#and Benrey instant becoming the personification of the Eyes emoji

[newtafterdark]

I like the idea of Benrey stealing Gordon's laptop, not just to see what games are on there, but also look through the man's music collection & playlists.

Benrey doesn't actually know much about human music. Yes, of course, there's the Sweet Voice, but that's an entirely different thing... right?

He decides to do research, as much as his focus issues allow him to. Humans use music to convey emotions as well, he finds. It's disappointing to him that most of that happens through lyrics, but humans have to make do with the weak vocal cords they got, he thinks.

"You know how it is with game soundtracks?", Gordon starts as Benrey is mumbling to himself about his findings.

"Uh-"

"In context, they can make you feel things without lyrics. You remember the moment that is related to a song you're listening to... and your brain just- it just remembers the emotion & replays it, I guess."

"Huh."

Things slowly start to make sense to him. While there are no colours to read in the air when he hears human music, he starts to connect certain tunes & noises to emotions as well.

Gordon humming along to a song on the radio while doing chores with him. Tommy tapping his feet & gently drumming his fingers on a surface as he got his headphones on when going to the mall with them. Hearing those small rhythmic tunes start to have the same calming effect on Benrey as his Sweet Voice has on others.

Singing though... yes, he has heard Gordon & Tommy sing before. Nothing big, mind you. Just softly, slightly absentminded-

But one day Benrey overhears loud music coming from the kitchen. Not the usual casual pop stuff that he's used to from Tommy... no, this is something raw. Drums, guitars, bass, electric noises, shrill voices-!

He needs to know what this... means. There is rhythm, there is so much energy in this, who is even listening to- Benrey pokes his head into the kitchen. He needs to know right the fuck now.

Oh.

Gordon is having the time of his life, singing at the top of his lungs into a spoon (oh he's making muffins. dope.), dancing without much direction through the small kitchen, but... he looks so happy? He's smiling as he sings, his laugh lines creasing a bit more, as the drum solo of the song reaches its peak and-

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

Gordon lets the most guttural, bass-heavy metal scream. Benrey is effectively digging his nails into the door frame to the kitchen, wood threatening to splinter, as he tries to ground himself despite the display in front of him. Pink Sweetvoice escapes his open mouth, blown-wide eyes focused on Gordon and nothing else.

This is raw emotion. This is personal. This is more than Gordon's yelling back at Black Mesa. This has a purpose. Good purpose. Good feeling. Great Cool. And yes, it is absolutely beautiful.

Benrey decides right then and there that Metal is his favourite human music genre.

#hlvrai #frenrey #tomrey #benrey #tommy coolatta #hlvrai gordon #gordon freeman #headcanons #this was supposed to be a simple headcanon post #then it turned into somewhat of a short fanfic #I just LOVE the idea of Gordon letting out guttural metal noises #and Benrey instant becoming the personification of the Eyes emoji #fanfics #writing #newt's ramblings #metalhead gordon #fanfic #black velvet rabbits #metalhead gordon au