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#but. that entire dungeon was really really good
dwobbitfromtheshire · 22 hours
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The Truth of the Matter
A/N: Warning dirty talk and misunderstandings of a certain word.
Summary: One day, Eddie, Dustin, Lucas, and Mike decide to summon a fairy. . .it's Steve Harrington. Chaos ensues. Pre-season 4, pre-Steddie.
Eddie pouted as he sat down on his throne. He was really looking forward to playing tonight, but Gareth, Jeff, and Frankie were all out sick. They had all gotten mono, which is what they get for practicing kissing. Gareth immediately yelled at him for that comment. Apparently, that's not what happened. Eddie was cackling to himself when the door opened. Dustin, Mike, and Lucas all filtered in talking excitedly.
"Hey, buttheads, did you not get the memo? Hellfire has been canceled," Eddie said.
"We thought you were joking," Dustin said.
"You never cancel Hellfire for anything," Lucas frowned.
"Well, Jeff, Gareth, and Frankie are all out sick with the kissing disease," Eddie said.
"Oh, that's right, they weren't at lunch," Mike said.
"Well, now what?" Lucas asked.
"You boys want to perform a spell?" Eddie said. "I found this cool little book at a Flea Market. Want to try it?"
Mike, Lucas, and Dustin all shared weary looks.
"Uh. . . "
"What? Don't be a bunch of chicken shits. Nothing is going to happen. It's just for fun," Eddie said. "What could possibly go wrong?"
"Of course, nothing is going to happen," Dustin said laughing. "That would he crazy."
"You're laughing a little hard there, Henderson," Eddie said. "It's not like I'm going to accidentally open a portal to hell."
Now, it was Lucas, Dustin, and Mike all laughing rather loudly. Eddie gave them all strange looks.
"Robes!" Eddie exclaimed, clapping his hands.
"We have those?" Lucas asked, and Eddie just cackled.
Several moments later, they lowered the lights and slipped on robes that covered their faces. Lit candles were scattered around them as Eddie opened a leather bound book in front of them.
"Why in the fuck did I get stuck with the pink robe?" Mike asked. "Why are all the others black and this one is pink?"
"You were too slow, Mike. Now, hush," Dustin said.
"What are we summoning?" Lucas asked.
"A fairy," Eddie replied.
"Why a fairy?" He asked.
"Well, according to this book, fairies have extraordinary healing abilities, bring you good luck, and have the ability to shield you from harm," Eddie said. "Sounds cool although, sometimes they have shitty luck themselves, so I don't know how that works."
"It also says they're loneliest creatures on the planet because they're wildly misunderstood," Dustin read over his shoulder. "Rather than harming children like some think, these creatures do everything in their power to protect them from harm. Most of the time, it is because they themselves were stolen in the night as children to be used by human greed. Aw, why didn't you say you just wanted to summon a lonely fairy who protects children?"
"Shut it, Henderson," Eddie said.
"And you're sure they won't be able to see our faces?" Dustin asked, and Eddie gave him a look. "Right. Shutting up."
Eddie began speaking and used his deep dungeon master voice as he said the spell. After the entire spell was done, they waited. . . and waited. . . Finally, a huge gust of wind swirled around them, the flames grew large, and the lights flickered behind them. Suddenly, a figure was falling in the middle of their circle with a loud thud.
"I was on a fucking ladder! What the fuck!" Steve’s voice yelled. "Oh, there's the light bulb. Huh, it didn't break."
Steve flopped onto his back and screamed at the sight of hooded figures surrounding him. Surprised voices whispered excitedly as they looked down on him. Steve furrowed his eyebrows in confusion at the sight of the bright pink one.
"Do not be afraid, Steve Harrington," a deep voice spoke. "We mean you no harm."
"What the fuck do you want from me?" Steve asked. "How did you even bring me here?"
"Magic. . .tell us your deepest, darkest secrets," the voice said.
"Fuck. Fuck! Okay! Okay! I, uh, like blue and yellow, but what everyone doesn't know, besides Robin, is that I like the color pink," Steve said.
"Interesting, but not what we're looking for," the voice said.
"I always wanted a little brother, but it wasn't until the kids I babysit came into my life that I finally got the siblings I always wanted, and I think if anyone of them died, I would die," Steve said.
"Aw," a familiar voice said softly and sniffled.
"That's . . . Really fucking sweet but no, not what I'm looking for," the voice said.
"Okay, okay. . .Robin's like my best friend in the world, my platonic soulmate, but I lied to her. She asked me if I was still in love with Nancy Wheeler, and I lied, I think I always will be. I just didn't want to seem so pathetic because I know it's over," Steve said. "Is that it?"
"Uh. . .warmer. . ."
"I once had a sex dream where I was with Jonathan and Nancy, but I never told anyone because I thought it would be weird."
"What the fu - "
"Quiet," the deep voice said. "That isn't what I'm looking for, but, uh, close."
"Okay, I once got my dick sucked at a party by a guy, and it led me to a lot of realizations. . ." Steve trailed off.
"OKAY. . .mi'lord, I do not think this man knows that he is a fairy," one of the figures said.
"HEY! That is a really offensive term. I'm bisexual," Steve replied. "Sacrifice me all you want but respect my sexuality please. Although I once used a rude term, I didn't know about myself at the time. Do you want to talk before you kill me?"
"You're, uh, surprisingly calm now," the deep voice said. "For someone who thinks we're going to kill them."
"Well, it's happened too many times now," Steve shrugged. "Is that what you wanted to know?"
". . .no."
"Well, I wish I was a woman sometimes. . .mostly because I wish I could go through the birthing process. . . I don't think my parents are my real parents. . . I once let Robin touch my dick because she wanted to know what it felt like. . . It was weird for both of us. . .sometimes I think about getting on my knees for Eddie Munson and - "
"OOKAY! STEVE, STOP SPILLING YOUR DEEP DARK SECRETS! I ACCEPT YOU FOR ALL OF IT BUT SOME THINGS SHOULD REMAIN A MYSTERY!"
"Let him speak!" The deep voice said.
"Stop with the sexual ones, at least!"
"Okay. . .um, it makes me really happy to know that I have a hobby to share with one of my kids. I mean, at least one of them, you know, understands why I like basketball so much. I love all of my kids, and I really wish I could play D&D, but I'm not great at math. I don't want to look more stupid in front of them. More importantly, I could be doing anything with them, and I still feel less alone knowing they want me to be around them. . . Even if they're being shitheads. I love it though, when they bitch at me. They're my family, and I've never really felt like I had that until they came along," Steve said. "Robin, too. She's my family too."
Suddenly, all Steve could hear was the sound of them sniffling, and they dropped to their knees around him. They dropped their hoods, revealing Mike, Dustin, and Lucas. They all hugged him tightly.
"What the fuck?" Steve asked.
"We'll explain it all later," Dustin sniffled. "Just know that we love you too."
"Oh, you're also adopted," Mike muttered.
"He wasn't adopted! He was kidnapped!" Lucas exclaimed.
"Oh, right."
The other person dropped their hood, revealing Eddie Munson.
"So, what was that thing you wanted to do with Eddie?" He asked with a smirk.
Suddenly, the doors burst open and Robin came running in, breathing heavily.
"Guys! Steve was changing the light bulb in Family Video, and he just disappeared - oh, hey, Steve! Steve! What the fuck's going on?!" Robin asked.
"Robin, guess what?!" Mike asked. "Steve’s a fucking fairy!"
"No! Robin, don't punch Mike! That's not what he meant!"
Mike screamed.
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kagamesayu · 1 day
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laois x reader
c/w . gn!reader reader, fluff wc: 375 a/n . this himbo has my heart in a tight grip reblogs and comments appreciated ✧*.
laois who is your beloved boyfriend and dungeon partner. your rock and your reason for adventuring.
you'd met when looking for a party to join. the moment he set his eyes on you it was like something awakened in him.
he'd done everything he could to get you on his party, and subsequently by his side.
you'd been so enamoured by him and his quirkiness that you agreed.
and the rest is history.
laois who almost always has one hand on the handle of his sword and the other in yours. his thumb writes his name into your skin, and he wishes it was there permanently.
definitely the type to have your name tattooed on him - probably on his wrist so when he fights he remembers you're with him.
laois who kisses you good morning and good night. who kisses you as a greeting and goodbye. who kisses you for...any reason really.
he just loves it - loves kissing you.
loves the soft pecks that reassure each other that you're okay, loves the long loving kisses you share when you sneak off, and he especially loves the messy, wet make-outs that he can only periodically indulge in when he knows that you, him and the party are safe.
laois who - after every encounter - looks for you and asks whether you're okay.
yes, he should care for the entire party, but he can't help the deep carnal need to make sure you are safe first.
you are special and precious to him, and though everyone revives, he refuses to see - and even let - you die.
he let it happen once and watching the life leave your eyes is something he will always see in his darkest of nightmares. the fear and agony on your face, right before you'd been impaled and taken away from him.
never again.
laois who spends almost all his free time out of dungeons with you. you're usually seen hand in hand in either hanging out in your shared rooms in inns or in libraries reading about monsters.
you have your own notebook about monsters, with personal little doodles and facts.
when laois first brought up the idea, he was worried you'd think it'd be boring. he was taken aback when you agreed with as much enthusiasm as you did.
he was even more surprised when you showed how eager you were in helping him.
he thinks he fell even more in love that day.
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ohanny · 2 days
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a very self-indulgent omega kim going into heat after being kidnapped kentakim hc because why not
so the basic premise is kenta and kim connected before the unfortunate basement throwing incident at tony's house. like kenta had to deal with red racing and kim was a flirt. it wasn't anything serious but it had the potential to be. there was always something between them but kenta kept drawing back and kim thought they’d have all the time in the world.
but then the kimnapping happens.
and kim is MEGA pissed, okay? kenta visits him in his dungeon room of doom all "fuck, i am so sorry, i warned you, i told you to stay away" and kim is like "oh fuck off" and kenta is all kicked puppy swearing he will help get kim out. and he does. he gets kim out of there but kim is still very much "bitch grow a fucking spine if you want to talk to me ever again. you're a coward. you know what you're doing is wrong and you are not doing enough. be better."
kim is shipped to alans and moves in and he just... keeps feeling like shit. he can't explain it until he realizes he's going into heat and fuck if it isn't a whole ass mess - pun intended - because he hasn't had one in a medically inadvisable time and he thought he was still in the clear, swallowing a fistful of suppressants the first chance he got after his kimnapping.
and it hurts. the entire pack is freaking out because a) kim is an omega???? and b) yeah nah that is not a normal heat. kim is feverish and doubled over in pain and yes he smells sickly sweet but emphasis on sickly. it's the sweetness of rotting fruit and not like oh yeah, slick and slide, and people are worried.
alan: someone needs to do something
sonic: i literally offered to knot him
alan: and?
sonic: he threw a glass at me.
north and jeff build him a nest like see, pack is here, but kim keeps hissing at them and saying it's all wrong and after a long weekend they are all this close to calling an ambulance and having him shipped into a heat clinic against his will.
but then there is a knock on the door.
it's kenta, looking agitated and stressed as fuck and alan goes full "oh hell no, not the time" but kenta physically forces his way through the door, nostrils flaring like a blood hound, and everyone is like "uh oh spaghettios" and babe is squaring up like bitch, he is ready to fight
and then kim stumbles down the stairs looking like absolute death and kenta might elbow someone in the face to break free and before anyone can interrupt, kim collapses against kenta and buries his face in kenta's throat with a whine and he's all "i really tried but i need -" and kenta's all "it's okay, you're okay. and you were right. about me. about everything" and he will just full on garfield scoop kim up.
the pack stands there like "um excuse me, what the fuck?" and kenta pretends this is all fine and normal and asks where the bathroom is and if someone could prepare them some food. babe is still ready to deck the bastard because fuck him but then his nose scrunches because oh. okay. that's less rotting fruit and more like burnt sugar all of a sudden and alan is like "OOOOOKKKAAAAAAY" and sonic's like "bathroom's upstairs, third door on the right, i'll make you a fruit bowl?"
north: dude. that's kenta.
sonic: you wanna try pry kim off of him?
north: good point.
and then north smiles and says “you know what kenta, i'll show you where everything is” except when north gets close to them, kim peeks out of kentas neck and bares his teeth at north because excuse me, his alpha, how dare you.
kenta carries kim upstairs to first draw him a cold bath to get his fever down and makes him drink a glass of water and in the midst of it kim has a moment of clarity.
kim: fuck. i didn't meant to call you. you can go.
kenta: you really think i could leave you alone like this?
kim: but what about -
kenta: he doesn't know where i am. i’ll figure it out after.
kim knows he should fight this but he has no energy to do so anymore. he’s in pain and exhausted and can't do this alone and having kenta here, touching him, is such a relief. it’s much easier to just give in. kim drifts in a pleasant haze as kenta washes the smell of sickness away, towels him off and bundles him into a bathrobe to carry to his nest.
when sonic brings over his fruit bowl, kim is splayed out on the sheets, flushed and staring at kenta with these dazed eyes, already pretty far gone. it's a bit awkward as another alpha but he hands over the fruit and backs away. he lingers in the doorway long enough to see kenta very gently coax kim to eat something from his fingers before quietly closing the door and going back downstairs. and that's how sonic becomes the number one kenta advocate because he's a sucker for a good love story and obviously this is something that's been going on for a while and it would be criminal to separate them now.
he tells the rest of the pack that everything’s going well and they need to make a plan because kenta sure as shit will need them to have one ready by the time kim and him re-emerge.
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altofbutterfly · 3 days
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I need Shane Stardew Valley and Laios Dungeon Meshi to meet and undergo a four season friendship character arc and then make out against a wall.
they need to LOCK LIPS
Shane needs to play video games & pass beers with Laios getting shitfaced and listening to him ramble half listening half not & chiming in with comments about stuff he knows enough about to add something real to.
Laios needs to dive into the lore of the game Shane is playing and they need to talk and trade beer cans & debate recipes and all the fucked up shit they could do to pizza.
oh my lord these boys need to try cooking something and end up making just a really, really shitty pizza & then go eat it and sit in the barn with the chickens while Laios goes batshit about blue chickens and Shane explains the entire process to creating them whilst laying across a haybale staring up at the ceiling...
Honestly, a Stardew Valley x Dungeon Meshi au would fuck so good. Senshi as farmowner, Falin and Laios as farm hands,,,
Marcille as Haley and Emily's cousin who moved with the Toudens back to the valley and housed them for a little before they went to work with Senshi....
Co-owner of Pierre's Chilchuck who used to co-own Joja and his wife is actually Morris because that's fucking funny to me,,,,
Cat Izutsumi.....
I got off topic. Anyway.
Shlaios. Lahane. All the names are atrocious insults to nature, as they should be.
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grooviestsadpapaya · 5 months
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You know as much as I don’t like TotK the Colgera battle was masterful. That was literally an experience that was good.
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gammija · 1 month
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i REALLY enjoyed dungeon meshi, it has lovely characters and story and worldbuilding - but some of the posts and tweets i saw about it going in, lead me to believe that it had more horror/tragedy elements than it does. While it does have its more serious themes and dark moments, it fits solidly into the fantasy-adventure genre.
just thought I'd put that out there, in case some of yall following me for tma have gotten curious about it
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isa-ah · 4 months
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not to beat a dead horse bc I know I've said this a thousand times already but totk sucked. there was nothing to work with after it ended. by this time in botw content circles it was ramping UP. it went for YEARS with elaborate theories and videos and an entire secondary canon built by theorists and fans. when was the last time you saw someone talk about totk? how much positive discussion have you seen about the story, ever? theories, world building, etc? anything at all?
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a-nameless-cryptid · 4 months
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Marcille sketch
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lacependragon · 26 days
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Hi I'm gonna rant about Apothecary Diaries and how much I hate it again because Youtube won't stop reccing me videos of it and I have to keep staring at the thumbnails while I wait for my sub page to load. So I keep thinking. And spiralling.
Also straight up like 75% of my problem with Apothecary Diaries is that Jinshi is not a fucking eunuch.
It's like the basis of him being in the harem area. Not only is it a massive fuck you to everything about harem but like? It's solely so that he, the love interest, has a cock he can stick in Maomao? It's because he's the male love interest. That's it.
If he was actually a eunuch it might be an interesting take on the romance. As it stands, it's the most boring, cookie cutter, snark-snark woman in a subservient position but doesn't act like it, heterosexual relationship ever. It reminds me of 10,000 other romances that have done it better and with more interesting men.
And god I just. It's so frustrating because Jinshi is the only part of this show that I dislike! The rest of the show has fascinating themes and moral quandries and characters. And then there's Jinshi. Trying to fuck Maomao. And being creepy. And being in the harem area despite not being a eunuch and clearly having a sexual desire for Maomao. Which, again, rules. Where are the rules. Why does this rule not fucking matter.
Why does the worldbuilding of this series build up everything so nicely and so perfectly and then Jinshi comes in and none of it applies to him? It's not even well written in the narrative. He just sucks. He can do whatever he wants. Whenever he wants. And there's no fucking consequences. Ever.
Oh no Maomao thinks he's ugly.
Big fucking whoop this guy could hold her down and assault her and he wouldn't get in trouble.
I just. I cannot get over how much Jinshi sucks. How much his character is awful. How the story just completely ignores all the ways he breaks it and its rules and just goes "lalalalala" and keeps going.
Everything about Jinshi sucks. He breaks every rule. He is creepy. He abuses his power. He's not actually supposed to be in the fucking harem. And in the end it's SURPRISE! He's got a functional cock! So he can FUCK YOU ANYWAY!
Honestly it seems to me like the creator just. Fell in love with Jinshi and stopped caring about logic.
And I STILL can't get over the BAIT AND SWITCH and the eunuch thing. Like of COURSE the ONE THING that makes this not a typical power-struggle snark-snark-kiss anime relationship isn't even fucking REAL.
God I fucking hate this series.
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gothamcityneedsme · 5 months
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tbh labrys is my favorite persona spinoff character
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fishareglorious · 10 months
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Seven Outis' attacks sounds so much like she's whacking the enemy with a metal bat it's kinda amusing to me. Nonetheless that hollow 'THWOCK' remains incredibly satisfying to my ears
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blueskittlesart · 2 years
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Hey just out of curiosity, (because I'm at work and can't read all 46 pages of your LoZ analysis) which 3 would you say are your absolute favorites? Either for the story or nostalgia, or returning for fun gameplay bits. Personally I'd say Majoras, minish cap, and botw
ocarina of time, breath of the wild, and a link to the past, in that order!!
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blujaydoodles · 2 years
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[shaking them around like a tin can full of pennies]
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addoves · 10 months
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i think in terms of dungeon and battle style berseria is my least favorite. you can really tell where arise branched off from this game. the story and characters are really good and fun though so that makes up for it
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perenlop · 1 year
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for all my gripes w psmd’s plot the one thing i absolutely have to give it is the tone. the tone is fantastic and probably the best out of any pmd game tbh
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green-and-mean · 10 months
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Nothing like reconnecting to an old friend only to realize you don't really like the person that they are that much. It stops the nostalgia and the yearning for what was and could have been, but it's still so majorly dissapointing.
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