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juleshq · 4 years

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* 𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐠𝐨𝐬 here and do i have the tea for you . 𝐉𝐔𝐋𝐄𝐒 is back in bridgehampton for the summer , living off the 𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐎 family 𝟐.𝟑 𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐨𝐧 net worth . must be nice to come back home to the hamptons , i wonder what her fellow class of 2017 grads think of her return . you know , she was known around town as the 𝐂𝐎𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 and for bhs senior superlatives pronouns was crowned as 𝐌𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐋𝐘 𝐓𝐎 𝐄𝐋𝐎𝐏𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐕𝐄𝐆𝐀𝐒 & 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐃 . i wonder if that still holds true today , a lot can change when you go off to 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐘 and study 𝐁𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐘 . either way , i bet she is still very 𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐄 , 𝐃𝐄𝐕𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐃 , 𝐃𝐄𝐂𝐄𝐈𝐓𝐅𝐔𝐋 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐒𝐔𝐁𝐉𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐄 . hopefully this time next year the plans to 𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐌𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐋 come true . in the meantime , i look forward to seeing her blast 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫 (𝐁𝐔𝐓 𝐈 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃 𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐄) 𝖇𝖞 𝐤𝐚𝐥𝐢 𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐬 at every hamptons function . it’s going to be a wild summer home , welcome back .

i don’t think i’ve EVER been this excited to plot and interact with a group of people , u all seem like such beaut ppl & i’m in love already but i’m a little . . . intimidated ADFJH . anyways , i’m not going to ramble bc i’m ready to get down to business , i’m sammie & i go by she / her pronouns ! under the cut is a long bio on jules ! i will GLADLY give you a synopsis on this chaotic mess pls just ask , HERE is her pinterest board please ignore the sudden amount of pins of just her , also i’m down to plot here or on discord , my discord is @ᵘ ᵍᵒᵗ ᵃ ᵈᵒˡˡᵃʳ ?#3246

* / BASICS

full name: juliana kaia dicaprio

nicknames: jules , julie / juli

age & dob: twenty-one , august 14th , 1998

place of birth: long island , new york .

sexuality: heterosexual ( that she knows off )

bender: cisfemale

* / MORE BASIC INFO

languages: english, french, some spanish.

religion: catholic

education: high school , majoring in biology at stanford

occupation: unemployed

drinks, smokes, & drugs: all of the above

* / PERSONALITY

zodiac sign: leo

likes: dark chocolate , tea in the morning , white roses , instigating bad situations , wine , black coffee , the smell of freshly brewed coffee , talking with strangers , long travels , adventures , being called “ angel ” , popcorn , quick tex responders , products made with silk , athletes , crime shows / films , crowded rooms , glitter .

dislikes: fake designer bags , people who don’t know how to lie , f , people who wear pearls regularly , long text messages , voicemails , men who are cheap , people who chew with their mouth open , humming , thrift shops , water-poof mascara , the smell of grass , extensive planning , and arrogance & stupidity combined .

bad habits: breaking promises to herself & others , not thinking before doing , fixating with her hair when nervous .

secret talent: juggling

fears: aging terribly , being widowed , drowning , being buried alive .

positive traits: alluring , convincing , affectionate , ambitious / devoted , systematic .

negative traits: manipulative , conniving , deceitful , dishonest , subjective .

* / APPEARANCE

tattoos: dagger on right index finger , “ devil ” on left index finger .

piercings: three in each ear , cartilage .

* / FAMILY INFO.

parent names: claire boucher & david dicaprio .

parent relationship: divorced .

sibling names: annalise , ashton , keller , & wade .

sibling relationship: step siblings & half .

children: none .

pets: 2 family dogs on her moms side.

* / BIOGRAPHY

i’m sorry it got long

𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐘𝐋𝐄𝐑’s entire childhood was spent in the spotlight -- her father was a huge rockstar in the 70's & 80's, and her mother a model . Claire spent her childhood between Florida , California , and New York , attending red carpets , premieres , etc. Claire attended Stanford to obtain a bachelor in science but was in and out of modeling in her teens and early twenties .

𝐃𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐃 𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐎 lived an affluent life more under the radar . His grandfather is CEO of JD banking , one of the four largest banks in the world . He attended Princeton as the rest of his family did . He got involved in the company business at a very young age as did his brothers , but went on to become the new CEO after his fathers unfortunate passing in 2002 .

𝐉𝐔𝐋𝐄𝐒 was and will forever be her parents pride & joy . her parents were high school sweethearts & got married young -- at a twenty-two / twenty-three . they had been trying for two years to start their own family but jules’ mother struggled . thanksgiving in the hamptons , a dicaprio family tradition the day is engraved in her mothers memory , in 1997 , they announced to their family that after years of trying , they were pregnant .

𝐉𝐔𝐋𝐄𝐒 grew up completely pampered ; bi-weekly trips to the nail salon with her mother and annual father-daughter trips . her mother was her best friend until she began morphing jules into what she thought was perfect . making sure she spoke at least one other language , was active in school , extracurriculars , how she presented herself . her mother cared about image due to her own childhood of growing up in the spotlight . besides the near brainwash to fit her mother’s image of perfect , everything was ideal & ‘ normal ’ up until the summer before her freshman year of high school . her mother discovered the affair her father had been having for months with a woman he did business with . he claimed it was due to the fact that jules’ mother had returned to some normalcy and wanted to work again , modeling and doing some traveling , therefore he ‘ just missed her around ’ . jules was aware of everything going on , heard the countless nights they spent arguing in the opposite wing of the house , she picked up on her father being late to family dinner because “ he had work to do ” . her parents tried their best to keep her in the dark for the sake of her sanity , innocence , and view on her father . jules went along with it all , the daddy’s girl in her was in denial for all of the months leading up to their divorce . at the end , her mother got full custody of her .

𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐕𝐎𝐑𝐂𝐄 came two “ yes ” parents . everything became a competition between the two , trying to one up the other ; who took jules on the better summer vacation , had the most over the top christmas morning , etc . it was insanely manipulative & jules there wasn’t a time period where jules felt more alone ; not having a sibling to relate to , she was embarassed to tell her peers the real reason why her parents split , it was so cliché . both parents didn’t take too long to remarry , her father found another stay-at-home wife and her mother lucked out with a lawyer ten years older than she . her step-father had two daughtes & son with whom jules hated in the beginning – it was a lot to take in and she was used to being the only child . her father went on to have a child with his new wife two years after their marriage . it was all an immense amount of change within seven years .

𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 for jules had been constantly changing since the news of her father’s affair , she’d spend her summers & holiday’s going back & forth between each parents in the hamptons until her father moved to calabasas to be closer to his wife’s family as soon as the baby was born . jules had always been a wild , reckless child at heart and the divorce between her parents only allowed her to push her limits even more . the two-three years her parents spent processing their divorce were her golden years -- she could not get in trouble with her parents and they never got upset with her . she took advantage of it all and abused drinking , hanging out with boys , you name it . she loved the attention she received from any male figure -- it made up for the lack of attention she was getting from her father once he got the boot .

𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐄 was where jules found her safe space ; she could be her wild self , far away from home and only a five hour drive from her father that she still rarely sees . she joined a sorority , joined the exec board , was forced to join french club by her mother , all while maintaining a 4.08 gpa .

* ` 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐖𝐈𝐒𝐄 jules has always been a wild child . she’s always had a desire for attention , all eyes & attention on her , though the B I R T H of her uncontrollable desire for attention from males stemmed after her parents divorce . the lack of attention from her father allowed her to realize her dad wasn’t the only one who could spoil her & every man was basically the same . she’s not super close with either of her dads at the moment and sees her father about three times a year , two of which are holidays & every now and then the spontaneous visit from him in cali .

𝐉𝐔𝐋𝐄𝐒 is a h u g e cry baby in the sense that she hates not getting what she wants . its not on purpose most of the time , it’s the way she was raised and the nature of her parents . she’s never had to ask for anything twice & hates doing so . though she’s a huge cry baby , she will try her best to mask her actual tears . she does a good job of seeming innocent , she’s that one friend that is super sus & lies a lot & keeps secrets but somehow is so good at convincing people other wise ? she’s a huge flirt , even when she’s not doing it on purpose , it’s sort of a weird practice or habit she’s grown into ? she feels empowered in the weirdest way of owning men and being able to form their opinion of her for them , this stems from her newly founded daddy issues it’s more so due to the fact that her relationship with her father began to diminish once he moved out . she is & has been on her “ fuck love ” rampage .

𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋 do whatever she wants and will hide her bad intentions . she lives for chaos , loves enjoys pushing limits & boundaries . she loves a game of cat & mouse / teasing just knowing she has someone in her grip is what helps her sleep at night . she is a bit crazy . . . the type to watch someone’s snap score go up . def that type to block and unblock someone 238473 timES . she has an underlying need of approval from others and she almost needs to be liked by everyone she meets .

𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 she wants to model & be a playboy bunny BUT her dad would literally disown her if she didn’t follow her family legacy and attend stanford or yale to use her brains for good . she’s in school to be a pediatrician because at the end of the day she loves children and always wanted to seek a job in the healthcare field . she has plans to attend yale’s medical school after her senior year is complete at stanford .

i really based her off of american beauty & angela in the movie ( if you’ve seen it omg ily ) g

#╰ * ✴ 𝙢𝙪𝙣 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙨 ↝ 𝒇𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓 › ooc #entitled:intro #hi hI HI!!!!!!#xD

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icharchivist · 5 years

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Thinking of siblings t/rauma (and considering i no longer have th/erapies to talk about it so gotta find a way to put it into words since it seriously makes me spiral down everytime someone talk about “real siblings dynamic”) I see them enough to try to see why it makes me that uncomfortable.

For the longest time i thought about it being the abandon issues; And i think it’s partially true.

My eldest sister ran away from home when I was 7, I barely have any memories of her, which is extremely frustrating because i know she was the person i was the closest to back then. My mom was always neglectful, my father was never here and always so.... him, hateable, and my other sister was jealous of me and always shut me down. (we have family videos that show it a lot, like my parents trying to capture me in video when i was a kid and my sister barging in and trying to take all the focus, this sort of things). My sister also told me later that one thing that killed her was that i was this close to our eldest, in a way she wasn’t, and she took it against me.

I have no memory of the person i was the closest to before I turned 7. She left around my 7th birthday and in between two times my mom was in the hospital bc of a cancer.

And it left... such a sour ambiance at home. My mother was already neglectful but from that point on, rightfully so though, she ended up in a major depression. My dad was an asshole and was mocking it all the time, probably not helping that he’s probably the reason she left to start with. And my sister felt so betrayed she pushed away everyone. It alligned with when i started to get bullied at school. And worse of all, I was 7, so no one took the time to tell me what’s going on. I originally thought she left for my grandmother’s house for months, when they told me my sister did a judicial procedure to be officially under my grandma’s care with a restrincting order on my parents I’ve heard it ways later bc my mom was crying that my sister was trying to put them in prison, without giving me any context. And then without warning, the trials ended, and my sister left the country with my grandmother never to be seen again- and it took them months to tell me that.

It’s the usual isn’t it with this family. They do horrible things that have horrible consequences but they never say anything about it and you have to deal with it. Shame i had to do it when I was 7.

Unhelpful either too is that i inherited my sister’s room when she left. I was surrounded by all of hers without even seeing her again. And I barely even remember why we were closer. I just know the few memories I have of her were loving and close, and I know my sister told me about it more, that I was copying my eldest all the time and it made her so happy and i have no memory of that.

The next year I think, my other sister got deadly sick and had to be hospitalized. My mom freaked out, not wanting to lose another daughter this soon, and stayed by her side all the time. During the 3 months she was at the hospital i was left alone with my dad who was, and still is, an asshole, who would drop me off at a mom’s friend’s house bc it was a bother taking care of me, and again i was having problems at school and I was barely told what was going on.

My sister told me that she believes she got sick because in a way, she felt my mom’s neglect this way. She feels like her body responded to all that tr/auma. The result though is that my sister ended up with a fragile health and my mom kept overprotecting her, being here all the time for her. But never for me. Who cares anyway.

The thing is that, we both lived my eldest sister’s departure badly, both my sister and I. And we were fighting all the time. Like “real siblings do” according to online popularity. We were seriously always fighting and bickering and it was vile. My sister was never nice to me, always shutting me out, always venomous, hating when i was trying to be around her, hating if i was even around when her friends were over. But there was nothing fun in all of that. Even playing together was always vile, with my sister constantly making me regret it. There is nothing from that time period I look foundly at. Because I had a loving sister before I guess, because we both had. And we were both lost, both abandonned, both with different memories to hold on to, and my sister coped by clinging to her friends and rejecting me, and i did while people were rejecting me everywhere by trying to cling to my sister and being constantly pushed away.

And I was all the more frustrated that my mom was covering her with attention but barely looked in my direction at all time. A thing i’ve felt back then and had to talk to to my family as i grew up and they all ended up agreeing that it totally happened. I used to hear “you just believe that because you’re the youngest and isn’t used to not having the attention on you” but nowadays if you ask either my sister or my mom they know it’s true.

A couple of years after my eldest sister left, my other sister managed to contact her again. They talked for a few weeks, and my sister didn’t tell me before a few weeks, where she told me we should never tell mom because our eldest still resented her. When I asked if i could talk to her, my sister told me not yet, that she was trying to arrange it but that for now our Eldest needed time to think about messaging me back.

All was ruined bc my mom discovered it and took my sister’s mail account to beg my eldest to come back. We have never known what exactly went on in that, except that my eldest blocked my sister and sent a letter back home, saying she never wanted to have anything to do with any of us ever again. We have never heard of her personally after that. A missed chance.

When I was around 13, my parents divorced.It was vile, it still is, it was a disaster, my father ruined my mom’s life to a poitn she had no future staying there anymore. And because she recontacted a childhood sweetheart she fell in love with again back then, she decided to move away on the Reunion Island.

My sister and I had a choice. To stay with my father, or to leave with my mom.

I was bullied badly at school and was never close to my father. I took the chance as a fresh new start. My sister though had a good life, good friends, she was one year away from finishing high school, she had a boyfriend, a stable life. She refused to leave and stayed with my father.

The last few months before we left were the weirdest. It’s when my sister started to open up to me a little more. We were doing more sibling things like watching TV shows until late in her room, discussing together, sneaking up food. I think it was when we realized that we weren’t going to see each other again for a while. It was a weird time.

When we finally left with my mom, my sister ceased all contact with us. Mainly, because she felt abandonned; Because she wished we wouldn’t have left. Because she had been abandonned before and we wer eputting her through that again. So on my side, i also felt abandonned. Even if our relationship was weird with my sister, we were there. It was different than to have your sister ignoring your mails. Not after havign dealt with the total absence of the eldest one.

It lasted about a year. In that year, I came to visit for the summer holidays and my sister came to visit for the winter holidays. In between them, we barely talked. Aside from those two times, we never talked.

My uncle is a musician- in summer, we celebrated my sister’s birthday, and my uncle insisted that i sing a song for my sister when I was there. I picked a song half in french half in english, a duet. The english part resents the french part for having left, for not trying to make the relationship work, while the french parts talks about “if it’s too late to come back, i would come back in time and of all that i’m made of, i would give it back to you, even if we have to learn it all again/I wish i would have given you all about myself, instead of leaving, make everything anew between us again, instead of lying talking about our differences- loving you in another way than backward.” I still cry when i hear this song. So does my sister. She came running into my arms crying that day telling me how unfair it was to make your sister cry on her birthday.

Things got worse for my sister when we were away. my father kicked her out of the house as soon as she turned 18. She had a hard time adjusting to her new life, and she took mom being away even harder.

On my side, i was still bullied at school, had to deal with the step family, ahd to deal with my father being an asshole, and had my mom collapse on me completely because she “lost two daughters” as my sister didn’t talk to her anymore. I had to deal with my mom’s depression all that time. and mine that started to settle in. It was a bad time.

For a time, my mom managed to contact back her mother. It was a weird time. They echanged mails a few time. My grandmother as diagnosticked with a cancert so she wanted to contact back the daughter she had lost in all of that. But, as i mentioned before- my eldest sister left to live with my grandmother. My mom cherished this newfound bound with her mom to try to discover what became of my eldest sister. My grandma always shut her down though.

My mom got another divorce (which she subtlely blamed on me for mentioning i wanted to come back in France for my highschool) and..... She asked my grandmother if they could go live where they lived, on another island. It would have made us in contact with the Eldest again. My mom wanted my sister to come and join us. My grandma first accepted but refused to let us talk to my eldest sister for a while. We organized moving away to that island to live back with them, and it was.... so stressful. My sister hadn’t been answering to us since the plan had happened, i still didn’t know what i want, and i was terrified about meeting my eldest sister i have almost forgotten everything about then.

A couple of weeks before we officially had to put our stuff on the boat to that island, my grandmother called to tell us not to come close; That my eldest sister didn’t want to see us ever again, that she was furious it was even made without her accord, and that we weren’t welcomed. At the last minute, we had to reschedule the whole moving away thing to France back again. With my mom more destroyed than ever for having that hope this close and it being crushed.

I don’t even remember how i felt back then. I started developping a deadly skin disease because of stress, and this sickness still follows me to that day. So i guess I really didn’t take it well. I reached my breaking point. (it took months for my parents to actually start worrying about the fact my skin was falling apart and i was screaming in pain lmao. It took months. When I finally got to see a doctor about it i got yelled at because I was close from being worth being hospitalized because of how bad it became.)

Came back in France, troubles with my father got worse, as history knows, and my mom was crushed. My sister on the other end... well we moved back to the city she lived. But my mom was clinging to her, was quite and still is suffocating to her. And my sister never liked it. So she put on barriers, took her distances, which made my mom be worse in worse.

For what it’s worth, even if we didn’t see each other a lot, we saw each other fairly often. And my relationship with my sister had definitly changed since.

Since I came back, we are closer than we ever were. My sister isn’t someone i really have a lot in common with- not at all, and when it comes to advice, my sister tends to give some of the worst advice, or neglect how i feel, and put me into mess of situations. She doesn’t consider how i feel all that much or insist that i’m blowing things out of proportion. Yet despite this, when we are together, we smile, we laugh, we joke, we tease, we hug, we watch stuff, we have fun.

It’s far from perfect. Sometimes we have fights. sometimes they’re petty and still loving, in a way our fights weren’t before. Sometimes they are full blown fights. One of those i remember pushed me to a full blown panic attack.

But there are a lot of differences. of my sister sometimes wanting me around more, of her wanting me to meet her friends, to know her universe, things she never did before. And we get along well for two people as different as we are.

And we talked a lot about our common tr/auma. Of how we both dealt about our eldest sister, about our parents.

But with all of this, the fights we have with my sister are never things i look endearingly at thinking “yup that’s what siblings are like”. This is things that pushes me to cry and collapse because “why are we doing this again haven’t we been through enough”.

Everytime i read about “what normal siblings do”, “how normal siblings behave”, “how eldest sister are oppressed”/”if you’re a youngest child you don’t know anything about the suffering of the eldest”, this sort of posts, I spiral down exactly in all of that i just mentioned. All of that starts to haunt my mind again until i collapse crying and desperate.

My family ruined my life in every single aspect.I cannot blame my eldest sister for having ran away from it. I’m glad she did. But the abandon that came out of it destroyed me, and destroyed any relationship in this family. And even if i look more lovingly to the relationship i have with my other sister, as we are closer than before, she is still... terrible at times. In a way that I don’t think most people can relate to. Because of our family, because of our history.

And all of this mess? Even if i’m sure there’s more to it, and well, this post focuses on siblings but anyone who knows me know my relationship with my mom and father (and step families) extend all sort of stresses and things worth being depressed about. Adding the bullying and my abusive r/elationship on top of that and the fact i didn’t have proper friends before high school, and you have someone who can barely rely on people.

It ruined my mental health. I’m just symptoms over symptoms at this point. My only good personality trait is my overobsession on stuff but that’s because it’s the only way i manage to forget that this is the mess i come from. I can only define myself to what my depression and family left me. To all that tr/auma; And it’s haunting. It stops me from sleeping every night. It pushes me to the most horrible thoughts.

All while knowing I cannot change anything about it. Thinking of a future is bleak. This is all too much of a burden to think about.Even if now i’m lucky to have friends who care and love me. I don’t even know what can be the path for recovery from that point on. All I know is that the first step will be to get away from this family in one way or another, but i’m far from being able to take this step. And i’m left with my memories.

I mentioned f.rozen and how i hate how ppl bash the sibling dynamic in it in my other post and i think i can continue my point here: i don’t relate to the relationship of Elsa and Anna, but I wish i could. This is the ultimate fantasy for me. In a way my depression defines me too much, my panic attacks, all of that. But i know what it’s like to be shut away, to be abandonned for a long part of our life, to have lost controle of it, most likely because of bad advices from your parents. In a way, F.rozen talks to me because it’s the ultimate fantasy of a broken disfunctional family where the siblings eventually make it out okay and tries to mend what was broken, to try to understand why it happened, to reach out when the other is freaking out. That’s something i can never have and never will, and will never work with the types of siblings that i have. But the simple fantasy of it being something people can achieve in a fantasy world in which you can escape for 1h40? I’m so glad it exist. I love l.ilo and stiches,and i love the sibling relationship in it, but it’s not comparable. It’s more realistic, more grounded in reality. And it’s exactly what i’m running away from. The sibling conflict is nothing alike the F.rozen’s one. I hate when people pit those two movies against each other as “one being the supperior sisters movie” like apparently there’s only one way to portray siblings into movies and straying away from it is a mistake.

I’m just babbling now i have a headache from having cried the whole time i typed that.

it’s been a while i posted a T/rauma time on my tumblr.

But this is what i mean everytime i say i get mad at “sibling cultures” posts. This is what gets through my mind the whole time.

I just wish it wasn’t.

*sighs* i’ll go back to watch my movie now if you excuse me.

#ichapersonal #very long and rambly sorry #just ignore i'm just #doing myself some self t/herapy by talking it out #long post for ts #hopefully it will cut for mobile and it's just there as a warning

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yoongiandchiminie · 7 years

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CONTRARY. {MAFIA & SOULMATE AU} PART 1

Series: When you’re born, you can’t see a color until you meet the eyes of your Soulmate for the first time. Bangtan is known as one of the most infamous gangs around. This series will focus on the lighter side of things, their soulmates- Well, maybe they’re lighter. Maybe.

Genre: Angst, Mafia!AU, Soulmate!AU, Angst, Kind of Fluffy?, Lowkey Smut

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, mature themes, strong language, sexual themes

Word count: 5,906

Summary: There was no such things as Soulmates in Jungkook’s eyes until he met his own and came face to face with you. Could the Golden Boy of Bangtan have been wrong?

Jeon Jungkook didn’t care too much about most things even if he excelled in them. His only care in the world a good amount of the time was about his gang, Bangtan. Other than that it was mostly when he would get laid next. The parade of random girls to come out of his home was almost a fun game for the other members to count as their faces would disappear forever.

Your skin was smoother than the last girl he had been with. It didn't click in his head at first that he could now see the color green, but as he watched your eyes bore in his as he was eating you out it went off all at once. You didn't dare say a word, he was making you moan too much to do so. He wasn't sure you realized you could see brown now since the room was dark and with his inability to give a fuck, he didn't say anything on the matter.

As soon as the sex had ended however, he realized you did know. His eyes had begun wondering your room for the color green to study it and he slowly learned things about you. There were medals covering the walls and pictures of friends and family littering them as well. He could infer your life was cookie cutter cute just by looking and as he pulled you against his chest, he heard your small voice speak. “It was Jungkook, right? That’s what the guy yelled before I pulled you out of the bar and we ran here.”

“Yep.” he was still a bit out of breath. For some reason you not addressing the obvious was making him uneasy as ever. He’d seen you talking to Yugyeom from another gang, GOT7 and he always loved to get what the other wanted. He thought of it as a game despite the other's dismay. “That’s me. Jungkook.”

“Jungkook.” you repeated, your voice airey and cute. He could feel his heart almost flutter every time you spoke. “Kookie. Does anyone call you that?”

He chuckled and ran his fingers through your hair, “Yeah, yeah. My friends do to tease me. It sounds nice from you though.” He wasn’t quite sure why he was playing along at this point. Jungkook had this whole thing about Soulmates. He didn’t truly believe in them. He watched his parents suffer and fight for years despite being them and when they got divorced, he vowed he would have nothing to do with it.

Yet here he was, watching your figure disappearing into the grey blankets that maybe you’d mistaken as brown in the store. “Hey, put your number in my phone.” Suddenly in his hands was a nice phone with a pink case. Your screensaver was you smiling with a bunch of friends at the beach. The more he learned about you, the more sick to his stomach he felt as it churned around inside of him. However, it wasn’t enough to change his ways.

He punched his number in and carefully handed your phone back to you. His gut told him it was the right thing to do, but his brain instantly kicked in. The moment you were asleep soundly, he unlocked your phone with the code he’d watched you put in earlier and deleted his number. Then he left. Jeon Jungkook had no time for soulmates with the amount of affairs he had for himself and along with the Bangtan ones.

At a young age Jungkook was taught not to believe in any of this shit. Colors are colors and love is love. Two separate entities tied together by some fuck who decided it’d be funny to mess with people. The only love he felt (As much as he hated to admit it) was for the rest of the members of Bangtan. His mother was god knows where and his father called him once a month from whatever hell hole he was in, so Bangtan was it for him.

He arrived home at the crack of dawn and was quickly in the fridge. It was mediocrely stocked at the moment and the Maknae of the house had been swiftly avoiding going food shopping for the past few months. He just held it off long enough that someone got sick of it and eventually went. Normally it was Hoseok’s girl who did it and Jungkook had come to see her as a maternal figure. Their relationship made him want to believe in love, but the only thing he felt for that girl last night was heat. He disregarded any form of a spark as something minor even if the passion was alive in the night.

Jungkook wasn’t too good at cooking and it didn’t seem as if anyone was home that he could guilt into making him breakfast. He settled for some Lucky Charms that were going stale at this point, but he didn’t care too much. There was a moment where he almost ate the baby puffs that lined an entire cabinet, but opted out. He’d get in a lot of trouble if he tried to take his youngest in the house title back in that way.

He ended up eating more than he probably should've, but the guilt didn’t eat him alive. He figured that he should probably replace everything he ate, but he knew he wouldn’t. Time had almost slipped away as he didn’t even hear the footsteps of someone waking up to greet him. It was Namjoon, the leader of Bangtan. He greeted the younger with a corny smile which quickly turned into confusion at the fine cuisine that laid in front of Jungkook.

“How lazy are you?” he snickered and took the seat across from him, “You reek like alcohol and I suggest you shower before anyone else gets up.” Jungkook shrugged and continued to stuff his face, almost devouring the entire box of cereal. “When did you walk in?”

“Like an hour or two ago.” he responded after swallowing a spoonful of marshmallow, “Yo, the weirdest thing happened to me last night.” Namjoon twirled his hand for the other to continue. “I met my soulmate or somethin’. You know green’s a really boring color? I thought it’d be cooler.”

The leader of Bangtan choked on thin air. “And then why are you here?” The two made eye contact for a moment. While Namjoon was shocked, Jungkook’s face read disgust. “Oh, your dumb little fuckin’ thing. Dude, c’mon. Just cause your parents lied to you doesn’t mean it’s the end of Soulmate’s for you as you know it.”

“Lied? You think so?” Namjoon nodded. “I don’t give a fuck. I like my lifestyle. No strings attached.”

“Call your Dad and think your shit through, JK. Don’t break this girl’s heart because of your shitty shit. Don’t make her a straggler when you’re completely able to be there for her. She’s healthy and stuff, so give her a chance. I bet when you fucked it was awesome.” He laughed at the last part and left the room.

This little speech should have sent Jungkook into his thoughts, but instead he was focused on the smell that he’d just realized was around him. He made a sour face and cleaned off the bowl, putting it on the side of the sink instead of the dish washer. He heard people moving through the large home and basically sprinted to the bathroom so he wouldn’t have to take their shit about him smelling all day.

Upon entry to the bathroom, he locked the door and pulled a towel out of the cabinet. He placed his phone on the charger that he conveniently left in there and started running the water so it would be hot enough for him to get in. Jungkook was so intent on being annoying in any way that he could that he connected his music to the speakers that lined the walls. It was almost 9 am now so most of the people in the house should’ve been up by then.

His clothes basically peeled off of him but before he could step inside, a thought lingered in his mind about his talk with RM. “Call your dad.” Kept playing through his mind and he simply wondered how Namjoon could know more about his family than he himself. So, he shot his Dad a text asking if they could meet up for lunch today. He hadn’t seen him in a few months, but this definitely wouldn’t be too shady.

Bangtan had been around for about ten years now and Jungkook was 23. He kept in contact with his family to an extent, but he kept them at odds. He never really forgave his mother for leaving or his father for being distant, but somewhere in his deep heart he cared a bit. His childhood home was always toxic and he hated being there.

His father drank a lot and from the tabs Jungkook had been keeping, he was sober now. It’d been a couple of weeks for him and he felt a bit of pride about his father’s state. As much as he had tried to be a good Dad when he was younger, he found home in his friends. He was the youngest of the group and had become friends with them during elementary school.

Jungkook was a popular kid, but everyone has their bullies. One day a bunch of older boys had seen his father piss drunk in the middle of the day and recognized him as Kook’s dad. They were picking on him when his Dad didn’t get him from school and he instead had to walk home alone. Jimin was taking the same route home from school and even though he was shy, he helped the even shyer boy out.

Then after the two got their asses kicked, they became friends. Jimin had been Taehyung’s best friend and Yoongi was Taehyung’s mentor in some school thing from years ago. Hoseok and Namjoon were Yoongi’s two best friends and Jin was best friends with Joon. The seven of them being close just fell into place and the intense family bond they had shone through in any situation. They followed each other aimlessly and thus, Bangtan was created as well.

During his loud shower, Jungkook’s phone buzzed a multitude of times. He ended his shower early because the slight buzzing he could hear through his music was annoying him to no extent. He always managed to get ticked off by the simplest things and as of late his tolerance for such things was depleting

He patted himself off and wrapped the white towel around his waist. He had some fear of getting any kind of water on his electronics even though he was extremely dumb about them. He constantly had drinks around his super computer in his room and speakers lying around the pool and his phone was always in places it probably shouldn’t be.

His father had texted him a multitude of times, extremely excited about Jungkook reaching out. Kook just rolled his eyes at the emojis and exclamation marks, but a little part of him was happy that his father was getting better and actually cared. The little part of him that wasn’t concerned about the meeting he had tonight for new weapons with Big Bang.

They’d agreed to meet up at a restaurant near his father for lunch in about an hour and a half which meant Jungkook had to leave soon. The new place he was living was a lot further from the Bangtan Base and he knew he didn’t want to be late. He needed to know why his leader knew more than him. Allegedly.

Jungkook was a simple guy when he wasn’t trying to pick up girls. The basic white shirt and black jeans combo was what he normally went for. Today he paired it with a double pierced hat and sunglasses to mask his tired eyes. He’d slept a bit with you the night earlier, but it wasn’t enough for him.

The bed was emptier than it had been a few hours ago and upon waking up you sighed at the sight. You figured he was too good to be true. Jungkook. Your soulmate had been lying next to you hours ago and now he was gone without a goodbye. He seemed distraught upon the awakening, but you couldn’t exactly depict why. It picked at your brain as you got ready for work, but you decided not to let it bother you.

After coming to that conclusion, you continued to let it piss you off. What the fuck could you have possibly done wrong to make him erase himself? Literally fucking nothing. The night was pretty magical in your eyes and the sex was amazing, if anything. The sparks that protruded around the room as you moaned his name into the night had you excited about the future, but now it was nothing.

It simply played through your mind as you showered to get ready for work and you just got consecutively angrier. Meeting your soulmate was always something you had looked forward to in your life. Everyone around you was happy and in a relationship basically and you were constantly teased for your lack there of. Most people had found their soulmate before their twenties and here you were at 23, alone.

So, you did the next best option. You slept around a lot but vowed to stop once you found him. Now, you weren’t too sure about that. Once you got out of the shower you even discovered that he had removed his number from his phone and you couldn’t help but to feel like pang of pain hit again.

Before you left for work, you checked your mailbox with the usual bills downstairs. Except, there was a note inside of the box. It was a handwritten note on a napkin that had the logo of the bar you’d stayed at the night before on it. “I’m here for you next time.” it was written with semi nice handwriting and sighed, “Yugyeom” with a heart and a phone number next to it.

The thought that he had followed you and Jungkook back to your place didn’t even cross your mind as you texted him “Haha, the note was cute.” It was still fairly early so you didn’t exactly expect a reply, but as you got into your car to drive to the office building you worked in, your phone vibrated. “Says you.” It read and you could almost hear the smirk in his voice.

Last night, you’d spoken to the two boys together for a while before heading to the bathroom. When you’ returned, Yugyeom was gone and Jungkook was just the right amount of hot to take you home. You weren’t quite sure why you hadn’t made eye contact before that intimate moment, but you wished you had so you weren’t completely asleep when he left. The thought that he may not have even slept with you crossed your mind as well, so you were happy it didn’t happen back at the bar. The sex was probably some of the best you’d ever had.

Jungkook found himself sitting at the restaurant alone about twenty minutes after his father and himself had decided to meet. He decided to take the time alone to talk to all of the female staff that seemed to be making eyes at him. He knew he was attractive and so did the rest of the world.

He sat twirling a fork in one hand and his other was draped over a chair as he just made eye contact with everyone to pass by his table. Almost each woman stopped and asked if he needed anything, but they made sure to check if he was waiting for a date or not. He laughed off the notion and simply winked, telling them he was fine each time.

His father walked in right on queue at the half hour mark when Jungkook was debating walking out. He apologized profusely for the wait and blamed it on the traffic. He offered to pay for the meal to make up for it, but his son shrugged off the notion and said he could take care of it. After all, when you’re in one of the best gangs around loads of money tends to be one of the perks.

“So, what is it you want to speak about?” They had held small talk, but when the food had arrived his father cut right to the chase. He may have made some poor choices in the past, but he wasn’t slow in this sense. He knew his son. Well, he used to.

Jungkook was somewhat taken back by the direct approach and simply couldn’t decide which question to ask first. On one hand he could be blunt and ask why he could have possibly lied and on the other he could beat around the bush and ask why he was speaking to Namjoon. There was no question to which he would choose.

“Did you lie to me? Is mother not your soulmate?”

His father’s face sunk at the accusation and he immediately put his fork down to make eye contact with his son. “No, she isn’t.” Jungkook’s face fell. As much as he was forced to hate the idea of soulmates, he hated liars even more. “We were going to tell you the truth but then that bitch-” he caught himself as his son’s face changed at the mention of his mother. “She left and I just wanted you to hate her. I wanted you to fucking hate her, but I didn’t mean to make you hate love. I was so trapped in my own shit I didn’t consider you. I apologize.”

“Then why the fuck are you talking to Namjoon about this and not me?” he snapped and slammed his hands on the table, breaking the vase of flowers that sat between them. His force caused all of the things on the table to jump and move.

“Kookie calm down-” his father tried to console his son as his face heated up, but they both knew he was past the breaking point.

“Don’t fucking call me that!” he was screaming now and the low keyness he held before was completely out the window. He threw the money for their meals onto the table and stormed out, his father at his heels. “You don’t get the right to after ruining a portion of my life! I forgave you for my childhood and lack of! This is something that I so sinfully threw out the fucking window and now I hurt the girl that I’m suppose to-” his voice broke as he neared his car and his emotions flooded through his entire being. “The girl I’m supposed to love! You didn’t get your happy ending and you just ruined mine.”

He unlocked his car and slammed the door, but his father stood right outside. “She died, Jeon Jungkook! My soulmate died and so did your mothers! Stragglers sometimes find a haven in each other, but this didn’t work and you can’t blame us for not working!”

The enraged man slightly rolled down the window as he back out of his spot and briefly held eye contact with the other. “Don’t speak to anyone in my life or I’ll ruin yours. I’ll destroy it more than you already have.”

Then he was gone.

He drove for hours before stopping. It was forced since he his car gas light was on. He recognized the area around him that he went to in his haze and it was near you. The apartment you two had been in together hours ago and the apartment he left you in. Instead of going to a gas station he pulled into a spot in front of the building and his long limbs walked him to the locked door to wait for your green eyes.

There was a chance you could be inside and there was a chance you would just run right by him, but even the small bit that he could apologize mattered. He didn’t want to end up like his father; A liar who couldn’t atone for his sins until he was approached. He didn’t want to be like his mother; A woman who just left the son she’d given raised for the past years.

Jeon Jungkook wanted to become his own person and that meant fixing his attitude. He’d blown off the weapons trade and turned off his phone to do so. If Bangtan wanted to find him, they’d be in his face within moments. They knew he was lost in his thoughts and had to find his way out alone.

It wasn’t until your green eyes were focused on another's red hair as you approached the door. He store up with half lidded eyes as he watched you walk towards your apartment with none other than Kim Yugyeom. There was nothing happening between the two of you other than laughter, but Jungkook thought he knew better. No. He knew that fuck from GOT7 better than you ever would.

This was all apart of his game. All the other wanted was what Jungkook himself had, but you weren’t willing to give it to him. You didn't know anything of their rivalry and just wanted a friend to spend your day with. Your plan was to watch some movies, while Bangtan’s finest knew about the other intentions in the red heads mind.

“Are you fucking joking?” Jungkook took long strides over and shocked you, causing you to jump behind your newly found friend.

“You vanished.” your eyes began to well with tears from the sheer emotion that your soulmate was displaying. You weren’t scared or anything, but you could just feel how hurt he was. How something was wrong.

“Well, I’m here to apologize.” his voice was sincere as he attempted to dodge around the taller to make the ever fated eye contact with you.

“And how do we know that for sure?” Yugyeom was testy and easily ready to take matters into his own hands to get what he wanted. GOT7 and Bangtan were currently on good terms, but Jungkook was ready to blow it all to make it up to her. Whoever she was, she was his soulmate and he wanted to learn more.

Jungkook met your saturated eyes and you could almost pass out from the intensity being lit in the area. Between you and him and between the two men you were with. “She knows.” Jungkook’s voice was strong, but you could feel the vulnerability within it and nodded. Yugyeom scoffed and his friendly facade faded back into his fuckboy one.

“Yeah, whatever.” he waved the pair of soulmates off and strode away with no other words. The lack of confrontation was unheard of, but there was probably some ulterior motive. Most likely Jaebum ordered him not to start unnecessary shit. Again.

“Why are you so upset?” you asked, quite unsure of why you were doing so. Yes, Yugyeom had made you feel better about the situation in a way. He’d told you that Jungkook was just some lonely boy from the rich side of town who always got what he wanted. It wasn’t necessarily true but it made you feel better about being ditched. Your question was followed by a brief mumble to yourself saying, “Why do I even care…?”

Jungkook ignored your latter comment and took the kind opportunity to walk over to you and wrap his arm around your waist. Some little thing inside you couldn’t find the anger you’d previously held to push him away and instead let the two of you into your building. “We can talk when we get upstairs.” he stated and held the door open for the two of you to walk through.

The walk upstairs was silent, but you could just feel the raw emotion emitted from his entire being. His touch was directly emulating the feeling towards your kind soul and you couldn’t help but want to make him feel better. Being someone’s soulmate was a big deal in your eyes and if he was willing to get passed what he’d done, you’d consider it as well.

A dark thought of if he did this right away, what was he capable down the road loomed in the back of your thoughts. The only thing scaring it away was the sheer desire to be loved by someone who was fully capable to do so. Who was destined to love you.

His eyes watched your every motion as you unlocked the door and quickly shed your shoes and coat to become more comfortable. He repeated your actions, already feeling at home. You made your way over to the couch and both took a seat. You attempted to create a space in the middle, but he wasn't having it. He'd wasted all this time already that he couldn't waste anymore.

There was a long sigh before he began to speak and anxiety rode high within it. “My parents-” he sighed again and began to tap his fingers along his own thigh. “I’m sorry for leaving you without a word.”

“And deleting your number.” you butt in, attempting to ease the tension with a light tone. “How’d you get into my phone anyways?”

“And deleting my number. The last part- is another time. I’ll tell you later.” you opened your mouth to speak again but as he sighed you decided to hold your tongue. “I grew up my entire life thinking that this whole soulmate thing was a waste of my time. It was nothing personal to you and as I talk, I want you to slowly understand that you did nothing wrong last night. You were perfect.”

A light pink blush tinted your cheeks and you stood up, facing away from him. You glanced at him for a moment as you walked over to the kitchen behind the couch. “If it’s going to be a long story, we may as well have food and drinks. I’m starving and I can hear your stomach through your tears.”

“I haven’t cried.” he was quick to fend himself some from casual playing around. He just shot a smooth smile towards you and cleared his throat to continue. “My parents had gone on and on about how they were soulmates, but today I found out they lied to me. That’s the only way I can put this, truthfully. I don’t have much of a conscious left on me anymore and that’s mainly due to my line of work but you were just fresh on my mind in a way. It wasn’t like your naked body under mine was stuck in my thoughts or the way my name sounded from your pretty pink li-”

He shut off his thoughts about last night upon noticing embarrassed look your face gave and cleared his throat again as you stepped over with a bowl of doritos and soda. “Anyways, I didn't want you to be upset. The image of you waking up alone this morning played through my head and god damn I wish I would have known sooner so maybe I could have been there.”

You tucked your knees into your chest and leaned against the opposite arm of the couch from him as he inched closer to rest his hand on your knee. “So you just want me to forget about it?” you held back the automatic intention of wanting to roll your eyes and instead just made eye contact with his glimmering ones. “Jungkook-”

“I love the way you say my name.” he interrupted and leaned above your legs towards your face to ensure that he could study the color within your orbs. “I loved the feeling that ran through my body just now. An overwhelming feeling of- love. I think it’s love. I don’t get too much of it outside of my ga- my friends. It’s a little foreign in this sense, but I felt it. I know you did too.”

Words weren’t really able to be formed in this moment and instead you held the eye contact that sparked your entire reason to speak to him. The feelings ran rampant in between the two of you and it was almost predictable that within the same moment you’d both lean in for a smooth kiss. You dropped the guard you had up (and your legs) and embraced the man who was hovering above you, lips connected with your own.

The kiss from a view was nothing special, but for the two of you there was a connection. He was trying to be genuine and make up for what he had done and it was apparent to you that anything to do with intimacy was his way of showing it. His lips were chapped and a bit rough, but it didn’t bother you in the slightest sense. You let your body relax as he completely moved over you, legs on both sides.

The kiss stayed sweet until he pulled away and began to place smaller ones down your body. The memories of last night flashed within both of your minds as he trailed his lips down your face and neck, stopping around the slight amount of cleavage that was exposed. Before anything else happened, he stopped and moved off of you.

Jungkook thought there would be more of a shock factor from the sudden break, but as little as you two knew, you were slightly in sync. He took his seat back on the couch and moved your body onto his to keep the skin on skin alive in his own mind.

“Why do you-” you sighed and he laughed, thinking of the many he’d just partaken in. “What is your job that you’re so cold?” you took the brief silence to move off of his lap and next to him again, much to his dismay.

“My job?” he let out a small chuckle and his eyes darted to his shoes that were kicking the carpeted floor. “What’s your job?”

“I work in an office in a tiny cubicle in the city. It’s nothing special, but it’s never what I thought I would amount to.” he turned his face towards yours and cocked his head to the left side as a question as to why. “I was an athlete when I was younger, you see. I was a freestyle swimmer, but I hurt my shoulder and was told I was no longer able to continue. At that point I was 19 and my life felt over. All my friends had careers and were with somebody- so I gave up on a career and took this job, hoping my Prince Charming would whisk me away.”

Your body language had changed as you spoke, now more droopy and closed in. As much as the past was the past, it still affected your present. It clouded your thoughts on the dark days and was a constant reminder that you were in a rut currently. As happy as your were with your beach days and nights out, you were alone. Hopefully that was over.

“Well, I’m no Prince Charming.” he slung his long arm around your tight shoulders and raked you closer to his body. “But I can try as hard as I can to give you some kind of happy ending. There’s a lot of things that I- I have going on in my life and within a day of knowing you I’ve blown it off. My job is an all of the time job, but because of that you can quit. You don’t have to work as long as I’m alive.”

You’d found yourself rested on his chest and your fingers were dancing across the fabric covering it. His breathing slowed as you looked up at him again after his words with a shocked face. “What do you mean? Jungkook, what do you do?”

He could feel his normal attitude shifting with just the tone of her voice and he knew as much as he was previously against it, he could see himself throwing so much away from her. She was the opposite of everything the Golden Boy had built himself up to be. She was pure and kind, but broken. He could sense she would drop anything for someone he cared about and he wanted to aspire to be like that. Instead, he was dangerous and everything she wished she could be.

“I’m in Bangtan.” with those three words, the scars she’d noticed last night made sense. The fresh ones and the ones that were faded all made sense. As you spoke of such dangerous matters, you position didn’t shift and instead you found yourself further inclined to be close with this man.

“Yugyeom too?”

“He’s in a different gang- Are you okay with hearing this? I’ve had friends whose girls have freaked the fuck out at the mention of the mafia and you're just asking questions?” a chuckle slipped through his mouth and he kissed the top of your head. “God I wish I wasn’t so fucked up last night, I’ve lost some precious time with you.”

“Am I going to be safe?”

You felt his grip on you tighten and he just nodded. You knew from the slight breeze moving your hair without even looking. “I’ll make sure of it- but I want you to come home with me tonight. Everyone’s going to be mad at me, but I want to show them the gorgeous girl I ditched them for.”

“So I’m your scapegoat?” you couldn’t help but to laugh in the moment and he joined in as well.

“Ah, it’s partly that, but I don’t know what Yugyeom is going to do with the information you may have slipped tonight. He knows you’re my soulmate?” you nodded. “And where you work?” A predictable nod. “Then you’re definitely coming over tonight. As much as I like to pride myself on being the best in Bangtan- I’m definitely not the brains.”

“You’re the muscle pig.” you whispered, but he laughed at the words that breezed by his ears. You stood up and left him on the couch to go and pack a bag. There was something strange about the way you were acting. It was so unlike you to jump along into a foreign land you’d only heard about for a brief moment.

Before this, your whole life was built on paying it safe. You were good at swimming? Keep going. That got fucked up? Take the safe route and work in an office until someone comes along to make you their little housewife waiting at home. While that certainly wasn’t this situation, you found yourself playing into it as if you’d prepared your entire life for this moment here.

There were no calculations you found yourself acting upon and no regulations you had to follow. You most certainly hadn’t tried it, but this could be true love. The act of following so blindly. All you could feel was the danger lurking ahead, but you weren’t afraid. You weren’t alone this time.

“Y/N.” he spoke your name as the door to your bedroom was almost shut with you on the other side. “I’ll be right here when you get back. I promise.”

Author's Note: Hey everyone! Now you get you know all about Jungkook too! Kind of. I hope you enjoyed this and I wanna say a big thank you for reading and following this series if you have been. I’ve been having some trouble writing it, but I’m enjoying it none the less. Please let me know what you think whether it be messaging me or replying to this! I’d love to know your thoughts and answer any questions.

Have an amazing day & expect more soon.

Hoseok’s installment!

Taehyung’s installment!

Yoongi’s installment!

Jimin’s installment!

Jin’s installment!

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comeondowntosouthparkrpg-blog · 6 years

Text

Stan Marsh

out of character info

Name/Alias: JIM JAM SAM Pronouns: all Age: 19 Join Our Discord: done binch Timezone: est Activity: u know this by now Triggers: nothing that needs to be tagged Password: dildo Character that you’re applying for: Stan Marsh Favourite ships for your character: stendy, style, stan/everyone, stan/chemistry

in character info

Full name: Stanley “Stan” Marsh Birthday: October 19 Sexuality, gender, pronouns: bisexual, not that he mentions it or really “came out”, but if you asked he’d say so. cis male. he/him, but he’s cool with they/them. Age and grade: 18, senior Appearance:

Stan has a very pretty face, outlined by a strong jawline. He has deep blue eyes, with nothing interesting about them. They don’t change color, or have flecks of green or hazel in them, they’re just blue. His hair is black, but dark brown when viewed in the sunlight. When growing it out it has a lot of volume, not that you can tell from his frequent hat-hair, and though it’s cut short every few months, Stan has his hair longer for most of the year, keeping the sides trimmed with help from his mom and a pair of trimmers. This results in him having the “fuckboy” haircut, which he will keep back under a hat or simply keep back with pomade, if he’s hatless and wants to look decent.

He’s 6’1, making him one of the tallest out of his classmates. However, he’s second tallest in his family, being an inch shorter than his dad. As well as tall, Stan is also rather muscular, toned from playing football in the fall, baseball in the spring, and maintaining a relative level of fitness throughout his sport-free months with some regular gym visits, (which he thinks helps him maintain a decent mood, too.) He’s pretty much as pale as the next guy during the winter, but Stan tans very easily. He gets a good tan during the summer, which starts to lighten up until wearing off early October. Stan’s wardrobe is not very diverse, and is a little fuckboy-like. He can usually be seen wearing jeans or chinos, a t-shirt, and a jacket/hoodie, or if it’s warm out, some basketball shorts or still jeans and a t-shirt or tank top. On special occasions he can be seen in nice button ups and pants, or even a suit. He is almost always wearing a hat. During the cold 75% of the year he wears a winter hat, and in the summer he wears baseball caps.

Personality:

Stan, in his own way, is an artistic tortured soul, but not really. He’s the all-american guy, successful in athletics, he tends keep his grades above average, and while he doesn’t feel special about all that, his parents proudly try showing him off like he’s the best. Though he has every reason to be happy with his life, Stan’s still a cynical asshole, and finds himself spending a lot of time complaining about really anything. At heart, though, he’s kind, hard-working guy who cares about his friends, is loyal, is passionate, always has good intentions, and doesn’t want anybody to get hurt. He’s a force for justice and balance, and he has a strong moral compass.

His love for animals never stopped, as he finds himself volunteering at animal shelters, while he should be busy at football or baseball practice. He can’t help that he cares about every living thing, (animals more than people, though.) A romantic at heart, he doesn’t show real, genuine interest – the ‘I’m about to vomit’ kind, for him, – in someone very often. He won’t fall for someone easily, but when he does fall for someone it happens pretty hard, and he will do anything for them just like he would with anyone else that he cares about. With a big heart and an open mind, which he uses to try to make sure his dad isn’t doing something stupid, Stan is always ready to try to be with someone. However, he is often worries that the bad sides of his personality –– being unmotivated, cynical at times, impulsive, combined with having an addictive personality, a bad temper, and a great ability to be a dick, –– will throw all his relationships in jeopardy.

History:

Stan feels like he had a terrible childhood. Although he enjoyed his early years, tossing the football with his dad, falling asleep in his parent’s bed when he had nightmares, and overall a peaceful life in a loving family –– except for frequent bullying from Shelly –– his life had taken a turn for the worst, around the time he was eight. His family life was chaotic. His parents fought a lot, even getting divorced twice, and even while they were together they were a lot to deal with. Well, Randy was a lot to deal with. He’s constantly taking care of his dad and watching out for him, trying to make sure he’s not up to his usual antics. However, he has always loved his parents, and has a good relationship with his mom, and even with his dad when it’s not being strained by one of his dad’s episodes.

Around nine years old was the apex of the craziness in his life, it seemed, with the weirdest things going on in his little mountain town. During this time, though, was when Stan developed and proved the largest parts of his personality, like his loyalty, but also his fierce cynicism. He started to see everything as bullshit, and always has a hard time believing anything is more than that. This was also when he started something of a battle with alcoholism, not that it was ever too bad in his mind. He started to be something of a high-functioning alcoholic, as it didn’t really interfere with his life, despite a few problems with friends early on in the struggle.

Throughout middle school and into high school he began to spend even more time than usual with his friends, in order to avoid his crazy dad and the stress of his family. Stan was always up for adventures with his Super Best Friend Kyle and his other close friends Eric and Kenny. Due to his cynicism and lack of motivation with others, though, he did struggle to become close friends with anyone else. Even with Wendy, his childhood crush and girlfriend, he had a hard time maintaining anything more than a very loose friendship. Stan was nothing more than friendly acquaintances with most people. Despite that, he was still pretty well-liked by most of his peers, with his kindness, success in sports, and his natural ability to comfort people all being well known by the student body.

Now a senior, Stan Marsh is often considered South Park’s top dog, as captain of two varsity teams and, due more to hard work than intelligence, maintaining an A- average. However, he still struggles a lot to cope with how he feels about his life situation, drinking himself to sleep at night, or sneaking out to be with his friends and do anything but think about being trapped in where he is in life. He does hope to get the year over with quickly and, although he is afraid of being apart from his friend, he’s looking forward to get out of his bullshit town.

Sample paragraph:

“Duuude. Where the hell are you?” Stan’s voice raised to a clamor, words slurring together slightly, his unsteady footsteps coming to a halt mid-wander. The first attempt he made of searching for his friend was short lived, ending as he threw his head back to drink from the can, a repetitive action that nice considering the many cans his hands had cradled over the course of the night. Stan and his friends had their fair share of the cheap, but potent, beer, now finishing off the rest of the supply he had grabbed the back seat of his truck. His hand crushed the now-empty can and let it fall to the snow-covered ground. “Kenny?” he called out, his eyes searching around the nearly empty street.

Taking a break from his wandering along one of the town’s streets, Stan kept trying to figure out where he was without much luck. Intoxication left his vision blurry, making the road, which he could’ve easily identified if he was the slightest bit sober, now completely unrecognizable. He started walking again, before stopping in his tracks and turning quickly, picking up the can he had realized he left on the ground. After all, ‘there was only one planet’, and as lame as it was that he even thought that Stan was glad his concern for the environment was slightly more powerful than his drunkenness.

As he once again continued down the road, he kept yelling for his friend. “Oh my god, did someone kill you?” It was meant to be a joke, but there was some serious concern lingering in his voice. Minutes passed, and he didn’t know how long it took but Kenny eventually came into view from beyond a corner, probably from hearing his name, or realizing his friend had lost his trail. What a relief.

“Dude.. don’t disappear like that,” Stan told him through something of a chuckle once he had caught up. Following his friend, they turned the corner again, where Kenny stopped. With an exasperated sigh, Stan leaned against the wall of the building, then slid down to sit, unbothered by the dirty, wet snow that now cushioned his bottom. He groaned and buried his head in his hand, sitting there for a few minutes, glad that Kenny understood his need for some quiet –– he always did.

Once a few minutes passed, the complete silence was interrupted by a small clicking noise. Stan looked up, watching Kenny’s thumb stroke the wheel of a disposable lighter over and over, up until it finally created a small flash of sparks in the dark night. He watched as the flame was brought to the end of a fresh cigarette, while his off hand protected the fragile little light from the winter’s breeze. As Kenny lit the cigarette, Stan nudged his friend’s leg to get his attention, slurring his question of “Dude, can I bum one off you? I promise I’ll buy you a new pack tomorrow, but you know I like to smoke when I drink.”

Stan thanked his friend when he obliged and grabbed the cigarette and the lighter from the hand that stretched out towards him. He held the cigarette between his teeth and placed the lighter on his knee as he pulled off his gloves, then lit the cigarette. He watched his hand shake in the cold as it brought the filter end to his mouth, and he inhaled some of the smoke, but was quick to exhale and cough a little bit. After a few more puffs of smoke, his coughing subsided, and he was able to lean back and relax again, closing his eyes as he felt it hit his system.

After a few minutes, he sighed and opened his eyes again, holding his cigarette-free hand out towards Kenny with the lighter in it. The other was brought back to his mouth as he took a final breath of cigarette smoke, exhaling dramatically through his nose as he ashed the butt in the snow beside him. “Thanks for coming out with me tonight, Kenny,” he muttered, closing his eyes once more and feeling his lips curl into something of a smile. “I really needed to just get away from it all. Means a lot that you came with.”

Headcanons:

Stan has always been a pretty big Broncos fan, and still practically idolizes John Elway. Don't mess with him on game day –– he'll be glad to let you watch with him, but he'll get mad if he's trying to pay attention and you distract him.

He has a pretty decent knowledge of fixing cars, since he drives his dad’s old truck and needs to fix it pretty often.

He’s absolutely the friend you call if you’re feeling suicidal and need someone to talk to you. Even someone he hated could call him and he’d help.

He has a fleeting alcohol problem. He is an emotional drunk. Drank too much? He’s in a dark corner questioning life. He cries after seeing mildly sad things. If anyone lets him cry on their shoulder he’ll stick to them like glue for the rest of the night.

Stan hasn’t grown out of his asthma, and still carries an inhaler around in his backpack during school, and has it nearby when he’s working out or doing sports. He can usually tell when he needs to use it before he gets full blown asthma attacks, so he hasn’t had one in a couple years.

He gets super toxic in videogames. He tries to be nice and be a good team player, but if he’s tired of dealing with stupid teammates he just gets pissed.

Stan struggles with his depression. Though he carries himself like it’s nothing, he often has pretty bad episodes where he needs to reach out to a friend. Usually, it’s his SBF.

His dog Sparky is an old man, who sleeps in Stan’s bed. Also, halfway through his junior year, he convinced his family to rescue a pitbull mix named Pepper. He cuddles up with them like every night.

While he’s something of a pacifist and doesn’t like to solve problems with violence, he is unafraid to throw hands to stand up for himself or his friends.

He’s pretty well known as the South Park High football’s “Star Quarterback” as well as the baseball team’s pitcher. Although he used to hate baseball as a kid, he grew into it after years of playing when he discovered that a spring sport was nice for the same reasons he liked playing football in the fall: the exercise and teamwork mentality was a good source of therapy for him.

Sees you eating veal? He fucking decks you. Okay, not really, but he will keep a mental note of it and/or try to tell you not to.

Given his love of animals, he only eats meat from local small farms that treat their animals well, or wild caught fish.

He has a summer job working on an independent ranch in South Colorado, tending to the livestock. He stays there for the summer in the employee housing, but will drive back up to South Park to see his friends when he has days off.

During the school year, he works as a receptionist at the veterinarian office in South Park.

He likes to stay up late, but usually regrets it in the morning.Ends up falling asleep while trying to do anything late at night. He often falls asleep fully dressed then wakes up at some point and showers and changes

Stan goes on camping trips a lot, because they’re very calming for him and, as much as he likes his TV, video games, and everything, he needs a break and loves his time out in nature.

He’s extremely ticklish on his sides –– if someone hugs him by surprise or nudges him on the side, he flinches. He won’t tell anyone he’s actually ticklish to avoid any mean-spirited or teasing tickling.

He gets easily overstimulated by a bunch of noise, like if there are too many people talking to him at once, or talking around him. He needs to take breaks during social events like parties, or else he’ll get a headache.

Stan’s very easily distracted. Not that he’ll get distracted constantly, and can’t focus on anything at all, he just tends to daydream, or he often makes the choice not to stay focused if there is something more interesting to pay attention to.

Spends a ridiculous amount of time making sure randy isn’t up to something stupid. Seriously, it’s exhausting.

Anything else: u kno i had to

#Stan three #Stan marsh #accepted #admin Sam #submission

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