#We haven't spoken in a while.

[outeremissary]

Hiiii while I'm on here for five seconds know that I miss folks and I hope to be more active again soon now that one of the busiest parts of the work year is doooone

#the only other barrier is that as always I am working to overcome my horrid mental illness #wherein I feel like if I haven't written a novel or something while away for more than a week I cannot dare to show my face in public #if we haven't spoken in a while I am so sorry it's not you it's just that anxiety does run my life sometimes. this is one of those times. #only exposure can make it better etc. but I also genuinely just have not had consistent capacity due to everything else in my life #rambling #I wanna draw some art for a little something I was tagged on when things lighten up later this week though <3 #I am going to learn to draw. a musical instrument. everyone wish me luck.

[macro-microcosm]

You're my friend please explain what the hell is the Goncharov meme

For you, my friend, anything.

Basically, in October 2020 a tumblr user got a pair of off-brand shoes that, instead of having a brand of any kind printed on its tongue, had what looked like copy for a poster for a non-existent Martin Scorsese movie called Goncharov on it.

While the post was popular at the time, it sort of faded into semi-obscure site lore. Like Live Slug Reaction or ants in a microwave it became one of those shorthand jokes that required prior knowledge of one popular post to make, but it wasn't as widely spread as either of those at the time.

For some reason, over the past couple days, it has seen an EXPLOSION in references and jokes about it. According to this post, part of it was that after seeing another popular post about it (one which I cannot find atm), someone made a poster for the "movie" and it all sort of built from there. Before long, the characters were given "canon" names, they were given personalities (kinda...?), a loose plot and even a set of themes is starting to emerge from all of the people speculating and analyzing the contents of the "movie" with depth and frequency that rivals actual massive fandoms. It was even given a "release date" of 1973. Even I, who is terminally online, have not been able to track what is "canon" and how it was established.

Ruining the joke etc. but I would like to emphasize here that no matter how vivid the analyses are, no matter what screenshots you see, this is all a massive inside joke. One which seems to be sort of growing into a massive site-wide rp/art collab, but a joke nonetheless. The only actual source material for Scorsese's Goncharov is a bizarre print on a boot.

If I'm being honest, though, I think this sort of arabesque creation of a piece of media is a much more interesting story than any movie even Martin Scorsese could make.

#i hope this covers it please let me know if somethinf was unclear #or if I'm missing something #this whole thing has gone so wild that at times I was feeling weirdly...gaslit? #like 'oh shit wait was the movie ACTUALLY real?' #but no i assure you that this is just the most involved bit ever to exist #only on tumblr amirite? #goncharov #martin scorsese #any questions? #proxypunch #also we haven't spoken in a while I hope you're doing okay ily <3

[elenadoeslife]

your first love hits different

#another day another vent-in-the-tags post #i came across a picture of me and my fiest boyfriend of five years today. picture must've been 10 years old at this point #found many more pictures of him and us on my dad's old pc #i can just feel my body pull and heart ache when i look at him in the pictures #wondering what my life would've looked like if i hadn't broken things off between us #we tried to stay friends and a couple of months later we went for a drink. when daying goodbye he moved in to kiss me #i was hesitant and stepped away. he couldn't bare having me in his life while not being together so he cut off all contact #don't get me wrong in any of my thoughts- i love babe whole heartedly and he's the only man for me now and in my future #it's just that nagging feeling burried deep. the 'what if's. what if i felt more confident about my body back then? #what if i hadn't moved on so quickly? what if i had let him kiss me? #i tried texting him telling him i was approved for gbp surgery (i broke things off because i was very insecure about my body) #he congratulated me and sincerely wished me all the happiness in the world but also asked me not to contact him again after this #it's been 7-ish years but every now and then i wonder how he's doing and what he's up to #he doesn't really have social media apart from facebook (and that page is private) and i only stayed in touch with his former best friend #but i'm not gonna ask him because i know they haven't spoken in years either #i've had plenty more relationships after him but i rarely ever think about those guys #am i okay? is this normal? lol #i should get my head out of this rabbit hole asap #add: the picture is almost 15 years old lol. my math ain't mathing. we met in 2009. not that it's important #i think i just moved on too quickly and didn't allow myself time & space to grieve. that's why he keeps popping up in my thoughts now & then

[daisywords]

need to be nicer to myself about avoiding making dinner bc I can hear someone else in the kitchen! maybe it's not entirely bc I'm being antisocial! maybe it's bc the kitchen is like 2 square feet! maybe I'm justified

#no I haven't spoken to anyone all day but that's beside the point! #anyway I should have jumped on making my soup at like 5:15 and not procrastinated. then we wouldn't be here #anyway the verdict is that I like having roommates (built-in allies can be something so valuable actually) but I hate sharing a kitchen #anyway while I'm complaining: girl do your dishes you are 28 years old! #when you were gone for like a month there was not nearly as many dishes in the sink we all know its you #I shouldn't have to wash a pan beforehand every time I want to make anything #and we can't just get more pans bc there's no room! #and everyone get your freezer usage in check! I know there's stuff you've forgotten about in there! I moved in and there was no space for m #and it's been months and I can barely fit anything in there #and stop putting my knives in the wrong place in the knife block! #<<me being incredibly petty on this blog so I don't in real life

[insurged]

 ❛   i highly recommend visiting the heyu tea house. their diverse variety of flavors is sure to keep you ( @fearsgod ) going back for more, as busy as you are as a member of the fatui.    ❜

#fearsgod #omg we haven't spoken in a while but <333 #zhongli blabbering about random things #while throwing a jab at a member of the fatui LMFAO #* ⟢ ZHONGLI ( ic )

[wambsgender]

.

#allow me to keep hatred envy and poison in my heart for a minute #you know that earthshattering intense friendship you have as a queer teenager that ends badly and haunts you for the rest of your life? #my one of those was between me and another trans guy #i haven't spoken to him in like 6 years. but i have just seen a photo of him and it made me feel murderous #because he came out to his parents while we were friends. and now he has clearly been on T for a while #and i am still stuck where i was 6 years ago. and I'll never be able to be out and transition like that #and after everything he did to me i just cannot bring it upon myself to be happy for him. #that should fucking be me.

[danceworshipper]

Hi Zin! I started writing my first story about Danny today and wanted to mention that Amit is going to have a main role in it cause he deserves the best. I made the Ravenclaw boys roommates and start both as first years. Amit is one of my favorite HL characters and he shouldn't have become an underdog. I'm glad to hear you appreciate him as much too!

Hey man! Yeah Amit's adorable and HL did him so dirty. The other houses all get characters with huge side plots and Amit just doesn't do enough. He had so much potential so I'm glad he's gonna have a main role in your story. Like imagine having someone who can probably navigate by starlight and speak read Gobbledegook and then tossing him to the side???? Couldn't be me. I actually really love that he gets scared about everything too why are all these teenagers so traumatized that they barely even react to impending doom skfkkg

#amit is precious and I love him #I also ship him with my dude Liam ✌️ #good to hear from you btw! we haven't spoken in a while #hogwarts legacy #mutuals

[allsassnoclass]

Ace Awareness Mini Masterlist

y'all it is asexual awareness week!!!!!!!! I feel so lucky to be in a fandom with so many writers exploring asexuality in their stories, so for this week I thought I'd link some of my fics with ace characters!

Puzzle Pieces

Michael has wanted a soulmate ever since he first learned what the blue on the back of his mother's neck means. This is the story of how he gets three, and how he figures out what that means to him. A/N: my favorite thing I've ever written :)

Bedroom Activities

A sequel scene to Puzzle Pieces where Michael comes out

Partner Steps

Ashton Irwin wants to release his second album. He hires Michael Clifford to choreograph the video for the lead single.

Fire Alarm

Harry accidentally sets off the fire alarm in his dorm building and meets someone new outside. A/N: My first and only narry fic, written with love for Bella

#mini masterlist #unmute also has some interesting ace rep going on but we haven't gotten to that part of it yet #so i didn't include it on this list #guys i have 61 fics under this pseud on ao3. that's a lot. i haven't thought about some of them in a while #anyway! these are the ones where the asexuality is mentioned #i have other fics where they could be ace but it's not relevant or spoken so those don't count for this week #ace awareness week baby!!!! wahoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dykehayleywilliams]

dear god i just found out my ex is expecting a baby yeah i need this paramore album now more than ever

#having a whole ass crisis about this #but not for like romantic reasons? #i am very much over the ex and have been for a long time #but for passage of time reasons #and like growing up reasons #where people who used to be part of my life are married and having kids #while i feel like i'm stuck and a disaster most of the time #but not a disaster in a hot way #but like. a i can barely remember to drink water and feed myself and am consistently an hour late to work every day #and haven't been on a date in almost a year let alone a relationship way #and i'm still not even sure if that's what i want for myself!! #but. other people around me are growing up. and i am not? #also for like people i was once extremely close to but haven't spoken to in 5 years are completely different people now #and the people we once were have changed a hundred times over in the space between #all this to say i'm going to be. even more of a mess than previously anticipated tonight.

[tj-crochets]

🐸 (for the ask game)

🐸 What do you wish people who don't craft understood better? That crafting things is not usually cheaper than buying them, and that it takes a lot of time and effort to make things But also, one specific non-crafter pet peeve. Like, literally I have had this problem with one person: making someone a beanie is not a way of asking for some kind of committed relationship. There was this guy I was good friends with in high school, and we lost touch for a year or two afterwards, and then he reached out to me on facebook. We chatted a bunch, and (crucially) this was after I started crocheting but before I figured out what to actually do with the stuff I crocheted. He talked about it being cold where he was living compared to where we both grew up, so I offered to crochet him a beanie, and we'd been talking about pokemon and our favorite eeveelutions a lot, so I offered to send him an amigurumi espeon To me, this was a combo of "I make a LOT of things all the time*", "I have zero use for beanies it never gets below like 60 degrees here", and "hey eeveelutions sound fun to make but I have no desire or space to keep them", which combined with "hey! a person I can give these to! Give him something he likes, get things I've made out of my house so I'm not overrun, win-win!" To him, this was "I am spending a lot of time and effort to make something especially for you, after giving you a nickname important to my culture**, clearly I expect our relationship to progress after this" He stopped talking to me. For years. Because I'd offered to make him a beanie and an espeon. He told me the offer of the beanie made him uncomfortable? Which, like, fair, if it made him uncomfortable I am glad he let me know and drew a boundary, but I am still baffled. So I guess the thing I wish non-crafters understood better is that, while gifting someone something you made can be a big deal, it can also be not a big deal at all. I have literally given more beanies to strangers than I have to people I know (I donate them to a local shelter) OH MY GOSH I just realized I sweater cursed myself but with a beanie with someone I wasn't dating lol. The unsweater unboyfriend curse *I cannot sit still unless I am doing something, and I found making physical objects is very very good for my mental health so I am pretty much always making something and have been since like...2012ish? 2011? Definitely since 2013, but I'm pretty sure it started earlier than that **It wasn't. He gave me a nickname around the same time I briefly interacted with my bio grandpa, who is Russian. The association with my bio grandpa did not last long (like...one visit) but I learned and really liked the word solnyshko (it means "sunshine" but is used like "sweetheart" and I think that's cute). I also really liked the word "chickadee" as a nickname/term of endearment at the time so like...it was 50/50 which one I was going to use? I'd never really been given a nickname before but figured it was the sort of thing I was supposed to reciprocate

#long post #ask away! #crafter ask game #longagocostumeco #I got a wee bit side tracked from the question lol #I am still baffled and it's been years #like...crafts can be a big deal to gift #I have things my friends have made for me and I love them #and I'm (slowly) making quilts for friends and family and those take a while and are made with love #but like...I kind of think making things for fellow crafters is different? #like. okay. beanies #the beanie I made for this dude was a plain dc beanie with yarn from walmart. might have taken me an hour and a half tops to make #it was a practical thing #I made a beanie for a friend of mine who also crochets last year #and was like...she'll notice and love the details #so I went with a really nice yarn and an intricate pattern with like cables and stuff #idk. I guess it's the intentions that matter? #he and I did start talking again a few years later but then he handled me being disabled spectacularly badly #but! that's a separate story. and he did apologize (years later) #but we haven't really spoken since

[robotpussy]

anyways on a happier note I saw someone from my old school today and we were talking forever on the balcony in the shopping mall 🙏🙏🙏

#we haven't spoken in a while but over like the last week we have been talking about spiderverse i was so surprised #when he tapped my shoulder on the escalator like OMGG HIIIII 😭😭😭

[runthepockets]

Life is nice rn. Hope nothing fucks that up cus I've been miserable and uncertain with the direction of my life for at least 2 months and I deserve a fucking break.

#Started a new job & it feels nice to not only get paid more but also be excited about something I do for the first time in two years. #I think I have a date on Friday with a cute trans girl who likes Screamo? We haven't spoken much but she said I was hot and likes #drinking while taking long walks so we already have three things in common and something to do. #Then I'm doing acid with another hot chick on Saturday and presumably sleeping all day Sunday. #Also. LESS THAN TWO WEEKS TILL FUCKING HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

[blackberryjambaby]

i had a dream last night, so complicated & personal that it's hard to describe but it is something like this: it is permanently twilight. it is quiet. it has to be. i don't know why, but everyone & everything is. i don't know which one of us it is, but my friend is, or i am, born in another city in a soundproof room. in the city we live there is no birdsong or wind sound. no children's laughter. no buzzing of electronics. just soft footsteps on a staircase that could have been my pop's but wasn't. breathing. hushed whispers. so much happened, so many rooms we searched & we found something. it's hard to say what. a secret thing, something we weren't supposed to know, or maybe just something it would have been better if we didn't know. my heart pounds so hard it hurts. the dream ends when i am standing on the porch overlooking misty hills & valley. we're far away from the city but the whole world is quiet so it makes no true difference. my arms around my friend's shoulders. we lean heavily on each other. i think we had cried at some point but i can't remember it. my face is wet. there is a heavy grief at knowing we were supposed to have each other's lives, but didn't. it's cold. i wake up.

#rj speaks #genuinely left baffled by this one #it was so much longer than i can describe & there were underlying currents that i can't explain to others #i know that we had to be quiet because we would be killed if we weren't #i don't know if it's because we would be reported to the authorities for noise but i think that's as close an explanation as possible #ashley's #<- friend who featured in the dream #we haven't spoken in quite a while so i'm so confused #dreams

[reckless-glitch]

not talking to my partner makes me a worse friend to everyone and i hate that im like this and im trying very hard to fix it

idk when my ability or desire to talk to anyone got so tied up with whether or not im having regular conversations with Them but its ridiculous brain stop being like this

#jersonal #we're not like fighting or anything like that #we just haven't really spoken in a while #and apparently that turns me into even more of an asocial recluse

[spooky-drusilla]

boop

boop

#kat!! #asks #we haven't spoken in a while! #how are you??

[forgetful-storyteller]

Something something call yourself a community organiser when you're not on speaking terms with your roommates. Try to host a big bang when you haven't posted about the source material in a year and you haven't interacted with the fandom in longer

#no one here this is abt another fandom im in #idk it's just. Badly done. The person organising it is younger than me and I'm still a minor #sep talks #they haven't spoken on the discord where the (very small) fandom is most active in months. Possibly a year #they don't interact with anyone on tumblr they don't post abt it at all #and they come out of nowhere and act as if they have some kind of authority on this #I'd be less mad if they weren't trying to do it while also being like. Clinically disconnected from the rest of us #you can't be the distant profession making sure this all goes seamlessly because we know you're [redacted] years old #and u USED to actually talk to us #if this was a big event it would make more sense like you have to have some people be impartial to everything #so that no arguments break out and questions get answered quickly #but there r less than 20 of us. Stop acting above us all you just seem like a dick #(can't post on main bc they follow me there)