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summersareknives · 1 year

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hi ess! <3 im back🕺

ur so right the universe ships wolfstar. i also saw regulus when stargazing but he was too far away from sirius to be in the picture💔 one day reg, one day.

ALSO happy late lily evans day <3 cant believe i missed her bday. rip lily u wouldve loved taylor swift❤️

tay time! mr perfectly fine, message in a bottle, & last kiss <3

chat time!

i dont think i could force myself to sit through dwd, ive learned enough abt it via osmosis and thats enough for me tbh.

THEY SERIOUSLY DO TAKE PICS OF TREES AND CLOUDS!! it baffles me. like sure maybe the clouds looked particularly nice and i understand that canada has some big ass trees but be fr. also i swear someone was taking a pic of a fucking pigeon once.

ur so right id also lose my mind over a red sock in my laundry. i think thatd be the final straw for me.

i think i have to agree ben barnes' smile in podg is very sirius. dorian gray IS sirius in the same way paul from dune is reg. no joke i almost called paul regulus to my dad the other day. not my finest moment❤️

godspeed on ur exam, u got this💪 drunk procrastinators never lose.

I DID SEE THAT VIDEO OF THE PERSON BITING THE TERRYS ORANGE!! i swear ive never been so mad before. also toblerone def is an essential drunk snack for sure.

that moment sounds so sweet, and it was raining too????? thats literally perfect. no matter how hard i could try i know liv would never dance to jazz w me. definitely considering revoking her best friend status right about now. but its fine because i know shed dance w me to taylor and 1d so that makes up for it <3

geoguessr can be so hard sometimes especially when its in america. like i swear unless its a city with signs i can never get it. like how am i supposed to know that this big ass field was kentucky and not fucking iowa.

L best friends for the win!!!!!! but ur right they lucked out too cause we're incredibly cool so good for them<3

maybe one day my negative rizz will pay off but ur right. until then i'll kick back with my wine & books & fanfics cause thats all i need in life. & damn cursing victoria to fail her exams, u know what thats so valid she deserves it.

likeafunerall's art is SO GOOD. so good. im obsessed with her character designs theyre just so perfect. and omg yes u should totally put them up on ur wall itll look so good. AND YES I SAW THE SOLDIER POET KING ART!!! its so good i cant. likeafunerall never misses.

I SAW THAT APPLETV AD YESTERDAY! i was freaking out like i swear appletv is doing this on purpose.

work song is simply so good. id KILL to see hozier live and for him to perform that song.

if i talk to caesar ill let u know. he was stabbed ~23 times so id say thats on par with a jesus style betrayal (esp since brutus was his close friend) rip julius i do hope u got a lil kiss before they maimed u<3

is alex turner psychic??? thats so funny.

omg not the famous 1975 concert featuring taylor swift.....id be utterly heartbroken. and right?? harry canada exists too u know..... i had tickets to love on tour before covid but then it was cancelled and then he fully REMOVED THE SHOW when he started touring again and now the closest one is in america. sorry harry but i dont love u enough to go to america.

dressing in red and gold is so gryffindor of u. i wear a lot of green so that tracks ig.

dw cruel summer will forever be my fav scream-at-the-top-of-ur-lungs song. its just perfect. dbm simply isnt that kind of song.

omg only ch2 of cr.... i am praying for u . but dont worry its SO good. like yes its heartbreaking but so worth it. i honestly miss the earlier chapters everything was so simple </3

rome is definitely the city of piss and gladiators. i guess not much has changed since antiquity !!

when people are blocking the hall and im just done with them i usually take it upon myself to barrel through them or give them dirty looks (sorry people but i have places to be MOVEW PLEASE)

two middle names is so cool u have options. u can change it up whenever u want u know.

UNCLE MOONY :((((((((

winter <3 and yes i hate when people call it fall. like autumn is such a pretty word. fall is literally so lame . so many people call it fall here and i hate it. its autumn!!!!!!! >:(

good luck on ur chem exam !! telepathically sending all my academic energy to u rn. dont forget to channel the patron saint of academic achievement, remus lupin. AND FUCK PHYSICS!!!!!

coins are so cool. i have one from Iran from 1950 that i got in my change from kfc and its so cool. and a paddington coin??? omg thats so cute.

unicorns and phoenixes are so cool fr. & u know who to call if u ever get bit by a basilisk!

bookstore dates are ideal fr. but only if the other person likes books (but also red flag if they dont......i am not wasting my time on someone who doesnt like books)

stealing money from the bank in monopoly is so real. i used to bribe the banker whenever i got desperate and it never ended well. and yes learn chess!! its so fun and it makes u feel smart.

yes van gogh recreations! she is so cool tbh. now if only i inherited even an ounce of her artistic ability and maybe id be satisfied. and cafe terrace at night is just so pretty. so peaceful and serene. i can imagine quiet jazz playing in the street while u look up at the stars. its so pretty.

OH NOOO sorry abt ur bio exam☹️ (<-girl what the hell is that i justwanted to use an emoji.....anyways) hope ur chem exam goes better!! & bakery + taylor is very good combo. proven to cure all ails.

and omg ur so right. picking out books for each other and then annotating them??? that is SO CUTE!!!!! SO CUTE! u get me.

hozier is completely in my bones too he lives there. i wanna get a hozier tattoo someday too he consumes me fr.

i love being a sports anti!! (badminton ur on thin fucking ice. )

yes proud italian over here🇮🇹💪 i love pasta sm. and omg portuguese?? thats so cool. ive always wanted to visit portugal. ive never actually had portuguese food & i really wanna try it now.

reg is SUCH a black cat. & james absolutely sings horribly in the shower and everyone is so tired of him. sirius prob does too but remus secretly loves it <3 jily night owl-early bird has my heart fr. also the james never getting hungover hc is so funny like Yes. he would get blackout drunk and then wake up at the asscrack of dawn the next day for quidditch practice, thank u.

dorlene forever. sorry peter but those women are gay. and idk how to feel abt reg/remus. ig if its written well its not bad but it feels almost wrong. at least their ship name (moonwater i think) is kinda cute.

i agree the patronuses are quite slytherin but def also ravenclaw (i have gotten ravenclaw multiple times when i take the test so ig thats my secondary house)

luna <3 shes just so cool and i love her funky sense of style.

yes dairy queen is ice cream! but also burgers and stuff too. but theyre known for their ice cream which is so good. if u ever visit north america i recommend.

omg barrs cream soda!!!! ive had that before from a lil british food shop i found & it was so good. better than canadian cream soda for sure.

q review:

this is me trying is so real. burnt out gifted kid syndrome hits like a truck.

omg a black swan that is so cool!! mysterious and shit fr.

my tears ricochet is such a good choice (& cruel summer) it hits every damn time.

ooo shapeshifting very good choice. just think of all the places u could get into by shapeshifting, celeb a-list parties?? the oscars?? buckingham palace?? ur set for life.

messy is so valid & i hate losing socks so mcuh like actually where the fuck did they go.

omg SMARTIES!!!!! i love smarties so much. they dont have them in america and i pity them. jaffa cakes are so good too.

shakespeare is such a good choice hes so cool. to meet The genius himself would be a dream.

work song FOREVERRRR

i love these hype songs. excellent hype vibes.

SNOW!! i love making snowmen sm. its actually snowing here as i type. idk what happened to the 10degree weather but yeah.

lady macbeth and macbeth !!!!! i love this. and omg i was OBSESSED with it in 2017 like OBSESSED. lemme try and guess who's who here.....u have said lu was taller than u so were u georgie? hoping im right.

answering qs:

fuck marlene, marry lily, kill pandora. i love pandora so much but i cant pass up an opportunity with marlene. sorry pandora <3

fuck reg, marry evan, kill barty. i think im too similar to reg to wanna marry him (although he is very wealthy.....) & evan seems like good marriage material so. also killing barty bc its funny.

what i like to spend my money on: mostly clothes and jewelry. and candles sometimes. omg and books how could i forget!!

inside joke with liv: we've got this dumb little handshake we've had since literally forever that we call the bunnyfish (long story, idek how to begin explaining it) im the bunny shes the fish. ive been trying to convince her to get matching bunny and fish tattoos FOREVER but to no success. ill get there someday!!

weird fear: maybe more of an irrational fear but i cannot lean against car doors while theyre moving cause what if it opens and i fall out on to the road and die. like what if. it plagues my life fr.

weirdest dare ive ever done: tbh i cant even remember. i usually pick truth cause my friends can be EVIL and i will not subject myself to their dares. they're never creative enough with their truth questions so its always something dumb like "darkest secret" or "who do u like"

worst impulse buy: luckily nothing huge, but i impulse buy random shit like nail polish or lipstick all the time. i have yet to buy something i fully regret but im sure the day will come!

fav quote ever: AHH okay this is such a good question. my absolute fav is from anne carson's an oresteia:

“Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.”

something about someone wanting to take care of u even when ur at ur worst just KILLS ME. RIPS me apart.

9. fav quote from a fic: this is a basic answer but i really love that line in atyd about james having an ego the size of a lake but a heart to match it. just <3 yes. i love that man so much. theres also a bunch of lines in just lovers by zar that are taken from little women that just kill me every time i read.

10. ever met a celeb: ive never spoken to any but i DID walk past seth rogen like a month ago. and i saw john mulaney with olivia munn over this past summer too it was jarring.

11. fav snack: theres this snack mix i love called humpty dumpty party mix and its SO good. (the cheese one specifically) its got mini pretzels and doritos and puffy cheetos and crunchy cheetos and these little cheesy hoop things in it and its delicious.

12. crush on anyone: (dw ur good i dont mind!) not atm! i think my standards are too high bc of fictional characters and celebs so people irl always pale in comparison. like if ur not james potter or lily evans or sirius black im not wasting my time its simple.

13. who knows me best: definitely liv. she is as much a part of me as i am of her and we can read each others minds. also my dad, im almost a carbon copy of him cause we have the same interests and sense of humour .

14. lover vs getaway car: lover. the hopeless romantic in me had to. i love getaway car but its gonna have to be lover <3

15. all time favourite moment: visiting italy and greece was a dream come true cause ive always wanted to visit since i was a little kid. since it was a school trip i was with my friends and liv ofc and i had the time of my life. seeing the parthenon irl and the colosseum in rome changed the trajectory of my life fr.

16. fav moment with liv: ive got many but one specific one thats really special to me was when i came out to her & fine line by harry styles was playing & she almost crashed the car cause she was crying (WITH HAPPINESS LOL) it was very funny. that song has a special place in my heart bc of that <3 i also love when we go for late night drives and blast music. or when when we go to the beach at sunset with a bottle of wine>>>

17. r(egg) vs r(edge): im a r(redge) truther idc. i know his name is rEGulus but i am Not calling him r(egg) it sounds like EGG!!!!! r(edge) forever.

18. languages: sadly english is the only one i fluently speak. i know some italian but im not fluent (i blame my dad, whos literally from italy but didnt fucking teach me his language. wtf man) i also know some spanish and very very minimal french. i can read basic norwegian as well(i was obsessed with SKAM in 2015 so i had to learn some) BUT in terms of reading, i can read ancient greek and a bit of latin. also aurebesh which is a writing system from star wars (massive fucking nerd alert)

qs for u!

fuck marry kill evan reg barty

fuck marry kill pandora lily marlene

how many languages do u speak?

fav gemstone/crystal/stone?

have u watched the new last of us show? (if u havent u should its SO good)

sea, forest, or mountains?

what was ur dream job when u were a kid?

whats a topic u could talk for hours about?

celeb crush(es)?

spotify or apple music? (or other if u dont use these)

fav constellation?

fav memory with lu?

whats one food u have always wanted to try?

thats all for now! if u see this before u take ur exam GOOD LUCK!!!! u got this. if u see this after i hope it went well. either way remus would be proud <3

-bee

bee beee beeeeeee !!!! <33333

“too far away from sirius to be in the picture.” fuck fuck fuck this is the cause of my DEATH. i died and this is why. (pls one day catch them in a pic together. one of us shall do this. new mission.)

I KNOW HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST MILF EVER <33333 (did you see theinvisiblemuseum’s fanart of lily ???? it’s so fucking good ???) & you’re right she would’ve so loved taylor swift (can imagine her dancing to lover with james)

tay tay <333

mr perfectly fine - JEGULUS - this song is fucking jegulus after they break up and regulus is all ‘you promised. you promised. you promised’ ‘Mr. "Leaves me all alone, " I fall apart// It takes everything in me just to get up each day’ IT’S LITERALLY HIMMMM. he left and regulus fucking shattered this is the TRUTH.

message in a bottle - JEGULUS - i’m thinking a celebrity au jegulus where they like date secretly or james is a fanboy then gets famous and reg writes a track for James’s movie (??? fic idea alert) AND I’M SO YES. THE MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE IS SUCH A REGULUS THING TO DO , TOO . (mr rab in a locket)

last kiss - JEGULUS / WOLFSTAR - this matches perfectly for both of them - except more wolfstar because in canon i think reg would’ve definitely known that they’d have a last kiss. and remus was the one who would’ve trusted him and all that shit. (and hello?? remus would so fuckin dance for sirius this is canon?? and wear his clothes after he’s in azkaban . )

fic rec for u (did i forget last time ?? i will not do this again , ‘tis a crime) - pink lemonade by moonysbookshelff (ft jegulus wolfstar rosekiller , with ace evan , and a happy ending , and also it’s a celeb au!!)

chatting !!!!

no because i’ve heard far too much of harry’s englishman accent when he’s yelling in some speech to sit through 2hrs of that shit.

“kids look this is a souvenir pic i took many years ago from my trip to london , the city of fashion & vibes.” “that’s a fucking pigeon mom.” (not a fucking pigeon why the fucking pigeon. no please no.)

but tbh pink is my favourite colour …. but i have too many shirts and trousers that i’d lose my mind to see as pink. so no thanks , no red socks today!!

YES OMG !!! podg ben barnes = sirius & dune tim = regulus !!!! this is canon major fucking canon !!!!!!!!! (it’s the smile and the facial expressions.) AND CALLING PAUL REGULUS THAT’S A CLOSE ONE . they might’ve found out the depths of your insanity then !!

yes yes godspeed but i did medium well on it. like everyone’s yapping on about the last q on the exam which they got like ‘4.35’ and i got 190 so idk. that’s like 2 marks i lost right then and there!!!

that lady should be arrested for war crimes. it was madness i tell you, MADNESS.

taylor and 1D over jazz , but you gotta try the jazz thing at least once. at least. it feels surreal, i’m telling you. this liz sounds so fucking cool high five to us dude we won the lottery of best friends.

wdym you didn’t know it was kentucky??? was there not a fucking colonel sanders standing right there ??? COLONEL SANDERS FOR THE WIN (i love kfc!) . this what i’m saying all fields look the same i can’t fuckin differentiate.

L & E // L & B —- > best motherfucking friends you will ever find ever. got the ‘married by 40’ pact with my dude too.

wine & books & fanfic > actual romantic satisfaction. alwaysssss. (i do not like her anymore. she’s consdescending as fuck. what the fuck do u mean ‘can’t believe u dk what a processor blah blah computer shit thingy is ??’ BITCH CAN U TELL ME WHAT A FUCKING KETONE IS ???? i thought not.)

i’m so obsessed with likeafuneralls art. she’s drawn the first art of xenophilius lovegood i’ve ever seen and looking at it i was like ‘damn now i understand how pandora got locked down.’ ALRIGHT OKAY THEY’LL GO UP ON MY WALLS NOW. (you’re literally so right likeafunerall literally never misses her art is fucking ETHEREAL.)

IK IK THEY ARE . ESPECIALLY THE TIMMY AND GARY OLDMAN THING I WAS LIKE ‘SIRIUS AND REG SIRIUSANDREG.’ this like when andrew and ben barnes met (have u seen that photo pls say yes it’s life changing as fuck.)

me too i really want to go to a fuckin hozier concert i rlly think my life would be changed. like it would be.

on a slightly related note- have u seen the jesusxjudas edits??? they’re fr making me all emotional like damn jesus knew and he was all ‘fine I sacrifice myself if u kiss me u lil bitch’ . & yes i hope brutus gave him a little eye contact at the very least. like something intense.

HE IS PSYCHIC. I swear it. i love it.

i was so fuckin heartbroken it was unreal and my heart was a bunch of tosh for like three days. harry thinks only usa exists . like hello??? what abt canada ?? AHAT ABOUT YOUR ROOTS??? ENGLAND ??? LONDON??? MANCHESTER??? I don’t care about u enough to go to the usa for u (i’d only do that for ZAYN.)

we dress like our houses as we should (currently in red pjs because it’s 9:00am and my exam is at 1:30 so i don’t have to leave until like 12:30.)

cruel summer just fuckin hits right yk??? it just does it’s like i ascend to heaven . ( ‘GRINNING LIKE A DEVIL’ is my national anthem fr)

😀😀😀😀 i’m very scared now ! very ! but i shall power through because i am no stranger to pain! yay!

piss & gladiators ong. that’s such a funny sentence though fr ‘piss and gladiators’ .

next time i’ll deck them in their motherfuckin faces. not kidding. was nearly late to my exam because of them. but I’ll just give them detention because as a higher-up , i can do that! so very good!! college student gives the lil bitches in the corridors detention !! more at 7!

yessss i can switch it up. when i get lu to pick me up and i’m taking a lil too long to get ready he just full names me and i’m THERE. but ess is good for me honestly it’s all smooth and stuff.

UNCLE MOONY :((((( (*sobs*)

IT’S AUTUMN. AUTUMN . this is truth. nothing else is true but this. (winter is bae.)

AHHHHH THANK U SM !!!!!! I AM GRACIOUSLY ACCEPTING THIS ENERGY OH MY GODDDD. i will challenge mr lupin through myself i will. (fuck physics !!)

just be loyal to dumpydumpster and fawkes will come through !!! (unicorns & phoenixes 5ever!!)

nah this is so real of u don’t waste ur time on non-book lovers book lovers only pls and thank u everyone else fuck off you aren’t good enough.

stealing money from the bank yesssss. hut unfortunately lu is the banker and he’s just as competitive so he will not budge AT. ALL. all right this friday i’m getting lu to teach me that’s it.

cafe terrace at night walk by with your bf/gf and hold their hand and ahhh melttttt . And jazz would so be a part of this experience i agree !!!

I AM ALSO SORRY ABOUT MY BIO EXAM. but i put something down for every q and that’s a fuckin achievement. honestly . the brownie was vv good plus a walk and taylor , solved so many of my problems honestly.

WE GOTTA FIND SOMEONE TO DO THIS WITH ISTG. annotating books with shi like ‘you’d do this’ making me cry and that.

hozier is me. i is him. we are one. imagine having a song written about u by hozier. like i’d straight up keel over and DIE.

Sports suck !! (badminton and sometimes cricket watching me . and also lu. )

AHAHA ITALIAN YESSSS. portugal is fucking amazing . there’s a little church up in portugal (sanctuary of out lady fatima) and it’s my peace place honestly . feeling so much less worry when i’m there. if u go to portugal that is a must!!! AND so is algarve. algarve is also home <333 I miss it now :) THE FOOD IS AMAZING , YESSS!!! you must try pastel de nata !!! (egg custard tarts!!!) i really love them they’re so fucking good.

REG AS A BLACK CAT IS THE ONLY HC THAT MATTERS HONESTLY. I love it so so much. and james as a horrible shower singer ???? canon fr. (i adore jily night owl/early bird so fucking much it’s like a release i adore it so much they had that for a little while at least!) JAMES HAS MAGICAL POWERS FR FR !!!! i wish i had them too damn me with headaches and shit.

yes they’re lesbians if i’ve ever seen them. and moonWATER???? that’s fucking HARSH ??? (i’d read a oneshot maybe. maybe.)

my secondary house is slytherin !!! and oh my god that’s literally so cool i just have the one patronus!!

luna luna luna i’m just as sane as her she gets me fr.

I’m literally so jealous of so many American restaurants. i want dairy queen now damn. if i ever come there i will go to dairy queen and i’m very excited for that.

barrs cream soda is literally bae it’s so good (though it used to be 39p and now it’s 59p ???? rip off asf but i’d still buy it )

i’m an ex-gifted kid now try-hard

IK IT IS MYSTERIOUS AS FUCK

mtr kills me . i’m in a battlefield every time i hear that song fr. (cruel summer is a close second <33)

one second i am timmy tim at the oscars next i am one of the queen’s corgis!!!!! the opportunities are endless

they went into the fucking vacuum of the earth or something where else WHY DOES IT HAPPEN. WHY DO YOU GO. STAY???

smarties and jaffa cakes >>> shitty american chocolate

it would be a dream. I have so many questions and he’s the only one who could ever answer that.

work song. work song. work song.

THEY GET ME ALL BOPPING WHILE I’M GETTING DRESSED AND STUFF.

it’s SNOWING??? lucky asf tell me if it’s enough for a snowman at the very least.

WE THOUGHT WE WERE SO SMART BECAUSE WE KNOW MACBETH BY HEART having studied it and all!! (AND I KNEW YOU’D GUESS THAT. i was it & he was georgie and that’s what was so funny because he’s taller so him wearing a yellow raincoat and with the red balloon and stuff it was so funny. and i was the creepy fucking clown but he was still funnier because imagine a tall blonde georgie like DAMN. )

reviewing q’s -

marlene would treat you right. I just know she would.

marry him for the money!!! marrying evan is a good choice too though (killing barty for the win!!!)

clothes and books and candles and jewellery YESSS GIRL AS YOU SHOULD JAZZ YOURSELF UP.

liv better step up and get that tattoo. you guys are the bunnyfish it’s practically illegal not to get that tattoo.

no same honestly i’m a second away from my death i could be rolling on the ground and die in a few second fr you’re so valid for this.

picking truth forever yessss >>>> (i’ve picked dare but i’m playing with lu so it’s always stuff like ‘i dare u to eat a spoonful of ketchup’ like damb boy you can do better.)

i buy nail polish and lipstick from poundland and primark all the time. literally it’s an addiction because i think buying them for a pound is a good deal . but then i buy like 20 of them and suddenly i’m a hoarder. (special mention to my buys of the royal butter and the toblerone!)

THIS QUOTE. OH MY GOD THIS QUOTE THIS QUOTE . killing me opening me helaing me and killing me. someone loving u like this is all u fucking need fr >>>

james potter has an ego the size of a lake but a heart to match. mskingbean knew what she was doing fr . I LIVE FOR LITTLE WOMEN REFERENCES IN FICS OMG I’M ACTUALLY WRITING ONE AS WE SPEAK.

i’ve never met a celebrity so that’s annoying. wlaking past seth rogen??? so casually??? i’d be screaming and stuff. seeing john mulaney and olivia munn must be jarring actually. i’m jarred rn. like wdym they sit around eating lunch like me??

this sounds so funny ‘humpty dumpty party mix’ dying dead. but also i want to eat it sounds really fucking good and such a range of cuisine in there seriously.

no this is so real of u. I don’t crush on anyone except for fictional characters who real humans will never ever live up to.

ahhhhhhhhh liv knowing you bestttt that’s peak platonic soulmatism!!!! (your dad sounds so cool 2 fr) i get that sm because lu knows me best and that’s honestly peak knowing someone that well .

lover’s my first dance song, but it depends on what mood i’m in. sometimes i need to feel like a criminal, and at that point it’s getaway car. but rn it’s lover. in a very lover mood atm.

AHHHHH OH MY GOD THAT’S SO COOL AHHHHHHHHH SEEING THE PARTHENON??? I wanna see it too DAMN.

coming out while driving yesssss because they have to keep driving. (And to Harry styles??? double cool??) for me it was lu that figured it out . he was like damn you a bisexual. (obviously more deep but this is very much the gist of it) LONG DRIVES WITH MUSIC AND WINE AND SUNSET OH MY GODDDDDDD . DREAM.

u chose the right answer. like idc as a brit , which is where regulus is from , i say r(edge) so it’s redge. DONE. (although if anyone else says it it doesn’t matter ALL that much. )

listen i watched friends and i think ‘va fa a napoli’ is a swear ??? confirmation pls ??? I TRIED TO LEARN SWEDISH FOR THIS EXACT REASON OMG. because i was obsessed with young royals but i only did one lesson. my brain said no! i did 6 years of french , have a french fluent best friend and still can’t speak it properly. such a pain honestly. (that’s such a cute lil nerdy thing to do tho damn girl u get that excited???? go learn your star wars language YES DO IT!!!) (AHHH U CAN READ ANCIENT GREEK ??? MA’AM THAT’S SO COOL.)

q’s for me —->

fuck evan marry reg kill barty. i am a gold digger. that’s all. and barty because he did stuff to alive and frank and if it comes to choosing i shall bring that up unfortunately .

marry lily fuck marlene kill pandora (sorry pandora sorry u don’t deserve it) lily evans is WIFEY. she is wife she is mother i am hers and she is mine. love her.

My time to shine as a polyglot.

portuguese

gujrati

hindi

urdu

marathi

bsl

i am fluent in all of the above but i also speak punjabi a lil and also know braille english , but apparently that’s not a language so i can’t use it.

4. topaz cool as shit. so topaz , but also obsidian and amethyst (birthstone alert!!)

5. i have not ! however I saw a quote of it on my dash (‘you were my purpose’) so now i will watch it !! very excited for it !!!

6. forest. could be lovely there with picnics and shit. i’ve had a forest picnic and i’ve been fine so forest. not sea because i won’t betray reg , and not mountains because i cannot climb !!!

7. weirdly enough a hairdresser 💀💀💀 wtf was up in my head??? i used to think the cutting and dyeing hair was so cool and i really wanted to do it until i was like 9. then i got some sense knocked into me.

8. cancer 💀💀i did my epq (which is like a dissertation of sorts) on this and i still remember everything and honestly it’s so sad and so much but i could talk about it for ages. BUT ON A HAPPIER NOTE !!! I COULD TALK ABOUT PLATONIC SOULMATISM FOR HOURS !!!!!! HOW A FRIEND LIEK THAT IS SO SO IMPORTANT THAN HAVING A BILLION FRIENDS WHO WON’T EVEN KNOWN YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR !!!!

9. timothée chalamet & louis partridge ( i love timmy for obvious reasons & i could so treat louis better than his grandma ass girlfriend come here bb) ALSO FLORENCE AND ZENDAYA (but I don’t want tom to bite my thumb off for simping after his gf)

10.APPLE MUSIC !!!!! APPLE MUSIC FOREVER AND EVER ARE YOU KIDDING ???? dolby atmos just does somrthing to my ears.

11.canis major !!! very sirius of me but canis major !!! love it and i can tell which star is sirius right away. but draco is a close second !!!

12.well u know about the dancing jazz . so i’ll pick another one (hard to choose damn) i took him with me to a wedding as my date (fake of course because of the family asking do u have a bf yet do u have a bf yet) and he was the white boy there and he was wearing a tux and he was so innocent and everything he ate was so spicy he nearly cried but he powered through and when he came out on the dance floor he DID THE DANCE BETTER THAN ME???? how dare he??????? and he was so nice to all my family who kept calling him ‘gora’ (white boy) even though he fully knew what that meant . like he did all that and he bought a toaster to gift to them as well. it was something else and i will always remember that. BUT ALSO I HAVE ANOTHER WEDDING COMING UP SOON (start of march) AND I’M TAKING HIM AS MY FAKE DATE AGAIN !!!! hoping he’s built his spice tolerance up , but i shall update u soon on whether he has or not.

13. i really fucking want wingstop. like so badly. I would fly to the us for that shit i just WANT ONE CHOMP ON THAT STUFF. it looks so fucking good and life changing like damn come in my mouth bb. And also birria tacos. i need to try that asap it looks so good i could cry.

q’s for u -

something u could talk about for hours?

worst advice you’ve ever given?

worst advice you’ve ever taken?

if u were a periodic table element which one would u be ?

what’s your undercover spy name ?

do you prefer savoury or sweet?

Who’s your favourite friend (from the tv show)?

3 wishes ??

how long are u surviving in a zombie apocalypse?

favourite stone ?

fave constellation ?

weirdest dream ?

worst dream?

best dream ?

timothée chalamet or ben barnes ?

things u eat at the movies ?

last text you sent?

last text you got ?

phone calls or text messages ?

what greek tragedy hero are u ? (this is a quiz & i got orpheus !)

And what’s your favourite meme ? I must know this?

(beeeeee beeee thank u for being such a lovely human !!! come back soon !!! i will miss u and i’m seeing this before the exam , so i’m chanelling all my remus Lupin energy into this. thank u for the luck , i wish u luck in life <3333 come back soon dont be too long !!! )

#ess waters a plant #bee <33 #ess’s marauders x ts crossover

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blackgirl0nline · 4 years

Text

Okay so when writing "Dating _____ would include" type posts my mind tends towards understanding the character and their psyche. So this started off mostly fluff and got psychological and I'm sorry :'(

Dating Bruce Banner (Hulk) Would Include

super smart big brain boi

Hed be the type to always be teaching you something

"Hey honey come here? Did you know the residuals of melting points are often too great to predict..." and hed just ramble on and get invested and rant about something hes interested in. With such animated features as he explains the thing that hes finally wrapped his mind around

teasing him for being a smartypants would he just *chefs kiss*

"mhmhmhm yes sir professor banner sir I totally know what you mean when you talk about the disassociating particular movement of theoretical transkineiontal matter and the implications of which have temporal ramifications. That's clear as cristial doc"

[[MORE]]

teasingly calling him "Doctor" or "Doctor Banner" and him blushing everytime because you praising his intelligence is genuinely the biggest compliment. Because sure he knows he's smart but you finding him sexy for being smart is the bees knees. Like the fact that you dont see him as some genius freakazoid with no life beyond the lab is something he cherishes. Even if you mean it jokingly

DID SOMEONE SAY PRAISE KINK BC I- dr banner owns that shit

At first hes very shy about it, saying you're flattering him, because hes particularly unsure of himslelf when equations aren't involved.

But he eventually warms up to accepting compliments gratefully and with a bit of a shy smile especially around other people.

But he also gives praise right back

Honestly dont see him being too big on nicknames. Just calls you by your full first name because hes like ew old. Unless everyone calls you by the short version because he isn't like that spicy

And that's the thing hes literally not *that* kinky because hes a tad bit boring. Like not tok many secret desires running around his head

literally steal his glasses he's very blind. Or at least exaggerates it for your amusement.

All the cuddles

So many cuddles

Cuddles for days. Where hes wrapping his big arms around you just to feel like hes keeping you protected and safe like nothing could hurt you

Falling asleep to his gentle breathing

If you have trouble sleeping hed totally read to you till you fall asleep. Usually he'd wanna read some of his science-y books so he doesn't fall behind on research + he knows you find it boring so its kind of a double whammy

Will totally read game of thrones if that's what you prefer or YA or fucking Caillou because anything to help you sleep

He loves giving forhead kisses

Will literally go along with anything like a big baby. And he loves the fun and quirkinessTM you bring like a spark of joy. He just doesn't know what hes getting on any given day.

Yall balance each other out. But when you're helping to calmn him down that's when he loves you the most

When you're his peace his respite from the world that's amazing

Hanging out with you after a stress filled day and you just kiss the top if his head and talk to him softly and hold him. That's why he loves you

You can be high energy but also there for him when he needs to not hulk out and its genuinely so lovely.

Oml hes so shy tho.

Like being around people can just stress him out. It has to be his freinds.

That's why hes so thankful for you because you dont force anything on him the moment he doesn't seem comfortable yall take a moment to slow down

But dont treat him like glass either. He won't break. He hates when people just walk on eggshells around him. It makes him feel uncomfortable like hes inconvencing everyone.

The thing is hes kind of a complicated guy

Like yeah hes shy and all. Because hes insecure because of the other guy + having to keep track of social cues and not trying to sound like an old boring professor and not trying to sound condescending and trying to understand pop cultural references and it's too much at once and gets him frustrated so hed rather stay out of it

But he genuinely is too much in his head. The more mentally isolated he becomes the more he just rominates in his thoughts the more his temper gets short.

Like make no doubt he has anger issues

Genuinely he gets so frustrated with himself and sometimes itll come off as rude or curt

But hes mostly projecting it at himself or his work

That's why he spend hours in the lab. Hes so stubborn and harsh against himself that he won't let himself off the hook.

But is dangerous the more and more he gets in the habit of just being in his own head and critisising himself the more and more he gets distant with everyone else and sometimes rubs ppl the wrong way or comes off as a guy with a major attitude

"Hey Bruce do you-"

"I'm busy." Without turning around or contextualizing it

You physically have to get in his face.

But you run the risk of an outburst. Hes snapped at coworkers before. Never at you. Most of the time he recognizes "oh this is someone I love and dont want to fuck up a relationship with" and slowly decompresses

Once he comes to his senses is out of his head and calms tf down and stops being mad at himself hes just your big ol teddy

"Hey sorry I didnt mean to be so mean... what's going on?" Small smile on his lips eyes shining because he cherishes you

You roll your eyes because of his mood swings but will soften because you know hes just like that

Yall might get into arguments

I cannot lie. He cant be a perfect boy all the time. But think of it this way, hes stubborn and intelligent and self critical and bipolar and his internal mechanism to deal with stress is to turn it into frustration then anger then get big and green and wreck shit. So when hes frustrated with you (usually about you not agreeing with how much he works) he might not want to aquess to you. He might wanna stand his ground and demand you hear his side. Because in that moment hes justified and he knows that he's correct.

And you have to just eventually get that arguing with him won't work hes too stubborn sometimes. If hes arguing its only because its something he thinks it's worth arguing over. Just learn to de-escalate and you'll get him to be reasonable on anything

He can be hella condescending. A guy with 7phds doesn't do so withought thinking hes pretty smart. But you treating him like hes stupid ticks him off. Dont treat him like an idiot.

Or a kid. Just because hes awkward you dont have to use that against him. Teasing him for being a bit antisocial or teasing his bad social skills can be a reason for a real fight to break out.

And it really is a clear escalation you can see how he rises in anger. So most of the time it's easy to spot it, orient yourself and stop it

His social akwardnes is helped by the avengers, people like Tony help him socialise and get outside the lab and talk to people. Tony helps him communicate through difficult problems that usually leave Bruce frustrated with himslef

You and Tony are two pronged. He calls you in when he thinks Bruce needs a break and you entrust Tony with making sure Bruce isn't burning out.

Them being science bros goes deeper then you know. They help each other out. Bruce forces him to collaborate more by covering the things Tony isn't an expert in. And he's a voice of reason in some cases.

Bruce can be very level headed when hes not stuck in his own. He'll tell Tony what's going too far. The only issue is that Tony won't always listen. You and Pepper are about the only two people who can force Tony to listen to Bruce's prudent scienc-y advice

They both respect each other immensely for their intellect. But both can be bull headed. Tony doesn't like working with other because that means he has to admit he isn't really the smartest guy in the room. And Bruce doesn't hate working with others but when he doesn't feel heard or feels used or dejected he can get frustrated and snappy

The fact that you're still around despite all his bad qualities makes you that much more loveable to him.

#Bruce Banner #bruce banner x reader #hulk #hulk x reader #avengers preferances #imagine

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lysdal · 7 years

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tagged by @rick-wrights-right-nipple q; thanks <3

LASTS:

Drink: tomato soup :)

Last phone call: with my mom asking when they’d get home again

Last text message: girlfriend q:

Last song listened to: røde mor - kys din frø really getting into old danish protest and psychedelic rock q:

Last time you cried: yesterday i think, dont remember

HAVE YOU EVER:

Dated someone twice? nope

Been cheated on? well.. no, not really

Kissed someone and regretted it? yeah... definitely. i assume both of us have just forgotten it though

Lost someone special? grandparent, knew her very well though

Been depressed? i dont know, never been checked by a doctor

Been drunk and thrown up? ofc :’) threw up in my hair resulting in it being sticky the day after. (also managed to puke and then faceplant into it later :’))

Talked to someone named Tom? no, not yet

IN THE PAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

Made a new friend? yeah :)

Fallen out of love? definitely :’) much has happend this year though, i feel it was necessary to shape me, so i dont go around being sad about the time i ‘wasted’

Laughed until you cried? always. if its worth laughing about itll probably make me laugh until tears come lmao

Met someone who changed you? i guess you could say that, yeah q; <33

Found out who your true friends were? already knew who those people were

Found out someone was talking about you? not really

GENERAL:

How many people on Tumblr do you know in real life? 4 people :)

Do you have any pets? sadly no ;( i did have a bird sometime, he was pretty cute

Do you want to change your name? maybe my last name, but not my first name, its pretty okay q:

What time did you wake up this morning? at 11 or 13 i think, its vacation so i dont keep track

What were you doing last night? just talked to a nice person q;

Name something you cannot wait for? meeting up with my girlfriend q: it has been what ive been looking forward to for a pretty long while now

What getting on your nerves right now? pretty much nothing, maybe a couple of ‘friends’ at school but not too much.

Blood type: im pretty sure its 0-

Nickname: lysdal (yah, username is creative i know)

Relationship status: post minecraft sex, but still no hand holding yet

Zodiac sign: aries (horoscopes seem to fit so im pretty happy with it)

Prounouns: whatever you want to call me, swamp monster included

Favorite tv show: futurama so far :)

College major: no ideaaa

Hair color: dark brown, getting darker i think

Long or short: long definitely q:

Do you have a crush on someone? well that person would be my girlfriend 🤔 is it still a crush then

What do you like about yourself? if i really want to do something i can focus on it, and do it. i suppose thats quite good. i also play guitar and bass okay. my curiosity seems to drag me around in a lot of hobbies, so thats also nice.

FIRSTS:

Surgery: had a splinter 1 cm deep under my nail :’) the doctor just took a pair of pliers and ripped it out nearly alongside with my nail :’)

Piercing: i once fell and pierced my own head, but no intentional ones, and im not too sure ill ever get any

Best friend: eh.. my middle school best friend didnt really turn out like me, so we stopped talking pretty much as soon as we stopped going to school together

Sport: volleyball :’) for 3 years :’) never againnn

Vacation: hungary when i was 2 years old, i remember the trip by car being wayyyy too long z.z

Pair of sneakers: never had any i think

NOW:

Eating: protein rods aka breadsticks

Drinking: pepsiii 💦💦

I’m about to: go to work because ive been postphoning it whole week

Listening: an 8 hour long video of joel playing half life 2 👍

WANTS:

Kids: later in life, yeah

Get married: unless the social norms change, yeah

Career: i wish i knew :’) maybe music if thats possible, probably not though

WHICH IS BETTER:

Lips or eyes? eyess 👀, lips are still pretty tho :)

Hugs or kisses? both are very nice :) especially together q:

Shorter or taller? preferably shorter, but thats because anyone taller than me would surely have back problems z.z

Older or younger? same age, maybe a bit younger, depends on how mature the person is though

Romantic or spontaneous? romantic definitely q:

Sensitive or loud? depends on what mood im in, both can be nice

Hook up or relationship? relationship 100%, hook ups seem rather pointless for stuff other than self confidence

Trouble maker or hesitant? hesitant when theres risk, trouble maker if there isnt :’)

HAVE YOU EVER:

Kissed a stranger: neverr, kissing is more precious than that

Drank hard liquor: you bet, currently the strongest stuff ive tried was 80% alcohol modern absinthe, but im still looking out for stronger stuff :’) why not try it all if i can.

Lost glasses/contacts: dont have either

Sex on first date: if its with a person like rick wright maybe 👀 i mean.. its a once in a lifetime opportunity.. generally no though :’) if you like the person that much then whats the rush, there will definitely be more dates.

Broken someone’s heart: nooo z.z never done that and i hope i never will

Been arrested: noo, but i once slapped a police officers ass in the amsterdam airport when i was younger :’) was too young to get arrested though, and the police officer didnt mind

Turned someone down: once a veryyy long time ago. its not often i get asked though so eh, not like theres much to reject lmao

Fallen for a friend: sadly yeah.. went okay 1 time, lost a friend the other time

DO YOU BELIEVE:

In yourself: depends on what stupid stuff im doing :’) when i seriously try stuff i do tend to believe i can do it though

Miracles: sometimes its hard not to

Love at first sight: attraction at first sight maybe, but theres no way you can know the persons personality and everything by just looking.

Heaven: maybe, but not in the traditional sense

Santa: sadly not ;(

Witchcraft: heck yeah, that would be hella cool

ill tag @subdivisi0ns and @silentfreeway if they want to q:

#tag #thanks q: <3

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br0kenbutterfly · 7 years

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22/5/17

Right, so this week i’ve done a lot of adult talking, and also a LOT of worrying at people - thanks to Cathie, Laura and Dara who have listened to it all like champs and told me its normal and okay to be worried, that I am worth having this surgery, and that theyll be there for me.

I’ve now told several people (IRL, not just on the internet) about my surgery - my flatmates, Laura and Jess, Ella, Cathie, Michele, my boss and my team at work. The big one today was telling my mum. I called her tonight and we had a good chat about a lot of stuff first. It went about as well as can be expected - she is happy (i think?) but is nervous and excited and is nagging me to start taking optifast now so im used to it.. She made a couple of weird comments, like how oh i guess privately they dont care about you so long as you have the money (well i think they care just as much as public surgeons, probably more because they have to answer to their patients, not like public ones who just swan off. Anyway.) She also wants to take the whole 2 weeks off work to come up and see me, which i have said i dont think she needs to do, but of course she thinks she knows better. She also went on a bit about how difficult itll be to get time off...but honestly, expected from her.

Other things Ive now done are try to track my food and fail, havent had any major takeout....i dont think? No KFC or macdonalds. I did have burgers an dbeers on friday. im trying to cook more in prep for life after surgery. Ive been googling the shit out of food diaries - at the moment i think ill just get a plain diary.

#tw surgery #whats my personal tag again

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somedaypast-thesunset · 6 years

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so i really think i am done now.

like im weirdly overwhelmingly speechless but yet have so many thoughts and feelings but none of them of extreme anxiety.

he tells me he went to drop in group therapy today and that hes going to go to rehab after he takes care of me for a month and maybe he’ll be better for spring.

i’m like .........................................

oh. o.ka..y. i just spent weeks - literally weeks - being dragged along by him with phone calls and questions and requests and he saw me invest my energy and time and that i was becoming like excited for this prospect. yesterday i was being told i would make him homecooked meals and take care of his dog. like i was fed everything and boom “maybe, i don’t know, we’ll see”.

and i didnt know how to react because on one hand im like okay cool good job trying something new i hope this gives u something ur looking for and helps the situation. on the other im like wow you literally have zero care about me and even if youre sick and thats the excuse behind this back and forth - you dont care about me. is it the sickness that makes you not care or you yourself? and am i sticking around to find out on the hopes that rehab makes this better? like your complete constant inability to give any respect to another person. its not like im thinking he has to go through with the original plans or else but its like not one time did he mention hey thanks for working on this i appreciate that youre doing this with me and you put time into it and i really want to be on my top game and i know this kind of puts a bump in the road but im hoping that itll be worthwhile at the end of it because we’re on the right track but i am not.

it was just im doing this and this. cool.

u know he cant consider other ppl right he has to only consider himself and how to make himself better while completely neglecting the massive damage he is currently doing around him but its okay because hes going to rehab and if i believe in this opportunity i wont be bothered by a bump in the road.

yes i absolutely think my life story should be tramping across canada i guess by myself now to be with a guy fresh out of rehab. so fuck me right. and im just like.. sooooooooooo.... many emotions. im angry and bitter and sad and heartbroken and i dont know what to be. i dont know whats the “right” path for ME to take. because fuck anyone else fuck it all - whats the right path for me. do i want to be angry? do i want to cry?

except i already knew how this went because i did it before the summer about this fucking trip so its like u must think im literally retarded. if i complained at all in anyway i was an asshole for not supporting his want to go to rehab. i didnt want him to get better. and there was no way to explain that he was just completely neglecting the damage he caused and was causing at this very moment regardless of his positive decision because nothing about making the ecision to go to rehab is that positive. its only positive because youre “getting better” otherwise youre going because you suck right now. thats not a positive decision. it is AFTER fucking rehab. but im not even on this level with him you know. im not saying any of this. i just know that if i say even one single thing about it, im an asshole even though its presented to me by an asshole.

so i told him that i wanted to go and be sad and i talked to him later. he asked me why i was sad and really pressed on the issue and i told him it dint matter and i would prefer to just go but again he pressed and i felt anxious like either i flat out accepted what happened right now and just live my life in whatever new way i was required to in his shadow or tell him that i felt uncomfortable and sad and that he was just going to come for a month and go away again and that didnt make me feel good.

and thus - well he was doing this positive thing and he wanted to feel better and not feel like he wanted to die everyday and you know i had this opportunity where i was too and i had problems i wasnt working on and it doesnt make him feel goo to have to deal with the stress of me being upset about his decision.

and i was just so frustrated. like after two fucking years you still do not get it at all. like omg i could quit smoking everything tomorrow and still feel like absolute garbage and want to di ei could have a great job an still feel like garbage and want to ie because my BIGGEST MOST OVERWHELMING FEELING I HAVE NEVER NOT SHAKEN IN MY DAILY FUCKING BEING is loneliness. and its not like im forcing him to mae me not lonely. but when you offer this stupid dream world where im not going to be lonely, when you put on a mask to parade around and “care for me” after surgery but disappear promptly after its like do you not understand its literally more painful for me in my life to live with loneliness than anything this cyst does to me. anything. i could live with it for a year and it would be less worse than the all consuming depression of loneliness. and by feeling so lonely ive struggled with finding a purpose. and like i have friend(s). i have one very good friend ive had for two years that i really really connect with and really really respect and weve fought but its totally okay and when i feel really alone i honestly think of her maybe first and foremost because i genuinely feel loved by this person. i really really think they would do the most for me and in return i try to do the very most for them. and weve supported major life crisis with each other. we’ve really emapthized and like wanted nothing but the best for each other and like cried with each other and this person is truly an example of why it might be worth giving people more chances.

but i experience such an isolating loneliness and my personal battle because life has decided i will and have experienced this is that i need to embrace being alone because of all the people who have hurt me. i am not prepared in any form to vouch for someone being okay. ive made so many excuses for shitty people and shitty behavior that deeply reflects and scarred my soul so fucking bad. im soooo tired of making excuses for shitty people. im really tired.

i try to bring up that he had fed me all this crap and he bounced between saying “i knew it wasnt true” that he was “pretending to be normal” and that he was still buying the land and he didnt understand why this was such a problem for me because “nothing changed” and finally that he was “sorry” and kept asking me what i wanted or what i wanted him to say and its so disgusting to put the victim in a position where they have to teach you what it is you did wrong when its so fucking obvious that you lied.

and so i thought about it briefly after hanging up and once again - dont get surgery. i was so uncomfortable now. i was like downtrodden and disrespected and nothing of what he said gave me confidence in fucking anything so i had a choice of pretending like it was all totally okay and watching him leave at the end or being upset about it and getting the bare minimum care from someone who kept filling my head with ideas that were never going to actually happen. so now im like vulnerable and have to experience this person no matter what and like i dont even want to talk to him now. im so shocked. lke the full weight of what he just did has not even set in fully but i know that its so fucking heavy it just changed my soul and like the minions are working overtime to figure out how to put this shit back together because i cannot even believe the level of how he trie to sell me on this shit and have zero fucking compassion towards the idea that he once again had to take a new path alone and “couldnt consider me anymore” but “nothing had changed”. dont be upset.

hes going to rehab.

and like im sorry i dont really believe in the recovery of this person other than the symbolic “i went to rehab” because he smokes weed. he refuses - flat out fucking refuses to see what actual fucing hurt he caused people and hes the only person who can work on these things and in no fucking way what so ever do i believe weed has any part of what hes doing. i really dont. if i can be proven wrong in the end ill take it back in respect but fuck him anyways because if a heroin addict shot me in the leg he still shot me in the fucking leg. forgive but im not forgetting.

like the shit he has made me do and go through is abysmal and hes never ever going to admit to anyone that he did these things to me so at no point is anyone going to turn to him and say uhm u did fucking what. so wheres my bonus in all of this when / if it all comes back in the spring and hes ready to go because omg guys he went to rehab and now hes enlightened and sober and better than all of us and still the giant piece of shit to me hes always been. and now more so because i still smoke weed and god u know im a real drug addict.

i told him i was uncomfortable with getting surgery knowing i would essentially be stuck with him for this time and right now i was just really uncomfortable and upset. he said that was fine but he was offering to “fulfill his obligation” of caring for me and he still loved me and if i only wanted him to come make meals and change my banages an leave then he would.

and its like man no. at this moment right now. right fucking now i am full realization that this is super abusive even if youre sick. even if youre sick. because i know this. i did this. and i did this very similarly u know like this woman loved me. she loved me and she cared for me but lke there was alot of things i id wrong like i was lazy and ungrateful and spoiled and a bitch but she cared for me and especially - ESPECIALLY if i was “sick” she really “cared for me” and that cleared her record. everytime i was sick - well u know she did this and this for u. but like she was killing me EVERY OTHER FUCKING DAY and all of this - al of this my whole life with this crazy woman was because she was sick. she was sick and this happened. and he was sick and this happened but like no matter the sickness this fucing HAPPENED. you damaged another persons soul like omg do u think u can get away with punching one of ur kids and going to mental ward one time and never ever have it brought up again no u damaged that kid and ur whole fucking family forever cuz ur sick.

so ur saying before you go to rehab you will come back and care for the person that you have to “have no concern over” thereafter and that person can have literally no fucking emotion like youre a fucking home care nurse they never met before. like omg. are you for real. am i dead? why am i crazy because i think this is uncomfortable, stressful and awkward for the legitimately physically ill person.

he says i can decide what i want, its my body but hes still offering to care for me and he doesnt want to play games because he was fine to take care of me and get surgery before he brought this up and i had already done this before and its like man why are you gaslighting me making me thinking my feelings about this are a manipulation tactic against you when its a legitimate fucking concern for my own well being and why is it insinuatingly so offensive that i switch to concern primarily for myelf when someone says theyre also doing the same thing. thats what makes you the most sick. and no one will ever reall see this. and its like when i realized i would never get anything back from my sick father and 10 years of caring for him and its just like damn. no one - no one will ever fully know what you did and thats how you actually won in all of this. even if i go out there and i say well he did this and this you already diminished my reputation of being like a logical level headed person in relationships and now i look fucing insane especially the embarassment of sticking around.

like i cant even explain all the ways it oesnt feel right to get this surgery. ive had nightmares of dieing and its a nothing surgery. like maybe the anasthetics kill me or something. i have a surprise heart attack from my years of smoking. and if that doesnt happen then im here with him and like i dont even want ot look up what the surgery is because im 50% still in hope that like ill jump right up and be cool and like have no problem taking care of myself and i overestimated how much care iw ould need and its all good. best case scenario. then 50% im like okay if the cyst is as bad as it was and theyre cutting out a whole chunk of flesh and stitching it my likely best case scenario is moderate swelling and pain, moderate body movement and anxiety over a fucking wound thats so deep and like ive never had such a deep wound before and in this area i cant even bend with a cyst and its stitched what if i bent and it ripped like fair enough i could ask many of these questions of my personal anxieties with a doctor. and maybe what really happens is a bit of both and i struggle with feeding and bathing myself and my biggest concern is the set of stairs to the apartment and living in disgusting filthy room.

so now im dealing with maybe a home care nurse level of care. im made some food. my bandage is changed and im left to fend for everything else even though there could be some limited mobility and stairs and just like.. not really being able to do anything strenuous and i imagine not alot of sitting and like this all sucks and now im watching the person i looked forward to the most feed me the bare minmum and leave. or he stays and is of more help and i fall into the same bullshit again. maybe he feeds me over and over these romantic bullshit lines like once i get out of rehab wel do this and this and blah blah blah because hes still fucking sick and theres no controlling what he will actually do so what he demonstrated is that hes unstable an i have no been freshly duped by him and i dont feel mentally strong enough to take the rollercoaster with him in any way shape or form.

as he was repeating some shit about needing to respect him getting care for himself, my phone died and i took a deep breath and put it dow and was kind of thankful that the fates of technology decided this for me because i was really really super done. i know hes serious about going and i know hes serious about having no concern for me because hes already done all of these things so everythhing that happens is tainted to yeah hes right - “i knew all along” that he was a lieing piece of shit and i was wasting my time.

and it bothers me that like on paper im like real shit luck in life, been through so much, have very little in posessions, no family and this person was like oh hey we’ll go do this and this and frolic through the land and its like do you even comprehend the weight of what you just did to this person. and to turn around and say make a way for yourself like im piggybacking off of you? omg.

theres like a top 5 worst people ive ever personally known. my mother almost always tops the list for pure longevity. i have an ex friend who turned so vicious it like fucked us both up in the long run and im bitter about it. my most recent friend would maybe me number 5, maybe in running with my alcoholic friend because besides being nice theyre terrible people. but in this list, possibly #2 has to be him. he is worse than my ex because my ex’s “sickness” was being dumb as fuck and hes like.. hes just dumb. hes not terrible hes just really dumb and like not a good person to be around and even though i got him arrested im not ure he would be top 5. he was just so dumb that im not like traumatize by him im just like man thats on me. thats rly rly on me. but this guy --- im not so fucking retared im just running back to a piece of shit to be shit on with zero fucking bonus to my life. this person has to actively participate in making me want to come back by actions and words. im not stuck with him at all. no money ties. i dont live with him. why woud i go back unless he was gving me something i wanted?

but he was never going to give me anything i truly wanted. and its my fault for sticking around. he told me all of this so i shouldve known even though “we’re going to have a sugar shack, we’re going to have a dog” - and just this mention of the word “we” was soooooooooooo fucking nice to me you have no idea. this really like.. stuck in my head and made me feel a tiny comfort like wow theres a we. i’m not just an i. i’m finally a we.

does he care? no he doesnt fucking care. hes sick. hes going to rehab.

the bestthing he could do is leave me alone. thats truly the very best option. my trust is broken. like nothing he says to me from this point on is believable or true or leads to anything substantial. i should put no weight at all on anything he says which makes any conversation with him totally useless. because even if our convo is political i dont believe thats what he believes anymore. maybe tomorrow he believes something else.

and if you love me. if you actually fucking love me you dont “love me to death”. thats not it. true love of me is an actual understanding of who i am and what ive been through, to really deeply respect where ive come from just lke i have to respect everyones living family my story should be equally respected and taken seriously and not toyed with. thats showing me a true love and if you cannot do this you need to step away and honestly man. its not like a step away for awhile and we’ll see like people are like wow ur so black and white but why am i fucking with a future you when both present and past blew it? there is no evidence to even back up future you and by the time future you outweighs all of this karmically, who the fuck cares that we ever knew each other its like some kid i sat beside in a classroom. like cool bro ur still alive wow nice. i never want to deal with him or anyting about him again. he made me carry so much of his weight he refuses to see it and i didnt need any of this in my life and i didnt ask for him to do any of this in my life. but i shouldve walked away sooooo long ago. i can reprimand myself fo this. but i also know im on my process and this is part of it. this is three years out. im not even homeless or fucked up im just like super sad about all of it.

he had this speech about how i had to get the surgery before because we had to be ready for spring. so he had intertwined this surgery with this proposed future and i had to do it to be prepared and show him im serious and now im like bro if i get one in 3 months who cares ill just go to the hospital again. this is an option. they never said i would die if i idnt get it. its just a like.. quality of life surgery. and my quality of life is shit anyways this surgery and these cysts mean nothing to me and having to go through all of this man.. at one point he had literally said “if you dont get surgery because of me then thats how itll have to be”

so you stepped on other people, you hurt other people and if they dont do a thing to better themselves because they have to deal with you “then so be it”? im going to ~rehab~.

i havent turned my phone back on for a few hours i guess and i really dont want to. he wont have done anything differnt, ill have gotten no messages but i dont know. i just.. i want to forget all of this. him, the surgery. just continue to hobbit for the month or something and “figure something out”.

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cyberdelusionphilosopher-blog · 6 years

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How bad of an idea is it to just get liability insurance on a 300cc sport bike?

"How bad of an idea is it to just get liability insurance on a 300cc sport bike?

How bad of an idea is it to just get liability insurance on a 300cc sport bike?

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://howmuchisinsurance.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr

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Why make a deduction for medical insurance?

I just started a new job, my first full-time job. I guess first thing first: is medical insurance the same thing as health insurance? And my employer handed me a form for payroll deductions. medical insurance is an option. Why would I have money deducted from my paycheck to go to medical insurance? And when the money leaves my paycheck where does it go? I know I could ask someone but weirdly no one else is in the office this week, but I need to fill it out before the new year. Thanks for any and all information!! Happy new year!""

17 pregnant wirh no health insurance.?

I am 17 I turn 18 in June. I found out yesterday that I am 8 weeks pregnant.. I have no health insurance and am wondering what to do?! Is there a way I can get health insurance so I can go to the doctor for me and the baby? Please help.

Insurance for a first Motorcycle?

When I turn 17, I'm thinking of buying a Kawasaki KDX125. What would the insurance costs be like for a 17 year old? (In the UK) and can you recommend a similar bike?""

Cars that are cheap to insure?

My parents have agreed to get me a car for my birthday, i need to find a car that is cheap to buy but isnt too expensive to insure, i will be 17 and will be learning how to drive.""

Car insurance for new driver?

i'm looking to get my G2 tomorrow. i'm unsure what to do about insurance. i'm 17 and currently living with my mom, and often driving her vehicle. i'm planing on getting my own car soon though. do i have to go under her insurance? or do i have to go on my own?""

How bad of an idea is it to just get liability insurance on a 300cc sport bike?

Car insurance advice?

how much money will it cost to insure a 1.4 - 1.6 litre car? I'm 17 and this will be my first car. thanks

What would be a cheap motorcycle to insure....?

im 20 with im going to do a safety course id like something sporty looking...new or used...would it be cheaper to go with a older bike so i can carry liability or do older bikes have alot of problems....inform me with you advanced riders knowledge

Liberals: You are required by law to purchase automobile insurance. Why not health insurance?

The reason you are required by law to purchase auto insurance is so that you cannot screw over society by making them pay for your car accidents when you can't pay for them yourself. Same with health insurance. People get sick and then others end up paying for them. It's much easier to require everyone to pay health insurance, just as with auto insurance. Do you agree?""

Question about how much you think my insurance will be??! please help?

I'm 17. I just got my license. I will be put on my grandmas insurace. She has one car. We plan to share that till I can get my own. the car is a 1995 sc400 lexus. how much do you think its going to be a month?!

Does your parents car insurance increase when you get a drivers permit?

question above

Question about car insurance?

okay so i was recently in an car accident and my car was a total loss. The accident is not my fault. I received my settlement check for my vehicle after paying my deductible for my insurance company. 2 months later now I received another check from the other insurance company at fault with an attached form stating that the check is for repairing the damages on my vehicle. Is this check safe for me to cash out? Not complaining of getting extra money, but Im just curious why would i get another check when i already got a whole settlement check from my insurance company. Shouldnt the other insurance be paying my insurance company instead? any help would be great.""

Where can I get the cheapest motorcycle insurance quote for a brand new VESPA?

I'm 20 years old and looking into buying a vespa to use in Toronto! Looking for the cheapest insurance possible!

Am I eligible for the good student discount for auto insurance if I'm a part-time student?

I have the grades (3.0+), but I'm not a part-time student. I live in California, am I still eligible for the good student discount?""

""Car Insurance in GA, if it is expired?""

i dont know if this is the right category, but my insurance expired and i drove the car not knowing, and i just went to my insurance provider and they said i will be fined? what type of fine and does it add points to my license? any additional information to it that i dont know? it is in Georgia.""

What do I need to add to my auto insurance policy to be considered full coverage.?

I have a car with Calif min. pl and pd. If I were to add a new car what additional coverage and how much would be considered full coverage and satisfy the finance company?

""Haven't been paying my car insurance, help?""

PLEASE READ THE WHOLE THING Okay so long story short, my bank messed up and my car insurance didn't get paid for.. This was about 3 or 4 months ago. And then it just stopped withdrawing money from my account each month, and I figured I would just take my chances and go without insurance. I didn't cancel it or anything. I had State Farm, and I figured because I was getting a new car anyway I wouldn't bother, but getting a new car took a lot longer than than I thought and I just ended up getting one yesterday. So I got a 2000 Buick Park Avenue, it has airbags, all that. It should have a decently low insurance rate. I have gotten 1 speeding ticket, but no accidents. When I called for a quote though, through a different car insurance company, they told me it would be $230 a month. Why is it so high? Is it because I stopped paying for my State Farm Insurance?""

Whats the best kind of car to get cheapest insurance for first time driver under 25?

Why does the political left compare obamacare to car insurance?

car insurance is to cover the other guy, people often have liability only which give no personal coverage whatsoever!!! ca""

Car insurance went DOWN after accident?

I was involved in a one vehicle accident and had a failure to control and hit a guardrail. I called today to get my insurance back and its lower ?? I thought it would go up? Also I ...show more

If you know about car insurance (10 points will be awarded )?

Hey, my older brother has a Honda HR-V 1.6 VTEC engine which is UK insurance group 9 and tax bracket F, I am looking at a Suzuki Swift Sport 1.6 engine, insurance group 9 and tax bracket E... my insurance is with my dads business who say i can have up to a 1.6, I learnt to drive in my brothers car but the insurance company are looking into whether or not i can have a Suzuki Swift Sport, it has no turbocharger, so what is the big deal 10 Points for best answer""

Looking for cheap insurance?

just baught a van and looking for insurance companys numbers,thanks sean""

Can I put my mom in my health insurance?

Insurance cost?

how much would insurance cost if i took drivers ed classes and get a license if you are 16 and own a paid off car

How much would insurance cost for my moped?

So I'm going to be 16 soon and I'm going to get a 50cc moped. Could someone tell me what the average cost of insurance would cost please? Thanks

How can I find an affordable psychiatrist without insurance?

I would like to see a psychiatrist to treat my depression but I don't have health insurance. (I applied for private health insurance but was denied based on my medical history.) ...show more

""My husband is retiring next year and I am unemployed and only 55, how do I get affordable health insurance?""

I have alot of health issues and I need to make sure I have coverage. I have been looking for a job with benefits, but so far no luck. I am 55 and my husband will be 63 when he retires. I need an insurance with no prior health exceptions.""

How much is it to get painting and remodeling permit and insurance in seattle WA?

BMW coupe 1.9 / 2L how much insurance cost for age 22 had clean driving license for 2 years? UK?

BMW insurance for age 22 had clean driving license for 2 years

Car & Health Insurance?

How pathetic of a country are we, that car insurance is mandatory, even criminal if we don't have it, yet health insurance is not? What does this say about us as a society?""

How much roughly will it cost me to get insure on a Volkswagen Golf?

I'm a 17 year old boy, just wanting a ROUGH ESTIMATE on how much it will cost me to get insured on a Volkswagen Golf 1.8 litre.""

How bad of an idea is it to just get liability insurance on a 300cc sport bike?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/insurance-quote-registration-number-danielle-elmers/"

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captain-spookycandycollecti-blog · 6 years

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Whats the best car insurance comparison site for older drivers?

""Insurance , real estate, law question?""

if a person drive a vehicle :D, the vehicle is under the other person name H, H buy the car insurance, the D doenst have the car insurance, and D get in the car accident with K, K is the one who is false, Who is the one false in this situation, it is D or K. Because K are false, will K insurance company pay all the fee in the accident and hospital? Will K insurance company pay for the damage K cause for D? Will K insurance company pay for D health injuries? Even if D doesnt have the insurance, D drive under the vehicle that belong to H, H has the vehicle AND INSURANCE UNDER HER NAME, AND D is H sister.""

""Please tell me the difference between insure , assure , and ensure . Thank you""

Please tell me the difference between insure , assure , and ensure . Thank you""

Can anyone tell me how do you get cheap auto insurance rate and from what company or any website or link?

How do you get cheap auto insurance rate and from what company?can you tell me?

Does auto insurance.... ?

if lets say i hit a car with my car and the other guy claims the accident does the my auto insurance investigate the accident at all or do they just fix the car without asking questions??? im comfused

I need cheap insurance?

I have a vauxhall corsa 1.2 SXi and I am 18. The cheapest is 1300 but I know people have got theres for 900

Car Insurance question!?

ill be 16 years old. I'm getting a 1986-1988 Pontiac Trans Am. Very good responsible driver. so, would car insurance be a lot of money??? What would be a good and cheap company to go with??? name brands please (state farm, All state, 21st Century, ext.)""

Do I need to buy car insurance before driving a used car that I purchase home?

I am thinking about buying a car. I won't know if I'm buying this used car until I go look at it. How do I drive it home, if I won't have car insurance at the moment that I buy it?""

Car insurance?

i am a student, 20 years old, that cannot afford car insurance. Is there a state (ca) program or something for people with really low income?""

""Automobile incident question. Who pays, the business or insurance?""

Im just curious, if a branch of a tree hit my car and cracked it moderately, and i was parked at the parking lot of a gym, does the damages get payed by my insurance or from the gym? If my gym tells me that the insurance pays for it, should i demand the gym to pay?...since my insurance cost might increase because of this incident.""

Does auto insurance cover a person or an automobile?What if someone drives your insured car and they have none

If you drive someone's car who has insurance on their car but you don't have any auto insurance and you get in a wreck does their insurance cover it or could you get a ticket ...show more

How much will my insurance pay if i have a deductable of 500.00????

last week i hit a deer with my car, not on purpose on accident the deer rain right out in front of my car and it messed up my car pretty badly, i cant open my right passenger front door, and i have an adjuster coming out to look at my ca will they cut me a check right today that is what someone had told me i was wondering if that is true or not.""

Car insurance rates for teens?

I just got my drivers license a little more than a month ago. My parents are telling me that they're going to wait for another year before they add me to their insurance policy because it'll be less expense by then. Is this true? I also read somewhere that the earlier you add a teen to your insurance policy, the rates will lower quicker because they insurance company know that i'll have some experience by then. So if my parents add me to their insurance policy now, would it be lower in a year compared to them waiting a year for them to add me?""

How much will my car insurance go up and who should pay?

My ex-husband just bought my 17 year old son a car. He will not pay for the insurance and my son does not have a job to pay for it or for gas money. How much will the insurance cost and who should pay for it? My ex or me?

ChEAPEST CAR INSURER FOR?

I want to get either a reno clio 2001 or an old mini. i know the mini is likely to be cheapest. I'm a 17year old male. Which company would give me the cheapest car insurance? DON'T TELL ME TO GO TO GOCOMPARE.COM TRIED THIS ALREADY, AND ON VARIOUS OTHER COMPARISON SITES. Thanks""

Does anyone know what 'excess reduction insurance' is?

Im thinking of renting a car. In the price quote it says basic car insurance is included but excess reduction isnt. does anyone know what this is? how is it different from the basic car insurance and do u know if the excess reduction insurance is also compulsory?

Progressive auto quote confirmation?

I had to ask a bunch of questions regarding insurance for a certain car for my driver education project and I got an email saying that I quoted with Progressive. What does this mean?

Car Insurance On An Accident?

Yesterday I got in a car accident and it was my fault. It was a very little crash and no damage was done to either vehicle, but I gave her my insurance information anyway. If no damage was done to her vehicle will my insurance provider find out? My insurance provider is State Farm.""

""Im looking for affordable whole life insurance for myself and my husband, we are on a fixed income.?

our ages are male 42 and female 41

Do I need my own car insurance?

I have paid my car off to my mom. She paid for it initially and is the listed owner of the vehicle. I'm 20 years old. Since she is the owner does that mean she will always have to be the primary driver listed on the insurance? If I move out after I graduate in a few months, do I need to get my own insurance plan on the car or stay on hers? I plan to keep her house as my permanent address for at least a few years until I really settle down. It would be cheaper to stay on the plan with her, but can I do that if I don't live in the same household?""

My car insurance went up 50 more dollars a month. They said it's an increase in Florida ?

Do any one know where I can get some good reasonable car insurance

Health Insurance - What's your stance?

Should everyone be required to have health insurance? If you want to keep it hypothetical, assume health care is inexpensive and available. If NO, who will pay for the care of the ...show more""

Why did Geico raise my insurance just because I changed my ADDRESS!?

What in the hell was this all about?! I simply moved 30 mins away from my previous residence and ALL I NEEDED to do was just change my mailing address.....so I went online, gave them my new info.....and they said my premium was increased by over $60.00! Why is this? Has this happened to anyone else?""

Got into a car wreck w/o insurance!?

The other day I accidently backed into this couple that have full coverage insurance. I believed everything was okay until an investigator called and left a message saying that my brother had cancelled my insurance. Therefore, I didn't have any insurance at the time of the accident. The person I hit did not get a ticket and I did not get a ticket. What is going to happen with this? Will I loose my lisence or will I have to pay for their car damages even though they have full coverage? If I call and get car insurance today, will it be effective for the accident?""

I am looking for insurance I am 18 I dont work I live with my god father but he doesn't have insurance either.?

And I was wondering if I could get free insurance in Mo

landlord insurance quote uk

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/home-auto-insurance-quotes-comparison-riley-quinn/"

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