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spiralcass · 6 months

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NEW X-MEN: THE ANIMATED SERIES - SEASON 3, EPISODE 4

We open in the past in The Facility, where a four year-old Laura is being cattle prodded. The woman doing this to her, her handler, Kimura is cackling as she does this to her. Laura is cringing with grit teeth.

KIMURA, pulling the prod away: “This isn’t a punishment, X-23. This is just training. But if you do make a sound or shed a tear, then I will have to punish you. And we don’t want that, do we?”

Laura clearly wants to cry and scream, but she holds herself together. Kimura calls her a good girl, and says she actually has a present for her for all her hard work.

RUFF!

Laura’s eyes widen as a Facility agent walks in a puppy. It leaps into Laura’s arms. The toddler is shocked by its warmth and affection as it licks her, and she can’t help but hug it.

KIMURA: “Meet your new best friend X-23. We care about him as we do you. So let’s not let anything happen to him.”

Laura, body shaking, nods as she continues to hold the puppy. Kimura grins evily.

12 years later, a much older Kimura is sneering, still in the Facility, as she watches news footage of Wolverine, Surge, and Hellion fighting against Sauron and a small army of dinosaurs in the streets of New York. Among the dinosaurs are clearly the adult members of the X-Men who’ve been transformed. There’s an ice pachycephalosaurus, a partially transparent velociraptor, and a black triceratops surrounded by sun particles.

While the others do crowd control on the dinos, Wolverine fights Sauron head on, as he shouts that this is only the beginning, and soon all of humanity will be turned into dinosaurs. The dinosaur man puts up a fight, but Laura soon puts him down for the count. With their victory secured and the rest of the dinosaurs KOd and restored to normal thanks to a compound developed by Danger, the kids celebrate among themselves. Hellion high-fives Wolverine before making out with Surge. Laura shakes her head at them both, while they both flip her off. Laura can’t help but laugh.

KIMURA, her sneer becoming a grin: “X-23, you are more impressive than ever. I think it’s time for you to come home.”

Sometime later, we cut to the indoor set of a music video, where dancers are rehearsing to the Washingtons’ latest single. Among the dancers, and in not entirely age-appropriate costumes, are Mercury and Bling!. They’re both doing just as well as the adult dancers and looking like they’re having a great time.

Among all the personnel involved in production, Laura stands by watching this. She’s stoic, only tapping her foot. A man comes up to her, assuming she’s a PA, and asks her to go fetch something for him. Laura growls and scares him off.

The song finishes, the director calls cut, and tells the girls to all take two before they run it again.

Cessily squeals as she bounces over to Roxy to take her hand. She can NOT believe this is just her life now.

ROXY, kissing Cessily’s neck: “Believe it, girl. This is it for as long as you want it to be.”

Cessily squeals even louder as she makes out with Roxy, briefly, before the two walk up to Laura, who has water bottles waiting for them. Cess and Roxy thank Laura.

LAURA: “Based on the choreography the director showed, I noticed seven errors between the two of you. Would you like me to list them?”

Cessily, used to this kind of thing from Laura by now, laughs it off and says they’ll leave that to the director himself.

LAURA: “OK. So…why am I here?”

Cessily explains that there’s no ulterior motive; she just wanted to hang out! It’s been a while since they did so without the rest of the group, she wanted to fix that, and she thought this would be fun.

Laura’s not sure this is her idea of fun. All these people, all these lights…it’s giving her a headache.

Roxy’s sorry about that, she thought she’d spent enough time in the real world to be able to handle it. Unlike Cess, she actually did have another motive here: she kinda thought she might wanna try showing off HER moves.

LAURA, surprised: “What?”

Roxy laughs and points out that Laura’s got the physique and finesse most dancers would kill for, not to mention how quickly she picks things up. She figured she might want to try joining them here. There’s only a year and a half left till graduation; does she still JUST want to be an X-Man?

ROXY, seeing Laura get flustered: “Hey, hey, don’t worry about it. I was just thinking, that all that pain you went through…could be to make something beautiful. That’s what art is.”

Laura is unsure what to make of this, but Cess tells her she has plenty of time to think. She has to get back to work, but Laura should really go check out the craft services table.

The director calls the girls back over, Cess and Roxy leaving Laura alone. Laura turns to the craft services tables.

LAURA: “Mmm. Shrimp.”

At the school, Brian and Quentin are playing video games together in the latter's room. Along with them is Sooraya, who looks extremely bored as the two boys play their game, sitting awkwardly in between them.

Sooraya questions if they maybe can't do something, anything, else. She has no work left to do for the day, and everyone else is busy.

BRIAN: "I'm still not sure how Nori thinks it's a good idea to join Julian in his Sofia hunt. I mean, they're dating now!"

QUENTIN AND SOO: "Disgusting."

BRIAN: "Exactly! And if they do find her, do they think she won't be pissed?"

Sooraya isn't worried there. Sofia has a temper, but she's still one of the sweetest people she's ever met; it's been over eight months and she'd understand.

Quentin's thoughts are far less positive. With his "Magneto was Right" poster in frame, he says that however sweet she may be, she's still the girl who spent two months pushing the narrative to millions that their supremacy was something to be cured and not respected. Brian jumps in to defend her, but Quentin isn't interested in debating this with biased parties.

Pausing the game, Quentin turns to Soo and tells her that, in regards to her original question, he actually could use her help with something. Soo tells him she may be willing to make a deal, and asks him what he needs.

Quentin scratches his neck, admitting he knows how this will sound based on…everything, but he means it: He has a crush on Sophie.

BRIAN AND SOORAYA: “WHAT?!”

And yes, yes, like he said, he knows. The Cuckoos have only ever been mean-spirited rivals or bullies, but he’s been seeing a therapist Iceman recommended to him, and, for a baseline, he’s really quite good. Dr. Garrison believes that he’s always pushed people away, not out of ego, but out of fear of being lied to; he suspects that Quentin’s telepathy may have always let him know that he was adopted, and he’s been carrying that anxiety with him. He said he’d seen that kind of thing before.

BRIAN: “And how does this tie back to you crushing on the girl who’d pour on gasoline if you were on fire?”

Quentin explains that he figured, if Garrison is right, perhaps that is the root cause of his less favorable views on women rather than what he believed to be intellectualism. So, last night, he performed telepathic surgery on himself, cutting those views out of his brain.

Brian and Soo are shocked and concerned by this, but Quentin assures them it’s fine; he’s a genius and it was totally safe. Even kind of fun. And by doing so, he’s realized that he doesn’t hate Sophie; he really, really likes her.

QUENTIN: “Hot, well-educated, my equal in telepathy…”

Quentin thinks that, among the girls in the group, Dust has the most common sense. The others may have more experience with romance, but he’d appreciate her help asking Sophie out since, well, he’s never even been close friends with a girl, let alone asked one out.

Dust isn’t sure this is a good idea. Brian also seems uneasy about this, but when Soo asks him what he thinks, Tag says, with a forced smile and Quentin looking eagerly at him, that friends help friends.

BRIAN: “But also, man, I trust you, but we need to stay close and make sure you didn’t break your brain.”

Quentin snort laughs and admits that’s fair.

Sooraya reluctantly agrees, swearing under her breath in Arabic; she knows this is going to backfire, but it beats more video games.

Outside the studio, Cessily and Roxy go out the back, on another break and making out.

ROXY, pressing Cess against a wall: “Have I ever told you I loved it when I’d get sick as a kid and everything would taste metallic?”

CESSILY, giggling: “No way.”

ROXY: “Can’t prove I’m lying.”

The two refocus on making out, Cess’s body becoming more liquid and Roxy sticking her hands inside.

CESSILY: “What did I do to deserve you?”

ROXY: “Be yourself.” Roxy boops Cessily’s nose. “My future X-Man.”

CESSILY: “You’re on the X-Men track too, now.”

ROXY: “But I’m nowhere near ready for, like, an actual fight. You so are.”

Cessily smiles with excitement. She’d love a real chance at that.

Suddenly, Mercury and Bling! are shot with tazer rounds. The girls are knocked out, as inconspicuous men in suits approach.

Not long later, Laura comes out, looking to find her friends.

LAURA: “The director is shouting like he’s going to kill someone. Based on his smell, he just might.”

However, there’s no sign of Cess or Roxy. Instead, all that’s left is a burner phone. It rings. Laura, suspicious, but needing to play along, picks it up and answers.

LAURA: “If you have hurt my friends, you are already dead.”

“X-23!”

The voice of Kimura makes Laura freeze and her eyes fill with terror.

KIMURA: “So nice to hear you still have that killer instinct. Everyone at the Facility was worried sick the X-Men had declawed you. Perhaps all the lies they’ve told you about being a person haven’t made you a less effective weapon. A pity. I was looking forward to re-training you from scratch.”

Laura cringes, as she thinks back to horrific moments from her childhood.

LAURA, composing herself the best she can: “Where are they?”

KIMURA: “Where they can be is safe back home at school…if you hand yourself back over to us.”

Laura, sounding terrified, tells Kimura she isn’t the little girl she used to torture anymore. She has friends. A team. Emma Frost, Magneto, or Iceman alone could bring the whole Facility down. Kimura is sure they could. But that’s what hostages are for! Not to mention the extra firepower they’ve received from their newest partner.

KIMURA: “I believe you know her as…War.”

Laura cringes, mumbling as she questions why the Horsemen are involved here. Kimura doesn’t love working with Mutants, but they sure are powerful. Famine has a mental lock on X-23; if she tries contacting the X-Men, or anyone, before coming to the meetup spot, Mercury and Bling! are dead.

Laura seethes, but she’s left with no choice.

LAURA: “Where?”

At the school, Emma is teaching the Cuckoos how to operate Cerebro, with Sophie presently sitting in the chair and wearing the helmet.

Emma gives a refresher on Cerebro, explaining how it's the X-Men's most valuable tool. Designed by Xavier, it's how they keep track of the Mutant population, find new ones in need or who could be potential allies, and stay alert of potential threats. And it can only be operated by exceptionally powerful telepaths. And with Xavier and Jean gone, and Betsy, Rachel, and Cable never around, she's presently the only X-Man trained to use it. In the unfortunate event anything ever happens to her, they need a backup.

Esme questions if this doesn't just make her expendable.

ESME: "If Mr. Summers ever cheats on you like all his other girlfriends and dumps you, the rest of the team will have no reason to keep you around."

Sophie tells her to not be so disrespectful, but Emma assures her it's fine; a little bite back isn't an issue. And yes, the team has wished her ousted multiple times, with Cerebro being a major reason she hasn't been, but look at the team now: Besides Ms. Pryde, all those who hated her are gone.

MINDEE, counting on her fingers, mumbling Warpath, Jean, and Storm's names: "Didn't you have something to do with all three of those departures?"

Emma smugly shrugs.

PHOEBE, smirking: "I guess Ms. Pryde should be afraid."

Sophie: "Phoebe, shut up. I need to focus."

Sophie closes her eyes and takes a deep breath as she's prompted by Emma to find her old student, Husk.

Her face squirms as she struggles to find her. She sees lots of grass. She can feel the sun of the heat. There's corn. So much corn. Why is there so much corn?!

Sophie: "Wait. I think I've got her. I think she's –"

QUENTIN, telepathically: "Hey Sophie!"

Sophie shrieks.

SOPHIE: "What are you doing in my head, geek?!"

The other Cuckoos' eyes glow as their lips curl in disgust. "Quentin."

QUENTIN, sounding casual and unusually upbeat: “I thought we were trying to be friends. And I’m not in your head; this is how telepaths should communicate, the way others wish they could.”

While the other Cuckoos mime vomiting or are otherwise grossed out, Sophie is mildly amused and she can’t deny he has a point. What does he want? Quentin explains that, now that they aren’t enemies, he’s come to appreciate Sophie, not just for her magnificent telepathic ability, but the confidence with which she leads her sisters, and, of course, her beauty. He knows he has steps he needs to take, but surely she can see some of his own greatness.

QUENTIN, as a telepathic projection in front of Sophie: “Would you want to go out with me sometime?”

Sophie appears stunned. The other Cuckoos slowly but surely break out into laughter, with Sophie eventually joining them. Quentin’s projection is heartbroken and, as it fades away, we transition to the real Quentin, who’s tearing up in his room, Brian and Soo at his side.

QUENTIN: “They’re laughing. They’re all laughing at me.”

SOORAYA: “I told you not to praise yourself.”

QUENTIN: “As if that was it! It doesn’t matter what I say, what I do, or what I can do. As long as I’m…this, girls like Sophie will never take me seriously.”

Brian tells him to try and calm down. It was just one rejection from one girl. And it’s Sophie. No one should want to date a Cuckoo unless they enjoy being walked on. Quentin snaps at Brian that he can’t be so dumb as to think this is the first time this has happened. The first time a hot girl has laughed at him. This is just the first time he got far enough to actually ask before it happened!

QUENTIN: “Thanks for nothing, Dust.”

SOORAYA, pissed and not about to take this: “I was helping you for nothing! Attempting to connect with her as a fellow telepath was your best bet.”

QUENTIN, eyes growing more intense “And what do you know? I don’t know why I even asked for your help when you’re barely a girl!”

Soo is about snap on him, her hands turning to sand, but Brian steps in to defend her first, shoving him and telling him to take that back and apologize immediately. And then they’re going to see Emma and the Cuckoos in person. Whatever he did to his brain, he is clearly so not okay.

Quentin insists he’s fine. He just clearly needs to figure things out on his own. Like always.

Quentin angrily storms out and slams the door. Checking to see if no one is looking, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a bottle of pills. He downs several of them before stuffing the bottle away.

Laura races through the studio, shoving and parkouring around everyone in her way. They’re freaked out and shriek.

Laura arrives in the dancers’ dressing room, where Laura grabs her duffel bag. She may not be able to contact the others, but she can still get her gear. Inside the bag is her Wolverine costume. Laura stares at it intently.

LAURA: “I am not X-23.”

Laura zips the bag back up and gets ready to go, but freezes as she sees who’s standing in the doorway: the Washingtons.

Roy appears mad, while Angel is worried.

ROY: “Something happened Roxanne, didn’t it? Cessily too?”

LAURA: “How did you know?”

ROY: “I have eyes. Roxanne never runs off without telling us. And if she did, she’d answer her phone.”

Further, this isn’t the first time something like this has happened.

ANGEL: “She was…kidnapped once when she was little. For ransom.”

ROY: “Only I know my baby girl can more than defend herself now from some two-bit thug.” He gets even more mad. “Do you know who took them? Is this an “X-Man” thing?”

LAURA, hanging her head: “I’m sorry. I’ll bring them back safe. I promise.”

Laura starts to walk out, but Roy gets in her way, sneering at her.

ROY: “If you don’t, I’ll do everything in my power to see that damn school shut down. You got that?!”

Angel holds him as he seethes in her soothing arms. It calms him a little. Laura doesn’t have anything else to say, only blankly staring at the married couple before dashing away.

At the school, Brian and Sooraya head to the cafeteria together. Soo is frustrated. She’s trying here, she doesn’t want to be mean, but Quentin is not making a good case for himself. He may not deserve to be picked on, but that doesn’t mean he fits as part of the gang. Brian counters that they used to be enemies with the Cuckoos; they just need to give him time.

Sooraya just doesn’t get it though. Why does Brian like him so much? She’s seen the softer side of the Cuckoos. She hasn’t seen that in Quentin.

SOORAYA: “What is he like in private?”

BRIAN: “Pretty much the same. Smiles more, I guess.”

SOORAYA: “I see. Not to be rude, but…why do you like him then?”

BRIAN: “I dunno. He’s cool. And he really is smart. We like a lot of the same stuff and…”

Brian trails as he smiles into the distance. Sooraya cringes in annoyance. The two get their food and sit down.

SOORAYA: “You like him.”

Brian stammers in denial, but he can’t hide it long. He laughs and admits that, yeah, he thinks Quentin is pretty damn cute.

BRIAN: “I know “I can fix him” isn’t something you should say about a guy you wanna hook up with but…” He shrugs.

SOORAYA, with judgmental eyes: “I must ask, Brian: Why do you keep falling for obnoxious rich white boys with psychic powers?”

BRIAN: “Guess I’ve got a type. That so wrong?”

Sooraya supposes not. And she is happy he’s over Julian. But then why is he helping Quentin with Sophie? Brian answers that he doesn’t think he’s got a shot; Quentin is definitely straight.

Brian asks Soo to keep his secret. He knows pretty much everyone but her would laugh at him for this. Soo agrees, but does encourage him to tell Quentin how he feels. Brian shakes his head at that, but thanks her anyway.

BRIAN: “I’ll find someone. One of these days, we need to find you a nice Muslim guy.”

SOORAYA: “That isn’t necessary.”

BRIAN: “Oh come on. You really don’t want a boyfriend?”

Soo flicks her wrist and coats Brian’s food in sand.

BRIAN: “Message received.”

Flying over New York City surrounded in a purple aura, Quentin is on the phone with his therapist, Dr. Garrison. He aggressively tells the doctor he’s sorry for calling without notice, but he just needs to talk right now. Fortunately, Dr. Garrison doesn’t mind.

DR. GARRISON: “I’m always available to my patients. Especially for my young, Mutant patients.” He takes on a more jovial tone. “Especially, especially, my young Mutant patients paying out of pocket.”

He gets a laugh out of Quentin.

We get our first look at Garrison during this exchange, the doctor a well-groomed Caucasian man in a suit, in the middle of pruning some flowers in his office.

Shaking, Quentin vents to Garrison that he’s just so angry…and scared. The pills he gave him sometimes do what he said they would - boosting confidence and lowering inhibitions - but it isn’t consistent, he’s still an annoying, ugly dork who lashes out, and his head feels so weird.

QUENTIN: “Please, Doctor. Help me.”

As Garrison sits down at his desk, he tells Quentin to try and breathe. Everything is okay. He told him these pills are still experimental. It may take some time for the effects to stabalize, but if he feels or thinks anything especially out of the ordinary, he should come to him immediately.

GARRISON: “To confirm, you haven’t told anyone else about Kick yet, right?”

QUENTIN: “No, sir. I made up some story about psychic surgery. My friends brought it.” Quentin weakly smiles. “Well, I think Dust and I are friends now.”

Garrison is happy to hear that. As for Quentin’s other concern, he recommends more than medication. He sees himself as an “ugly dork”? Quentin has the money and means to look and be and do whoevever and whatever he wants, “for the next year, at least”.

GARRISON: “If you wish to win the fair Cuckoo’s heart, become the man she wants.”

Quentin is not just put at ease, but excited by this recommendation. He thanks Dr. Garrison, who of course assures him it’s his pleasure, and wishes Quentin luck. They hang up.

Quentin grins as he stares down at his phone…until his face falls.

QUENTIN: “No.”

Quentin flies off at super speed.

QUENTIN: “NO!”

Wolverine, now in costume, races up the steps of a skyscraper. She stops only to sniff a familiar scent. She’s shaken and momentarily freezes up, but she can’t be afraid.

WOLVERINE: “She’s just a woman. You are Wolverine. Not a weapon.”

Laura races up the remaining steps and reaches the sunset lit rooftop, where Kimura is waiting, along with multiple armed soldiers. A helicopter is in the air above them.

KIMURA: “X-23! So glad you came without any fuss. You always were good at following orders.”

Laura snarls.

LAURA: “Where are they?”

Kimura gestures with her head up at the helicopter. If X-23 wants them freed, she’ll surrender without a fight. Wolverine demands Kimura let her friends go first, but Kimura sees no reason why she should.

KIMURA: “Even if you could beat me, Famine can crush your brain at any moment.”

Laura questions what the facility is even doing working with the Horsemen; they want to kill ALL baselines. The thing is, Kimura doesn’t really care if they do. Especially not when she and Lady Akkaba have something in common.

KIMURA: “I don’t know what you did to earn her wrath, but she wants you to suffer as much as I do.”

Kimura cackles. Why is she so tense? She should be thrilled to be going home so she can come get back to doing what she does best.

Laura takes note of all her enemies and surroundings. She breathes.

WOLVERINE: “I am not your weapon. I am Wolverine.”

Wolverine dashes around the rooftop, effortlessly disabling all of Kimura’s men with precise stabbing before dashing toward Kimura. Kimura grins with excitement and takes Laura on, glad she’s resisting.

KIMURA: “Do you really think the Halloween costume makes you seem like more of a person? It only shows how desperate you are to be something you never can be.”

Kimura actually proves to be something of a match for the snarling, non-vocal Laura, with Kimura asking X-23 if she likes the enhancements she’s gotten, granting her super strength to complement her martial ability and shield her from harm.

Wolverine answers by slashing her across the face, leaving bloody marks.

WOLVERINE: “Not a great shield.”

Kimura angrily kicks Laura away, pulling a gun on her with one hand, and raising her hand to her earpiece with her other, her manic grin not fading.

KIMURA: “One more move and the girls die!”

WOLVERINE: “Coward.”

KIMURA: “No. Just above this.”

Laura narrows her eyes.

WOLVERINE, retracting her claws: “Let them go.”

Kimura shoots a net at Laura, ensnaring and electrocuting her.

KIMURA: “No. I think I’d rather torture all of you.”

Kimura laughs as Laura screams.

In Cerebro, Mindee is getting her turn on the device and not doing such a good job, as she keeps getting distracted by other minds near her targets that she finds interesting. Emma sighs in disappointment, as while Esme has yet to get her turn, Celeste and Phoebe also failed to impress. So far, barring some initial difficulty, only Sophie has excelled.

Sophie smugly pumps her shoulders. Esme rolls her eyes at her.

ESME: “Mindee, get up! It’s my turn!”

MINDEE: “Not yet! I still need to locate–”

“MS. FROST!”

Quentin bursts in, covered in sweat. The Cuckoos wrinkle their noses in disgust. Emma, less rudely, questions Quentin if everything is alright.

QUENTIN: “Of…of course it isn’t. I tried finding Magneto and Cyclops, but they’re not here!” Quentin holds up his phone. “Look!”

Emma and the Cuckoos all appear distraught as they see what he shows them: Mutant fashion designer Jumbo Carnation has been found murdered.

Emma offers genuine condolences, a fan of the man’s work herself and aware that Quentin was as well, and promises that the X-Men will get justice for him, but Quentin slaps her hand away as she reaches out to him. He doesn’t want condolences!

QUENTIN: “This keeps happening! Over and over again! What is “justice”? Getting Purifiers and U-Men safely locked away so they can get out and put more little girls’ brains in jars? Storm humiliating another pig? How is it justice if it never ends?!”

Emma, sensing how sensitive this moment has become, takes on a more stoic demeanor. The Cuckoos, meanwhile, now actually appear intrigued by and interested in Quentin’s shift in attitude.

Emma tells Quentin that they’re aware the climate remains horrid, but she and the other headmasters are doing everything in their power to change that.

QUENTIN: “Everything in your power? Spare me.I know what Apocalypse was doing a few weeks ago, and I know it was you three who stopped him.” With heavy breath, he hangs his head. Emma squints her eyes at Quentin citing knowledge he shouldn’t have. “Magneto wouldn’t have done that before coming here.”

EMMA: “Nor would I have. But we are better than we were.”

QUENTIN: “Better at failing Mutants! Would you have made the same choice if it was all monkeys who were going to die?!”

Emma tells him that’s enough. She understands his grief, but this type of language is unacceptable. She knows Dr. Garrison and respects his work, but clearly that isn’t enough. And from the way he’s sweating, she’d also like him to see Danger for a medical examination.

QUENTIN: “You mean the machine that murdered one of my classmates?”

EMMA: “Danger did not kill Wind Dancer.”

QUENTIN: “If she’d had her powers, she wouldn’t have been picked off by War!” Emma and the Cuckoos react with shock and horror. Quentin laughs. “You didn’t know, did you?” He shoots a dirty look at Sophie. “Whatever.” Her turns around and walks off with a sneer on his face. “I see who the problem is here.”

Emma is concerned, but the Cuckoos are entranced.

In the past, four year-old Laura is in her room, playing with her puppy. Petting him, getting licked by him, and wrestling a little.

Suddenly, her eyes sharpen.

Kimura is sure to be walking by as Laura screams in horror. Arriving on the scene, Kimura and the audience see that Laura’s claws are out, tears are running down her face, and the puppy has been gruesomely torn apart.

KIMURA: “Now look at the mess you’ve made, X-23. I ordered you to take good care of him.” She draws a gun and shoots Laura repeatedly. “I suppose I should blame myself. A beast cannot be trusted with friends.”

Laura lies on the ground, riddled with bullets, crying over what a monster she is.

In the present, Laura wakes up…stripped of her costume and back in her old cell. She rages out and claws at the walls, but it’s no use. Over a speaker Kimura laughs at her. She tells X-23 she should relax. She’s home safe, and she’s never letting her out of her sight again.

LAURA: “Let them go! Let me go!”

Kimura isn’t about to go against what’s best for her weapon, but, as a consolation, she will let her see Mercury and Bling.

A screen on the wall turns on, and shows Mercury and Bling! in tubes. The girls are being tortured, as Cessily is being streteched out and torn apart, and Roxy is having her diamond skin forcibly ripped and peeled off.

Laura, hysterically, demands that Kimura stop this. This has nothing to do with them. If she doesn’t let them go, she’ll kill her and everyone else here!

KIMURA: “I’m afraid it’s your own fault for trying to be something you aren’t, X-23. If these poor girls must suffer to make you understand your place, then so be it.”

Laura continued to claw away at the walls, but to no effect.

Over a guardrail, Kimura grins down at the laboratory where men in labcoats are torturing the girls, and collecting their mercury and diamonds. In the corner, Death idly stands by, uninterestied in the proceedings as he sharpens his katana.

Back in his room, Quentin’s sweating and heavy breathing have only gotten worse. He’s jittering and bikning rapidly as he looks all around him.

He pulls out his bottle of Kick from his pocket and downs more pills. When he hears Brian knocking, he it back in his jacket’s pocket.

From the other side of the door, Brian asks Quentin if he’s okay.

BRIAN: “You stormed off earlier, and some of the guys said they saw you not looking too good. Do you want to talk?” Brian waits for an answer as Quentin buries his head in his knees. “I heard about Jumbo too. I’m sorry.”

Still no response from Quentin.

BRIAN: Listen, man…I know today’s pretty bad. Things aren’t going your way. But I wanna help you. If you just open up, everyone will want to help you. You gotta let us in though. I don’t want anything to happen to you.” No response. Brian bangs his fist on the wall. “Whenever you’re ready.”

Brian slumps away. Quentin screams and destroys half his room with a telekinetic wave.

In the Facility, Laura refuses to relent, even as escape from her room seems impossible, so no matter how she claws at the walls around her.

The screen turns off.

Laura freaks out, ceasing her attack and demanding to know what’s happening. A trapdoor opens underneath her, dropping Laura into a pit in the laboratory. Laura immediately attempts to leap out, but hits her head on a one-way invisible forcefield. The uncaring and amused scientists stare down at her.

Laura demands to know if the others are still alive. Kimura confirms to her that they are…and thanks to them, they have some fun new toys they’d like X-23 to play with.

Laura stands alert, unsure of what’s happening as a whole pens up in the wall of the other side of the pit, and she hears a loud rumbling. From the hole emerges a massive, artificial beast covered in mercury and purple diamond.

KIMURA: “Allow me to introduce, the Predator X. Made from Mutants to kill Mutants.”

Along with its metal skin and diamond projectiles, it also possesses Laura’s stregnth, durability, and healing factor. They had oodles of her DNA they didn’t want to go to waste.

KIMURA: “I’d like you to test my new pet. If it kills you, then you’ve been rendered obsolete. If you kill it, then maybe, just maybe, I’ll be sporting and let your friends go home.”

Laura silently nods, turning to face the Predator and clanging her claws. There’s no fear in her eyes, only determination.

The sub five foot tall girl and the several ton behemoth race toward each other and clash.

In a bathroom at the school, Quentin looks himself in the mirror, a complete mess. Garrison’s words about him having the means to be whoever and whatever he wants ring in his head. He’s ready.

In a montage, Quentin shaves his head, toss in some purple dye, trades out his glasses for less dorky ones, and goes on a shopping spree to switch up his wardrobe, drawing his button down, sweater vest, slacks, and ugly shoes. In the end, looking at himself in a mirror at an expensive clothing store, he now sports a purple mohawk, an oversized graphic t, a blazer, shorts, exposed socks, and doc martens. He’s exceedingly proud of himself.

Out on the streets of New York in the middle of the night, a group of men exit a bar, laughing a little drunk, and talking about the movie they saw earlier. Their eyes flash purple as they’re compelled to walk into a nearby alley. They regain alertness as they’re greeted by the young man who brought them here.

QUENTIN: “It must be nice. To be able to wash the blood off your hands, catch a flick, and a drink with the boys. It’s satisfying, itsn’t it? Knowing you’ll never be punished.”

The men laugh at him. Who is this dork? One of the others’ heads feels weird. Is this dork some mutie messing with them?!

QUENTIN: “I am not a dork. Not anymore. I am Mutant. And proud.”

The men’s noses all start bleeding. They freak out, questioning what Quentin is doing.

QUENTIN: “Although you’ll find I’m not like the Mutant you brutally murdererd. The police may not care to look into this, but I can see inside the heads of this entire city.” The men fall to their knees and cough up blood. “Jumbo Carnation had four arms and plastic skin. He couldn’t hurt anyone. I could hurt all those heads with a thought.” The men’s necks begin to twist as they beg for mercy. “He was a lover. An artist.” The three necks are snapped and the men killed. “I’m gonna be an X-Man.”

Quentin stands over the dead bodies. For a moment, everything is quiet.

Quentin vomits, collapsing to ground. His eyes panic, his body shakes, all his confidence abandons him, and all he can think is…

QUENTIN: “What have I done?”

Back in the Facilty, Laura fights the Predator X. Despite its size, the beast is equally as fast as Laura, putting her on the run, dodging not only its claws and giant teeth, but projectile diamond shards.

KIMURA: “Since when do you run away, X-23? Have the X-Men taught you that’s something you’re allowed to do?”

Laura keeps leaping around the pit until she finds her opening, gouging out the monster’s eyes with her claws, and pulling herself up to kick her foot-claws through its nostrils. She leaps off and, not wasting a second, stabs its ears.

Jumping back, all of the Predator’s senses temporarily disabled, Laura smirks up Kimura.

LAURA: “Should have gone for adamantium.”

Laura jumps back at the Predator at tears it apart until regeneration isn’t an option for it.

Laura pants, covered in blood, gust, and mercury.

LAURA: “Nothing you say can hurt me. Nothing you throw at me can beat me. I was the best you were ever getting. Now…let them go.”

Kimura and Laura stare each other down. Until…

KIMURA: “Very well. Your friends, as well as you, are free to go.”

Laura is deeply confused. Kimura tells Laura to at least try to use that animal brain of hers. She never planned on keeping her! That’d be ridiculous! Laura had it right; Magneto could kill her and all her associates without breaking a sweat, and holding his students it just asking for it.

KIMURA: “I just wanted to advance and test my little project, and see you again for old time’s sake. I hope you had as much fun as I did.”

Laura squints her eyes, not trusting this for a second, but without other options but to play along.

We cut to outside the fence of this normal looking government building in the middle of nowhere. Laura, Cessily, and Roxy are all walking away, the latter two shaken to their core. The girlfriends are clinging to each other with haunted looks in their eyes, pieces of Roxy missing and Cessily unable to go fully solid. They walk in silence for a bit.

CESSILY: “Thank you, Laura. For saving us. Again.”

ROXY: “Yeah. I wasn’t fully conscious for all that, but you killed that thing like it was nothing.

Laura tells them not to worry about it. She’s an X-Man. Keeping them safe if her job. She’s just relieved that they–

Laura is cut off as a visible to the audience aroma surrounds Laura’s nose. She sniffs.

We cut back to the past, and see that this same aroma surrounded Laura’s nose before she killed her puppy.

In the present, Laura freezes and her eyes sharpen.

CESSILY: “Laura? Are you okay?”

Laura spins around and slashes through Cessily. Cessily screams and Roxy panics, as Laura pops out her claws, ready to kill.

Inside the building, Kimura laughs at what’s happening that’s being livestreamed to her on a screen.

KIMURA: “Poor X-23. Forgot her old trigger scent.”

In the alley, Quentin in on his knees as rain has started pouring down. On his phone, leaves a voice message for Dr. Garrison. He did something bad, something he knows he shouldn’t have done, but he had to take his advice, and be who he wanted to be. He couldn’t pretend to be powerless anymore. He couldn’t spend his whole life a victim. He’s sorry.

Sitting at his desk with the lights off, Dr. Garrison listens to the voice message as it’s coming in, but he doesn’t pick up. He curls his lip and taps his finger on his desk.

Back in the alley, Quentin tosses his phone away, and apologizes to the dead bodies. Off in the distance, someone calls his name. Quentin tries and fails to put himself together as the voice becomes clearly Brian and, moments later, Tag arrives on the scene.

TAG: “I got your message! What’s going on?! Are you–?”

Brian freezes as he arrives in the alley, horrified by the sight in front of him.

BRIAN: “What did you do?”

Quentin uses telekinesis to help him stand.

QUENTIN, still hysterical: “I…I found the men who killed Jumbo. I…oh god, Brian, please help me.”

Brian is still in shock, but he’s been trained for this kind of thing. He promises Quentin it’s gonna be okay and reaches out a hand to him. Quentin takes it. Brian assures him he isn’t mad. These racist murderers deserved it. He just didn’t expect this. But it’s okay. Two of their headmasters have killed people. Soo and Laura have killed people.

BRIAN: “This doesn’t make you bad or a monster or whatever you’re thinking. Okay?”

Quentin nods furiously and quietly thanks him. Brian assures him it’s gonna be okay. They just need to call Ms. Frost and–

QUENTIN: “No!’ He pulls away. “No one can know about this. They all already hate me. This…this is all I have left.” He grips Brian by the collar of his raincoat. “I’ve been blocking the minds of everyone around us. We’re invisible. But I don’t…I don’t trust myself right now. Make everyone run away. And keep making them run until we find a place get rid of the bodies.”

BRIAN: “I can’t do that, man. We have to tell the teachers and let them sort this out.”

QUENTIN, sneering: “You said you want to help me. So help me. Aren’t you supposed to be my friend?”

There’s a dramatic pause as Brian thinks. And he decides that he can’t say no.

BRIAN: “Yeah.” He hugs Quentin.”I’m your friend.”

Quentin hugs him back.

Outside the Facility, base, Cessily and Roxy are terrified as Laura stares them down with an animalistic look in her eyes. Roxy holds the further injured Cessily.

CESSILY: “Laura…Laura, whatever they did to you…you don’t need to–”

Laura silently moves to attack again, but Bling! And Mercury leap out of her way. Laura jumps at them again, but Cessily grows a shield out of herself around them, one which self-regenerates and which the frenzied Laura isn’t capable of thinking a way around.

Roxy is panicking. She can barely move or think straight right now. How is she supposed to fight? Even if she could, this is LAURA. They can’t stop her!

ROXY: “I don’t want to die! I don’t wanna die, I don’t want my parents to bury me. But I can’t do this!”

Cessily is just as scared, she’s still incapable of going solid, and she’s only bring hurt more and more by Laura’s attacks. But Laura needs help, Roxy needs to be kept safe, and she’s the only one here.

CESSILY: “Don’t worry, baby.” Cessily’s face fills with determination. “I can.”

Laura’s assault on the girls is finally halted as a spike thrusts out of Mercury’s shield and skewers her. And before Laura can recover, Cessily, screaming with tears in her eyes, takes down her shield and uppercuts Laura with her fist shapeshifted into an anvil, sending her back flying.

Mercury stands.

MERCURY: “I’m finishing what you started, Laura. I’m getting us all home. Even if I have to get through you to do it.”

In the common area of the school, Brian sits alone, jittering and drinking hot chocolate. He’s silently mortified by what he’s done, and the possibility of people finding out.

“It’s past curfew, Mr. Cruz.”

Emma, in her nightgown, gets the attention of Brian, who jumps in shock.

BRIAN, still shaken: “You scared me, Ms. Frost. Sorry. I lost track of time.”

Emma looks at him curiously as she sits down next to him.

EMMA: “It’s rare to see you without one of your squadmates. Is something bothering you?”

BRIAN, smiling: “You know one advantage of not having a power to train?” He taps his head. “Plenty of time to train up here. Can’t make myself smarter than I am, but I bet I could keep even you from getting in without a fight.”

Emma takes a moment to think over that response. She tells him that they’ve never really spent any time outside of class together, and that’s fine, they don’t have a thing in common and Iceman suits him as a role model, but he’s still her advisee; she’d like to help if she can.

EMMA: “Did something happen with Quentin?”

Brian hangs his head and twiddles his thumbs.

BRIAN: “How do you know when a bad thing is worth doing?”

EMMA, after a moment to think: “Not an encouraging question. Nor one Iceman would have been suited to answer.”

Emma tells him that the line between good and evil is not a steady nor clear one. Even now, Cyclops would probably disagree there, but to her, the line is faded and ever-moving, and holding yourself to it in a single spot and pretending you can see it clearly is an easy way to drive yourself mad. And each person also has their own line.

EMMA: “If you feel what you did was right, if you can lay in your bed and fall asleep with ease, and if you haven’t harmed those who are innocent…you shouldn’t worry yourself.”

BRIAN: “Even if it’s against school rules?”

EMMA: “Even if it’s against the law.”

Emma rests a hand on his shoulder before standing up.

EMMA: “You were wrong by the way. It wasn’t hard to get inside your head.” Brian bangs his fist against his forehead. Emma smiles. “But you’re getting there.” Brian smiles. “Loyalty is a valuable asset, Tag. Do not undersell that part of you. Mum’s the word on your inappropriate heroism, provided it doesn’t happen again. I may not disagree with it, but it’s still a mess I have to clean up. And in the morning, let Quentin know he will no longer be seeing Dr. Garrison. It was a good idea on Robert’s part, but clearly, he needs a…Mutant touch.”

Brian, still confused, manages to widen his smile.

BRIAN: “Thank you, Ms. Frost.”

Emma orders him to his room, wishes him good night, and tells him, if this does ever happen again, to please find an incinerator.

Brian laughs…but as she exits the room, he sneers and backhands his mug off the table, shattering it.��

Back at the facility, Mercury fights Laura with blades for arms. Mercury’s movements are sloppy, but against a foe in a berzerker rage, that isn’t an automatic death sentence. Still, in speed, she’s just barely able to keep up with her.

Mercury juts a pillar out of her chest to send Laura flying back and immediately stretches out her arms to grab her, pick her up high into the air, and slam her back down into the ground.

Bling! Is in awe of what her girlfriend is managing to do. Cessily giggles, proud of herself, before grunting in deep pain as she jiggles, her form still unstable.

CESSILY: “Ahh!”

Laura rushes her once more, with Cessily embracing her instability and turning into a puddle for Laura to slip on. With Laura lying on top of her, Cessily locks her down with metal restraints.

ROXY, in disbelief: “Babe! You know I always believed in you, but when did you learn to do this?!”

CESSILY, as a face in the puddle: “You think I wasn’t training while you were busy over break?”

They can’t celebrate yet though. They have to figure out a way to fix Laura. Cessily can’t hold her for much longer, and she doesn’t think she can knock her out.

Roxy, still in pain, tries to figure out what could have been done to her. Maybe some implant in her brain, or brainwashing or…

ROXY: “Do you smell that?”

Cessily isn’t sure what she’s talking about. She doesn’t smell anything. Roxy points out that’s just it. Cess has drawn blood from Laura. She should be able to smell that. But she can’t.

ROXY: “Dr. McCoy taught me all about different kinds of mind control. All theoretical, of course. He mentioned once that people could hypothetically be conditioned to be controlled by certain scents.”

CESSILY, Laura breaking free: “Worth checking! Oh this is gonna be gross.”

Cessily shapeshifts her entire body into liquid and goes right up Laura’s nostrils to clog her nose.

Laura is disoriented, but with Cessily in her nose, she turns her attention toward Roxy. Laura rushes her, unphased as a terrified Bling! riddles her with diamond shares. Roxy can only shield her face with her arms as Laura comes in for the kill…but Laura passes out before she can make a move.

Cessily exits Laura’s nostrils and, repeating “Eww” on repeat takes the most humanoid form she can. Roxy breathes heavily with relief as she holds Cessily.

CESSILY, weakly: “We…We did it.”

ROXY: “Damn right we did.”

CESSILY: “Is it wrong if I say that going up her nose was worse than the torture?”

ROXY: “Oh, baby girl. Yes.”

In his room, Quentin is fast asleep in bed. He’s awoken by a quintet of identical voices.

“Quentin, wake up.”

“We want to talk.”

“Come on.”

“Get up.”

“Now!”

Quentin jolts awake. He sneers. What do the Cuckoos want now? For him to not even have peace in his sleep?

The Cuckoos giggle and tell him to meet them in Cerebro.

Although skeptical of the girls, Quentin goes to the desired location, where the Cuckoos are waiting for him. Apart from Sophie, the Cuckoos appear either excited by his new look, or downright horny, biting their fingers and undressing him with their eyes.

Quentin demands they tell him what’s going on.

SOPHIE: “We heard what you said.”

PHOEBE: “We know what you did.”

ESME: “And we like it.”

The Cuckoos aren’t sure what’s gotten into Quentin, but this is a version of him they’d definitely like to get to know better.

Quentin snorts. He supposes he should be grateful they’re not going to rat him out, but still, what, get to know him better as a friend.

SOPHIE: “The five date as one. And our guru has us all working on ourselves.”

CELESTE: “So the five aren’t dating any one.”

MINDEE: “But we are interested.”

SOPHIE: “And we do support what you did. Even if the rest of our friends may not, we want you to know…”

ESME: “...you aren’t alone.”

Quentin turns around to see a group of other Mutants filing into Cerebro. There are three familiar characters, Glob, Martha, and Ernst, and three background characters comic fans will recognize: Radian, Tattoo, and Redneck.

Quentin smirks and menacingly adjusts his glasses.

Outside the front door of Roxy’s penthouse, Roy and Angel hold Roxy and Cessily tight, so relieved the girls are okay.

ROY: “You stay strong?”

ROXY, grunting in pain a little: “Of course, dad.”

ANGEL, kissing Cessily’s forehead: “Thank you for protecting our baby, Cessily. You are family. You know that, right?”

ROY, with a smirk: “She will be when she puts a ring on it.”

ROXY, embarrassed: “Dad! 16!”

Everyone laughs, as Cessily blushes.

The Washingtons try to get the girls inside for some tea, but they have to take care of one more thing; they’ll be right back.

Outside the building, Laura is standing in the rain. Cessily and Roxy come out, telling her to come inside; they can all head back to the institute tomorrow.

Laura glares at the two.

LAURA: “You were kidnapped because of me. You were tortured because of me. And I almost killed you both…because that’s all I can do.”

Cess steps forward telling her that’s not true, but Laura shouts at Cess to not take another step. She’s sorry, but Kimura was right. She’s not a person. And she’ll only ever hurt the people she gets close.

LAURA: “Julian…Sofia…and now you.”

She tells them to tell Soo and the others she’s sorry she isn’t saying goodbye, but she can’t go back to the X-Men; she quits.

They both shout at her to stop, running after her as she walks away, but Laura shuts them both down.

LAURA: “Don’t follow me. You won’t get lucky again while I’m in control.”

Cessily and Roxy can’t do anything but hold each other as Laura runs off into the night, tears in her eyes.

In the Facility laboratory, Kimura is pleased with how things have turned out. She was hoping using the trigger scent to make X-23 kill her friends would break her emotionally, make the X-Men turn on her, and make her easy to take back for good, but even if she does wish the other Mutie girls were dead, she still got valuable material and data for improving the Predator X, and X-23 has still broken herself off from the X-Men.

KIMURA: “There’s nothing stopping me now from retrieving her and keeping her here forever. Then, I will make her regret the day she ever crossed me. I’ll scratch her eyeballs out as many times as I need to until she begs to be blinded, and then I’ll–”

Kimura is cut off. She gasps as blood spits out of her mouth. Looking down, she sees she’s been run through with a katana. All around her, she sees the scientists have all either been cut down in an instant, or reduced to piles of ash.

Death leans in next to Kimura’s shocked face.

DEATH: “Lady Akabba sends her regards.”

Death rips his sword out of her and kicks her to the floor.

DEATH: “She thanks you for your efforts, but she has her own plans for Wolverine. For what it’s worth, I enjoyed watching her squirm.”

Death sheathes his katana and pulls out his lighter. Lighting it up, he tosses it at the computers to set them aflame. If Kimura is truly stronger than most humans, she shouldn’t have a problem escaping a burning building with a hold in her esophagus.

Kimura swears at him that this isn’t over, that he doesn’t know who he’s dealing with, and that the horsemen will all pay. Death pays her no mind.

Instead, Death takes out his phone and sends a text to Lady Akabba, informing her the job is done.

On her throne in Egypt, Lady Akabba is pleased with his report.

LADY AKABBA: “Apologies. I was dealing with another matter.”

“No apologies necessary…” Knelt before her, we see Dr. Garrison in one of the cult robes. “...my lady.”

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sofiamantegafan110 · 5 months

Text

NEW X-MEN EPISODE 6

EPISODE 6- MURDER MYSTERY AT XAVIER'S

THE USS O’HALLAHAN IS A SUPER YACHT, USED TO HOST THE FAMED CHICAGO SINGER AND SEDUCTRESS, CESSILY O’HALLAHAN’S MOST EXCLUSIVE SHOWS. RIGHT NOW, IT PLIES THE WATERS OF LAKE MICHIGAN WITH A BEVY OF EXCLUSIVE CLIENTS ABOARD.

CUT TO THE MAIN PERFORMANCE HALL, A LAVISH AND SPLENDID ROOM WITH A SPARKLING CRYSTAL CHANDELIER THAT HANGS ABOVE THE CENTER OF THE ROOM WITH DINETTE TABLES LITTERING THE FLOOR, ALONG WITH SEMI-PRIVATE BOOTHS ALONG THE EDGES. THE VIPS ARE ABLE TO SIT UP IN BALCONIES PLACED ABOVE THE OTHERS WITH ALL OF THIS, OF COURSE, FACING THE ORNATE STAGE WITH ITS HEAVY MAROON CURTAINS AND ROBUST MOOD LIGHTING. FRAMED PORTRAITS LINE THE WALLS AND THE TABLES ARE SET WITH REAL SILVER AND CRYSTAL.

CUT TO THE BACKSTAGE OF THE THEATER, WHICH IS A BIT MORE SUBDUED. A ROW OF MIRRORS AND VANITIES LINE ONE WALL WITH ONE IN PARTICULAR BEING LARGER AND SET APART FROM THE OTHERS, DECORATED WITH THE FLOWERS OF CESSILY’S ADMIRERS. HER PURSE SITS ATOP IT, ALONG WITH A FEW DRAWERS, SOME LOCKED, SOME NOT, THAT HOLD THE THINGS A SUPERSTAR NEEDS TO GET READY. A RACK OF COSTUMES IS LOCATED ON THE OPPOSITE WALL, AND A FEW TRUNKS BENEATH THEM.

CUT TO THE HALLWAY, RATHER SHORT AND NONDESCRIPT. IT HAS SOME PAINTINGS HERE AND THERE ALONG ITS LENGTH, AT LEAST ONE OF THEM WORTH ITS WEIGHT IN GOLD. BEYOND THAT AND THE PLUSH CARPETING, IT MOSTLY JUST CONNECTS ALL THE QUARTERS AND STATEROOMS ON THIS LEVEL, AS WELL AS THE ENGINE AND ELECTRICAL ROOMS, WITH A STAIRWAY THAT LEADS UP ON DECK AND THE BRIDGE.

THE CREW’S QUARTERS CONSIST OF EIGHT BEDS AND A LOCKER AT THE END OF EACH. A SMALL DOOR LEADS TO A LITTLE STATEROOM FOR THE SHIP’S CAPTAIN, WHERE THE BACKUP NAVIGATIONAL PLOTTERS ARE STREWN ACROSS THE DESK. THERE’S A SMALL BOOKCASE THERE, AS WELL AS A LOCKED STORAGE TRUNK AND A LOCKER WITH UNIFORMS IN IT.

CESSILY’S STATEROOM IS LARGER THAN ANY OTHER LIVING SPACE, NATURALLY. THE MASTER SUITE CONSISTS OF TWO ADJOINING ROOMS. THE FIRST ONE LEADS INTO A SMALL OFFICE AREA WITH A DESK NEATLY ARRANGED WITH PAPERS, BOOKS, AND LEDGERS, A FEW COMFORTABLE CHAIRS AND A COUCH PLACED ALONG ONE WALL. THE SECOND ROOM IS THE BOUDOIR WITH A LARGE SOFT BED, A SPACIOUS CLOSET, A LITTLE BATHROOM ON THE SIDE AND SOME PERSONAL PICTURES AND SHELF SPACES IN THE BEDROOM ITSELF.

THE CABINS OF THE GUESTS ARE ALL PRETTY SIMPLE, AND THERE’S ONE FOR EACH GUESTS. WHAT SECRETS HIDE WITHIN THEM? WE MAY NEVER KNOW! EACH ONE IS TASTEFULLY DECORATED WITH A SMALL LOCKER FOR PERSONAL EFFECTS, A SINGLE, BUT COMFORTABLE, BED, A VERY SMALL SHELF, AND A READING LIGHT.

CUE INTRO AND CREDITS

THE XAVIER SCHOOL FOR GIFTED YOUNGSTERS PRESENTS… A MURDER MYSTERY PARTY: MURDER ON LAKE MICHIGAN! IT ALL BEGINS ONE CALM AND STARRY NIGHT…

NAMELY THE ROARING TWENTIES, ABOARD A CRUISE SHIP ON LAKE MICHIGAN NEAR THE TAIL-END OF PROHIBITION.

ALL THE PARTICIPANTS ARE DRESSED IN PERIOD-APPROPRIATE CLOTHING, AND YET LOOK OTHERWISE LIKE THEMSELVES IN THE PERFORMANCE HALL OF THE CRUISE SHIP. AT THE CENTER STAGE IS CESSILY O’HALLAHAN HERSELF, LOOKING A LOT LIKE CESSILY KINCAID IF SHE HAD A 1920’S COIF AND SHORT CURLY HAIR WITH BICEP-LENGTH OPERA GLOVES AND A KILLER DRESS THAT SHIMMERS IN THE LIGHT WHENEVER SHE MOVES.

SITTING FARTHER AWAY FROM THE OTHERS IS TALIA RICHEAUVILLE (PLAYED BY NOCTURNE), WHOSE EXPRESSION SHIFTS TO SOMETHING VERY MYSTERIOUS. SHE HAS AN EYE PATCH OVER ONE EYE, EVEN THOUGH SHE DOESN’T NEED ONE, AND SHE’S DRESSED IN A LONG BLACK COAT WITH AN ELEGANT CANE THAT SHE HOLDS CONFIDENTLY IN ONE HAND.

GREEN-SKINNED AND MUCH TOO YOUNG TO BE A SHIP’S CAPTAIN IS VICTOR STANLEY (PLAYED BY ANOLE), WHO WATCHES THE PERFORMANCE WITH CURIOUS EYES. HIS CAPTAIN’S HAT IS TUCKED UNDER ONE ARM AS HE CUTS A PLEASING FIGURE IN HIS WHITE UNIFORM, THE EPAULETS AND TAILORED WAIST ACCENTUATING HIS CASUALLY SCULPTED BUILD.

BRIAN NICHOLS (PLAYED BY TAG), DRESSED IN BEIGE SUSPENDERS AND A STRAW BOATER HAT, KEEPS HIS FOCUS ON THE SILVER-SKINNED SINGER AS SHE PERFORMS. THOUGH HER VOCALS TUG ON THE HEARTSTRINGS OF SEVERAL GUESTS, HIS ATTENTION IS PURELY PRACTICAL AS HE GRADES EVERY NOTE, ALLOWING HIMSELF TO SMILE WHEN SHE FINISHES.

ROXY SINERO (PLAYED BY BLING!) SPORTS A SLEEVELESS BLACK FLAPPER DRESS THAT REACHES TO ABOUT HER KNEES. THE STEREOTYPICAL IMAGE IS SLIGHTLY RUINED BY THE AMETHYST SKIN, BUT SHE MAKES UP FOR IT BY CASTING A GRUMPY FROWN IN RANDOM DIRECTIONS. SHE’S NOT PARTICULARLY HAPPY TO BE HERE, BUT HERE SHE IS.

A CIGAR IS CLUTCHED BETWEEN THE INDEX AND MIDDLE FINGERS OF CLARICE LUCIANO (PLAYED BY BLINK)’S RIGHT HAND, AMIDST A SELECTION OF RINGS MADE OF SILVER, GOLD, AND DIAMOND. A FEDORA IS TUGGED DOWN OVER HER EYES, HER PERFECTLY TAILORED GREY PINSTRIPE SUIT HAVING BROADER SHOULDERS THAT ONE MIGHT EXPECT. HER HAIR IS CUT SHOULDERLENGTH FOR THE OCCASION AND A LILY TUCKED INTO THE LAPEL OF HER SUITCOAT, ALONG WITH A KILLER GLEAM IN HER EYES.

THE ALISTAIR SISTERS (PLAYED BY THE STEPFORD CUCKOOS) ARE WATCHING THE SHOW AND ALMOST SILENTLY MURMURING AMONGST THEMSELVES. WHAT? THEY’RE NOT JEALOUS. YOU ARE JEALOUS. OF THEM. BECAUSE THEY’RE GONNA BE STARS! DRESSED IN SLIGHTLY IDENTICAL EVENING WEAR, THEY SIT AT A TABLE NEAR THE STAGE, BIDING THEIR TIME LIKE LIONS CIRCLING THEIR PREY.

JOSHUA SILAS (PLAYED BY ELIXIR) IS CLAD IN A CRISP PINSTRIPED NAVY SUIT WITH PLEATED PANTS AND A SUIT JACKET WITH A CLEAN WHITE SHIRT BENEATH AND A CRIMSON VEST. HIS BLACK TIE IS UNDONE AND A WIDE-BRIMMED HAT MATCHES HIS SUIT AS HE WATCHES IN A SURLY FASHION.

MEGAN MATTHEWS (PLAYED BY PIXIE) DOESN’T TURN TO HER NOTEPAD ON HER TABLE, WHERE SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE A RECORD OF CESSILY’S PERFORMANCE. HER STYLED CLOCHE HAT IS ANGLED JAUNTILY, AND SHE WEARS A METICULOUSLY-CONSTRUCTED OUTFIT THAT EVOKES A MONASTIC ROBE. GOLD GREEK KEY WEAVES OVER HER BLACK SHEATH DRESS AS RAINBOWS PIROUETTE HER SHARP-LOOKING WINGS.

JULIAN BRICKMAN (PLAYED BY HELLION) IS HERE WITH A PURPOSE. PEOPLE BUY MONEY FROM HIM, PEOPLE GIVE HIM THE MONEY BACK. HIS INTERESTS ARE ON THE LINE TONIGHT AND HE WANTS HIS COMEUPPANCE. DRESSED IN A FINE BLACK TWO-PIECE SUIT ACCOMPANIED WITH A BLACK VEST AND EVEN A POCKET WATCH, HE SITS AT A TABLE IN THE CORNER, KEEPING HIS EYES ON ALL INTERESTED PLAYERS.

SOFIA LORDER (PLAYED BY WIND DANCER), THE MAYOR OF THIS LITTLE OPERATION THEY CALL A TOWN, IS DRESSED IN A WHITE UNISEX SUIT WITH THIN-TIPPED BOOTS, A FIGURE-HUGGING VEST, A LONG-TAILED SUIT, AND A WESTERN-STYLED TIE AS SHE LOOKS FIERCE AND DEFIANT. LORDERS HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO GO FANCY, SENDING THEIR CHILDREN OUT OF TOWN TO STUDY IN THE BIG CITY WHERE THEY LEARN AMONG THE BIG SHOTS, BUT SOFIA HAS RETURNED HOME EARLIER THAN EXPECTED WHEN HER FATHER PASSED AWAY, ALSO EARLIER THAN EXPECTED. SHE SURVEYS THE AREA WITH IN-CHARACTER COLDNESS THAT HIDES OUT-OF-CHARACTER GIDDINESS.

FINALLY, THE SHOW ENDS AND CESSILY SASHAYS BACKSTAGE WITH A HAND ON HER HIP. IMMEDIATELY, ROXY STANDS AND FOLLOWS HER, WITH TALIA MAKING HER WAY TOWARD THE EXIT, VICTOR GREETING PASSENGERS WHILE USING OVERLONG WORDS AND OCCASIONALLY SLIPPING INTO AN UNCONVINCING ENGLISH ACCENT, BRIAN MOVING TO MEET CESSILY BACKSTAGE BUT UNAWARE OF ROXY, THE ALISTAIR SISTERS STORMING OFF WITH MEGAN TRYING TO GET AN INTERVIEW FROM THEM, AND JOSH MEANDERING NONCHALANTLY TOWARD THE HALLWAY AND THE OUTSIDE DECK BEYOND WITH JULIAN FOLLOWING THE GRUFF BOOTLEGGER TO GET A WORD.

SOFIA TURNS TO DON CLARICE AND SAYS THAT SHE’S SURPRISED TO FIND HER ON THE UPPER DECKS AND NOT BETTING ON THE ONGOING BLOODSPORTS AT THE FURNACE. CLARICE SMIRKS, SAYING THAT BLOODSPORTS ARE ONE THING, BUT SHE WANTED TO HEAR HER GAL SING A LITTLE TUNE. SOFIA NODS BEFORE MOVING BACKSTAGE TO DO THE HANDSHAKES AND CONGRATULATIONS SORT OF THINGS THAT GOOD MAYORS DO.

MEANWHILE, CELESTE TURNS AS MEGAN ASKS HER IF THEY WERE THE ONES DOING THOSE JAWDROPPING VOCALS AT REHEARSALS EARLIER TODAY. SHE NODS, SAYING THAT THAT WAS DEFINITELY THEM AS THE OTHER SISTERS HEAD BACKSTAGE. MEANWHILE, TALIA TRIES TO STIFLE A LAUGH WHILE IN THE HALLWAY AS SHE REMEMBERS CLARICE’S CIGAR AND FEDORA. AT ANOTHER PART OF THE HALLWAY, JOSH TURNS TO FACE JULIAN AS VIC JOINS THE CONVERSATION, TELLING THE GOLD ENTREPRENEUR THAT HE DOESN’T WANT ANY TROUBLE ON HIS SHIP.

MEANWHILE, CESSILY IS SITTING IN FRONT OF HER MIRROR WHEN ROXY ENTERS. SHE TELLS THE CRYSTAL GIRL THAT SHE’S SURPRISED TO SEE HER BEFORE SAYING THAT SHE SHOULDN’T BE THERE. ROXY FOLDS HER ARMS ACROSS HER CHEST, ASKING IF SHE REALLY SHOULDN’T BE THERE OR IF CESSILY DOESN’T WANT HER THERE. SUDDENLY, BRIAN AND SOFIA ENTER AND CESSILY TELLS HER MANAGER TO ESCORT ROXY OUT BEFORE NOTICING SOFIA AND TELLING BRIAN TO FETCH HER A DRINK.

SUDDENLY, THE LIGHTS GO OUT. THOSE BACKSTAGE HEAR MOVEMENT, A SCUFFLE, AND SOMETHING HITTING THE GROUND AND SHATTERING. THERE’S A GASP, PLEADING AND PLAINTIVE, AND THEN A FLESHY THUMP AS CESSILY LETS GO OF SOFIA’S SHOULDER AND SOMETHING HITS THE FLOOR.

SUDDENLY, THE LIGHTS FLICKER ON AND SOFIA, ROXY, AND BRIAN STAND AROUND THE CORPSE OF CESSILY O’HALLAHAN! BLOOD POOLS ON THE CARPET AROUND THE KNIFE PUSHED INTO HER BACK. MINDEE AND PHOEBE GASP AS THEY ENTER AND THE LATTER SCREAMS THAT THERE’S BEEN A MURDER, AND ROXY LETS OUT HER BEST DAMSEL-Y SCREAM AS SHE DROPS TO HER KNEES AND ASKS WHY THE DEAD SINGER COULDN’T LOVE HER.

EMMY AWARD WINNING ACTRESS, ROXY IS NOT.

NEARBY FLOATS A BLUISH, SEMI-TRANSPARENT CESSILY KINCAID, WEARING THE SAME CLOTHES AS HER CHARACTER, BUT GHOOOOOOOOSTLY~!

SOFIA: SINERO! HOW COULD YOU?!

YES, SOFIA THROWS ROXY UNDER THE BUS. ROXY, MEANWHILE, ROXY SAYS THAT IF ANYONE DID THIS, IT WAS PROBABLY HER. BRIAN TELLS ROXY TO GET AWAY FROM THE BODY, AND ROXY YELLS AT HIM TOO, SAYING THAT HE DIDN’T CARE ABOUT CESSILY AND JUST WANTED TO MAKE MONEY OFF HER.

GHOST CESSILY: YES. YEEEEES. TURN UPON ONE ANOTHER…

IN THE HALLWAY, JULIAN AND JOSH GASP UPON HEARING THE SCREAMS OF MURDER. VIC TELLS THEM THAT HE KNOWS THEY WERE BOTH THERE WITH HIM, SO IT COULDN’T HAVE BEEN ONE OF THEM. SUDDENLY, TALIA APPEARS OUT OF SOFIA’S STATEROOM AND VIC TURNS TO HER, ASKING WHAT SHE WAS DOING IN THERE, AND ALLOWING JOSH AND JULIAN TO RUN BACKSTAGE. TALIA SAYS THAT SHE JUST GOT A BIT TURNED AROUND AND TELLS VIC THAT SHE’S GOING OVER TO HER ROOM NOW. SHE THEN HEADS OFF INTO ANOTHER ROOM THAT VIC SAYS ALSO ISN’T HERS.

VIC STARTS TO WALK OVER IN TALIA’S DIRECTION AS SHE SLIPS INTO JOSH’S ROOM, BUT HE PAUSES BRIEFLY, GLANCING UP AND DOWN THE HALLWAY. VIC THEN LEAVES JOSH’S DOOR AND JOGS OVER TO CESSILY’S ROOM, OPENING IT WITH THE MASTER KEY AND RUSHING INSIDE. CLARICE FOLLOWS HIM, SAYING THAT SHE THINKS THEY BOTH HAVE THE SAME THOUGHT HERE.

BACKSTAGE, JOSH, JULIAN, CELESTE, AND MEGAN JOIN THE GROUP BACKSTAGE. JULIAN SHAKES HIS HEAD IN PITY WHILE SOFIA TELLS ROXY THAT THEY ALL KNOW CESSILY LEFT HER AT THE ALTAR. WHILE ROXY WAILS TO THE MAYOR OF MURDERVILLE THAT SHE DIDN’T KNOW WHAT THEY HAD, SOFIA MOVES OVER TO ONE OF THE MIRRORS AND PULLS CURIOUSLY, REVEALING A SECRET DOOR BEHIND IT. JULIAN WASTES NO TIME GOING DOWN THERE, REQUESTING A WORD WITH BRIAN IN THE FUTURE.

ROXY: NO WAY AM I GOING DOWN THERE TO GET STABBED LIKE POOR CESSILY, THE LOVE OF MY LIFE! SOMEONE NEEDS TO MOVE HER SOMEWHERE PRIVATE! WE CAN’T JUST LEAVE HER LIKE THIS!

STEPFORDS: WE CAN’T MOVE THE BODY! WE SHOULD… YOU KNOW… INVESTIGATE! SURELY THERE ARE CLUES UPON HER PERSON!

WITH THAT, CELESTE TELLS PHOEBE TO EITHER GET FINGER PRINT DUST OR GATHER UP EVERYONE ELSE. PHOEBE NODS AND STYLISHLY STALKS OFF WHILE SOFIA TELLS ROXY TO STAY CRYING OVER HER BELOVED OR COME DOWN AND AVENGE HER. SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE WILL DO AND DECIDES TO FIND THE CULPRIT, FOLLOWING JULIAN DOWN THE SECRET PASSAGE. ROXY GLARES AT HER, ASKING WHAT GOOD AVENGING WILL DO IF CESSILY’S DEAD.

BRIAN: YOU THINK YOU’RE SPECIAL BECAUSE YOU HAD A THING WITH CESSILY?! JOIN THE CLUB! SHE’S SCREWED HALF THE SHIP! I STUCK BY HER THROUGH IT ALL! SHE WAS MY GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT!

ROXY: CESSILY AND I HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL!

ROXY THEN LEAVES THE BACKSTAGE IN TEARS (SHE’S NOT ACTUALLY CRYING), WHILE BRIAN, JOSH, MEGAN, CELESTE, AND MINDEE BICKER AMONGST THEMSELVES.

AT CESSILY’S STATEROOM, VICTOR HUNCHES OVER THE RECENTLY DECEASED DIVA’S DESK. JUST AS HE NOTICES SOME KIND OF CONTRACT, HE LOOKS OVER AT CLARICE, SAYING THAT HE SUPPOSES THEY MIGHT HAVE THOUGHT ALONG SIMILAR AVENUES. (HE TRIES TO PRONOUNCE ‘AVENUES’ IN A SORT OF FRENCH ACCENT AND FAILS HORRIBLY) AND LOOKS BACK AT THE PAPER, SAYING THAT CESSILY SEEMS TO HAVE INTENDED TO CUT HER MANAGER OUT OF THE CONSIDERABLE PROFITS FROM HER REMARKABLE TALENT.

MEANWHILE, ALONG THE SECRET PASSAGEWAY, JULIAN NOTICES A SHIMMERING SOMETHING. HE LOOKS CLOSER AND SEES THAT IT’S A NECKLACE. HE THEN REACHES THE END OF THE PASSAGE AND PUSHES OPEN THE DOOR AT THE OTHER END, COMING INTO CESSILY’S STATEROOM WHERE DON CLARICE AND CAPTAIN VICTOR HAPPEN TO BE. CLARICE WONDERS WHAT HE’S DOING THERE AS SOFIA STEPS IN BEHIND HIM.

SUDDENLY, THE LIGHTS GO OUT. TALIA CAN BE SEEN STROLLING OUT OF JULIAN’S ROOM BEFORE THEY DO, BRIAN SUDDENLY MUTTERS THAT HE HAS TO GET OUT OF THERE, AND ROXY GIVES HER BEST HORROR MOVIE SCREAM BEFORE FLEEING TO THE DECK OF THE SHIP.

WHEN THE LIGHTS COME BACK ON, MEGAN MATTHEWS, ACE REPORTER, IS CLUTCHING HER THROAT ON THE GROUND, RED RUNNING BETWEEN HER FINGERS AS SHE STRUGGLES AND GASPS FOR AIR. BRIAN’S HAT LIES NEXT TO HER BESIDE THE KNIFE USED TO STAB CESSILY.

THE MURDERER HAS STRUCK AGAIN.

GHOST-CESSILY SCREAMS IN HER BEST ‘NOOOOO, JENNA!’ VOICE AS A TRANSLUCENT PIXIE ‘GHOST’ RISES FROM THE DEAD BODY. SHE WRAPS HER ARMS AROUND MEGAN IN A BIG HUG AND SQUEEZES HER EYES SHUT WITH A GRIN.

GHOST-CESSILY: OH, OUR POOR MEGAN MATTHEWS! SHE WAS ONTO THE HOTTEST SCOOP OF HER LIFE! WOE! WOOOOOE!

MEANWHILE, TALIA HEADS OVER TO THE CREW’S QUARTERS, MAKING HER WAY OVER TO THE ONE THAT READS CAPTAIN VICTOR STANLEY’S QUARTERS. AFTER COMMENTING THAT THAT’S A STUPID ASS NAME, SHE OPENS THE DOOR AND HEADS ON IN.

BACKSTAGE, JOSH DEMANDS EVERYONE (BASICALLY JUST THE CUCKOOS) SHOW THEIR HANDS AND THE SISTERS STARE AT HIM. CELESTE ASSUMES THAT THE KILLER WAS PROBABLY ONE OF THE PEOPLE WHO RAN OFF AND SAYS THAT FROM WHAT THEY’VE HEARD, CESSILY WAS GETTING AROUND LIKE SOME SORT OF TAWDRY BICYCLE. GHOST CESSILY GETS OUT A NOTEPAD, WRITING ‘DON’T FORGET THE BLOOD SPLATTER!’ WITH A FEATHER PEN.

MEANWHILE, TALIA LEAVES VICTOR’S QUARTERS WITH A TAP OF HER CANE. SHE WALKS OUT AND SEES PHOEBE HEADING BACK TO JOIN HER SISTERS FROM HER ERRAND, HOLDING A MAKEUP KIT AS THE ONLY THING SHE CAN FIND FOR FINGER-PRINT DUST.

IN THE STATEROOM, JULIAN NOTICES BRIAN IN THE HALLWAY AND SAYS THAT THEY NEED TO HAVE A WORD WHILE CLARICE NOTICES SOME PAPERS ON THE DESK AND SMIRKS, SAYING THAT IT SEEMS LIKE THEIR CAPTAIN HAS A CRUSH. SHE THEN SHOWS A SERIES OF LETTERS ADDRESSED TO CESSILY BY VICTOR AND ASKS HIM IF HE DIDN’T WANT ANYONE TO SEE THEM BECAUSE HE TOLD HER HE’D KILL EVERYONE ON THE SHIP FOR HER. SOFIA ‘OHS’ SLIGHTLY AS VIC LOOKS AT THE LETTER IN HIS HAND AND LOSES IT, HIS FACE GOING DARK GREEN.

HE THRUSTS THE LETTER AT CLARICE AND SAYS THAT THERE’S NOTHING ABOUT MURDERS. HE DOESN’T KNOW THAT FOR SURE AND HE’S SURE AS HELL NOT GONNA CHECK. SUDDENLY, TALIA LEANS IN AND SAYS THAT VIC WAS KISSING CESSILY BEFORE THE SHOW BEFORE HEADING BACK OUT INTO THE HALLWAY. VIC DEMANDS TO KNOW WHO SHE IS WHILE GHOST CESSILY BURSTS OUT LAUGHING, SENDING A TELEPATHIC SIGNAL TO VIC THROUGH THEIR PSYCHIC LINK SET UP BY THE CUCKOOS, SAYING THAT SHE DIDN’T KNOW VIC WOULD BE THE CAPTAIN.

SOFIA ARCHES HER BROW, COMMENTING ON THE TITILLATING SITUATION.

MEANWHILE, ON THE DECK OF THE USS O’HALLAHAN, ROXY LOOKS UP AT THE MOON, IGNORING THE SHOUTS AND CALLS FROM WITHIN THE SHIP.

ROXY: THE MOON SPLIT IN HALF AND STARS CRUMBLED. FALLING LIKE FIREWORKS INTO THE SEA. I WATCHED THE WORLD FALL APART, ON THE DAY THAT MY LOVE LEFT ME.

TALIA STOPS SHORT ON HER WAY UP TO THE DECK TO HEAR ROXY’S MONOLOGUE AS THE BLACK-CLAD CRYSTAL GIRL CLIMBS OVER THE RAILING OF THE DECK, YELLING TO THE STARRY SKY THAT SHE AND CESSILY WILL BE TOGETHER SOON.

THEN, SHE JUMPS OVERBOARD, INTO THE LAKE, NEVER TO BE HEARD FROM AGAIN.

TALIA WATCHES THE SITUATION BRIEFLY BEFORE GIVING A SHRUG AND HEADING RIGHT BACK DOWN THE HALLWAY TOWARD ROXY’S ROOM, ON HER OWN AGENDA.

IN THE STATEROOM, VIC ASKS SOFIA TO READ THE LETTERS AND TELL THEM OF THE APPARENT SCANDAL BEFORE INTERNALLY GRUNTING A BIT WHILE GHOST-CESSILY TELLS HIM THAT SHE GOT THOSE PASSAGES FROM THE FINEST OF ROMANTIC LITEROTICA. CLARICE JABS A FINGER AT VICTOR, ACCUSING HIM OF MAKING THE MOVES ON HER DAME BEFORE SAYING THAT SHE DOESN’T THINK ANYONE IS KILLING FOR LOVE HERE.

CLARICE: MOST PEOPLE KILL FOR MONEY. AND THE PERSON WHO STANDS TO MAKE THE MOST MONEY OUT OF ALL THIS? MY DAME’S MANAGER!

CESSILY CHUCKLES BEFORE TURNING OVER TO THE DRIPPING WET ‘GHOST’ OF ROXY. SHE LAUGHS AND HUGS HER GIRLFRIEND, SAYING THAT SHE’S TOO MUCH WHILE ROXY SAYS THAT IT’S ALL PART OF THE ACTING PROCESS. YOU HAVE TO BE DRAMATIC TO MAKE IT MORE INTENSE.

MEANWHILE, JOSH WALKS OUT OF THE BACKSTAGE ROOM TO FIND CLUES WHILE PHOEBE CHASES HIM, SAYING THAT HE CAN’T ABANDON THREE ELIGIBLE BACHELORETTES TO A MURDER. CELESTE HEADS TOWARDS THE STATEROOM WHILE MINDEE RUNS OFF DOWN THE HALL IN VAGUELY THE LAST DIRECTION SHE SAW ROXY GOING.

IN THE STATEROOM, AS SOFIA CONDUCTS HER OWN INVESTIGATION, VICTOR SHAKES HIS FIST AT CLARICE, SAYING THAT SHE ALWAYS TOOK CESSILY FOR GRANTED. CLARICE GLARES AT HIM, SAYING THAT CESSILY CHOSE WHO SHE WANTED IN THE END AND IT WASN’T HIM BEFORE VIC EXPLODES IN FAKE MELODRAMA, SAYING THAT CLARICE ONLY WISHES THAT SHE COULD HAVE LOVED HER LIKE HE DID AND NOW SHE’S LOST HER CHANCE. AS THEY ARGUE, BRIAN AND JULIAN WONDER WHO THE HELL TALIA’S SUPPOSED TO BE AND WHY SHE KEEPS GOING IN PEOPLE’S ROOMS. JOSH HEADS TOWARD THE HALLWAY WHILE THE STEPFORDS TRY TO GATHER EVERYONE.

GUESS WHAT?!

THE LIGHTS GO OUT.

A LOUD BANG COMES FROM THE STATEROOM FOLLOWED BY A THUMP. WHEN THEY COME BACK ON, DON CLARICE LUCIANO CLUTCHES HER CHEST, A REVOLVER LYING ON THE FLOOR. SHE WAS SHOT WITH HER OWN GUN! AND CELESTE IS STANDING IN THE DOORWAY, HAVING HEARD EVERYTHING VIC SAID.

GHOST CESSILY: J’ACCUSE! WHO COULD HAVE DONE THIS?!

AS GHOST CLARICE ENTERS, ROXY GIVES HER A SHOVE FOR STEALING HER GIRLFRIEND. ROXY LAUGHS AND ASKS IF THERE’S GHOST POPCORN AS MEGAN HIGH-FIVES HER. BEING IN THE ASTRAL PLANE (IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY GUESSED), CESSILY CREATES A JUMBO TUB OF EXTRA BUTTERY POPCORN AND HANDS IT TO CLARICE.

IN ROXY’S ROOM, TJ ASKS CESSILY IF SHE WINS AT SOME POINT. SHE SAYS THAT SHE FEELS LIKE PERSONAL GOALS ARE BEING MET HERE AND SHE FEELS LIKE IT’S TIME TO HOP ON HER JET SKI AND RIDE INTO THE SUNSET. CESSILY TELLS HER TO JUST JOIN THE SHENANIGANS, REMINDING HER THAT THEY DIDN’T REALLY HAVE ANY JET SKIS IN THE 1920’S, BUT SHE COULD PROBABLY STEAL A LIFE BOAT.

MEANWHILE, JOSH AND PHOEBE JOIN CELESTE, VIEWING CLARICE’S BODY. SOFIA BENDS DOWN BESIDE HER ‘DEAD’ GIRLFRIEND AND COMMENTS THAT SHE WILL MISS HER STUPID ACCENT. SHE CLOSES THE MAFIA DON’S EYES BEFORE GRABBING HER RIFLE AND POINTING IT AT VICTOR, TRYING TO ACT PARANOID.

SOFIA: THAT IS ENOUGH! I WILL NOT BE GOING DOWN WITH THIS PROVERBIAL SHIP! WHOEVER DID THIS BETTER COME OUT RIGHT NOW AND WE CAN DISCUSS TERMS, OR I WILL START SHOOTING! *TELEPATHICALLY* CESSILY, IS THIS WHAT YOU WASTE YOUR TIME ON WHILE YOU’RE ON THE INTERNET?

JULIAN AND BRIAN WALK IN ON SOFIA BRANDISHING A GUN AS MINDEE AND TJ JOIN THE GROUP. THE TRIPLETS HOLD THEIR HANDS UP AND PHOEBE ASKS HOW MANY BULLETS THE GUN HAS. SHE DEDUCES THAT WHOEVER DID THIS HAS A SECRET TO HIDE ABOUT CESSILY AND THEY MURDERED MEGAN BECAUSE SHE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO COULD FIGURE IT OUT. MINDEE THEN ACCUSES BRIAN OF KILLING CLARICE SINCE SHE WAS THE ONE WHO FIGURED OUT THAT HE WAS THE KILLER.

TJ: EH, IT’S PROBABLY THE BOOTLEGGER OR THE LOANSHARK. BOTH OF ‘EM. I DUNNO. I’VE BEEN BUSY.

JULIAN: ME? THE MAYOR IS THE ONE WITH THE GUN!

BRIAN QUICKLY TRIES TO DEFEND HIMSELF AGAINST THE TRIO’S CLAIM BUT JULIAN AND JOSH BOTH AGREE WITH THEM, SAYING THAT CESSILY INTENDED TO FIRE HIM. IT’S POSSIBLE THAT HE COULDN’T HANDLE IT AND DECIDED TO KILL HER TO EARN PROFIT FROM HER DEATH. IN THE BACKGROUND, VIC TRIES TO GRAB THE GUN FROM SOFIA AND GETS HIS HAND BITTEN IN THE PROCESS. AND OF COURSE, THE CASPER CREW IS JUST EATING THIS UP, WATCHING AND EATING THEIR GHOST POPCORN.

IN THE END, THEY REACH A LOGJAM. THEY CAN’T DECIDE WHO DID IT, BUT EVENTUALLY DECIDE THAT BRIAN, THE MANAGER, HAS A VERY CLEAR MOTIVE, AND PROOF OF SUCH. PLUS, HE WAS PRESENT OR NEARBY FOR EVERY MURDER. NOT TO MENTION POOR MEGAN WAS HOLDING HIS HAT AS SHE DIED.

WHEN THE POLICE ARRIVE THE NEXT MORNING, IT’S A TENSE STANDOFF OF GUESTS BRANDISHING KNIVES, CANDLESTICKS, AND AT LEAST ONE GUN AT EACH OTHER. BRIAN IS CARTED OFF INTO CUSTODY WHILE VIC IS TREATED FOR HIS SOFIA-INFLICTED “BITE WOUNDS”.

ROXANNE SINERO’S BODY WAS NEVER FOUND…

AND THE KILLER… WALKED FREE.

WE THEN ROLL FAKE CREDITS THAT SHOW THAT THE SCRIPT WAS WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY CESSILY AND THE SETTING WAS PROVIDED BY THE CUCKOOS THANKS TO THE ASTRAL PLANE. THEY ALSO SET UP A PSYCHIC LINK SO THE GUESTS COULD GIVE CESSILY THEIR FEEDBACK. WE THEN CUT OVER TO THE END CREDITS SCENE.

SAW-ESQUE FLASHBACKS SHOW THE STEPFORDS IMMEDIATELY STORMING OFF TO THE HALLWAY AND CESSILY’S STATEROOM. CELESTE WAS STOPPED BY MEGAN LEAVING MINDEE TO HEAD TO THE ELECTRICAL ROOM TO TURN OUT THE LIGHTS WHILE PHOEBE SNUCK IN AND MURDERED CESSILY O’HALLAHAN THROUGH THE SECRET PASSAGE THEY LEARNED ABOUT FROM CELESTE’S AFFAIR WITH CAPTAIN VICTOR.

THE GIRLS THEN RUSHED BACK TO THE SCENE OF THE CRIME FROM THE HALLWAY WITH MEGAN, WHO WAS NONE THE WISER. IT WAS THEN THAT THEY SENT PHOEBE OFF TO ‘GATHER FINGER-PRINT DUST’, ONLY FOR HER TO ONCE AGAIN SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS SO CELESTE COULD SLIT MEGAN’S THROAT AND MINDEE COULD PLANT BRIAN’S HAT ON HER, SINCE THEY’D DISCOVERED THAT IT WASN’T CESSILY THAT SUNK THEIR BUDDING CAREERS, BUT HER MANAGER, AND THEY KILLED THE WRONG PERSON! TO GET THEIR REVENGE, THEY PLANNED TO FRAME BRIAN.

ROXY OFFED HERSELF, LIKE A TOTAL BASKET CASE.

THEIR THIRD AND FINAL VICTIM WAS CLARICE. ONCE AGAIN, THEY SPLIT UP, PHOEBE HEADING OUT TO SHUT OFF THE LIGHTS AGAIN WHILE MINDEE SHOT THE DON, WHO WAS LOUDLY HEARD ACCUSING BRIAN JUST BEFORE HER DEATH! ONCE AGAIN, THEY ATTEMPTED TO FRAME BRIAN FOR THEIR CRIMES…

…AND IT WORKED.

WE THEN CUT OVER TO CESSILY’S ROOM AS CESSILY ASKS THE GROUP WHAT THEY THINK. THEY IMMEDIATELY GIVE OFF VARIOUS SOUNDS OF APPROVAL AS CESSILY TURNS BACK TO HER LAPTOP AND ADDS THE FINISHING TOUCH;

MURDER ON LAKE MICHIGAN

BY CESSILY KINCAID AND THE XAVIER SCHOOL THEATER DEPARTMENT.

A XAVIER’S SCHOOL PRODUCTION

~FIN~

#new x men #cessily kincaid #sofia mantega #clarice ferguson #megan gwynn #julian keller #josh foley #talia wagner #victor borkowski #brian cruz #murder mystery

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