#and scheduling hangouts with online friends once a week as well. or voice calling | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

frecklystars · 5 months

Note

Hi frecklydork!! I just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you- I just got out of a convo w/ a therapist where I realized I was in a really bad relationship and she mentioned I was displaying PTSD like symptoms. I just wanted you to know that theres someone out there who's super super super DUPER proud of you and all the work you've put into managing your PTSD- Feeling constant overwhelming anxiety helped me understand a little of what you must be going through, I can't imagine how stressful your day to day life is and I'm feeling overwhelmed rn! I hope you can take some comfort in this

Goodnight! Or Good day, or good morning whenever you get this!

Hi sweetheart. I'm so sorry to hear that you have gone through a relationship so devastating that it left this much of an impact on you. My heart goes out to you, it's not fun, to say the least, it is a really horrible time and it's especially difficult (in my opinion) when it's repetitive actions from someone you trusted... it's like an extra layer of betrayal on top of everything else. I'm so sorry. I know how badly that hurts.

My response is kind of long so I'm gonna put it under a readmore for ya:

I am so touched that you thought of me, and even more touched that you took the time out of your day to tell me that you thought of me. I hope you don't mind it took me a few days to finally crack open my inbox. I reread this a few times because it really warmed my heart. Thank you for being proud of me. I'm so proud of you, too. I'm so happy you've (I'm assuming, hoping, praying) gotten out of the relationship, or in the very least I'm reassured that you've realized how unhealthy the relationship was for you and you can take the steps to overcome and heal from it now. It's SO HARD getting out of relationships, but nobody else can do it for you, it's always you who has to take those steps, and I'm so proud of you for pushing yourself to take those steps!!!! I know it isn't easy!!!!! I think one of the loneliest feelings in the world is knowing that you're in an unhealthy friendship/relationship with someone and you can literally feel this person draining your energy and making you feel hopeless and worthless and numb. I have never felt more empty than when I was trapped in an emotionally abusive relationship/friendship. It's awful. Getting out of that kind of situation is so difficult, so I am so damn proud of you for recognizing that you deserve better!!! Because you do!!! You deserve the whole world and I'm sorry somebody didn't give you the respect you deserved. It's not your fault. Nothing you went through is your fault at all, and I'll say that as many times as you want to hear it.

I completely hear you on the stress side of things -- thank you for empathizing with me. My God, isn't it the fucking worst? The constant stress?? I PROMISE YOU IT GETS BETTER, I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE!!!!!!!!!! I am finally at a point where my anxiety is not killing me 24/7. It took a hot fuckin minute to get here, but I am at a point now where my anxiety will only eat at me for a chunk of my day instead of my whole day. Getting into the Barbie movie literally saved my life. But, like... it's literally a stress disorder, an anxiety disorder. That feeling of it literally EATING at you every single second that you're awake, and even giving you nightmares when you're asleep -- jesus!!! it's so much!!! it's!!! A LOT and it's intense and it's like you never get any peace. BUT I PROMISE IT GETS BETTER!!!!! 😭😭💙💙💙 IT GETS BETTER ANON I SWEAR TO YOU. I AM HOLDING YOUR HAND THROUGH THIS WHOLE THING!!!!!

One day you will wake up and the person who traumatized you, the events that traumatized you, will NOT be the very first thing popping into your head. One day you'll be able to sit down and eat a sandwich and think to yourself "oh I just went 20 whole seconds without thinking about it". One day you'll be tying your shoe and thinking "oh I think i just went five whole minutes without thinking about it!" slowly, gradually, you will have healed so much, you will look back and think "oh. I'm... so much better than I was."

I actually had this revelation a few weeks ago, I sat down making comics, and then I thought to myself... "...oh... I don't think I thought about my abuser... at all... when a trigger was right in front of my face... for a solid two minutes." I saw a gifset where Margot Robbie was wearing an article of clothing that normally triggers me into a panic attack, but I just kept looking at Margot and thinking "hehehe that's my Barbie!!! <3" and then i realized the trigger was right in front of my face but I was so focused on being gay asf I didn't even realize the trigger was there. And then when I noticed it, my body was like "oh. time to panic" but I managed to push away those feelings and say "nope. nope. that's Barbie. and Barbie is safe. and everything is ok!!!" And two minutes of handling a certain trigger may not seem like a long time, at first... but when you're constantly overwhelmed every single second of every single day... two minutes looks like a blessing. and one day you won't even have to count the minutes anymore. you'll just exist and the misery will only be momentary.

But aside from triggers, now, just in general, I am at a point where I can go hours without remembering my abuser or the events that gave me literally DOZENS of triggers in the first place. Flashbacks are rare, when they used to be constant. I'm not as jittery as I used to be, I'm not as... uh, feeling like I'm going out of my mind, I don't know how else to phrase it, but the anxiety that ptsd gives you literally makes you feel like you're losing your sense of self, and I promise you that feeling goes away with time. I promise you it gets better. I didn't have a support system during my time of need, so my healing process is taking much longer than it would have, so I am hopeful that your healing process is actually going much speedier than mine, even if our circumstances may not be exactly the same ofc but just hearing that you have a therapist helping you out with this is absolutely wonderful. Therapy is so important, paired with self care.

I'm so proud of you anon. I'm so sorry you're going through this and ahhh sorry I'm scatterbrained, it's been a long day and my brain cells are on fire, but!!! I AM SO PROUD OF YOU and I LOVE YOU and IT'S GONNA BE OKAY!!!! IT'S GONNA GET BETTER!!!!!! That feeling of constant anxiety 24/7 is an absolute bitch, but it gets better!!! It gets better!!!! I'll say it a million times, it gets better!!!! And I'm here for you the whole way okay? Please feel free to message me anytime. Ilusm I'm sending you so many hugs and I will be keeping you in my thoughts. 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

#thank you for taking the time to empathize with me holy shit #i feel like a lot of ppl dont rly. understand ptsd. unless if they have it. which is normal ofc #or just trauma in general. which is fine! u cant fully understand smth til u go thru it #so when you mentioned the CONSTANT anxiety i was just nodding my head while reading #24/7 your brain is making you remember things you wish you could forget and it aint fun #tips: journal your thoughts everyday to reduce nightmares #bc it helps your brain process things while its awake #so it wont process AS much when youre asleep. that way you get BETTER sleep #more tips: sleeping is so good for u. drinking water is so good for ur Scared Brain #EXERCISING!!!! going for walks in the sunlight helps you with vitamin D + tiring u out faster #so u can sleep easier. bc again. oh my god the sleep is so important.#and sleep is the thing i struggle with the most i only get 3 or 4 hours every night #being social helps so much. im going out with friends at LEAST once a week #and scheduling hangouts with online friends once a week as well. or voice calling #i know it hurts so fucking bad right now but i promise it gets better #i am holding your hand the entire time ok you're not alone. im here for you.#anonymous #asks #ptsd #keepsake

4 notes · View notes

musicbizgradstud · 4 years

Text

week ONE - kinda (you’ll see what i mean)

Wowzers. We are really out here. I would content that this is the end of the first week. I got to meet my classmates, take one class, do an assload of reading and meet my first classmate IRL. And I’ve done some thinking about what the hell this program is about. Some of which has been really nice and wholesome, and some of which leaves me with a lot of question marks.

Okay just took a hit from my blunt lets goooo.

It’s 2020 and I’m a college student. My school luckily has been fairly communicative about the “expectations.” So pretty early on in the summer we knew that we were going to be online. That this was going to be a virtual exchanges. Now I’ll admit that I had a fair share of blind optimism of it all going to be “fine” and it all going to “work out great.” Without giving too much thought to what any of that would really feel like or mean. So as people were asking me what it’s like or how I was feeling about it, I found that question complicated because I Was figuring what i wanted my answer to be, but i didn’t know if I was going to like it. (I guess i wanted to like my answer which wasn’t the question. ah well.)

I met with a second year student to buy some books from them (side not buy the 2nd edition of winogradskys book, trust me). They were a little older, did a career pivot and entered the program. The previous career was not related to music at all. They had an internship turned job, a research gig, and managing “a few” artists. ONE YEAR. HALF OF IT IN A PANDEMIC. now i don’t know the steps, pace or how it went down. I just feel compelled to say that a lot happened and as I see this person next I’ll comment that I just am flabbergasted that they accomplished so much. Was the info they got from classes that helpful? Did they have a rich friend? Did the profs turn it out? I have some thoughts.

**so classes did a lot to simulate thought, provide examples, and share information. So for this particular student, they emphasized the extra-circular aspect as what was important. The classes provided them tons of the nuts and bolts. Contracts, parts of the business, publishing, rights mgmt. There were lots of shows. (This is what i see as the kicker) Going to shows is where you could see people participating in their projects. Meet/see their friends who are in their orbit. Get an idea of how the world turns in a few different scenes. Through that, since you’re more or less an adult, you can make those kind of contacts faster. People just generally seem more interested in what you do, and trying to find tethers or connections b/t them and you. Sometimes it turns into a coffee. Or a biz meeting. But at the shows, people are chill. people are down to chat with randos. As a music business student, you can totally market your skills as a manger. You basically see the world of music and the ways it makes money. Great managers want to make money. So as a graduate educating/ed strapping young manager, you have a leg above other young strapping managers. And for the internship, depending on the program, I can actually see lots of companies wanting to keep people around for more than a semester if the work they do is good. It might not be full-time or dream paychecks, but it gets your resume started and due to inertia, you may be able to stick around. it is also, as a side note, helpful in terms of creating a center of gravity.

CENTER OF GRAVITY: When I worked in coffee, after about a year and a half, I had built my center. I worked for a certain company full-time so i spend lots of hours there. People who worked for other companies in the same industry would come through. The ones I was friendly with I would take more care to say hi and hear about how they’re doing. On my days off, I would visit them at their jobs, and even at the later stages, I would be interacting with them On a professional2professional basis. As my company grew and our “scene” grew, as I would be building my week to week schedule all things felt in sync. Going out was an easy thing to arrange, getting people together was simple to arrange because everyone’s life rhymed. All ended work at a certain point. All started basically around the same time. All encountered similar day to day #1 world probz. There were also natural breaks where when i needed to get away to visit a friend or different group, i could break the rhyme and rejoin it almost effortlessly. So in regards to music. Once that rhyme gets established, your work breeds interaction with local people/places/activities/cultural moments/movements etc. Then you take those common understandings to others who work, and your play becomes an extension of your work, but in a meaningful way (you choose who you’re cool with to chill). You figure out what is the “go-to” hangout, you are socialized enough to be comfortable making choices that suit your needs. Not feeling overly worried about what a decision might mean or if it’ll negatively effect you. Life becomes similar. Then as my world felt more established, it even felt easier to meet other people. They saw my life and its patterns and I could glimpse and see theirs.

What is fascinating right now is that I am getting used to a completely different style. I don’t understand it. I don’t know where I fit. I don’t even know if there is a fit right now.

We finally when they hosted orientation for all 30 of us last Monday. The moment where I would meet the next “cohort” of professionals entering the music industry. It was an hour long zoom call with 30+ participants. 30 of us students and four or so faculty/staff members. It was hectic and gnarly to say the least. So many new faces, marred with expectations of what I thought they were going to be like meeting the reality. Lots of working people. I think what is pretty evident is that with the exception of three or so students, of those working in music right now, everyone is loaded with the side hustles. Being a “project manager/marketer/label mgmt/etc. Etc.” To some of those people I’m just amazed that they feel they have enough time to dedicate to full-time school. We did a little ice breaker where we did names, where were calling from, undergrad degree, “fun fact” (I h8 fun facts. Like what the fuck). I didn’t take notes, but I saw the whirl of information, people and backgrounds from all over the place. There were no two similar people. It was actually pretty beautiful. The power that this cohort can have on sheer experience alone is pretty fab.

///

First class was hilarious because we all reintroduced ourselves (kind of for the prof), but in a big way for all of us. We got to see faces, hear names and context. So no hate here. The prof had sent out three questions to keep in mind. These questions lead me to do additional research outside of the assigned readings. So i had a jumbled pil;e of thoughts assembled and the prof started a question as a line of thinking. Difficult to track where the conversation was going, I saw classmates pipe in, sharing experiences, thoughts, real-world examples. I was just fit to be tied. I had so many thoughts. I didn’t voice a single one because i dind’t know how to use the technology to my advantage. (Next time i’ll use the chat to pipe in an additional thought, but if i have an urgent or concept changing idea i’ll raise my hand.

The debate was 1st amendment protections vs. copyright. Copyright is a limited length monopoly over a creative work. 1st amendment rights guarantees an individual the right to express themselves w/o worry of damnation. But what if what you want to express is a copyrighted material? Well. There are a few things that the law sets up to give temporary lapse to that limited monopoly. Sadly, systematically those lapses in the law, have generally benefited white creators/performers and left behind style-defining black and colored creators. The law not benefitted them as a Jim Crow feeling law. But as a problem with how the law was interpreted and acted on by companies in the scene. How they used the law to make a profit. To give an example. Little Richard is often considered the father of rock and roll. The ways in which he influenced later generations is unparalleled. Set up an industry that is making millions of millions of dollars. Talk about cultural relevance right? You would think someone (or their estate) that has their style and influence in so many places would be sitting pretty. Well. The law only guarantees you to so much. If you were a songwriter, you are compensated for a number of rights. Public performance/mechanicals etc. These rates are set by the government. You can calculate pretty easily where your payout is. But it is ONLY for a few streams.Right now the rates are pretty low, they’ve been set low for a long time.So lets say you are lucky and you are Also the recording artist.well cool! You get another pot of royalty money from the exploitation of your recording which contains your vocal flair, aesthetic energy. It’s great. Those rates are also set, but in a private negotiations. So your rate could be pretty high. Oh you also get lump sums of money against advance so there is cash flow™️. The other advantage is that if you aren’t the songwriter, you can benefit almost seemingly MORE than the writer because you have streams that are attached to you because you offered a “performacne” of it and that is what sticks with audiences. So sadly songs written, stylished and performed by little Richard originally can be re-purposed, re-recorded basically copying and the songwriter is obliged to allow you to do this. In fact publishing companies really can’t give an F. They get additional mechanical royalties but it just *FEELS* wrong. You can copy a Black artists style, voice and dance moves for the profit of your creative pursuit and only compensate them in a monetary way that for the record is *incredibly* low for the sheer amount of value that is being copied?

That’s the delimemma that i want to paint this week. there are a number of these things that just feel wrong, but due to the protections that the law provides, it is perfectly legal and oftentime encouraged by capitalism to do. So the behavior becomes justified and left alone.

So value. Where does it come from? How is it recognized in this moment? Who is it taking from? How are they apart of this chain? Do they know or communicate with who they’re coping? The “recorded-music-part” of the music industries future will have to answer these questions. Is it fair? How could it change? Makes me want to work in rights management to really understand how these decisions are getting maid. So maybe a publisher, that new org that is going to disperse mechanicals really really interests me. So maybe I’ll work for them :)

Alright That’s all for now. Looking to meet more peopleIRL. People have their head in the game. Everyone who I’ve met does have their head in the game, but I can’t wait to meet more. Talk soon.

1 note · View note

earthnashes · 6 years

Text

Rock’n’Royal!AU Brainstorm 1: Roles

Alrighty so I still don’t quite have a name for the band but meh, I guess we’ll figure it out as we go! Wanna talk about some of the characters anyhow. C:

----------------------------

The Band: Goes by the name of Rock’n’Royal, I decided that the band that Twi leads is almost entirely indie, in which they don’t have a record label or anything of the sort and make their own way through the industry. Since starting, the band has reached a staggering amount of success and has been approached several times with the offer of a label, but those offers are ultimately turned down in favor of doing things their way. The genre of music they play is generally classified as “rock” or perhaps “alternative rock”, but the band is too experimental and collaborative for it to be stuck in one specific niche.

----------------------------

Twilight Sparkle: The cute dork who somehow managed to elevate herself into rock stardom, Twilight is the lead singer, guitarist, and what’s essentially the manager of the band. Twilight in this AU is far more confident in her abilities, sometimes to the point of being borderline cocky, but when she isn’t on stage she’s still the same bookworm who gets flustered at some of the sweetest gestures and will gladly talk your ear off about the newest scientific discovery: the fans eat it all up. She’s known as “The Princess” or “Your Highness” to her fans; not something she came up with, but she goes along with it.

Trixie Lulamoon: The loudmouth of the group and every bit the showoff, Trixie plays the keytar and is the secondary vocalist. She’s also the primary lyricist of the band: Twilight can sing and can write the general tune of the song, but when it comes to lyrics she’s... pretty bad. Given her talent for talking up hype, Trixie’s often in charge of promoting the band however she can, whether that be blogging about their tours or making posters or bragging: the band has skill, but if it weren’t for Trixie’s constant promoting and networking they wouldn’t be as well known as they currently are. Twi might be the leader, but Trixie’s often the one who is in the limelight and in front of cameras as the voice of the band (Twi’s still a bit camera shy). She’s referred to as “The Great and Powerful” by their fans. Yes, she is definitely the source of it.

Big Macintosh: The big, big, big boi of the group and the only stallion of the band, Big Mac provides his talents in the form of drumming. Sometimes the group does acapella, in which he provides the bass and even sometimes lead vocals. Mac rarely speaks and is known as the silent one of the group, but give him a pair of drum sticks and he’ll go wild. Like his sister, he can play one hell of a banjo. He’s often referred to as “The Gentle Knight” of the band: looming, silent, protective presence, there’s no real need for a bodyguard with him around.

Fluttershy: The newest member of the band, Fluttershy brings to the group her talent with the bass guitar, violin, and piano. Fluttershy’s known Twilight for most of her life and her inclusion into the band started when Twi asked Shy to play the violin for one of their tracks. The song went viral and, when it came time to feature it in a concert, Twi asked Fluttershy if she’d be willing to be the one to play her own part: it wouldn’t be the same if they got some random player to do it. She agreed, and despite her nervousness of being on stage, once she got to playing all of it momentarily disappears. The crowd ate it up and kept asking about the “quiet little fae” playing the violin, and it eventually escalated to Fluttershy becoming a part of the band officially. Nervousness aside, Shy does like the attention she gets but in small doses, so while she’s willing to play on stage she often opts out of interviews or, when she does go, she’s seen clinging to one of her bandmates (most often Twilight or Big Mac). She’s known to the fans as “The Fae” or “The Maiden”.

Applejack: Despite being best buds with Twi and the sister of Big Mac, AJ isn’t actually a part of the band. Well... at least officially. She often acts as the band’s tour-bus driver and, when Twi freaks out a bit, the band manager. She’s the one who helps keep everyone in line and focused on the task at hand, so I guess that makes her more of the manager than it does Twily (who mostly focuses on scheduling and making sure they make appointments on time). She may not be an official member but she has played with the band some, able to take up bass and one hell of a banjo and even vocals. As far as the fans are concerned, she’s as much a part of the band’s official lineup as anyone else. Known for her sincerity and honesty, she’s sometimes called “The Honest Knight” or the “Noble Mare”. There’s also, of course, “Country Beef”, of which both Apple siblings are referred to as. The fans love them some muscular Apple farmers.

Spike: Young roadie of the band and near constant companion to Twilight, Spike helps set up and tear down the equipment for the band’s shows and to keep the band on schedule. He’s resourceful and reliable and takes after Twi’s need to keep everything on schedule, but unlike Twi he’s able to roll with the punches more and, if something does go off schedule, figure out a way to remain on task on the fly. Spike also handles the mail the group gets, ranging from fanmail to inquiries to bills, so on. I’m also considering making him the band’s merch artist: I can see Spike being talented at art for his age and they allowed him to design some of their merch. Spikey works more behind the scenes but he gets his fair share of attention; Twi isn’t afraid to brag about him.

Rarity: Upcoming fashionista fresh out of college, Rarity’s the mare who has the skill and dedication to make it, now she just needs the chance. She runs her own online boutique that has been fairly successful, but she wants to aim higher, to work in the fashion industry and hopefully alongside some of her idols. When she lands an interview with one of the biggest name-brand boutiques in Equestria, she hits a creative block that lasts for weeks and leaves her stressed and nearly pulling her mane out. Rainbow brings her to a concert that helps her out of that block, but when the interview ends badly thanks to some stuffy stuck up unwilling to give her a chance, she finds her start in a way she didn’t anticipate: she becomes Twi’s band’s costume designer for their upcoming tour.

Rainbow Dash: An aspiring athlete pursuing a career in professional sports (and to join her dream team, The Wonderbolts), Dash is Rarity’s roommate and best friend since childhood. She works at a weather factory to make ends meet but trains and practices as often as she can to keep in tip-top shape in hopes of scoring a place on the Wonderbolt’s armature team the next coming annual tryout session. She also has a surprisingly entrenched grasp on painting, so much so that she has a decent online following for her work and even offers commissions as a sort of side-hustle for some extra cash. RD is supportive of Rarity’s endeavors into her career (and vice versa) and often acts as a creative buff for Rarity, helping her out when the stress gets to be too much. Her latest success of pulling Rarebear out of a funk is bringing her to her favorite indie band, but she didn’t exactly expect it to go the way it did! That’s alright though: that just equates to a road trip, so of course she tags along.

Pinkie Pie: Works at the bakery Rarity and Rainbow frequent, Pinkie’s as sweet and as excitable as she always has been. She’s known the pair for about 4 years now, providing cupcakes and coffee all throughout college, and they’ve been good friends ever since with the bakery being the unofficial “hangout spot” for them. When Rarity snags the job as the band’s costume designer and asks if Rainbow and Pinkie want to come, Pinkie is almost forced to go by Donut Joe; of the four years she’s worked for him, not once has she taken any vacation days and it’s about time she takes some time away from work. I’m thinking in this AU Pinkie might be a bit of a workaholic, if only because she might be one of the main sources of income for her family ever since her father fell ill. This is subject to change but we’ll see.

---------------------------

Celestia: A retired music icon who has taken up politics and opened up her own school, Celestia was once known (and still is) as the Queen of Rock. Celestia’s school is well known for their stellar Magi-science program and their arts program (including music), and while she no longer personally teaches there she still does visit the school often and offers workshops and mentoring. She is one of the sources of Twilight’s desire to become a rockstar, the others being Shining Armor (who had his own indie band before ultimately disbanding for the military) and Luna. She doesn’t have any official say in what the band does, but she is a source of advice and wisdom who’s willing to offer a tip or two to help the band succeed.

Luna: Retired music icon who’s settled more into the musical world than Celestia has, Luna was once (and still is) hailed as one of the best drummers in Equestria. She and Celestia were a trio-band with Discord back in their hay-day, with Celly as the vocalist and guitarist, Luna as the drummer and songwriter, and Discord as bass guitarist. While both have ultimately stepped away from the limelight, Luna found her own calling in being a professional songwriter and lyricist. Like Celestia, Luna holds workshops and mentorship programs at Celly’s school. Whereas Twilight became Celestia’s star pupil, Trixie became Luna’s, and the two’s friendship and eventual collaboration into a band was born out of a friendly rivalry from it.

Discord: Retired music icon who has found his calling in musical management, Discord was once part of Celly and Lulu’s band (called LCD). He was primarily the bass guitarist but he’s well-known for being able to play almost any instrument in existence. No one really knows how he managed that, but there ya go: due to his talent he’s often hailed as the “Lord of music”. When the band ultimately disbanded in favor of retirement and pursuing their own careers in other areas, Discord remained interested in having some part in a band and, surprisingly, became a professional band manager and head of his own record label company. Given how spontaneous and chaotic he is, one would think this wouldn’t really work in the music industry... but to everyone’s surprise, it has. He isn’t quite mentor material like Luna and Celestia, but his own methods of teaching and guiding seem to have an overall positive effect, even if sometimes there’s controversy when he’s near.

------------------------------------------------

Apple Bloom: The youngest member of the esteemed Apple family, AB is just as enthusiastic about music as she is apple bucking. More over, she’s far more interested in how the technology of music works than actually playing it, though she has quite the soft spot for the banjo and its simplicity (thanks to her older siblings). Apple Bloom often is made to stay home with Granny Smith when her older sibs strike out on tour, but this time she really, really wants to go. And by george she’s gonna make it happen!

Sweetie Belle: The young sister of Rarity with an affinity for music, Sweetie Belle swears that one day she’ll be a rockstar. She got hooked onto this notion after seeing a Rock’n’Royal concert on TV, and she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the lead singer as she shred on the guitar, or the very pretty blue mare playing some sort of piano-like guitar and flipping her mane like it was an art. And in that moment, Sweetie knew exactly what she wanted to be when she grew up. In this AU I’m thinking Rarity’s parents are a bit more... neglectful, than they actually are in canon (or in my headcanon), so Sweetie lives with Rarity. That means wherever Rarebear goes, Sweetie goes, and because of it she’ll soon get to meet a couple of kids who’ll become her bestest friends.

Scootaloo: Young little spitfire who’s actually related to Rainbow Dash in this AU: they’re cousins! Scootaloo looks up to big cuz’ RD and mimics just about anything she does, and that includes listening to the music she’s into. Scoots is admittedly not that big of a fan of Rock’n’Royal, if only because their music isn’t exactly “punk” enough for her, but she likes their music well enough and she has to admit, they all look super cool. And hey, RD likes them a lot, so clearly there has to be something great about them, yeah? Fan or nah, she’ll get a surprise of her life when Rainbow Dash invites little cuzo on a long road-trip with her and her friends.... with the freakin’ band themselves. And of course she’s gonna go... if her moms say yes, of course.

#Rock'n'Royal!AU #RnR!AU #au

95 notes · View notes

nyrator · 3 years

Text

merry christmas

random anxiety-depressionly rambles included

not sure what to say but yeah

just very anxious lately

local friends had a gift exchange on the 22nd/23rd which was nice, got a Nichijou manga and an Isabelle head plush

most mail gifts have been in delivery limbo unfortunately- neither of the gifts I got for Kresna arrived, nor did his gift for me (though he did also order me a weighted blanket / tidying manga / stronger vitamin d which was nice and arrived before christmas), most haven’t updated their status since two weeks ago, we’ll see if things speed up now that Christmas is over

bought myself that “My Boy” manga, Lily Chou-Chou blu ray, some personal things that honestly kind of impress me compared to others of their kind, and a water filter pitcher thing since I drink so much tap water, I figured I’d try one. Probably other things I’m forgetting as well, also some steam games like EDF 4.1. Bought the cats a new easier-to-clean litter box, but it got sent back and resent, or something, so still hasn’t arrived. Been wanting to buy a new computer desk, but can’t find one I like for sale, though I’ve seen a few images of the desk I’m looking for online a few times, so I know something like it exists (basically a hutch with shelves on both sides and along the top). Maybe an L desk would be nice, debating getting one with a keyboard tray attached or to try out one of those fancier new keyboard trays that clamp on

spoke briefly with my old coworker about things, sounds like she decorated a few houses this year, might want my help talking the decorations down in January (it’s $50 an hour and it’s something to do), we’ll see

didn’t spend time with the family- my uncle helped one of his tenants to the hospital, and after arriving at the hospital, they found out this tenant has covid, so now my uncle’s in quarantine just in case, so just spent the time at home.

otherwise just played EDF 4.1 with online friends/Kresna for the holidays, along with some Rollercoaster Tycoon 2 and some L4D2 (we also had a movie night tonight, between Die Hard and Kung Pow Enter the Fist, the latter won. To be fair I already seen Die Hard and did not see Kung Pow, was entertaining)

decided to let my cats back into my room as well for christmas as a gift to them, they’ve been good and my allergies haven’t been awful so that’s good

haven’t really done much else in my time to myself, mostly just distracting myself with groups of people

got my sleep schedule fixed when I went to the dentist on Monday, but it fell apart in time for christmas once the depression hit full force, back to staying up until 5am and sleeping until 4pm

haven’t showered in a while and feel disgusting, the floors are also disgusting in my apartment from one of the cats throwing up a lot and me slacking on cleaning it. Can’t remember last time I did laundry. Room’s cleaned up, but feel no relief from it, just seeing it already start to fall apart again bit by bit

I haven’t even attempted to even try to think of anything creative. There’s only painful anxiety awaiting me if I even attempt to, so I just don’t bother to try.

still debating posting my 2020 dream diary, too self conscious about how embarrassing my dreams are, not sure what to do about it

My life is essentially sleep 10+ hours, feel like having a mental breakdown until I get up, breakfast around 3pm-4pm, internet, back to bed once the mental breakdown feelings hit full force, lunch around 7pm-8pm, turn head off and hang out in a voice chat with internet friends and play some games, make dinner around 11pm-1am, end the call around 3AM, and then just play picross or something to avoid being in my own thoughts until I feel too depressed to even stay awake any longer

not gonna lie, definitely one of the weaker christmases in recent memory. Maybe the worst if not for casual hangouts with friends. Just a completely normal day, I guess, which lately, haven’t been great at all.

I don’t know how I’ll ever escape this depression, I don’t feel like I’m living at all and am barely functional, it’s like I can’t think for myself at all anymore, or maybe I just don’t want to think at all anymore. I just don’t know what to do anymore.

#text stuffs #nyrants

0 notes

sheminecrafts · 4 years

Text

Under quarantine, media is actually social

The flood of status symbol content into Instagram Stories has run dry. No one is going out and doing anything cool right now, and if they are, they should be shamed for it. Beyond sharing video chat happy hour screenshots and quarantine dinner concoctions, our piece-by-piece biographies have ground to a halt. Oddly, what remains feels more social than social networks have in a long time.

With no source material, we’re doing it live. Coronavirus has absolved our desire to share the recent past. The drab days stuck inside blur into each other. The near future is so uncertain that there’s little impetus to make plans. Why schedule an event or get excited for a trip just to get your heartbroken if shelter-in-place orders are extended? We’re left firmly fixed in the present.

A house-arrest Houseparty, via StoicLeys

What is social media when there’s nothing to brag about? Many of us are discovering it’s a lot more fun. We had turned social media into a sport but spent the whole time staring at the scoreboard rather than embracing the joy of play.

But thankfully, there are no Like counts on Zoom .

Nothing permanent remains. That’s freed us from the external validation that too often rules our decision making. It’s stopped being about how this looks and started being about how this feels. Does it put me at peace, make me laugh, or abate the loneliness? Then do it. There’s no more FOMO because there’s nothing to miss by staying home to read, take a bath, or play board games. You do you.

Being social animals, what feels most natural is to connect. Not asynchronously through feeds of what we just did. But by coexisting concurrently. Professional enterprise technology for agenda-driven video calls has been subverted for meandering, motive-less togetherness. We’re doing what many of us spent our childhoods doing in basements and parking lots: just hanging out.

For evidence, just look at group video chat app Houseparty, where teens aimlessly chill with everyone’s face on screen at once. In Italy, which has tragically been on lock down since COVID-19’s rapid spread in the country, Houseparty wasn’t even in the top 1500 apps a month ago. Today it’s the #1 social app, and the #2 app overall second only to Zoom which is topping the charts in tons of countries.

Houseparty rockets to #1 in many countries

Houseparty topped all the charts on Monday, when Sensor Tower tells TechCrunch the app’s download rate was 323X higher than its average in February. As of yesterday it was #1 in Portugal (up 371X) and Spain (up 592X), as well as Peru, Argentina, Chile, Austria, Belgium, and the U.K. I despite being absent from the chart a week earlier. Apptopia tells me Houseparty saw 25 downloads in Spain on March 1st and 40,000 yesterday.

A year ago Houseparty was nearly dead, languishing at #245 on the US charts before being acquired by Fortnite-maker Epic in June. Our sudden need for unmediated connection has brought it roaring back to life.

Around the world, apps for direct connection are spiking. Google Hangouts rules in Sweden. Discord for chat while gaming is #1 in France. Slack clone Microsoft Teams is king in the Netherlands. After binging through Netflix, all that’s left to entertain us is each other.

Undivided By Geography

If we’re all stuck at home, it doesn’t matter where that home is. We’ve been released from the confines of which friends are within a 20 minute drive or hour-long train. Just like students are saying they all go to Zoom University since every school’s classes moved online, we all now live in Zoom Town. All commutes have been reduced to how long it takes to generate an invite URL.

Nestled in San Francisco, even pals across the Bay in Berkeley felt far away before. But this week I had hour-long video calls with my favorite people who typically feel out of reach in Chicago and New York. I spent time with babies I hadn’t met in person. And I kept in closer touch with my parents on the other coast, which is more vital and urgent than ever before.

Playing board game Codenames over Zoom with friends in New York and North Carolina

Typically, our time is occupied by acquaintances of circumstance. The co-workers who share our office. The friends who happen to live in the neighborhood. But now we’re each building a virtual family completely of our choosing. The calculus has shifted from who is convenient or who invites us to the most exciting place, to who makes us feel most human.

Even celebrities are getting into it. Rather than pristine portraits and flashy music videos, they’re appearing raw, with crappy lighting, on Facebook and Instagram Live. John Legend played piano for 100,000 people while his wife Chrissy Teigen sat on screen in a towel looking salty like she’s heard “All Of Me” far too many times. That’s more authentic than anything you’ll get on TV.

And without the traditional norms of who we are and aren’t supposed to call, there’s an opportunity to contact those we cared about in a different moment of our lives. The old college roommate, the high school buddy, the mentor who gave you you’re shot. If we have the emotional capacity in these trying times, there’s good to be done. Who do you know who’s single, lives alone, or resides in a city without a dense support network?

Reforging those connections not only surfaces prized memories we may have forgotten, but could help keep someone sane. For those who relied on work and play for social interaction, shelter-in-place is essentially solitary confinement. There’s a looming mental health crisis if we don’t check in on the isolated.

The crisis language of memes

It can be hard to muster the energy to seize these connections, though. We’re all drenched in angst about the health impacts of the virus and financial impacts of the response. I certainly spent a few mornings sleeping in just to make the days feel shorter. When all small talk leads to rehashing our fears, sometimes you don’t have anything to say.

Luckily we don’t have to say anything to communicate. We can share memes instead.

The internet’s response to COVID-19 has been an international outpour of gallow’s humor. From group chats to Instagram joke accounts to Reddit threads to Facebook groups like quarter-million member “Zoom Memes For Quaranteens”, we’re joining up to weather the crisis.

A nervous laugh is better than no laugh at all. Memes allow us to convert our creeping dread and stir craziness into something borderline productive. We can assume an anonymous voice, resharing what some unspecified other made without the vulnerability of self-attribution. We can dive into the creation of memes ourselves, killing time under house arrest in hopes of generating smiles for our generation. And with the feeds and Stories emptied, consuming memes offers a new medium of solidarity. We’re all in this hellscape together so we may as well make fun of it.

The web’s mental immune system has kicked into gear amidst the outbreak. Rather than wallowing in captivity, we’ve developed digital antibodies that are evolving to fight the solitude. We’re spicing up video chats with board games like Codenames. One-off livestreams have turned into wholly online music festivals to bring the sounds of New Orleans or Berlin to the world. Trolls and pranksters are finding ways to get their lulz too, Zoombombing webinars. And after a half-decade of techlash, our industry’s leaders are launching peer-to-peer social safety nets and ways to help small businesses survive until we can be patrons in person again.

Rather than scrounging for experiences to share, we’re inventing them from scratch with the only thing we’re left with us in quarantine: ourselves. When the infection waves pass, I hope this swell of creativity and in-the-moment togetherness stays strong. The best part of the internet isn’t showing off, it’s showing up.

from iraidajzsmmwtv https://ift.tt/3adk5vy via IFTTT

#IFTTT #iraidajzsmmwtv

0 notes

sheminecrafts · 4 years

Text

Under quarantine, media is actually social

A house-arrest Houseparty, via StoicLeys

But thankfully, there are no Like counts on Zoom .

Houseparty topped all the charts on Monday, when Sensor Tower tells TechCrunch the app’s download rate was 323X higher than its average in February. It’s currently #1 in Portugal (up 371X) and Spain (up 592X) despite being absent from the chart a week earlier. Apptopia tells me Houseparty saw 25 downloads in Spain on March 1st and 40,000 yesterday. A year ago Houseparty was nearly dead, languishing at #245 on the US charts before being acquired by Fortnite-maker Epic in June. Our sudden need for unmediated connection has brought it roaring back to life.

Undivided By Geography

Playing board game Codenames over Zoom with friends in New York and North Carolina

The crisis language of memes

Luckily we don’t have to say anything to communicate. We can share memes instead.

from iraidajzsmmwtv https://ift.tt/2Uqwx4x via IFTTT

#IFTTT #iraidajzsmmwtv

0 notes