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faustonastring · 4 years

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How would the main six react the the mc wanting to start a family?

Thanks for requesting I hope you like it!

My request are open!

Main six reacting to Mc wanting to start a family!

Psa! Please read before reading!

Heheh hi, so I’m like halfway through writing this and I just want to say, that there are two voices that go into wanting to start a family, just because you want too, doesn’t mean your partner may want to (atleast at the moment) I pride myself on writing the main six as accurately as I can, so I’m keeping this in mind while writing it, they still will all follow the prompt, but I’m also writing the bumps in the road that happen along the way (hopefully this makes more sense when you read it) also like half of them have some sort of childhood trauma sooo... read with an open mind.

Asra

Are you being serious? Like really serious? This is t a prank is it? If it is he’ll cry. Don’t make asra cry. Tell him your being serious. Tell him you want to start a family with him. It makes his heart flutter everytime.

He’s waited years for you to tell him this. Decades even, (depending on your time line) and yet your here. Asking him to start a family. He never thought he’d get the chance. He never thought he’d ever get the chance... but I guess all his hard work is really paying off huh.

I mention this a lot, but Asra has a lot of trauma. It doesn’t just go away when you both say I love you, or get married, or decide you want a kid. Sure it gets better over time, but it will probably take atleast a decade for those wounds to fully heal (and that’s being generous) so, as excited as asra is to want to start a family with you, if it’s too early in your relationship, he might have to decline for now. Ask him again in a year or two.

But if you do manage to get Asra ‘Commitment issues’ Alnazar to agree, he want to do it right. He wants his kid to have a better childhood than he had, so he obviously goes to his parents for help. Often. They obviously don’t mind though, they are thrilled to be having a grandchild. (also if your going to adopt, asras gets very sentimental, and wants to adopt all the kids, in the orphanage (let’s say Nadia builds one after the uprights-) and leaves crying, everytime.)

Nadia

Are you sure? You do know how much time and effort you need for kids right? Don’t worry about the money though, the money isn’t the problem, the problem is: is she going to have time in her schedule to raise one or more kid(s)

I mean her parents did it what? Seven times??? And they were ruling over a whole country weren’t they? How hard can it be???? She’ll be fine. Yep. There is nothing to worry about, she’s decided. As long as your on board for it, she’ll make room for as much time as you need. Besides, it’s much easier to rule with you with her.

She has books on top of books, on top of books on how to be a good mother. I mean she had a good mother, and great sisters sure- but she doesn’t want to mess this up for you. She knows how much it means to you, and besides, being a good mother is much more difficult than being a good ruler. Any one can rule, but only a select few can properly raise a kid.

As soon as her family finds out that your planing on starting a family, they book it to vesuvia to give the both of you all the support and tips you need. And when the kid does get here, they always find it hard to part ways. It’s been a while since a new Satrinava has entered this world. Also having her family near reminds Nadia that she doesn’t need books to be a good mom. You’re here with her the both of you are going to do fine. Hopefully.

Julian

He thinks you’re joking at first. Him? Really??? Bold of you to assume that a no good drunk like him would make a good father. Am I right? It’s not like he’s canonically great with kids, helped raise his baby sister and protected her from a shipwreck, or anything. Hahaha. You my friend. Are very bold.

Julian needs a moment or two to think things over, it’s nothing against you, no no no it’s not that! You’re his love! His light! His one and only! His darling! He’d never mean to offended you! He just needs to think it over, figure out if this is the right time to start something this big. If he’s in the right mental state for it. If he’s not? He’ll let you know when he is.

But if he is ready? Ohhohoho buckle up baby because you got a long journey ahead of you! He’s reading up on child development, digging up old notes he has from the very few times he’s had child patients (he’s also researching more about pregnancy, if you can and want to go down that road with him...but I wouldn’t let him deliver the baby if I were you....if you asked him he’d probably reluctantly do so....but...it’s probably best if you leave that to a professional)

Mazelinka and Portia give you and Julian are the best recipes they can find, and Portia will knit or sew, or crochet, he’ll maybe all three- little toys for your kid when the time gets closer. They will one hundred percent be on board with this, and volunteer to baby sit everytime the two of you need some alone time

Portia

Yes. She doesn’t need to think to long or hard about it. The answer is yes. One million times yes! Yes, yes yes yes yes yes! She is over joyed to be honest! She is also going to be a great mom.

As long as the time is right, and you are alright, everything is going to be alright! Every thing is going to be great! She’s going to be a great mom....right? She’s never really had a mom....well she’s had grandmas that counts right? What if she isn’t a good mom? What if she screws something up? Or her kid hates her? What if they like her brother more than her? (*looks at camera like in an episode of the office*)

Tell her you believe in her. That she’s going to be a great mom! That you’ll be there to help her. Portia has a lot of insecurities and self doubt, so it really means a lot to her. And as soon as she’s mentally prepared- everyone and their mother knows about your plans.....”sorry! It just kind of slipped out....and then people started telling their friends and families...and...uhhhhh”

Julian would not only be a good dad, but a pretty decent uncle too! (Also again, if your pregnant...he gives you his card ;)....but not only for your safety but for your babies safety please throw it away, he’s not professionally trained to deliver-) While your waiting for things to get settled, get ready to hear an ear full of stories from when Portia and Julian were kids!

Muriel

Him? When you first ask him he actually does a double take and looks around to make sure you were asking him. But who else would you ask? The chickens? He just doesn’t see why you would want to do that with....him. Him of all people. You chose him.

He isn’t sure what to say at first, he’s going to need about three to five buissnes days to think it over. No matter how much he wants this....he just isn’t sure. It has nothing to do with you really. He tries to make that as clear as possible but...can he trust him self with a kid? Obviously you trust him, and you know he won’t do anything, but this isn’t about what you think. He needs to figure it out on his own.

In three to five business days, if he says no....ask again in maybe a year or two. ( I know it’s long but you’ll have a higher chance of him saying yes if you wait longer, you can’t push things onto him, that never works.) but if he says yes? Well he doesn’t. You’ll catch him whittling things like toys, or a crib, or a bed, and if you ask what it’s for, he’ll say “for our kid/baby” Our.

He asks asra like a million questions, he gets books, and starts going out into town more to get the softest blankets and clothes. He grew up thinking he was a burden. A waste of space. He grew up thinking he was t alowed to have nice things. He doesn’t want his kid to ever go through that. His kid is going to grow up in the most loving and safe house any one can grow up in. I swear by it.

Lucio

What do you mean by start a family? Like adopt more pets.....or.....the other kind of family. Oh you mean the other kind? Like the human, fleshy kind? Are you sure? Kids are so gross aren’t they? They cry and throw up and you have to take care of them for soooo long-

Look, lucio is a very.....complex..character. I don’t think he’s totally evil but he does have a lot of problems that would take a lot of time to go through before I think he’s mentally prepared to have a kid. What’s intresting about lucio is that he has a lot of layers to him. Like ogres. Which makes him very difficult to write, especially when I don’t know where we’ll end up at the end of his route so- I’m sorry lucio stans, but unless you’ve been together for like 20-30 years...

this is just how I headcanon it, other people I know will disagree and say he’d love to have a mini him running around which is valid.... but...I think he’d be scared to have a mini him running around, because of how bad he turned out, and he wouldn’t want to raise his kid like how morga raised him, but we tend to follow in are parents footsteps when raising a kid, wether we like it or not, so...

I’m sorry this is more of a meta than a headcanon I just don’t really know how to write it....lucio would be against it. He isn’t ready. Not ready for the responsibility, not ready to take the risk of the mistakes his kid is going to make. Once he cleans up all his oopsies, and quite possibly gets on good terms with his mother, then maybe just maybe you’ll have a standing chance, besides... he does want an heir ya’know (but if the two of you make an oopsie together and you want to keep it, go ahead. He needs to start taking more responsibility when it comes to his mistakes, so what a great place to start! besides who would he be to tell you what to do with your body.)

Thanks for reading! I can redo Lucios if some one wants... I really just need ideas because it’s too early In his route to really be able to tell how he handles it, so I’d love to hear your opinions on it!

Next headcanon: main six reacting to Mc’s sleepy voice! (5/23)

Request are open!!!!!

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ashflynns · 4 years

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☄〔 HUNTER SCHAFER, TWENTY ONE, TRANS FEMALE, DREAM TRAVEL 〕╰ ASHLEY FLYNN just came over half - blood hill . you know , the child of HYPNOS who was claimed two months ago ? i’ve heard chiron say that she is PLAYFUL & EMPATHETIC , but if you ask the aphrodite kids , they’d say she’s LAZY & TACTLESS . i’d say they remind me of sleepy smiles and under-eye bags, messy buns and an unmade bed, running from your problems with bare feet & trying to hard to keep your friends but losing them anyway, especially since she’s FOR THE NEW CABINS . ( ✎ joey , 24 , she/her , bst . )

*insert nice graphic here aka for the love of god someone find me a photoshop link*

hi! its your resident sea witch joey here ready to bombard you with an encyclopedic knowledge of the greek pantheon and uk criminal law?? i guess??? if u dont already know, i’m the one with six (6) cats. i combined my task and intro because im LAZY and bad at intros so i’ll use paige’s stats as a crutch whoops. ash is the lazy laid-back stoner friend everyone needs. she has no trauma because she DOESN’t DESERVE IT so maybe the real trauma will be the friends we make along the way.

𝕓𝕒𝕤𝕚𝕔𝕤 .

name : ashley finn

nicknames : ash, whatever cute names u wanna give her

birth date : 4th february (aquarius squad speak up!)

gender : trans female

pronouns : she/her

ethnicity : white

nationality : irish american

hometown : ?? idk american towns SUE ME but she’s from SOMEWHERE in oregon

demigod abilities : sleep manipulation, dream manipulation, dream travel

cabin number & godly parent : cabin fifteen, hypnos

how did their godly parent meet their mortal parent? : hlhglkhg so i thought it’d be funny if they met when ash’s mum participated in a sleep research study. i think i’m hilarious.

𝕞𝕦𝕤𝕖 𝕒𝕡𝕡𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕖 .

faceclaim : hunter schafer

height : 5′11″

hair colour : blonde

eye colour : blue/green.

dominant hand : leftie!

distinguishing features : her hair’s actually super curly she just straightens it a lot bc curly bedhead is a bitch to brush through in the mornings.

dress style : ugh this is gonna be hard to explain but like. you know those alt hippy stoner girls?? like that. likes baggy clothes and neutral colours. a lot of quote unquote ugly clothes with clashing prints. band t-shirts and whatnot.

𝕔𝕒𝕞𝕡-𝕣𝕖𝕝𝕒𝕥𝕖𝕕 .

go - to weapon : HAH implying she willingly participates in capture the flag. she’d go for a xiphos because it’s the most basic dfkjg

ambrosia : garlic bread. yeah she’s that kind of bitch

favourite camp location : zephyros creek!

their opinion of their godly parent : really unbothered tbqh. but she’s a very laid-back person to begin with. a ton of her school friends had absent dads. if she hadn’t come to chb so early then maybe the whole ‘i have powers with no explanation’ would’ve caused some resentment but hey, he’s a god. he’s a busy man. and being raised by a single mum made up most of who ash is, so it’s not like she’d change anything.

age they were claimed : this year baby!

how they were claimed : look dad’s timing was off but as far as he was concerned he claimed ash when percy made the deal. ash kinda always knew it was gonna be him so it was no surprise.

stance on the new cabins : for the new cabins.

their opinion on lyssa pentelute : as far as ash is concerned, lyssa’s whole shtick is just an excuse to shit on the kids who don’t have to suffer the same way she did. so, uh, she’s kind of a bitch? i have this in a bit more detail down below.

quests : i’m gonna tentatively put no for now (unless anyone else on quests decides they’d like to have dragged ash along!)

𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕠𝕟𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪 .

positive traits : playful, empathetic, laid-back, friendly but not a pushover, patient

negative traits : lazy, tactless, aloof, spacey, struggles to express said empathy, lack of focus

mbti : Iinfp-t, the mediator

alignment : neutral good

hogwarts house : hufflepuff

kinsey scale : JUST ASK IF SHES A LESBIAN OKAY?? THE ANSWER IS YES.

archetype : somehow she matched equally with the innocent child and the wise old man *insert so what is the truth meme*

what candle scent are they : vanilla

goals & desires : well this one was tricky bc ash is a simple girl with simple needs and really just doesn’t want anything to change. she wants a life without the pressures of work and commitment, but that’s just not gonna happen, is it? her short-term goals are to practice fighting that urge to stay in bed all day and try to be a bit more productive. it’s not going well.

fears : explained more below but basically she has a fear of destroying all her relationships due to a lack of connect with the world

hobbies : when she’s not napping? probably gaming, going on nature walks, baking treats.

habits : biting nails is the worst one. spacing out. you know that thing where you just?? stop focusing your eyes?? but you’re still tuned in to the conversation? that.

𝕙𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪 .

so hear’s the short version kfjglkdfgjd ( for NOW ):

ashley’s mum, niamh, is third-gen irish immigrant. ash didn’t have a luxurious life or anything. they mostly lived off benefits or whatever niamh could pick up from her extremely lucrative dog-walking business. how she met hypnos was a literal joke. they met when she participated in a fucking sleep study and i guess they hit it off. typical story of dad fucks off/single parent yadda yadda. there’s no real ~~trauma~~ to ash. yeah, transphobia sucks and high school really sucked all but her mum’s been super supportive since she first came out and no one at chb has given her shit yet. niamh’s still around and ash goes back home every couple of months to visit her. they have a pretty good relationship. it’s all cool.

i feel cliche saying she was a ‘dreamy’ girl but dreamy or spacey really is the best word for it. mixed with your typical demigod adhd you get a kid who really struggled with school. well, it’s not like she struggled - ashley’s a smart gal - but the teacher’s struggled with her. i guess it was hard for them to understand that ash actually does her best thinking when she’s asleep.

struggles to keep friends - maintains a persona of aloofness and apathy but actually cares way too much. the narcolepsy hinders her ability to form proper connections ( although she’ll argue the sCiEnTiFiCaLlY pRoVeN fAcT that napping with someone for half an hour does more to build trust than anything else ). and no one’s really that fond of ash popping into their dreams. maybe they shouldnt have so much to hide, huh?

her biggest ‘’’ inner struggle ’’’ shall we say is the pressure to be productive. let’s face it, she IS a lazy bitch, and that’s pretty much an inherited nature. getting a job sounds like hell, she sucks at combat training, she really could NOT be bothered with camp politics and god wars and whatever else. why can’t she just sleep and dream walk all day? monster’s are out there man, she’s gonna die some point soon anyway. but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t feel guilty about it all. it’s kinda hard not to.

so, moving on to the ISSUE AT HAND. so when you walk through dreams and you sleep for 20 hours of the day, it’s not hard to figure out who your dad is, even if he never turns up. like, seriously, who else would it be? so yeah, sure. she was only claimed a couple of months ago. but she wasn’t completely in the dark like some of her other campers, and she respects that, truly. she got the luckier end of the stick and its not hard to understand the resentment among the minor demigods and the unclaimed.

HOWEVER, she’s very much FOR the new cabins. as explained above, lyssa’s a bitch whose taking her mummy issues out on others. ash loves bunking with the hermes kids but she’d like a space of her own and at the end of the day who the fuck is lyssa to make that decision?

𝕖𝕩𝕥𝕣𝕒 .

pinterest! (its a wip there’s not much IM SORRY)

spotify (now this is the one thing i will never let u down on)

wanted connections coming soon!

#ambrosia:intro #ambrosia:task #*will smith presenting wife pose*

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thelastarchangelaskblog · 5 years

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Session 9

This session was another dungeon crawler! We also hit level 4 by the end! A lot happened; it was also a very giggly session as we kept breaking out of character to laugh.

All of us were in attendance, and we have lots of highlights.

(Read more.)

We open up immediately after Tony (me) has had the dream, and DJ (doxblogsstuff) and Zira ( @heliocentricgeometric) are first up and chatting about breakfast. DJ would like to apologize to Tony for what happened the other day.

DJ: I was gonna try to apologize by making him breakfast.

Zira: doubt.jpg

Zira is not at all certain about DJ doing anything cooking-related, even though DJ insists he knows how to cut things up.

DJ: I'll have you know my professor told me I had the best prepared, and best cut ingredients of anyone in the class.

Zira: Of what, though?

DJ’s talents lie in alchemy, and Zira is very aware of this.

Zira: You are very good at exploding things, and I fear this talent will extend to everything you do.

DJ: I want to make breakfast, Zira! How hard can it be to make toast?

very hard

DJ does eventually do the toast thing.

Dox: DJ gets his bread out.

@the-grey-hunt as DM: Roll for toast.

Dox rolls pretty high, so DJ’s first attempts at making toast go well!

DM: DJ did just make toast perfectly competently in front of you.

Helio: Yeah, but Zira's still pressing X to doubt.

Dox: I can't believe I wasted my Nat 20 on toast.

Dox makes some more toast for everyone else but one of them is pretty charcoaled and that goes to Bob ( @thechaoticwave) since he can’t smell or taste.

Helio: Zira isn’t laughing in DJ’s face, but the energy is there.

Rhodey ( @rebaobsessions) gets a rather burnt piece as well but it’s Tony who gets a good piece because DJ’s feeling apologetic.

DJ to Tony: I made toast and didn’t even burn it!

Tony’s still reeling from the dream and the leather glove Bob threw at his head this morning.

Tony: Then why does Rhodey’s bread look rather burnt?

DJ asks for privacy from Zira so he can talk to Tony.

Zira: Have fun! Don't commit any murder!

DJ and Tony have a pretty heartfelt conversation as DJ apologizes for what happened yesterday. Tony’s a little uncertain about the apology because he did deserve it but DJ’s insistent.

They tie it up with talking about their upcoming mission.

DJ: Now we're gonna go and try not to get killed by a bunch of bugbears. This is gonna suck.

DJ then rushes off to make toast for Clint but doesn’t roll very well.

DJ, handing toast to Clint: If it makes you feel better, Bob's was worse.

Clint: It doesn’t.

Tony has a talk with Rhodey about some suspicious stuff Bob did.

Tony: Hey, uh, Rhodey...have you...uh...noticed anything...odd about Bob?

Rhodey probably internally: what the fuck isn’t odd about Bob

Rhodey: Odd?

Tony: (says something buckwild about Bob seeing things that aren’t there)

Rhodey: ...huh.

Rhodey does agree to keep an eye on things with Tony.

Rhodey: What's Bob's name today?

Tony: I have no fucking idea. I'm just calling him Bob.

Rhodey: So, you haven't asked yet. Good to know.

Tony’s a little sad since he had a good nickname for Bob the previous day.

Tony: What do you think he'd do if I call him Riff-Raff?

Rhodey: I have no idea.

Tony turns around.

Tony: Hey, Riff-Raff!

Bob doesn't respond.

Tony: Well, that answers that.

Reba in the lurking chat: Rhodey stares doubtfully at Tony’s back

We head to Cragmaw Castle! Clint volunteers to sneak.

Zira: That is horrifically structurally unsound. Good luck.

DM: Clint's character in a nutshell: dirty 20 followed immediately by a nat 1

We all have red cloaks from the Redbrands and we make sure we’re ready to go in.

DM to Bob: Your beak is still visible; there's not a lot you can do to hide that.

@imagine1117: Look down.

We’re all dressed to go bluff our way through the castle!

Zira: Tony, you are very good at bullshit. I think you should go first.

thanks for putting me on the spot, helio

Tony does manage to bluff their way past the guards by saying they scrammed from Briarbane because things went south. They gain access to the castle.

We (Tony & Zira) have a chat with a goblin sentry where Zira is critiquing their structurally unsound choice of a hideout.

Zira: This is absolutely terribly unsafe.

Goblin: What - do you want to go build something?

Tony: This is absolutely awesome and has great atmosphere.

Goblin: See - this guy gets it!

Tony says goodbye by telling him to have fun guarding. We’re then left to our own ends to find the boss who won’t be pleased with us having left Briarbane.

Zira: I assume the boss is behind the trap, because they're usually cowards.

We get further into the castle and there’s an area hidden behind a curtain. Tony suggests investigating and Rhodey and Bob take him up on it.

Reba: I roll 14 for stealth.

DM: Okay! (dice clattering on table)

There’s a monster that drops from the ceiling!

imagine: Is [the grick] slimy?

DM: Sure.

The grick goes down in no time.

DJ: Hey. Hey, you! (launches Magic Missile) Bitch.

Bob notices some people behind the curtain. Luna and then Rhodey both go to investigate. Rhodey notices a goblin’s foot behind the altar in the room.

DM: I forgot to roll initiative for some people.

Me: WHICH PEOPLE

DM: Don't worry about it.

imagine: We're worrying!

Me: Of course we're going to worry!

A goblin springs out from behind the altar and tries to attack Rhodey. It misses. DJ then attempted to whack the goblin with his quarterstaff but misses. Tony ran in and then shouted at the goblin to stop attacking because they were allies.

DM: For the record, because of how rounds work, Tony ran in and asked why they were fighting you guys simultaneously as DJ tried to hit him with his quarterstaff.

Helio: So Zira slips over to the doorway to the room, and sees Mom trying to commit murder, Dad attempting to soothe hurt feelings, and her brother doing whatever the fuck he’s doing.

Dox: Also trying to commit murder!

Bob unsuccessfully tries to set the goblin on fire.

There’s another goblin that springs out and this one looks more like a priest and notices our red cloaks and demands an explanation. Tony bullshits one about being from Briarbane.

DM (to me): Roll deception. He's going to roll competing insight - natural one. Don't even bother. He believes you instantly.

Rhodey “intimidates” the first goblin into giving up his weapon. It’s “intimidates” because he rolled a 21 and the goblin got a nat 20 so the goblin grudgingly handed over his scimitar because he was in the wrong.

Reba: I'm trying to get Rhodey to accumulate odd weapons.

We get out of the religious goblins’ way and Tony tells the first goblin to look before he attacks next time since otherwise he might get hurt. The advice is taken seriously.

Once we’re out in private we have a discussion on what to do the next time we meet some goblins. Tony is very serious about telling them that there will be no setting people on fire (to Bob) and no explosions (to DJ) since they will be talking their way through the encounters. So future encounters mean no raising weapons! He drills this into their heads.

DJ: I wanted to protect Mom!

Rhodey covers his mouth to stop laughing.

Rhodey: That’s great, but I don’t need protection.

Tony: But it’s a sweet thought, isn’t it, Hubby?

Everyone in the VC cracks up laughing.

Rhodey: Hubby?

Bob: Is that better or worse than "Rhodeo”?

Zira is confused about when we actually got married but then realizes it’s another nickname. Just a bad one that is not worse than Rhodeo.

Tony: You love all my nicknames. Don’t even lie.

We continue on this vein.

DM: Clint is still there, by the way.

thechaoticwave: I give him another arrow and bolt.

DM: Goddamn it.

Rhodey is decidedly unimpressed with Zira mentioning Rhodeo.

Rhodey: Please, I would take any nickname over “Rhodeo.”

Zira, cheerfully: Okay, Mom!

We continue onwards and don’t run into anymore issues aside from two hobgoblins. Rhodey rolls a great performance check after Tony says he has to walk in like he’s supposed to be there. The hobgoblins are easily enough fooled and direct us to where the boss is as Tony asks if he’s in the usual place.

Most of the group is really uncertain about going to where the boss is so Tony opts for majority opinion. Clint pulls them back and they do end up knocking on the boss’s door.

Bob hides behind Clint since he can’t hide his beak. He also stuffs his new glass staff into Tony’s bag of holding.

thechaoticwave: How tall is Clint?

DM: Hang on, let me Google how tall Jeremy Renner is.

Our employer is in the room! Along with one bugbear, one pet wolf, and one drow (who is working for the Black Spider). They’re irritated to see us but we’re still in disguise and Tony tries to bluff his way through it but we reach a stalemate.

Bob really wants to set things on fire and asks Tony if he can. Tony nods; Rhodey catches the nod. The three of them get in a surprise round!

Bob heads over to our employer and heals him some.

This is the first time we’ve spoken to Ryss since session 1.

Bob: Hey, what's crackalackin?

We’re in actual combat and Dox realizes something important about our combat order...

Dox: When did Clint go?

DM: FUCK

The drow - badly injured - transforms into a mirror image of Rhodey! ...They’re still on fire.

Reba: I want to hit the drow.

DM: What drow? There's just Rhodey.

Mid-combat, Bob asks Tony for his glass staff. I take up an entire action to throw the staff right to him. One awesome DEX save later and Bob catches it.

Zira moves to attack the drow, who still looks like Rhodey. She switches personalities to 465.

DM: So 465 doesn’t give a shit about Rhodey?

Helio: 465 doesn’t give a shit about anyone.

We defeat the drow and the bugbear and the wolf! And there’s loot! And Ryss is okay! We have a map to the Lost Mine!

Reba about the bag of holding: It's an Armory of Holding and a Bag of Healing.

Clint heads off with Ryss (several bolts and arrows later) once we sneak out the castle the back way. The rest of the group will head off to the Lost Mine next session!

Aaaaand that’s a wrap! (And so much bullshitting but surprisingly not many lies.)

#rebaobsessions #heliocentricgeometric #thechaoticwave #doxblogsstuff #the-grey-hunt #imagine1117 #there was so much bullshitting #it was so much fun to have tony say that stuff #d&d campaign

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kentremendousblog · 6 years

Link

I was deeply honored to stand at the White House July 9 with my wife, Ashley, and my daughters, Margaret and Liza, to accept President Trump’s nomination to succeed my former boss and mentor, Justice Anthony Kennedy, on the Supreme Court.

This is a long, bad, run-on sentence. Aren’t you supposed to be a good writer?

My mom, Martha—one of the first women to serve as a Maryland prosecutor and trial judge, and my inspiration to become a lawyer—sat in the audience with my dad, Ed.

Cool story. Can we talk about literally anything that’s important?

That night, I told the American people who I am and what I believe.

I remember! You said a bunch of boring stuff, that the Federalist Society and Don McGahn and whoever else coached you to say. It was very typical, and mostly empty, rhetoric. In its pleasant tone, it reminded me a lot of the things Merrick Garland said when he was in a similar situation in 2016.

I talked about my 28-year career as a lawyer, almost all of which has been in public service. I talked about my 12 years as a judge on the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit, often called the second most important court in the country, and my five years of service in the White House for President George W. Bush.

Fun side-note: literally millions of documents from your time in those jobs were buried, for no reason! Or rather, for the reason of: fuck you, nobody gets to see them, just cuz.

I talked about my long record of advancing and promoting women, including as a judge—a majority of my 48 law clerks have been women—and as a longtime coach of girls’ basketball teams.

Yeah...listen: a lot of people who are racist like to talk about their black friends. A lot of people who are misogynists like to talk about the women they’ve helped. A lot of people who do a lot of bad shit like to talk about the good shit they’ve done instead. Roy Moore’s wife, at a rally, once proudly announced that her husband couldn’t hate women because he made her the President of something or other, and also he couldn’t be a bigot like people were saying, because one of her attorneys was a Jew. So. Just, like, FYI, this isn’t a good defense of anything.

As I explained that night, a good judge must be an umpire—a neutral and impartial arbiter who favors no political party, litigant or policy.

Oh yeah! You did. I forgot about that, because much more recently you did a bunch of insane crazy stuff!

As Justice Kennedy has stated, judges do not make decisions to reach a preferred result. Judges make decisions because the law and the Constitution compel the result. Over the past 12 years, I have ruled sometimes for the prosecution and sometimes for criminal defendants, sometimes for workers and sometimes for businesses, sometimes for environmentalists and sometimes for coal miners. In each case, I have followed the law. I do not decide cases based on personal or policy preferences. I am not a pro-plaintiff or pro-defendant judge. I am not a pro-prosecution or pro-defense judge. I am a pro-law judge.

First of all, saying you’re a “pro-law judge” is like saying you’re a “pro-hitting-tennis-balls tennis player.” The law is literally the thing you are there to engage with. How can you not be a “pro-law judge?” Second: what you really are is conservative. You’re the most reliably conservative judge on the D.C. Circuit. You rule on the politically conservative side of the issue essentially constantly. That’s why you were standing in the Rose Garden, giving that speech -- because you’re a judicial partisan hack.

As Justice Kennedy showed us, a judge must be independent, not swayed by public pressure. Our independent judiciary is the crown jewel of our constitutional republic. The Supreme Court is the last line of defense for the separation of powers, and for the rights and liberties guaranteed by the Constitution.

Blargdy blargdy blargdy can we get to the part where you started screaming about lifting weights in high school?

The Supreme Court must never be viewed as a partisan institution. The justices do not sit on opposite sides of an aisle. They do not caucus in separate rooms. As I have said repeatedly, if confirmed to the court, I would be part of a team of nine, committed to deciding cases according to the Constitution and laws of the United States. I would always strive to be a team player.

“And the evidence for this is that I have literally never done it in my entire life!”

During the confirmation process, I met with 65 senators and explained my approach to the law. I participated in more than 30 hours of hearings before the Senate Judiciary Committee, and I submitted written answers to nearly 1,300 additional questions. I was grateful for the opportunity. After all those meetings and after my initial hearing concluded, I was subjected to wrongful and sometimes vicious allegations. My time in high school and college, more than 30 years ago, has been ridiculously distorted. My wife and daughters have faced vile and violent threats.

Against that backdrop, I testified before the Judiciary Committee last Thursday to defend my family, my good name and my lifetime of public service.

Yeah...we remember, man. Because you were screaming. You ranted and raved and blustered. You said this whole thing was a smear campaign orchestrated by your political enemies. You straight-up lied about what various things mean, like “boof” and “Devil’s Triangle” and you also lied about how much you like beer. You essentially called a number of women -- women who have accused you of improper sexually aggressive conduct -- liars. You said this was all retribution for what you did to the Clintons. When Amy Klobuchar -- a sitting U.S. Senator -- asked you if you had ever blacked out while drinking, you snidely shot back, “Have you?!” as if the fucking U.S. Senate is not there to evaluate you, but vice-versa. You said “What goes around comes around,” meaning: “when I’m on the bench I’m gonna fuck up the Democrats just cuz.”

You know -- the kind of stuff a Supreme Court Justice is supposed to say.

My hearing testimony was forceful and passionate.

I’d say more like “scream-y and entitled and whiny and absurd and partisan and embarrassing and awful and terrifying to all non-rich-white dudes in the country.” But “forceful and passionate” works too, I suppose.

That is because I forcefully and passionately denied the allegation against me. At times, my testimony—both in my opening statement and in response to questions—reflected my overwhelming frustration at being wrongly accused, without corroboration, of horrible conduct completely contrary to my record and character.

It’s not, though, is it? It’s not contrary to your record. Your record is that you drank a ton, and behaved like an entitled dick, and what you were accused of, essentially, was drinking a ton and acting like an entitled dick.

My statement and answers also reflected my deep distress at the unfairness of how this allegation has been handled.

Huh. Dr. Ford’s answers reflected her deep distress at you having drunkenly pawed at her clothes and stifled her screams when she was fifteen years old. And she kept it together.

I was very emotional last Thursday, more so than I have ever been. I might have been too emotional at times. I know that my tone was sharp, and I said a few things I should not have said.

...I mean, yeah. You did.

I hope everyone can understand that I was there as a son, husband and dad. I testified with five people foremost in my mind: my mom, my dad, my wife, and most of all my daughters.

Your mom, dad, wife, and daughters made you froth at the mouth and scream that this was a conspiracy perpetrated by your political enemies to avenge your treatment of the Clintons?

Going forward, you can count on me to be the same kind of judge and person I have been for my entire 28-year legal career: hardworking, even-keeled, open-minded, independent and dedicated to the Constitution and the public good.

That’s not what you are, man. I know you can’t say this out loud, but we all know that’s not what you are.

As a judge, I have always treated colleagues and litigants with the utmost respect. I have been known for my courtesy on and off the bench. I have not changed. I will continue to be the same kind of judge I have been for the last 12 years. And I will continue to contribute to our country as a coach, volunteer, and teacher.

Oh okay good as long as you keep coaching basketball we’re cool.

Every day I will try to be the best husband, dad, and friend I can be. I will remain optimistic, on the sunrise side of the mountain. I will continue to see the day that is coming, not the day that is gone.

Stay away from florid language, man. You’re a middle-aged angry rich white D.C. prep school kid. Poesy doesn’t suit you.

I revere the Constitution. I believe that an independent and impartial judiciary is essential to our constitutional republic. If confirmed by the Senate to serve on the Supreme Court, I will keep an open mind in every case and always strive to preserve the Constitution of the United States and the American rule of law.

No you won’t, man. I know you can’t say this out loud, but we all know you won’t.

Judge Kavanaugh has been nominated as an associate justice of the U.S. Supreme Court.

Yeah, WSJ. I know. Believe me -- I know.

#WSJ #kavanaugh #editorials #fjm

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lalainajanes · 6 years

Text

@thetourguidebarbie and I were complaining about the Polyvore alternatives and I found this truly awful dress on one. Celeb AU fluff was born.

Lookin’ Sharp

She’s exhausted, the consultation she’s walked out of had been a battle, one she’d had to smile through. Caroline’s dealt with difficult people before, had eagerly tackled this latest job. She’d never been one to back down from a challenge but then she’s never met a woman who thought a shapeless shiny mint green caftan was a good look for a Golden Globes after party.

Until today.

She really should have listened to Kat when she’d warned Caroline that socialites were the worst people to style. Caroline had brushed off the words at the time, figuring that her client’s reputation – sweet, agreeable, super committed to using her dad’s money to help ex-cons – would mean she’d be an easy paycheck. She’s mentally listing jewelers who like her, hoping she can find a necklace spectacular enough to distract from the chosen dress’ awfulness. She’s thinking diamonds the size of golf balls might do the trick.

“It’s a lost cause, you know.”

Caroline’s heart lurches when the words ring out, her body tensing. She whirls, dropping the armful of garment bags she’d been lugging out to her car. She hadn’t recognized the voice – she’s never heard Klaus Mikaelson say so many words at once. At least not in real life.

He’s a few paces behind her, hands up and a contrite expression on his distractingly handsome face. “Apologies,” he murmurs.

She relaxes, but not completely. She’s pretty sure Klaus isn’t going to stuff her into a trunk but he’s still a very big deal for a girl trying to make a name for herself in Hollywood. Caroline presses a hand over her chest, takes a deep breath. “You scared me. Do they teach you how to walk like a sneaky ghost when you sign up to play a superhero or something?”

He smiles, “I wasn’t making an effort to be silent. Perhaps you were just preoccupied?”

That’s possible. The fitting she’d just left had not gone well. A client who flat out refused to listen to sense, who appeared to see something vastly different than Caroline did when she looked in a mirror, was proving to be really freaking frustrating.

But she couldn’t exactly tell the client’s boyfriend that, could she?

She pastes on a sunny smile, “Well, award’s season’s just about to go into full swing. I have a lot on my plate. I’m sure you’re very busy too.”

Caroline hopes that’s a subtle enough hint. She’s curious about why he’s followed her out, hadn’t been lying about having an extensive to do list. She’s positive she hadn’t forgotten anything, that the four trips between condo and parking garage haven’t been in vain. She can’t exactly go making demands though, not from a guy whose next movie is projected to have a 100 million dollar opening weekend.

“Not for a few weeks yet,” Klaus says, crouching to gather her scattered things. Caroline hurriedly follows, brushing off the pebbles and dust from the bags he hands her. “I’m just supposed to smile for the cameras and look pretty. Make people forget about the… incident in Las Vegas.”

She chances a glance at him, unsure of how to react to that statement. She’d never have thought he’d make such a direct reference.

Caroline knew there’s no way she’d be able to be blasé if photos of her naked body had been splashed all over the internet. Then again, she’d never play strip poker with total strangers.

It hadn’t quite been a full frontal shot - Klaus had been lucky, and a champagne bottle had been left on an end table - saving the pics from being fully NC-17. Had circumstances been different they might not have even caused a stir. Klaus Mikaelson’s resume had a couple of racy film and TV appearances from before he’d left England on it, not that Caroline had googled him.

Okay, fine. She hadn’t googled him recently. And she definitely hasn’t watched the compilation of all his sex scenes on YouTube since she’d met him in person.

Unfortunately for Klaus (and really unfortunately for his publicists) the timing of the photos of his drunken debauchery leaking couldn’t have come at a worse time.

He’d been voicing a character in an animated feature when they’d come out, a gruff but loveable lone wolf who learned about the power of friendship. That, plus a superhero blockbuster on deck, meant he had to appeal to the broadest audience possible.

The pictures were the opposite of wholesome, damage control was necessary. He’d been volunteering with soup kitchens, had adopted a rescue dog. Had gone public with a relationship, one with a textbook good girl, and had been seen holding hands and getting fro-yo and generally being snuggly.

In public, at least. In private, from what Caroline’s observed, the relationship isn’t the warmest. Klaus has usually been in the background, glued to his phone and making noncommittal grunts when asked for an opinion.

Caroline’s not sure how to address the Vegas incident without putting her foot in her mouth so she decides to go back to his original statement. She straightens, folding the stack of dresses over her arm, “What did you mean about a lost cause?”

He’s edged closer when he stands. She keeps her eyes trained on his face, not on the way the fine weave of his shirt clings to his shoulders. “Just that your work’s not going to end up on any best dressed lists. You’ve tried to steer her towards flattering and age appropriate but she’s remarkably convinced her perspective is the right one. It’s not just clothes, if it’s any consolation. It’s everything.”

Wow. It certainly seemed like there was trouble in paradise. Caroline does her best to be diplomatic, “Personal style is a funny thing, I guess.”

He grins, head tipping to the side, “That’s an impressive non-answer. My publicist would be proud.”

“It’s a gossipy industry. Badmouthing clients is going to lead to fewer opportunities not more.”

His eyes sharpen, “Ah, speaking of opportunities, I’d wondered if you might do me a favor.”

A favor? That seems suspicious. “What kind?”

He laughs softly, “Nothing nefarious, love. I’d merely like a ride.”

“A ride?” she repeats, eyes shifting over to the black SUV she knows belongs to Klaus.

“In your backseat. Covered in a few of the bags you brought with you. Passed the paparazzi that are staked out on this block. They need to think I’ve spent the night, you see. And I’d really rather not.”

This conversation just got weirder and weirder. “Did you… I mean, it’s not any of my business if you guys are fighting but maybe talking it out would be better than fleeing?”

He looks at her as if she’s said something crazy. “We don’t talk. Well, no more than necessary.”

“Sounds like a healthy relationship,” Caroline quips. Her eyes widen and her teeth snap shut in horror. Had she seriously just said that? She’s so freaking fired.

Klaus surprises her though. He laughs again, louder this time, the sound echoing off the concrete walls around them. She’s confused, and frozen, unwilling to say anything that might make things even worse. When he calms he shifts closer, relieving her of some of the bags. “We’re not in a relationship, sweetheart. Not really. It’s a contract. A mutually beneficial agreement. I raise her profile, she makes me look like a fine upstanding citizen. Everybody wins.”

Huh. While Caroline knows those kind of arrangements happen, at least intellectually, she’d never expected to be a party to one. “That sounds…”

“Awkward?” Klaus supplies, “tedious? I can assure you it’s both. We’ll have an amicable breakup in April, pledge to stay friends. I’ll be done with press and can disappear for a bit.”

A thought occurs to Caroline, one that she doesn’t like. “Wait, did you fake adopt a dog too? Because that’s not cool.” She’d seen snaps of him walking the dog, some kind of Labrador mutt, and it’s really freaking cute.

“No, Munch was legally and truly adopted. He’s likely being given too many treats by my assistant as we speak.

Caroline nods sharply, satisfied, and fishes out her keys so she can pop the trunk of her car. “Good. If you were a faking a dog adoption I’d have to assume you’re a garbage person and I would not let you in my backseat.”

“Big fan of dogs, are you?”

“In theory, yes. Not in practice just yet.”

She begins loading up, carefully arranging things for maximum space use. She feels Klaus watching her carefully but she focuses on her task. Now that she knows he’s single the little devil on her shoulder is urging her to flirt. Whispering that the worst thing that would happen is that he wouldn’t reciprocate.

And if he did? Well, Caroline wouldn’t mind seeing him naked again. Would be seriously onboard with touching him while he was naked.

“Perhaps you’d like to meet him? You could come in for a bit once you’ve dropped me off?” he asks.

Caroline rears back, nearly hitting her head on the open trunk.

Klaus makes a soft noise, concerned, and his palm brushes over the back of her head, lowering to settle on her shoulder. “Careful. No need to injure yourself. I’d much rather we have dinner than take a trip to the emergency room.”

Maybe she had hit her head. “Dinner?” she parrots. “Like, together?”

He nods, a smile curling his lips. His thumb strokes her neck, an absent gesture that’s unfairly distracting. “You, me, the dog begging for crumbs. We’re working on it but his manners aren’t the best just yet. If that goes well I hope you’ll agree to do it again sometime.”

Clearly, Caroline hadn’t needed to talk herself out of flirting. Klaus didn’t share her qualms. Unless this was another step in his image rehab. She shifts back until he’s no longer touching her, crossing her arms. “Is this another contract kind of thing? Dating someone who’s not super rich so you seem down to earth?”

Klaus denial is immediate, “No, nothing like that. I’ve just spent an awful lot of time studying your face, wondering at the comments you’ve been holding back. Your face is remarkably easy to read when you’re frustrated.”

Whoops. Caroline makes a note to work on that. Her clients were a self-absorbed group but it’s possibly someone would notice her inner screaming at some point and she couldn’t have that. At least not until she’s more established. “I suppose I could eat,” Caroline says slowly.

Klaus expression warms, his pleasure evident. “Lovely. Just let me program my address into your phone.”

Caroline hands it over willingly, doesn’t shy away from the brush of his fingers against hers, letting her body brush against his more than necessary as she returns to packing up.

Half-assing things isn’t in her nature. If Caroline’s going to flirt (and oh boy is she ever) she’s going to do it right.

#klaroline #klaroline drabbles #a break from all the smut

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pulverulents · 4 years

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#29: in the highlands and the heartache

I feel like I say this way too often in these journal entries, but uh, it's been a while. Hi.

I just read through my last entry, and... woah. So that was rock bottom, huh? Scary. A lot of things have happened in the months since then. I'd like to think I'm in a better place now, but the truth is there's been so much that's happened that it's difficult to take stock.

Where should I start? It's been a long summer. I'm not staying in hall anymore, obviously, and I won't be anymore for the rest of my uni life. And living at home has been difficult. I've experienced such a rollercoaster of emotions over the last few months that I almost don't feel real anymore.

Let's start with something not as depressing. Believe it or not, there's been joy. Since phase 2 started, I've been going out with friends regularly. I used to be terrified that i would leave hall and not talk to any of my hall friends anymore, and I'm so so so glad that time has proven me wrong. And there’s the new Taylor Swift album folklore, which is quickly becoming my favourite album of hers, and which, despite the complete and utter abruptness / surprise / shock, has come at literally no better timing. And there's my sister, who has been such a blessing lately. She's an asshole and an idiot, but I love her a lot and have laughed so much with her despite everything else that has been happening. And it's been healing. All this joy, laughter, and love. Slowly but surely, I’m learning how to let myself heal.

But there's also been sadness. Discovering sad songs, watching sad musicals, the passing of Grant Imahara, who has been one of my childhood role models. But above all, the growing sense that I've been robbed of my childhood. I went to a friend's house recently, and was completely blown away by how nice their parents were. We all ate dinner together, and we were all actually talking. In fact, we were talking so much that nobody was paying attention to the movie that we spent 20 minutes picking out to watch while we ate. It was so incredible and wonderful and the entire room was just glowing and throbbing with joy and love and then I remembered that waiting for me at home was a lifetime of enforced silence during mealtimes when the only time anyone spoke it was my mother scolding us or arguing with my dad or complaining about some minor offence that one of us had committed earlier that day. And on the journey home, as I felt the dread grow and grow, I couldn’t stop thinking that this was just another thing to add on to the already unhealthy amount that I relate to Evan Hansen. I read somewhere on reddit that I need to let myself grieve the loss of my childhood and the loss of proper loving parents in order to truly move on and heal and love myself, but it's difficult to mourn something that technically hasn't ended yet and likely won't end anytime soon.

There's been anger. And lots of it. At my parents, at society, at myself, at God. It's no secret that I have a very difficult relationship with my parents to say the least, and it's been increasingly difficult to not fight back, even though I know that fighting back never ends well. In the midst of an argument discussion about politics, my mother recently declared to me in the car that she was a racist, and I've never experienced that kind of rage before. I was speechless. And throughout the remainder of that drive, all I could do was sit there and listen to her yell at me and my sister as the anger just got heavier and heavier inside my chest with no outlet to escape. And of the countless times my mother has made me angry, I've never felt it in that way before, and I still don’t really know why. I've always disliked politics and so I've never really bothered to form any opinions on it every time election season rolls around. But with what’s been happening in the world and in Singapore lately, I've suddenly become extremely uncomfortable remaining apolitical and "neutral". I recently told a friend that as much as I don’t like politics, I refuse to use my privilege as an excuse to be apathetic about it, and I'll stand by that statement.

But honestly speaking, anger and anguish and anxiety have all been no stranger to me in the 20 years that i've had the misfortune of being alive. And there are days when I'm still in denial that these emotions are real and valid and won't be magically vanishing anytime soon. I could say more, but most days I’m just tired of trying to be my own therapist. Other days I’m just mad that after so long of repeating the same advice to myself, I keep falling back into the same mindsets and the same cycles of self-loathing which makes me even angrier at myself and then the vicious cycle just goes on and on ad infinitum. I used to direct some of that towards God and I still do sometimes, but more often than not it just results in more guilt and then my solution to that is to just not bring it to God at all, so.. I haven’t spoken to God in a while. Probably just one of my “running away” coping mechanisms.

As I’m typing this, I have just turned 21. (Well, not just, it’s technically been 23 minutes since it’s 23 minutes past midnight but eh same difference.) Amidst all of the people pestering me to celebrate and throw a party or something (mostly my parents), I can’t help but think of when I was 16 and had my birthday marred by yelling and screaming, and then at 17 I thought ‘maybe this time will be better’ (spoiler alert: it wasn’t). And ever since then, I’ve detested my own birthday. I guess it just taught me that my birthday wasn’t anything special, and just like literally every other day, I am equally likely to be a recipient of some sort of verbal or emotional abuse, and thus equally likely to have a depressive episode and / or panic attack at 11pm on the bathroom floor.

But my hall friends came over 2 days ago just for a regular gathering, and they sprung a not-so-surprise surprise celebration on me even though I told them not to. But it was lovely, and even though they’ve only known me for like 2 years, I’ve rarely felt so loved and appreciated. The imposter syndrome in me won’t shut up about how it’s probably just a fluke that I somehow managed to convince them that I’m a better, smarter, more talented human being than I actually am, and that part of my brain wants to feel guilty that I’ve deceived them into thinking that, but I’ve been getting better in forcing that part of my brain to not feel that way most of the time. Which is nice, I guess. It’s an improvement, in any case.

So maybe this year will be different. Maybe it won’t. Maybe the rest of my adult life will be irreparably marred by yelling and screaming. And life has taught me that hope is foolish, but maybe I want to be foolish sometimes. It feels better than the alternative, that’s for sure. Maybe I’ll live through adulthood desperately wanting to be foolish, desperately holding onto whatever joy and laughter and love I can find and guarding it close to my heart as safely as I can. Maybe these memories will be as untouchable as the ones that seek to rip them out and tear them apart. And maybe all of this doesn’t make any sense at all. I don’t know. I used to think when I was 17 that all this childhood trauma has wisened me up, but now at 21, I now know that there are really a lot of things that I don’t know.

In any case, the only thing I can do now is just... move forward, I guess? Probably a little ambitious, I know. I’ve been running away a lot as a way to deal with this godforsaken mess that is my life, but maybe it would be a good start to stop running and just.. wait the storm out. Maybe Aaron Burr said it best -

“Life doesn’t discriminate between the sinners and the saints / It takes and it takes and it takes and we keep living anyway / We rise and we fall and we break and we make our mistakes / And if there’s a reason I’m still alive when so many have died /

Then I'm willing to wait for it."

-jo

#journal #entry 29

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writingismyhappytime · 7 years

Text

Baby Daddy ( Part 4)

Ryan Sitkowski x reader

Warnings: language, angst, mention of abortion

"Okay, what's going on?" Ricky demands, and Ryan looks up from his phone where he'd been texting you, in the middle of another argument; that's all the two of you seem to do now, argue about the baby, argue about whether to keep it, argue about the weirdest little shit because neither of you know what to say otherwise.

"Huh?" "You. What's going on? You're acting like the world is ending lately." Ricky frowns, concerned; Ryan isn't acting like himself at all. "Oh." Ryan looks back down. "Nothing." Shit. Rickys going to have to beat it out of him. He's never seen Ryan act like this before, and he can hear you and him fighting on the phone at all hours of the day and night. He's determined to know what's going on, something is obviously wrong. "Ryan," Ricky sits down on the coffee table in front of his friend, not going to let it go. "You can tell me what's going on." Ryan glances up, his gaze wavering; fuck, he wants too so bad! He wants to talk to someone about it, get someone else's opinion but.... he feels like it should be between the two of you. It's your baby after all. But.... God, he doesn't know what to do, and you're no help! All you do is bitch at him now or cry or yell at him and none of its getting any better! Everything is bad! He needs help! He trusts Ricky, they've been friends for a long time --- who better then to confess too? "I fucked up." Ryan says after a moment, looking sick. "I fucked up really bad." "What did you do?" Ricky hesitates, the worry in the pit of his stomach growing. What could possibly be so bad? "I... she....." the words are choking Ryan down. He runs his hands down his face, sucking in a deep, weary breath as he finally says the words. "(Y/N)s pregnant." Ricky just looks at him. Ryan can see the wheels turning in his head. Rickys eyes are suddenly saucers as the bell goes off, and he straightens, his mouth open but no words coming out. Oh shit, is all he thinks. "Dude..." "I fucked up so bad," Ryan mutters, looking miserable. "I don't know what to do!" "What.... how is (Y/N)...?" "Not handling it well. We don't --- we've not even been together that long!" Ryan squawks, finally venting his frustration. "I don't see how this happened! We're so fucking careful! I can't have a kid! I don't know what to do, or what she expects me to do! She just harps and cries!" "How far is she?" Ricky likes you, of course, but it could always not be Ryans kid. "Seven --- eight weeks now." Ryan mumbles, sinking lown in his chair. "She didn't know until last week." So that's why everyone's been freaking out. It makes so much more sense now. "Okay." Ricky pauses a moment, letting his elbows rest on his knees as he gathers his thoughts. "So... what's the plan then? Are you keeping it or getting rid of it?" By the guilty look on Ryans face Ricky knows the answer. "We can't have a kid right now," Ryan mutters, looking down at his phone, his half written text staring back at him, not as nice as what it should be. "It won't work." Oh. "So she's getting an abortion?" Ryan grimaces. "She's made an appointment." He erases his text, suddenly not wanting to send it. "Is that what she wants?" "It's what she did. I never told her she had too, I just.... Ricky, I can't have a kid right now!" Ryan's panicked at just the idea. "I've only been dating her three months, I don't even know her that well yet! This wasn't supposed to happen! If we'd known each other longer or if our lives were different --- maybe. But I'm on tour months out of the year, and she's full time basically running that store by herself --- where are we gonna fit a kid in that equation? We can't, it'll just be fucked up. Everything will go to hell. We can't have it. We can't." "Is that what you told her?" "In a lot less words, but she didn't disagree. She's just... I don't know," Ryan sighs, leaning back in his chair and staring up at the ceiling, his stomach feeling like it's full of rocks. "Conflicted, I guess." "Understandably." Ricky murmurs, frowning. Welp, Ryan had really gotten himself into some shit, that's for sure. It sounds like you're not going to keep the baby, though. But Ricky isn't sure if that's really going to make anything better, if you were okay with that option you and Ryan wouldn't be fighting so vehemently about it. Do you want to keep it? Is Ryan pressuring you to get rid of it? Is it the other way around? The situation is way too complicated. "When's her appointment?" "Monday." "Are you going to be there?" "I.... I don't know. I don't know if she wants me there." "Maybe you should ask." "Fuck, Rick.... Mondays my recording day, and Chris will pitch a fit if I bail," Ryan's looking for an excuse not to go, he's not sure he could. "She's mad at me anyway, it's... I probably shouldn't..." "Well that's up to you, man." Ricky sort of wishes he'd never asked, this is complicated shit. "It's your girlfriend and your baby. But you can't take this back, yknow. If she gets rid of it, it's gone forever, and from the sounds of it so is your relationship." Yeah. Ryan figured. "Have you guys even thought about making it work even with a kid?" "We've not really discussed that option much." Ryan mumbles. He's... as conflicted as you are. It's all the moral bullshit, too, that's driving you crazy. You're worried if it'll hurt the baby, if it can feel pain yet, if it knows --- something about it already having finger nails. Fuck if Ryan knows. He just.... He doesn't want his life to change yet, he's not ready for such a big step. He hadn't even planned for a kid! He just bought a new guitar! He doesn't want to go to the clinic with you, sit there while you cry and fill out paperwork so all the staff and other women can look at him judgementally. He can already picture it, sitting in that chair beside you as they suck the baby out through at tube; he has no idea if it hurts or not, or the repercussions of it. Would you bleed a lot? Would it hurt you? You're supposed to still be able to have kids right? Maybe he should do some research. But why should he? It's done, you've made your appointment. You've committed to the fact you're going and that's not going to change, or at least you're acting like it won't. So... So there's not really much else to discuss or argue about with you, is there? Nope. None. None at all... ~~~~~ You're shaking as you muster up the courage to step into the cold clinic, relieved that the protestors standing outside with the signs and the jars of blood you'd had in your head aren't there at all. Your eyes flick around, seeing only one other woman in the waiting room, looking bored as she flips through her magazine. It's cold, smells just like a doctors office, and you're glad you brought your coat in as you walk to the desk where a woman sits behind glass. She smiles at you, asks your name and everything, slips you a clipboard of paperwork to fill out and asks you to take a seat. It's just as if it's a normal doctors visit, not a life-altering choice. You sit down slowly in a plastic chair, feeling like you've rocks in your stomach as you stare down at the papers, the words swimming in front of your eyes until they don't make sense anymore. You don't want to do this. It had hit you last night how much you didn't, how you could probably take care of it by yourself, how you didn't need to throw it's potential life away just so you could continue yours the way you want, the way Ryan wants. It's so selfish to you; you'd messed up somehow, and now there's a tiny life growing inside of you. It's your responsibility to take care of it and help it grow into its own little person, that's the entire reason you're even able to conceive, right? You're supposed to go forth and multiply and all that bullshit. But Ryans right. You're not ready to be a parent, you couldn't provide for the child like it would need, and your only source of income is the store. Ryan might say he'll be there for you, but he might not. He might hang around for a few months, but as adamant as he is for you not to keep it, you can't imagine him staying when it gets hard, when the baby is born and you're up all hours of the night with it screaming. It wouldn't work. He'd leave you, just like your own father had done your mother. He'd leave, pay child support, but he'd never see the baby, he'd never be there on birthdays or holidays or when it counted most; he'd just be a name on a paycheck that the child wouldn't even care about, wouldn't understand; why didn't it's dad want to come see it? You'd be by yourself raising a child and you might regret it and treat it badly. You don't want to be the bitter woman your mother was. It's why you always strive to be positive, always have a smile or kind word. You won't be like her. You don't want to take out your anger on your little baby, make it feel unwanted or wish it was never born. You'd want it to be happy, to have two parents that it knows loves it unconditionally. You and Ryan can't give it that, though, can you? He's firmly said he doesn't want a child, but you can't blame him. It's a shock, a surprise --- neither of you know each other well, you've never met the others parents or other family. You don't even know each other very well. Who's to say he wouldn't hate the child? Who's to say he wouldn't absolutely adore it? You're just so unsure! You don't want to do this! You're scared! You don't want to hurt it, you don't want it to feel pain, or, or ---. But you're here, you're in the clinic. All you have to do is fill out some paperwork and you won't have any of that to worry over, right? It's that easy. It might haunt you for the rest of your life, but that's something you'll have to contend with. You blink a couple times, the words on the papers in front of you coming into focus. You need to get through this, be strong. You don't need Ryan here supporting you, you can do this on your own. You can make this decision on your own. He'd asked if you'd wanted him to come, but the way he'd phrased it had been clear he didn't actually want too, so you'd told him no. You could do this. You sniffle, wiping at your eyes with the back of your sleeve, feeling how sore and raw they are. You feel like you haven't slept in days, and you haven't. Your eyes are throbbing, you look as horrible as you feel, and it's clear you'd rather be anywhere but in that clinic. You lift up the pen chained to the clipboard, swallowing hard against the ball in your throat as you slowly begin filling it out. ~~~~~ Ryan can't focus. All he can think about is you, all alone in that cold waiting room, being strong and getting rid of the baby he'd help create. He's restless, he can't sit still and he can't do anything, he just keeps checking his phone, pacing, his nerves tight. He should've gone with you. He should be there right now for you and helping you through it. Or telling you not to do it. He's thought about it, he's listened to what Rickys had to say and he's really thought about it. It wouldn't be the end of the world for the two of you to have a baby, would it? You could manage, you could make it work. Even if the two of you break up that doesn't mean the kid still won't have its parents. It'll always have a mom and dad. Him as a dad. You as a mom. Fuck, but he doesn't want a kid! He doesn't know the first thing about them! They say there's books but who the fuck actually reads those? Ricky watches Ryan pace back and forth, frowning. Ryans obviously bothered by the fact you're getting an abortion, but if he doesn't like the idea so bad why doesn't he go and tell you not too? Obviously you didn't want too. Ricky thinks you're doing it more because you think it's what Ryan wants. Ricky glances at the other guys huddled around the soundboard before getting to his feet, walking to where Ryan is staring down at his phone. "Hey man." "Hey." "So... any news?" "No, her appointment isn't for another hour." "Ah. You sure you don't wanna bail and go be with her?" Ryan glances back uneasily; he does want too. He doesn't want to be in the studio, he wants to be there with you. And he wants to tell you not to do it. "Chris ---." "I'll handle Chris," Ricky says firmly, giving his friend a little nudge. "You go and be a dad." "Rick..." "If you don't want her to do it, then you need to say so and stop her before it's too late, man." Rickys right. Ryans gotta go. He sends one more fleeting glance towards the other guys before taking off, making a beeline for the back exit. good. Ricky was hoping Ryan would make the right decision. ~~~~ You're almost done with the paperwork, you just hope the year stains marring the ink wouldn't make a difference. You frown as you rise to your feet, reluctantly making your way back to the window and sliding the clipboard to the woman, who gives you as sad look as she nudges tissues in your direction. "You don't have too," she says; she'd been watching you sniffle for the past twenty minutes. "I know," you mutter as you turn away, sitting back down. But you do have too. ~~~~~ Fuck, why couldn't you answer your phone!? Ryans called you probably thirty times at this point! he hopes he isn't too late! He's anxious, he's worried, his stomach is a ball pit of emotions and he's sure he's going to be sick any minute. He never should have agreed or made you feel like you had to get an abortion. He's sure something will work out for the two of you and you can raise the baby by yourselves. You have parents, right? They'll help. And his would. Fuck, just the timing is so bad! He presses harder on the gas, weaving in and out of traffic impatiently, knowing he doesn't have much time --- he has to stop you! He has to save his kid! ~~~~~ "DONT!" You jerk in alarm, whirling around as someone practically shouts. You stare, your jaw dropping as you see Ryan sprinting in your direction, the clinic doors slowly shutting behind him. "Ryan ---!?" "Don't do it!" He gasps, staggering to a stop in front of you. He's panting for breath, and he leans over, pressing his hands against his knees as he wheezes for air. He couldn't find a parking spot, he's had to run the last block and a half to get here, and if he takes another step he'll pass out. You stare down at him, you and everyone else in the room. He looks like a madman, no wonder everyone is suddenly so tense! "Ryan?" You hesitate, and after a moment, he straightens, his face red and still sucking in lung fulls of air. "Don't... do it," he huffs, staring down at you. "You don't have too. Let's have it." "What?" You look at him like he's lost his mind. "Are you --- why ---?" "I thought about it," he says, grabbing your hands and holding on tight. "I did. I thought about it and I realized I was being a total asshole and I don't want you to do it! Keep the baby, we'll raise it. Move in with me. Or I'll move in with you. Or we don't have to move in together," he adds hastily. "Whatevers cool with you, just --- let's have the thing!" He could have run you over with a bulldozer and you wouldn't have been so shocked. "But you didn't want ---." "Now I do." His warm hands rise to cup your tear stained face. "Let's have the baby. We can do it!" He has no idea how, but he's sure it'll work itself out. "Are you --- are you sure?" You hesitate, searching his eyes. Has Ryan been kidnapped? Body snatched? Does he have brain damage? He was so against the baby earlier, you neve thought... does he really want it? Is he sincere? "You really want to keep it?" No. "Yes." He answers, nodding vigorously. "I do. Let's keep it. We'll figure it out." It can't be that hard. You find yourself nodding, your shoulders slumping in relief; you hadnt wanted to get rid of the baby, but you hadnt felt like you'd had much choice. Ryan beams at you, his lips catching yours briefly before his fingers tangle in yours and he's dragging you to the front door before you can react, eager to put the clinic behind the two of you. The two of you are going to have a baby. And that's that.

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