the scene I wrote this morning, because I like it, but actually while this is a scene I like in concept, I am not actually sure if it will make it to final draft. I hope but you know it could easily get axed.
Very minor spoilers for Cat & Trickster, mostly alluding to what the plan for making the bank come down is. Also a warning that this does discuss grown men creeping on Ann. Nothing actually happening (the only two characters in scene are Ann and Mika), but Ann thinking about it.
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The last time Ann had worn her hair down had been as a first year. Kamoshida had complimented her on how “mature” she looked for her age. She’d been told that before, but that time, with all the nice-but-vaguely-creepy compliments Kamoshida had already given her, had made Ann realize that men told her she looked “mature for her age” way more than women did, and that they might be interested in her supposed maturity for reasons she did not actually feel ready for yet. She’d immediately started trying to figure out how to phrase an online search for looks that were pretty, but more “girlish” than “ladylike”, and that wouldn’t make it too obvious Shiho’s coach freaked her out. She’d decided to use searches with the word “cute”. She’d decided on pigtails, since she could always say she wanted her hair up and out of the way.
Obviously, pigtails hadn’t actually worked to deter Kamoshida. When he said she looked mature it had just been to flatter her and make her lower her guard, or give himself an excuse for lusting after a student, or both. But Ann felt like pigtails got fewer passes made at her by random guys, so she’d kept wearing her hair that way and gotten attached to the style.
For this mission, though, she was supposed to look like she was trying to be seductive. That meant the pigtails had to go. After carefully pulling each hairtie out and brushing her hair back over her shoulders, Ann stared at her reflection in the dressing room mirror, trying to think of what else she should do. She still looked too much like a high schooler, obviously because she was one, but like…what the hell were creeps even seeing when they said she looked mature? Should she try a sexy pose, like this? Or like that? Or—
“What. Are you. Doing,” Mika said, and Ann nearly jumped out of her skin, forcing a laugh as she whirled to face her unamused coworker.
“Hi, Mika! Actually, I’m really glad you’re here, I could use some advice,” she babbled. Whether Mika would actually give helpful advice was very questionable, but Ann didn’t doubt for a second that if Mika were in her shoes, she’d know exactly how to nail ‘trying to be seductive but not in danger of actually seducing anyone’. Since Ann couldn’t explain why she was trying to go for that, she’d have to go for the next best thing. “I thought I should try experimenting with new looks, something more mature—you did say pigtails made me look like a little girl. And that last shot you did with Vague was so cool and sexy. I was kind of hoping to capture that kind of energy.” And whatever advice Mika gave for that, Ann would take…and then maybe try to tone down 50%.
“And that’s why you were thrusting out your chest?”
Man. Ann had really been hoping Mika hadn’t seen that. Or would forget it in favor of flattery. “Ha. Ha ha. You got me. Should’ve known that wouldn’t work, right?”
Mika folded her arms. “Is this actually for modeling? You’re not trying to impress some new boyfriend, are you?”
Ann hesitated, because that was actually the perfect way to bring up that she specifically wanted to go for ‘seductive’, except this was Mika and Mika already got mad that she didn’t take modeling seriously enough. Then again, it kind of sounded like Mika had already assumed she wasn’t taking modeling seriously. “Whyyyy would you think it’s for a boyfriend?”
“You’re tensed up. You barely put any thought into your shoots, so why would you get this wound up over trying a new look? Unless it’s for some boytoy.”
Well, since she couldn’t exactly explain she was going to be trying to seduce a mafia boss without actually seduce him— “Okay, okay, you got me again,” Ann said, sitting down. In the next minute Mika could easily blow her off as a ‘girl playing dress-up’ again, so she had to make her case now. “But it could help with my modeling too, right? It’s just, I think he might not take me seriously enough. He’s, um, older than me—in college—and um, in business—a business major—so he’s really mature, you know? And I don’t want him just writing me off as too childish.” She did. She wanted, absolutely, for Kaneshiro and his goons to write her off as a child that didn’t interest them personally. But they had to think she was trying.
Mika’s face had twisted up like she’d accidentally picked out a sour candy. When she spoke, her tone was acidic. “You want my advice?”
Here came the reaming. Mika was pissed off. Ann shrugged. “Of course.” Might as well get it over with so she could go back to stressing over her half-baked plan—
“Dump him.”
Ann blinked. Mika was definitely mad, but that wasn’t the lashing out she’d expected, and she accidentally let a real laugh slip out. “Um. No? Are you upset I have a boyfriend?” It was funny considering how fictional the boyfriend was.
“You don’t have a boyfriend,” Mika said. “Either he’s not interested and you’re wasting your time, or if you’re actually dating, and he’s—“ She let out a frustrated huff. “You are childish. You don’t take modeling seriously, you binge on sweets, you don’t put any thought into your words sometimes, and you love cutesy nonsense. If he’s telling you he loves you while telling you you have to be mature for him, he doesn’t actually love you. Probably loves your body, though. Stop being an idiot and dump him.”
“…Oh,” Ann said in surprise. Mika was giving real advice, just… Ann had accidentally convinced her the fictional boyfriend was a manipulative jerk, probably because trying to translate “scary mafia boss” into plausible boyfriend material had been doomed from the start. “Um.” What in the world was she supposed to say now? She was kind of stuck on the thought that she’d actually made Mika worried for her.
The older model seemed just as awkward, giving her a second glance before turning away pointedly to fuss with the accessories on a different table. “Sorry to burst your bubble, but you should have figured it out sooner.”
“No, um, thanks,” Ann said, smoothing out her skirt as she stood. “I really appreciate your honesty. And your concern.” She’d have to update Mika about a totally fictional breakup in a few days. Hopefully she’d sell that better than the whole ‘boyfriend’ deal.
Mika let out a small ‘hmph’. “It’s nothing. We do a lot of shoots together, and I won’t tolerate you making me look bad because you’re distracted by some dirtbag.”
Ann smiled. “Of course. Have a good night, Mika.”
While she hadn’t gotten any usable advice, Mika’s unexpected words managed to calm the butterflies in Ann’s stomach for a little while, until she was on the train back home. Then she started worrying all over again about what would happen if Kaneshiro didn’t see her as a potential customer. When her phone vibrated, she dove for it, eager for a distraction…and a distraction she got, as the brief message, and who’d sent it, had her instantly wonder what was going on.
RA: Meet me in Shibuya.
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“Pib’s just trying to figure out what to do and sees this opportunity and he’s like, I don’t like that [the Authors] think that they know our stories better than we know our stories. And with that in mind, he just throws the dagger into the inky darkness of the hand.”
“You throw that dagger. A whirlpool appears where the dagger goes. The hand just begins to swirl in on itself, imploding and collapsing and becoming raw ink. Ink splatters truly everywhere around you. You feel the force of the teeth that you have been throwing, and you hear a voice, and Ylfa, you hear this voice as well go, “that’s something we all have in common, people and stories, come to an end”. Ink splatters everywhere. You, Tim, feel a sudden shift and panic of these extraplanar beings, that suddenly have a moment of considering that the world that has always been a toy to them has just fought back.”
— Neverafter finale: “The Ending of All Things (Part 2)”
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What's your favorite sneaking around music (e.g., Pink Panther theme, Mission: Impossible theme)?
Great question!
I'd say Mission: Impossible is not sneaking around music, it's heist music, and mmmaybe taking itself a bit too seriously. Too much competence implied for my tastes, too much action and epicness, and way too much (and fully underserved, since this is some Cold War bullshit) self-righteousness. A great and iconic theme, just not for our purposes.
Meanwhile, The Pink Panther Theme is 100% trickster music. I don't think there's even been another melody that captures so perfectly the concept of sneaking, but who's doing the sneaking? A trickster, for sure! So the music is all sleight, playful and light-footed and irreverent, and at no point is it remotely tempted to take itself seriously. And if you hear it and expect the graceful and precise balancing act of the most elegant jewel thief in the world to be immediately followed by a fucking piano falling on the hapless Inspector Clouseau's head like some Looney Tunes shit, well the theme did its job, because that's what it's supposed to evoke. 10/10, insurpassable.
I've always said that Henry Mancini was a genius (also notable for the Peter Gunn theme and Victor/Victoria). That said, Lalo Schifrin is also brilliant (he scored Cook Hand Luke! and Bullitt! and Enter the Dragon!), so yay for both of them.
Finally, I think we should give an honourable mention to The Pirates of Penzance where WITH CAT-LIKE TREAD UPON OUR PREY WE STEAL *keeps singing at the top of her lungs*
With cat-like tread upon our prey we steal
In silence dread our cautious way we feel
No sound at all, we never speak a word
A fly's foot-fall would be distinctly heard
So stealthily the pirate creeps
While all the household soundly sleeps
Come friends who plough the sea
Truce to navigation, take another station
Let's vary piracy with a little burglary
Here's your crowbar and your centre bit
Your life preserver, you may want to hit
Your silent matches, your dark lantern seize
Take your file and your skeletonic keys
With cat-like tread upon our prey we steal
In silence dread our cautious way we feel
No sound at all, we never speak a word
A fly's foot-fall would be distinctly heard
Come friends who plough the sea
Truce to navigation, take another station
Let's vary piracy with a little burglary
WITH CAT-LIKE TREAD UPON OUR PREY WE STEAL
IN SILENCE DREAD OUR CAUTIOUS WAY WE FEEL
COME FRIENDS WHO PLOUGH THE SEA
TRUCE TO NAVIGATION, TAKE ANOTHER STATION
LET'S VARY PIRACY WITH A LITTLE BURGLARY
WITH CAT-LIKE TREAD
UPON OUR PREY WE STEAL
IN SILENCE DREAD
OUR CAUTIOUS WAY WE FEEL
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