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miraculouspaon · 4 years

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@dragon-robot asked for my “top 5 chapters/oneshots you’ve written” and I’m happy to oblige!

1. 36. Prisoner Oh-Three-Eight (Where Have All The Heroes Gone And Where Are All The Gods?)

“Putting aside for the moment,” Eight interrupted, trying to keep her voice down, “that you think getting over the fence faster than the guards can catch you will be easy, why? You just got out of a week of solitary! Can’t you keep your goddamn head down for a second? Besides, what’s the point? You’re just as much of a prisoner on this side of the fence as that one, trust me.”

“The point,” Six said, “is they stole everything from us. Everything. Our memories, our freedom, our lives. And we’re probably going to die in this hell without ever knowing why. So before that happens,” he took a deep breath and looked Eight straight in the eyes, his green ones suddenly brighter and more focused than Eight had ever seen them, “before that happens I am making one happy memory, just one happy memory that they can’t take away from me.”

How could my top chapter have been anything else? I wrote a 166k fic, the longest fic of my life, and I wrote the entire thing around this fucking chapter. I’m so proud of it, guys. Marinette and Adrien, stripped of their memories and separated by a fence, falling in love all over again in this hopeless place, uggggh, it’s perfect.

2. Chéile Séala

“No mortal should fall in love with a fae,” Niamh said sadly. “We never bring your kind anything but sadness in the end.”

Nathalie looked into Niamh’s eyes. They were light, as though she'd wept the color right out of them. “I suppose it's not really optional,” Nathalie whispered. “Falling in love.”

Niamh blinked. “No,” she agreed, meeting Nathalie’s gaze, “not for my kind, either.”

Fucking selkies, man, who doesn’t love them? It’s the perfect myth for Mama Agreste, and once I realized the story needed to be MamaNath it pretty much wrote itself.

3. 7. The Damsel (Your Princess is in Another Castle)

“Ma'am, I am really gonna have to ask you to leave my partner alone.”

“Oh, but we have so much in common,” Adele said mockingly. “We’re both from Paris, we’re both-well, I'm not a superhero anymore, but I used to be, we…” Adele trailed off before narrowing her eyes yet again at Marinette. “Wait. A superhero from Paris… do you have a Miraculous?” Again, there was no need to wait for Marinette to give any response. “And you came here? Well, I certainly hope you people know what you’re doing, because if I just spent four years in captivity in order to keep my Miraculous away from Henrik only for you to come along with and hand him another one, I am going to be extremely put out. Which one do you have, anyway? Fox? Bee? Too much to hope you found mine, I suppose… good Lord, you don’t have one of the big ones, do you? Jesus, you do. Do you have any idea what kind of damage Henrik could do with a major Miraculous? I rejected mine because with it he could have taken over the world in a week, with yours it probably wouldn’t even take him until the end of the day, and you-”

“Oh my God,” Marinette exclaimed, finally snapping, “I cannot believe I have been listening to everyone singing your praises nonstop for like a month now, you are the most annoying person I have ever met in my life.”

Look I’m gonna try my best not to make every entry from Generations but it’ll be hard because Generations is easily my best writing, hands down. I love every second of this chapter. I love Marinette awkwardly infiltrating a cult to rescue her crush’s mom, and I love that said mom just gives her, like, the hardest time imaginable for her trouble out of sheer pettiness. I love showing that side of Adele, as opposed to the weak victim or the perfect saint of a mom/heroine, I love playing with characters acting on incomplete information, and I love Marinette snapping right back at her. And of course, this chapter also has Gabriel and Adele’s reunion after four years and ugh, my heart.

4. 9. An Unexpected Reunion (No Happily Ever Afters)

“This is starting to get to inconvenient for all of us, don't you think? It was merely a small annoyance when your family wouldn't stop pestering our friends at the police station-those sorts of misunderstandings can be so easily righted, after all. But now they're sending in,” Hector paused and looked Jonathan up and down again, “whatever he’s supposed to be. Why not just clear everything up before this escalates and somebody gets hurt? Sign the contract, explain to everyone that you work for us now and there are no hard feelings, and we can all get back to our regular lives.”

“Hector, I have six weeks to finalize a syllabus for an advanced course on the reign of Louis X. I do not have time for this. Incidentally, it wouldn't kill you to learn a bit about the man yourself, he had some interesting things to say on the subject of forcing men to do jobs they have no interest in doing. What do they call that, again? Right, slavery. He was against it. Something of a controversial stance in 1315, but nowadays it's a bit more-”

“How dare you,” Hector interrupted, his face turning red. “You should be thanking me for this opportunity. If your great-uncle hadn't served this family well for so many decades, I wouldn't even begin to entertain the notion of making such a generous offer to some half-breed maricón nobody like you. One more slight like that and I won't hesitate to-”

“What's he saying?” Jonathan interrupted in French.

“I'm not translating it,” Ferd replied angrily.

“Why not?”

“One, I don't care to repeat some of the more colorful insults. And two, it is a very run-of-the-mill villain monologue. I assume you've delivered enough of those yourself that you can figure out the gist on your own.”

Shut up, Generations is my baby. Anyway, there was exactly 0% odds this list wasn’t going to have a Ferdithan chapter on it. By all rights, Ferdithan shouldn’t have any fans whatsoever, it’s a Hawkmoth/OC pairing where Hawkmoth is also functionally an OC. But to my endless shock and joy, readers love these nerds. This chapter in particular is great because we get to see the 1000% Done version of Ferd, and when he’s fed-up he defaults to Snarky Historian and I love him.

5. Imogene

Gabriel blinked, momentarily taken aback at his wife’s flat tone. “I meant, do you remember that one night? You woke me up, hours after everyone else at the resort had fallen asleep. You led me back to the shore. We were so in love, and you were so excited to be…” Gabriel trailed off. “Don’t you remember?”

Emilie frowned. She knew they’d gone to the Bahamas for their honeymoon. She knew it had been magical. She knew it had been the trip of a lifetime. And yet… she knew it the way she knew that the Earth was round, or that water froze at zero degrees Celsius. She knew it like it was a fact she couldn’t remember learning. Her memories of the trip were just vague, shallow impressions. She didn’t remember the night Gabriel was talking about at all.

“Don’t worry about it, my love,” Gabriel said quickly, seeing that his question had upset Emilie. “It was a long time ago. It doesn’t matter.”

“Of course our honeymoon matters, Gabriel,” Emilie whispered. Gabriel wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. “I think I came back wrong.”

Sometimes I think my best writing is permanently behind me, that my heyday was a few years ago and I’ll never write anything good again...and then, Imogene. It’s so good, guys, it’s everything it was in my head and more. It was stuck there for a while, actually, because originally my idea was a lot angstier and Imogene died at the end, either because permanent sentimonsters were unstable or because her continued existence was draining Nathalie’s life force due to the damage of the Miraculous and she snapped her own amok in a blaze of self-sacrifice. Then Feast established that sentimonsters could live for centuries, then the Miraculous got fixed at the end of S3, and I kept trying to make it work until I realized I was just killing her off because her existence was inconvenient for the main characters. But so what? Isn’t it more interesting for everyone to have to deal with it, to acknowledge her personhood? It drives me mad when characters die for no reason other than to make things easier, and here I was doing the same thing without even realizing there could be another story, a better story.

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trans-gothic · 7 years

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Day 204: Things Get Damaged, Things Get Broken (People Don’t)

Get it? Ha ha.

I have been struggling with my depression a lot lately. But it’s weird because, like, I will feel like I’m doing much better and like my life is picking up but then it jumps on me all at once (or allatonce, to channel e e cummings).

I’ve seen the new IT six times now. I think it might be kind of like how I will get depressed and just put on Silence Of The Lambs as I go to sleep every night for a month sometimes.

I’m not drunk. I wish I was but I am not. I couldn’t tell you for sure why I am sticking to that. It might be just to spite my mother for calling me an alcoholic.

Do you remember like a year ago when I wrote a post with a title that went something like “supplementing pills with booze”? I really think that the alcohol was actually helping with the shortcomings of my sadbrainmeds (cummings again) and sleeping pills. It made me numb from some of this when it didn’t give it a megaphone.

I decided not to structure this coherently. I want it to convey how my head is right now so it is stream of consciousness or whatevs.

Yesterday I went out to the movies with my friend Kathy. I know I’ve talked about her before, and I know that I’ve written about her before and I knowthat (not editing either) she reads this (hi Kathy). To catch up: She is a coworker, since my “promotion” (HATEHATEHATEHATE new job) I am technically her boss. We have an admitted mutual sexual interest in each other. She is married and older than my mother. She is very pretty. Last week I helped her order a vibrator off the internet and she tried it out right there in my car. She gave me the panties she was wearing that day. I don’t think I’m handling all this as a purely sexual thing? I dunno. Who knows. Not me. Fuck if I know.

I told her the other day that on the vibrator day I was strongly tempted to try to kiss her. She said to just tell her the next time I felt that way and see how she felt about it. Even before yesterday I knew that this was probably a bad idea and would not go anywhere useful good (imagine “useful” poorly erased and good scrawled messily over it). The basic gist was... “How does this end well for me?” She’s married and straight. So even if somehow we do end up together then it’s got a rapidly ticking timer as I move further from male (hahaha GOOD LUCK EVER GETTING THAT DONE YOU FUCK, YOU WILL NEVER GET WHERE YOU WANT). Even supposing THAT were to work out somehow... Fi, honey, she’s 25 years older than you. Remember her problems with her husband being 13 years older? Yeah. REMEMBER THAT.

So yesterday I gave her a box of candies (that melted because it is way too goddamn hot here right now) and we went to the movies and I was kind of ignoring that “there’s no way that this ends well for you” and was probably going to try to kiss her after the movie, but then she got a call from her husband and that just threw me back to where I’d been the night before. I talked to another friend about it, and today at lunch I talked with Kathy about it, and all three of us are in agreement;. THe fuck are you doing here, Fi? There is no happy ending here. There is no good ending. This does not end well for you.

I know I say this a lot but I’m worried about my body. I’m worried that I will always be as disgustingly masculine as I am right now.

I don’t know how often the average person fantasizes about dying, but it’s probably less often than I do by a large margin.

As previously stated I am struggling a lot with my depression right now. It’s like, it doesn’t even necessarily feel like things are so bad, but it feels like there is something within my head that is broken and rotting. It’s like I have these times when it feels like I am happy and everything has come through but then that just quickly fades out and the stars go out one by one and all is black. Melodramatic maybe, but phrasing it like that stops it from being “HATEHATEHATEDIEYOUHAVETODIESOONYOUFUCKINGBROKEBRAIN[word removed but it starts with T and ends with Y, 4 letters in between]WRETCHCREATURETHINGHAAAATE”.

So I was thinking today, like, when was the last time that I think I felt truly Happy. Like okay Fi, regroup, you’re not going anywhere good now what direction where were you when you were last generally in a good place. And, like, it was an easy answer. It was when I was hanging out with Piranha and getting wasted all the goddamn time. It was shitty and I had bad nights but I generally liked where I was or maybe I’m just telling myself that?

My head literally hurts from how bad I feel.

On the thirteenth, I was out presenting as female and a complete stranger came up and told me he was going to snap my neck, then laughed as he walked away. So hey, if I don’t just completely self-destruct at some point down the line then there’s a good chance that someone will do it for me. Ha ha. Get it?

I feel stuck in my horrible job because I need it so that I can maybe actually get to be a girl at some point.

I meant to talk about this earlier but (I feel much calmer now) I’ve been thinking a lot tonight about how old I am. I’m twenty goddamn eight years old. I’m still years from anything resembling being able to be myself or have the right body or how the FUCK can you ever even explain what it is? From being able to be a girl. Woman, I guess, really. I’ll never get to be a girl. I never got to be young, and I never will. I had some example for what I meant by this the other day and I have been wracking my brain to come up with what that was.

On my birthday, I went out presenting as female for the first time, with Piranha and Emily. It was an amazing night. I worry that I will never be that happy again (I worry that I will never be happy again; I worry that I will only ever feel like this for the rest of my life). When I got nervous as we were waiting for our table at the sushi bar, we went to the car and Piranha and I snuck some liquor and Em smoked some wax. It was great. It was at the Brea Mall, which was the first place I went on the day that I called out of work to (you only were able to make yourself do this because you got drunk and forced your sober self’s hand) force myself to actually make the call and schedule my first HRT appointment. So now it is a place where I can be male or female. It is a liminal space and I am trying to kind of slowly expand what places are such liminal spaces for me.

But of course the 13th was a good reminder that I am gambling with my life every time I do. I know some of you will think that is dramatic, but that’s okay. Maybe I am. But it certainly undermined the feeling that I am safe doing that.

I have pepper spray now.

“We’ve changed” say the voices from the drain before the blood splatters into Beverley’s face.

There was such an effortless joy to that night, my birthday.

I was thinking about the lyrics to “True Trans Soul Rebel” again earlier and wondering if I would have been married by now if I were a normal fucking human being cis.

I know that I put way too much emphasis on having a romantic relationship, intimate companionship and all that. But that is something that my brain is constantly fucking screaming at me about.

The wild and howling desperation of a band like Mayem (circa Live In Leipzig, of course).

I really, truly am worried that I will never experience a positive emotion again.

#diary #depression #depressed #trans #lgbt

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altitude-times · 5 years

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Les Chèvres de Montagne

Yo Kelsey! Merci d’avoir accepté de participer à cette interview. I’ve been following Les Chèvres de Montagne for quite some time on Instagram and honestly, I love seeing girls encouraging girls to get out there and beyond their comfort zone. It’s super inspiring. Since when are you part of the group? How did you come to know the group? You mentioned you have a friend who’s a founder?

Hey Noémie, thanks for the interest in Les Chèvres de Montagne! I am thrilled to get to answer some questions for you and hopefully inspire you or other ladies to get out and be a part of the community. I've been a part of Les Chevres de Montagne for the last few summers with this summer being my third year coaching the mountain bike program in Les Estries. I was very fortunate when I first arrived in Quebec because the majority of the ladies I knew were also lovers of the outdoors. Coming from BC, this was heaven-sent! Pascale was a good friend of mine and one of the founders of the group so as the things expanded, we all did our part to be involved. There is a core group of ladies in Les Estries, and a lot of them are a part of Les Chevres in some way whether it be as a coach, nutritionist, chiropractor, event coordinator and more! The gist of the group was to create a community for women who loved the outdoors and wanted to participate in activities with other ladies. Whether you're a veteran at the sport you love or you simply want to try something new, the events are catered to be enjoyed by ladies of all skill levels, and that's what's so amazing about it. Plus! You meet so many new friends that you're never alone for your weekend adventures. I was stoked when I was first asked to help with the coaching. There's nothing more rewarding than watching the progression of the ladies over the few weeks you have with them.

According to you, how does going out between girls change the dynamics? Personally, I'm delighted to see girls playing in the mud instead of making Youtube videos about contouring. Sludge is a different kind of skin foundation. (ahah!)

The vibe is really special at all of the events. All the girls are encouraging each other and if they haven't signed up with a friend or two, they certainly leave with two or more new friends. Since I started with Les Chevres de Montagne, the number of ladies in my lady crew I can reach out to for weekend adventures has quadrupled, and that's something really cool. Everyone shares a common passion for the outdoors, and I agree, seeing this many ladies stoked on having fun outside rain or shine is pretty damn cool if you ask me.

What sports do you personally prefer? I guess it’s probably cycling, am I right?

Hahah you are correct! I come from a mountain bike background having raced downhill for six years before retiring at 18 due to too many head injuries. Since then, I spent three years coaching in Whistler Bike Park and a month in the Yukon coaching Army Cadets for the Federal Government. It's been a wild ride, but I couldn't see my life without mountain biking in it, so I love riding for fun nowadays and coaching on the side. Aside from that, I grew up skiing but recently switched over to snowboarding, I enjoy hiking and camping (if you can call it a sport) and try my best at fishing on the weekends.

Can you tell us a bit about an anecdote, something funny that happened or something truly memorable?

Because the majority of the girls participating are French, it's always a bit of a joke that I coach in English because they get an English lesson at the same time. For their entertainment, I'll throw in some phrases in French or attempt to explain my teaching anecdotes in French which always creates a few laughs. As for anecdotes, the cowboy gorilla stance which I learned from one of my coaches still gets people giggling. It sounds silly, but it really works! I've been using it with the kids I have coached as well as adults. That, and the chicken-wing, Superman. Another golden one I took from my time learning with the fantastic instructors at Endless Biking in North Vancouver.

What’s the longest trip you’ve experienced with them? A weekend? A few days? What was the biggest challenge?

For the past two summers that I have coached with Les Chevres de Montagne, we do a weekend at Vallees Bras du Nord, so I generally will arrive the Friday night and stay until Sunday. There are some epic multi-day adventures such as a survival camp over the winter and multi-day hikes, but so far that's the longest event I've done with the group. The biggest challenge, hmm that's tough. I think the biggest challenge for a weekend of coaching like that is just reserving enough energy to get through the weekend. After a long week at work, the drive there, a weekend of coaching and then the trip back, it can be a lot, but hey, it's hard to turn down an epic weekend of riding with such a fun group of women. Last year, we got to choose one of the two days to coach and had a free day to ride. This was fantastic because how often do you get your full lady crew out together to shred some new trail?! Another tough challenge is having to head home after having so much fun of course!

You mentioned that you were involved as a mountain bike teacher. Can you tell us more about that?

You betcha! So the first year I coached, I was the head coach and the one I organizing the lesson plan for the beginner group, the intermediate group as well as my group of advanced riders. My second year, last summer, I coached the beginners. Both seasons were a blast, but personally, I kind of enjoyed the beginners a bit more because you got to watch the ladies confidence absolutely flourish over the six weeks. That's not to say the advanced riders didn't as well, but it was just such an enlightening feeling to watch the new riders' faces light up when they tackled a new trail they were so fearful of before. This is probably the best part of coaching, watching someone realize their potential and then turn into an absolute shredder. Everyone starts somewhere, and it's so refreshing to get to be a part of that process.

During my years of racing, I worked with numerous different coaches who all had their different ways of coaching. Everyone learns a bit differently so having those different techniques to work with is always great.

How do you plan your food for these occasions? Any delicious recipe you’d like to share?

We have our lovely Emilie who is the nutritionist for Les Chèvres de Montagne and plans the meals. Everything is taken care of for the participants for all meals from morning to after dinner snack (we make some mean s' mores cones!). We generally go for simple, hands-on meals where everyone can more or less serve themselves family style. This also depends on the size of the group but last year, we had amazing tacos that of course had the group stoke leve very high! Emilie is great at creating vegetarian-friendly menus with gluten-free options as well. As for the best recipe, I would say the energy balls. These are great and super easy to make even at home. At the beginning of the mountain bike days for the Vallées-Bras-du-Nord camp, there is a spread of jars with everything from dried apricots and cranberries to almond slices and honey and oats and pumpkin seeds and more. You simply mix your preferred ingredients in a bowl, add some honey and apple sauce for texture and stick and voila! You've got an energy ball to snack on later in the day. A lot of recipes can actually be found on the Les Chèvres de blog here → Yummy recipes!

What are your personal favorites gear-wise? It can be accessories, boots, jackets, backpacks, hydration systems, whatever.

I am currently in LOVE with my new Giro Cartelle MIPS helmet! I had a hard time finding a new helmet because I was just in between the small and medium for POC but this Giro fits like a glove. It's comfortable for long rides (my last helmet had an awkward pressure point in the middle of my forehead) and looks great. The best part is that it is equipped with MIPS® which reduces rotational forces. This is important for me with my past head injuries so I am happy to have a helmet that I feel safe wearing. Ooft, there is so much great gear on the market these days! I try to look away so that I can keep my credit card from screaming at me but hydration-wise, the hip packs are becoming incredibly popular! Not everyone is keen on wearing a hydration pack (although they can double as back protection as some brands will integrate spinal protection in the design) so the hip pack is the next best thing. I'll be wearing a CamelBak RePack™ LR 4 this season which I am excited to try out and I know that Osprey's Seral Lumbar Pack has been receiving raving reviews. For all the latest in mountain bike gear, stories and utter radness, check out Pinkbike.com. This is the epicentre of the Mountain bike world and a great source of knowledge, entertainment and of course, used bike goodies to purchase.

What did you learn from the group? What are your challenges for the year?

One of the biggest things I have learned from Les Chèvres de Montagne is that there are A LOT of badass ladies here in Quebec who absolutely slay on the trails, the slopes, and the crags! When I first started mountain biking, it was very much a men's sport although the times are changing (a lot) and it's amazing. The number of ladies that turn up for the mountain bike events and other events for that matter is impressive and inspiring. I'm proud and feel honored to be a part of such an amazing community of fierce women who are turning the tables in the outdoor world and also showing how accessible these adventures can be.

Anything else you’d like to share?

For all the ladies (sorry fellas, Les Chèvres de Montagne is for ladies only). Don't be shy! If there's an activity you're interested in but don't have a car or are not sure if you will be good, just do it! There are often many girls travelling from Montreal for events so finding someone to carpool with isn't a problem AND I can guarantee you're going to have a wicked time if you go.

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shadowlineswriting · 7 years

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Meyer

If you’ve never heard of Twilight, that may be a sign that you’re living under a rock. In case you haven’t, though, I will give you some very quick background:

Vampire literature actually hasn’t been around that long. It’s not one thousand years old, like some mythologies, and it’s not several thousand years old, like fairies. Though vampire stories have gone through their own variations, for the most part, they followed the same rules. They burn up in the sun. You can kill them by staking them through the heart with wood. You can ward them off with holy water and garlic. They drink human blood to survive. They’re dead, so they have no heartbeat and they’re hideous. Etc., etc. Since early vampire legends developed from porphyria (much the same way werewolf legends came from humans infected with rabies), it makes sense that vampires would have the classic symptoms of the disease, even in canon.

This is the pattern vampire literature followed for just over 250 years...until Stephenie Meyer wrote the Twilight quartet. They are: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn, with a novella titled The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner going in between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn, and Midnight Sun being partially released a few years ago, which is Twilight as told from the perspective of another character. The books are immensely popular, as are the 5 Twilight movies made. In fact, Twilight will forever belong on the same list as Harry Potter and The Hunger Games. We’re living in the age of young adult fiction, y’all.

Anyway. The story tells of a human girl named Bella Swan who moves to Forks, Washington, to live with her dad. She’s resigned herself to a boring life--Forks has a population of less than 3500 people and her dad is kind of a workaholic. But when she starts school, she meets Edward Cullen, and then suddenly life isn’t boring at all.

Edward isn’t like the other boys. For one thing, he’s unearthly beautiful. His eyes are gold and his skin is white. Not white, like, Cacuasian--white white. He always smells good and he has perfect teeth and he gets 100% scores on every single thing he does. Every girl in the school’s had a crush on him at some point, but Edward is reclusive. He doesn’t make friends. He doesn’t partake in school activities or sports. He’s a vampire, of course.

What’s strange is that he falls for Bella, who learns more about Edward’s world and what it would mean to be a part of it. I don’t want to give anything away, but that’s the gist of the story.

I have copious things to say about this book series, so buckle up.

1. I’d just like to mention that I was one of the first people in the general public to read Twilight. I’m sure everyone claims that, but here’s how it happened for me. The year it came out, my sister Laura and I were doing a reading program at our library. There were different categories that we were supposed to fill with x number of books. I went to the librarian working in the teen section to ask for some help on paranormal romance (remember, that wasn’t a huge thing yet). She thought for a moment and then pulled Twilight out of a box under her desk. “Try this one,” she said. “We just got it in, and I haven’t even put it on the shelves yet.” I took it home and started reading it that night while I was babysitting my next-door neighbor’s daughter, Emily. Emily went to bed early (totally her choice) and Glen and Cindy weren’t due back for a while, so I settled in to read. I had it halfway done by the time they got home. Glen read the back and laughed. “I’ve never heard of anything like that,” he said, “but leave it to you to read it!”

2. I tell you this because it’s important to understand that when I first read Twilight, it was just a book. It wasn’t the mega-story it is now, where pretty much anyone from age 10-75 can tell you all about it. It was just a book written by a first-time author, and one of the reasons I loved it was because it was so unique--to me, it was special. For months afterward I tried to talk to people about it but no one had ever heard of it. So it was an incredible story that seemed almost secret, somehow, which just made it all the more delicious.

3. Here are some of the pros for Twilight. First of all, Stephenie Meyer is an incredible author. A lot of people claim she’s angsty, and I don’t disagree, but the thing is, at least she makes you feel. I’ve read the series probably a dozen times by now but I still find myself emotionally connecting to characters each time, even though I know what to expect before I so much as crack the cover. She sucks you in immediately and never lets you go even after you turn the final page. That’s quite a gift. There are a lot of good authors out there, but few that I would describe as naturals, or authors who could write to change the world. Meyer is certainly one of them. So I have to give her huge respect for that. Another thing I love about Twilight is that the book could have easily fallen into the same routine the rest of the world follows when it comes to relationships--you know, plenty of fish in the sea, casual sex is fine, healthy even, and you shouldn’t let someone else take care of you because that’s weak. Don’t let yourself get attached. All that garbage. Meyer does not cross lines with this series. Each of the dedicated relationships in this book series is monogamous, which is quite an impressive feat already. More than that, though, Edward and Bella share a few steamy kisses, but nothing more. Edward flat-out refuses to have sex with Bella until they are married. Now, I admit that the fourth book gets, um, adult. But they’re married by then. It’s very rare to see a popular story for teenagers that promotes abstinence and dedication, so Meyer deserves huge applause for pulling that off.

4. Here are a few cons. For one thing, Edward and Bella’s relationship is seriously messed up. In fact, when I was in grad school I wrote a paper proving that their relationship meets all 15 points set by the National Abuse Hotline to define an abusive relationship. And I still believe that it does. This is tempered by the fact that they truly do care for each other, which is great, but it’s taken to an unhealthy level. Another con is that the book is very dramatic, but that has a lot more to do with Meyer’s intended audience than the story itself, I think. Now that I’ve read them so many times, I freely admit that I speed read the angsty portions. After one or two paragraphs of “You are my whole world” “You are my whole world” “I can’t live without you” “I can’t live without you!” “I’ll love you for the rest of my existence” “I’ll love you for the rest of my existence!” that I really just get bored. Lots of love...moving on. There are a few minor points I struggle with as well, but I blame Meyer’s editor more for these. For example, they make a huge deal about how Bella is adult beyond her years because she has to take care of her parents and be the responsible one in the family, but then she skips meals frequently and when she does eat she eats like garbage. If she’s not responsible enough to take care of herself, then I find it hard to believe she could take care of her parents. They also make a big deal about how Charlie, her father, hates being called Charlie and she always calls him Dad. Well, it doesn’t take long before she slips back into calling him Charlie...yet Charlie never says one word about it. If it bothered him that much, wouldn’t he speak up?

Ultimately, I am keeping Twilight. They aren’t the kind of books I want to read often, but I always enjoy them when I read them, and as an author I enjoy studying the way Meyer conveys emotion and depth in relationships. It’s fascinating. I’m not sure you should let your kid read these...but if it comes down to this or one of the other 500 teenage paranormal romances out there, I sincerely believe this one is “safest.” They stay!

P.S. They did a great job with the movies, too. Many of the actors are not who I envisioned when reading the books, but all things considered, they kept to the books very well.

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