of your baggy sweatshirt, fingertips tracing the swell of your breast. “I thought you two wanted to watch this.” Jake’s hand eases under the lace of your bra. “We did.” “Found something we’d rather watch honey.” Bradley chimed in. “This morning wasn’t enough of a show for you?” You arch an eyebrow when both chuckle. It’s a dangerous thing when they get along—more so than when they fight. “We had something in mind for this afternoon if we’re being honest.” Jake said. “A double feature of sorts.” Your heart skips a beat, seeing the heated look pass between the two of them, before their gazes landed on you. “I’m listening.” Bradley licks his lips, “You think you can take both of us honey? At the same time?” You had had them one after each other, one while the other watched, but this? This was something you wanted but hadn’t had the courage to bring up to them. “I’d like to try.” Bradley squeezes your knee, his thumb smoothing over it gently. “Here, hold this.” You hand the bowl of popcorn to Jake, who moves his hand to hold the bowl with both. You roll off the couch, twisting out of your sweatshirt and start walking back to the bedroom in your bra and pj pants. You can’t help the grin when there’s two sets of heavy footprints following you down the hallway. Jake reaches you first, hand closing around your wrist, tugging you to him, mouth landing on yours. One hand keeps a hold of your hand, the other at the small of your back. His tongue parts your lips easily, and you groan into the kiss, wrapping yourself around him as much as you can.

Bradley’s touch skims up your back, unhooking the closure of your bra and easing the straps down your shoulders. His moustache tickles your back as he kisses down your spine, gently tugging your sweats down. Warm, soft kisses as he sinks to his knees, one hand sliding between your legs, teasing you through your panties. He peels the flimsy fabric down your legs and holds you steady as you kick them aside. “I’m feeling underdressed here.” You mutter, fingers gripping Jake’s hair, his mouth on your neck. “Don’t worry about it, honey.” Bradley murmurs, kissing his way up your thigh. His fingers drag slowly through your folds, toying with your pussy. “Let us take care of you.”

 Jake rumbles, agreeing with him, a calloused thumb rubbing circles over your clit when two of Bradley’s fingers eased into you. “That’s it, darlin’.” Jake nearly purrs, his teeth nipping at the column of your throat. “You’re so good for us.” There was that word again, us. You had thought about what the two of them together would be like, and their ministrations had already far surpassed late night fantasies.

 “Listen to that darlin’, how wet you are for us.” Jake is nuzzling at your neck, sucking soft spots against your skin. “Wouldn’t take much to have you soakin’ my face, would it?” He jerks, pulling away from your neck to look down. Bradley’s other hand had landed on his leg, dragging up his calf. You watch breathless, seeing the flush rise on Jake’s cheeks, not moving away from the touch, biting his lower lip when skilled fingers slide further up his leg, blunt nails scraping his thigh. “Take his shorts off sweetheart.” Bradley murmurs against your hip. “Touch him for me.” You blink, getting lost in the sound of Bradley’s words and Jake’s soft moan. Your hands find the waistband of Jake’s shorts shoving them down his legs. His cock is hard and heavy, and Jake whimpers when you wrap your fingers around the thick length. Bradley moans against your skin and the sound goes straight to your cunt, tightening around his fingers. Jake’s head drops to your shoulder, his hips rocking into your hand. You whine softly when Bradley’s fingers slide from your cunt, missing the feeling of being full. He stands, pulling you back against him, taking your weight, and Jake’s who is now slumped against you. Jake’s whimpering and moaning against your shoulder, the blush spreading from his cheeks to his neck, his chest so hot against yours. “Look at me.” Bradley says. You tip your head back the same time Jake lifts his head. Bradley’s index and middle finger push past parted lips, and Jake closes his mouth around them, sucking them clean of your arousal. Bradley kisses you, and your knees nearly give out, trapped between them. Jake fucking frantically into your hand, and the slow grind of Bradley’s hips against yours. “He’s almost as pretty as you, sweetheart.” “He is.” You manage to whisper out. “Need you. Need you both.” “Jake, if she rides you are you going to come as soon as you’re buried in our girl’s pussy?” The other man snickers, letting Bradley’s fingers drop from his mouth, nipping at his fingertips. “You think you can handle taking that perfect ass?” Jake gropes roughly at your rear. “Boys….” Jake steps away, kicking his shorts to the side, chucking his t-shirt across the room. He stretches out on the bed, propped up on the mountain of pillows you insisted on when both moved in. He leans over long enough to rummage in the bedside table, tossing a bottle to Bradley who catches it. Jake beckons you toward the bed, and you crawl up and over him. “Hi,” You kiss the tip of his nose. His hands are so gentle as he maps your body, fingertips committing every curve to memory. Jake’s smile is genuine, soft, the corner of his eyes crinkling, one hand smoothing up your back, resting at the back of your neck, pulling you in for a kiss. “Hi yourself, gorgeous.” That sweet southern accent makes your stomach flip, paired with the gentle brush of his lips against yours. “I still can’t believe I get to touch you like this. Don’t want to close my eyes.” He kisses the corner of your mouth. “Because I know when I open them again, I’ll be awake.” “Jake,” you start, the bed dipping slightly when Bradley joins the two of you. “We want you here.” Bradley says softly. He’s looking slightly to the left of the two of you. He’s naked, all golden skin and long limbs stretched out on the comforter. He gently nudges your shoulder, and you sit back, resting on Jake’s thighs. Two fingers tip Jake’s head toward him. There’s a moment of hesitation, both standing at the line in the sand, unsure of who was going to cross it first. Bradley’s thumb brushes Jake’s jaw, before he’s leaning in, closing the distance between them. You’re not sure who moans first, but the sound was sinful. Jake’s hand cups Bradley’s cheek, fingers moving to tangle in dark brown curls. His cock twitches against his stomach, moaning when Bradley’s tongue slides past his lips, deepening the kiss. Carefully, you shift your weight, sinking down onto Jake’s cock, whimpering at the stretch. You keep still, hands gently brushing over Jake’s torso. “Fuck,” Jake tips his head back against the pillows. “Fuck.” He covers his face with his hands, chest rising and falling harshly. “Give me a second.” You feel him twitch buried inside of you, and it takes everything you have not to rise and start moving, wanting to see what sorts of sounds you could draw from the overwhelmed man. Bradley is wide eyed and panting softly, eyes dark when he crushes his mouth against yours. He takes, and takes, his hand gripping the back of your neck. He bites your lower lip and pulls before he’s panting harshly against your mouth. He whispers your name, and you kiss him again, softer, trying to ground him. Bradley trembles softly against you, moving to drape himself on your back, strong arms circling you your waist, pulling you back against his chest. Jake groans under you, the movement causing delicious friction between the two of you. Two sets of hands move over your body, touch chasing touch, soft sounds spilling from your mouth. “Jake, Jake, can I?” “Please darlin’, it’s alright, it’s alright.” His hands settle on your hips, thumbs tracing over the soft skin. His voice is rough, words slurred, watching you through heavily lidded eyes when you start to move. Your fingers curl against his abdomen, nails scraping softly. “Lean forward,” Bradley whispers, teeth catching the shell of your ear playfully. You can hear the lube cap flipping open and you shiver. “Keep your eyes on him, let him watch how good it feels when I open you up.” Jake shifts under you, helping you adjust. “You’re so go good for us darlin’.” He grips one of your hands, fingers lacing, bringing your joined hands to his mouth, kissing your knuckles. You will yourself to exhale, hips moving against Jake’s riding him slow. Slick fingers grope at your ass, a stream of cool lube hitting heated skin. Bradley teases a finger at the tight ring of muscle, rubbing slow circles, easing the digit in when your body starts to relax. It’s slow, practiced, begging for more by the time he adds a second finger, slowly scissoring them to stretch you further. Your arms give out, collapsing against Jake, mouthing at his shoulder, hips still moving, grinding against him as his cock fucks into you. Breathlessly babbling nonsense against Jake’s chest, cheek rubbing against his chest hair, when a third finger enters you. You’re rocking back against both—Bradley’s fingers, Jake’s cock, needing more, needing the burn of Bradley’s cock as well. “Easy sweetheart, easy,” Bradley murmurs when he’s slicking his cock with lube. “We’ve got you.” Jake stills under you, holding you closer to his body when Bradley places a hand between your shoulder blades, pinning you against the other man. You’re certain you’ve never made the noise that is torn from your throat when Bradley thrusts his cock into your ass. Jake’s hips roll up, and he groans. “Fuck I can feel him.” You nod wordlessly, fingers finding purchase on Jake’s shoulders, gripping tight. Neither man moves, you can feel Jake’s heart thundering under your ear, Bradley’s harsh panting. Every nerve is singing, alive, electric, just on the line of being uncomfortable. “With us darlin’?” Jake murmurs softly. You nod, licking your lips before managing a quiet “Yes.” “That’s our girl,” Jake says, kissing your temple. They work together, as if they’ve fucked you together for years. One push, the other pull, gentle kisses, touches bringing you higher. You’d never been this full, their voices blending, pet names and praise whispered against your ear, your shoulder, pressed to your lips in sloppy kisses. There’s nothing but them, this moment, the pleasure spiraling tighter in your belly, snapping when Jake moans your name. You come for them, hands white knuckled gripping the blankets, fucking faster, harder against the two desperate to continue the rush of endorphins and need that’s coursing through you. Bradley follows quickly after, driving his hips flush against your ass. You can feel him spill into you, his groan echoing against your back. Jake pulls you toward him for another kiss, panting against your lips when he comes buried in you. “Breathe,” Jake kisses you softly again, once the three of you remember how lungs work. “He’s going to pull out darlin’.” Gentle hands lift your hips, moving you to the bed. Bradley’s already in the bathroom, you can hear a bath being drawn. Jake has rolled off the bed, pulling his shorts back on, wrapping you up in a fuzzy robe—Bradley’s from the size and color. He sits on the edge of the bed, water bottle from the nightstand in hand, helping you drink. Bradley emerges from the bathroom in a cloud of lavender mint scented steam. “You want me to carry you, or do you want to try to walk?” He’s got a pair of sweats on, and one of Jake’s t-shirts stretched tight across his chest. “Please,” you say holding your arms up to him. He lifts you, holding you close to him. “We may have to find a place with a bigger tub, there’s no way two of us, let alone three will fit in what we’ve got.” You smile against Bradley’s chest, burrowing against the solid warmth. “That’s—that’s a couple conversations we can have over breakfast.” Jake says quietly. “But they’re ones I’d like to have.”

#wbskink #kinktober2022 #Jake Hangman Seresin/reader/Bradley Rooster Bradshaw #shelly writes #Jake 'Hangman' Seresin/Reader/Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw #Jake 'Hangman' Seresin/you/Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw #Jake 'Hangman' Seresin #Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw #Top gun maverick fanfiction

[toskasrph]

hey guys! sorry to drop this on the dash, but i'm in a slight pickle. my job is going to be closing for a few days due to a major gas leak. i'll be losing out on about $150 in wages due to the closure. so to try to make up for it i'm opening up an emergency commission call.

i can do the following kinds of graphics : icon borders, dash icons, post headers (ex: headcanon, prompt, etc), post dividers, mobile banners, and pinned headers. examples can be found at my ko-fi shop.

i'll be off for the next four days minimum. if you are interested, please contact me directly.

#signal boost

[allamericansbitch]

Hi everyone! Here’s the newest addition to my Creator Shoutout Series ( april 16  - april 23)! For info about the series, I explained it in the first post here, but generally, it’s to show appreciate to editors and their creations that i love from the past week. To track this series or look at previous shoutouts, please check out the tag on my blog *creatorshoutouts. Have a great week everyone!

the last of us: joel miller gifset by @skyshipper

succession: kendall and stewy gifset by @stewy-hosseini

the last of us: joel and ellie gifset by @laufeysons

succession: stewy in 4x04 gifset by @shesnake

taylor swift: tied together with a smile graphic by @beachsread

anya taylor joy: birthday gifset by @userdanewhitman

the last of us: ellie and joel gifset by @schemingkaz

daisy jones & the six: daisy and billy gifset by @greatcometcas

succession: willa in 4x04 gifset by @ladyhawke

abbott elementary: jacob hill gifset by @bellamysgriffin

the last of us: joel miller gifset by @arthurpendragonns

stranger things: destiny choice chance gifset by @kitconnor

the last of us: joel saving ellie gifset by @rogerhealey

taylor swift: you’re on your own kid gifset by @loversmore

paramore: hard times anniversary gifset by @paramores

the last of us: joel & his daughters gifset by @tomshiddles

taylor swift: eras tour headers by @lavenderhazes

boygenius: me & my dog / letter to an old poet graphic by @cruellesummer​

the last of us: ellie swearing by @trashcora

taylor swift: rain lyrics through the years gifset by @mrperfectlyfinetv

knives out gifset by @kitherondale

yellowjackets + art parallels edit by @everythingeverywhereallatonce

taylor swift: midnight rain graphic by @piecesintoplaces

succession: roman roy gifset by @rasputinaillyanna​

barry: 4x01 4x02 gifset by @lousolversons

taylor swift: lyric parallel edit by @thisisustrying

yellowjackets: most new jersey gifset by @natscatorccio

taylor swift: you’re on your own kid graphic by @gofightwin

yellowjackets: 2x05 gifset by @thesoldiersminute

taylor swift: debut redesign edit by @mrperfectlyfinetv

assorted musicians + flower symbolisms gifset by @antoniosvivaldi

taylor swift: the roaring twenties gifset by @cametotheshowinsd

stranger things: text posts gifset by @lamberts

heartstopper: nick nelson gifset by @birthdaysentiment

taylor swift: anti-hero graphic by @anervousmirrorball

nope (2022) gifset by @nickoffermen

yellowjackets: natalie in 2x05 gifset by @loveexpelrevolt

taylor swift: closure headers by @your-closure

parks and recreation: ben and leslie gifset by @trueloveistreacherous

taylor swift: eras tour - florida night 1 gifset by @newromantics

the last of us: horror/apocalypse tropes gifset by @dadjoelmiller

stranger things: hawkins video gifset by @bitchsteve

taylor swift: eras tour outfit graphic by @amycurtismarchs

stranger things: mike wheeler in episode 7 gifset by @bylrndgm

taylor swift: reputation redesign edit by @newromantics-tv

succession: you first gifset by @arthurpendragonns​

halsey: hopeless fountain kingdom gifset by @comeinwiththerain

taylor swift: tim mcgraw gifset by @wespers

the last of us: art parallels gifset by @fkevin073​

heartstopper: season 1 gifset by @thatwasthenightthingschanged

taylor swift: wonderland graphic by @h-f-k​

#*creatorshoutouts

[rumorsfromine]

can you make closure headers in black background with red (a bit of white) text pls?? ^_^

closure defense squad!

please like/reblog if you save

#taylor swift headers #evermore headers

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 08/07/2023

I've won, but at what cost

Season 6 Featured on: SiIvaGunner's Highest Quality Rips: Volume FF

Ripped by eg_9371

Requested by @undertale-vs-fortnite-who-wins

Season 6 of SiIvaGunner is immensely interesting to look back on, as it sort of carries an air of melancholy throughout. Though it had its fair share of average SiIva events, it was a season that, perhaps as a sheer coincidence, both began and ended with very important farewells. The Season's ending is a story for another time. Today, we're here to mourn the loss of GilvaSunner, the channel that arguably laid the groundwork for VGM on YouTube as a whole.

As I'm sure many are aware, GilvaSunner - thats with an L, not an uppercase i - was one of the leading channels for accessing video game music on YouTube, particularly from Nintendo music, in the 2010s and late 2000s. The channel's branding, thumbnails, description and mission statement of providing quality above all else were all things adopted by SiIvaGunner, both to help sell the original idea of impersonation whilst also building on it as a form of parody. The two existed in harmony, with GilvaSunner mostly inactive and SiIvaGunner existing as a giant tribute to video game music on the site as a whole. Through an increasingly heated copyright battle between himself and Nintendo, the channel admin of GilvaSunner was eventually forced to close the channel down, officially commencing on the 4th of February 2022. With him, a giant archive of video game music was lost, alongside all the voices and comments that had once occupied each and every upload. It didn't matter that the content that was lost wasn't original: In a way, an entire community was lost that day.

On the day of GilvaSunner's deletion, the entire SiivaGunner channel paid its respects through an event. The event posted several dozen rips in just one day, with per-game batches uploaded simultaneously to mirror the upload schedule of the original channel. In the end, it was all capped off with rips from Tengami: the very game that GilvaSunner and SiIvaGunner's header image is sourced form.

As the event's final rip, I've won, but at what cost (known otherwise as Loneliness - Tengami on the YouTube channel) holds that melancholy feeling more than any other that day. The rip initially appears to be the typical SiIva melodyswap medley, only it doesn't swap to any of SiIva's own themes. Super Smash Bros. Brawl, Mario Kart 64's Rainbow Road, Super Mario Galaxy, Mother 3: The track throughout all its melodyswaps celebrates everything that the original GilvaSunner channel itself loved, what its most remembered uploads were, and gives them an exceptionally emotional touch through the source track. Its only at the very end that Snow Halation from Love Live is added to close the theme out, as the visuals and song both fade.

Divorced from its original context in Love Live, Snow Halation on SiIvaGunner has to me always held weight as a theme of hope and revival, as the theme that originally brought SiIvaGunner out of the Reboot in Season 1. Arguably, its the theme most emblematic of the passion found in SiIva audience, from its initial hatedom to the wave of people now woefully attached to it - myself included. In mourning Gilva's closure and moving on throughout the 6th season of SiIva, Snow Halation playing here feels like a passing of the torch - as a reminder that, though we've lost one, the passion and spark of the SiIvaGunner channel refuses to ever let it die.

A cherry blossom falls

Death's embrace

A new beginning

#todays siivagunner #season 6 #siivagunner #siiva #eg_9371 #gilvasunner #gilva #vgm #nintendo #tengami #Bandcamp

[callsign-phoenix]

This is the final part to this Press Play AU I wrote.

It is a Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd x female!reader imagine.

Thank you so much to @lt-natrace for the gorgeous header and proofreading!

Warnings: angst

When you called Phoenix to ask how Bob had died, she reacted equally confused as Hangman had.

She took a few minutes to ask if you were alright but eventually you got a reply out of her, a death that had nothing to do with flying and that seemed to show you how inevitable Bob’s death really was.

He suffered a stroke at 28 that brought him to the hospital and killed him in the end, something that held so much finality that you needed a second to come to terms with it.

You had done all you could to get him away from accidents that could ensue, but it didn’t seem to work.

You were left heartbroken and lonely in your bed, having lived through more action in the last few hours than the entire year you took to grieve your loss.

You were trembling again when you picked up the last picture you had taken together.

You remembered the day you took it, the moment at the dock to say goodbye, but instead of that you found a picture of a smiling Bob at the beach.

It sent a shock through you at the fear that you didn’t even remember taking the picture, but it made sense because Bob promised not to fly anymore, therefore he wouldn’t go on the mission.

Bob had taken you to the beach on more than one occasion, so you hoped that that was enough to take you back.

You were half wishing it wouldn’t work, because you were so scared to never see him again after it, but you knew that you needed closure.

“Where do you want to go tonight for dinner?” You heard Bob’s voice ask you, and you felt his breath ghost over your ear.

Bob was sitting on a towel in the sand with you between his legs, his arms wrapped around you and his thumb gently stroking the skin of your outer thigh.

He said your name when you didn’t answer and despite your best efforts you began to cry again.

Bob didn’t know what was going on but you were sure he caught up quickly as his arms held you more tightly and he buried his head in your neck, pressing gentle kisses to your skin.

“It’s okay, it’s fine, you’ll be alright,” he whispered over and over again, but you shook your head vehemently as you held onto his forearms.

“I don’t… I can’t do this,” you exclaimed, turning around to look at him.

Bob looked so sad as he watched you, his damp hair from a swim in the ocean darker than usual, just like his entire mood.

There was a second of sheer broken silence before he spoke up, taking his time to set a hand to the side of your face.

“Listen baby,” he said intently, making sure you were looking at him.

“You’ll be alright. I’ve come to terms with it and we’ve done what we could to try and stop it, I think it’s out of our hands now,” he said as the sobs shook your body in reply.

Bob pulled you closer to kiss your forehead, his lips lingering there as if he was the one who needed to savour the feeling.

“Baby, you’re going to be alright,” he said again, stroking over your hair as he held you.

“No, Bob, please,” you whispered, your tears still streaming over your face in sadness and also in fear.

“This is the last picture we took. This is my last time to see you again,” you said, pulling away to look into his eyes again.

His glasses were slightly askew on his face but it almost made you smile, you didn’t move to correct them like you used to.

You could see fear in his eyes for only a second before he managed to hide it from you again, the way his thumb brushed over your cheek giving the two of you much needed comfort.

Your hand moved to his hair and cheek as you mirrored his actions, trying to remember the feeling of his skin on yours.

“It’s okay, you’ll be okay, I love you,” Bob repeated over and over again, until you couldn’t hear him anymore.

Alone in your bed you cried yourself to an endless circle of sleep and fearful waking, just motionlessly lying in your bed.

The next few days felt like the very first ones after his accident had.

You didn’t have the energy to do anything and only when your stomach hurt badly did you manage to get up and relieve your bladder.

It was a pain you felt in your body and your soul, not even Phoenix who stopped by and dropped everything to take care of you could help you.

She managed to relocate you to the couch in your living room with a handful of blankets and some ice cream, the only thing she managed to make you eat.

She stayed for a few days even though you knew you were painful to look at and deal with, and you were endlessly grateful to her.

You had left the box you deemed empty open on your bed, and Phoenix finally decided on trying to make you feel something again.

You were once again staring blankly in front of you when she approached you, sitting down at the edge of the couch and handing you a small photograph encased in a white frame.

The familiarity of the polaroid in your hands forced you awake again and you looked at Phoenix before you had the courage to see what picture it was.

“I found this at the bottom of the box, below the camera. I thought maybe it could help,” she said softly as she gave you a smile and took her leave.

You were once again alone with a photograph of you and Bob, but not one you had taken yourself.

When you glanced down you saw the two of you smiling back at you, drinks in hand on the very first night you ever met.

You had been at a birthday party of one of your friends when you met Bob, who was as shy as ever.

He knew the host barely while his friend Natasha was good friends with her as well, and she had forced him to come to get out more.

It had been a ploy to get him laid but you knew it had done far more than that.

Studying the picture you found his number scribbled below, which he had put there in the hope that you would find it and call him, which you had.

The picture was taken very randomly, with Bob and you barely having exchanged a word, but your friend was drunk and ‘found the two of you cute’ so she had played matchmaker.

The force of the memory took all the heaviness from your body and a smile took over, and you didn’t even realise you were back at the party until a shy and careful Bob broke your daydreaming.

“So… what do you do?” He asked you the most mundane question you could ever ask to get to know one another, but the way he studied you so intently made it so much more than that.

You had realised something over the course of the last memories you had revisited, you knew that no matter how much you tried, as long as Bob got to know you in this moment he’d end up dead one way or another.

It made your decision easier as you smiled at him, shaking your head.

“I’m sorry, I have to go,” you told him softly and he nodded, not being able to hide the disappointment in his eyes.

epilogue:

It took everything in you to walk away from Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd that day at the party, but you couldn’t regret doing so for even a second.

No matter how much you missed him, the knowledge that he was alive and well was all you needed to start a life that was becoming worth living again.

You did your best to live your life without Bob or the other aviators you had grown fond of, it was the easiest way to stay away from Bob.

Years went by but there was not a single person that came even remotely close to the feelings you had for Bob.

You had tried dating once or twice but none of your partners were what you were looking for, so you had given that up.

Instead you focused on your life and your own happiness, finding hobbies and the perfect job for you.

Every once in a while the feelings of longing and loneliness came back though, but you tried not to give into it.

You tried to do mundane things just like going grocery shopping to keep in touch with people and not get lost in the comfort of your bed.

You were doing exactly that when you met Robert Floyd again.

Having finished shopping you found yourself at the checkout counter, just loading your groceries onto the conveyer belt when your eyes caught on a familiar face beside you.

You almost jumped as you saw Bob in line after you, politely smiling back at you when he caught you staring.

It took you a moment to realise that he was actually standing behind you, that you didn’t just imagine him, but when you did your heart jumped and your heart rate picked up.

You were nervous, you didn’t even hear anything the cashier said as a white noise raged in your ears.

You were on autopilot as you paid and rushed to pack your groceries in bags.

You were at the trunk of your car, storing away what you had purchased when a voice you had missed for years spoke up behind you.

A shiver raced up and down your spine and you closed your eyes for a second, cherishing the sound.

“I’m sorry, I think you forgot this,” Bob said behind you, and you slowly turned around.

You didn’t know if he remembered you, in his eyes you had only met briefly at a party and you had shot him down.

The moment you looked into his eyes you knew that if he asked you out again you wouldn’t be able to say no.

Your staring seemed to amuse him as he chuckled and glanced down at the pint of ice cream he was holding out towards you.

You took it from him quickly, your heart still racing, especially when your fingers brushed his.

“Thank you,” you mumbled as you carefully placed it into the cooler you stored the others in.

You were hesitant to turn around again, but you did so.

“You’re welcome,” he answered you, a smile playing around the corners of his mouth.

The two of you were silently looking at each other, neither one of you wanting to leave.

“This sounds both cheesy and presumptuous, but do I know you?” He asked, and you shrugged in response.

You were going to deny it when Bob interrupted you, a smile spreading on his face.

“You were at Laura’s party a few years ago!” He answered his own question, and all you could do was smile at him.

The way he so carefully shifted on his feet, not knowing if he was bothering you and the way his eyes rushed over your body to make out what you were feeling made your eyelids flutter slightly at the memory of him.

“I just… I’m sorry we didn’t get to talk much that day, but would you want to go out sometime?” He asked you, swallowing harshly as he went on.

“I… this might sound really weird but remember her taking pictures that day? She took a picture of us before you had to go, I should still have that,” he told you.

You were surprised by that but it also sent what you could only describe as butterflies through your stomach.

“I can’t explain it either, I’m sorry, that sounds really creepy,” he apologised, but you quickly shook your head.

“No, it’s not creepy,” you answered him, reaching behind you to pull your phone out of your back pocket.

“And yes, I’d love to go out with you,” you answered him, receiving that warm smile you had ached for for so long.

You didn’t know what would happen next, but you were hopeful and willing to try.

tagging: @wildbornsiren @mayhem24-7forever @green-socks @hederasgarden @letsfvckingdance @shadeds-library @a-reader-and-a-writer @yespolkadotkitty @whateverbagman @neptunes-curse @sweetheartlizzie07 @top-gun-rooster @kyramaximoff @iloveprettyboysblog @ateliefloresdaprimavera @imjess-themess @littlebadariell @angstyjellybean @marchingicenotes7 @thelifeofthelifeofme @midget713 @dannyramirezwife @supernaturaldawning @gspenc @adorephina @gigisimsonmars @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @bespinnn @softromantist @malindacath @peaches-1999 @oliviah-25 @natasharomanoffisbaebby @luckyladycreator2 @blue-aconite @tipsykeen @airedale17 @iangiemae @aprilfire18 @uwiuwi @princessofglitterland @ycarlii @teti-menchon0604 @butaneandthebeast @call-sign-hurricane

(please tell me if you want to be added to the taglist, or use this link)

#robert bob floyd imagine #robert bob floyd fanfiction #robert bob floyd x you #robert bob floyd x reader #robert bob floyd #robert floyd x you #robert floyd #robert floyd x reader #bob top gun #top gun bob

[voyageofthenautilus]

Thank you, everyone!

This is Blue M. Hart, the creator of the Voyage of the Nautilus substack. Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Seas has been a very important book to me since I first read it at 12 years old. I’ve gotten “Mobilis In Mobili” tattooed on me, daydreamed endlessly about writing a film adaptation, and now I’ve just finished running an online book club for it. I can’t thank you all enough for participating and making this such a rewarding experience! It’s been so much fun following along with everyone’s reactions. I hope everyone reading along had as much of a blast as the person running the thing!

Thanks as well to my friend @plutodetective for inspiring me to make this project a reality, and for co-modding this very blog. Thanks to Orca_Super_Cool on Twitter for making the lovely header image and icons for this project- his commissions are currently open if you’re interested! Thanks to Project Gutenberg for making the text of Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Seas available and accessible, and finally, thanks to the Dracula Daily project for popularizing this “read a classic novel in real time via emails” format. Voyage of the Nautilus would not exist if Dracula Daily didn’t exist.

So, what’s next…?

Several readers have asked if I will run the Voyage of the Nautilus book club for a second year. Currently, the answer is no. As outlined earlier on this blog, midway through the project, I, a habitual fine-print skimmer, realized that the translation of Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Seas that I had used for the project was under copyright, and while I wanted to see the project through to the end, I’d rather not take the risk of using the copyrighted translation for a second time. The only public domain translation that I’m aware of is unfortunately abridged and rife with inaccuracies, therefore I’d rather not use it. (If you’d like to read this translation in a serial format, Notes from the Nautilus has got you covered!) That being said, I would love to run the book club again and have been searching for ways to contact the translator to see if he will allow us permission to use his work, so if it ends up happening again, watch this space.

For now, feel free to go back through the archives of the Voyage of the Nautilus blog to catch up on readers’ thoughts, as well as browse the wonderful fanworks made over the course of this project- both fanfic, and fanart. (Pluto made an excellent masterpost of these works for ease of browsing!)

You might also like to know that Jules Verne wrote Captain Nemo into another book of his! The Mysterious Island is a tale of several castaways who become marooned on a remote island following their flight to escape the American Civil War. To mention Nemo’s involvement in the plot would be to spoil it, but he does make a significant appearance (which is strangely portrayed as taking place after the events of Twenty Thousand Leagues, despite that story being set chronologically after the Civil War). If you enjoyed Twenty Thousand Leagues, but desire closure for Nemo’s character, The Mysterious Island provides that in spades. (Perhaps we’ll do a book club for it in the future…?)

That’s all (for now)!

-Blue

#voyage of the nautilus #announcement #i feel like i'm watching end credits scroll by

[wipbigbang]

The final round of art claims is open at @wipbigbang! We have all sorts of great stories left in multiple fandoms, and we'd love any type of fanart for them: traditional art, digital art, fanmixes, moodboards, fic covers/chapter headers...any kind of art you can imagine!

The synopses are located at https://wipbigbang.dreamwidth.org/173272.html

The form is located at https://forms.gle/yyxkCxyXJopMTyUs8.

Pacific Rim

#093

Title: If You Need Me

Pairing/Characters: Chuck Hansen/Raleigh Becket main pairing and characters, no other pairings mentioned, Mako Mori and Herc Hansen briefly show up, Yancy Becket and Tendo Choi are briefly mentioned

Rating Explicit | E

Warnings/Tags: No Warnings apply

Deals a little bit with survivor's guilt, and mentions of previous hallucinations (but not described in detail)

Summary: Chuck promised a worried and overworked Mako Mori that he’d watch over her unconscious copilot when she couldn’t be there. Some unexpected misunderstandings happen. Raleigh wakes to familiar injuries and the hallucination of a man not quite his friend. Is it his damaged brain trying to give him closure? Or is it something more? An unlikely friendship blossoms into something else.

Raleigh wakes up in the Shatterdome hospital after being unconscious for two weeks following the final fight to close the breach. He sees Chuck in his room, and not realizing Chuck survived, Raleigh assumes he's hallucinating. This assumption carries on until Raleigh is discharged and, overwhelmed with emotion, Raleigh asks Chuck to stay with him. They share a bed for a while, and then their relationship progresses from a friendly one to a romantic and sexual one.

#fandom event #wip big bang #fanart #art event #looking for fanart #signal boost #pacific rim #raleigh becket #chuck hansen #mako mori #herc hansen #yancy becket #tendo choi #chuck x raleigh #raleigh x chuck #queueue

[suburbanlegnd]

Your theme bestie😍😍🦋💜💜

Thank you! Of course credit for the amazing header goes to @your-closure 🖤

#asked

[umbralundertaker]

Something else dumb on the Jack track (howdy, I'm that anon who said Jack sucked on both the villain/redemption side of things, and your header inspired this thought): Its weird how some people were like "oh there's so much more potential in Jack living than Slick", and then the two things I've seen from people who didn't just ignore him were "he's a janitor/nobody that nobody cares about despite the fact that he's in history books as a mass murdering asshole" or "dollar store Slick".

...Man, am I glad I've never seen someone like that. All things comsidered, I'm pretty new to the Homestuck scene, so I never saw people say that.

But what in the hell makes people make up shit like this? The two Jacks have very little development (and I like it that way) but the one with more characterization you think deserves to die!? That doesn't make sense from both a lobotomized reader standpoint and a narratively conscious one. Jack dying would have given Collide more plot use than "the flash where condy dies". It could symbolize the old troubles being over and the betas moving into a new world without worrying about him. It could literally just be We Won Against The Big Bad Evil Guy. But it's none of em.

And Slick dying ughhh that speaks for itself. He never got to kill Lord English yeah sure, but he never even got to get closure with his crew, or even Karkat for gods sake. Imagine how hs2 would have played out if Slick lived! There are some opportunities there for sure, far more than Jack has just rotting in prison because his character has stagnated.

Both Jack and Slick are great examples of how to make a character an extremely valuable asset, but in different ways. Jack's usefulness had run out, but Slick still had hundreds of pages left in him before he kicked the metaphorical bucket.

Its disappointing. Not only the fact that it happened, but how few people seemed to care and realize the gravity of that choice. They either considered Jack and Slick to be the same, or somehow thought that Jack deserved to live more than Slick. Its just frustrating all around.

#Hometsuck #Jack noir #Spades slick

[purplejabberwock]

Hey, I‘m kind of a die hard DMW fan. Since I discovered them in 2021, your works have replaced Canon in my heart and I‘ve been much happier about the SP fandom since my friend recommended me your fics. I‘ve actually drawn some fan art on my Tumblr if you‘re interested, and last year for Christmas I (very clumsily) bound the first book for myself and 3 of my friends.

All that being said, I‘ve been dying to know if you‘re still planning on continuing the series eventually. I know you‘ve been busy IRL and I‘ve been trying not to get my hopes up, but it would really give me some closure/make my day to know.

You deserve the world for DMW and all that you and AmaraqWolf have already written in that verse, I‘ve never loved a fanfic that much before. You made me love characters that barely even existed in canon and DMW makes me feel safe while still being exciting and suspenseful. Just, thank you for writing.

Oh and if you would like to have the pdf I formatted for the books I‘d be happy to send it to you.

'Clumsily'. Those are gorgeous is what they are. I'm very glad you've taken them offline where you can't lose them, especially in such a lovely manner. Not that I remove my creative works, as a rule, but there's no quite telling what the Internet will do, so I always encourage people to make copies.

To answer your question: yes, I am still writing DMW. I've been thinking about it a lot lately. When I might, I dare not speculate, let alone promise. Sometimes the knowledge that people are waiting on it has its own dampening effect, so I'm slowly training myself not to be bothered by the expectation. (Don't feel bad about being hype, though. I'm a reader too. Sometimes you just Want.)

It's funny to me when people say 'I know you're busy irl' because honestly, writing *is* my irl. If I'm not writing one thing I'm writing another (or trying to figure out my shit so I get back to writing. Unpacking from the move comes under this header). The biggest competitor to my time is video games. And the need to work for income for shelter and sustenance, I GUESS.

There's a lot I want to write and each has their season, but the writing will always be there. The series is not over yet. Until it is, it will be there waiting for me. Hopefully that's as reassuring as I meant it to be.

#asked and answered #sp: dead men walking

[therisingphoenixden]

So, I was tagged by @mxkelsifer to do this quiz about why my OCs hurt. Kels, you know me so well as an angst gremlin! If you'd like to play along, feel free.

because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow - Verasi and Rassjan

mistakes come back to you like echoes in an empty cave. you have been trying since you started but does trying count? is trying good enough? every night it visits you, the pain that you have caused with your clumsy hands and venom-tongue. life careens onward, onward, with the moon hung in the sky and the sun the day after, but you walk backwards on this path so you can keep sight of what you did. the destruction still feels fresh. it still feels like fire, where you burned them. fire is supposed to be warm. it burned them, and it will swallow you. blow out the candle. let it rest. some things are better left behind in the dark.

First up, we have the double-header of Verasi and Rassjan, who have both made many, many mistakes on their journeys. In fact, Verasi's whole adventure in the Second Era came about precisely because they couldn't accept what happened during the end of the Third Era. They believe their mistakes - believing Azura, having a hand in killing those their past self was once close to - led to the destruction of Vvardenfell, so they ran. Rassjan, meanwhile, knowing what she knows now would have absolutely approached everything differently - starting from her early days as a conjurer in the Adventurer's Guild - to save who she could. Her own ignorance regarding the reality of the world and the goal of her foes was, in her eyes, her biggest mistake. One she would see rectified if she could. Pandaemonium gave her a taste of the closure she sought, but it wasn't nearly enough to wash away the stains of her mistakes.

you're choking on how much you have to try - Khorijin

you have tried. you have carried the weight of the world on your shoulders and accepted more responsibilities than you have ever wanted, even intended to gain. it isn't crushing - you are strong enough to hold it - but you are choking. you don't know what to do with it. you don't know where it goes, how to move this weight everyone knows you can hold onto, and do you even want to get rid of it? Never. You would not give this to - force this on - anyone else. but you /can't/. but you are choking on it. your body will hold it up even when you lose all the air in your lungs, and your footing, and your courage. it does not mind choking you. it seems almost designed to do so. if you weren't wrung out you wouldn't be doing this thing properly.

Poor Khorijin has Been Through It since she left the Steppe in search of adventure. She wanted to put her bow to use for the betterment of the world instead of just her tribe. Instead, she found the fate of the world placed upon her shoulders many, many times. It doesn't feel like a burden, really, and she wears it well. But her time on the First changed her, and not just physically. Her scales were never mottled before. Both eyes were once the same color. She's killed former friends in the name of saving the world. Now she's staring down the barrel of a madman who would bring the Final Days back to the world. She bears her burdens well, but that doesn't mean they won't crush her under the weight in the end.

this isn't enough for you - Breya

the words creep into your head in the dead of night one night and you cannot get rid of them. 'this isn't enough for me anymore'. you thought this was enough for you at some point, or maybe you hoped that it would be, but it isn't, and it hurts. you need to change something, or die trying. this - life like this - does not make life worth living. there is a lump in your throat that demands attention every waking moment of the day. there is pain in your body like a cavernous maw you cannot keep balance over. this is not what you wanted. you need to change. you can't stay here. it is not a character flaw you want more.

Now for the youngest of my OCs, Breya, who is following the standard rpg trope and is 17 as of the start of Shadowbringers (I do not perceive the time bubble). I don't think this actually fits her. Yes, she wanted to adventure and save the world after witnessing the Calamity at age nine. She took up a bow and left Ul'dah for Gridania, wound up fighting the Garlean Empire at age 14, fought to end the Dragonsong War at 15, and aided in the liberation of Doma and Ala Mhigo at 16. She's now on a whole other world, traveling and exploring while trying to figure out how to save it. But like I said, I don't think this result fits her well. She would be more afraid of all of her past mistakes coming back to bite her, as seen with Ilberd and the Crystal Braves, or not being enough of a hero. She felt like enough of a failure during Stormblood.

#tag game: uquiz edition #oc: verasi ferein #oc: rassjan horas #oc: khorijin iriq #oc: breya wells

[pastelroyce]

Before I Go, Let Me Say This

My part of the N7 Exchange event for queenofthejungle on Ao3. They had a lot of top tier ship suggestions but I was in the mood for mshenko (rather, when am I not in the mood?) with suggestions of angst and two dudes in love. This was my take on that!

Title: Before I Go, Let Me Say This

Summary: Shepard is on his way to the Omega-4 relay, but finds himself thinking about Kaidan and Horizon.

Words: 1,397

Rated: T (language)

Relationship: Male Shepard/Kaidan Alenko

Additional tags: light angst, angst with feels

Also available on Ao3

.

Commander Shepard was approximately 5 hours away from what could possibly be the last mission of his (second) life, yet in that moment replying to a damn letter was proving to be a more monumental task. The blinking cursor on his open message terminal mocked him from his position on the bed. Another screen behind it blocked out the rooftop view port of the Normandy, the letter Kaidan sent after their encounter on Horizon.

When he read the header for the first time his heart seized, petrified into a heavy weight, plummeted into the depths of his gut and lightened into a flutter all in the span of two seconds. It took one day to open the message and another three days to read it in full. Shepard read the letter over, and over, and over again until he could read it in his sleep–which he had in a dream a few nights ago.

Horizon was a mess. Horizon was an absolute cluster fuck of a premeditated mess that Shepard didn't think he'd ever forgive The Illusive Man for putting Kaidan and the colonists through. Horizon was what fully cemented the idea that Shepard was dead for two fucking years and all of its subsequent consequences, all of the possible ways it resonated with everyone he knew.

Of course Kaidan would be the first to apologize.

As Shepard read the message–at that point it became less reading and more scanning for important points–he could still hear Kaidan in the back of his head.

"You turned your back on everything we believed in! You betrayed the Alliance, you betrayed me!"

"I loved you. Thinking you were dead tore me apart. How could you put me through that?!"

"You've changed, but I know where my loyalties lie."

His words stung but after, once heads were cooler and Horizon was in another system, they weren't unreasonable.

Shepard had been the unreasonable one.

"I can see you won't listen to reason."

"The Alliance is going to blame Cerberus, just like you did."

"You saw what happened here!"

He definitely didn't feel like he walked away from that one on top.

Shepard wanted to write back, say he was also sorry and that he still loved Kaidan, maybe even more than before. The words never formed correctly, never deemed fitting for everything Shepard felt; the fifteen drafted letters saved in his terminal was proof enough.

Four and a half hours away from the Omega-4 relay.

With a resounding sigh, Shepard pushed himself off his bed and dragged his feet to the work desk. Maybe laying in bed was the problem; after all, his most productive report writing was done at that desk so logically he should be able to write the letter there no problem. What happened, instead, was that all Shepard could think about was Kaidan back on Horizon.

“Why didn’t you try to contact me? Why didn’t you let me know you were alive?!”

At the three hour mark that fucking cursor kept blinking on the still blank screen.

Fuck it.

If the mission did go FUBAR, if there really was a chance he wouldn't see the other side, he needed closure. Real closure and not a letter he'd forget about later. With a deep breath and a prayer he dialed up Kaidan's omni-tool.

"Commander Alenko speaking." That seemed too fast, too ready but Shepard could ruminate on that later. His heart leapt into his throat leaving his vision blurry and mind just a little gone. Kaidan repeated himself, his voice seemed too far away.

"Got your message," was what came out, low and hesitant. Shepard could have sworn he heard Kaidan gasp.

It was Kaidan's turn to go silent save for some rustling in the background and an automated door sliding. Shepard stood up in the meantime.

"John," came Kaidan's voice again, "it's…"

"Just," the longer they floundered, the less Shepard felt sure about what he was doing, "hear me out, okay? Two minutes."

A deep inhale came from Kaidan’s end but he quickly gave an okay. The floor was Shepard’s. For a split second he wished he had actually planned the call, rehearsed for maybe even a second because suddenly the words were just gone. Son of a bitch…

“John?”

"I," Shepard dragged a hand over his shaved head, "I'm…also sorry. About what happened."

"John-"

"I mean it.” When in doubt, spill your guts. “Sure I got angry, and for a while I felt like I was justified in that anger but shit Kaidan, how else do you cope with the fact you've been dead for two years?!"

"I was able to do it…"

Oh.

"Shit, shit, shit, I'm sorry. I didn't-"

"I know.” Kaidan’s voice was terse, like he was speaking through his teeth. Shepard could picture it perfectly in his head, the way Kaidan’s brow was probably pinched and how hard he must be trying to not frown. Their time on the SR-1 gave Shepard time to discover Kaidan’s tells.

“I need to backpedal. Uhh, another two minutes?”

“It’s been nearly ten minutes now.”

Has it?

Shepard checked the chronometer on his omni-tool. Sure enough the call was fast approaching the ten minute mark, and almost two and a half hours until they hit the Omega-4 relay. When did making a call get so difficult?

Well, shit.

“Anyway, Kaidan, I am sorry. I’m sorry for the way I acted on Horizon, but there’s something I want you to know,” he leaned against the fish tank, “if I had it my way, you would have been the first person I’d have gone after. Part of why it took a fucking invasion of a backwater colony to see you was partly due to being stonewalled in the beginning. Then circumstances came into play, and my current mission took priority, and…,” Shepard let his eyes follow the motions of a couple of jellyfish floating in the tank, “I just…had no idea how to approach you.”

Kaidan sighed. “Higher ups wanted me to investigate Cerberus, probably because our time hunting them gave me some credibility. You and I saw the limits their scientists were willing to go, but total resurrection?

When I first heard the rumors of you being alive, I refused to believe them, but…there was another part of me that hoped you would have tried to find me. God knows I did.” As Kaidan spoke his voice got lower so that by the end it was little more than a raspy whisper. “When I got approved for the mission on Horizon I knew Anderson would keep a tight lip about it.”

“Yeah. Wouldn’t even tell me.”

“Can you blame him? Could you imagine how mind boggling it is to see someone–someone who was dead for two years–back to life and working for known terrorists? The same terrorists you killed along with them?”

Just when Shepard felt he could breathe in, Kaidan spoke up again.

“Also, you didn’t know how to approach me? What is that supposed to mean?”

“Because, once again, I was dead for two years! What if you had moved on? What if you-”

“I could never.”

The certainty in Kaidan’s voice stopped Shepard dead in his tracks.

“I tried to but I couldn’t. I loved you John, and maybe I still do. You’re still the only one who can make me feel human.” Kaidan’s voice sounded heavy at that and Shepard felt his chest tighten along with him. God damn it.

“I love you too.”

Two hours and fifteen minutes until the Omega-4 relay. Shepard swallowed.

“Kaidan,” Kaidan doesn’t answer verbally, instead gives a small ‘hmm?’, “when I’m done with this mission I swear I’ll get back to you, no matter what.” Was it an empty promise? Maybe, but Shepard knew he would be kicking himself later if he didn’t say anything. As much as his drive revoked around saving the galaxy, Kaidan was in the galaxy, so it only made sense to make him a priority. Get in, beat collector ass, get out, see Kaidan. No ship in known existence had ever made it back out of the relay; something Shepard was determined to fight tooth and nail to change. The impossible seemed less daunting with the thought of seeing Kaidan at the end of everything.

“Yeah,” Kaidan said back, “I’ll be looking forward to that.”

#mass effect #commander shepard #kaidan alenko #mshenko #john shepard #pastel fics