#but i can't allow ollie to be that sad and lonely)

[zimms]

ooo 1 & Ollie/Wicks? 👀

incompatible - a balladeer

It's chemically decided love is blind

And so, I don't know what hit me

Let me fall into your arms, for I am sure

That they are going to fit me

Though we're incompatible

Ollie heaves a sigh as he gazes down at Wicky in the bed next to his. How can everything he wants be so goddamn close and yet so far away?

He’s not entirely sure how he’s been able to keep this crush under wraps for the past three years, and to be frank, he probably hasn’t, if the pitying looks that Ransom shoots his way are anything to go by. He foolishly thought that it would go away if he tried to keep some distance between him and Wicky for a bit, but that plan didn’t work in freshman year, and two more years of close proximity haven’t done anything to minimise his crush either. 

Which is what brings Ollie to the here and now: pining for his best friend in some anonymous hotel in the middle of nowhere, Michigan. 

Today’s game had been pretty standard - a loss in overtime to a team that has always been and will always be better than Samwell. It’s the same result that they’d had playing this team for the past three years, seamlessly predictable. However, the one part of the trip that hadn’t gone without a hitch was the rooming situation. 

Yeah, Ollie and Wicky are usually road roommates, that’s pretty normal. 

But this, the whole ‘there’s only one bed thing,’ yeah, that’s definitely not normal. 

Like, it isn’t the worst; the hotel was extremely apologetic and had given them two separate comforters at least, but there isn’t the usual safe distance of a few feet to keep Ollie from subconsciously reaching out for what he so desperately wants. 

They’d had the option to say no, of course, but Wicky had dived in to say yes all too quickly, clearly not as torn by his feelings as Ollie. 

That’s one of the worst things about being in love with your road roommate, line mate, best friend; the fact that you can tell all too easily that they don’t feel the same way about you. Wicky never blinks at the amount of physical affection they share, all too easily agreeing to share a bed, hug each other for perhaps a little too long, kiss each other’s helmets after a great goal on the ice. 

Ollie used to take it as a sign that perhaps Wicky might feel the same way too, opening up to Ollie’s casual affection in a way he doesn’t with anyone else. Now? Now Ollie sees it as a sign of rejection; Wicky’s ease in returning his affection shows just how much he doesn’t even think about their interactions and how they could be a sign of more. 

Wicky rolls onto his side in his sleep, arm flopping down onto the mattress and landing in the chasm between the two of them, and Ollie freezes, breath catching in his throat. 

Wicky doesn’t move anymore though, his hand remaining there like an invitiation. 

And slowly, slowly, because he’s a masochist if nothing else, Ollie allows himself to let his arm settle next to Wicky’s and let their fingers brush. 

Wicky won’t realise in the morning, so Ollie allows himself to have this. 

It’s the closest he’ll get to the real thing after all.

#:(( #i don't like writing them sad #so please believe that they wake up with their hands actually clasped together #and wicky #dumb idiotic wonderful wicky #takes it for a sign and kisses ollie #who flounders before kissing back and realising that he could have had this all along #(in some of my imaginings of this story #there's a more heartbreaking version of this where they have hooked up before #and wicky decided that they fully couldn't #but i can't allow ollie to be that sad and lonely) #ollie and wicks #olliewicks #omgcp #my writing #thank you so much syd!!! #syd tag!

[sheepishmastectomy]

so i can't sleep and i'm thinking about green arrow (1988) which i'm slowly working through & i wanna talk about dinah lance i'm sure other people have written this essay better and more thoughtfully than i will but the search feature on this site is garbage and all the reddits are down justifiably protesting the api shit so here goes

I can see what the author was initially trying to do, when he had Oliver kidnapped and tortured & Dinah rescued him. This was intended to parallel the traumatic incident Dinah experienced in The Longbow Hunters (which I have not read), which she was recovering from at the start of Green Arrow (1988). This is made obvious by the way Oliver was kidnapped, the attack, Dinah killing to save him (I believe? This was unclear to me), and the utilization of the same therapist. He deals with his trauma mostly in issue 33

However, the writer bungled this plotline in a variety of ways. I'm going to start with what I think is less obvious-- while Oliver deals with the trauma & it is very much about him, ultimately both attacks end up having an immense effect on Dinah. Oliver continues on after all of this goes down and is immediately distracted by being screwed over by the US government and then fucking off on a vision quest for a year. The trauma he experienced isn't allowed to have a lasting effect upon him & is instead transmuted into more trauma inflicted upon Dinah.

The arc that Dinah undergoes here does her a great disservice. I understand the story beats they were hitting here, but having her change her mind regarding having children for the very reasons she gave for not wanting them in the first place is mind-boggling. She goes from 'if you die, you will leave an orphan behind, and that's unacceptable-- we shouldn't have children if we're going to be irresponsible with our lives as vigilantes' to 'if you die, you will not leave an orphan behind, and i'll be so sad and lonely, so i need your child'. I get that Ollie was 'uniquely vulnerable' here, but having her reverse course when they have BOTH had countless life threatening experiences doesn't make any sense.

the way they portray it, too, like ollie's FINALLY getting everything he wanted because he just suffered enough in front of dinah-- like this is some big reward for him. (I hate the doorknob thing that recurs throughout the issue)

And then, OF COURSE, they spin this into a fucking infertility arc. Because they're brave enough to screw with her convictions, but they aren't brave enough to show the follow through-- instead they'll hold up Shado as an example of fertility, or whatever-- the woman who was pregnant and gave birth off screen, where she couldn't be unnattractive. Let alone all of the issues with Shado, who deserves so much better than she's been getting-- did they realize how weird it sounds for this super talented Japanese Archeress to be soooo overcome by sadness that she might have gotten Ollie killed that she just had to fuck him (I'm not dignifying the authors justification that this was sexual assault while Ollie was insensate because that was a cheap tactic deployed to absolve Ollie of guilt and wrongdoing in this instance-- he gets to have 'ninja babies' without having cheated on his girlfriend or even chosen to have sex… okay)

(the loss echoes here... lmao)

(dinah has this conversation outside in her underwear for... some fucking reason? i hate it here)

But transforming the trauma of this whole mess into fucking baby fever really pissed me off. There's been quite a few things the authors haven't handled well, but this was??? Rather than have them really and truly process their mirrored traumas and allow them to grieve in ways authentic to their characters, they twist Dinah into this tired infertile woman plot. It feels needlessly cruel-- she didn't want children but now abruptly she does (because you the author decided this) and then she has that yanked out from under her by an injury she apparently never realized was so serious (again because you the author decided this). It feels like she's being punished for ever daring to want to be childfree and responsible, instead of immediately falling over herself to incubate when her male partner wanted a baby.

I'm not even going to get into how when she was left alone by Ollie for a year after that, she waited for him and didn't date or anything. She finally, FINALLY went on a date with a guy & Ollie showed up right then and she kissed him right there??? They fucked immediately??? It's like she lost everything inside to be the perfect little fucktoy for our male lead. (and her cop boyfriend was secretly evil (read doing the same shit she and oliver do all the time) and also killed himself within days of ollie getting back into town so he wouldn't be in the way lmao)

The author responding to the letter columns spent a lot of time justifying his decisions when the debates occurred on them there, but it feels like he over identified with Oliver and made Dinah into a gratification vehicle above all else. Very frustrating given that she was handled fairly well up to that point??? Guess I should've seen the storm brewing with the Shado writing (once again, she deserves SO much better than she gets)

#green arrow (1988) #dinah lance #black canary #green arrow

[kiseiakhun]

Ask Meme: Roy Harper

First impression I was introduced to him via jayroy but I don't think I started shipping them until I learned more about Roy's character? Like I had seen a few jayroy works but I was more into jaydick at the time. And then I saw there was Drama about him and Kori being on a team with Jason and I was intrigued and started looking into his character. My first impression of him was that people were BIG MAD about him and I didn't know why, lol

Impression now You know those characters who are like. Not you. Like the things that have happened in their life, in their past are not like the things that have happened in yours, but at the same time they are you? Yeah. I attached and I attached HARD and there's no hope for me anymore. I just. I love him SO much. I love his abrasiveness and his self doubt and how he wraps his own issues in others, how he helps himself by telling other heroes who are lost and floundering the things that he wanted to hear. I love his irreverence and how he never backs down and his emotional volatility and his growth from a sad, lonely boy wrapped up in toxic masculinity and a fuckboy shell to a confident, self-actualized dilf. I joke but Roy is SO important to me. It's about how you can fix your mistakes. You don't have to be perfect. It's about how important it is to keep on trying even when the world seems poised to crush you. It's about how people can still love you even if you fuck up.

Like, I have Feelings about how DC kept fumbling with his character. They used his addiction to villainize him, they ruined his character so many times, they changed his life, his personality, his relationship with Ollie, his relationship with his friends, they changed the way people saw him and took away his most important relationships and it just. It doesn't stick. People love him too much. Even when he was gone, people were still fighting for him. They fought for him to get his daughter back. They fought for him to get his friends back. And it's like a meta commentary, almost? Like, no matter how much you change, people will still see to the core of you. They'll still love you. Am I looking too deep into this? Absolutely! He's a comic book character. This is about stupid comics. But ahhhhhh. I love Roy. I love every version of Roy, the New Earth Roy who had all that growth, the original Speedy who joined the Titans after the four had already made the team, the n52 sad twink Roy, the three(!!!) Roys in YJ. I love ALL THE ROYS. I want to put them in my pocket. I want to protect them. He's me but not me. He reminds me of the people in my life who I love. He's so interesting and dynamic and I love his character growth and I love him so much.

Favorite moment This goes waaaay way back but I love his first introduction to the Titans. Like, the moment he was first introduced in the Titans books. He was shooting FIRE ARROWS at the OLYMPICS and Dick and Garth and Wally and Donna were all like o: wow look at SPEEDY he is SO COOL and SO SEXY and we ALL WANT TO FUCK HIM but only Donna is allowed to say it. They were head over heels for him. All of them were like, "Speedy and his strong arms... his glistening skin... his cool shoes... I want to be cool like that. What a ravishing ravisher. I want to touch his body. I want him to ravish me." This is why I stick to the og Titans origins and not the later ones where Roy was an initial founder because it's SO FUNNY. IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. You can't improve on that. You just can't.

Idea for a story One day I'm going to write the story where Roy infiltrated Spyral instead of Dick. Still peeved that Dick got that story, tbh. Roy was perfect for the role! He used to be a spy! He had checkmate ties!! He operated ALONE for YEARS aslkfjsdkfj GRAYSON SHOULD'VE BEEN TITLED HARPER.

Unpopular opinion I reject the Outsiders conclusion that Roy is ~meant for the light~ and Dick is ~meant for the shadows~. Like idk if I'd go as far as to say it's the other way around but I DO think Roy handles moral ambiguity better than Dick. Idk if I want this for main comicverse Roy considering they're still foundering with him, but I would looove an elseworlds where he straddles the line. The convergence issue with him is actually a great example of what I mean - Roy is smart enough to outsmart his teammates and the villains and he can outfit Gotham with an arsenal (heh) of secret hidden weapons without anyone being none the wiser. Roy's as sneaky as a bat and everyone SHOULD know this but somehow they're surprised every time that it happens because he's so loud and open and honest otherwise. I love his sneaky tendencies and the unconscious manipulative habits he picked up from spending a childhood around Dick and then working years as a spy. I really wish they'd bring back that aspect of his character.

Favorite relationship I love his relationship with the Titans ;_; They own my whole heart. They love each other they hate each other they fight all the time. It's the found family polycule of my dreams that is perfect but also toxic but also perfect <3

Favorite headcanon Roy made money from camming when he first got Lian. It's the perfect job for him! You work from home, you can have irregular hours, people don't ask too many questions if you show up with unexplained bumps and bruises, etc. You cannot convince me that he got regular paychecks from his spy gig.

[ask meme]

#roy harper #anon #ask memes #asks #I love him a regular amount