#also yknow. generational trauma

[darkartistyt]

I SAW THE TAGS U LEFT ON THAT DES ART I DID AND YOU GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU GET IT SO GOOD!!!!!!!!! the fact that hershel did the exact same thing his dad did and how des loves his brother so so so much but is just so angry because hershel fell for the same thing his father fell for, and how desmond did everything right as a parent but lost his wife and daughter but hershel, the golden son, got to have three kids and he just left them, and how in LBMR al is mad towards his father but in LMJ/LMDA kat seems so happy to have him back and how it furthers the parallels of al/des and kat/hersh and not even to think about how flora feels about all this, always being left behind by the prof and now it’s her siblings’ turn to get left behind with her, just OOOOUUGGGHHH THE LAYTON FAM… AAAAUUUUGGHHH

I DIDNT EVEN THINK ABT DES'S FAMILY FUCK THIS MAKES EVERYTHING SO MUCH WORSE (/pos)

looking back at the post itself i am now realising that it cut off the last couple of tags for some reason. probably hit a tag limit or smth idk. so since it didnt keep it there i'll mention it here; there's no way in hell that the happy ending we got in LMDA is going to last

its like. kat's satisfied but al's pissed, des is pissed, and flora doesnt even know how to feel about the whole situation. i imagine with her its like "well this happened before but then it got better but then it got infinitely worse so how do we know it wont happen again." she cant trust that he'll actually stay this time, and it'll probably lead into her growing distant from him. she'll still stay close to her siblings, of course, but how can she trust that their father will be there to, yknow, be their father

meanwhile alfendi and des are unable to put the past behind them and move forward (des i think more so due to trauma but knowing al i think he'd be more vocal about it). so with alfendi it's more like "you left your family behind and we all went through hell and back in the meantime" but with des its more like "you are not only abandoning everyone but you are also continuing the cycle." and its like, the parallels between des and leon are way more obvious and in your face (mostly in the character designs) but with hershel you gotta think about it for more than five seconds. so it makes me wonder how much of leon does des see in hershel...

not to mention the fact that des suffered so much with at least two of his families being stripped away from him and here's his little brother--the one family member he has left, the person who was so disconnected from his bio family that he didnt even know he was a part of it for most of his life--pulling the same shit that fucked up des's entire life in the first place

istg trauma spice and abandonment issues just run in this family... i want to send all of them to therapy

#i love lmda actually #grrr i need to get to work on that post canon oneshot ive been writing bc it deals with exactly this but from hershels perspective #im a sucker for parallels between protags and antags <3 #also yknow. generational trauma #my dumbass ramblings #professor layton #hershel layton #desmond sycamore #flora reinhold #katrielle layton #alfendi layton #inbox

[mudstoneabyss]

actually. the specific phrasing that boy Kevin wants to kill older Kevin with "I must disassemble him, piece by piece, so that everything inside of the Old Kevin comes out. Only then can the New Kevin truly begin." is so incredibly the idea that to heal from trauma and "improve" you have to destroy every "wrong" part of yourself, that everything "tainted" by it has to somehow be replaced by something untouched (which isn't possible)

#reading back that phrasing I do think that'll be the way brinknor takes it #this arcs seeming like it'll be so. breaking the cycle of abuse and violence and coming to terms with yourself #and maybe understanding that you can never remove the parts of you impacted by trauma and start again completely ''pure'' #but you can treat yourself with the kindness you should've been given #which i hope it is that because. and understand i am biased. but i'd love that direction for Kevin #it feels much more satisfying than any more. angsty way this arc could go imo #like he's been through enough! #because of the way Kevin is portrayed in fanon. not as frequently anymore but still pretty common. I worry about coming off as woobifying #by saying I want him to heal I want him to have nice things I think he deserves them #when he's also simultaneously Not A Good Person #yknow the poor little innocent cinnamon roll baby etc etc fanon #but. well for one im Not Like That about him. but my main point of bringing that up is. him not being a good person is why I want to see hi #get better and generally have a good life. why does someone have to be good to deserve to heal from trauma #especially when trauma is a big reason for the way they are #like its fiction yeah yeah i'm still tired of mentally ill people having to be ''good'' to ''deserve'' to get better yknow #i mean especially in fiction you tend to either see mental illness as the poor traumatized one who's allowed recovery because they're nice #or the insane psychopath who cant be ''fixed'' so ''deserves'' bad things-up to deserving to die!- for it #i didnt mean for this to be a rant erm. oops #wtnv #wtnv spoilers #joyousposting

[nick-close]

Dndads fans are the least respectable actual play fandom but at least we. at least, uh. we. well- we have- uhhhhh.. uhhh- we... Glenn Close!!!!!!!!!!

#this isnt an insult i love us #but we r 'i love dndads except for this thing' people usually #we r 'yes it made me cry yes youll have to wait for most of the series to pass before we get there' #'its really funny i skip this bit tho' #i adore it #we r not as strong as cr or naddpod or d20 or taz #nobody knows how to play dnd in our podcast #but boy is it fun #OUR PODCAST NAMED A TOWN THE SAME AS TAZ BC THE DM FORGOT IT WASNT BASE DND #SO MADE IT FRENCH #our podcast is about generational trauma but also its LOOSE #this isnt slander #it fills me with joy #because we take it so seriously and also way less seriously than other pods #yknow? #dndads #dungeons and daddies

[apelcini]

it always feels strange saying that i had a shitty childhood because like. i did. but whenever i phrase it like that people always assume parental abuse or neglect and then i have to be like “oh no my parents were great it was just literally every other influence in my life that sucked” and we all just sit there silently for a minute while they freak out about accusing my parents of emotional neglect and i freak out because i said more than an off handed joke about my shitty childhood which is much too vulnerable and none of us enjoy it. so like what am i supposed to say then

#is there a word for i had my needs collectively abused neglected and/or misunderstood by every adult in my childhood to the point of #maladaptive behavioral patterns from my trauma that still affect my relationships to this day #it was a lot of ableism but there was also general lack of regarding children as people and also misogyny and homophobia #and just generally people being selfish and self centered and not caring about each other under capitalism #antisemitism is. a hard one to gauge for my area. lots of racial diversity but very few jews. lotta korean christians and other #demographics who have. very different behavioral values than my new york jewish family lol #yknow what actually. not gonna get into it at 3 am. that’s what you can call hashtag selfcare

[starlooove]

I think if they were to bring joker junior into the main thing it should be Duke

#like I keep seeing TikTok’s abt ppl wanting jj in main cont rn #and I generally disagree #mainly bc the tim Drake in the animated series was just Jason Todd with a new name #and I refuse to give him any more validity as ‘tim Drake’ #or attribute anything he does or has gone through to Tim Drake #but that’s besides the point #IF they did do it I think it’d be a neat Duke plotline #like dukes entire character has been him being sure of who he is (or at least who he wants to be) and continuing to fight despite the odds #like his character has been about hope not just for himself but for others #I think a joker junior type plotline would fuck him up (lovingly) #and make him stronger yknow 😄 some character building #especially since it’s damn near the same trauma his parents went through #and idk I’m glad jokers dying down but he’s lost a lot of his oomph lately #which I am all for but IF they wanna bring him back as a big deal there we go #and that’s all my opinion actually #I think the last thing I read was the signal #I’m working through green arrow rn so if I joker did do some fucked up shit lately idk man #anyways yeah 😸 #also I think it should be jason that finds him #and we can bring some steel back to him to I’m sick of those funky ass crowbars #fym Jason doesn’t kill anymore 💀 #matter of fact jason should find Duke and kill joker #that’s 3 birds in one stone #for me personally #but neways

[pantestudines]

ultimately I think the worst thing is that all of my issues just seem to be, at the root of it, just kind of having a weird and somewhat bad personality? Like, I don't really have, to my knowledge, any specific trauma, illness, difference in ability, or deviation away from society's standards that explains why I struggle so much. I kinda just suck in a normal way.

#by all intents and purposes i really should be doing stellar and yet #i guess i do have moderate-severe depression but what i mean is like. there isnt a reason for it yknow. #no one died. society doesnt want to kill me. I'm poor but close enough to middle class that its usually not an issue. no trauma. #had a generally happy childhood. a little lonely but i didnt feel it at the time and i wasnt completely friendless #so why am i depressed? who knows! beyond depression why do i struggle with every day tasks? fuck if i know! #frankly im not even sure im actually socially inept due to brain reasons i think im just like that. the way i was raised or something #im offputting strange lazy and all around kinda weird but as far a i can tell this is just because my parents are also like this #and thats not exactly something i can say in an application when talking about challenges ive faced in college lol

[mimzy6bunny]

I'll have to be honest, i watched rottmnt and i love that show but never even once i got emotional enough to cry watching it. Yes that includes the s2 finale and the movie

.......on the other hand now i had take a moment to calm down after watching the 2003 series and seeing that episode with the con man and that little robot

#and im still on season one wtf im actually surprised #tmnt #rottmnt #myn.txt #also same for the 2012 version. watched it in full and didn't cry once #it gets bleak sometimes but i would never say it made me sad sad yknow?? #also rottmnt is too happy a show for me to cry about anything happening bc i know that literally 1min there's gonna be a gag #i think the only part in the whole show that truly made me sad was when raph found splinter trapped in his memories #bc damn talk about generational trauma. like. damn.

[jes12321]

Yo I think I relate to Crowley bc we are both mentally I’ll queers who fall hard but don’t do anything about it, telling ourself it’s because we’re fine on our own, but it’s really bc we know we couldn’t handle the possible rejection that comes with expressing your feelings for another person.

#just imagine me doing a fuckboi face and tucking a hair behind my ear as I say this #also #both of our types are blondes #I prefer tall blondes who could top me #but crowleys pretty based with aziraphale ngl #the only difference I can spot is that he has copious amounts of religious trauma #and I don’t have any bc I grew up in a generally non-religious household #or like #the kind where you celebrate xmas and stuff but don’t go to church #yknow? #yeah you know #we also both have orange hair #or I have orange hair and he has red hair #but semantics #anyway #good omens #crowley

[cosmik-homo]

Lying in bed crying about Alfred's fucked up identity situation

#usually im like. Understandable But Still Yuck about his Samah Apologisms in the epilogue #but i read a quite good Luke Grappling With Vader fic and while not directly applying it did make me think #about how much i feel it's because of how Alfred still measures himself compared to Samah #in a fucked up way. #and how so much of his Issues- this is about the serpent mage emotional abuse but also In General i think he definitely #has some childhood baggage that the whole Last Sartab This Is All On You thing only. Enhanced into the complete. emotional ruin we meet #but all of that. All Of That is about Inadequacy it's about not being Enough in a society that justified it's crimes by its perfection #and then he detaches himself from that and chooses to align himself with the patryn. and. #you know. like. the sartan goverment did do awful things and v much everyone is complicit in privilege ways #but People Are People is the point of the series but the point of the series is also it takes time to drill that point in and this kind of #trauma and hesitance of the oppressed group is v reasonable and worth respecring in some ways. #you know realisticlly he's gonna have to smile politely while people accept his existence as An Outlier To The Still Ancient Enemy cuz #'you aren't really... (vauge handwave at all his stuff) A Real Sartan' and he isn't going to DEFEND HIS EMOTIONAL CONNECTION TO SARTANESS #TO A BUNCH OF LABYRINTH DWELLERS HE'S BARELY GONNA SEE AGAIN. #like even if he wasn't World's Most Confrontation Averse- who would do that #so he's just. yknow. forced to qgain internalize in a way this basic fear or belief he has #and even if he can now build himself a self worth that isn't tied to being A Good Sartan- and he can and he will- #that's still tearing something away so much from a new direction? #AND DON'T GET ME STARTED HOW THIS. LITERALLY CONNECTS WITH HAPLOS CORE CHARACTER CONCEPT #MAN WHO SHREDS HIMSELF TO BITS TO BE WHAT HIS SOCIETY WANTS A PATRYN MAN TO BE AND NOTHING MORE #AND. (gender redacted) who CAN'T. who is too much of all the wrong things but too little of the right ones- #actually no that's the goddamn serpent mage he IS a sartan ideal but #he isn't Granted that. #idk. he's just. his home is a person because they are literally so woven together into one story #but also. haplo very much gets his own community still belonging in and his love interest and. and Alfred just kind of has this. #both worlds and neither situation. #& hes disabled and effeminate and His People are gone and his people are right across the street and may or may not be inventing new slurs #for him. #OH AND HE GETS A GOOD PERFECT USEFUL BODY HE ISN'T SUPPOSED TO OVERUSE OR GET ADDICTED TO THE SOCIAL ACCEPTANCE OF. #just. how do you expect him to believe Samah was wrong about him if everyone agrees- he just Can't Be Enough?

[garlic-sauc3]

thinking about dick being the oldest sibling

#like obv he is #first adopted yknow technical yadda yadda yadda #but also just all the things that come with being the oldest #he was the first so all of bruce's unresolved issues (ahem all of his issues) are pushed on to him #he has the worst relationship with bruce at first #because he was the first so he was kind of the example and he set it up for all the others but he also got the worst of it #he had to fight all the fights first #but as the oldest he wants to protect the younger siblings from the worst of it #and so he has a relationship built in those bonds of having the same parental trauma (generally) with his younger siblings #hes the brother you talk to about all of the daddy issues because he Gets It #its just the fucking trauma of being the first but the inherent urge to protect the rest of them #also he reminds me of my oldest sister's teenage angst / daddy issues playlist #aka numb by linkin park or even perfect by simple plan #anyway idk if this made sense #it was more organized in my head #im just thinking about the bond that oldest siblings have with younger siblings when the parent(s) are kind of shitty #ALSO this is not saying like 'bruce is a terrible parent' or 'bruce is abusive' or whatever #but hes not the best parent definitely #and his relationships with his kids are reflecting that

[hellofanidea]

oof sho got a god complex but both nat and talia got a guilt complex and that just explains the dynamic between all 3 of them so much

OOF that really does just answer for all of them immediately oh my GOD

#i hope this is okay to post? lemme know if not #people like us #morse tag #sho is so complex and so fascinating bc yes she's had an incredibly hard life #but then the question is raised of 'how much right did that give her to treat natalie as she did' yknow #very much akin to generational trauma there i think with all three of them? the complexity of acknowledging the pain of your forebears #whilst also reckoning with the pain they (intentionally or not) passed on to you #i'll shut up now sorry

[spicyicymeloncat]

Letting u guys all know that in my Ninjago s12 prime empire rewrite I’m just gonna make lava canon

#you’re welcome #idk how it just needs to happen haha #well ig it depends if the new season changes the status of Kailor (non existent) or something #idk maybe there’s an episode where Cole teaches Kai how to game for real #Cole gets over his trauma of ai and romance which caused the s3 love triangle #tbh idk how to do it without making it forced #hmmm #bc sometimes romance is awful yknow especially in kid shows #and Ninjago is particularly bad it’s all love at first site #I’ll have to review the seasons general themes ig to tie it in #like how do u live with someone for years and years but only later fall for each other has anyone done that I’m asking as a genuinely #confused aspec person #like I assumed you fall in love over time but surely there’s a limit and I don’t think I need to overhaul 11 seasons just toe justify #lave beyond it’s gay in everything but name content #I also don’t wanna do that where lava is just implied yknow #hmmmm #dating sim episode? #yknow #ahhhhhhhhhhh #I’ll get there #ninjago #lego ninjago #Ninjago rewrite #ninjago prime empire #Ninjago s12 #Ninjago s12 rewrite #oh wait Ik… I’m already changing the dance ep a little bit so I think a lava bplot might fit hmm #on an unrelated I have scary things planned for the rewrite #ok I’ll shut up now

[waterberry-strawmelon]

Random question, but fellow writers/readers:

At what point does portrayal of traumatic events and trauma recovery become romanticized, or when is the portrayal actually more harmful than it is an interesting story?

#does this make sense? #basically I’m personally a sucker for trauma recovery fics #But any story that aims to explicitly portray the traumatic event (particularly if it is related to torture/assault/violence of some kind) #needs to thread the needle about their portrayal of a character’s PTSD so that it is not only accurate #BUT ALSO in a way that’s not romanticizing the trauma. #to be more specific—I have a story idea in mind about a codependent relationship developing between 2 ppl in the aftermath of #an extremely traumatic experience being tortured together. And in particular I wanna explore how a relationship like that #could with time and healing become healthier #and not just a coping mechanism. BUT I have never been through anything NEAR what I might want to depict in the story #should I not post something like that at all; or is there a way I could do it that—with enough care and research and editing #and beta reading—that I could theoretically write something like that without sensationalizing or romanticizing these experiences? #if u have any thoughts feel free to reply or message me or drop by my inbox #just needed a general soundboard yknow? Cuz in all honesty sometimes I’ll read someone else’s work and it’s hard for me to parse if maybe #they shouldnt have written a story like that—or at least not in the WAY they did it. Yknow? #mine #just some thoughts #ideas #fandom

[lightningfilledsaber]

LOL I love how I haven’t gotten a chance to recover from the Christmas Spiral after all the issues w my car as I’m quickly being plummeted into the Shared Birthday Spiral

#mud rambles #this is vague as hell but to elaborate just a little #as we all know i hate christmas for a lot of reasons #mostly i have trauma and generally uncomfortable/shitty feelings centered around christmas #and as for the Birthday Thing #my incestual abuser's birthday is coming up soon and that just so happens to also be my ex best friend's birthday #because fuck my life #so before. the day had been pretty balanced out bc before everything I had someone i loved and who i THOUGHT cared about me to celebrate #on that day instead of having to think about my incestual abuser #and now this is gonna be the first year since at least like 8? that not only am I gonna have to fully deal with that #but now i have the added pain and trauma of not having my best friend anymore! #so the day compounds into bday of my incestual abuser and bday of the person i thought i was gonna be with for the rest of my life but #instead they decided to treat me like nothing. not in the same way as my abuser but yknow. both have treated me like nothing #theyre not abusive for what they did (ex bsf) but it doesnt change that what happened was fucking traumatizing #id love to not have to worry about this shit but unfortunately i dont get to choose what traumatizes me or how people treat me #i only get to choose how i react #shit sucks. it's hard. ive been trying not to think about it but so much has been fucking ass for me lately #and the timing of this shit is just. lovely. when this year marks a full fucking decade since my dad died #but hey! at least i wont have to deal with insensitive ass comments from their girlfriend on fathers day like last year! #i dont regret cutting either of them off for a second i just regret giving so much of myself to them #i regret giving them the power to hurt me like they did #i know i talk about this shit A LOT but like. what the fuck else am i supposed to do when i cant get therapy #to deal with the fact that my best friend of what? 7 years? treated me like fucking garbage and enabled their girlfriend to do the same #im not sorry for talking about it anyway. especially because this is the ONE place i can #i talk to my partner but like. I cant traumadump every single time i think about this shit so. this is the alternatibe #idk im just really. so sick of it. idk what i need to do to feel better #i get better for a bit but then shit happens and i ruminate because what the fuck else can i do #the one good thing about this stupid month is my lil bros birthday but im also sad because idk if he's gonna be able to visit =(

[greatshell-rider]

okay last thoughts for the end of treason’s shore. lots happens in the last couple chapters so i thought it’d be better if i just bullet pointed rather than make a million one sentence posts :p

- what the fuck was tau even up to for the thirty odd years between dropping inda off on shore and picking retired!evred up at ala larkadhe. gimme a book about THAT smith. pls

- thank every god above and beneath that evred was a good dad, enough to be called “papa-evred” HELLO my heart. i would die for his kids. “The magic rings he had given to his sons; Hastred and Tanrid seemed to like knowing where the other was.” hi yes i love brothers. brothers yes

- both hastred and tanrid being autistic 😌👌👌

- fox’s old smile when he tells inda he renamed the knife “treason”. we love ourselves a bastard

- inda’s son jarend being like tanrid (og) but protecting kenda rather than “training” him by beatings. kenda making everyone laugh (you just know he Does put eggs in the rider’s shoes like dogpiss!kendrid)

- vedrid rode with evred to ala larkadhe but i wonder what he did afterwards. probably didn’t tag along with evred and tau as awkward third wheel :p

- we don’t get any more about signi, valda, durasnir, rajnir, or any of the venn! i don’t know if we ever learn more about signi and inda’s kiddo. imagine having signi as your mom damn i’ll sign up

- hey wait a second where did fox stash the knife so no one stole it :sus: unless it just stayed with the marlovan navy lol. hey barend make sure nothing happens to my magic dragon-prowed ghost ship imma want it back someday :)

- sorry but i am just gonna be miserable that inda didn’t get to spend the rest of his life with all of his friends together. why can’t tenthen castle and sailing the sea exist in the same place huh??? explain that one to me smh

- more to be said about inda and tdor but i’d just ramble on gnashing my teeth about various things so. im glad the healer mage could help his arm enough for him to do drills and go on border rides :)

- “Tdor had a new habit, watching Inda’s training sessions with Jarend, Kendred, Whipsticks’ Tanrid, and the other castle boys. They so often ended up with dust flying as Inda and his sons wrestled until Inda lay laughing in the dirt, the boys leaping on his stomach with no discipline whatsoever. Tdor could not explain to herself the dizzying, sharp-edged elation the sight gave her. But sometimes the bliss was so intense it made her weep.”

#thank fuck marlovans don't reuse the same names every generation otherwise it'd get real tough clarifying which character is which yknow :p #wahoo thinking about tdor's making/rending nets theory and signi's outlook on life/hope/joy and tdor's final insights on pain and memory and #death and life #wahoo! thinking #thinking about generational trauma and hot rocks seeing 'the bigger world' and how inda and evred raised their kids as opposed to themselves #fox choosing to put aside his anger at the montrei-vayirs in favor of putting his foot in the door for his son #how inda and hadand teaching evred odni taught him that change was possible mhmm #breaking promises is sometimes a good thing. tau telling evred he did right even if the morvende keep the magical archive closed to him #wahoo thoughts! #it's a good series brent. banner of the damned is coming in the mail so i'll probably reread that soon lmao. ALSO REALLY TEMPTED TO REREAD #TIME OF DAUGHTERS CUZ THEY'RE ALSO V FUCKIN GOOD AND ALSO I THINK HAVE BITS AND PIECES ON FOX'S ADVENTURES SOOOOOO #wooo time of daughters is good tho. man. connar tho amiright lsdkfjlsd what a guy #inda quartet #sartorias-deles #whoo just thought about inda again and nearly went insane again my gods. gnashing teeth. anyway

[snekdood]

nyeah, uh, sorry babe, but my ironic misogyny was definitely sprung from trauma with women. but go awf.

#EYE am the personal and sole reason the world has become more misogynistic #mhmm mhmm makes sense sure #was the ironic misogyny a good thing? no! #was it a trauma response similar to how yall go all men are horrible shitty monsters YEAH! #so fuck you #how about you tell the girl who chased me around her house and cornered me and wouldnt give me her address to leave to fuck off #but ik you wont bc you dont think women are abusive and you dont care what happens to men actually. so #the same girl who also laid on top of me and i couldn't move her and she kept trying to keep me pinned down so i couldnt grab my phone #but yeah yknow #i didn't need to be ironically misogynistic but you also didnt need to generalize all men. #so idk #which trauma response is acceptable? also. when will we learn that a trauma response is a trauma response regardless of how #Un Woke it comes off. #sorry my trauma response wasn't progressive enough for you. lol. idk if i fucking care though since you dont care i have trauma and thats #why i acted the way i did. you think my ironic misogyny is enough to dismiss giving a fuck about the fact i was traumatized #you care more about silencing me than giving a fuck that im a victim of ANYTHING #but please tell me how men like me aren't having a hard time rn.